\~ - -.

as*
NO "NOVOSTI
IS GOOD NEWS
by Tomas Schuman

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* Novoeni tpronoluuwd No-vas-ln) mum

"news" In Russian language. It Is .to the
name of' a Soviet KGB 's front for equin- . .
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nage. |»I°9=\9\°4=- dnslnformullon and
subvunlun. Novwu Fran Anne! (APP) -.;;
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nuwurls spreads m tcnhdn Ill two .
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4

world. In selves the ulltinllil ynes 0453

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C0mlllullial Ellie - world dqgiipi Ag "
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I worked for R. ,J . .
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 Table of Contents
I. What kind of "press agency" is Novosti?

2. What do they mean by "propaganda"

3. Novosti from roof to basement. ming; and people In between.

4. Nolrosti's "kitchen", or should we say '"outhouse"!'

5. One day in the life of a Novusti employee.

6. What are foreigners?

7. A loyal and dodicotcd stepson (of how to got recruited to the

KGB).

s. A ride for Look magazine.

9. No birds with two stones.

10. In the name of World Peace.

t L Dawning of "Detente".

Drawings and covers by Soviet dissident anises Vyacheslav Sysoyev

and Boris Mukhamexishin

ALMANAC

Los Angeles, 1985

 1

WHAT KIND OF A "PRESS AGENCY"

IS NOVOSTI?
II. is"an inforrnntiou ngenoydflhe Soviet publkorlnlulr.alions."
says the official Charter, - '°... lo promote peace and undersland~
ing between :he nations of' the world.l Ever since the Novosii Press
Agency (APN) was established in February 1961 . Ill1rlly a yea:
paaaed without a scandalous evidence ofwhlt kind of "publis"olg|-
nizatiom are using APN and for elul sort off' "informa\iuu."
In 1963 the Government of the Congro Republic (KinsliH8).
teddy - Zaire. expelled fm espiornge and subversion u Soviet
eonespondent Benik Beknazar-Yua:bashev. an employee ul' wu
Soviet orgmlzatlons, bum equally "public'l Nuvusli old the KGB!
Five years later Llrejuurnalist died in Moscow, oflirriully from blood
cruces. UuolGc.iully. aeuurdiug to rumors circulated among the
Nuvosli rafters, me cause of dearUl was u slrarnp: lnsunrhle deserve
inoculated into him Ina Congo prison by the A[rican"brotl\ers"a.ra
Lulu: ul' Lair grnuilude For Benik's fur too uclivc work lo tum the
young Afzicau slum irlw a Soviet colony.
lrr May. 1963 aurullier Atrium country. Kenya. expelled another
employee of APN-KGB. whose mime was diplomstieally not even
rrxrrliuurzl in the Kenya press."
Ill MamzlI, 1966 Kenya was less rliplomullein espellingyet nnorllfer
APN-KOB man. Yuri Kurilsirr. His rime was mmtionerlf
Ill 1964. Washington rcwivod u Sovkl dipblnalt. deputy chief
aliloI of. Novouils lrnrguilre, "$ovkl Life". published olficlally bY
Lln: USSR Embassy in the USA. Hismmre was Boris Kllrpo\dch,Hld
he Dana limner dcpiny nlueinnan oIINuvo=ni Prenshgency. Comrade
Karpovieh lasted an a "joullm.linl" only till January 1965. to be ex~
petted as "person nun galan* Than. uid not discourage Moscow at
all. Ever sirnx. Linn position has been owupiW bya KGB man. Pre-
aenlly, he is Oleg Benukh. my former APN boss.
In 1965. a humorous and sociable Boris Korolyov. also known
uunong us. Novosii sndlers. by Me nick-nnnlc "ant", arrived in
Ouawa. His affiliation with the KGB. even his rank Icolondl was
well known in advance lo :he RCMP (Canadian eoumcr-int,elli-
gnce), and for that muuer to the press. Bur Canadian press at Mal
time was zoo busy lambasting the American CIA to reveal the KGB.
Korolyov enjoyed unprecedented hospitality: during :he peak of Me
Soviet invasion into Czechoslovakia. In August uses, Ouawu press-
club kindly ufrmu ks premises no my pal Korolyov to no.: a wel-
coming banquet in honor of' another Soviet. agent arriving In
Cauioda. He was "Pnvda's"wrlespurl.d¢lll Kxxnslanlin Geivundov. I
do not know how cllccrivc the two comrades were as spies (and if
dlere were anything to spy upon in Canada under Pierre Trudeau),
 ¢ pqn al- " ww

we World phase
A Srwlat pm rgtnin pamgslez with Khrushchev's picture lies amid the debris fallowing time ouster of Conlnunist
dip mats from t Congo by Mobutu and Kasavubu. The pamphlet says, "Han of! the Congo."
 a
but 1 know that (ieivandov was expelled in 1974. whilst Korolyov
remained and became renown in the press as a strong "critic". or
rather slanderer. of the exiled Russian classic Alexander Solzhcnit-
syn] .
In 1977. in New Delhi, India, there was a handsome and snobish
Novosti correspondent named Vladimir Simofiov. lt would be a
waste of time no look for him al out headquarters in Barakhabma
Road number 25. There were not too many reports by Simonov In
the Soviet press about India. No wonder' Vladimir Simonov was a
KGB officer whose duty was not so much reporting from India, as
attracting the media. diplomats and politicians into Soviet orbit. For
that activity Simonov had to reside separately from the Soviet
diplomatic anthill. in at spacious bungalow with Indian servants and
two cars. According to an American friend of mine, up!'s foreign
correspondent Dale Morsch. who met Simonoy frequently in New
Delhi. Simonovls attempts at recruitment were primitive. naive and
rude. Maybe they were ... But India even now remains in the Soviet
sphere of influence, government of the late prime-minister Indira
Gandhi all but condoned Soviet invasionin Afghanistan. and hosted
the Soviet-sponsored "Conference of the non-allied" countries toge-
ther with Yasser Arafat and Fidel Castro. And Indian press remains
rather anti-American despite wisdom. subtlety and politeness of the
American agents. and, possibly. as a result of "rudeness" of the
Soviet ones.
Comrade Simonov's stay in India was cloudless all the way till
1970. when I defected to the West. Later Simonov re-emerged nrielly
in Canada as a "press-officer"of the USSR embassy in Ogawa. when
I was already employed by the Canadian Broadcasting Cofpor-ation
(CBC). I would not be surprised a hit. if my former senior comrade
played a part in the KGBelTOr!s Wunlcash Canadian °`!rudeaucracy"
on me and get me out of the C'BC's International Broadcasting
rvicc for my -tight wing extremism"... Presently. in wtss. as write
this book, comrade Simonov is accredited in New york city as a
Novosti correspondent and a stringer for the Soviet °' Llteratumaya
Garcia." Obvious promotion!
In 1967, Alexei Kazantscv was expelled from Ghana tor espio-
nage. He was another Novosti-K GB hybrid whom I knew personally
and met occasionally in Moscow in 1968. between my assignments 10
India.
From 1967 on. during the annual exhibition "Expo"ln Montreal.
a number of my Novosti comrades were functioning is translators
and ekcuronic espionage operators ab hard of"Alc:4.-\ ndcr Pushkin".
the Famous KGB "low boat." One of my KGB contacts gave me a
lou: of the °'resl.ric1»cd areas . 1h: lower deeksand holds. Of' the ocean
1967, Moscow. Novosti men (Victor Dubogmi in the center)
selellruting assignment to Vietmuu. Below: 1916, "Killing
fields" of Indochina after Soviet "fraternal aid"...
u IE
 5
liner when it was docked in Leningrad between cruises. After my
defection, I used that information (and some photographs] to alert
me American press and the FBI to prevent admi*\ 'on of *Pushkin*
5

or similar .spy-ships to Long Beach harbor during the 1984 Olympic

games. Wilh my humble contribution. l suspect. American consetva~
give and patriotic groups succeeded to force the Soviets to "hoycot"
the 1984 Olympics. Good riddance! It was the first Olympic Mmes in
the history - without dishonest Soviet State gladiators posing as
"amateurs" ... Also I credit myselfwithan effort In save I .is Angeles
from a small invasion nf some 15,000 KGB agents, arriving as
"guests" for the Olympics.
At the end nl' 1967 my former school-mate at Oriental la hguages
Inslitllte Vikram Duhngrai was assigned to Vietnam. OffieIaNy- to
Hanoi as Nnvnsti cnnnspnndent Acnnrding to "sources" - viktor
was sent tO the $ ll¢d "liMmted areas"nf Knuth Vietnam as one of
the KGB instructors. Al the very time the Sovid junta was talking
about peace and denouncing the American "war times", the KG B
was hmrkdly ueatinga slan¢I-by force of mass tefmrand opp&on
in the image nf the Kan..-in South Vietnam. As it became evident in
April 1975. the KGB efforts were extremely '°prodtnttve" halfofthe
pnpnbtion ended up in " duealion camps."
In he 1068, n.n orders from the KGB, a large group of' Novosli
journalists. including myself, were conducting :I secret "opinion poll"
among foreign diplomats and comespondenls in Moscow: "How
would their governments react to Soviet involvement in Czechoslo-
vakia`."` Evidently. the KGB was satisfied with the results. for on the
23-d of August. 1968. Sofie links crushed th rough stneeis of Prague
... None of the Weslem governments "reacted".
And in the morning ofAugust28. 1968 N ovosti Press Agency stall
was saying Inst goodbyes to two of our comrades. who were burned
alive when their army helicopter crashed near Prague, while carrying
a load of propaganda designed to convince the West. that Soviet
troops were "invit.ed"to Czechoslovakia by"palriots. " Fa ke publica-
tions were printed by the APN-KGBin Dresden. One of the roasted
comrades was Karl Nepomnyashchi an old-time KGB officer.
In May. 1976. Novosli correspondent in Japan, Alexander
Machekin was arrested by the police in Yokohama. when he tried to
buy secret information from a junibr officer from the US aircraft-
carrier "Midway" dodged in Yokohama'
Between 1980 and 1985 at least a dozen Novosli-KGB agents had
been expelled during massive counter-intelligence operations from
several NATO countries and France, It look Western intelligence
services, law-enforcement agencies and eourls almost T\VENTY
FOUR YEARS (btostartdoingsomething to protect theircountries
 ....».~o~ .-n- - ~"'~~~~
01.1

e
against APN-KGB subversion. Why so long?
15 years after my defection from the USSR embassy in India, 15
years after l was debriefed by the American CIA and revealed the
nature of APN-KGB activity in the "Third World" - more than 15
countries of Asia. Africa and Latin America had been infiltrated.
demoraliied. dcslabilized. subverted and some - INVADELD by
military force, and kept occupied... And yet, Novosti Press Agency
is still officially accepted in all the capitals of the world! Once in a
blue moon. Western bureaucracies "undertake drastk measures".
like denying an entry visa into USA to a Novosti agent, trying lo
come to some "university conference". It happened recently - to a
"Russian journalist" A. Makarov.°
The above list of instances. illuminating the nature of Novoni
Press Agency is far from complete. What kind Ola "news agency" is
Novoszr'
I. Pravda. January 4. 1961: Izvania. March 23. 1961.
2. The KGB. by John Barron. Readers Dige>L 1974. page 513. - \.

3. Mosvowlr Hand M India. by Peter Sager. Born. 1966. page 22. -.

4. my African Standard. Nairobi. March II, 1966.

Q:
5. The KGB. by John Barron, page 524.
6. Tbrawlo Sun newspaper. January l1. 1974.
7. The Las! Circle. collection of' article; un Solzhenitsyn. APN.
1974.
8. The Monlrea!ISlar, May 14. l 9'76.
9. UP). August 20. 1984.

The geographical location of Novosri Press Agency is a sort of

spaihl trick; headqnarrers of the APN locate!! at Push kin Squaw.
light behind the uilra-mnriern Russia movie 1hcalrc in Moscow.
while the "brand:hts" it' Novosti. according no the ofGciaI Charter.
are located in the capitals and my}or cilics of 130 countries of the
world. Yet Novosti foreign bureaus are in most cases not called
"Novosti'° ac all - [or they are auached to or constitute the entirety
of the lnformatian Deparlmenls of :he USSR embassies all over the
world.
Time-wise it is similarly tricky the APN exists simultaneously in
several eras. One in fhul within Novosti elements of the prc-histo-
n'cal Commtmkrn. war-Communism of post-revolutionary era.
middle--ages with its inquisitors and witch-hunts. [assist meh with
its own Goebnlses something from democracy o{today's West. md
wen vermin elements of Orwellian-tw¢ Iutune - the new-spew* and
remodeling of history.

I
 7

The very name of Novosti Press Agency Isa beautiful example of

the newspeak and rem i ds one either of Orwell `s"M inistry of Truth"
or *Evtu:»hez\ko': "Min try ofTenderneaa.°ITI\e fact in, thul there in
no news as they one erroneously and non~marxi.stlike understood in
the West --- as reports about the current events. This sort of news
could easily contradict the prophesies of the founders of Marxism-
Lcninism. and thus give a wrong and totally urwcientific picture of
reality.
Neither Ls there any "press" in Novosli Press Agency. at least in the
meaning of the word accc ptcd in the West and related to jo untalistic
profession. Dut it docs not mean that the APN hasbro press. "Press is
the most potent weapon of' Our Party". said the Friend and Teacher
of all the journalists Joseph Vissarionovitch Stalin - and he was
right. In the APN the word press is understood mainly ass technical
term - printing press, or as an abstract term in a scnlcncc: "The
Soviet Press is the most truthful press in the world", a slogan that
decorates walls of many editorial offices in the USSR.
The only would most relevant to the activities of the APN is
"agenoy°'. To understand better the nature of the oecu patron of some
500 jourrmlists. 2500 editors and copy boys. 1000 typists and secreta-
I ies arid close 1u3000 tccluliearlserviur: slaffond auxiliary vol kcrs. let
us have a closer look at the semantics of this term. According to the
Etyntulogicai Dictionary of Russian Language by C.P. Tsiganenko,
wav 16:
"Agency ... agent - a trusted body. or a person. The
word borrowed (rom Germans at the beginning d` the
seventeenth Century A.D. "Acting" -~ participial form
floru th: wool snagctt¢"--- lu ulovt, lO utgc no mow. Thus
in 'Eurollc¢m languages, 'al5eul.` - any force in nature 01
society. which muses luoveiueut. See also 'Agitation :
Let us soc the meaning ol"agilaltiou.'Thc wool. lb wualasll ace. has
a lol w link 1.1lc APN will tix tkpai llncul of Agilatiou and Plupa-
ganda of the Central Commiucc of the Communist Pau ly of the
Soviet Union - Agitprop. The relation between the two. the word
and the department, is not only sununlic. but aadIuinislt ativt: as well.
So:
"An activity with u purpose of' poliljcui upbringing ul' llw
masses. From Latin.'Agiwlio` - nluvelntznt. activity. An
abstract noun from the verb 'agclc' - too \:Acitt:. iuuilc.
_PROVOKE..
Now we haw got to it very interesting word --°'provokc°`. Let us
sec now what is it tsnauliy tht: APN "provokes"thc masses ofpcoplc
Lu du. A cuuoisc Political Diet ionafy edited by A.R. Dobrmttavova
on page 5 says:
 g.,

RAYTZ you EVER NAD am' mumP SINUF

you tsEL'aau=; A commu:4¢s'r Anoint 'mum
ABILHY 'to HELP B!,Ac\-1 m~:orz.e
The cunmwmsz Party f¢('\'£MYl~s that 0iac-k
Pvwk* Una mol; vmsxiann uw Vu-wt uppvewnt
mwzhm or penpte in me t=11aw.1 Snakes in oh"
mu: we xrp up p:'u¢iw~\ it :he must n»i!iL.lm
lrmiung; Ni' rcwtiswnwc uidx6Iz We nmtincs of this
eosuiuy. 'rhercfora we :vs Black people are me
natural leaders of a revdulivm wlurn wws4
WUiznufely orerNarow no American ruling, class
liras Intel Use 10190825 of nil Amuriwn people,
lllavk people man! free Hxcmsclves

M;.An;»e#z Davis . pawn In the APN-KGB D8ST48Il.IZA~

WGN eve» She ms Nov0.;liS "WET Of honor" while in
the USSR. the lea flet above was printed In (ht USA bY a
Novogfi from.

.|
 9
"Agltallon. verbal and primed. is a political activity
directed to Influence consciousness and mood of the
masses with the purpose of attracting or involving them
in active participation in solving of important socio-pol|-
tical and economical tasks. 'I he means of agitation: dis-
cussions. meetings. newspapers, radio. television. cine-
ma . posters. cartoons etc. Agitation is a sharp and potent
weapon of political struggle between classes and parties.
See also 'propaganda'.
All right! Let us see what Mrs. Dobronravova and Soviet ofNciat-
dom considers propaganda. in the same dictionary. on page 210:
"Fropaganda - is the process ofcxplanaltion .dissemina-
tion and establishing of political ideas, theories and
teachings. Propaganda has always a clans character. it is
always parl.is8n. Communist Party's propaganda is vcr-
bal or printed explanation and dissemination of ideas of
Marxism-Leninism and of the current policy of the
Communist Party. II is an inseparable part of the current
policy of the Communist Party. It is an inseparable part
of the p¢>Iili¢'al education of the ntassrrs. Revolutionary
propaganda was a reliable weapon of the Communist
Party in the period of preparationand implementation of
the armed reprisal in 1917 as well as on all other conse-
que nt stages of the Socialist construction. Propaganda of
Marxism-Lcninism acquires special imponancc in the
circumstances of sharpening ideological struggle and
class struggle in the inremariomrl arena. The Communist
Party of the Soviet Union is constantly perfecting the
methods of propaganda.
As we see. everything is rather logical. consistent and -- most
important -- perfectly honest; translated from the Soviet newspeak
into passable English, :he two definitions above mean the following:
a) within the USSR or any territory under Soviet control, APN
"intluences" masses of populate to aocepl the conditions estabishcd
bY the Party unquestionably and work without strikes or protests.
Ideologically Novosti works towards STABILITY. b) "in the inter-
national arena" i.e. in foreign country which are notyet included in
the sphere of Soviet imperialism. Novosti Press Agency functions as
a factor of DESTABILISATION and destnrction ofaecepted moral
values through encouraging CLASS AND I IDEOLOGICAL
STRUGGLE.
lt could not be any simpler' Both of these functions of Novosti
Press Agency are evident if one reads the official APN Charter,
translating the paragraphs of the Charter from the "newspeak" into
normal human language. Here is an example of such a translation:
 10

Official Tex! of the Charter #dull meaning

l`hc Novostt Press Agcucy The Novosti Press Agency
(A PN) is an information agon- (APN) is an extension of Agiz-
cy of Me Sovici public organi- prop Dcpartmcnl of the Cen-
sauons. operating under Armi- tral Commiucc. cstabiished for
clcs l2> and 126 of the Consti- propaganda. subversion and
lution of the USSR. ilatclligcncc gathering.

No Soyiel Slate organ bears Posing as "independnn1`\ the

responsibility for the business APN is in fact a direct and
activities and financial obliga- subordinate extension of the
uions or any otheractions ofxhe Parry-Stale bureaucracy.
Agency. Nor does the agony which removes from itself any
bear responsibility for any responsibility for knowingly
claims against the Soviet Slate illegal or imorai actions of the
or any other Sovia organisa- APN.
lion.

The Agency pursues the aim of The Agency facilitates. in the

facilitating in every possible way of propaganda. the im-
way :he pramotinn and conso- plememation of' the USSR
Iidation of imematinnal un4er- leadership's internal and
standing. confidence and foreign policy. using indoctri-
friendship. nation and coercion on one
hand. and inciting hatred and
class struggle and terrorism on
the other.

... widely circulating abroad In the USSR: slandering and

:rue Lnformation about Me downgrading everything
Soviet Union and acquainting Ioncign if not under Soviet
the Soviet public with the life of domination.
other peoples. Abroad; presenting selected
and censored half-truths glori-
fying the Soviet way oflifc. dis-
information.
 11

... exchanges information Sllowerlng foreign cuunlnies

material ... on Lhc basis of with Marxist propaganda.
reciprocity.. while banning :very foreign
newspaper. periodical or book
within Me USSR.

Its aim is not lo make profit __ . Unlimited budgeting of the

sponsoring public organisa- Agency by the Stale-Party dic-
tions participate in financing tatorship. absolutely unac-
the Agency countable to any public organic
zation or private individual
whatsoever. The annualbudget
is around 2.4 billion dollars.

