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Springer Tracts in Advanced Robotics 141
Peter Corke
Robotics
and
Control
FUNDAMENTAL
ALGORITHMS
IN MATLAB®
Springer Tracts in Advanced Robotics
Volume 141
Series Editors
Bruno Siciliano, Dipartimento di Ingegneria Elettrica e Tecnologie
dell’Informazione, Università degli Studi di Napoli Federico II, Napoli, Italy
Oussama Khatib, Artificial Intelligence Laboratory, Department of Computer
Science, Stanford University, Stanford, CA, USA
Advisory Editors
Nancy Amato, Computer Science & Engineering, Texas A&M University,
College Station, TX, USA
Oliver Brock, Fakultät IV, TU Berlin, Berlin, Germany
Herman Bruyninckx, KU Leuven, Heverlee, Belgium
Wolfram Burgard, Institute of Computer Science, University of Freiburg,
Freiburg, Baden-Württemberg, Germany
Raja Chatila, ISIR, Paris cedex 05, France
Francois Chaumette, IRISA/INRIA, Rennes, Ardennes, France
Wan Kyun Chung, Robotics Laboratory, Mechanical Engineering, POSTECH,
Pohang, Korea (Republic of)
Peter Corke, Queensland University of Technology, Brisbane, QLD, Australia
Paolo Dario, LEM, Scuola Superiore Sant’Anna, Pisa, Italy
Alessandro De Luca, DIAGAR, Sapienza Università di Roma, Roma, Italy
Rüdiger Dillmann, Humanoids and Intelligence Systems Lab, KIT - Karlsruher
Institut für Technologie, Karlsruhe, Germany
Ken Goldberg, University of California, Berkeley, CA, USA
John Hollerbach, School of Computing, University of Utah, Salt Lake, UT, USA
Lydia E. Kavraki, Department of Computer Science, Rice University, Houston,
TX, USA
Vijay Kumar, School of Engineering and Applied Mechanics, University of
Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, PA, USA
Bradley J. Nelson, Institute of Robotics and Intelligent Systems, ETH Zurich,
Zürich, Switzerland
Frank Chongwoo Park, Mechanical Engineering Department, Seoul National
University, Seoul, Korea (Republic of)
S. E. Salcudean, The University of British Columbia, Vancouver, BC, Canada
Roland Siegwart, LEE J205, ETH Zürich, Institute of Robotics & Autonomous
Systems Lab, Zürich, Switzerland
Gaurav S. Sukhatme, Department of Computer Science, University of Southern
California, Los Angeles, CA, USA
The Springer Tracts in Advanced Robotics (STAR) publish new developments
and advances in the fields of robotics research, rapidly and informally but with a
high quality. The intent is to cover all the technical contents, applications, and
multidisciplinary aspects of robotics, embedded in the fields of Mechanical
Engineering, Computer Science, Electrical Engineering, Mechatronics, Control,
and Life Sciences, as well as the methodologies behind them. Within the scope
of the series are monographs, lecture notes, selected contributions from
specialized conferences and workshops, as well as selected PhD theses.
Special offer: For all clients with a print standing order we offer free access to
the electronic volumes of the Series published in the current year.
Indexed by SCOPUS, DBLP, EI Compendex, zbMATH, SCImago.
All books published in the series are submitted for consideration in Web of
Science.
123
Peter Corke
School of Electrical Engineering
and Robotics
Queensland University of Technology
Brisbane, QLD, Australia
This Springer imprint is published by the registered company Springer Nature Switzerland AG
The registered company address is: Gewerbestrasse 11, 6330 Cham, Switzerland
To my family Phillipa, Lucy and Madeline for their indulgence and support;
my parents Margaret and David for kindling my curiosity;
and to Lou Paul who planted the seed that became this book.
