PDF_friendly_version_The_Core_Value_Clarification_Toolkit
PDF_friendly_version_The_Core_Value_Clarification_Toolkit
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[PDF friendly version] The Core
Value Clarification Toolkit
By Corey Wilks, Psy.D.
Introduction
You’re here to get results, not read a long boring intro. So let’s go ahead and get
started.
To make sure we’re on the same page, let’s operationally define a few terms:
💡 Values: Part of your moral code that guides your actions, what you consider
important, and matters to your wellbeing and happiness.
💡 Core Value: The most fundamental value that resonates with you above all
others.
An Intentional Life is one where everything you do is aligned with your Core
Value.
It’s your version of complete success, where you spend every day doing what
you most enjoy and find the deepest sense of connection to.
So the purpose of clarifying your Core Value is so you can start building toward
your Intentional Life.
If you don’t like the term “Intentional Life,” you can easily substitute “dream life,” “ideal
life,” self-actualization, eudaimonia, or some other term for the best version of your life
you’re striving to achieve.
Now that we’re on the same page, let’s dive in.
➡ Next up:
Approaches
🤔
How to Discover Your Core Value: First Principles
Clarifying your Core Value means taking a step back from the crowd and all the
psychological conditioning you’ve been fed, and taking a first-principles approach.
You uncover first principles by digging deep, and like any task, you need the right tools.
This goes beyond the “Five Whys” approach you may be familiar with—ask “Why” five
times, and *poof* you magically understand your core motivations for life.
It’s rarely that easy.
Let’s look at how the Why Shovel can help you uncover your Core Value.
It may take one “Why,” or it may take a few dozen. When you search for buried treasure,
how deep you have to dig depends on where you start.
If you’ve done a lot of introspective work before, you won’t have as far to dig. But if
you’ve never thought deeply about what makes you tick, it’ll take time.
It’s when you’ve learned to tell the difference between fool’s gold and the real
deal.
When you can no longer point your finger at a specific person or entity (church, media,
society, etc.) and say, “Because [authority] said this is a good value to have.”
Otherwise, you’re still accepting inherited values—the ones other people have told you
you should have, not the ones you’ve chosen for yourself.
Me: “Why?”
Me: “Why?”
Mark: “Because I used to tutor people and realized I was good at guiding them to
answers and enjoyed seeing them make progress. So I want to keep helping people.”
Me: “Why?”
Mark: “Because I believe if everyone tried to help each other out, we would be in a
much better place as humans. A lot of people don’t go through the trouble of helping
someone else, even if it doesn’t cost them anything.”
Now that’s the nugget of gold—the fundamental kernel of clarity that defines his Core
Value. He values service to others because he believes if more of us helped each other
out, the world would be a better place.
He doesn’t just enjoy helping people. He relates helping one person to a mission
that spans all of humanity and has the potential to make a global impact. This is
why helping people is meaningful, purpose-driven, and fulfilling for him.
Not because other people told him it was good to do, but because he’s developed his
own reasoning about why it’s important.
So now that you know how to use the Why Shovel, let’s dig into some other questions to
help you clarify your Core Value.
Open up the Why Shovel Prompts Exercise here:
Take this time to learn more about yourself and your motivations. Introspection is the
key to developing clarity.
Write your answers here or in your journal, you’ll get 10x more out of these exercises if
you actually write them down instead of just thinking about them.
What advice would I give my younger self (aka, your current self)?
If I had 3 wishes, and my loved ones were already taken care of,
what would my wishes be?
What was the thing I wanted to do before “reality” set in and I gave
up on it?
Values Audit
If you’re still grasping at straws to pinpoint your core value, try this exercise.
Below is a list of values commonly used by leadership institutes and programs. It’s not
exhaustive, but it’ll get you in the ballpark.
Step 1:
Pick 10 from this list of 100, plus any you want to add, and write them down in any
order.