Enters into C¢)11l2,Cl and con- Forcing agency; malarial upon

cludes agreamcnls with both foreign Meedla free nl' charge,
state-owned and cooperatively- mare often PAYING In the
and privately owned (Ioreign) media for pnhl ications
. nl' the
media . . . to supply them with APN nm. orusing"every pos-
Agnnry mnlorizll for in All sible way" I.e bribery,
PROPRIATF FEE. bllcirmail, mrmplinn, drun-
kenners

There is no pain: in going into technical details of the Novosti

Charter. What is important here. and what will be demonstrated in
further chapters at the book. is: despite Me masquerade as a "public
and non-government". the APN can not be anything else but an
organ of MONOPOLY PROPAGAN DA. an extension ofsubver-
sinn apparatus of the Patty. 'Rte functions and aims of the APN can
not he anything else but those of forming public opinion by the
methods. which even in the "fascist" rightist dictatorsh ips are under-
stood as v IOLATING HUMAN M IN D. It can not be otherwise in
the satiety where "The party is our consciousness" and where "The
Party and the People are the one."
The on ngcr of mono poly propaganda could hardly be overestima-
ted. A Swiss amhm Peter Sager in his research on Novoslils activity
in India arrives at the follnwingdelirNtioll ofmononoiypropaganda'
"Propaganda is the atmnpt to convince n granteror Inecor
group of people of the justice of one's own opinion
(whether ideology, philosophy of life or religion.: helifls)
through n consciously onesided description nrt data nr
events. It is not necessarily bound to any lwn-th-nlar pnli-
 t2
till regime. In so far as II works towards spreading
opinions by mnvidinn and not by force. it is tised in
democratic countries ss well as by dictatorships.
As long as prnpngonda represents one opinion out of
many and ac eepts nr wen encourages the existence of its
rivals, its onesidedn is is entirely legitimate. Indeed. pro-
pagnnda oflhls kind provides the basis for the free forma-
tion of opinion. It promotes discussion and iS conse-
qtlently s dizracteristic of' demnrrnry.
But when propaganda monopolies the opinion-
making function and all counter-prnpagpnda is exelu-
ded, so that in the effect the expression of one opkiinn
provides Ibo only source of information _ then it is
imposing itself by force.
Monopoly propagpndn is an inescapable duraeteristie
of' dictatorship.
During In cxislcnoc the Novosti Press Agency clearly demonstra-
ted itself as an efficient organ of monopoly propaganda. Together
with the KGB, APN successfully "excludes" (destroys) not only"all
counter-propaganda", not only information, but the very sources of
than information in several cases, including foreign sources, such as
Radio stations broadcasting in Russian language, certain newspa-
pers, public organisations and individuals.
Many open socicti 9-. lived through many painful processes of re-
evaluation of traditional social values. In many parts of the world
good will, common sense had retreated and yield ed to the agar-es silo
advance of the system based on hatred, terror. "class struggle" etc.
Western media diseovc rod numerous "conspiracies" in every possible
level of authority in the free world from president lo local police.
But the main source of discontent totalitarian egression. and its
ideological from -- Novoati Press Agency. escaped thecritical anem-
tion of public opinion. The APN and is Kremlin owners remain
respectable and accepted. The APN publications. booklets. posters.
cartoons. newspapers. meetings. etc. - have unrestricted freed om in
Amy open society* PROVO K ING DFSTABI LlSATlON"of the very
open society. With the dawning of "detcnle" policy, Novosti has
greatly increased its activity both at home and abroad.
why this is happening? Let historians and psychologists answer
this question. The author of this book. a former Novosti employee.
lakes upon himself to explain HOW it is done and how does it feel IO
be a part of subversive system. while inwardly disagreeing both with
the dimly methods and "final aims" of Novosti Press Agency.
 13

Novosti headquarters, Moscow, Pushkin square

*\I I
8

"Soviet Pre \ - the moss lsuthrul In the world"

 14

novosn FROM ROOF TO BASEMENT, THINGS

AND PEOPLE IN BETWEEN
My lust encounter witltthe Novosti building us in April of 1959.
1 was in my second ycsrat the Institute oI'Oricnta1 Languages. Mos-
cow State University. A friend. Herman Bclousomhad invited me to
join him fOr a recording session in me studio or what was their oh:
SovinlOrm Bureau. l was lo play the guitar. for a propaganda
program the: would be broadcast to Indonesia.
Herman had been a student al the same institute, whom I met
when a participant in one of the amateur artistic acnvlues which are
all but compulsory in such places. He was a talented singer with a
genius for languages: tall. and of dark complexion. he had large
brown eyes. With these qualilications he was bound lo be popular:
his only problem wasdrink. in which he somctirncs immerse himself
t`or several days.
I had known Herman only bnelly when I discovered that his
drinking was the symptom Ola dtllctcnl problem. He had loved and
lost. So Indonesian did he appear. that he had been the natural
choice to "'inliltl'ate" an Indonesian delegation which was attending
an international movie festival in Moscow, as its interpreter. There
ht: met Tutti, an Indonesian movie star. by his account chttrmingand
delicate; simple. honest and as yet unspoiled. Their love had been
deep and mutual. said he. after hall bottle of vodka ... The KGB
summoned him, 10 say. categorically. that they did not approve of
inlcrmarriage between Soviets and Indonesians. this in spite of the
fact that a Sino-Soviet "split" had rcccnlly occurred, and I indonesia
was almost the only "brotherly country" soviet commentators could
identify in the Orient. Perhaps actual marrtagc to an Indonesian
would carry the stigma of incest.
My reaction was confused. I had thought bclorcthnt the beautilitt
talk about fricndshi p and cooperation between the proletarians ofall
countries might in fact be nothing but: but I was a member of the
Young Communist League. son off stallllcolonel. raised an loyzI tty. I
had seen Soviet movies in which innocent Soviet citmcns were sub-
verted by beautiful movie stars who turned out to be L`lA; who look
military secrets and then hoarsely laughed in their victims' faces.
blowing smoke from Camel cigarettes. I had been taught than love
and sex in the Wcsl alre merchandise. I utti was from the Orient ...
Even to 1 felt uneasy.
 I

vertical quarlsc-wava antenna

capable 01 imacepnng qovernmen:
Iimouainn communiceions

_..._ ,...|.

I 119 h- heq ueflcy an je in!

leaned on "
communicalnon facilites

SOVIET EMBASSY

088 l'brl\

KG.B's %4ln'al mark: l.i1~lln l»lfnr num-audwInimmjuuphlu :Mir

I
.
I..
P
44's |I| P

s
54 éwgii an

>'4'°I

Most of the eleetronit

snooping is dung by the
Novosti-KGB personnel

So near atoaSnvieusnsunlate In San Francisco

 16
I earned to forgive drunkenness and rudeness in Herman. for
underneath l found soflnoss and undemanding. We were ulill
sobering uP after u rude evening when we made our broadcast for
Sovinform. and I was hoping that thousands of miles away. at least
on this occasion. Tutti would be listening to Radio Moscow.
#sa4=#=r#4r

The Novosti building. in Pushkin Squa re. Isa rectangle enclosing a

courtyard. The only gate to that yard adjoins a side street. which
separates Novosti and the editorial oilioes of the "New Times. " The
gate is well secured: behind it. sheer metal deflects idle viewing.
In the long corridors. there arc those who speculate about the
building's history. Prior 10 the Bolshevik Rcvolutionit was.accord-
ing to one school. a prison for very special guests: according to
another. an elite school for Okhrana's spies. Afterwards, it was
appropriated by the Cheka. the Bolshevik Secret Poliee.and later. a
school for foreign revolutionaries. under the Cornintcrn. During the
Great Patriotic W 1r(theSovict description of World War II). Sovin-
form moved in. Novosti Press Agency was founded in 1961. awhirl
of Krushchev on the advice ofr his son-in-law. Sovinform disap-
peared. or to be more precise, it melted in.
Accurate or .1101.. the story conforms Io an impression that the
building was always the most suitable place for the shady affairs of
our Empire. which are not for the masses' eyes. The building is a tan-
gible monument to State Secrecy. Let's divulge some of it.
The roof is a forest of antennae, receiving all possible telex and
wire services, they are not paid for. This is not as unfair as it may
appear. Igor news from Reuter. AP. UPI and AFP (unless it is bad
news for the West) never appears Ln the Soviet press. only on the
desks of nomenklalura of the media. Nor should Novosti bethought
the only perpetrator oI this little theft: mosl Soviet embassies are
provided with similar equipment. (A radio technician could easily
figure out what they are tuned to by studying the configurations of
the antennas)-
On the top floor. on the north side of the Novosti rectangle. are the
teleprinters. They occupy their own large department, separated
from the translators and typists next door by a huge pkxiglass we II.
with sliding doors and a remotely controlled lock (manufactured,
incidentally. in the United States). A milkbox opening exists,
through which manuscripts and messages are passed for transmis-
sion abroad. Must Novosti employees are denied access; means of
communication with the outsideworld do not belong to the people of
Novosti.
 11
l rrutnaged lo enter once, for I was on good terms Wtlh one l yawn
Dzendrhinskyi (no relation to due great cltuteluine of Lubyanka. as
far as I know). I lurid met him inN-v Delhi. Already sn trusted person
herr. he was Irving his we up the Contuomol totem pole. Under
his jurisdiction were several huge gray instruments. resembling the
field radios Soviet privntee uffeelionitely all `°wl\Ila°1. they were in
m

eonaoka. stacked and separated by television screens. across which

patterns of green day and daune moved. comprehensible only to
him. These were in the maintenance room uljoiningthe main hallo
teleprinters. There l saw about IM of the eantankorous machines.
muuutetl upon llbks in long rows. Most appeared to uanemitar. well
as revive messages. The operator: would feed them with rolled strips
of Key1Jutu:ll.ed paper. Today. thanks to generous computer rules
from the U.S. ad Japan. the equipment Must be greatly imprewd-
1

An iron duut would need to be unloekorl. if one were to exit the

hall of teleprinters and enter the upper sltory°s east side. It starts with
a spooky lire-exit staircase. where Novosti loafer smoke and gossip.
Beyond lt lks the GLAYLIT room. the censors. perhaps the same
two old men and the fat lady I lint saw in 1969. They pored over e
copy with red pencils. frequentlyermsulting large manuals. the litera-
ry prod ucllons of he KG B. In these would be el14raeterir.ed. by wb-
ject. the son Of lnfomtatlon which in "not in accord with state securi-
ly." Real wages. for Instars.
Bcyorvd the censors\ room is a movie ramjet:tiunbl°s cubicle. amel-
llng ul' garlic and Moskovskaya vodka. Nadya-Vuaya is l.he been
and the main consumer of Moskowkaya. 'Through the projection
apperwtes uncle Yasya can sec what gum on in the ¢ulll`en:rlcc-and-
movie hall. Most of' it is or no incitest 10 uncle Vusyu. but in fastsitru-
(ed me greatly. Hen press conferences were held for Western L'ul les-
pondenl.; lsaw cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin here once. unwilling w say
anything which was not uMtten on cue cards bcfone him. In large
letters. Miklmil Shoiokhov showed up hen after his return from
Oslo with a Nobel prize for stolen novels. He. too. was unable no
either speak or read. for he was frightfully drunk. I wonder what
foreign television correspondents made out of that "in\erview."The
Soviet ambassador 10 India. comrade Bencdiewv. talked to the
cream of' Novostr here. trying to explain the absence of logic in
Stalin's dauglher" delectton from intlia. which he failed lo prevent.
poor fellow. Party ineetmgs are sometimes held neut. too. They
would be of no interest to the Weslem reader unable to appreciate
George Orwell. or better. bwlllcr Strugatzki3 Falk of the Ti'llalerlrI
Commission (Trqrka - escaped the Soviet censors. probably by
posing as science Iiction).
Western movies (made m the West) are also shownmccasionally.
 18
and to a select audience of Novosu employees, their families and
Mme friends employed by s-olklqre Sum bureaucnaeka. such as
TASS. Radio Moscow. we vda. etc. Here | saw Nevil Sltulcb at H!
Beach. and Is it con lilscd. like my colleagues. unable Lu unrlct stand
the omission from in of anti-Soviet rhetoric. A Sovtct movie about a
nuekar war would be full ofanu-western accusations. lr would allow
horrible war stokes too. and thus did nOt (ABC's "Day After" Ilan
changed that omission recently ...1. Human emotions were pul-
lraycd. which a Soviet version would distort. More confusion was
created by "The Nuremberg Tri:tls"' only an iolot woul0 fail no see
the resemblance between the Nazi delenOantsr twllo were at kana
nwciving a fair trial) and thou who occupy corresponding positions
of power in the Soviet Union.
II have often ptnvzled over the motive for showing these movies,
knowing from oxpcrklwt that our systcttl always has an ulterior
motive. Was it intelkctoal lonure? Wax it a testing ground. to rind
out if those who will visit the West can return with their hypocrisy
intact?l
From the conference hall. through a reception area. onecnters the
liblllh aside. It had o long corridor. and on its doors or lind the names
or the wulld':~ political and geographical regions The wnrlrl is sliced.
like u meltm. into segmental. and the respective Novosti ttepnrnnents
gnaw al their sham. working for the ulrimau victory of Com-
mimism; to winplelcly devour ull of' mankind. I wnrkeN in the
department fur South-Eau Asia. which in typical of all time Mpari-
mcms. II lrrda to the iwkvloglcal needs. as defined by the Politbu-
icau. of llxliu. Burma. Thailand. LiMo. Cambodia. Vkuwim. Malay-
ada. IndoInniiu. the Philippines. Pakistan and Ceylon
Down the corridor we pass Africa. Latin Arllericn. and several
ollicr dcwluping areas. My big boss. TM editor ol'South Asia. would
be found al. mln: end of' Me corridor: Valery Pushkav. a modest and
dillgcnr clm11ulk upon whose [nee us written indelibly the neticcnt
expansion ul' a boy who had been caught masturbating
Along the western corridor of' the upper floor there are several
other room; For several other bosses of various parts of the north.
each or tlreui with his own facial peculiarity.
Finally. we get to the northwest corner. occupied by the editorial
board ol"'S<wict Land" magazine. printed and distributed in India is
an cxprceisiun ul' brotherly concern for the idedogicnl upbringing of
our Indian friends. A dispropenionme amount of the work (every-
thing but the uuirsktion into local languages and printing) wasdnnc
in Moscow. I worked on the periodicll from December 1965 In
March tear. I was chosen for my task. the writing of economic

.n is 11..-.. -am
 19
stories. for my qualifications; I h~ d been at translator for the soviet
economic ald group which conilructW t1:I'incrics an Kuyatli and
Baruunl. Soviet monuments In India. I can spark I-limli and Uttlu.
Besides. while on my first assignment to India. I was a "vulunlury"
distributor of "Soviet Und" magnjnc among the Indian workers Ill
the l¥O!Hil\'\lCII0\\ projects
As we walk to Me north sldc ohm rectangle. we see at tylrisls' hull
on one sldc. , translation department on the other. The typists I'ttll
into three categories: unmarried. divorced and septtnutsd. They are
med by an austere Madame.
The tmrctlators are ofvarlous agcsmexesand nationalities. Many
are the oltspring or foreign communists who came to the Soviet
Umorr in search of the Brightest Future tor All Mankind. but found a
status d nth-vvulszlnoi (non-exitahlel for themselves. their children.
and their chlldrelfs children: thcv s have lost the res
| oh: to return lo
whence they came. they saw the umeponed side of' Soviet life.
Some were recent graduates of foreign language schools. Atten-
dance had become possible under Krusltchev. prior to whom the:
learning of a torergt language was considered the first step towards
high treason. `Iltey make routine translations. into broken English.
of the Central Committee memhers'speeches.articlesin Pravdtt.and
statements by cosmonauts and ballerinas.
We return to the teleprinters. or mthcr to their plexiglass shield.
and find a staircase to ~»~~- nd to the lhtrd floor.
Vu 4

Let's tiptoe lo the highest otlicc of Novustl. past the reception area
where at tigress of a secretary is purring something into a high fre-
quency telephone. Boris Burkov. the director worked in an empo-
rium of souvenirs [rom many count mies. selected with all the taste of
tltcjokes he made tO visitors. which I was sometimes compelled to
translate (Comrade Burkov blamed the translator if his guests did
not laugh. so l had to compensate for the lack of humor with devia-
lions from the original.) Six southern and six eastern windows light-
ed his menage. whkh included a meeting table. a small desk with
numerous telephones. some matching chairs. further dtairs around
the wall and by the windows. and shelves for his unopened books.
The telephones were ordinary. high frequency. and verrushka.
(scramblcrl lo contact the elite of nomenkiaturu and the Kremlin. A
little door. as if to a closet. led in fact to another room with shower.
beth and couch. here he would retire after an excess of toasts to
international friendship and cooperation. Lunch. with vodka. would
be brought lo him here by an special waitress from the special Novosti
kite hen in the basement. It was hard to respect Comrade Burkov. for
he reminded me of Gorki°s play "on the Bottom"; it was as if he had
 zo

A delegation or "progre§5!ve" forelgncrs visiting Novosfi.

Under numbers: l.comrad¢ Lalehlkov. 2.vllerl Pushlwv,
3.Tomas Schuman, 4.Comrade Yasmin (Central Commlttee of
Communist Party, USSR)

Congregation of "useful idiots" boozing with Novus!! top

brass. Sitting at head of the table: Boris Burkov, APN
Chairman. I am standing next to the Indian poet.

anil*

44
 21
floated up no the surlitce. and there was something unclean about
him. His gcstum were anilicinlly friendly, even when dnmk com-
rlde Burkov lalved lo play democracy and egalite. I didn't trust him.
but m~ ny foreign delegates did. l understand that he ~= again
several years ago.
Comrade Zaichikov. the deputy director. was among my favorites
in the Novosti brass. His room us right across from Burkovls. I
often visited him with crowds of foreign "pi-ogzessive* scavengers.
who would shamelessly ask Comrade Zaicbikov for everything from
an Aerosol ticket to Paris to lnuunent at the Kremlin clinic to cure
their YI) and hemiars acquired in the unequal struggle against
Wester imperialism. Comrade Zaichikov would patiently listen to
them. and his face and hands would cover with perspiration. He
would wipe them before shaking hands with the visitors. but the
sound of' a loreiun language would make him sweat all the more
profusely. Comrade Zaichikov was shy person. Vodka was another
CBIISC of his condition. I suspected that Zaichikov had. somewhere
imitlc him. some son of conscience. You see. he was a war veteran,
missing pan ofonc kg. As the son off professional soldier. I respect-
ed rnnse who had sutTered in the war. I knew better than many that in
mnlily many Soviet military personne1are"dova."Thc "hawks"are
:he fat appararchikx. who hide in aireonditioned bunkers and make
long speech at world p~ ~ce conferences. Tall. skinny. and useetic.
rrxaepl for an Incongruous pair of French eyeglasses. Comrade
Yxiehiktw was. in my eyes. a dove attacked by swarms of the hawks.
Snmelintcs I wished I had I shotgun.
Alnngthc corridor of the east side. class walls reveal the off -»: of
the Pearly. trade union. and young Communist bosses In one
rreqnenriy Satan Odessa Jew called Pkhchik.a membcrofthe direc-
lm-inl hoard who hitd found his way along the Party line of least
resistance. whose black eyes radiated tiredness and a certainty that
someday things will improve. I came to him fore signature whenever
my base disappeared and I had something lo be tmrumitted abroad.
He would ask me to tell him what is was about. and sign ttnithout
leading, hardly noticing the absence ofacensorship stamp. Then he
would rein hock into the shadows. by an imported air conditioner.
and eonlinue no struggle to remain awake.
pest n staircase (the same spooky one) is the karroaeka. or file
room. Arolllld in walls are shelves of files. in the middle. two Ther-
mofax machines (the Socinlisl Xerox] prodII0¢ pink-brown copies of
Novosti articles. to be registered with ntbber stamp and code num-
ben. indexed. nurnmarillid and entered in larrte books bydalc. sub-
ject and amhrsr. with further copies to be distributed to other propa-
gnnda nrganx. raaummarized. l~eatalol:ued.atnd lied. Theoriginel is
reproeeeeed for separate tiling. Nothing is lost. nothing is findable.
Of that two phrrnp. slow girls take em.
"Reeomendatlon letter" -- a "must" in ¢1reryone's file with
the Personnel Department.
xlnxtnlcxlu.
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Navosli' ldmtiiy Card. prob d' the
ansence of any lnlemlmy - 1-vll» is and
llonssly had been hare MM In flue
spedsl aepartlul:nt' In exchange for
this rl4-ecweml card which opens
more dome In the Inner in the
'Amlrk.n lfsprnf rrulit card.

22
 23
Several Marc editorial looms grace ll1c our ill »idc ul' lln: lllild
ll0or. `llbl:se serve the English spuzIling uuuulIiua. llle Ulliled King-
dom and Ireland. lhc Uiiiltd Slulesund Canada. Aunualia and New
zealand.
The wcsl side has doors which mold "Oulsillcls Kr.-cp OuL' Bchinll
these doors an :we depanmenls. me "first de1nlrlml:II1" and the
"speeia!."Tlley conmlii me thi: him o1'cveryS¢wicl mWiii agency. or.
more preelaaely. me bladder.
In Mc "flrst.'°:lli messages hciween Novosd and mc Ccnual Com-
mlllee are kept. A special courier wlllarriw al :he main entrance Ina
black Ilinltfa car. He is generally a skinny and pimpled young man.
with :no rank of Junlor lleulenam of the special CC Guards. The
lienlenzlnl will he chained lo n briefcase. Hcwill nm h~ ac the key. but
he will have a handgun to defend the secrecy of enrnespondcnce
between me Slate and lm: "indepenaenn public" news agency. He
tell not say a word m the elevator.
in me "special department". on the contrary_the secrecy ofoorres-
pondencc is vtolnted. and by the same stale. the correspondence.
though. Is that of the Nov~ ~ti stall. A ntcc lazy girl was working
there. the last time I peeked through the door. Her job was lo open
the mail. whether personal or profe~ ~ional. and make copies of
interesting |¢ll¢|'S-
Next. door. down the oorndor. Is llle personnel department,
guarded by retired KGB. A fintprool safe section contains the per~
sorrel tiles. In these the drplotnns of stall members arcslored, Inge-
ther with every kttcr of recommendation. memorandum. reprnnand
or other clue to our professional cxrstcnoe. The prize document is n
52-pan questionnaire (the anker). on which you have answered
every conceivable question about yourself. lzvcn your mstdzs are
known to the personnel deportment' your ltlc tncludcs x-nys. But
the moss important document in each persorltlslrlels hlsobjlecrh'ka. a
two- or thleopage compilation of the most subjective opinions -
those of KGB informers. Every department will lurve at least one on
these creatures.
A section of the personnel department is called vo.|wmf.rro!f(mili-
:ary desk) and guarded by a bdiushka. with military induction
tickets for all members of the staff who are also reservists. l. for
instance. was an officer of the reserve. and when Iras assigned to
India. babushka made a telephone call. l wtls told to report for
retraining. to a arms near Moscow. lt took me a wack of negotia-
tions and commuting between my Novoltii boris. rroenkamal and lhc
babushka. to prevent my "rcqrnlil1¢atlon.'° Even when I had a ticket
to New Delhi. the omnipotent Defense Ministry. through its
babushka. trod to send me to Ethiopia Asa translator for the Soviet
military "advisors." what saved me from that wasasprar-ka.certil'y-
 24
ing the my trainingwu in Indian languages. which are not spoken in
Ethiopia. But who cares ... now?
French. Germain and Scandinavian services are provided on the
south aide of the third floor. There is also a section ol'Commun1ca-
lions and a room for telephone operators. whoscjob in was to make
high-frequency connections. sometimes abroad. usually to Party
nlliciala. If Novouli guide are showing; foreigner around the Soviet
union. the communications would be busygettingmcssagies through
to uhelocal Party oliias. warninzthcm locker up in preparation for
the Inrnign delegation. There must be panty of vodka. and good
food: Igor mads must be swept and fences painted: drunltards
remowurl from gutters: collective farms made so look eflicknl. And
put a grand piano in the park and someone to play it. preferably B
worker.
The second floor is not very intercatinll- Its north side houscstcch-
nical and administrative xrvioes. lone is takings foreigner to lunch
one comes here m arrinlt coupons for taxis. credit in II good restau-
mm. and a memo for the accounting dellarlment, which will provide
some cash to throw around. Tickets For planes and trains are also
reserved here.
Walking briskly down the east side's corridor we pats the photo-
suvrlw department. This is really another filing system, with an
inexhaustible stead nl' pictures lo illustrate the acltkvemettls of the
Socialist Motherland.
Countless photographs with negatives are filed here. of every
ooneeivabk occasion. hm essentially bearing the same message.
Readers who have wondered how it is that. as socialism triumphs in a
country. its people begin in smile with an empty Wt eiemd opti-
mism. might addmse their inquiries lo this section. Whether in
Havana. Belgrade. peking or Harare. one thing you can say for
socialism. everybody loves it in the um: w.y. This phenomenon
should be a mann of research for psychologists.
Countries already nnjnying socialism are served DY the editorial
departments of the south and west sides. The material produced hens
may no be as subik as that produced for the third world. hut there `~
newnhelosc a sobering rrnewigr you live beautifully and securely.
and if you behave. we may nnl have no "liberate" you again with our
tanks.
A deloont lo the ground flnnr will he accompanied bY the smell of
pirozhki and yesterdays eabbagesnup. form cafeteria and dininghlll
are on either sided' the btiildingk lobby. Lot's walk out. and see if we
can get back in.
L\rs° glass doors greet the vieitnr at me main entmncc: :adept for
two grey-uniformed Ser tri-. linking quaintly like dftoersin Hiller's
army. ¢}»e building too k: me approachable here than anYwhere.
 25
The senuias ask for your pass. they will send stall borne who are
without one. A visitor must explain his business canetully, for the
sentry wilt call the person he wisher to see, :my only if tlte twostorics
agree wiunbepossibtutor the visllorloemer.'Ilhe aentricsarctttired
KGB. probably demoted for missing a quota - of arrests. perhaps.
On their faces is written a boring expression - "htteen ymrs ago I
would hut shot you."
novosti is by no means the most difficult building in Moscow to
sneak into; tryvisitingthc Central commlnnee in Norina Square. For
intermediates t mga: the telegraph agency TASS. or the Moscow
Radio building. 'there the guards are internal police. and visitors
dlcck in as tl to Ioretgn country. Your pass is your visa: half an hour
or more can be spent. (usually standing) waiting for the gentlemen
behold a brick wall (with one brkk missing) to process it. make out
an extra :slip of' paper. and call your mme.
Back 10 Novosti. To eitherside of the lobby. the corridors display
Sovlet personalities and acltievcments. Smiling milkmaids. thought-
lul nuclear physicists and dumb eoneeitcd Party off'cialssharcspnee
on the walls with charts of the incitase of something. probably the
number of people who have been *agitated and provoked"by Novos-
ti vr°l»=¢*"\¢=-
'lilking the left corridor. we come lo the cafeteria. whet. if we
have some money left before the next puluthka, we may have
some beer. Drinking to excess in the cafeteria is not advisable for
Novasti staff: it gives the informers too easy at job. On the other
hand. drinking lo excess is common in Novosti. out of botlks con-
cualed in filing cabinets. pockets and bottom drawers. A foreign
colleagtx of mine once remarked how much water seems to be
drunk by Noyosli stnffin the mouing: ...
Auntie Ycsu is not only the atle\eriels patron saint. but its
manager. Her jovial. and substantial. presence accounts for no
small pan of' the morale in this tomb of journalism. II is often
suggested than she steals food: which `~ ~. in Russia. some sort of
backhanded cornpiimcnl. for everyone who works in cafeterias
:steals food. Stealing is an essential part of a planned eco-
nomy.
Returning our empty bottles. and patting back for each the 12
kapecl' deposit. we may round the corridor to the west side of the
ground Iloor 8nd to the Basra --» cash-box. It is from this tiny room.
with a tinier reception area. that foreign "Drogressiws" are
paid their thirty silver pieces for contributing; to the ticstruction of
their native "decadent capitalh»t" motherlands. and for printing
tht: truth about the Motherland of' S0¢laliam" - the Sovid
Union. Mos! Nike iz mccklyz some hawk lhc nerve no compkun
oo `
that the number of pieces is unoquat to their number of' ams of