Foreword
At the dawn of the century’s third decade, robotics is reaching an elevated level of
maturity and continues to benefit from the advances and innovations in its enabling
technologies. These all are contributing to an unprecedented effort to bringing robots
to human environment in hospitals and homes, factories and schools; in the field for
robots fighting fires, making goods and products, picking fruits and watering the farm-
land, saving time and lives. Robots today hold the promise for making a considerable
impact in a wide range of real-world applications from industrial manufacturing to
healthcare, transportation, and exploration of the deep space and sea. Tomorrow,
robots will become pervasive and touch upon many aspects of modern life.
The Springer Tracts in Advanced Robotics (STAR) is devoted to bringing to the
research community the latest advances in the robotics field on the basis of their
significance and quality. Through a wide and timely dissemination of critical research
developments in robotics, our objective with this series is to promote more exchanges
and collaborations among the researchers in the community and contribute to further
advancements in this rapidly growing field.
This is a refined remake of the volume of the second edition of Robotics, Vision and
Control – Fundamental Algorithms in MATLAB® by Peter Corke in 2017. The work
now comes in two split volumes: one devoted to Robotics and Control, and the other
to Robotic Vision. The first volume contains material from the first nine chapters of
the previous single volume, covering: foundations on pose, time, and motion; mobile
robots with navigation and localization; kinematics, dynamics, and control of robot
manipulators. On the other hand, the second volume contains material from the first
two chapters and the tenth to fourteenth chapters of the previous single volume, cov-
ering: foundations on pose, computer vision, image processing and feature extraction;
image formation and multiple images for the geometry of vision.
The outcome is a two-volume handy set which is confirmed to be shining in our
STAR series!
Naples, Italy and Stanford, USA Bruno Siciliano and Oussama Khatib
November 2020 STAR Editors
vii
Foreword
to the Second Edition
Once upon a time, a very thick document of a dissertation from a faraway land came
to me for evaluation. Visual robot control was the thesis theme and Peter Corke was
its author. Here, I am reminded of an excerpt of my comments, which reads, this is a
masterful document, a quality of thesis one would like all of one’s students to strive for,
knowing very few could attain – very well considered and executed.
The connection between robotics and vision has been, for over two decades, the
central thread of Peter Corke’s productive investigations and successful developments
and implementations. This rare experience is bearing fruit in this second edition of his
book on Robotics, Vision, and Control. In its melding of theory and application, this
second edition has considerably benefited from the author’s unique mix of academic
and real-world application influences through his many years of work in robotic min-
ing, flying, underwater, and field robotics.
There have been numerous textbooks in robotics and vision, but few have reached
the level of integration, analysis, dissection, and practical illustrations evidenced in
this book. The discussion is thorough, the narrative is remarkably informative and
accessible, and the overall impression is of a significant contribution for researchers
and future investigators in our field. Most every element that could be considered as
relevant to the task seems to have been analyzed and incorporated, and the effective
use of Toolbox software echoes this thoroughness.
The reader is taken on a realistic walkthrough the fundamentals of mobile robots,
navigation, localization, manipulator-arm kinematics, dynamics, and joint-level con-
trol, as well as camera modeling, image processing, feature extraction, and multi-view
geometry. These areas are finally brought together through extensive discussion of
visual servo system. In the process, the author provides insights into how complex
problems can be decomposed and solved using powerful numerical tools and effec-
tive software.
The Springer Tracts in Advanced Robotics (STAR) is devoted to bringing to the
research community the latest advances in the robotics field on the basis of their sig-
nificance and quality. Through a wide and timely dissemination of critical research
developments in robotics, our objective with this series is to promote more exchanges
and collaborations among the researchers in the community and contribute to further
advancements in this rapidly growing field.
Peter Corke brings a great addition to our STAR series with an authoritative book,
reaching across fields, thoughtfully conceived and brilliantly accomplished.
Oussama Khatib
Stanford, California
October 2016
ix
Preface Tell me and I will forget.
Show me and I will remember.
Involve me and I will understand.
Chinese proverb
These are exciting times for robotics and we have seen much recent progress: the rise
of the self-driving car, the Mars science laboratory rover making profound discover-
ies on Mars, the Philae comet landing attempt, and the DARPA Robotics Challenge.
