Human

Empathy & Sympathy

James R. Robinson asks, how do they relate, and how do they differ?
mpathy’ and ‘sympathy’ are often used inter- Some Examples of Affections

‘E changeably, because they are related terms. How-

ever, they differ in some important ways, which
I hope to make clear. Affections are the star of
the show in this article, because my explanation of empathy
and sympathy as emotional mechanisms rests upon them being
To help us understand affections better, I have a couple of exam-
ples I’d like to explore. The first involves resentment and for-
giveness; the last, diligent attention.
Giving up the affection of resentment towards another person
is a free act of our will which must be successfully performed
different ways of relating to affections. So I will first attempt before one can feel a real affection of forgiveness toward that
to explain what affections are, then why affections are impor- person. Imagine the feeling of relief that can come if someone
tant for understanding empathy and sympathy, before then forgives us for a mistake; and then imagine providing someone
explaining how empathy and sympathy relate, and how they else with that same feeling as we forgive them. Ideally then, in
are different. order to truly forgive, we must freely feel the forgiveness. One
mechanism which attempts to inculcate the attitude of forgive-
Contrasting Affections to Passions ness is the line in the Lord’s Prayer, “Forgive us our trespasses,
Affections are, simply put, the mental expression of emotions. as we forgive those that trespass against us” – the point being
Five examples are enthusiasm, resentment, forgiveness, atten- that we only ought to be forgiven if we forgive others.
tion, and love. I’ll get into the details of some of these exam- Where this affection of forgiveness comes from or as to where
ples later. For now, I think one of the most efficient ways to the affection of resentment goes once we let go of it, are ques-
explain affections is to contrast them with passions. tions I cannot adequately answer here. One possibility, how-
On the definition I’m using, a passion is an involuntary feel- ever, is that affections lie dormant in the mind, and that we can
ing arising in the body. Passions are responses to adrenaline pick from those available to us and choose to make them active.
surges or directly to physical causes. My (unusual) example is One example of the power of affection is in our ability to con-
the passion of a pain felt whilst cooking: specifically, the sen- centrate. Specifically, I singled out the disposition of ‘diligent atten-
sation felt in response to touching a very hot pan on the stove. tion’ as a necessary companion to working efficiently. I note from
This feeling is clearly involuntary – we do not choose to feel the etymology of the word ‘diligent’ – derived from the Latin verb
the sensation of being burnt. (This does not rule out having diligere: to love or hold dear – that it is easier to be diligent in one’s
control over our passions in certain senses: anger is a passon attention (or it is easier to ‘pick’ that affection) if one loves what
but it can be controlled or even channelled.) Moreover, this one is doing, although it’s not necessary to love what one’s doing
feeling is also undoubtedly physical, as it manifests itself within in order to be diligent in one’s attention. Nevertheless, if one does
the part of the hand exposed to the heat. There will also likely not like one’s task, or if one is tired, or for any number of other
be visible evidence of blistering on the skin, or worse. rational or irrational reasons, it will be harder to prioritise that
Affections are different from passions because affections are attitude of diligent attention.
mental and voluntary. By ‘voluntary’, I mean that an affection is It is also worth noting that affections do not come for free.
always willed – it is not felt involuntarily, as passions are. By For example, after a long spell of focusing diligently, one can
‘mental’, I mean that an affection is of the mind, and, conse- have passions of tiredness, which reduce one’s mental ability to
quently, immaterial; it has no material form in the way that a pas- concentrate effectively.
sion does. It’s important to recognise that here I am talking strictly
in terms of the mind, not of happenings in the brain, though no Empathy, Sympathy, & Affections
doubt the feeling of having affections – the feeling of feelings – cor- Now let’s turn at last to empathy and sympathy. The definitions
relates with neurological activity. Whilst the passions manifest I’ll propose are my own, but I believe they capture the way most
uncalled-for in the physical body (imagine the feelings of being people use these words. I define empathy as the entering into or
burnt, or of hunger), affections are subjectively lively emotional the sharing of the affections of another person (though remember
states. Additionally, affections can persist over a long period of that empathy can only be an approximation of what the other
time, in the form of attitudes, or as dispositions. In these senses person is feeling, not a reproduction of it). I define sympathy as
then, affections are clearly in contrast to passions. affections of loyalty, favour, and/or support towards another person.
There may be a grey area between the two types of response, Empathy evidently serves a pragmatic purpose. If we’re able
or it’s at least possible to envisage one: imagine a passion of love to share the affections of those around us, then we’re better able
combined with an affection of love, or an affection of enthusi- to understand them and navigate the social world. At least we will
asm combined with a passion which comes from adrenalin. have some idea, be it only an approximation, of how others are feel-
Would it be easy to draw the line in such cases? However, for ing. This is undoubtedly useful socially. For example, it would
the purposes of maintaining a clear focus, I’ll treat affections well serve an interviewer to be empathetic with their interviewee
and passions as separate. in order to draw out their best answers or lead them down a cer-

