Cbapter I I Paragraph Structure n

Paragraph 3

For example, the Eskimos, living in a treeless region of snow and ice, sometimes
build temporary homes out of thick blocks of ice. People who live in deserts, on
the other hand, use the most available materials, mud or clay, which provide good
insulation from the heat. In Northern Europe, Russia, and other areas of the world
where forests are plentiful, people usually construct their homes out of wood. In
the islands of the South Pacific, where there is an abundant supply of bamboo
and palm, people use these tough, fibrous plants to build their homes.

B. On a piece of paper, write two or three topic sentences for each of the following
topics. In other words, give two or three controlling ideas for the same topic.

Example
Topic: cell phones
Topic sentences: 1. Using a cell phone while driving can be dangerous.
2. There are certain rules of cell phone manners that
everyone should know.
3. Cell phones have changed the way we communicate.

Topics
Movies Your home town
Word processors Advertising

c. With your classmates, choose three topics that interest you as a group. Write
a topic sentence for each topic. Be sure to include a controlling idea.

Supporting Sentences
Supporting sentences explain or prove the topic sentence. One of the biggest problems
in student writing is that student writers often fail to support their ideas adequately.
They need to use specific details to be thorough and convincing.
There are several kinds of specific supporting details: examples, statistics, and
quotations.

Step 1 Read Paragraphs A and B about red-light running. Notice the different
specific supporting details that have been added to Paragraph B.
Supporting Step 2 Locate the topic sentence in Paragraph B. Circle the topic and
Sentences underline the controlling idea.
Step 3 Which supporting sentences in Paragraph B contain the kinds of
details listed below? Give the sentence numbers of each kind.
An example: _
A statistic: _
A quotation: _
12 P.n"t 1 I Writing a Paragraph

Paragraph A: Paragraph without Support

Red-Light Running
Although some people think that red-light running is a minor traffic violation
that is no worse than jaywalking, I it can, in fact, become a deadly crime. Red-light
runners cause accidents all the time. Sometimes people are seriously injured and
even killed. It is especially a problem in rush hour traffic. Everyone is in a hurry
to get home, so drivers run red lights everywhere. The police do not do much
about it because they are too busy. The only time they pay attention is when
there is an accident, and then it is too late. In conclusion, running a red light is
a serious offense.

Paragraph B: Paragraph with Support

Red-Light Running
"!Although some people think red-light running is a minor traffic violation that is
no worse than jaywalking, it can, in fact, become a deadly crime. iied-Iight runners
cause hundreds of accidents, including deaths and injuries as well as millions of
dollars in damages. tach year more than 900 people die, and nearly 200,000 are
injured in crashes that involve red-light running. 4fv1otorists run red lights all the time.
!for example, in Fairfax, Virginia, a five-month-Iong survey at five busy intersections
revealed that a motorist ran a red light every 20 minutes. ERed-light runners
are seldom caught. 7According to the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety,
"Communities don't have the resources to allow police to patrol intersections as
often as would be needed to ticket all motorists who run red lights" ("Q&A").2

The next section shows you how to use examples as support. Other types of
support-facts, statistics, and quotations-are explained in Chapter 3.

Examples Examples are perhaps the easiest kind of supporting detail to use because you can
often take examples from your own knowledge and experience. You don't have to
search the library or the Internet for supporting material. Furthermore, examples
make your writing lively and interesting, and your reader is more likely to remem-
ber your point if you support it with a memorable example.
Words and phrases that introduce examples include for example,for instance, and
such as. See Transition Signals on pages 25-29 in Chapter 2 for more information.

Ijaywalking: crossing a street where there is no marked area for it

2"Q&A: Red Light Running." Insurance Institute for Highway Safety June 2003. 26 Feb. 2004
<http://www.hwysafety.org/safetyjacts/qanda/rlc.htm>.
 Cbapter 11 I Paragraph Structure 13