We have witnessed the drone revolution – flying machines that were once the domain
of the aerospace giants can now be bought for just tens of dollars. All this has been
powered by the continuous and relentless improvement in computer power and tre-
mendous advances in low-cost inertial sensors – driven largely by consumer demand
for better mobile phones and gaming experiences. It’s getting easier for individuals
to create robots – 3D printing is now very affordable, the Robot Operating System
(ROS) is both capable and widely used, and powerful hobby technologies such as
the Arduino, Raspberry Pi, Dynamixel servo motors and Lego’s EV3 brick are avail-
able at low cost. This in turn has contributed to the rapid growth of the global maker
community – ordinary people creating at home what would once have been done by
a major corporation. We have also witnessed an explosion of commercial interest in
robotics – many startups and a lot of acquisitions by big players in the field. Robotics
even featured on the front cover of the Economist magazine in 2014!
So how does a robot work? Robots are data-driven machines. They acquire data,
process it and take action based on it. The data comes from sensors measuring the ve-
locity of a wheel, the angle of a robot arm’s joint or the intensities of millions of pixels
that comprise an image of the world that the robot is observing. For many robotic ap-
plications the amount of data that needs to be processed, in real-time, is massive. For
a vision sensor it can be of the order of tens to hundreds of megabytes per second.
Progress in robots has been, and continues to be, driven by more effective ways
to process data. This is achieved through new and more efficient algorithms, and the
“Computers in the future may weigh no dramatic increase in computational power that follows Moore’s law. When I started
more than 1.5 tons.” Popular Mechanics, in robotics and vision in the mid 1980s, see Fig. 0.1, the IBM PC had been recently re-
forecasting the relentless march of sci-
leased – it had a 4.77 MHz 16-bit microprocessor and 16 kbytes (expandable to 256 k)
ence, 1949
of memory. Over the intervening 30+ years computing power has perhaps doubled
20 times which is an increase by a factor of one million.
Over the fairly recent history of robotics a very large body of algorithms has been
developed to efficiently solve large-scale problems in perception, planning, control
and localization – a significant, tangible, and collective achievement of the research
community. However its sheer size and complexity presents a very real barrier to
somebody new entering the field. Given so many algorithms from which to choose, a
real and important question is:
One strategy would be to try a few different algorithms and see which works best
for the problem at hand, but this is not trivial and leads to the next question:
How can I evaluate algorithm X on my own data without spending days coding and
debugging it from the original research papers?
xi
xii Preface
Fig. 0.1.
Once upon a time a lot of equip-
ment was needed to do vision-
based robot control. The author
with a large rack full of real-time
image processing and robot
control equipment (1992)
Two developments come to our aid. The first is the availability of general purpose
mathematical software which makes it easy to prototype algorithms. There are com-
mercial packages such as MATLAB®, Mathematica®, Maple® and MathCad®, as well Respectively the trademarks of The Math-
as open source projects include SciLab, Octave, and Matplotlib. All these tools deal Works Inc., Wolfram Research, MapleSoft
and PTC.
naturally and effortlessly with vectors and matrices, can create complex and beauti-
ful graphics, and can be used interactively or as a programming environment. The
second is the open-source movement. Many algorithms developed by researchers are
available in open-source form. They might be coded in one of the general purpose
mathematical languages just mentioned, or written in a mainstream language like C,
C++, Java or Python.
For more than twenty years I have been part of the open-source community and
maintained two open-source MATLAB Toolboxes that date back to my own Ph.D. work
and have evolved since then, growing features and tracking changes to the MATLAB
language. One of these, the Robotics Toolbox has been translated into a number of
different languages such as Python, SciLab and LabView and more recently some of
its functionality is finding its way into the MATLAB Robotics System Toolbox™ pub-
lished by The MathWorks. It forms the basis of this book.