.......
 2s
truth. A few Luke money on the promise lo write in their native
countries :he glories they have neon. and few of these fail to ddi-
ver. But UIC Really important contributor: from abroad have
their money taken to them. by persons of approximately equiva-
lent rank. Future prime ministers and chiefs of civil serving dis-
dain to be seen by kssrr mtm qucucring outside of Nowasti ash
windows.
SU1L I have seen tlisliuguiahed personas here. for instance Ravi
Sh~ nkar Revel. a painter from India: the poo! Ali Sardar
Jain: another poet. and admin: or Lenin. Sumitratmmdatn
Punt: lliswas. editor of I-Ivmim Bazaar Parrit-a; A.S. Raman.
editor of lfrunhal' Murtrated. Narayanan. editor of the daily
Patriot. My cnlleagucs [mm English-speaking countries told me
that Mr. !t.i.m phllby himself uitcn sncukod hen: "Incognito" to
collect his lee l'nr ctitlsullillgtiervitxs rcndcrcll to Novonti thzoughthe
Disinformation Dcpnnment of' KGB. Many unsuccessful jour-
nulists and writers from the West tlttd East. North and South.
end up in the queue. fkllte1tsd. ul too cynical to care that their
books are primed in millions of copies in the USSR. when circu-
lation is never an indicator of' popularity. (lt is astablithutt
"from above' by Asl1pt°n-J Tit: log buuka of 1Ith little room could
say a lol about a mllter large lluutbcr of otherwise respectable
neoPje.
be
A dispatch olhoe for truck and or drivers is further along the
wcsl corridor. by the arch which lends into the counyord. Behind it
:here are several large rooms occupied by the printing facilities
for Novosli d~ ~ily bulletins. for both domestic and foreign con-
sumption. The rest of the floor is too bm ing lo investigate. So. these
are the four Floors of' the Novosti building. but Thu it not all.
There is a rather interesting hllscmenl. Follow mc. please ...
II am take an elevator. which ix usually done only by "special"
waitresses and some bosses. we on get right into a "speeinL
close" restaurant pmviaca for Nuwati nwmwklrmam and descr-
ying foreign guests ( those who do not work -- for APN. will not
cut. - a socialist quotation from the Bible).
The restaurant looks like a replica of a smell decadent
stctik house somewhere In New York; high-back chairs and
benches divide the table urea into cozy hoolln. soft lights. soil but
prognssiw Socialist-rcnlistlc musle emauutcs from concealed
speakers: unobtrusive uitrestsee and lilsl. class food from the
Central Committee reserves.
I uuuol to lake quiic a number of run.-ign guess: here. to wan
their truthful sloncs about our classy-an society. Noi u single lib
lehisl whore. which munching on II: "pi:oplcls" caviar. usdced the
Novosti hoszs anon me sham diacrcpancy bezwwn food hero
27

December |967. Plcum: by .IOIm Philby

Cambridge, 1033: Maclean fm 418411) him the second rank of the Peace
arc 28
 as
and in the "poople'c" roslaunmts (which any one of them could
visit. if they wanted). Have the heroic Soviet people not descry
decent food after single-handedly defeating Nevis. conquering
Space and liberating Afrlea? I never stopped puzzling over the
unique ability of my progressive observers not lo observe things
*un\ypica1'° for my wonderful motherland.
From the restaurant. located in the south wing of the buse-
ment. we may turn to the west by a corridor and enter a roomy
medical section. where employees of' APN have their insides regis-
tered On x-rays and are treated for' the traumas they acquire in
their heavy struggle against the ideological diversions of' the
West.
The westcm tunnel abruptly ends before huge: airtight door,
leading. I was told. into as fallout shelter provided for. Ict's say.
some Soviet journalists in coat of nuclear strike. At ii1>L the
cxialcncc of Lhcac shelters seemed m mc at sign of' paranoia in out
leaders. but I learned from a friend of mine. an employee of the
Futcigu Affnita Ministry. lltal it is 111u1c ul' as caluulalcd plural-
rnliott for war.
One day, while cnlcring u Moscow metro station. we saw a
cam of wortcm laboring over huge airtight gales. half a meter
thick. made of swell and wncrctc. which in an titivated. wnlcal
monition could completely cut off the metro station l'rom the
entrance tuba As I mmemhcr. it was just before the Cuban missile
crisis. I expremd my suspicion to my friend that our democratic
junta was probably providing us with shelters in case president
Kennedy ordered a strike against Moscow in exchange for
Miami.
not us. said the future diplomat. even the entire Moscow metro
system cannot possibly shelter all eight million Moscwites. Thc
gales are not to protect people from radiation.. but to protect
nomenklalura l`rom a panic stricken Itood of' people.
Soviet media of that period was hysterical with laughter
about stupid Americans paying hundreds of thousands of
dollars lo build their individual family bomb shelters. Some
Soviet magazines. like the illustrated Ugonyok and Krokodii,
primed photographs or the shelters with sarcastic captions.
explaining that some Americans stock these shelters with canned
lows. electric batteries and loaded rlt let -- to protect themselves
not from the enemy. but from their neighbors. less fortunate prole-
tarlans. Icll shclterlcss above. My nerd cxplamed to me that to
every Soviet solidrrri olliec. in one of its endless departt'rlents,there
sits u modest bureaucrat, pushing insigmlreant but already
secret papers. Hts real tunciton is that of an *early warning
radar system." In case of a nuclear war, he (or she) will receive
 30
HH innocent telephone call. and someone will mention a code-
word ph1ase. maybe something like *the swallows are coming
hack lo Yalla'° or "Auntie Shoora sends her best regards to
Penal." 'Dial will trilzll:r the evnmnilkm operation. The cork
will own his fate. produce a sealed envelope. tar it open. and
call evenfonc who is listed. on his switchboard. The selected few will
Wnik into an elev~ ~lor. as if lhcy had been called to another
un-edu-luniie. and peacclully go down to :he shelter. having the
reef no the ollioe blissfully unaware of the approaching missile. IO
roast in the nuclear G1e. Everything would be orderly and purely
scientific. Nn Inst-minute class struwe at the airtight doors. no
need for kliIllrxl rills ~nd canned foods ...
This much for the building. Let's get the hell out of the dams'
basement and walk into the sunlit prison-yard of Novosti. In
summertime the .yard is used by auntie Vera for her buffet. Under
the round L°o\or(llI Ilmhn'llal! then: alt lava plastic tables and
chair*. Sowsli folk flush sandwiches down with Zhiguii beer.
:Yu :¢furm'R'.'

Another noozing suasion with "progrusivr" guests ul Nuvuszl

 at

NOYOSTI "KITCIIEN", OR SHOULD WE SAY

"0UTI{0USE"?
Victorious Socialism. as claimed by the Soviet textbooks ol"`Poli-
tical-cconomy°'. had awa kcned tremendous. unprceedatted produc-
tivo forces in the society. and during a historically-short period of
time had demonstrated (to members of the Folitburcau) the obvious
advantages of the centralized planned economy over the so-called
"free market". plagued with inflation, stagnation. oppression.,
cxpldtation. and general overall crisis. It was explained to me in
childhood. that in the West the eapitalistsane so badly organised and
so greedy. that they prefer to burn wheat and pour milk into rivers.
rather than give it to the poor masses. it is called "twcrproduction".
At this point l was expected to [Oct class hatred: "Bloody bourgeois
scum! Milk into river! why nor bring some to Mytishchi'!"
in my Mottterland there is nodangcr oloverproductio n. that I can
witness after 30 years of socialist life. Shortages, but only as tempo-
rary complications of' rapid socialist growth. We may sometimes be
short of potatoes. bread. matches. shoelaces. shoes. coal. kerosene.
sheet iron. soap. strawberry jam, ballpens. living space. corn. wheat.
meat of the first category. meat of the second. simple men. et.
warm underwear Dmzhba (made in people°s China). winter coats
made in Cnchosluvakia. dry fish from anywhere - 'secondary°
untypical products. without which our nation has survived and even
made glorious achievements in space and Africa.
But not lot a single second in the history ofsocia Iisrn have we been
shun of propaganda. This semi-fluid we produce in abundance for
ourselves and for our foreign brothers.
The biggest ove rproduction ofpropaaanda can be observed within
Nmvosri. Where does it come from? How docs in colleen in the sewers.
travel along. ferment. and what kind of fertiliser docs it make" what
sort of Fruit grows on fields. sprinkled by our manure? Let us follow
the How of it from the very source.
Roughly speaking. there me three main sources of' propaganda
colkcled in Nowasli- I) "llpper" -- from Agizprfyn of the Pnrtyls
central commihen 2) "FxlernxI°' -- from lheSoviet mass-media mtl-
side APN. and from foreign media, huh progressive and reactiona-
ry. 3) "Internal" - whatever we excrete ourselves.
.Agirprqu develops ln.n8-lrrm and fnrlnighlly prnpnytnrla plan!
for the Soviet and foreign media, as well as key-points of' Marxist-
Leninis1 Dogma. asimerpreted by the present ideological elite. This
is for APN, Olll' "general line". Fven rho mnsl "indellendenl" and
mature propaganda makers mfr digest Agilprnph /ormuiir0vki
before giving [orrin
 32
Agitpropls plans arc brictCd \O the chief editors of Novosli during
regular meetings at the central committee. Enlightened. the ohMs
come Ln Novosri and bricfthe senior staff-department editors. etc.
These consequcnllv. clabotalc the plans in accordance with currant
events in their respective nccgra phical arena to march the "needs" of
specific natiorrs. In cases when current events stubbornly happen in
contradiction to the directives of the Kremlin. the dcpartmenfschiel'
whirr coordinate the flow and consistency ol' propaganda with the
Centmi Committee by phone.
"EAlt;nlal" sources can be subdivided into "domestic". "progres-
sive foreign" and "reactionary l'oreign'. Every ferrari day and minute,
the ITIOIIMIUIJS Soviet mas: media monopoly floods our country and
our ncighbouia with oceans of stinking semi-fluid. The :wrap
homo xmiwiw in uattd to the stench, and after three-quarters of a
century simply pztaacs it through hissystcm nsnom digestible Novos-
ti men arc uuitc atnutltel' matter. We distinguish smells. eoionrs con-
sistcneies and blcntl>. selecting the choicicst pieces, chew them
lovingly. and t:xcreLe new combinations and shapes.
My duly. for example. was to digest a pile of Soviet newspapers
and periodicals daily in scotch of three or four bits still edible. with
proper seasoning. for our developing brothers in the "Third We rid",
pay rticularly those on the httliau subcontinent. This type ofjobcnn be
trusted only to a comrade who has spent some time in India, is [Ami .
liar with the languages and nWa of' the country ant! who knows the
tastes and rnorcs of the population. Ttrua. for example. while picking
through n rhapsodic piece from Soviet magazine Ogorivok, l omit
references to hard iatbouring Soviet wunteu (on railway atnct con'
strucllon projects. etc.). so not to scare our tmttnancipatcd Islamic
ststcrs in Lucknow.
Another "domestic" source of raw prupagtutda is authors. out-
sidnzs. freelancers' professionals. bureaucrats or "intelligentsia" -
obr0:1n°ar1.u'hina.
Each A l'N editor is expected 10 have a circle of these ex pens in
various fields
Let us take. for example. a typical case. whenthc Cenirul Commit-
tee have decided to mark the glorious anniversary UtSoviet Puwu in
a Soviet Asian republic. Let us imagine also. that by coincidence one
of the largest newspapers in India (say. The Sraresmrm) has
expressed a desire to get from Novosti something about farming in
Uzbekistan. That of ten happens: to "balance" the Now or informa-
:ion from the west. editors of Indian papers will pick up a Soviet.
story. straight from the horse. as it were. Upon getting sober. our
man in Delhi will rmnnediately send tO Novosti Headquarters in
Moscow a tele x. :qi-'avka-request. suppose. the piece of paper falls
on my desk with comrade Malthotinls rea pencil mark: `pleuse. saiis-
 - ~I ...-, - v.:v.»~=n-.

33
ly'. My ltntact would be to call the Representation d' Uzbek SSR at
the Council of' Ministers of' the USSR. and request tltc minister in
charge. comrade. say. Gasanboekov, lo write for Novosti something
about the glorious aehievememsol' Uzbek people under the guidance
of the Leninist Central Committee.
Comrade Go nbeckov allows himself lo be talked into such an
important venture after half an hour on the telephone. He passes the
buck to his aide. who spends another two hours on the phone. raking
my dilation on the 'main points". lntwo or threewceks theanicleis
put on comrade Gttsanbeekok desk. Comrade Gasanbeekov may
even read some fit. before signing. and droppingin the "out" tray.
The arlkk travels with a special ministerial dispatch tO Novosti.
sometimes in a black Charka limousine. It becomes obvious that the
whole piece is illiterate. too long. and on ndilferent subject: methods
ofeotton crates-bmading. But Novosl.ils aneountsdepartmcm readily
issues a modest honorarium - about four hundred rubles - to
comrade Guartbeekov. lt is Ia trillc fore minister. but it pleasantly
tiekks his .uthor's ego and further strengthens brotherly tics
between Uzbek and Russian bureaucracies.
Sometimes. though. such an article is still born: eilherlhr: minister
is "Ont for the meeting at CC". or has a hangover. or his aide mispla-
our the note with "main points" and is :oo shy to call :ac again. In
other words. the opus docs not appear. and I notice steel in my boss's
glances in the mornings. In this ease I rewrite from a Tashkent local
newspaper Kommuniw Uzbek irwnv. add some details from the
Kazalthstan vane' Lenin Zhdv. salt and spices. mention Indira
Ghandhi's visit to Tbilisi and com ride Gasanbeckovlstrip to Punjab
last wear. retype in three copies. and send to the Representation of
Uzbek SSR. The aniek comes back with the precious doodle of'
comrade Gasanbeckov and the rest goes as above. including the
"modal" honorarium.
The opus must. of course. pass through censor. be coordinated
with Agitprop's teoent propaganda ulan. elc. By the end of the fourth
month it lands on the desk of the Statesman's editor in New Delhi
with a rubberstamp' "Exclusive [rom Novostl". Byth ttime. suffer-
1

in! throuzh the monsoon season. the editor is unable lo remember

why he ordered it.
Hate. to refresh his memory.comt:t the Novosti man in Delhi with
a bottle for a case. depending on the importance nl' llln tnpir) of
whisky. The stuff is printed with photos of smiling llzlrk fnrmrn.
provingthe unmistakble advantages ofSovietsoeiallstagrieultufe in
formerly backward Asian regions
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Vicious circle of Ile: a reprint of Nuvosii fabricnlion phn-

ted In a Canadian Communist tabloid - in Soviet "Pravda"_
s4
 35

ONE DAY IN 'runs Lll~E UF A NUVUSII

EMPLOYEE
7-00 n.m.
Heroically overcoming the headache - the result of wsterdayk
sneinliving with Ntwosti colleagues and our foreign "lklk brothers"
-- I wake Up in my nlnsret of n mnm in the communal apartment we
than: with another family. that of a worker who ntnkes parts for
spuutike ul a ertpnrvcrnl Etctnry in the neighhnring inwnship of
Podlipki. Trying not lo disturb the proletariat. or to awaken my
parents ("Wltcrl: were you so lute yesterday? Is it really neeesriary to
spend THAT much time with your colleagues?"), I tiptoe Io our
communal bathroom. My parent: sleeparrossthe corridor. Once in
the bathroom my concern is not to lint too loud. forourapanment it
far from soudproof.
After scanning through a Fhnvda editorial. 1 crumple the from
page of the most truthful newspaper in the world. Having tried lo
avoid imprinting myself with the large portrait ofeomradu Brezvhnev.
delivering another hirnoricul apceeh. I make sure it is discretely
flushed down.
7-20
In our communal kitchen I put the kettle on the stove to boil water
for we. Moanwhrlu I tiptoe to our communal bathroom and :pond
some time in front of' our communal mirror. puvzlod by the sight of
my own face and the obvious Incl of my existence. Shaving with a ll
Soviet-mudc Kharkov furor proves the fact even hrrlher. I go .
l
.ll
through my morning; filneze. exercises. cancful not to disturb our I
nei5hborls laundry. drying on a clothes line hanging .cross the bath- i

room and beyond. A cold shower makes an awful lol of noise. l

7:30
I finish ycstcrdayk borrhdr in the kitchen. wish ildown with hot
\ea.and ballet back to my room. Dressing to the radio news I Kern L1
Ioi about the achievements of Soviet industry and stagnation of the
Western one Alia the news I listen lo invigorating sounds of
lludashkinir Sth Symphony for bolnloikrnand orchestra. dedicated to
the XXII Party Conference.
7:35
I fish out a miki of vodka from behind a row of net imitation
~» BeIlul -bound volumes of :he complcle collections of' works by VJ.
Lenin un my fatIlcr's shelf. (My father subscribed to the works when
lie was a youn8studcnr of' Frurwc Military Academy -he just had to
-- nnd ever since the precious volumes have rested in pence and
honour.) I have a gurgle with the vodka. return the Miki to Lenin,
and decisively exit from the apartment. ignoring gnrmblen corona
ring from my mother.
 ....:.::.°a¢~w44l

as

7:45
I briskly walk towards Mytishchi railway station. a half mile walk
from our "military township." Vo_i~¢~n}¢a. the residential Ana for :he
stall' d lhc Military Communications Rescanch institute. where my
father worked prior to his promotion no the General Slatffand later
retirement from the scrvioc.
7:52
l'vc made it. I run through the automatic doors of the suburban
du-zridika train "Zamora k-Moscow," pressing myself mc the moss
of' we IllI passcngcrsovcIcrowding the carriage. 'T he pneumatic doors
Shut brllimi mc. puliiug the tails of my jacket. I try lo lake n deep
biwth. and an unwelcoming comrade. mc whose bosom I am
prtristcd. cahailcn galli¢. sardinca in tomato sauce and rye bread. I
catch sight of the pull lender profile ofanothcrvictifn of the morning
rush haul. Shu barely sexism. squashed between myself and some-
onc°s leather-coated back. l smile and mu be some room for her. She
smiles back. coming w life and inhaling stuffyair. Ilershouldcrs feel
son. and I almost touch her hai: with my dlc¢k. The train stops nl
lxnsinkd station. and the prcssulc pa square inch upon our bodies
doubles with a new bunch ofsmctly passengers. Now wean Iitcruily
"flesh of one flesh."
8:15
Moscow terminal. We fall out the dvuro of the train. compressed
into a single mass still. like half-alive Jews delivered by cattle-car to
the gas ovens of Treblinka. In the morning right I uilically u'b>¢1 ac
my fellow traveler and discover that herlcgs are bowed,alid that 1l¢I'
Cvechosiovakia coal is crumpled. hanging on her fragile Iigurc like
zu n empty potato bag. I smile farewell. She is swallowed by ii whir Poul
of a crowd casting sos glances. drawn by another streatn1 luwauls
Komsomols kziya metro slat ion .
8: I7
Going down the escalator, I notice a shapely figure clad in an
imported Bolonia raincoat. her sporty legs unburnt. 1 elbow my way
through the crowd. trying to soc her lace. I makcsure ta squeeze into
the same subway car with the "Bolonia. " Pressed together. we study
cash others anatomy through a quarter inch of clothing At Klrvv-
.skqna Nation I venture into :a conversatio n. By Dzerdzhinskqtw 1
manage to get lo the point of asking her form telephone number. She
says she goes B01 have any. she lies. live her mine. alto exit at fros-
pea marftzw with a Gagarin smile. The train carries "Bolonia" to
Hiblioleka Lmina.
$23
| emerge at Pushkin street. meditating upon " Bolonla." hopingshe
phones. The weather is goo4.so I walk. Two blocks south 01' Pushkin
 37
square l drop into the "Taoists C`al'clen'." and have a quicks. A
standard breakfast dsoshkl with utucrlraul (the Russian hal. dog),
an apple. and n cup of tau. The price of the breakfast is ouc-
hundredrh of my monthly pay: I ruble 50 kopswks. Thanks and
glory no the Party! Leninist Central Commiucc.
8:59
larrivc by :he guarded glass doors of' NovomLkecping my lDcalrd
ready in hand. with a feeling that almost half of my duly to the
Molhcrlnnd has already lxecn Qompktcti.
O:05
At my desk. meditating and (secretly) picking my nose. I
rriumphuntly observe others geeing in Inc and. depending upon
their position, :hat lhcy are nervous 01 casual about it.
9: IS
The progressive nruzglc for puncssion of' the TASS reports pile
:lads immediately it an it in um ulTtee Prom ulspatclt. The ply is
promptly divkted into the "open" TASS - :he reports about
echkvemenrs off our own and brotherly socialist ooumrks. In wllklt
nobody is interested. and "DS" - Dlqpolnnebmwv Svobshdltma -
these letters are stamped in Iii: upper right cornerofelch page. Here
we can road about lmppcnings in the deeeacnt capitalkt countries
and the Pcopk's China. These pages we read more attentively. but I
quickly. no be able w get to the mos: desirable pan orlhe pile: the 1

pages with u single red letter A in the upper right corner. This is what I
they call 'white TASS' - me most "seem" information: transla- ~!
tions ul' au tielcs .no comments of me w v rem papers about us. about i
l
trials uf Soviet dissidents. strikes in places like Novocllcrkassk or l
4
Minsk. gossip from the Kremlin. as perceived and interpreted by I
I
"reliable sounds close to the Central Commlltee"by sensatlomalist !l