MODEE Language and Perception

Paragraph II possess the same physical organs for sensing the w
Supported with earing,noses for smelling, skin for feeling, and
Examp'es n of the world depends to a great extent on the
rding to a famous hypothesis3 proposed by lingu .
Edward enjamin Lee Whorf. They hypothesized that language is like
a pair of eyeglasses through which we "see" the world in a particular way. A
classic example of the relationship between language and perception is the word
snow. Eskimo languages have as many as 32 different words for snow. For
instance, the Eskimos have different words for falling snow, snow on the ground,
snow packed as hard as ice, slushy snow, wind-driven snow, and what we might
call "cornmeal" snow. The ancient Aztec languages of Mexico, in contrast, used
only one word to mean snow, cold, and ice. Thus, if the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis
is correct and we can perceive only things that we have words for, the Aztecs
perceived snow, cold, and ice as one and the same phenomenon. 4

Writing Technique Questions

1. What is the main idea of this paragraph? Underline the part of the topic
sentence that expresses the main idea.
2. What examples does the writer use to support this idea? Put brackets [
around them.
3. What words and phrases introduce the examples? Circle them.

The Concluding Sentence

A concluding sentence serves two purposes:
1. It signals the end of the paragraph.
2. It leaves the reader with the most important ideas to remember. It can do
this in two ways:
• By summmizing the main points of the paragraph
OR
• By repeating the topic sentence in different words
A paragraph does not always need a concluding sentence. For single paragraphs,
especially long ones, a concluding sentence is helpful to the reader because it is
a reminder of the important points. However, a concluding sentence is not needed
for every paragraph in a multiparagraph essay.
You may want to begin your concluding sentence with one of the signals in the
list on page 14. You may also end a paragraph without a formal signal or perhaps by
using an expression like those in the column on the right.

3hypothesis: theory that has not been proven

4 p henomenon: thing or event (plural: phenomena)
14 Part 1 I Writing a Paragraph

End-of-Paragraph Signals End-of-Paragraph Signals

Followed by a Comma Not Followed by a Comma
Finally, Lastly, The evidence suggests that .
In brief, Therefore, There can be no doubt that .
In conclusion, Thus, These examples show that .
Indeed, To sum up, We can see that ...
In short,

Notes
1. Many writing teachers think In conclusion and In summary are overused
and so will not want you to use them.
2. Do not use the phrase At last as an end-of-paragraph signal. At last means
"at the end of a long period of time," as in this sentence: At last, you've
come home.

The models that follow demonstrate the two ways of writing a concluding sen-
tence. As you read them, determine which concluding sentence summarizes the
main points and which concluding sentence repeats the topic sentence in different
words.

MODELS Greeting Cards

Concluding Have you noticed how many different kinds of greeting cards au can
Sentences buy these days? In the old days, the local drugstore had one rack display'
maybe five or six basic kinds of cards. You could walk into the store and
choose an appropriate card in five minutes or less. Nowadays, however, t e
display space for greeting cards is as big as a soccer field, and it may take
an hour or two to hunt down exactly the right card with exactly the right
message. There are at least 30 categories of birthday cards alone: birthday
cards for different ages, from different ages, for different relatives, from
different relatives, for different genders, from different genders, from a
couple, from the office, for dog owners, for cat owners, and so on. There are
cards for getting ajob, for retiring from a job, for acquiring a pet, for losing a
pet, for becoming engaged, for breaking up. There are also greeting cards to
send for no reason-"Thinking of you" or "Just because" cards. The newest
type of card is the "encouragement card." An encouragement card offers
comforting thoughts and helpful advice to someone who is sad or distressed
in these troubled times. In short, there is now a greeting card for every
possible life event and for a few nonevents as well.
 Chapter 1 I Paragraph Structure 15

A Hawaiian Legend
Native people create legends to explain unusu henomena in their
environment. A end from the Hawaiian island uai explains how the
naupaka flower, lower tha s on beaches ; got its unusual shape. The
flower looks like alf a small . '-there are peta s on one side only. The legend
says that the marriage of two young lovers on the island was opposed by both
sets of parents. The parents found the couple together on a beach one day, and
to prevent them from being together, one of the families moved to the mountains,
separating the young couple forever. As a result, the naupaka flower separated
into two halves; one half moved to the mountains, and the other half stayed near
the beach. This story is a good example of a legend invented by native people
to interpret the world around them.