These Toolboxes have some important virtues. Firstly, they have been around for
a long time and used by many people for many different problems so the code can be
accorded some level of trust. New algorithms, or even the same algorithms coded in
new languages or executing in new environments, can be compared against imple-
mentations in the Toolbox.
This book takes a conversational approach, weaving text, mathematics and code
examples into a narrative. I want to show how complex problems can be decomposed
and solved using just a few simple lines of code. More formally this is an inductive
learning approach, going from specific and concrete examples to the more general.
In my own career I have had the good fortune to work with many wonderful peo-
ple who have inspired and guided me. Long ago at the University of Melbourne John
Anderson fired my interest in control and Graham Holmes tried with mixed suc-
cess to have me “think before I code”. Early on, I spent a life-direction-changing ten
months working with Richard (Lou) Paul in the GRASP laboratory at the University
of Pennsylvania in the period 1988–1989. The genesis of the Toolboxes was my Ph.D.
research (1991–1994) and my advisors Malcolm Good (University of Melbourne) and
Paul Dunn (CSIRO) asked me good questions and guided my research. Laszlo Nemes
(CSIRO) provided great wisdom about life and the ways of organizations, and encour-
aged me to publish and to open-source my software. Much of my career was spent at
CSIRO where I had the privilege and opportunity to work on a diverse range of real
robotics projects and to work with a truly talented set of colleagues and friends. Part
way through writing the first edition I joined the Queensland University of Technology
which made time available to complete that work, and in 2015 sabbatical leave to com-
plete the second.
Many people have helped me in my endeavor and I thank them. I was generously
hosted for periods of productive writing at Oxford (both editions) by Paul Newman,
and at MIT (first edition) by Daniela Rus. Daniela, Paul and Cédric Pradalier made
constructive suggestions and comments on early drafts of that edition. For the second
edition I was helped by comments on draft chapters by: Tim Barfoot, Dmitry Bratanov,
Duncan Campbell, Donald Dansereau, Tom Drummond, Malcolm Good, Peter Kujala,
Obadiah Lam, Jörn Malzahn, Felipe Nascimento Martins, Ajay Pandey, Cédric Pradalier,
Dan Richards, Daniela Rus, Sareh Shirazi, Surya Singh, Ryan Smith, Ben Talbot, Dorian
Tsai and Ben Upcroft; and assisted with wisdom and content by: François Chaumette,
Donald Dansereau, Kevin Lynch, Robert Mahony and Frank Park.
I have tried my hardest to eliminate errors but inevitably some will remain. Please
email bug reports to me at [email protected] as well as suggestions for improve-
ments and extensions.
Writing the second edition was financially supported by EPSRC Platform Grant
EP/M019918/1, QUT Science & Engineering Faculty sabbatical grant, QUT Vice Chancellor’s
Excellence Award 2015, QUT Robotics and Autonomous Systems discipline and the
ARC Centre of Excellence for Robotic Vision (grant CE140100016).
Over both editions I have enjoyed wonderful support from MathWorks, through
their author program, and from Springer. My editor Thomas Ditzinger has been a great
supporter of this project and Armin Stasch, with enormous patience and dedication in
layout and typesetting, has transformed my untidy ideas into a thing of beauty.
Finally, my deepest thanks are to Phillipa who has supported me and “the book”
with grace and patience for a very long time and in many different places – without
her this book could never have been written.