Western reporters. Over thee pap; we fuss the most. trying to _l

siuwh them from each other and mending sometimes over souneonels I
I
shoulder. impatiently and eagerly. Sometimes me 'I ASS pile by- I
a

passes our room and goes directly to comrade Pushkov's ollioe.Tluat I

I
nuppfmx when our glorious and pace-loving armed lbroes liberate
someone from imperialist aggressors.
9:40
Soviet newspapers argue. Unwillingth tearing ourselves from the
'mcnsationulist fabrications" of Western media. we begin to scan the
"most tmtltful' not for information, of course. but in Sarah of
materials appropriate for exarmtl use. That could be an article. the
took O( which corresponds to the lust of "orders" from a foreign
branch of Novosli. or simply a lcssdogmatic piece of propaganda. lit
for consumption in a not-lou-progressive brotherly country.
Each or us checks our desk to see if Utere is any zqvnvka - a
request for such an article. red pencil marked by our boss. If thcte is
 38
none. we look through the Soviet mukulamra (waste paper) rather
casu4IIy_ On my desk. Most of the time. I find some note from my
boss comrade Makhotin. to find a suitable piece on growing cotton
in Uzbekistan and an interview with a Soviet indologist. Often there
is also u hint where to look for it: in today's papers. in the karma-ka.
the daily APN bulletin. or solicit such from a.n outside author. In
extremis -- lo eoneoel it myself.
For each 1 am supplied with an ample stock of little mkeus, the
sive of an index card. with red-lettttred words printed across: "origin-
al." "copy" or "culting."Thc last is for pieces lclipfrom the tttorning
papers. Anker also demands from me the name of theauthor.editor
tmcl. to which country or inxagmphkzal area the pink u to be ad-
dressed. into which languages to be translated and how lo be deliv-
ered (by foreign branch of' Novosii, by telex. by diplomatic bug. by
ordinary mail or throudt a forciun corretmondcm in Moscow.
An average piece of propaganda does not take much time to
process. l cut it from the newspaper page. paste it on a blank sheet of
while paper. change the Lille from "The Glorious Achkvemenus of'
Kalakhsun'r» Desert Captains* to u modest, "Kwakhslahz The
linen Yields Colon Fields." I replace :we or Mme paragraphs and
in mrl one-lhinrl nelle ml. and finally ~'nn Me copy an Me bonom.
pinning the code letters of' our deparlmcnl IGRSAZ - Glavnawr
RuhNria Srmn Amii). and lay the masrerpicoc on comrade Maklio-
lin's desk.
I(l'l¥l
Cnmmde Makhoiin arrives. as usual. in an impcccahk grey suit
and white shin. smelling of expensive shaving lotions of decadent
bourgeniu frigid. He perslonifiel ellieicncy and good manners. a
replica of ill: successful husirlesalmun in the decadent bolrrzeois
west He briefly leafs lllmugh the garbage piled by Lh on his desk.
burly concealing his mnlempt. The "cuLlings'° and Novosii bulle-
lins' "copies" hr sign: ulmml without I glance. and with :we lintels
cuslt l.l'l»:m iron the "our" fray. as if handling a dead mouse.
Malcriak solicited by APNls foreign bureaus orcvcn by indislduul
tareign newspapers are lnmted with more respect: :hey must bcsulc-
able. An "order" __ zn•\m»kn from New Delhi looks Iikca lclcgrnm.
and it is up locommde Makhmin mdeeidewhoohheslaffslmuld be
emruued with it. After a moment of my-dimtk\!L Makhntin drops it
on some¢me's desk. 'farlay it lands an mime. Ur I must dcvisea way in
provide the material. and make euggnlinn lfl ihc bum. The ways may
be several* to search For material on the mplc In our karmuka. to
order it [rom a Nmfosli author in any nthcrdepanment. or finally. to
write it myself The latter in privilege. for I am paida modes! royalty
from our depanmenNs hnnnmrillm fund. always overspent. Makho-
lin is in u grad mad. and [get his rnynlapproval. I in = neoncocling
lII.f.' article
 so

When the opus 4 ready and lypeé. I allachan ankera lo iLnnd pM

it on Mukllmin's desk. Thallls when the cycle of propzmgamda diges-
tion (or indigcstioni begins.
r1 0 0
I am lucky. The boss signs my opus, briefly scanning through it.
and not passing in no atnotherjunior editor to groom. I pick it up.und
start my trip through Novosli's intestines. as we say in Russian."like
u fool running with a bagful of' shit.`
My first stop isnt the "registration" room. a pan of the kanorcka.
described in an earlier chapter. Here I wake up a plump girl. day-
dreaming. find. using my charm. hypnosis. humor. and physical
furtc. make her open a huge log book and enter the number of' my
article on the appropriate page. and prim with . rubber stamp the
same number on my urtkefu. Having completed this gigantic fit of
labor. the girl drills back into her daydream
II' 10
Leaving her. l fly to the sensor's room. Ido not rememberasin9Je
when one of the three censors passed my material on the spot.
even if it was totally innocent and did not. contain any state secrets.
The censor mumbles. "Put it them. com: back in a minute ..."and l
l
ubscnt-mindcdly states into another article. straining his brains to !
l
lind :secret inlbrmution the decadent enemy in tbc west could turn I
!
ggainq its. I
I
l
I
"In u minute." my amide is still theme. It would be still then in an l
Il
hour. three hours. u day. at week. etc.. so I take it into my strong I
I

young Communist hands and bring it lo the censors very purple I

nose. while making vague gestures and whispering something like. I

" Ivan Pctrovich wanted this urlcntly for the Alex dispatch an 6:25." I

Them is no Ivan Pctrovich and thctc may nor be any telex connection
with Delhi al 6:25. but that is immateriaL l even suspect that the
censor knows I am blulline But my bluff works because I know the I
magic power which Russian patronimics. whispered respectfully I\l
with mysterious numbers. and words like "urgent" and "clas\il'ted.°' 2
I
I

aeeompza hied by vague linger gestures towards the eeilinghas on the

simple tired souls of Soviet bureaucrats.
The censor pretends to (ind some small error in my article. inq uines
about the meaning of several figures borrowed from the ollichl sta-
tisticnl yeurliooks. looking nevertheless suspicious. and besilantly
puts his rnhher stamp on the upper right corner of each page of my
snick.
I I-zs
Snulching my work from the censor. I run back tothe daydream-
ing girl: my material is "or;inaI." and the tops could be of use to
some other department. A copy must be deposited in thckarroleka.
This time the girl must enter even' detail of the ankera. perfectly
 Comrade Makllotin In one of his best moods (and toxldoes)

l'»"£E

P.; l4'Hl*,l_}

Secrefary girl Tamara, danghtar of 8 KGB officer expeled

from Norway in early 60'
 41
clearly. just in case.
The at or photocopying cannot be entrusted 1a mc: duplicating
machines in my counarys llcoplc"e new agency arc guarded man
jeulnsly than the ntnNear Wallleirlrs in the Pennlgonk slorehmuee. For
photocopying APN employs another dnydntamel. who blushes
deeply as I (unintentionally) ulan re al the low cut of her blouse. The
machine gives birth to a pinkbzh epottd copy. legible if you hold the
pages against a briglll light.
I I:4l)
I have acopy in one of' the countless Me lddelaund leayethegirls
totally cxilnusled by their effnn. I run lo the fourth floor. to the
trannluaion department. Here I have to bother one of the over-ripe
girls.. slrnggling through a pile of' boring propaganda to be turned
into boring English versions Normally. one page takes them about
90 minutes. but with my enmtaragemem and peslerlng it may take
only 20. There is not much new xo translareanyway: eaehaniek con-
sisls of it slightly varied combination or the Anne old droNes. 1 most
unchanged since Ill' & Pelrolllx hero Oslo Bender invented his
"universal kit for newspaper nrlicle writing."All oil hails down lon
brilliant idea. that because we are the best in an otherwise decadent
world. everyone should listen and obey.
I volunteer to tlssisl by sitting close to one ogre girls. Theuansla-
tors already know the racier of junior editors like myself. but done
mrnd.The girlpatronilcs n1e.andonIIs mea "lime crow' for my nose.
looking al me as a cur would look are small bird. But I fly away wish
the copy. To typirrls
l2'l§
TypisLs` room. Another struggle with temptation. this lime much
younger. Here. to make Nina doherjob. I have to pledge another trip
with her to I Ber rozka foreign currency Maw. Then. retype 'm tripli-
atc. my pace returns to ourdepnnmenlhsecnrary. Tamara. Before
n is dispatched (0 India, it collects a couple more signatures from
Makhotin and Pushkov. lfir wen goinglu Delhi by dnplomatic mail.
I might relax -- Tamam would take can: of IL Bm the material is
*urgent9 and meant to be transmitted by telex. so I have another
round of' troubles. l have to gel an OK and a signature from Pushkov
myselli He ia absent. sn l run to the this Iloorand ambush one of the
members of the directorial board. comrade Pishchik. lam lucky: I
get his signature in a matter of seconds. amer btreling him on the
content of my opus (Pishchik uewerbotlrcrs to read the stuff). All this
isdcne. nor so much for sadistic purporcats to preventany "urea nr.-
ed' text gating on rho inlemarional radio wives, still our ofcomrol
of the KGB-
I2:30
\ run hack lo the fuurxh Uoorond shove the thug into the Tim' win-
 42
dow in the huge plank wall nl the lclctypc hull. The dc:hurm.l-u girl
operator stnllinivrs $11c next. let :here should be anything but sub-
vcnivc propaganda. Shu passes II to one of me key-punch lypisrs.
und l finally lose control oycr my l:r¢HlI0n. lt is on its way tO India w
do Ive job of screwing up Indian minds-

l'{lll p.m.
Trying to cutch my brcutlt. I nm into at colleague. equally sweaty
und wild-eyed. We start negotiating the lunch bteuk. One docs not
simply "haw lunch" in Novosti. unless. of' course. he is a newcomer
or a hopeless mislil. Anyone with prestige and position belongs to
one's own 'lunch group." And. depending on the amount olcasli (the
closer to pug.-day poludafra, the less). the group either tloeks to the
Novosli cafeteria. orliles out through the glass doors into Moscow's
hll'cl¥ls.
'lltc purpose of the lundt group is very important: it indicates who
are your friends. and what is vourworth. Some*'privilcgcd"groups
h1-:td towards Moscow's higl1-claws restaurants. such as the Angel.
Urbekisrnn. or Baku. Our Ask n department sponsors the Pepin
nestsumnl in Mayakovski Square.
farly with one's lunch group can a Novosxi man he safe tocrilici7¢
his hnueres and express political views. To beudmiuod to n group. one
must prove hisdiscretionmcnse of humor. catneraderic --- and ability
to :or hack borrowed money. My group consists of' Karen Gcvork-
yuo. :url triter of' Cauasiun and Oriental foods. Vadim Srniroov. my
scltoolmnre later en-opted to the CC. Today we include some our-
widen* him from TASS. Viktor from external affairs (both
Arl\bi~.n). and another Viktor. from the KG B. Our loyalty has been
tlrturfl by years of t'riendship. Non: ol'us. we want in he sum. isublc to
nepon on anther.
We would new: allow un unlit member into our group. such as
Mn Tinnvyrv .a shifty link: hasturd. who rum with his bo-s.~s's. Sasha
Gnrnovls=. car keys nhcad of' his boss to warm up the motor of his
export-brand Volga station wagon Disgusting. We woukl not
bother. on the other hunrl. in infiltrate a group of such lynchers in
Grolnykols ton. or Rrwhncvk daughter. or Krushchevh son-in-1ow.
all of' them belonging ro Novosti's elite. We would not leclcumlurta-
bw in tlwir prewrrr :even if they would not mind playing at "demo-
entry" and ha wing some eaIltl.s in their l:ompany. [or emcnainmem. it
nothing else.
I' IS
The weanlwr permits. an we walk to our meeting plane. The way to
Uzbekirmn is lnuclkst ofall -- along the boulevard. watching: pretty
girls sitting on park bl.'l\CI'l¢S.
 pa
3:00
When ull topics and political jokes und gonad are exhausted. we
head back lo the olTioe in a peaceful and hwy mood. 'l`hc rent of the
working day auld vary from continued rlyina around lo sitting at
not:'s desk. pretending to be busy. Some ambitious comrades spend
the Matt of the day composing their own matterids or doing the
rrsrnrch for them.
Reading Soviet newspapers gives me ntasodiistie pkasune: it
rlvlkes mn deeper and harder in my hatred of the system and it cures
any illusion lhm the system can ever haw; "Si human face.
4:00
We have out "coordinating meeting" or prnirvoriith-runny:
wv¢'.Ihvh4nl1'¢ - a boring and unproductive exchange no opinions
on catch other's work. mainly with the Only ultimate purpnstein mind
_. to kill any creative and individtlllicticeffnrt in its nlrlieil embryo-
nic etude. Egnliuirianixm in medinrrity is mrrgtliding rule. We receive
a short briefing on the latest lists of topics and viewpoints suggested
to Nnvosti by our immediate master. Agilprnp In theme frillings
(IvmrM.) we. ttatjournalists and mer bent of the Pa rly. rlnhnralle on
the ways to put the stupid and tote fly illogtealtutanavkl of Agttmp
into passable, or even entertaining verbal form. so that they may
have u ¢hane. to be picked up and reprinted in the foreign media.
5:00
The exodus staruz. Basses disappear first. The masses sometimes
e=u\y'behind. Iockthodoonsand hlveu Iittieeclebrntion. in which use
a junior will bo sort to the Glrfronum aoruos Pushkin square for n
bottle (or two).
6:00
On the way homo. in thoeleetrietrain. l observe the proletariat and
kdkhoznlks. crowding and sweating. carrying with them large net-
bago. awnkrz. lightly ealulfod with bread. mac-I ron. cheap kolbulso or
aurrldlri. trying to "erse the difference between the city and village'
by buying foodstuffs in Moscow :md carrying them home. I listen to
their life stories and anecdotes and their complaints about the had
life. i syntpnlhiva but at the sumo time fool happy I am not one Of
them. \ nm of the privileged cMu. do not have to carry food home
from Moscow to Mytiahchi; I do no! have to stand in Ionglines. for l
have access to special shops for those II little bit mon equal than
others in the land of equality and nbundnneo.
On the other hnnd. the proktnrians have something I lock
freedom to :one our leaders and our eyeteln aloud. They have
"nothing to lose but their chains. "l have e lot to loose. iI'I loosen my
tongue. So. pretending to be haalfaIalarp. I listen to the wlsdcm of the
poor - political jokes. some d which l will "sell" to my Nrwosli
colleagues tomorrow at lunch.
 44

7:00
lseldomwateh TV. WIullcattl\ome. myfavoritcmediumisashort-
wine radio set. imported by my father from libel-ated East Germany.
I spend hours by the set. tuning lo the Vice of' America. BBC. and
Deutsche Wells for news frornahroad: Radio Luxzemburg and Radio
Tchera n. to: music: All India Radio. for nostalgia But to rnostexei-
ting for mc is Radio Svoboda (or Radio Free Europe). the station
that informs me about Irappe ring; in my own country. It is an irony:
I work for a new agency.
At the supper table I quarrel with my parents and tell them I am
not going to be thankful lo them for a "happy childhood" in the sys-
tcm they have built for mc. My father, an ok! Bolshevik. calls me
names. but my rather. daughter of an affluent Ukrainian farmer.
tells me with a sigh that with my attitude. I'd be unhappy under any
system.
9:00
I retire to my room with a paperback Arrtcriarr novel. borrowed
from a Novosti friend just returned from abroad. or with a copy ofa
Samizdat. entrusted to me only for the night. I know l will never be
able to write and self-publish anything like this. I have sold my soul
to the system.

"La ciolce vita" of the Novosti Ellie.

 4B

WHAT ARE FOREIGNERS?

"Big deal!" some of' my countrymen may say. "iorcugncrs are
people who live ill foreign countries. encircling the Soviet UnIon."
"What else*
"Well ... foreigners are free to come to us. but we cannot s° lo
Lhcm. "
"Very mwttw definition. comrade! Shame on you! You should
1u-ld more newspapers!
"OIL .. I ... of. will you!"
"No. first. km me tell you what foreigners are. Correct mc. if l am
wrong."
Foreigner arc. For us. divine creatures. dangerous and holed.
[hey are people from a difrercm planet. every moleetlk of their
bodies being :nude from a different set of elements. We treat them
with respect and fear. trying to please by showing our best and newest
communal barracks and whkhcver crop has survived in the collec-
tive fields. But at the same time we have to be extremelyvigilatnt with
them. for any one of them maybe an enemy. it spy. a subverter. a
saboteur. Foreigners act: of dilTerent kinds: proletarian and bour-
neois. but it is safer to suspect them all.
Foreigners wear unavailttbk things: stretch socks. nylon shots. I
I
I
Italian min coats. high boots *a-la-Russe" made in Japten. l`ur coats
made ollSiberi:ln fox and sarbles. Dacron suits, woolen sweaters.ete.
Foreigners' pockets contain desirable things such as bull-point pcm
and chewing gum. Theme are numerous curneresaround their necks,
and most of them work. Foreigners drive shiny foreign cars. and
when they park on our streets we gather around their ears, touching
:he ehmmc. but utterly inrdiiTcrcnt lo this gimmick of capitalism.
Some people say mlm foreigners give us croriits in their foreign cur
reney. And we love thdr currency. irrerspeetiwe of age. Parrysurtus or
nmition. Most of us love it nlrrtonically. just being happy to ~;,. rn
that our mighty Smtc has received u few billion decadent unworthy
American dollars from whatever deal. The biggest lovers of foreign
currency are our biggest people. out' kaders."servants dtlre people."
For example. the General iieaetary of' the Communist Party of the
USSR is so crazy about the foreign credits that he readily gives away
~nythirra we have- timber. aes. oil. caviar. vodka. Jews. marreshka
doily. gold. masterpieces of an from the Hermitage. icons; it' there
were wheat. he would give them that, but it docs not grow well in our
country due to "uni'avourarhk climatic condition." The ordinary
people. for selling their personal effects to foreigners in exchange for
the currency which the mute lowes. may be exeerrteri. a5"economical
enemies of' the State."
 a;.w.¢:li

4s
This is smother reason foreigners are so much hated by us. The
main run-son. lhou8h. in if al our kind is encinclcd by impcrialisls. who
constantly plot to elirnimtc our glorious Santo. 'IlLs is why every true
plalriol und inlemutionnlisl has unanimously supporltd the dforln of
our nrmcd foxes lo protect our cncirckd Motherland. by fighting
ugninsl Wcwlcrn imperialism in Afghanistan. Vietnam. South Korea.
Finland. Norway. Portugal. Africa. India. Cuba. Angola. Ethiopia.
Nicaragua. EI Sulweior. Cham. Canada and Anlansiica. That is why
:wry Soviet patriot meal develop in himself a pun class haired au
every foreign imperialist. and wnsia fitly reveal al! fomiglxn us
agcnls of foreign imperialism. In that ckur so far?
"Clear than you talk too much. What is your name. Wlluads" Mu;-
I :xc 'your doculucuts'!"
(You acc. he lllinb I am a fu1cig1lul)

vaarv8
Until 1957 do not remember reeingany loreigncrsat all. therefore
I had only warm feelings for them. intuitively tmderslunding that
whatever bad is said about foreigners by our propaganda is untrue. I
envied foreigners because they lived in foreign countries. I longed to
meet the foreigners. but they were too fur away. Somewhere there
were brave French stevedores who refused lo load tanks for Vietnam.
there were oppressed and deprived American Blacks. and exploits
American workers: there were hungry farmers in Canada - but I
had never seen them. Most probably. the imperialist circlesdld not let
these good foreigners leave Iheir countries and come to our land for
[car that they would ace how lucky we were with Socialism. oral lcasi
that was the csphnnution in the newspapers.
Ar a certain age I wanted to be a foreigner. feeling myselftt bit oh
misfit. Imagine u ten-year-old boy listening on the rudioubottt bread
growers of Stavropolye overfulfilling the plan of wheat harvesting
for the State. or seeing the movie "C`ossaek.'4 of' Kuban'° when the
eolleelive l'armcrsltables were landed with food and wine. and at the
some time in Kiev my mother would wake mc upttt 6 a.m. to take my
place in the bread line. You would feel like at foreigner: especially it'
you were born into it Soviet army oITieerls family and still remem-
bored although vaguely. such things as Spam. powdered eggs.
condensed milk. supplies to us by lendlease from the U.S.
When I became a high school student. I remember beings success-
ful impersonator of foreign ueeents in school amateur shows.
In 1951 forthesakc OII*'strengthcning pcttceand fricndshipantong
the nations of the world." N iltita Sergecvitch Krushehetr allowed the
Inn ever "International Youth Festival' in Moscow. We saw as
many fOreigners as we wanted. They were walking in Red Square!
 41
Alive! Unprotected! One could (carefully) approach them. touch
them. say something like. "Mfr. diwhba!" (pence. friendship).
Exchange badges! Addresses! We could really slnengthen friendship.
for about two weeks!
"M¢|.rkva- MNrga-Los .4rtgeI¢.1
United gladly i 1 to one kolkhoz!"
When the young foreigners finally left Moscow and wcnl lo their
respective foreign countries to continue the vtork of Communist
propaganda. by telling; fables about Soviet achievements. alter
Moscow was ckuned and swept of Ibteign cigprctte butts and
chewing gum wrappers. our VD clinics became crowded with young
people who took "suengthming of peace and friendship" too literal-
ly. Many of' them lost some part of their admiration for things
foreign.
As to me. I managed to preserve my faithfulness to the Motherland
and did not catch VD. So I was still [and of foreigners. Moroovcr.
from admiration of well-tailored clothes and ckgant cans I nrmde a
funhcr saw to the realization that the fotvcigners were superior to us
in I we they were natural. they wen not afraid to socialivs. they
were fnec to criticize their governments and countries. Slowly the
idea grew in my rind: I understood that denwrroqris not what exists
in the USSR. it is what foreigners have in their countries And I had
faith in denwmar_1'. Al that time I could not know that many of my
countrymen also had iirith in Western democracy. and that this faith
had cost hundreds of thousands of tlnrm their lines. Only many years
later did I Icam what Wcatern democtue' - did to prisoners of war
who rebelled aeninst the Soviet Fascism during World War II and
joined Germans in the vain hope d crushing Stalin? tyranny. 'Huey
had no other choke: the West was not so/ins to help my nation to
overthrow the ttentlemen in the Kremlin; on the contrary. they were
"allies" with Stalin. Unarmed. trnprokeled. naively trusting the
"common sense" of Westencrs. thousands ut' men. women and
ehildrcn then gust themselves un to the British and Americans. who
turned them over Io Stalin. and collective gnwes Thus the West
betrayed its only friends in Soviet Russia. leaving enemies alive and
wen maid.
But back in 1957 I aid nor knowllla1.Th¢ faclsabouzthe shamcrul
Yulia deal and Tweflnaid' bcmygl were concealed both by Sovkr
4
r

propaganda and by me Western media. A1 max dmc my IIHIIIGQ lo

foreigners could best bedefineci by me wordsina6mirauon. hope and
envy. " In the rlyll9hOs dull aukudcslowlychangedw "punlemcm
and co nl'usion.°'
Afltr my 1'ln1 :4uvl:1'al cvulauclx with forcigncna :luring my universi-
ly Yuan s. my aiiii du digrcaacd fulllIcI luwurds "pity and disillusion-
 ON BEHALF
> OF THE WORLD
g
2 PEACE
a
s
COUNCIL,
5°
v\ PAUL no318son
HANDS
3 NADEZHDA
IF NADEZHDINA
E.
THE GRAND
as h
o GOLD MEDAL
e
II
as
In
o FOR PEACE.
a AWARDED TO
n HER COMPANY
:s.
n
E:
M