Writing Technique Questions

1. In which paragraph does the concluding sentence summarize the main points
of the paragraph, which are not specifically stated in the topic sentence?
2. In which paragraph does the concluding sentence paraphrase (repeat in
different words) the topic sentence?
3. Circle the conclusion signals in each paragraph.
Note: Never introduce a new idea in the concluding sentence.
INCORRECT In conclusion, we now have more variety of greeting cards to choose from,
but they are also becoming very expensive. (This is a new idea~)

INCORRECT In conclusion, there are many other legends like this one in Hawaii. (This is a
new idea.)

RRA.CTICE 5 Step 1 Underline the topic sentence in each paragraph.

Step 2 Add a good concluding sentence to each paragraph. You may either
Writing
paraphrase the topic sentence or summarize the main points.
Concluding
Sentences Step 3 Practice using end-of-paragraph signals by starting each concluding
sentence with one.

Paragraph 1
You can be a good conversationalist by being a good listener. When you are
conversing with someone, pay close attention to the speaker's words while looking
at his or her face. Show your interest by smiling and nodding. Furthermore, do not
interrupt while someone is speaking; it is impolite to do so. If you have a good story,
wait until the speaker is finished. Also, watch your body language; it can affect your
communication whether you are the speaker or the listener. For instance, do not
sit slumped in a chair or make nervous hand and foot movements. Be relaxed and
bend your body slightly forward to show interest in the person and the conversation.
16 Part 1 I Writing a Paragraph

Paragraph 2
Modern communication technology is driving workers in the corporate world
crazy. They feel buried under the large number of messages they receive daily.
In addition to telephone calls, office workers receive dozens of e-mail and voice
mail messages daily. In one company, in fact, managers receive an average of
100 messages a day. Because they do not have enough time to respond to these
messages during office hours, it is common for them to do so in the evenings or
on weekends at home.

Review
These are the important points covered in this chapter:
1. A good topic sentence
• is a complete sentence with a subject, a verb, and a controlling idea.
• is neither too general nor too specific. It clearly states the main idea of
the paragraph but does not include specific details.
• is usually the first sentence in the paragraph.
2. Good supporting sentences
• explain or prove the topic sentence.
• are specific and factual.
• can be examples, statistics, or quotations.
3. A good concluding sentence
• signals the end of the paragraph.
• summarizes the important points briefly or restates the topic sentence
in different words.

Writing Practice
In the back of the book is an appendix outlining the steps in the writing process
(Appendix A, pages 265-279). Following the writing process steps will help you
write successfully. Your instructor may direct you to follow some or all of them.

I •• Choose one of the topics from Practice 3B or Practice 3C (page 11) and write a
paragraph eight to ten sentences in length.
Writing a
Paragraph Step 1 Begin with a topic sentence that you wrote in Practice 3. Write several
supporting sentences. Include at least one specific example. End with
a concluding sentence.
 Chapter 1 I Paragraph Structure 17

Step 2 After you have completed the first draft of your paragraph, use
Self-Editing Worksheet 1. It is on page 317 at the back of the book.
Answer the questions on it and write a second draft if necessary. Tear
the page out of the book and bling it with your paragraph to class.
Step 3 Exchange papers with a classmate and check each other's paragraph
using Peer-Editing Worksheet 1 on page 318. It is on the back side
of the Self-Editing Worksheet. After your classmate has completed the
checklist, discuss it with him or her and decide what changes you
should make.
Step 4 At home or in class (as your instructor directs), write a final copy of
your paragraph, making any improvements you discussed with your
peer editor.
Step 5 Hand in your first draft, your second draft, and the page containing the
two editing worksheets. Your instmctor may also ask you to hand in
any prewriting (brainstorming and/or outline) that you did for this
assignment.

These assignments give you practice in thinking and wliting quickly,-as you will
have to do for essay examinations. Your instmctor may choose to change the time
Writing under
Pressure limit or assign other topics depending on the needs and interests of the class.
Choose one of the suggested topics and write a well-organized paragraph. Your
instructor will give you a time limit. Try to use a specific example to support your topic
sentence.
• Spend 1 to 2 minutes at the beginning thinking of ideas and organizing
them.
• Spend 1 to 2 minutes at the end checking your work for errors.
• Spend the remaining time writing.

Topic Suggestions
Why some children have imaginary friends
The difficulty of translating from one language to another
The dependence of humans on machines
Pets
Jewelry
Any topic sentence from Practice 2 on page 9