Peter Corke
Brisbane,
Queensland
March 2019
Preface xv
1 Introduction . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
1.1 Robots, Jobs and Ethics . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7
1.2 About the Book . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8
1.2.1 MATLAB Software and the Toolboxes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8
1.2.2 Notation, Conventions and Organization . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9
1.2.3 Audience and Prerequisites . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10
1.2.4 Learning with the Book . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11
1.2.5 Teaching with the Book . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11
1.2.6 Outline . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11
Further Reading . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12
Part I Foundations . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13
2 Representing Position and Orientation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15
2.1 Working in Two Dimensions (2D) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20
2.1.1 Orientation in 2-Dimensions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
2.1.2 Pose in 2-Dimensions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24
2.2 Working in Three Dimensions (3D) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29
2.2.1 Orientation in 3-Dimensions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30
2.2.2 Pose in 3-Dimensions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44
2.3 Advanced Topics . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47
2.3.1 Normalization . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47
2.3.2 Understanding the Exponential Mapping . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48
2.3.3 More About Twists . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50
2.3.4 Dual Quaternions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53
2.3.5 Configuration Space . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53
2.4 Using the Toolbox . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54
2.5 Wrapping Up . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56
Further Reading . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58
Exercises . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 59
xvii
xviii Contents
5 Navigation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 123
5.1 Reactive Navigation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124
5.1.1 Braitenberg Vehicles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124
5.1.2 Simple Automata . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 126
5.2 Map-Based Planning . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 128
5.2.1 Distance Transform . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 128
5.2.2 D* . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 132
5.2.3 Introduction to Roadmap Methods . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 134
5.2.4 Probabilistic Roadmap Method (PRM) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 135
5.2.5 Lattice Planner . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 138
5.2.6 Rapidly-Exploring Random Tree (RRT) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 142
5.3 Wrapping Up . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 144
Further Reading . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 145
Resources . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 146
MATLAB Notes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 146
Exercises . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 146
Paul and I made our call one fine Sunday afternoon. The Josephs
were French people, who were not entirely Anglicised, and they
received every Sunday.
My first impression of Muriel was a disappointment. She was a
striking, unusual type, most attractive in her way; but at first she
failed to realise the mental picture I had drawn of her; and did not
strike me as I had expected she would. After too keen an anticipation
of pleasure, the actual realisation is often a disappointment. Muriel,
as I remember her the first time we met, was a most uncommon
looking girl. Although small, she would have been remarked
anywhere for the wonder of her eyes and colour. They were large,
round, wide-open, prominent; and of a brownness and brilliance
most rare. These wonderful eyes were set wide apart, and when she
looked at you a leading question was put to your very soul. Evil-
minded persons were always disconcerted by a look from Muriel, a
thief or a liar, I am sure, never looked her in the eye. To say that her
colour was a pale, transparent white is only an attempt to describe
what was a curious and amazingly beautiful phenomenon. Her skin
was the whitest thing I ever saw; it was like semi-transparent light;
new-fallen, downy snow; and when she smiled a deep dimple
appeared in one cheek and produced a dark shadow. Nobility sat
upon her brow and a most human kindness was promised by her
lips. Her hair was a dark, red-brown, showing many shades. Her
manner was frank and easy, but behind it a keen observer could
detect a sort of disdain for things in general, including humanity.
When I say I was disappointed in her, it is hardly an adequate
expression of my feelings—hopelessness—more truly expresses it
than disappointment. She had a ready wit, and could make one
perfectly at ease or glad to escape from her presence.
“Well, Jack, what do you think of her?” asked Paul, as we walked
home after our call.
“So, so,” I replied. “She is nice, she is bright, she is uncommon,
but——”
“Ah, but, of course, but,” exclaimed Paul. “You cannot know in a
look; you cannot feel all the charm of a unique personality in a few
minutes spent in a drawing-room full of people. And then she is
young—only sixteen.”
“She looks twenty,” I said.
“Of course she does to a simpleton like you, who does not
understand girls who have been about. She is the loved and spoiled
child of a great man, who knows everything except how to bring up
his numerous family. She has been abroad, she is out in society, and
intends to stay out. She does what she likes, a woman of the world,
and refuses to go back to a convent where, some may think, she
should be.”
“These things make a difference, I suppose,” I said. “But look at
her father. The doctor is an old man. She must be over twenty.”
“I have no patience with you,” said Paul. “She looks twenty
because she is wonderful. You are blind. You cannot see. It is
because her father is an old man that she is so spoiled and so
wonderful. Doctor Joseph is twenty years older than his wife and
consequently Muriel is precocious.”