`8
u
nQo
5
n
as
an
a
=
2"
 49
men." and after graduation from the Oriental Studies Institute and
several your: of Novosti work with foreigners. both lf the USSR and
abroad. the barometer drifted Further down.
#vtwaw
The process of' losing lai lf in :he forcigrrcrs started ever so slowly.
Try to imagine post-war Moscow. hnndshipa. Cold War paranoia.
new waves of politiarl artists. disintegration of' whatever freedom
our people had won from Stalin on reward forwinning the at. Old
people lnmblod every nigh: cxpoclinglhc KG II to knock at the door.
Young pcopk were hypnotized by the cynicism ofgovcnuncnl terror
and proptqnndu. Imagine now. that from th¢slronghuldul'W\:a¢:ln
Ircodom. the United Statca. to which Soviet citizens secretly prayed
for aulvmion and hope. then comes a "civil lilla Gghlcrf' world-
Famous singer Paul Robeson. He sing; lu us. lilt: wliilt slaves of
Stalin. about the back aluvcs ofU ml: S¢m.Tllan we un understand.
But when that "bird with black top" slug; to us:
" I du not Mem- an-r other rouurr.r.bul :he USSR
When' men uM brwflrt' au fra~h""
When I had become it member of the Young Pionusr Organization
(th: Soviet aguivalent of Hiller's Jugend). I remember being tok! lo
draw llrc "in:au: dove" ul Pulrlu Picasso. Tlii$ was Me tlmc O! lht
naorioua "Slockhollu Peas: Appeal" - another propaganda trick
Igor Me naive WusMurn wurkl. Everybody was collecting signatures
under the Stockholm appeal to bun nuclear armament. and most
Soviets umleraworl that it quasar fake. Even asa teenager 1 could soc
tlrr ougli the wlrule llriug and sllltul actively hating nom only "Pence
and sons." but anything painted by Pablo Picasso, good or bad.
Many years liner I ettn explain my aversion lo me are : I painter In
logical lei ms. an honest artist Il'1ll5'l no: allow a communist-fascist
regime Lu up: his work for propaganda.
Imagine Moscow in 1960.a lrungryyear ofdisasuouscrop failure.
Despite the declarations of Khrushchev about the USSR ls.ovcrla king
the USA' in all kinds of production. mctuaing Milk and meat. the
situation even in Moscow foodstores was tragic. In the students1
utntecn of' Moscow State University thcrcwas no more free ureas on
the tables, o ~eorrhelrpnevlous liberties. Amammotb°'wortd Pace
Congress' was summoned to Moscow. Paid by the Kremlin,
thousands of our foreign friends had come to Moscow to talk about
Me neoellslty ofrllsarming the west. '°l'Iulnanlsts" -- writers. priests.
scientists. byers. political and public figures. Irrespective of race.
color or creed. arrived in the USSR with one thing in common: a
selective blindness to the negative side or Soviet life.
Irnaglne the abundance of the Kremlin palace. where dll these
"p\.~aceniks" sl.ulTed themselves with selected foods. while ordinary
people corrtinued to queue for the humblest necessities.
 50
imagine Me group of' wl:ll~uuulish¢d Western dckgales. stuffing
themselves with eavlar and slut Leon in the Kremlin. telling mc. :heir
interpreter. how bad life is in America. how banks force them IO buy
more and more goods on credit. and Ituw Americana are in an much
deb! (Mt may do not belong no lllemselvu. but 10 the banks.
I could no: respond properly. am spin in their fat faces. for fear of'
KGB agents sneaking all over the Kremlin. over hearing the *free
exchange of ideas."
l9b2. Baku. she capital day of u colony or Moscow. named
Ast:rbtli.lan. I am in a black Charka llmousinc la bad Soviet replica or
Me Cadillac). I am aoeornpunyinga dlsilngulshed guest from India. an
wntcr. politician, humanist. frlcnd of the soviet people. I :aku him
tor a trip no the sea oil exploration of the Caspian "Off stones." Our
limousine stops at a red light. and in the bright early mor ring sun my
Ind'~ n guest seesaeolorlutand long queue ofpeopleQislandlngbylhe
bread slum "Bulo¢'lvtql'a. "
"What are these people doing?" Hacks Me writer. politician and
humanist.
*Waiting tor Inc morning newspaper fhawra. " I answer without
hesitation. knowing that our driver. a KGB marL overhears every
word.
"Truly. 171 tell you. Me Soviet system a total literacy does
wond¢rs.I°' sys the guest, rolling down his window to better observe
the highly-educated soviet masses. Al this very moment a tiny
wicket-window of the store opens and the Nm lonfol' breademerges.
eagerly cuught by the Iirst man in the line. At the noun of the line
some disturbance occurs: two mustnchcd Azerbaijan ni men drug away
at screaming Russian bdbusiika. and I overhear the words. "Go to
Moscow. and cat your f... ing Russtan bread. not our Asrrrtmuijnni
one"Tho old woman. crying, got to the end of the line.
The traffic light changes lo green. and our black limousine speeds
away from the "newspaper kiosk. " on the docks of me sea oilexplo-
ration platform we are ma by Party and administration Mata.
Befog Me inspection., we are invited "bra snack. "which happens to
be a luxurious feast with lots of boon and caviar.
"To peace and friendship among the peoples"says the Party boss.
raising his Gina of vodka.
"TO India's socialist path, following the sweat example of she
USSR!" answers the Indian guest.
What an honest person should have done. would be Io stand up
and tell the Party basis that he refuses lo eahdrinh. or for that matter
inspectthe°°lloriousadikvenienls.°°lnasymbolic prolestofsolideri-
ty with the hungry people. Nothing unusual. The politicians and
humanists do it back home in Ind' loshow solidnrilyagainstthe big
~1

capitalists. Why an: they so shy in the USSR?

 51
And the last episode. A well-known poet of' l ndia. translated in the
US and Great Britain. comes lo the USSR for vacation paid for by
the Soviet government. as a reward for his "revolutionary"activities
in the past. In the early twenties. he had helped to undermine law.
order and social institutions in the former British colony; not by
writing poems. of course they came later. when the young revolu-
rinnnry poet became the old revolutionary noel. glorifying his own
deeds. What were the deeds? Smuggling fires runs. ammunition.
mines. explosives and ideological propaganda into India via Kabul
from a spy aM sabotage training centre in Tashkent.
As we know now. independence came in adiflercnt way. thanks to
responsible national leaders. not using explosives and ammunition
smugged from Soviet Russia As for the revolution. it did not work
quite the way he wanted. Hut llt4° Srwiel junta dirt not give up its
efforts to turn the former Rritish lrolnny nm a prnwnl Soviet one
Only now. after Stalin's death. the methodswerc changed. II w8s Igor
time of "peace and friendship and co-existence and cooperation,"
meaning subversion. and the revolutionary poetry was needed In
marry the struggle or Nehru and Gandhi with the great ideas or
Marx. Engels. Lenin and Khrushchev.
More than forty yearn were sacrificed by the Indian revolutionary
poet for the cause offrcedom. equalityand progress, to own the right
to sec the country of freedom. equality and progress. A dehydrated,
wrinkled and shaky seventy-year-old revolutionary was delivered.
under my guidance aS an APN translator. to the "special" clinic of the
Kremlin. open lo Party leaders but closed to the masses.
A rosy. plump Russian lady doctor. specially selected to treat the
elite. attentively listened through a stethoscope to the tired heart of
the revolutionary. l dutifully translated her commands to breathe
und not to breathe into Urdu; and his incoherent senile boaslinginto
Russian.
"Why hoveyou neglected your health so much'p` asked the R ussian
doctor. palpiting his chicken-like chest.
"Oh, there was no time for hygiene and health cafe." said the poet
proudly. "we were too busy. blowing up police stations. shooting the
British officers from behind the corners. robbing the banks. inciting
mutinies. agitation. geuingjail terms . . . you know. revolutionary
struggle is not a joke .
"Oy-oy. "aighcd the compassionate lady." what a heroic man! You
have probably seen l.enin""
"Yes. I have met Lenin." answered the chicken--revolutionary
modestly.
"Dal" said the Kremlin doekrrdecisively. '°we'l1 give you first class
treatment. People like you should be taken earc o£"
I easily imagined n different situation. What if the son of this good-
 ave .'lo¢ll co
vu.leyMolvql» the aurhorfif
face cfore

=wT
avow* """"'3:4-M
with a :dl-tuned ga-
lwwe--analsinging songs the: um
be sad. fanny or disquieting

IN

II

U.S. defense commitment to Western Europe

comes under attack by vocal minority; pressure
also builds inside u.s.

"Forcignel-4" - and the and result Of anti-Amencanlsm '

scum bumlng us nag "tor peace". Why not Soviet flag'
 so
hearted Russian lady doctor. an officer of the Soviet colonial Army
in Hungary. had been shot from behind a corner by a Hungarian
revolutionary poet? Would she sigh about that I-lunge rian's neglec-
ted health? Or would she ratherapprove what was done by hersonto
the hundreds of Hungarian revolutionary poets. cornered in bullet-
ridden city buildings. surrounded with Russian tanks and blasted at.
point blank. mixing brieks'dust,natcr pipes. 'windowglass and book
shreds with Hungarian blood into one porridge?
Many years later. when I had already defected to the West. I read
the book *The Russians' by Leonid Vlldimirov. Ht: wrote that.
"among the Soviet intelligcntsis there was no hatred towards
Foreign Iiberak. leftists and other misguided p~ ~ple. who ~ilowed
Soviet propagandn to take advantage of them: if anything they felt
wndesoending compassion." wrist Vladimirov. 'because many
Soviet intellectuals understand that most of thc'fcllow-tmvellcrs'are
°honest. humane. only naive' monk."
If this is true. then the gallery of the naive and misled is largenhan
the Hermitage. I-'rom presidents and prime ministers. divine half of
Europe over to slavery bya scribble oftltcir pen. to entertainers and
artists ubrifyine that slavery fore handsome payment frotnNovosti:
from taut humanists to great bandits - all sons. all colors. all
creeds.
I m not an "intcllectulI," and unlike my count ryman Vlldimirov.
who was editor of a. scientific magazine. I socialized with i'¢t'*ei5N
uuesu more actively. as a Novosti "Guido" Yet. then wash period in
my life when I tended lo Forgive the foreigners for their criminal
naivety. Moreover. I imatlincd al a certain time in my career that
those zusranm' (detouloty to rhyme with lnasrranrsi-foreigners) I
had to accompany in the USSR were exceptions. that the rest of the
liberals and leftists abroad deserved respect. But alter Yuan with
Novosti. and hundreds of encounters with those fttreitgners. 1
changed ms' attitude to :attempt and disgust.
Both the KGB and Aaimrop know perfectly well about thismrtnl'
xenophobia among the Novosti's staffers dealing with Ibrnigners.
and 111 bet they share our feelings and eneouragcthem for a purprute
it is easier to manipulate the foreigners with the help of' foreigner-
hating Novosri men. It is alsosalcr. Feelintgs ofoonlempt and disgust
prevent Novosti staffers from being "coniamimted" by the Watrnrn
ideoloB' if such exists). Thus. xenophobia is a vital arr incvitahln
element of IDEOLOGICAL SUBVERSION.
 54

A LOYAL AND DEDICATED STEPSON

"The USSR grunts the right ofusylum to foreigners per-
secuted for defending the interest: of the working people
and the cause of peace. or for the participation in the
revolutionary and national liberation movement."
(Soviet Constitution. Article 38)
In early 1968. the Central Committee of the Communist Party of
West Bengal elected Bishnu Mtlkcrjce to be a resident at the High
Parry School of Ideology in M scow. lt was an honor and inward for
its 57-year-old faithful son: it was the type of school al whkh the likes
of Patrice Lumumba and Waller Ulrbicht had learned the principles
of ideological subversion. Angola's Augustine Neto went there. as
did Afghanisr,an's Taraki. Zirnbabv.e's Porno. etc.. etc.
To Bishnu Mukcrjce. who began life in an East Bengali village.
Moscow was splendkl. The hospitality of' his Soviet comrades. the
touching care of the Soviets towards their younger generation
("chiidrcn are our future. the most privileged class in our classless
society")- the world's best subway system (with its mutate and
monuments and slogans: a gallery. church and wax mueenm of
Communism). A one-room apartment was thoughtfully provided hy
the Soviet Central Committee. in a prefabricated block close in the
Exhibition of Achievements of the People's Economy - a huge.
open-air disvlav of certain industrial and agricultural machinery
built by victorious Soviet socialism Within 50 years. Comrade
Mukcrice confessed to his Soviet translators that it brought him tears
of delight, to think that it had all been done for the be-ople.
Bishnu Mukerjee was not II snob. Although he :understood the
historical importance of his personality. to secret to the necessary
conspiratorial regulations of the party). he was content that his
ascetic life would lead lo tltejust and progressive society that he and
the masses would enjoy in his homeland after the revolution.
Although he missed the spicy ecstasy of Bengali food, he ate his
Soviet canned sardines in tomato Sauce and eggplant "caviar" with
staunch revolutionary fervor. sometimes washed down by a good
glass of vodka. In the evenings, after classes. he had the pleasure of a
television set. donated by the Trade Union Committee of Progress
Publishing House. There he wnrkr-d occasionally in his covorjob. an
a translator of propaganda honklernfm.m Russian to Bengali, Ol' at
least pidgin English to Bengali. for his intensive Russian course had
not had too much effect and a little help was always in order.
Bisllntz Mukerjcc had joined the party long ago. probably during
the war. when British India and Soviet Russia were nominal allies.
With partition. India was more sympathetic to Communists than
 55
was Pakistan, and Mukcrjec drifted from Dacha to Calcutta.
Belonging lu the cause had helped him to overcome a personal disas-
ter: his broken engagement with a girl from a wealthy Calcutta fami-
ly. He had been unlucky with women all his life, but his efforts on
behalf of the party took must of his time and energy. At First he was a
courier. raking the inshuetions of the party committee, not to be
trusted lo the mails; thcnan agitutui umongstudents. paid bya leftist
newspaper for which he did the odd soul of pl'ool'reading: finally a
party administrator. There was practically 110 lime for marriage.
A rare moment of ¢0llfuslon had impirrged upon his consciousness
during a recent visit to a "closed" party shop in Red Square. right in
front of Lenin's tomb. In a small hull, wirldows lightly ¢uIMind.
comrade Mukerjee was offered a modest. uhoiw ul' clothing from
some crowded shelves. It was unlike a shop in Calcutmk Clwwi ing-
hec Road. where the assortment might have Mun a bit blwdel .
certainly better displayed. Shy of trying things on. he selected a
winter coat from East Germany. a pair of fur-lined rubber shoes from
Pokmd. a conservatively la iloted Finnish suit. and a fur hat. mad: in
the USSR at a factory named after Rosa Luxembourg. A scmry
stood by me door. which was lodged behind him.
In as couple of months. overwhelmed with gratitude for his Soviet
hosts. com rttde Mukerjee expressed his desire to celebrate the
achievements of the country in articles foz'Soviet and foreign news-
papers. A contact in the Central commiuee's Dopa foment of' South
East Asia listened attentively and suggested that the appropriate
place for so noble an enterprise would be the novosti Press Agency
-- it takes care to disseminate the most truthful information about
the USSR all around the world. and what is more. pays 10 to 15
rubles per page for material of this sort by any author.
One may only speculate whether comrade Mukcrjee entertained
himself. en route lo the Novosli ollicc, with translations Of Russian
rubles into lndtan rupees; and if he did. with what rare of cxcha nge.
Notwithstanding. upon his amvai he became my problem. was a
junior editor with novosb 's South East Asia Department.
It was one of those days in our monstrous propagaindacartel when
all its little wheels and cogs for some mysterious reason were running
with the utmost friction and noise. II was nu day when most of the
senior bosses were "out for a meeting." the traffic of propaganda
stopping. for want Of signatures. II was a day when a secretary, a
charming girl. with Brezhnev's IQ. or lower. was busy shopping for
her expected illegitimate baby. causing on rlrndc union leader 10 pass
at hat. to collect donations for the future Soviet Citizen. lt wnsaday
when. havingscen me every morning fOr live years. the sentry sent me
I home for my press card. It was probably one or muse days when
several inlluc-niial western newspapers approached our agency for
g
I
 is
an "opinion poll" on how the Soviet people reacted to the latest
statement of President Nixon.
I was summoned to the office of the South East Asia bass and told
to meet Mu kezjec downstairs: "Dani brine that black ass here."
The "black ass" was a small thin man with a peasant open face.
horn-framed spectacles. and a modal blue °'Mao°°jacke1. huttnned
to the throat. He held a rolled bundle of' typewritten pages in one
delicate dark hand. an optimistic smile (like that often angel who has
taken the wrong elevator}. and with his other hand he held mine until
every purpose of his visit had been explained. I knew that holding
hands was common in India. and so did not withdraw as my ml.
leagues would have done. I expected the wnm, hm what I read sur-
prised me'
All over the world the cym Mall nppr09md people turn-
ing tray to Mnwnw Red Stare of K remlin with hope
and expectation knowing that the long night of' slavery.
impnnalism. mkminlist oppression and racism will soon
he :wer The new era has already started - here in the
Motherland of Snrinlism. where all the dreams of man-
kind are fulfilled. Now, that I have the honor to witness
the happiness of this courageous nation, now only do I
ttndenstzind how vile and inhuman are the reactionary
circles. in their futile efforts to distort the truth a bout the
Soviet Union ...
A list of truths followed.
"Not bad. not bad at aiL'°l said to comrade Mukerjec, explaining
that I do not make dec-s-ons: toaccept rnstcrinl. but that I would to kc
it to the chief editor. Comfatie Mukerjee would not let me go,
inquiring about pawtnents :md copyrights. II' the New York Timctl'
reprinted the articn would he be paid by Novosti, or should he
cl1a18L' the Times directly? Half an hour wars required to get rid of
him.
Upetain: in my boss's office. I raceiwd instructions to throw the
article in the waste basket. With rcspecl for the rcvollllionalry past of
comrade: MukcIjee. my boss Signed an slip of pa per for the accounting
office. worth twenty rubies .
This did nm dkmurage Mukerjee. In a weak he returned with two
more works of similar merit. bitterly combining that he had been
underpaid For his first and demanding copies of those loroign ncws-
papers which had frprinzed it. I took him to my boss's of5ce.cxpcct-
ing never to see mm again: bm to my most acute surprise he r#ctul'n¢d
beaming smiles. heartily shook my hand and lhankcd me for prom0~
ting his writings. A minute later my boss came with Mukerjee's pile,
and. avoiding my eyes. told my to "groom in up here and there."
Mukerlee go: 250 rubles. und I. who llltimatelywrole his works. not a
 Q

Dedicated "stepsons" of Communism visiting Kremlin with

the nulhor.

