Module 1: Introduction

Conflict Management

Parties often approach negotiation and conflict management from different

perspectives, differences that can lead to common negotiation mistakes and
disappointing outcomes.

To enhance negotiation and conflict management skills, it’s important to acknowledge

that differences in perceived conflict may be likely. Similarly, actions and statements
designed to convey toughness can backfire by launching an escalatory spiral that is
difficult to contain.

If that happens, recognize that your adversary’s provocations could be intended to inspire
steps in conflict resolution. Try to soften your position and look for solutions using novel
negotiation and conflict management techniques.

What negotiation and conflict management strategies can help you work through a crisis
with your counterpart?

Feel the Other Side’s Pain

It’s a simple fact: in negotiation, your problem is likely the other side’s problem, and vice
versa. This knowledge can help improve your negotiation and conflict management skills.

Reframe the Problem

When engaged in conflict negotiation, we tend to focus on potential losses as compared

with the expectations we had when the original deal was signed. But when negotiations
are framed in terms of losses, conflict management strategies often fail. To overcome this
trap, think in terms of the realities of the new status quo, not what used to be,

When parties begin to look at the problem this way, they become capable of viewing any
deal that avoids the worst possible outcome as a gain for both parties—a mindset that is
likely to lead to greater cooperation and creativity.

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 5 Conflict Resolution Strategies

Whether a conflict erupts at work or at home, we frequently fall back on the tendency to
try to correct the other person or group’s perceptions, lecturing them about why we’re
right—and they’re wrong. Deep down, we know that this conflict resolution approach
usually fails to resolve the conflict and often only makes it worse.

Here are 5 conflict resolution strategies that are more effective, drawn from research on
negotiation and conflicts, to try out the next time you’re tempted to argue your point.

1. Conflict resolution strategy: Recognize that all of us have biased fairness

perceptions. Both parties to a conflict typically think they’re right (and the other side
is wrong) because they quite literally can’t get out of our own heads. Our sense of what
would constitute a fair conflict resolution is biased by egocentrism, or the tendency to
have difficulty seeing a situation from another person’s perspective, research by
Carnegie Mellon University professors Linda Babcock and George Loewenstein and
their colleagues’ shows. When embroiled in a conflict, we need to try to overcome our
self-centered fairness perceptions. We might do this by jointly hiring a mediator who
can help us see one another’s point of view, or by enlisting another type of unbiased
expert, such as an appraiser, to offer their view of the “facts.”
2. Conflict resolution strategy: Avoid escalating tensions with threats and
provocative moves. When we feel we’re being ignored or steamrolled, we often try to
capture the other party’s attention by making a threat, such as saying we’ll take a
dispute to court or try to ruin the other party’s business reputation. There’s a time and
place for litigation, but threats and other attention-getting moves, such as take-it-or-
leave-it offers, are often a mistake. Because of the common human tendency to treat
others the way they’re treated, people tend to respond to threats in kind, leading to an
escalatory spiral and worsening conflict. Before making a threat, be sure you have
exhausted all other options for managing conflict.
3. Conflict resolution strategy: Overcome an “us versus them” mentality. Group
connections build loyalty and strong relationships, but they can also promote suspicion
and hostility toward members of out-groups. As a result, groups in conflict tend to have
an inaccurate understanding of each other’s views and to see the other’s positions as
 more extreme than they actually are. Whether dealing with conflict as a group or on
your own, you can overcome the tendency to demonize the other side by looking for an
identity or goal you share. Begin your conflict management efforts by highlighting
your common goal of reaching a fair and sustainable agreement. Try to identify and
discuss points of similarity between you, such as growing up in the same region. The
more points of connection you can identify, the more collaborative and productive your
conflict resolution process is likely to be.
4. Conflict resolution strategy: Look beneath the surface to identify deeper
issues. Our deepest disputes often seem to involve money: labor disputes over
employee wages, family conflicts over assets, for example. Because money is a finite
resource, these conflicts tend to be single-issue battles in which one party’s gain will
inevitably be the other party’s loss. But disputes over money often involve much
deeper causes of conflict, such as the feeling that one is being disrespected or
overlooked. The next time you find yourself arguing over the division of funds, suggest
putting that conversation on hold. Then take time to explore each other’s deeper
concerns. Listen closely to one another’s grievances, and try to come up with creative
ways to address them. This conflict management strategy is likely to strengthen the
relationship and add new interests to the table, expanding the pie of value to be divided
in the process.
5. Conflict resolution strategy: Separate sacred from pseudo-sacred
issues. Conflict management can be particularly intractable when core values that
negotiators believe are sacred, or nonnegotiable, are involved, such as their family
bonds, religious beliefs, political views, or personal moral code. Take the case of two
siblings who disagree about whether to sell their deceased parents’ farm, with one of
them insisting the land must remain in the family and the other arguing that the parents
would want them to sell it. It’s important to thoroughly analyze the benefits you might
expect from a negotiation that could allow you to honor your principles. For example,
the sibling’s objections to selling the family land might soften if a percentage of the
proceeds are donated to the parents’ favorite charity.
value creation

What is Value Creation in Negotiation?

Value creation in negotiation helps both parties get what they want.

People often view negotiation as win-lose, but maintaining a win-win mindset and adding
issues to the discussion are the keys to value creation and working out a great deal.

Value creation allows parties to integrate various sources of value through tradeoffs and
other creative dealmaking strategies. Even in a negotiation over a used car, for example,
you might be able to look beyond price to identify other issues to add to the discussion.

Value-creating opportunities can be uncovered by searching for a common interest, rather

than letting the differences that exist between you dominate the discussion. Other
promising value-creation strategies include asking lots of questions to learn about what
matters to your counterpart and sharing information about your own interests and
priorities.

The goal of this cooperative problem-solving in a negotiation is to uncover joint gains for
both parties. Value creation is an aspect of win-win negotiations in which both parties
benefit from the agreement.

Remember, though, taking a collaborative approach to negotiation doesn’t negate the

importance of claiming a fair share of the value you’ve jointly created. Effective value
claiming should be based on a thorough analysis of what you want out of the negotiation
as well as what the other party wants.

In sum, remember that situations that appear to be zero-sum rarely are.