“Doctor Joseph is about a thousand years older than his wife in
brains,” I said, laughing. “I do not fancy Mrs. Joseph. She is a hard
woman.”
Thus we discussed people who looked upon us as the silly
goslings that we certainly were—fluffy, callow birds, not half-fledged.
The eve of the dance arrived at last. I thought it never would
come, and half-hoped it would not, or that I had not been invited. I
wished to get it over. I hated to go, yet could not stay away.
I wore my first evening clothes that night. I had only worn them a
very few times before and knew exactly how green and gawky I was.
I feared that my shyness and simplicity would make her smile, which
did not increase my confidence in myself.
I went to the dance in a high fever and when she greeted me I
blushed. She looked at me with kind eyes—eyes that understood.
How I love people who understand and can let you know without
words. The understanding eye is one thing, the knowing eye is
another. Muriel had the former, with no gleam of the latter.
We call the mounting of a jewel a setting, and the word “setting”
seems to me the only fitting word to use regarding Muriel’s dress, it
so completed her. She was set in a severely plain but beautiful gown
of bluish or purplish gauzy brocaded stuff which appeared to me
more like an artistic drapery than a mere woman’s dress. I know the
tint intensified her pallor. I noticed this time, too, that a delicate pink
flush flitted beneath her skin when she became animated. This
colour was not a blush and could hardly be called colour; it was the
shadow of a shade of pink which came and went like magic. She
was entirely without ornament of any kind except a small diamond
star she wore in her hair, which was done plainly, a large artistic knot
resting low down upon the nape of her neck.
I knew, after the dance, that everything Paul had said of Muriel
was true. It was even far short of the truth. There were many, many
things which he had not said of her, that I could have told him, for, of
course, I saw everything—everything that was there, along with
many attributes that were not there. I was in love with a woman, not
this time with the detail of a woman, but with every dear part of her. I
believe she saw it at once. I was a new experience to her. Her men
friends and admirers had all been of the sophisticated world. I had
the charm of freshness for her. I was frank, I blushed easily and
frequently, I could not dance—really I was a most rare and
uncommon boy.
My admiration must have been very apparent. Paul saw it and did
not resent it. He thought it was only admiration. He could not imagine
such audacity in me as love for the incomparable Muriel. Even if he
could have imagined it, he would have laughed the idea to scorn; for
did not Muriel know him, admire him, love him? Did he not dance
with grace and sing to command admiration?
“Jack Wesblock? Bah! A mere gawk!” he would have said, without
hesitation.
I did not confide to Paul the actual condition of my mind in regard
to Muriel, in fact I was hardly ingenuous. I could not be, as I was
sure he would not have understood. I confided in John, who took me
seriously, and we sat several sessions late into the night on the
subject.
I made my party call at the Joseph house, alone, one Sunday. I
was very nervous going alone, but could not bear to go with Paul. I
was received as dozens of others, made my share of polite remarks,
drank tea and retired in good order, after being asked to call again by
Muriel. This invitation was not seconded by Mrs. Joseph, who had a
way of looking down on a tall man which was very remarkable in a
short woman.
Things happened during this, my last year at college, in such quick
succession that it is nearly impossible to set them down in any kind
of order. It passed as no year has passed before or since. I met
Muriel frequently at the Skating Rink. She did not skate, but the rink
was the regular winter rendezvous of hundreds of young people,
skaters and non-skaters, who met and chatted, and flirted and had
tea. Skating was a secondary thing with many, and it became so with
me.
I became a regular visitor at the Joseph house, and formed a
friendship with the Doctor, who liked young people. My talent for
mimicry and comic songs amused the old man, and I became
perfectly at home with him. He enjoyed yarns with a point, and I
industriously worked to provide him with well-told whimsical and
amusing tales. Also I wanted to know things, and had always many
questions to put to him, which he always seemed happy to answer.
Thereby I acquired many useful bits of knowledge in various
directions.