57
 58
kopeck. He proved a prolific no persistent writer, though not exces-
sively particular. He would describe the functions of a factory union
without ever having visited one. supplying statistics from memory
and ifm8iI\2\fi¢\h. serving no refrrenees. It was my job to reconcile hie
facts and figtlres with those already officially published.
As the youngest editor and Igor only '°acttve"4:riemologist my fate
was sealed. Within two months I was losing weight, had become
mrvmts. and contemplated sinister designs against comrade
Mtlkerjee
The opportunity to avenge myselfcamesuddenly. Ourdepartmenl
treated a large group of' "progressive" writers and journalists from
Asia. Africa and Latin America toa little reception. AS iscustomary.
the guests talked themselves out. in praise of the Soviet Communist
Party. The director of Novosti. in reply, modestly admitted that,
indeed, the Soviet Union was the greatest, wealthiest, justest and
freect of cou nu-ies. and. as itwss also the most peaceful. it was always
willing to help a national liberation struggle wherever it might occur.
The guests clapped, and some young girls presented them with Lenin
badges. The party retired to the "eluted"dining room. where gallons
of vodka were pumped into them. I acted as an interpreter for some
of the Novosti dinectorlsjokes, tearing for try job if they did not elicit
laughter. When we wen filing into the dining hall, I noticed the lone-
ly figure of the Indian admirer of Soviet freedom. He was clutching n
fresh bouquet of typewritten pages. A dark demonic evil possessed
me.
Aim- ofiieial lonulho bis boa~ faded ew\y.i¢oving tlteguests in
the capable hands of the junior staff. We knew our business perfectly
well. and sang revolutionary songs. taught the words:
Qtr rouser.l' lair war: ¢n¢p.»,.
I don? know am' other
l»l'fter¢ d mow an breathe :lo_/kc ... 44 after#
I quietly assiuled at bottfu of' vodka in its struggle for Iibcruion.
finding some smOke salmon and a can of caviar for the other
pocket. then hall carried Muktlrjol w the door. It would have bvcn
too cruel of' me to knvc him in theslreets of' Moe vow in such a deca-
dent sum. so I drove him home. leaving Iiitherh license plates con-
spicuomtly outside.
Comrade Mukerjeei apanmem was.altho\agl\ lndianined. typical
of bachelor's apartments everywhere: the stench of' unwashed
clothes. mon ruin of unwashed dishes in :he kitchen sink. books on
the floor, a little crowd of empty bottles under the desk: then . few
distinctive lentunest in tlnilushed toilet, pnnnit; of Marx and
Brezhnev. and a small oval silver rared photograph of an Indian
girl with tarp, clever Bengali eyes. His daughter?
I hesitated frilly Whnue fault was it, alter aIL that comrade
Mnkerjee had turitcd instr a Po-nt? He mistook the pause for dis-
 so
pleasure With the mess of his apartment, and smiled
"This, as you may sec, is a temporary dwelling. In a year or two 111
be coming back to my homeland. a new and independent Rangla-
deshl"
"Yes," l said. to say Something.
"But you should not think that we do not appreciate your hospita-
lity and brotherly assistance. We'Il never Forget this. even when we
come to power and build a glorious society, like yours ..."
Mukorjcc fell silent. and I worked over my plan. His npariment
would be bugged, as were all apartments of comrade revolutionaries
from foreign countries. but that did not mean anyone would be
listening. To make sure that the conversation would be overheard. I
reached for the telephone. The usual buzz started after a lag of only
three seconds. To make sure I had someone's attention. I dialed my
oflioe number. and allowed Eve rings. The next stage was to deliver
comrade Mukerjee into a state of inebriation still more adva need .
and, from my cynical experience with "progressive" prostittltcs. pro-
voke him into :mil-Soviet remarks.
"The Indian delegates complained today.°lsaid 1. "that we Soviets
are too friendly to Indira Go rtdhi's government. and not attentive
enough to the needs of the Communist Party of India."
"Ol1. that's an old song; the split of CPI was the beginning ...
undermining the anti-imperialist front. "
I thought that comrade M ukerjee was not yen drunk enough no run
out ofclichcs. If hedid not run out of' cliches. I would have no end of
his articles. Embracing him. in a brotherly way. I pound two more
glass's. Mukerjee drnnk.and. pleased by myattentiom showered mc
with names. dates and events. 1 learned that there were several Com-
munist parties in East Pakistan (too many. I thought. for one
developing country). that the real Communists were only those who
follow professor Ahmed. as opposed to the followers of Allaudin and
Bis vas; und God help the followers of Muhttmmed Toho and Abdul
Hoq. the Mooiaia!
"We are developing strongpro-M oscow party. and we arable lO
establish ourselves as the strongest force in the universities."
Alas. the volume ofvod kg in comrade Mukerjee was not in inverse
proportion to the amount of his dedication, l fell upon another tac-
tic. Was the Soviet role in East Pakistan greater than comrade
Mukcrjcc implied? And. could 1 get him to talk about a subject secret
enough that his discussing it would bring him fatally bed marks in
school"
°'Okay, Bi:.hnu." said I in my friendlies! manner "do you think
that you Eusv. Pakistani Communists can bypass violence and terror
on the road to independence and socialjustke? Remember our histo-
ry. For the purity of our Lxeninist norms we had lo gO through the
 so
purifying fire of' civil war and purged. You think the Bengali Com-
munisls can avoid this?"
'°Avoid'?" (and here he became dramatic). "Who says we need lo
avoid revolutions ry terror? No. comrade. we must lead. control.
channelile it! You cannot even imagine the ability of our proktarial
and our revolutionaries to mobilize for a decisive armed suugglc"°
(I could very well imagine that. somewhere in the villages and
workers' townships, :he agizaxor-s had the red paint wailing to put
hammers and sickle: on the walls. and many Ions of booklets pro-
pagaring class struggle and revolutionary violence. printed in the
USSR. flown daily to the subcontinent in the diplomatic cargo of
Aerollota I could imagine picture boxes with ammunition and
Kalashnikov Machine-guns.)
"Our propaganda cells operate in every university center." he said.
counting on his lingers. -4We have prepared and trained cadre; uI
party adininintrntors. we have military training for capable boys. we
have prepared lists ollalI the opposizionckmcnls. The brollucrly help
of the Soviet Union and India wil! provide us with imcmnliunal
recognition and ideological support. even al lhc United Nations."
"And then everything will be lip-top"" l asked saltasliuully.
Mukerjee shook his long thin finger at me.
"I know what you an: thinking about. No. wcauc not Lhasa naive.
We II ndersla nd that political indcpcndcnoc is only the fir sl purl of the
struggle. Resistance of subversive and imperialist elements is laker
into consideration. Thanks lo your people and your Couaullalllls we
have :1 vast re education progrnrrl ... and a plan tO go: rid ut rho
enemies of the people."
"'Re-education programs. oh""
"Yes, comrade' Labor lurid monkey into man."
" Labor camps. then. "
"Can it labor Camps." Mukcrjec said peacefully.
"And what about the listed `cnemics""
"Historically inevitable," sighed Mukcijec. and mad: all inxcrnzl-
tionally known gesture of n linger pulling trigger off maicliine-gun.
"We1L" said I. "l1I drink to that!" I filled Lhe glasses to their brims.
pushed one into my comradcls hand. and toasted a fl be and indepen-
dent Banglmicsh. l www vod kg into myself. almonl Ilcarillg Ihc hiss
of ihc liquor on the red coals inside mc. In in munleul. Me Flame
caught up. burning the tcmnants of my 11 urea uuuipassion. Another
tonal to the unity of prognnssivc inaulniiid. UI nu: l.u liillcn comrades.
Until Muketjec began to cry. loc held my hulnJ. as it' randy 10
confess. In 'a mumble he reklted no me :had when he was a student he
was rejected by that lovely girl. that one with lhc clever eyes. His
parents tried to arrange the murriagc. bllt his caste was no mulch for
hers. In revenge. he insisted that one of his comrades. a mililalll
 81
terrorist. "take care" or me girl. She was found read. and m~pw. in
the dormitory. Comrade M ukerjce lost his potency from the shock;
he had become a homosexual.
l look nis hand off my tipper. poured me res: of the vodka Hom
me bottle directly mm his throat. and let the liberator of Bengal
unconscious on the carpet.
s¢=u¢#s

The next morning I fell as ill had spent the nigh! in so garbagecun.
I stood under the shower much longer than usual. trying lo wash
away the mvmnries. I did nnl lrnnw whether I should be pleased at
letting Mtlkerjer say what he was not supposed tO say. thus getting
rid of him and his articles fm good, nrwhelher I should start toworry
about myself, for the KGB might as easily get curious about my
curiosity. To be sure. I called Vadim Smirnov. my one and only
contact within the "highest seat of' power," the Central Committee.
We met during the lunch break in the garden in front of the CC build-
ing in Norina square. The day, by contrast to my mood. was sunny
and warm.
"Old man." said I. "your advise and maybe your help is needed.
You know.perh:ips. a Bengali Comrnunistcalled Bishnu Mukcrjee. a
student at the High Party School."
"So'?"
"I have made him dr1.lnk it a Novosti banquet. and them boozed
with him till three in the morning at his apartment. discussing poli-
tics."
"Well," said the apparatchik. "let's hope the newsdols not reach
Makhotin. You really should know better. And what do you want
from me?"
"l um afraid l made Mukerjee talk too much. and supposing his
apartment it hnggud ..."
"Nor supposing. it it: bugged. So. what did he say?"
"Well. I guess you can verify what I say with the KGB. but I 4.1 n
you, that witllotll .No provocation on my pan ..."
"Of course." smirked Smirnov.
'°... Only joumaliuic curiosity. The damn Bengali told me tlml o
socialist revolution Is being brod up in East Pakistan with our
help"
"So what?"
"So this. " And I told him the whole story: East Pakistani radicals
mined in KGB schools. lots oi'"enemies of the people" to be caucu-
ted after | kltist coup. invasion of Indian armed forces with our
encouragement. and ideological and political "protection" of the
newly-bom "Peopkk Republic of Bangladesh" in lho United
Nations and through a World-wide propuiganOa csfnpaign orchestra-
 62
red by Agitprop. I also mentioned the homosexuality of' the old
revolutionary.
"Holy cow." said the referent-indologist. "this M ukcijee of yours..
sorry. of ours ... has a great inngination. How much you poured
into him?" he asked indilTerem.ly. but I noticed a spark of intclcst in
his eyes.
"Oh. about 500 grams. not more. `°
"WelL no wonder he had sick ideas. You forget :hat Asians cannot
hold liquor ... Look. lsuggcst you forget the whole damn thing. Buy
him a drink next time he comes to Novosti. make friends. but keep
away from your amateur intelligence tricks and drunken politics.
that is. it' you want to keep your Novostijob." (He stressed "Novos-
1i"). "And don't think much about Mukcrjccls sick fiction."
"W hat in the KGB starts thinking about it? They must be working
on the tapes by now."
"So what" If they approach you. give them some psychological
boloney. as you can do. Or simply tell them the truth. Thc rest is up to
you . . . you know .. ."
"Okay."
"And call mc if you get into a real mess."
"Right-o."
mums
Bishnu Mukcrjcc never came again lo Novosti with his opuses.
Instead one day a pleasant, voice on the phone asked me no meet
comrade Major Sidorov of the KGB in room 935. hotel Moskva. for
an informal talk.
400944

To the committee ofsrare securi(l'Q/IIhe Soviet ofMimkrers qfrhe

Union of the Soviez Socialist Republic frown Citizen qflhe USSR
Bermenov, Y`¢lf°i Alexandrnvirh. born f 939. member of CPSU. card
number .... prexmfr an editor of Nawysli Press Agenqv. depar!-
mvm ...
"W¢ll. you do not have to be that formal." said Major Sidorov
tenderly. looking over my shoulder at what I had written. Just use
your own words. And the main point should be your own conscious
decision to cooperate with
' the Committee. Then. perhaps. a oou ple
I of technicnliti~ ..."
Eduard jovanovich Sidorov was wry polite. Hcgneeted me warmly.
but m`tho\u familiarity. Not a him of bkdtmail. no mentioning of'
the Multerjee affair. He said the Committee knows and values my
experience in tinting foreign guests of' Novosti. Understanding.
goodheartedneas. humanism. respectability - these were the
tubes MajorSidm-ovwastrying toexpresus on his far-like face. One
annel. using all his imagination. associate this modest man with
 63
some 60 odd millions of my countrymen (the entire populations of
two European nations) shot. frozen, beaten, tortured lo death by
"the Committee." And while he was talking to me in a soft voice.
soinewhcle beyond the windows of the luxury hotel Moakvn, beyond
the barbed wire border of my Motherland. the colleagues if com
made Siclorov went on to shoot, poison, rape, subvert. sabotage,
brainwash. blackmail. corrupt and do many other impolite things in
the name of the most just new society in the history of mankind. and
to provide for the security of its leaders - a small group of aged men.
fat and flabby from overeating and alcohol. often senile, but d¢ter~
mined and cruel. who parasite on my nation and call themselveVser .
wants of the people." Major Sidorov wanted me to signadocument.
Wttifying myself as an accomplice.
"All right." 1 said agreeably. -~l'n write it in my own wot°ds.l°And
un a clean sheet of paper l wrote:
f, Yuri A!uundlovirII Bczmrnv v. volunteer to I4° the KGB in
.surveillance vffbrtiign visilont Q/'A PN andfordgn media representa-
dves residing it: my country ...
"Yes. tllb is bcllcr, but still rather artificial. The words should
cum: l'IOIII your heart," said the Major.
From my heart.
I Iruve an ubliguliuu ru report my obser various onjbneiguersi .we
pevwd un un_v ucaiuns /ram;/ui to my cvunlr.1', personally to comrade
Sidurvv in legular written reports. Sigfrtrf ...
"Hen: you should take an assumed name. to protect your privacy."
said Sidorov with an apologct ic smile.
"Oh, 1ha1's okay with mc. 111 lake the name of' °Musafirov. "
"Sounds like a Tartar."
"Arabic. Oh. by the way. what do l write about remuneration'?"
"Eh. done write a nylhing yet. But to be clear. the Committee will
over all your expenses while tretnihg a Foreigner. when you provide
us with a de taiicd bill."
"Oh. I ac I said. showing mild disappointment. and signed the
4ocumcnt: " M usofirov. "
"I wonder what does the name mean." said Sidorov. folding the
paper and stuffing it into his pocket rather disrespectfully.
"Musallir." I said. "means rider from "saur."
I was now working purl-time for the KGB. I hoped I will be smart
enough to Luke the KGB for a ride.
Tomas Schuman with a copy up' "Look" magazine he helped to produce
as a Novosti manipulator. Below' Look' s idea of 'Russian fashion'
inspired by Novosti manipulatom. 'All is fine in Soviet Rubina after SO
years of Consmunbnf -- that was the message.
 as

A RIDE FOR LOOK MAGAZINE

On June 2. 1967. I was summoned by the directorial board of
Novosli. who entrusted me with "a very responsible job." A large
group of' Look staff were in the country on a special mission. to pre-
pare material for a special issue dedicated to the 50th anniversary of
Soviet power. They were actually paying Novosti, according to
contract. for the "services" we would provide.
My immediate boss during :he trip wasappointed from the section
for English-speaking countries. He was Valeri Neyev, a tall sleepy
looking fellow of some forty years. Hcspoke litneofanything. inclu-
ding English. but had been quickly promoted because he was only
working part -time, his other responsibility was to the KGB. I was to
report all details to him. with a written report at the end of the trip. in
lnlplicale.
On the same day. I was introduced to a group of good~looking.
extremely sociable Americans. They Sal in the National restaurant.
d iscussing their trip into the second hour of their wail for chicken-a-
I8-Kiev. I thought that "normalization" had done wonders for their
patience.
My future observes was Philip Harrington. middle-aged. middle-
sized. and with a face that looked too intelligent for a photographer,
al least by Novosti slander rd. He proved to be. as well. very demand-
ing, capricious. nervous. unintuitive :Md ttnobservant. From the [intl
day he asked too much of the Soviet bureaucracy. expecting service
for money as if he were in Europe. or Asia. or Africa. Ht: was as
inconsistent as a teenage girl in love. ptesenung me with a list of
places and persons to photograph that would take the KGB weeks to
app rove, the next day forgetting his list to insist upon spontaneity. I
assumed that he had been told always to ask for more than you w'¢tnL
leaving a margin ion' diplomatic retreat. This would be the wrong
approach: in Soviet Russia you take what you can get.
Near Volgograd (formerly Stalingrad). despite my polite recom-
mcndatton that he tarry br a while, he insisted upon taking forbid-
dcn panoramic plclurcs from the Mamayev Hill. How could I him to
him that a KGB shadow was approaching?
Near the Volgogrand Refinery he insisted upon stopping the taxi
lo photograph a long and rusted barbed wire fence. Did flt he realize
that our driver was as KGB informer?
In Simpheropol. be very nearly revived the Cold War by photo-
graphrng some high lransmissmn lmcs. He would not even wait for
the driver to go for a pee. 'the RUB would conclude that he was
tracing the inland rondsand utility lines tospyand subversion camps
near Simpheropol. where inmemsnionnl terrorists ure trained.
In yalta. he photographed a highway clover-leafand a bus station.
Was he trying to pick out foreign laces that might be from the spy

-:.
~..
 es
camps. on holiday in Yalta 10 screw Russian gin Is (a stllldlrd reward
for loyalty lo Moscow)'? Surely he should know Um the Third
World? libentora are lransponed only at night.
If Philip was will: :he CIA. llroy forgot lu Uuiu llilll. No nw11¢
bow many clues I would dfcr, he failed m in shut I was aay|||w4hi-
zcf. llc wuM his film on WoW stones. crabs under wales nM
children swimmlmg. Ile didn't own bozWr with llle fucuiyI-Iovki4
man. put the barbed wire. 1`u11hcr uplh: eN. and lx msyIIuiw
ly surpésd win we wen both told lo go look for claMc llm.
I wnnzd m avoid mM "cloacd"plno=s. but Abu to avoid icwm of
smiling milkmaids enjoying AM happy Soviet life. Mingunimagina-
bk dilly irk ks. playing MMQM-XCk with twat Party aW KGB
dmininmon. l WM to miss the Nypkal"wllwliw farms and
woolens' houses. Me "museums M the lcvululioll." all of' them
M t o ; Mm : tourists. Still. I remembered the iustmciiom.
went llol Lou fur from the official rourke. and am my own pwtmlon
made notes of all of Mr. HarrlmIon's doubtful pictures.
In Volgograd. he wasted moral full»ul film Ur tlru hug sled and
comma stawc of' :he 1u1l-b nM Mmlrul Russia. who stands as
high as the Statue of Liberty. like a mad wurtmu with urn overdose of'
homonym bnnudMin¢ a sword for the Sovict foncirm 1Wn1. Al the
hydro station. a hundred url of 0 turbirw hall. Ill uuglr the
ailing of on overhead bM. In hpmzhyt. sparks flying fr um a
smclrcr. And in the only advanced colkctivc farm I failed to avoid..
smiling milkimM. Come& hncv worM shed his bra if llc
mm 1MN to soc that she was milii4 the cow with her hands, mm:-
thing thcv
_ don`\ do in the Wo!'ld's Moll Advanced Country. Fo
'0|'1U-
only e kept her hands out of LM frame.
In Arteek we visited B W M' ¢iMmn'9 on. where pink-
chuockd pion nm had bean M MW sdocted to We wen in a
"super modern" building: I failed to being Mr. IInrringlon's allen-
tion to deep enc ks on the wall..n 'uucresting detail as the building
was on n steep grade of clay. overlooking the lllnck Sea. in an area
which experience: heavy rains.
All in all. Mr. la rrington did not correspond an all lo the ima,g'eol'
the "sinister imperialist atoogc. sniffing at Soviet garbage cut for
defamatory material about our glorious country." Neither 1.h¢ truth.
nor the garbage. bothered his imagination.
On the Rkiek Se.. I pointed out an old num, in faded military
trousers. I torn tee-shirt and a mow hat tilted back a-lu-KruallcI1c\»,
his erulchu leaned against B cement urn. full org: rbagc; on his lap a
newspaper with his meal: a sliced picitlcd cucumber. a piece of rye
bread. and several slices of' cheap bologna kielbnsu. In his trouser
pocket could use the empty and olla Mickey ofvodk.. The newspa-
per's llaciGlt headline was. 'lt should not over be repeated in the
 67

43-1
44.*

fk_.~{

543 °*£°Z\: »-is

Propaganda monument ill Volgograd (above) as presented by the "lack"

msuyazine; Sclillman (centre) with group of American guests, including
Lock's photographer Phillip Harrlngton. who took the pictures for
the propaganda issue of look magazhle.
I
 68
world: Soviet veterans of' war say."
"H urry up. I said carefully. take it!" Philip smiled. and clicked one
of his cameras a couple of times But before he had rewound his
camera, the ugliest of Russials subjects, in gray gaberdine and white
shirt sleeves. sandals and socks full of sand, had crept up behind us.
tapping me on the shoulder with a rolled newspaper.
"Young man. you are the translator with the foreigner? Are you
not?"
°*l am."
"Why then do you allow him to make fun and deIlameourpeople?'°
"Citizen! " said I, sternly, "Citizenl You will not obstruct the work.
You will address all your questions to my superior. Is that clear?"
The informer was taken aback; he hissed, but did not press any
further. He escorted us to our hotel, twenty feet to the side. disap-
nearing into its side entrance with the air of a busvanddecisive man.
After lunch. Philip went to his room to cimnge film and mke a
shower. I was approached by a babushka-dezhurnqwl (old lady serr-
trY}. the key lady of the floor. Pursing her lips sadly. babushka told
me phase lo drop into room number 20, and talk to comrade. Com-
rade turned out to be an openI tiwry rabotnik. a KGB supervisor of
the local Intourist branch. tall, ugly and too young to look fearsome:
he was trvimz to play a bit part in a Soviet spy movie. After half an
hour of pregnant pauses. he asked.
"Why is the American so interested in untypical elements of Soviet
life? Whv doesn't he take the photographs advised by lntourist?"
I trip to be very polite tO this young protector of my nations
oppressors.
"Bcinga Novosti editor. lam well away: what is good and what is
had for Soviet propaganda. Moreover. so rlo my superiors, who are
being instructed by the Central Committee's Department of' Agita-
lion and propaganda. All the filmwill ho"oditmt " by our people.and
all the uttlypical pictures will he replaced by typical ones. For doubt.
l'ul cases. I keep n record of every single shot "
1 showed him my notebook to prove my point. bm that was a
mistake. as it was in a code of my own devising He demanded an
immediate transcription.
"Sorry," I said. with utmost compassion, "that I cannot do. I ant
subordinated directly and only to my KGB contact, Major Neyev.
and I submit my reporrr directly and only to him."
We nm-red open enemies. He promised to report me IO Moscow.
recommending that l never be permitted to work with foreigners
again. I promised to tell Moscow about the obatmctionof the Yalta
KGB. I know not whether he ever made good on lik threat. but I
know that I did on mine: five pages in three copies the moment I
returned to Moscow,
 69
In the m°od that I was kl mih. lapoilcd myrclauonship with Mr.
!-lamington. This was done over dinner. He had noticed my encoun-
ter with an stranger that morning. He did not wam any ruble with
the KGB.and said that I should know better what nm undo. lshould
concanrat: my cfforls on arranging "inlctesuing visits"nnd "interest-
ins objects" for phomgxaphy.
'We have rather different ideas about whal is inns~sting." I said.
"I mean interesting from IM point of view of Amnricnn sender
and the editors d' Look magazine."
"lt is dilTicult for me to see what this mignon II¢,"I cnnlinued. "1 acl-
dom gel a chance to know either.'°
"You ac: Mr. Harrington said in an irrimled lone. "the munaga-
rent of Look mauarjne is spending I foflllne for this trip. including
the expense of' an intcmlleter. whelhcr we rand one or not ..."
"So what?"
"So. lntourist und Novosti charge us fnrcertain son-iccs. which we
agree no MY for. they 8g86 to render. and ac seldom see ..."
"Oh. iS mar so"
"Yes. And what makes me mad is. that wear: doing ihejob. paying
our money. beslcally in \he interests of your country. to Qhow lhc
aehlevelncms of' the hot fifty work, in a Innllful way."
"Mr. }'Iarrin¢ton."l titled IN be calm "Is is not I who oeublirh the
rate of charges for Inlourisl or Nrwnsni or decide what volume of
services is to be ronllend."
'°Maybc. but LE you who arrange: boring visits no kindorgarterrr.
and museums. How many mnserrme and kindergarten; can one
nM\ omm?°
"Again you are wrong. Mr Hn rrington. The progr-uns and routes
are established at a higher kvcl. I only show you around. II you do
not want boring visits m Mn<eum1. you. or your management.
should bargain with my bnssns hefnlc you pay money. You Amen-
icIllll are supposed to N: good hxrgzlincrs. [Joni blame me for the
spinekssncss of your fosses. My Amy it lo implement on ll1¢ local
level what you have decided with my bosses. That's all."
"Well maybe you are right." said Philip n lone lower, "but mn'¢
you understand wlm I want? you un: u journalism. Try to me my
point and understand No my ediwr expects work up to :he
slandanls of the mzlga\vinr.."
"Try to sec my pninr. Mr Harrington. The management of APN
expocls mc to show you our 'ar.11iu'rml.>nt1.' howcvor boring they
seem Lo you. wmn an I dn? Ilse me the way you sec til. but remem-
bcr. my bosses arc in Mosnnw "
"Y¢s. I sec." said Philip in an almnsl friendly mm. bun try \o be
mon active. pmlccl me from ahneac Norn propaganda visits. from
embarrasing situations. Show me more."
.|,°.
4..|
 70
"Philip," I said in my friendlies: voice. "believe me. i nm trying to
show you much more than is prescribed by our propaganda. I am
desperate to show you my country in a true light. the way we
Russians we our land."
"Thank you. But I would prefer lo photograph your country the
way Americans can understand it. You probably know that our
government is actively following the policy of "rlormalizalion." We
want to follow this policy moo. although our pica is less dependent
upon government policy. We try lo understand your problems as a
growing nation, but, believe me, neither I nor the editors of Look
magazine want fights with APN or KGB over one-lagged old inva-
lids. Do you follow me?"
"Yes." I said nftera thoughtful pause. "yes, Mr. Harrington. But as
a journalist, I understand. l hope. that an honest journalist must be
intelwted in everything: turbines. statues. war veterans ... perhaps
even high voltage utility lines and country roads. which, as you per-
fectly know. are 'not for foreigners' eyes"
l caught the eye of our waitress and asked for 200 grams of vodka.
which came much faster than the food. I explained that I was paying
for the vodka out of my own pocket. not from the Look magazine
account. Mr. Harrington seemed to be offended.
"I am Sony to rowed so demanding. but as you may klruw. I spent
My first two weeks here with your colleague. Mr. Ncyev. He seemed
to me more active. efficient and scriou* about his job. llc was muclt
more helpful than you."
"PhlIip. 1 said, swallowing vodka and pride "vuu an: not very
observant. You miss a very important point ` : Neycv is older and
higher. I do not have as ma ny 'eonnectionrf-"
"I have nOtibcd that." said Philip. "but I also foci illl¢lilivuly that
your attitude towards your duly in different. You arc lcsa dedicated."
'°Mr. Harrington. " I sipped some more vodka. risking my career.
anti even my freedom. "I must. explain to you. that my and Mr.
Ncycvla 'duty` is not to help you do honest work. but lo prevent you
from seeing the real [acc of' my land. of which our leaders are
ashamed. for reasons beyond our dis: ussion. lt is my leaders. not mc.
who don'r. give a shit for the 'normalilation' so dear to your presi-
dent`s heart. All they want is your money. and having that. they use
you as a vchielc for our propaganda. I bop: youlI understand this
some day. before it is too late."
There wan a long, pause. after which Ml. Hal ringlun :id hesitan-
ly. "Don't you think that you interpret the intentions; and actions of
your government rather subjectively and supcrGcialIy?"
(He is a 'lefrisrl l thought with hon'or, why have I luuscncd my
tongue with this whm*c")
"As 1 say. my work is to obstruct your work, by pumping prupar-
 11
panda into your cameras, and also ... ( I paused hopelessly) by k=¢v-
ing track of all your 'secret' photographs for the KGB --all those
stupid bridges. power lines. bus stations. military installations, etc.,
so that your Iilm can be 'exposed my mistake' before you cross the
USSR border. Donq: you know what' Docs your CIA not tell you
these things before you come here? We are all controlled by the
KGB! There are no private tourist guides or intcrprctert4!"
"Y¢$. I know all that. Donlt take me for a total fool." said Philip
peacefully. "but please, don't try to scare me. I am not so sure that
your KGB is as much worried about my IsecretI picture-taking as
some over-zealous translators like you "
"I would not be so sum"
"The main thing is: docs Novosti Press Agency want Look maga-
zine to publish the 50th Jubilee material?"
"Only that which Agitprop wants: and in the way they want."
"Okay, suppose you are right. But wanting that, they would never
bother exposing my films They need it to be safe more than we in.
Besides. if they steal my Mm. they won't be able to develop it. It's 8
secret Kodak process made only by US companies."
"Oh.Mr. Harrington. you grossly underestimate our KGB!"
"Oh. Mr. Bezmenov. you grossly underestimate our Kodak!"
There was no sense in arguing any further. We sat and stared at
each other in disgust. vodka glasses raised above dirty dishes
"Sorry I am in such a fighting mood tonight." I said, *it's because
of that obnoxious stranger in the park. the KGB."
"Yes. I see." said Philip. as though he saw.
"But in I were you. I would still pass some of the film m some other
American. who leaves the USSR separately. Ym: never know."
"Okay, H1 do lhalt."said Philip in the voice olonc who wastired of'
arguing,
We walked to our respective deluxe and first-class suites in the
Yang lnlourist Hotel. paid for out of' the Inn' magazine account.