1. Acceptance
2. Accuracy
3. Achievement
4. Adventure
5. Attention to Detail
6. Authenticity
7. Authority
8. Autonomy
9. Balance
10. Beauty
11. Belonging
12. Benevolence
13. Boldness
14. Caring
15. Challenge
16. Change
17. Citizenship
18. Comfort
19. Commitment
20. Community
21. Compassion
22. Competency
23. Contribution
24. Cooperation
25. Creativity
26. Curiosity
27. Democracy
28. Dependability
29. Determination
30. Dignity
31. Discipline
32. Diversity
33. Duty
34. Fairness
35. Faith
36. Fame
37. Family
38. Fitness
39. Flexibility
40. Forgiveness
41. Freedom
42. Friendship
43. Fun
44. Generosity
45. Growth
46. Happiness
47. Harmony
48. Health
49. Helpfulness
50. Honesty
51. Hope
52. Humility
53. Humor
54. Independence
55. Industry
56. Influence
57. Innovation
58. Intellectualism
59. Intimacy
60. Introspection
61. Justice
62. Kindness
63. Knowledge
64. Leadership
65. Leisure
66. Learning
67. Love
68. Loyalty
69. Mastery
71. Moderation
72. Nature
73. Non-conformity
74. Novelty
75. Optimism
76. Order
77. Passion
78. Peace
79. Pleasure
80. Power
81. Purpose
82. Rationality
83. Realism
84. Reputation
85. Respect
86. Responsibility
87. Safety/Security
88. Self-Acceptance
89. Service
90. Simplicity
91. Solitude
92. Spirituality
93. Teamwork
94. Tolerance
95. Tradition
96. Trustworthiness
97. Variety
98. Wealth
99. Wisdom
Step 2:
Got your 10?
Now dig into each of them using the Why Shovel technique.
Step 3:
Now cut your list in half, so you’re left with your top 5 values.
Step 4:
Now pick the top 3.
Step 5:
Now rank them.
Step 6:
What value is at the top?
This is your core value—your golden compass that will point you in the right direction
toward your ideal future.
So when you set your next goals, ask yourself how each one is aligned with your Core
Value and will get you one step closer to your Intentional Life.
“But Corey, other values are important to me, too. Shouldn’t I list more?”
No.
Two things:
1. This overcomplicates it for most people. Learn this system with one Core Value first.
After you’ve got a good handle on it and want to go back and build branches with
other values, cool. Feel free. But keep it simple on your first pass through this
framework to guarantee success.
2. Values are about your priorities. If you have eight priorities, you have zero priorities.
If you have eight guiding principles, dig into them with your Why Shovel to find the
underlying theme they all have in common—that’s your Core Value.
Affluence
Comfort
Happiness
Some are too vague or superficial to be useful when you start creating goals and
building your life and business around them.
An Exciting Life
Empathy
Wealth
Some values are good, but are out of our control—so they’re equally unhelpful.
Impact
Loyalty
World Peace
When you’re brainstorming values, it’s fine to list ones that aren’t within your control or
are vague, because they help get you in the ballpark of what resonates with you.
This is where the Why Shovel comes in—dig into why loyalty is important to you, why
you want world peace, why you want an exciting life. Dig long enough, and you’ll reach
your golden compass.
When you’re discovering your Core Value, focus on one that’s within your control to
pursue, resonates with you on a fundamental level, and—if you pursued goals rooted in
this value—would pave the way to an Intentional Life.
If you’re still not quite clear on your Core Value, here are a few out-of-the-box exercises
to try:
Explain it conversationally.
Don’t overthink or edit your answer to make it sound polished.
Just talk through it the same way you would if you were explaining it to a friend.
Patrick: “To see ideas, or people with ideas, thrive and reach their full potential.”
Patrick: “Because when people tap into their potential, it makes the world a better
place.”
Patrick: “Because an idea can change the world. But if it isn’t pursued, all of its potential
is wasted. And the world remains the same.”
Empowerment.
Write It Out
If you’re lyrically inclined, write a song or poem about what moves you. Write about
separate concepts that, when they align, make the world make sense to you. Or rant
about what’s wrong with the world or mistakes people make and what you wish could be
different about it. Use art to express yourself, then look back at what you’ve created and
identify the patterns—your Core Value is hiding there.
Make Music
If you’re a musician, create an instrumental song that expresses what a life aligned with
your Core Value would feel like. As you listen to it, pay attention to what images your
mind conjures. You’ll start with a fuzzy image of your ideal life. But as you listen to your
song and refine it, your ideal life—and your Core Value—will refine with it. Eventually,
your image will become clear.
What do I despise?
If I was filled with regret, felt trapped, and spent every day in
misery, here is what my day-to-day life would look like:
Make a list of the things that frustrate you the most in your life.
Example in Action: Me
For a while, I struggled to identify my Core Value, too.
Freedom is a common Core Value I see in many of my clients, but that doesn’t mean it’s
the right one for you. Again, dig deep into what value truly resonates with you.
Assumption #1:
You’ve created a false dichotomy, and they’re not actually in conflict with each
other.
Assumption #2:
There is a third variable that ties them together.
Now, with these assumptions in place, what could the third variable be?
He’d created a false dichotomy. Since he thought being comfortable meant avoiding
growth, and pursuing growth required discomfort, he always felt conflicted with what he
Specifically, the freedom to grow and challenge himself and the freedom to enjoy the
fruits of his labor.