My cultivation of the Doctor was not premeditated cunning, for in
fact I was strongly drawn to him. Many evenings I spent most of the
time with him, not with Muriel. I preferred that to being forced to take
my share of her amongst a crowd of young chaps, and Paul always
at her side.
Mrs. Joseph disliked me at sight, and her hawk-like eye watched
me. She knew I was in love with Muriel long before any one else was
aware of it. She thought my cultivation of the Doctor was cunning,
and knew I was dangerous.
The few opportunities that came to me of seeing Muriel alone, I
made the most of in my own way, and she knew my mind long
before I blurted out the truth, which happened one moonlit night,
when we were returning from a tobogganing party. She was not coy
or coquettish, but frankly admitted that her love was mine.
“But what of Paul?” I asked her.
“Paul?” she exclaimed laughing. “Why Paul, any more than one of
the others?”
“Because he loves you, and you have loved him,” I answered. “Did
you not tell him so?”
“Love Paul!” said Muriel. “It is too ridiculous. I never loved him. Not
a word of love has ever passed between us.”
I was so hurt I could not speak. Either Paul had woefully lied, or
Muriel was deceiving me or trying to. I hated to entertain either
thought. I was silent.
“What is the matter, Jack?” asked Muriel. “One of the things I have
admired in you is that you were not small. I knew you loved me long
ago, and I loved you, and particularly admired you because you left
me so free with other men. Surely I have not been mistaken? You
are not jealous of Paul?”
“If you love me, Muriel, it is enough; I am satisfied; but Paul is my
friend, and he has told me things that are evidently not so.”
“Oh, Jack,” exclaimed Muriel, “about me? What has he said? Tell
me.”
“That you loved him. That you slept with his picture under your
pillow. That you wrote him letters daily, although you saw him so
frequently, and that for months you have bullied him and made him
toe the line of your wishes.”
Muriel was at first very much inclined to be angry, but changed her
mind and decided to be amused.
“Paul must have been telling you his dreams,” she said, and
laughed. “There is not one word of truth in these things you tell me.
Paul and I have only been chums. I like him and enjoy his music, but
love there has never been between us, believe me!”
“I do believe you,” I said, “I am glad to believe you, but can you
explain why Paul should lie so tremendously?”
“You do not understand Paul,” said Muriel. “He is just a poetic and
shallow thing. I do not believe he ever made love to a girl in his life.
He has told me of many of his conquests, which I see now could
never have happened. You must allow me the pleasure of telling him
how matters are between you and me.”
So Paul was disposed of. He never forgave me, and said I had
cruelly and treacherously robbed him of his love. As it pleased him to
think so, I never enlightened him. During this year I grew in many
directions. I was a man engaged to be married. My growth, in what is
known as common sense, was slow. The great thing was that Muriel
loved me and I loved her. That seemed to me to be everything;
nothing else mattered.
My studies were neglected and a wild year passed in dances,
theatre parties, musical orgies, drives, skating and every kind of
pleasure which makes time of so little value to the young.
Muriel was a pleasing combination of wisdom and foolishness.
She had a tremendous influence upon me, which she might have
used wisely. What we both knew together would not have covered
any great area to any considerable depth. We were young, spoiled,
thoughtless, shallow. She appeared far more sophisticated than I
did, which was produced by her absolute confidence in herself, an
element sadly wanting in me.
And now I took to herding with the wild boys at college, and
thereby fell considerably in my own estimation. I did not drink, but I
became familiar with those ladies of the demi-monde who lived for
and by students of a type. I was shocked in my better self, but lacked
control.
These days were full of failings to live up to my own standard. I fell
and repented, and fell again. Periods came regularly upon me when
I had to cut loose, and go back to first principles. The painted siren
called me and I went. It seems nearly like a sacrilege to mention
these things while telling of my love for the woman who became my
wife, but it is not. My love for Muriel was at once the cause of my
falling and the reason of my being able to go through a difficult
period without much harm. My love was one thing, the call of my
body coming late into health and strength was another thing quite
apart, and I treated them as such. I was not really brutal or a roué,
but was cutting my wisdom teeth a little later than most boys.