Aitcr all the slumping of military Prada and peopkls demon-

slralinm w4err fwfr. after the Qrhimphrenic foaling with phallus.
mm mekeruin Red Square. alla the soviet pmpagna Miss md ranishea
bullshitting and the western commentators' respectful gossipping
was done. u dnnnmrrn nl' the fnlkwfing mnrent appeared on mydesk
al Novfxni-
Ercerpr Dior APN Parry Bureau? mering nsolzulon.
'He .rubjec-I under dismuion Con ngunda):
Rcpmn on Ihr- rnnlls nfprnpaymrla rampaigndedicated
to the wh anniversary nl' the Greai Ocmher Socialist
Revalulinn.
 72
For excellent work in the process of thejubilee campaign,
particularly with foreign organsofmass media - namely
preparation of press materials truthfully reflecting the
glorious achievements of our Motherland in an historic-
ally short period olltime,and for successful publication of
the materials in the organs of foreign mass media. the
Party Bureau recommends that the managcmcntofAPN
compliment (with the proper registration in personnel
mies) the following employees of APN'
BEZMENOV, Yuri Akxandrovich. -- for preparation
of photographic material and accompanying of a corres-
pondent of Look magazine (IIS A)
In the lower right-ham! corner of the paper there was a red pencil
remark. in the handwriting of our lnral Party boss' 'Com. Bezmenov!
Drop into Union oflioe. There'st za Imrrisl tiekr.-1 to Italy for Novern
ber.'
with pounding heart I in to our "dosed" library, where seerct
foreign periodicals are kept (such as Time. Life, Playboy, Popular
Mechanics. The New York Times. Worker? Daily, Morning Star,
L'Humauile. Parris, Aka-Hara) AI'ler years of loyal work for
Novosti and a trip Ahmad. and after I had been admitted as a mem-
ber of the Communism Party nfthz USSR, l had finally been given I
"permit" allowing me limited access to such material. Hurriedly I
filled in a request form and in fifteen minutes had a copy of Look
magazine in my hands.
Above a background of ReN Square. Tim SL Basil Cathedral. and
the tasteless sugar-cuhe of the Rossia Hotel. lhore were the following
headlincsz
50 YEARS AFTER THF REVOLUTION THAT CHANG ED
THE WORLD
-- The new freedoms
Fear of China
- Upheaval in e¢lucalion
A Iaste of profit
-- Siberia since Stalin
--- How we ink m them
- Bikinis. hal lrrinas.
. bliss
- An aclive issue on RUSSIA TODAY
I opened the magazine to the lead article. The first luv lines
sntellcd oE` Our propaganda morgue. I re-read dmc lines many times.
trying to convince rnyself that I was misunderstanding something,
that perhaps I did nM catch the meaning of same expression.
"it works. Ponderously. fi1IIIIIly. unevenly. But SO 5-cant
after the revolution that changed the world Forever. the
system it fostered wheezes with /Yif. We strain to ht-.az the
 '¢¢1'9-pr 73

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Nest demnnmtic election were held in the Soviet Union

today-involving legitimate allcmalives, sufficient time
[If and opportunity for their exposure and the assurance
that those elected would serve-the Communist party would
win. This is not speculation. It is a conclusion based on
on -the-spot observglion and interviews by ten Loox editors Ind
photographers whose journeys through the
\\Soviet Union for th is issue totaled more than a year
.._._...--""' . -
z

Leonard Gross in the "Look". Did not he know that there

is only ONE party in the USSR? Did he really believe.
that my PEOPLE would vote to paws the Perry, thni Inu!-
dered some 66 millions of my Countrymen?
 74
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This is what Mr.Gross writes today. I have a better questi-

on for Me literary critic; "How many US citizens ARE
Communist bedllellows?"
 75
sounds ofdiscord and seize oneyery setback; but itlstime
to ponder somedisconeerring realities. Grurnps therese.
and struggles - bitter struggles fought by angry. frustra-
ted men, Yet. implausible as it seems to us. most Soviet
citizens think they h ve a good thing going for them.
They fed safe. (!) They don't worry about h Unger or lone-
liness or calamity. Raised in a controlled environmtnt.
they are without objective measure.but by their own
meager reckoning of what constitutes freedom, most of
them now feel free. POLITICAL TERROR HAS
SIIRIVELLED. The indices by which men everywhere
gauge progress are rising. To the average Soviet citizen.
no conceivable space spectacular planned for thcjubilee
year could surpass the importance of what is happening
on earth ..."
Had the Americans gone cuckoo?
'H an honest democratic election were held in the Soviet
Union today -- involving legitimate alternatives, suffi-
cient time and opportunity for their exposure and the
assurance that those elected would serve - the Commu-
nist party would win. This is not speculation, lt is a con-
clusion based on on-the-»spot observations and interviews
by ten Look editors and pltologra phers whose journeys
through the Soviet Union for this issue totaled more
than Zi year."
This was an insult to the intelligence of my countrymen. Official
facts ran through the issue. without accreditation. Captions tasted of
the Novosti kitchen. A fabricated Novosti public opinion poll was
placed beside a real American one to show that Russians know more
about the United States than Americans know about Russia. A
Soviet-Amerkan mountaineering team jointly climbed Mount
Lenin. sytnbolizing "nomlaliunion.'° American fur Iashions were
exhibited on Soviet models. as ii' they were available in the Son jct
Union. They posed before religious monuments in flagrant dis-
USU=CL Vodka. caviar, blind and sturgeon were depicted almost as
typical fare. Dissident: were said to d isagreca bout means only. never
ends. And. for balance, it was admitted that the KGBdocs sometimes
engage in harmless misehiefabroad (only): a one-page article men-
tioned this, without the aid of pictures.
l had thought this sort of operation was possible only in India and
some African countries. A black mood came over me.
l needed the trip to Italy.
 7s
NO BIRDS WITH TWO STONES
The link of May is one of those holidays in the Soviet Union when
everyone works. but the calendar is marked "Day of the Soviet
Press." to honor "the most truthful in the world. " Atabout 7 p. m. on
this day. in 1968. I had Mr. Mohan Kumaramangalam to supperat
stare expense. As a director of A ir India and an old friend and fellow
traveIler,' he merited an lntourist restaurant. with bright candelah.
ras and marble columns. rather as if the League of Nations had been
converted into a railway station.
On our table. in a cut-glass edlective grave. lay several fhmtsand
unborn beluga. decorated with a Hag of the Republic of India.
Around them. bottles of mineral water. cognac and Soviet cham-
pagne ("the best of' the world") observed a minute: of silence. Some-
where in the depths of a noisy kitchen. an unfortunate chicken pro-
pared to :met us "a-la- Kiev." A twenty~piece orchestra conspired to
inhibit our digestion. while a whom-out lady singer. and her three
chins, reported that Moscow is the best city in the world.
A glass of eognacwas poured. for several purposes- to welcomethe
guest to the USSR. to anticipate his visit to the Soviet Asian repub-
lics. to celebrate thecultural acltievementsoftheS¢wict Asian repub-
li |Ain expectation of the book whkh the guest had promised to write
about the cultural achievements of the Soviet Asian republics. and to
toast the no-operation and friendship of the peoples of India and the
USSR. By way of introducing myself. I told Mr K umarsmangnlam
that my own childhood was spcm in Kavakhsmn during the Great
Patriaic War (World War II to Western readers) while my father,
later an olliccr of the General Seal. dot"cnrh~d the Mother-Iamd else-
where. I was Rlad that I would accompany nurguest to the land of my
childhood.
Mr. Kumammangalam responded that his life was also related 10
war. inasmuch as his brother was a aencml and f`hi¢~f~ot-staff of the
Indian Army.
l remarked than my life. character and ideology were strongly in-
lluenced by the ascetic Military Spirit (it Was a gross lie). Moreover.
after I graduated fromsccondaryachnnl my Father insist that join
the Army Academy and becomezn officer. acaxeerthat until recent-
ly had been the dream of' every Soviet youth (another lie).
Mr. Kumaramanzalam respunrlnrl thru in his family the military
spirit wasn't very popular.

I Kunnranhnnhm had lulllnml :| bank scluhratmg :ho !i¢wi<:l fuk lull: Iil\lI.lin¢
of 1h¢ Unix-d Sauimuc as curly as N41 &Md\an Kunnmmaneahm The ww..J
nnrlaut. luonlluy. l'wplcls PuHkhiq Haiuc 19411. Amwdilg1u his lik eulmikd by
A P35-KGII. M. Kwnmnmlngahm he cuIolualxly §!WonM Sou cl l'l1l'¢ign pdiry
n 1h¢ der¢4¢»l»b»x worm musing as nmulliped. vi. one.
 71
After two or three more such exchanges I asked who was more
important in his family. the Chief-ol3Statl` M the director ofAlr India?
Could Mohan Kumaramangalam influence his brotheror vice versa?
"Each ... it is diflieult 10 say. In India. as you probably know, the
system is different. The military traditionally stays ou: of politics.
and. as a matter of fact, so should the civil service. "
"Oh yes. that is the British tradition. if! am right, but in several
former British colonies the military have playeda ratheractive row in
politics. Can they not rule if they wish?"
"In India, it is highly improbable."
So I changed the subject. and we discussed the route of our fllhlrn
trip. Mr. Kumaramangalam was most interested in Samarkand and
Bukhara. but was not unwilling to inspect irrigalionditdics in 1.11h¢-
kistan and Turkmenia. The dinner passed in such a "warm and
cordial atmosphere of mutual understanding"tlm it was hard tosay.
after tak jdutee. whether that understanding, on the part of our
guest. extended to the ways in which we planned to use him.
My Novosti boss was pleased that Mohan Kumaramangnlam
would indeed write a book on the "achievements of the USSR Asian
republics undersocialism." My KGB contact, Fdnarrl Sid prov, con-
tinued to brief mc.
The next morning I reported to Novosli's accounting office, tothe
person of a very solid lady. armed with a cash register and bunkered
within walls of fat ledger books. I carried, triumphantly. a piece of'
paper bearing the following remarks (which I had typed myself):

TO THE DIRECTORATE OF NOVOSTI PRESS

AGENCY FROM THE DEPARTMENT OF SOUTH
EAST ASIA
A member of Me directorial board of Air India. Mr.
Kumaramanealam. has just completed his stay in Mns-
cow by the invitation of the Chamber of Commerce of the
USSR. A progressive political and social personality of
ltdia. Mr. Kumaramangalam expressed his willingness
to write a series of articles on Soviet-Indian technical
cooperation. and. alter completion of his talks with the
Soviet trade experts. to make at trip m Soviet Centre:
Asia for the purpose of writing a book on lheecnnnmkal
development of our Asian republics under Soviet power.
The department of' South East Asia oIIAPN considers
it useful for our work in India to arrange such a trip for
period of' two weeks. visiting: Sochi. Tbilisi. Ashkaha~
bad. Tashkent. Samarkand and Moscow.
We request your sanction to finance the trip by the
"deluxe" class for the guest. and "tourist" class for the
 78
guide-interpreter. comrade y. Bczmenov. an edin of
our department.
Also we requcsl to pay the royalties from our fermi for
the articles, written by Mr. Kumaramangalam for APP,
to be redirected exclusively for Indian newspapers
Senior cdilor v. Mak holier
Chief Ediwr V. Pushkov

II was further embroidered with the signatures and comments of

sundry Novosti bosses: "recommended." "approvcd.""please pay."
etc. I signed in the appropriate book, adding Mr. Kumararrnmga-
lam's name in dcvanagari characters for authenticity, the lady studied
the book away impatiently. and handed me a heavy envelope, into
which she had already inserted our gucsl's "royalty." with the same
magic paper I ran to the third floor to arrange with the financial
director such requisites as coupons for taxis. air tickets and hotel
bookings. some two hours' work. Then back to my section to deliver
the envelope to my immediate boss, comrade Makholin. End ofslage
one.
Stage two began two hours later in the VIP lounge of one of the
best restaurants in M oseow. the Aragvi. with its Georgia n-Caucasian
food. Comrade Mokhorin, who spoke English fluently. did the
talking. while l enjoyed the chicken "Tabafra "with a dry Georgian
wine. Part way through the meal. comrade Ma khotin casually pro-
duced the envelope. and joked. "petty cash for the road. "The guest
pocketed the envelope. and continued to discuss details of the trip
without any increase in enthusiasm. diplornatieally avoiding promi-
scs about the contents of his book. I drank, and meditated. how
wonderful it would be if all the "progressive" whores visiting my
country could behave as non-obligingly. The cat-8nd~mousc game
ended with a diplomatic formula. that the contents of Mr. Kurnara-
Manga1am's book would depend On many things; comrade Maklto-
tin gave me the cheerful glance ofa KGB inlerrozatorand concluded
that. indeed. a lot would depend on tMdiligence of the gu ide-transla-
lor.
I was ready. willingand able to do anything to prevent the publica-
tion of a book of sweet lies about my country under the name of so
pleasant and clever an Indian. and toasted my boss's remark.
Mr. Kumaramangalam enioved his visit to the historical monu-
ments of Samarkand and Bukhara, Ashkabad and Tbilisi: we
avoided most of the "dczhunri "(clkhc) arltructioru. such as "typical
and average" collective farms and kindergarten, through the judi-
cious scheduling of Mr. Kumaramangalarne headaches and those of
his wife. Comrade Makhotin was happy. for ourgucst continued to
promise to write his book. 1 was delighted to spend two weeks away
 79
from Novosu. Only comrade Sidorov was unhappy. with the follow
ing report from mc:
1. Influence M Kumammangaiam on the military in
India. according lo him, is negligible. Relations with
brother. General Kumaramangala m. cordial. but infly .
once - unspecified.
2. Purchase of Soviet-made jct-liners by Air India.
according 10 guest, depends only slightly on his personal
decision. Last word will be after the technical experts,
board ufdireetors and Indian mass media have had their
say. lt was recommended to arrange free exhibition tours
of "I1'.l'ushilt "and "Tupolev" planes in India for selected
groups ufjuuirialists and public figures. During trip with-
ill Soviet Union the performance of some Soviet planes
on domestic airlines were far from satisfactory. aaeoniing
to guest.
3. Personal slur tuuurings and weaknesses of the guest
are negligible. He is happily mauled and moderate with
alcohol. His Iinaricial status is too secure 10 make him
interested in APN royalties air early received. Discussing
the possible publiuuliun ufliia book on USSR. fivewligits
sums of money were mentioned. Desire to become
famous writer - negligible.
The KGB did not leave Mr. Kumaramangalam alone. despite the
pessimism of my report. The cuuuship continued in New Delhi.
when l arrived there in 1969. The Soviet made mission organized a
"show flight." with plenty w drink, but it did not help: in one of the
major Indian newspapers there appealed a businesslike report.
comparing the technical day ul' the llyusiliu, the American-made
Boeing and British-made VC-l0- ll appeared that the Soviet aircraft
consumed much more fuel. used longer runways. otealctl muse
exhaust pollution, made more noise and was nut. as well suuud-
insutated as its competitors. In addition. in slap-landed. "The Soviet
planes may be perfect as bombers. but surely they are lousy as
passenger planes." the report concluded.
The Soviet trade mission was futivus; but Ait lndiastill ditlll°l. buy
Soviet planes. I was secretly pleased that Indian "democracy" had
worked. and that the path w socialism lheie had inn made just a
little longer.
As for Mr. Rumaramangalam. he cunt irtucd to be harassed by the
KGB and Novosii until he died in a mysteriol.ls plane crash some
seven years later.
 an

Two famous Indians who were targeted by the APN-KGB

for ideological "analysis": Mohan Kumarammgalam (ahnw),
and Maharishi Mahesh Yogi (below).