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tain path. This is independent of (though equally, does not rule depending on the nature of our relationship with them. Per-
out) the interviewer also having sympathy. So then, someone may haps they are my friend, partner, mother or colleague, so of
want to be empathetic in order to achieve a particular result. To course I have a significant relationship with them; or my neigh-
put it more cynically, if someone knows how a person is feeling, bour, in either the literal or the Biblical sense, or both. Or per-
then they can more effectively manipulate that person in order haps the sight of sorrow in a stranger’s face places compels me
to achieve a specific goal. to act. I invite you to think of your own examples. Moreover,
Since affections are voluntary, this implies that both empa- what form or what way support and favour can be manifested
thy and sympathy are freely felt. This means that to feel either can vary. Depending on the situation, the best form of sympa-
empathy or sympathy is a choice. In the case of empathy, we thy might change: sometimes people need a helping hand or
can choose whether or not to have a subjective mental state someone to be there for them; or validation or to be actively
which is an approximation of the affections of another person. listened to; other times encouragement or a pep talk; or indeed
And in the case of sympathy, we can choose whether or not to constructive criticism or a reconciliation with the reality of what
have a subjective mental state which supports, favours, or is oth- they have done.
erwise loyal towards another person. It is worth exploring why empathy and sympathy are affections
This raises some interesting ethical questions, as we may and not passions. Ultimately, the answer will come down to affec-
choose to feel or not feel empathy and/or sympathy with others tions being voluntary and passions not. However, there is value

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 Human
in providing a counter-example of sorts, and seeing why it fails. can be voluntarily evoked. However, that does not rule out feel-
Let’s imagine you have a friend who has cut his head open ing empathy with any related affections. For example, after suf-
and is losing blood. He will certainly be experiencing passions fering an onset of severe back pain whilst at work, a father may
of pain. If we were to define empathy not specifically as shar- be unable to drive to collect his children from school. He may
ing affections, but rather as sharing emotions in general, includ- call a fellow parent who has children at the school to ask if she’ll
ing passions, then to have empathy with him we too would need pick up his kids instead. Whilst this other parent will not be feel-
to experience similar passions of pain. However, this does not ing the physical pain, she will surely share the affection of con-
match reality. Quite clearly, when someone else is in physical pain, cern that the father undoubtedly has about his children. That
one does not generally feel a reproduction of their pain. Rather, would be empathy. The friend may then also develop their own
the only notable source of similar physical feelings is via remem- affections of support, such as wanting to help the father further.
bering similar physical pains we’ve had in the past. (According to That would be sympathy. Such sympathetic affections can be
my research, this idea is first attributable in writing to Anastasia evidenced by her saying that it’s ‘no problem’ for her to pick up
Philippa Scrutton’s 2013 article, ‘Divine Passibility: God and the children, for example. The practical action is separate from
Emotion’.) But remembering physical feelings does not meet the the sympathy, but it was sympathy that led to the action. More-
criteria for empathy because remembering a physical feeling is never over, it’s clear that it was via empathy for the concern that sym-
the same as feeling a physical feeling! pathy, and then later practical action, was obtained.
In the last analysis, passions are involuntary and therefore
cannot be ‘picked from’ voluntarily, as affections can be. In any Does Empathy Always Lead To Sympathy?
case, and nevertheless, this does not prevent us helping our It is not necessarily the case that empathy will lead to sympathy
physically hurt friend. We can bandage his wound, give him a – that sharing feelings will always produce feelings of support. It
painkiller, and take him to the hospital if necessary. Conse- could be that a person is very empathetic, easily entering into the
quently, the question raised is where do the empathy and sympa- feelings of another, yet they then don’t know how to be sympa-
thy lie in instances of other people’s passions? thetically supportive (or decide not to be). This may be because
That’s actually a trick question, for there can be no empa- they do not have a significant relationship with this other person
thy or sympathy with passions per se, at least according to the according to their standards, and thus are not brought to sympa-
definitions I have proposed here. We can only have affections thy. Or it may be because their relationship with the other person
of empathy or sympathy with other peoples’s affections. I will, is explicitly bad , and they actively decide to not have sympathy.
however, show where I think empathy and sympathy do lie con- Or perhaps they simply don’t want to invest the energy: they’re
cerning people experiencing passions of pain. First, I will pro- tired or busy, or maybe they’re just being selfish. Affections do
pose, it’s via feeling empathetic with the affections that accom- not come for free, either in terms of mental energy, or especially
pany those passions of pain. when practical action is needed – so feeling sympathy for others
does clearly have a limit.
Differences Between Empathy and Sympathy
Given the definitions I’m using, there are some clear differences Associations & Relationships
between empathy and sympathy. As we saw, we cannot techni- The examples for empathy and sympathy I have given in this
cally feel empathy for people who are feeling physical pain, as article have revolved around instances of pain, concern, and
that pain is a passion, and so involuntary, and not something that worry, and possible attempts to alleviate those negative affec-
tions. However, positive affections such as enthusiasm and love
(the latter not always being strictly positive!) can equally be
shared via empathy, and then also built upon and reinforced by
sympathy, via feelings of loyalty and favour. A group of friends,
© MIKE SHIEL 2025. PLEASE VISIT HIS WEBSITE WWW.SHIELLTOONS.COM

family, colleagues, or of likeminded people in a sports club, or

a work group, etc, provide obvious, clear, and natural examples
of more positive situations.
Some fascinating examples can arise for different types of
relationships. For example, a person may have a connection to
someone in the sense that they think of them as their neigh-
bour in the moral or biblical sense, yet they might not even like
them very much personally. In this sense, a person may be empa-
thetic, may also be sympathetic, but out of a sense of moral duty
rather than out of personal fondness. Indeed, all sorts of rela-
tionship combinations and responses are possible. I encourage
you to think of your own – if you sympathise with the idea.
© JAMES R. ROBINSON 2025
James Robinson lives in Somerset, England, and is working towards
becoming a financial adviser. He developed many of the ideas in this
article in his MA thesis, which he wrote whilst living in The Nether-
lands. It can be found here: https://doi.org/10.17613/ec8j4-vtk48

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