We foolishly and unwisely despise the demi-mondaine, and
hypocritically pretend that she is altogether vile, shutting our eyes to
the plain truth that she is much more a part of our system than the
nun. Or we refuse to admit her existence altogether. We make her,
and we are responsible for her. She is a necessary part of things
sexual. The churches are responsible for the hypocritical attitude
towards this unfortunate type. Religions always go to extremes. Time
was when the prostitute was a sacred person, consecrated to the
gods. Now we go to the other extreme and make her an outcast, and
consecrate her to the devil.
Jess was a celebrity among college students of my time. She was
young, beautiful and witty. She was well-educated and talented, and
a woman of a high type in some respects. If the word can be used
towards a woman of her profession, she was even modest. I admired
Jess while I loved Muriel. I was much ashamed of this affair at the
time, but see it with very different eyes now. I was of a very pliant
character, and my life, like most lives, followed the path of least
resistance. It was easier to make Jess part of my life than to resist
her.
How Jess came to be what she was need be no part of this tale.
Hers was a free life. Although still a young woman, her experience of
the world had been wide, and had made her very wise. She was four
years older than I, and she looked upon me nearly as a naughty
child, and was sorry for me. While our intimacy may not perhaps be
considered nice, it was an eminently useful one to me. She was a
tower of strength to me, saved me from much harm, and enlightened
me on many vital things of which I was wholly ignorant. She was one
of the curious anomalies of human society in this country, a refined
and cultured demi-mondaine.
Considering the debit and credit between good and evil, of my few
months’ experience with Jess, I see the balance was on the side of
good.
I do not pretend that such things are defensible or ever have been,
but say what you will and do what you may, young men will give way
to animal spirits till the millenium. Woman in some respects presents
an exceedingly serious problem in connection with college life. The
matter cannot be met with “thou shalt not” or the ordinary moral
punishments. All that can be safely done is to warn the young in a
fatherly and kindly manner of the real dangers of the way; after that,
the issue rests with the individual. Some come through the fires
refined and sublimated, better fitted for larger usefulness in every
way, others are scorched and warped; the weak are utterly
destroyed. As for myself, I came to no particular harm. This was due,
no doubt, to my natural disposition.
A professional man of strong opinions and with the courage of his
convictions married Jess, and very nearly succeeded in forcing her
on his social set, but she died nine months after her marriage day
while the fight was still going on. Had she lived she would probably
have been stoned. To me she is a very pleasant memory; a very
unfortunate woman with a great character.
It seems to me that a great deal of our boasted virtue is nothing
but very dangerous ignorance. Many marriages turn out very
unhappily for no cause but the want of necessary knowledge of the
affairs of sex. If men entered the state of marriage in the condition of
blind ignorance in which most women enter, there would be a far
greater percentage of unhappy marriages than there are.
I was cast for one of the end men in a large amateur minstrel show
this winter. Muriel was greatly pleased, and was sure my comic
songs would make a great hit. I bought a beautiful tambourine and
thumped it diligently in the cellar daily. But alas! After three
rehearsals I was asked to resign my chair to a fellow who had the
nerve I lacked. I was quite confident that I could do it, and have done
it many times since, but at the time I still blushed like a girl, although
I was nearly twenty, and a chap who blushes is hardly fit for an end
man in a minstrel show.
It took years of struggle before I conquered the characteristic
something in my mental make-up which caused me to lack
confidence in myself, and made me shy, shrinking and fearful.
If you take the doings of this very eventful year into consideration
you will not think it surprising that at the Christmas examinations I
was handicapped with three supplementaries, or that in the following
spring I was plucked once more. This time I expected it, and was not
cast down. I realised that getting an education in the college way
was not for me. Father and mother were, of course, somewhat
discouraged, but they had seen it coming.
CHAPTER VIII