Comfort and Growth weren’t mutually exclusive because they were both rooted in
Freedom.
Reflection
So far, you should have two things: your Golden Compass and your True North.
Open up the two pages below and fill them in:
Write your Core Value and describe why it’s important to you.
Collect things like quotes, images, and songs related to your Core Value that
resonate with and inspire you.
Core Value
Quotes
Images
Songs
Collect things like quotes, images, and songs that align with what an
Intentional Life feels like for you.
Doing something with intention means doing it purposefully and being fully in
the present. An Intentional Life takes this a step further, where everything you
do is meaningful, purpose-driven, and fulfilling.
An Intentional Life is one where everything you do is aligned with your Core
Value.
It’s your version of complete success, where you spend every day doing what
you most enjoy and find the deepest sense of connection to.
Quotes
Images
Songs
Now, anytime an opportunity comes your way, or you start to set a goal, ask yourself:
“Does this get me one step closer to, or one step further away from, an
Intentional Life?”
Anytime you’re stuck, or the future seems hazy, return to your Core Value for guidance
on which path to take.
🎨 Fig.: Super artistic representation of you using your Core Value to guide
which path leads to your Intentional Life.
He made a checklist to explore why freedom was the core theme around everything
he’d built his life around and why it brought him fulfillment.
His checklist kept him in check anytime new opportunities came his way.
Does the opportunity encroach on his freedom based on his checklist? No? Cool, it’s
worth exploring. If it does encroach, it’s a clear “no.”
Many opportunities look appealing, but upon closer inspection, they don’t align with our
Core Value or Intentional Life.
Getting hyper-clear on your Core Value helps keep you from getting distracted or thrown
off course.
Now you know where you want to go (Intentional Life) and why you want to go there
(Core Value), but how closely is your current life aligned with them?
Open up the last exercise of the course to find out:
Step 1: How much does my current life align with my Core Value?
Which Venn Diagram best describes your current situation?
If your current life isn’t perfectly aligned with your Core Value, don’t fret! Move
on to the next step.
Step 2: What are the top 3-5 obstacles stopping me from achieving
my Intentional Life, where my current life perfectly aligns with my
Core Value?
Obstacle #1
Obstacle #2
Obstacle #3
Obstacle #4
Obstacle #5
🤘 You’ve made it so far into this course and gained a ton of clarity. Go you!!!
Recap
Clarifying your Core Value is only the first step toward building an Intentional Life, but
it’s the most important.
Because until you know where you want to go and why you want to go there, you’ll
always feel lost and unclear about what you want out of life.
Now you’ve got a clear idea of what fulfillment looks like—it’s a life aligned with your
Core Value.
Here are a few ideas to keep your Core Value and Intentional Life front and center:
If you’re a Notion Power-User, add your Core Value and Intentional Life pages to
your homepage to remind you what you’re building toward.
Get a fancy print of your Core Value and hang it on your wall.
What’s Next?
Future Course
You’ve got the clarity to move forward toward building an Intentional Life aligned with
your Core Value, congratulations!
But if you’re still struggling with how to actually build it—to make it a reality—I’m
developing a cohort-based course to help you do just that.
https://s4bx1gytyql.typeform.com/to/kcGQvzok
Testimonial
If you enjoyed this course, I’d love it if you could write a quick blurb about your
experience and how it helped you.
Affiliate Program
💰 If you really enjoyed this course and would like to promote it to your network,
I’ve got an affiliate program.
You clarified what direction to take your life, and you get to make money by
recommending it to others? Win-win-win.
Subscribe
If you want more actionable insights to build an Intentional Life, subscribe to my
newsletter:
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Private Coaching
If you’re interested in individual or group coaching, check out my coaching page for
more info.
Other Writing
Check out more of my writing here: https://coreywilkspsyd.com/
Reach Out
You can also reach out and ask questions or give feedback by emailing me at
[email protected] or via Twitter
Hey, I’m Dr. Corey Wilks. I’m a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Executive Coach.
I write on topics like mental models, habits, mental wellness, and books that have
valuable life lessons.
I also have a YouTube channel that explores the psychology of business, creativity,
performance, and fulfillment.
There aren’t many places online to get solid insights from psychology you can
immediately apply to your life. Most experts use too much jargon, while most people
writing about psychology aren’t experts.
So I set out to fix that.
Now, I use my 15+ years of psychological training in human optimization and meaning-
making to write online and coach the next generation of innovators.
Have a question, idea for future content, or just want to get in touch?