8.*3?asnss!'3'=é>Tll-1
855\4398

k-5

re:

141;
weuvzns. •

81

IN THE NAME OF PEACE

Av. about 4 p.m.. when I had almost Ilnisned my daily marathon
around the corridors of Novosti. and is meditating over a pile of'
"closed" TASS dispatches. news meant only for trusted eyes. my
tclcplturre lang demandingly.
II was comrade Sidorov. He informed me, in his usual syrup-and-
puison voice, the: he wanted to meet me at about live. somewhere
between Pushkin Square and petrovka. As approached the place of
rendezvous. Eduard Ivanovitch inquired about the slate of my health
and disposition. and whether | was tired by my daily routine.
Defense Minister Swaran Singh of India was coming to Moscow
with a large entourage of military experts. both in uniform and out.
Comrade Sidorov wanted me to accompany the delegation as a
"reponcr" for novosti. Comrade Stdorov could not hope that I
would be assigned to the job by Novostr, and I did not want to ask
him who would be behind me. Io let him have it all his way was strict-
ly against my principles.
I personified modesty:
"For God's sake, Eduard Ivanovich'"l said, trying to look loyal.
dedicated. humble and honest, "there are many more deserving
colleagues in our ollie, who would be biter Rtted for such an
honorable job. l just do not have the experience.or. for that matter,
the Party Sta ndrng of' my colleagues ..
°'Ttlisjob. Y url A Iexand rovich, requires not so much experience or
Forty standing." answered the sleuth sincerely. "as a good musical
ear and a thorough knowledge of colloquial Indian la ngauges. You
see, all we want from you during this trip, is to be present during all
official and other meetings between the Indians and our boys. and
pay utmost attention to whatever they say about our defense techno-
logy. 'I my to Iigure out who is a real expert and who is just a bureau-
eral. I hope with your military vocabulary. taught to you in the Insti-
tute of Oriental Languages. it will not be difficult. Have you still
retained some of it?"
°°on. what are you saying. Eduard lvanovitch! How could I pos-
sibly forget such an interesting subject!"
Comrade Sidotov pierced me with his constli¢tor's eyes; but
decided not to notice my sarcasm.
"Anything curious. whatever you notice about the members of the
delegation. their political and ideological views. their attitude toward
our country. their personal qualities, anything that may give our
Committee a more complete picture of the visit and of the composi-
tion of' the group."
"oh yes. the last request." said staorov crisply. "There will be a
young second secretary of the Indian embassy. someone you know,
 sz
probably from unofficial cocktail parties. He is only twenty-live
years old. but rather a promising figure in the embassy. Try in he
friendly to him and ive a closer look, OK?"
'°Surc. no problem." I said. and Eduard lvanovitch none again
pierced me with his sharp little eyes aM nose. nodrlerl and disap-
peared in the Moscow crowd.
I have never seen what it looks like when arms are sold. I have seen
only the results of those transactions - in photographs of the Vict-
nam war in foreign and Soviet magazines Also, when I read about
"selfless and consistent support lo national-liberationist movements
all over the world." I knew this actually meant supplying AK-47: to
all sorts of bloodthirsty "progressives" desperately bent on power.
By elevent o`clock in the morning. a train of black limousines slow- 8

ly and silently rolled up to the grey monster of the USSR defense

ministry in Arbatski Square. The Indian guests walked in a long file,
deco rding to seniority. through a heavy oak and bronzedoor, spread
open in welcome. Scrgeonts of the guard stood at attention. with the
emotionless eyes of' cannibals.
The delega t ion slowly walked to the second floor. along the widest
imaginable staircase. laid with the inevitable red carbet. leading
dineotly into a giant conference hall. Along the endless eonferenoe
table. with its red cover. there were heavy chairs, and before each.
symmetrically displayed pads of paper Ami pencils. Mineral water
and glasses were also provided.
The visiting tribe displayed itself for photographers. In half it
minute, the opposite door to the hah opened slowly. and in walked a
group of our chieftains. led by Marshal Crcchko. all oflhcm decora- 1
ted with the bones of eaten enemies and dried skulls of comrade
Lenin on their chats. The Soviet minister-soldier approached the
3
Indian minister bureaucrat. and I saw a tiny stream of urine pouring
onto the parqueted Door under the guest. whodnnccd eonvubivcly in
Nehru's pajamas. The Soviet minister bumped into the guest.
grabbed his ready hand and showed his teeth to him and to the
photographers. There followed it she. The guess and the hosts
J

lined up for the "press" and again showed their teeth, the Soviets
beaming, the guests more modest. The next morning there would be
a large picture in Prawn. and a chance for Western krt-.mlinologists
to spcculstc.
In a minute all of the war-makes seukd at the table, and started
pronouncing words without meaning, words of which the meaning
had been changed. and words that had been purposefully twisted.
"Slatunchly abiding by the principles of proletarian international-
ism ... consistently following the course of the Communist Party of
the USSR towards peaceful coexistence ... being in the advance-
 83
guard of the fn res of peace and progress ... fulfilling our duty to all
progressive mankind ... victorious Soviet people ... hand of friend-
ship ... perplex of Asia, Africa and Latin America ... brotherly
cooperation between the Republic of India and the USSR ..."
The Indian war minister replied:
"Following the path of independent development ... in the interest
of preserving the sovereignty and territorial integrity ... considering
certain aggressive tendencies ... for the sake of peace and progress ..
non-al infment with military bloen ..."
In my inner ear I heard'
Soviet-savage: We are strongest. all fear us, we help all who fear us
and who help us to keep the rest of' the tribes in fear. You better buy
ml' poisoned arrows, or we will beat the shit out of you.
Indian savage- Yes. you are strong. but we do not want to be obliged
to you. We want to buy the poisoned arrows witcrevcr we want.
Moreover, if it were not for our unfriendly next-door lleigllbor we
would not need any arrows at all. But thank you anyway. and phase.
don't hurt us!
Grechko could then showhis teeth. growl and bite his Indian coun-
tefpa rt on the leg. Swann Singh would then give a friendly barland
walk alongside with his tail between him kg.
The bargaining lasted ninety minutes.
The meaning of comrade Sidorovls assignment became clear to me
in Sevastopol. where the lnctitm ddcptioll was brought lu inspect a
number of military vessels, offered for sale. There were torpedo
boats. cruisers, submarines and rocket-launching bouts. all freshly
painted and shined for the guests.
During the inspection tour some members of the delegation were
obviously impressed. They would touch the iron uiurl$t¢rs with
respect. pat the round bodies of' the rockets and fill llumcwlls nome-
books with the figures on how many could be kiilcd with Mis or that
rocket. It seemed that me statistics quoted by the Soviet salesmen
were satisfactory. Several limes I overheard Indians quietly saying lo
each other, in Hindustani. words like "below stamlaud,""junk"and
"uncomfortable."Thoae officers. Igatbered,wamed lu guarantee the
territorial integrity of India In more comfortable boats. capable of
using interchangeable pans, purehnwd in other couuu i's. Evidently.
the "progressiveness" and patriotism of those oliicen had not ye!
reached the level where one understands that such l.rilllcs as sailors`
comfort (they will die anyway, wont they?) has nut fin; to do with
the historiently-inevitable national--iborntion-mowment-xowattls-
the-bright-futurt-of-anll-mankind.
During an impressive banquet on board a shiny cruiser. I was
sealed between the Indian and Soviet officers and acted as u transla-
n>r. allowing officials to grab a bite and n gulp of wine between were-
 84
moral telnarks. In an hour of two, hnth sides were less formal and
the Indian side was more sympathetic In the idea of buying Soviet-
made weaponry. I aslted a Soviet Mfieer ne or to me if it were true that
some of the boats offered m India were no longer prod uced or eer-
vioed in the USSR and had hero discarded by the Soviet Navy.
Chewing a piece of steamed hnfuga, the officer au e ntively looked al
me. noticed the Novosti badge on myehest pocket. and portable tape
recorder hanging from my shoulder, then reached for a boule of'
vodka. poured in into as ma no glasses as he could each, tilted his
glass and pronounced a Mass "To peace All over the world! To our
advanced defense equipment!"
Whn would refuse the drink?

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 BE

DAWNIN OF DETENTE
Comrade Sidorov wanted me to meetas many Indian diplomats as
possible during the next week. and to take a son of "opinion poll"on
the question: "How would the Indian government react. if the Soviet
government actively interfered in Czechoslovakia tossup anti-Soviet
and anti-socialist elements'activity?" I knew from the TASS reports.
and from foreign radio broadcasts. that Soviet troops had with-
drawn from Czechoslovakia after rather prolonged "military defen-
sive maneuvers" by the West German border. which had been held
under the pretext that NATO troops were having their own war
games at that Lim. But NATO troops were lone zone, the CZech:
were more or less content.and we. in Novosti. were under the impres-
sion that Du book would getaway with his liberal reforms . What kind
of 'active interilenence°' might comrade Sidorov mean? Invasion?
Impossible! Purges under KGB supervision? Too old fashioned,
highly improbable, Then what? ...
"We-ll." I said to myself, "what possible harm could l cause to
Czechoslovakia or India by asking my Indian friends a couple of
political questiotts"" So I did. None of them even suggested that
India might protest or condemn Soviet "active imertereiwe even
when I took it upon myself to suggest what this might mean.
Comrade Sidorov seemed to be satisfied with my report on Indian
diplomatic reaction. And I comfortably forgot the matter . _ .
On August 20 I received a call from a fellow whose name I could
hardly recollect. We met at Delhi University in 1964. He had inim-
duced himself as Igor Ivanov, a student from Moscow, who had
arrived in India on a "cultural exchange." Igor was a tall. blue-eyed
and blond-haired Aryan ubermenclz with slrongjawsand an athletic
body. He cracked stupid jokes in broken l-lindianrt addressed a Sikh
taxi driver disl'¢spcctluIIy is "loom " and "swrdah " As terr as I
remembered. Igor spent most of his time at students' parties. where
young radicals discussed politics. For entertainment Igor collected
pornographic magazines. sokl in Connaught Plane on the sidewalks.
Thalls about all 1 could remember of Igor Ivanov (probably not his
real name) on my way to meet him at "Friendship Housel°in Kali
nikki Prospect. I do not remember exactly what was the occasion of
the meeting that day? probably the signing of some new Soviet-
Indian friendship and cooperation protocoL or the cekbralion of an
anniversary of an old one.
I met Igor after the oiTicial part of the evening in the basement
cafeteria-cum-bar. and he introduced me to a group of African and
Asian students from the University of Lumllmha. We talked about
nothing Tor an while. the Africans bored to death and showing in.. The
Indians were more polite. In abut half an hour Igor came up to me
 as
and whispered that he and the Africans were leaving for a private
party at snmenne's apartment. and that I was invited. That was fine
with me. and we left quietly.
The party appeared to he a gathering of students from Lumumha
University cetehrating grad nation from a preparatory course. There
were some Latin Americans mo. The girls were mainly Russian:
they were bravely dressed "decadent ILS. style." They inlroditced
themselves as students, bm I immediately rrrngnired them as
lasrochki. The music was loud and decadently Western I could hard-
ly hear Igor as he introduced me to a group of studentsfrom Somatic
or Mozambique, all studying "political economy and philosophy."
The philosophers were rather unsociable. They were too occupied
with watching girls. chewing gum and shaking their muscular bodies
in the rhythm of the music. When they danced. they did it well. Their
"body language"spoke of the awakening spirit of Africa . Compared
to the boys. our Russian girls looked like cows on a skating rink. but
clad in foreign stretch skirts and blue jeans.
By len o'clock most of the guests and hosts were solidly intoxica-
ted. and l noticed that. one after another. mixed couples disa plea red
into another room or, if that was occupied. into the bathroom. They
emerged slightly ruffled by proletarian internationalism. Following
the example of my African brothers. I tried to woo one of the girls
into the kitchen. but after a nohcomtnittal kiss and a superficial study
of each 0l.her's anatomy. the lasrochka pushed me away with un-
cxpectedly strong arms, whispering impatiently, " Not here, another
time"' and gave me her telephone number (which I was sur4a was a
False one).
At about one in the morning the guests started lcavi fig. The music
was turned lower. as were the lights in the guest room. The dancing
rhythm bceamc slow and intimate. I mixed myself a vodka with
lemon and went around the apartment in search of Igor, who had
said he wanted to talk to mc. I found him on the balcony. molesting a
nice-looking young Communist front L tin America. I apologized
J

and began to leave them to international friendship. but Igorstoppcd

me. Ile let go of the girl, and she left quietly to the guest room in the
direction of the liquor table.
"Eduard Ivanovklt sends you his best rcgar-d8."said Igor by way of
a password." Ile is on vacation, in Sochi.*
1 offered to get Igor a glass of vodka. but he said that he did not
drink.
"Alcohol kills the bin cells. you know." he said. smiling. (And I
thought. why should that stop you?)
He Iiatencd to my account of adventures with foreign diplomats
rather indifferently. Neither was he impressed when I told him how
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Patvico Lumumba, Communist puppet M the Congo, travels flum bar lo bar in Leopoldville drumming up sugaolt.
 as
successfully I had spread the KGB rumor that the Soviet premier
minister was planning lo send an invitation tothe ptcsitlcnt of the US
to visit Mnsrnw the following month. The traditional "reliable sour-
ces' formula. in combination with my APN background and some
mal contacts within the Foreign Affairs Ministry. worked perfectly
well ...
"That's all very well, Yuri Alexnndrovieh,'° he said. "but now. if
you want, you may go a step further and do work of a slightlydif~
fervent charm.-ter for State Security. We have been watching your
Work with the foreigners. and we think that yuucould do with a more
intellectually stimulating job. "
"l am not sure about a 'step furthel."... You see. Igor. the Corn-
mittee may probably be narc that I ..
Your mischievous dtaraetcr is well known. but that would not
matter. Now, after several years of work with foreigners, both 3.1
home and abroad. you probably have nuliccd Mal many of them are
rather weak people. lacking what we call an'idcological backbone .' "
"Something of the sort came to my mind. true. But I assume there
are mom dignified people abroad. maybe even some 1alemed and
strong enemies?"
*Tate rod enemies arc the eoneeua of adlflerent department of the
KGB: we shall stick to weak friends first. Me foreign friends. who
need our help and moral Suppol l. "
"All right." I said. I had an itumession that Igor was enjoying his
role as a lecturer. so I lei him talk.
"You probably have diseowcwd already that our Soviet man. wi lh
all his shortcomings. is as being of a higher order than they. Even our
Soviet hooligan and alcoholic (here Igor stuck his linger in my chest,
to offer an example) is basically an honest and free man. enjoying
freedom of a true kind. aequiied by sclemgflc cognition of realig/.
We. the Soviet people. are able to sacrifice our personal interests for
the 'interests of our society, our present for our bright future. They
(Igor nude a vague gesture towards the dancing l`oreigners)cannot ."
'Genenuizntions of this for t are beyond my competence.. -"
"Read the newspapers! The Americans in Vietnam, a hurry
literally possessed and screwed up by them. cannot right the war
without beer and women! And drugs. They are pawns, expendable
pawns, gun lOddcr ..."
"Well ... so what?" (1 still wondered what the hell the KGB
wanted from me now.)
"So this: we are n hcllcrand Slr Unger son ofpeoplc. You personal-
ly. for example, with all your weaknesses. I would preterabove most
so-called 'friends'oT our eounu y, many of whom you have to Accor -
party as a translator-cum-servant."
"So?"
 89
"Say. in we invited some Jean- Paul Same lo a conference of
progressive Writers, he would arrive with his none nmning from
dellgltt. and write and declare publicly anything we would ask him -
abou: our achievements. But try the same trick with you: would you
give an interview to the 'Voice of' America "2"
"Of course not." I said. (Cheap provocateur)
"You sec!" exclaimed Igor. as if he had proven a very important
point.
"A `stcp further.` " I said gloomily.
"Yes A step t`urther. Yuri Alexandrovich. if;/ou decide to make it.
would mean that you11 have not only to observe the foreign guests
and report to us. but also to playasomcwhat more active role in their
reorientation process. usingtheir weakncssesand personal peculiari-
ties. to is ditlirult work. if you want, to that of a psychologist. or a
teacher with mentally retarded children."
"I sec." I said I pensively. not understanding why we needed men-
tally retarded friends
"You see, we do not allow renegades and anti-Soviet elements to
undermine our social order by voicing the socliet! `rights' ofcrimi-
mls, pederast and traitors. But in the West their presidents woo
every debit, shake hands with both hippies and progressive writers.
neo-tascists and Communists. Therefore, we also cannot afford to
ignore any foreigner. as Iongas he is able and willing to be a carrier of
our id as s."
"My impression is." said I. "that a number ofrmher progressively-
thinking foreigners would prefer their names not to be associated
with us. Novosti Press Agency in particular."
"Oh, that will ehangefsaid Igor with force. "that is already chan-
ging. In the time of'cuk` our committee used old-fashioned methods
based on the presumption that 'nothing humane is strange to Our
trends and adverser mies': everybody likes a lithe bit of extra cash. a
good meal. a company of a young girl. maybe ... a reputation as n
well-known humanist. And if that did not work we used tO havc.am1
still have. and still have, wonderful files on each of them. and we
would not hesitate to pass it on to their sensational mass media."
"Is it any different now?"
"Well. in a way, yes. You may get it at your Novosti briefing soon
-- the new policy line."
"Relaxation of international tensions" Rapptochemem?"
"Not only that. The latest key-word is wlewme. ' '°
new

"Bi8. big men will glance to our music. Youll so. men like Willy
Brandt. Nixon. Ed Kennedy, Pompidou, that Canadian pidnr
lmdeau ... to say nothing about small shit like liberal university
professors, media people, actors. lawyers, businessmen. and of
 90
course, students,"
"lgor."said I. pretending to be mon drunk than I was.°ldon\you
think it stinks?"
"The ethical side of the work. Yuri Aicxandrovich. may give you
some trouble and often bring up the quest ion 'lo he or not lo be'
with our Committee. Remember though. that any respectable world
power. and we are. must have its intelligence service, and in any poli-
tical system these services use methods which are. mildly speaking.
less thats kosher. "
"Could you be more specific about my work. please."
°'Yes. We want you. (or the start. to screen the young rlicnzozlnip-
ye. including the Lumumba lot. and using your Novosti cover and
your discretion. select those who are fit for further training in our
centers For leaders of the national liberation forces."
"Why mc? Donlt you have enough of your men within Lumumba
already?"
"We want your opinion on them from a specific angle. As a
journalist and propaganda specialist we want you to assess their
ability to be ideologically effective."
'°Wcll. most of them were sounded ideologically, as! understand.
before entering Lumumba. Would you like me to select further the
most dedicated matrxisls'?"
°'No..lust the opposite. We need people who can innocently say
white is black and make others believe in. We do not need 'true belie-
yers* they turn into the worst enemies it' and when disillusioned. We
want ideological workers. motiwttod by simple. permanent and
reliable instincts: the desire for power and the abilitY tosurviws. Plus
an ability to use ideological propaganda techniques. the wav you do
within Novosti. This is one of the most important factors of our
future work in the developing, world. according lO the latest usranov-
ka of the Central Committee."
"Yes. see,"l said. noticing that my glass was empty. "I will think it
over and let you know soon."
"Very well. Yuri Alexandrovich. Please call Sidorov when you are
ready, OK?"
iv. was getting cold on the balcony. so l said good~byc to Igor and
walked into the guest room. where the future liberators of the Third
World were dancing cheek-to-cheek with KGB girls to blues for the
USA. The room smelled of sweat, smoke. alcohol. and proletarian
solidarity. l poured myself a stiff vodka and tossed it down my
throat, chasing it with a bite of pickle, Nobody paid any attention to
me as I slipped out of' the apartment nd walked into sleeping
4
I

Moscow. Sleep well. dear Moscow. Mc and Igor are vigilantly

guarding your security against imperialists.
91
 sz
The next morning I heard on the shorhwove about the Soviet
invasion into Czechoslovakia. The tearful voice of a Prague radio
girl implored the indifferent world: "This is Radio Prague. Brotherly
radio stations in Yugoslavia, Romania, Hungary! Phase tell the
world about our tragedy. Please help us to reach people in brotherly
socialist countries ... This is our last broadcast ... Tlx: Soviet tanks
open fine at the windows of our radio station ... Long live Dubcek !
Long live socialism! Long live Czechoslovakia!"
Four days later. n Novosti eolkogue intmduucd mc no his girl-
friend Gelya. just returned from Prague on a Soviet personnel
carrier. She was shaking. weeping. describing the might of the inva-
sion. And the shame she felt, as a teaehet of Russian in Prague
University. when her students walked out of hen class on the mouing
after the invasion.
He pless rage overtook mc. Whtltcan a small man like myselfdo to
stop this madness? Bum myself in protest in the Red Square? Blow
up the Kremlin? Hopeless. This world. as my Indian friend would
say. is going or-ogrmively mad . ..
By the end of the day a deebion erysulircdz l shall take the new
KGB job. I shall remember every blaelassed son-of-a-bitch per-
sonally. 111 to be their pictures, if possible. and aherdcleetion to the
West. I shall tell the world who are the cadres of the "black majority"
a nd "liberators of' peoples"! And what these whores weredoingin My
country. apart front screwing the KGB Iaswchki.

To be continued...
§d
q
.
1
4.
..

To be continued...

8
All warfare is based primarily on the deception ohm enemy. Fighting
on a battlefield is the most primitive way of making war. There is no
aft higher bar to destroy your enemy without a fight - by SUB-
VERTING anything of value the enemvls country.
s

Sun Tzu
(Shines: phiklsopher
500 B.C.

we rarely use guns to kill people and take their country. The cleanest
way is to blackmail, pervert, bribe, lie and intimidate the POLITI-
CIANS and Me MEDIA, and they will destabilize and disunity their
own country for us. Then all we have left to do is to arm the pro-
communist or simply criminal factions and we have a coup and
another "liberated" country. As neat as thai.
Yuri llezmenov
lonna agent of APN-KGB

What war rages between 1945 and ... now? Ah, only a thin! of man-
kind was conquered! No war al all. Just peaceful liberation.
Lev Nauvrozov
Soviet dissident writer

Psychological warfare. a form of'covert' action which hunk; down

the opposite side's home defenses without a shut being find, is waged
by Soviet Communism throughout the communication media of
other countries.
John Re's
Accuracy in Media. Washington
Whether a loumarisi, politician or a businessman is in fact on a vui-
roll of the KGB or our, whether he helps lo spread Communism
willingly, by ignorance or low a profit, whether he is caught and
punished or at large and happy - is absolutely immaterial for the
cause ol'sU BV EHSIUN . what matters is the final vector of History,
the sum of our individual actions. decisions, statements, our com-
promise niih our consciousness. This is where every one of us is
accountable to the future and God.
Alex Kosachov
It usslan emigrate poet
 ' u.. ._.

.
\

8&8?'i3i?§8°1'i'
CATIONS ~"'!.

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shameful "deals" between the Soviet KGB and some
western journalists, spreading Communist disinformaf
dion in their own countries. Photos and documents
included. 64 pages, $5.69 postpaid.

In my next book "Moscow - Delhi - Void"

I will describe the workings of the Soviet
embassy's information Department in India,
orchestration of :he invasion into East Pakistan
in 1970 (described by the Wester media as
"grass row Islamic Revolu¢ion") and. jinalfy, my
defection from the USSR embassy Io Americans,
disguised as a "hippie". Price of the book _
$7.95 postpaid send your checkes to NA TA,
501 So..FI¢rirfax Av., Room 218, Los Angeles,
California 90036.
 ISBN ma5090-17-7
Answering your leans
'Copyright by Tomas Schuman

*°°l'l¢.,o
After grnluating, he worked for No-
vocti, then spent two years in India
as an interpreter am! public relarlons
dliccr with Soviet Refincriea Const-
ructionx He returned to Moscow in
1965 lo work for Novosn, serving as
Economic Editor for the Hindi, Urdu
8 to and English Editions of' Sovielland
Magazine. In i969 he weN! back to
India and tontinried '°g=v"<'° efforts
for Novodi in New Bel i, working out
of the Soviet Embassy it a tlqmtment
wllcd Research and Counter-Propaganv
do. Duo to his growing disgust, Ire be-
" " -4 l" '
gan to plan defection.

8
2".

.41 4 .-, In February of 1970 he disguised

»-SI'9. -_.< 4 Nimself as a hippie complete with beads
an
_ and wi; md joined a tour group to
map: to Mum. la contacted the
TOMAS SCHUMAN has bun penan- Units Status Embassy aid. after 2
ally involved with the world-wide pro- 'my debriefing by U.S. Iniclligence.
pagnnda efforts of the Sofviel n'jane. was granted asylum std went to Cana-
Like a true-life Winston Smith, from da.
George 0lwelI's '°19s4". Tomas In Canada. he studied political science
Schuman worked for fin the communist at the University of Toronto for Iwo
equivalent of 0rwelI's Mklisiry of Truth years, taught Russian language and
»The Nrwnsti Pres Agency. Novosli. literature and ill 1972 was hired by the
which means "News" in Russian, Canadian Broadcasting Corporation's
exists to produce slanted and false lnternalional Service as a Producer!
slams to plant in the foreign neila. Announcer, broadcasting to lhc Soviet
The Kim for this K.G.0. effort is Union. Thr: K.G.B. forced him out of
"disinfo¢mali°n". the job in 1976, so re began l'leeJance
Mr. Schuman was bom under the juumalisrn and worked un a variety of
name of Yuri Bezasenov in Moscow in projects.
1939. the Sim of a senior officer in the Today Ile is a political analyst for
u p A r m y . Consequently. he went to PANORAMA weekly in Los Angeles..
good schools. Al la: age of 17 lu: He is ruarried, and has Iwo children.
enters the 'Institute of Oriental lang- Ile is the author of two yet unpub-
ttages of Moscow State University. iilted hooks.

you can ofdur Mis buds by mailing your snack made to N.A.T.A. (Now
American Talent Aasoddien) 70 pages, 57.80 postpaid. - to'
Alfnancc, 501 So!-laia'fa:l As., Saito 206. Los Angevin. Ca mass. Tape-
eassou- with Schuman's talk on KGB 's Active measures are availablefof
SO n place plus postage.
ALMANAC
Los Angeles, 19 ,L»