Personal Development

Mental Health and Well-Being in Middle and ● A person with low self-esteem
Late Adolescence may exhibit types of behavior
that are self-destructive or
According to the US National Institutes of self-sabotaging.
Health, “mental health includes our emotional,
psychological, and social well-being. It affects ● On the other hand, a person with
how we think, feel, and act as we cope with life. healthy self-concept will move
It also helps determine how we handle stress, toward self-fulfillment and
relate to others, and make choices. Mental health self-actualization, have healthy
is important at every stage of life, from relationships, and live fulfilling
childhood and adolescence through adulthood.” lives.

The 1999 US Surgeon General’s Report on c. Autonomy - deals with one’s capacity
Mental Health defined mental health as the to separate one’s identity from other
“successful performance of mental function, significant persons like parents, lovers,
resulting in productive activities, fulfilling and special friends. Autonomy is the
relationships with other people, and the ability to capacity for self-direction and having a
change and to cope with adversity.” clearly defined role identity.
\ It is crucial to have autonomy since
The World Health Organization Report in 2001 this defines how a person interacts with
stated that “mental health is defined differently other people and the environment.
by different experts from different cultures.”
● Lack of autonomy can lead to
Concepts of mental health include the following: co-dependence among those
who cannot define themselves
a. Subjective well-being - may be defined as separate entities from people
as one’s personal (subjective) thoughts they depend on either
and feelings about one’s overall state of emotionally, physically, socially,
being. Mental health denotes positive spiritually, or even financially.
and healthy interpretations of a person’s
self-concept, and how a person feels ● Lack of autonomy can also lead
about himself. to relational conflicts as some
A positive warm regard for oneself people stay away from overly
serves as a foundation of mental dependent or “clingy; needy”
health. individuals.

b. Perceived self-efficacy - one’s d. Competence - the perception of one’s

perception of one’s value and worth, capacity to perform effectively a
effectiveness, and ability in performing function or activity using specific skills
a task or activity. and knowledge and achieving desired
results at a given time.
 Personal Development

● An individual who is competent ● They are spontaneous with their

will always assume full thoughts and behavior, and are
responsibility for the actions open to change.
and results of his behavior.
● They have a strong need for
● A competent person will adapt privacy and solitude as they
to the changes that can happen continue to strive in fulfilling
while he or she is in the thick of their potential.
things, understand why such
changes happen, and will adjust ● They are highly appreciative of
his or her actions and attitudes. events and people, and maintain
their awe and wonder of the
● Competence is gained through things around them.
time, a competent individual
produces trust with those he or ● They may often experience peak
she deals with. experiences of intense joy and
happiness which generate
e. Intergenerational Dependence - refers inspiration and strength.
to relationships between individuals
who belong to different generations
providing for each other’s many needs, Mental Health and Well-Being Model
such as financial assistance, nursing by Witmer and Sweeny (1991) -
care, and emotional support. referred to as the five life tasks.

● When the children have all 1. Essence or Spirituality - know

grown up, are pursuing their and celebrate the core of your
own dreams, and forming their person.
own “nests,” their parents, who 2. Work and Leisure - find
may already be retired by then, meaning in what you do and
are usually left at home. This enjoy it.
phenomenon is referred to as the 3. Friendship - we grow and
“empty nest.” develop based on our
relationships.
f. Self-Actualization of One’s 4. Love - glow in the warmth of
Intellectual and Emotional Potential loving yourself and others.
5. Self-Direction - be guided by
Maslow identified the key your values and principles.
characteristics of self-actualized
individuals: Related to these five tasks are 12 subtasks as
major components of wellness and well-being
● They have acceptance of their that comprise the Wheel of Wellness.
reality and have compassion to
help solve problems of other
people and society in general.
 Personal Development

Wheel of Wellness 1. Connect with people around you: your

family, friends, classmates, schoolmates,
1. Sense of Worth and neighbors. Spend time developing
2. Sense of Control these relationships.
3. Realistic Beliefs
4. Emotional Awareness and Coping 2. Be Active. Physical activity generates a
5. Problem Solving and Creativity positive sense of wellness. Engage in
6. Sense of Humor some sports or physical activity. It is
7. Nutrition important to find an activity you can
8. Physical Exercise enjoy and integrate in your daily life.
9. Self-Care
10. Stress Management 3. Keep Learning. Learning new skills or
11. General Identity obtaining new knowledge can give you
12. Cultural Identity a sense of achievement and a new
confidence.
It is important that the five tasks are balanced in
terms of time spent on each one, and of course, 4. Give to others. Giving to others is not
on the amount of energy one gives to fulfilling limited to money or other material
each of the tasks. The 12 subtasks are more of things. A smile or a warm and sincere
what one needs to own and practice to achieve greeting or thank you can brighten up
mental health and well-being. the day for both the giver and receiver.
Social involvement such as volunteering
Maintaining good mental health and well-being during disasters or helping out in your
requires resilience and adaptability, two community is also good for developing
important skills that need to be developed in mental health.
every person, particularly the adolescent.
5. Take Notice. Be in the here and now, be
Resiliency - the capacity to establish and in the present moment, be aware of what
maintain one’s balance and well-being in the is happening around you, your own
face of adversity. It is the ability to get back on thoughts and feelings, and the physical
one’s feet after a disaster or a crisis. sensations that you experience. This
awareness is also referred to as
Adaptability - the capacity to adjust to changes “mindfulness,” being mindful can
necessary for one’s survival and balance. positively change the way you feel
about life and how you approach
Support for Mental Health and Well-Being challenges.

There are five popular steps proposed by the

National Health Service of the United Kingdom
around the world to improve mental health and
well-being.
 Personal Development

Personal and Social Relationship ● Avoidant Attachment - when the

primary caregiver is cold and detached,
Relationship, according to the and even unresponsive to a child’s
Merriam-Webster's Learner Dictionary, is “the needs. The child senses detachment and
way in which two or more people, groups, self-reliances.
countries, etc., talk to, behave toward, and deal
with each other.” The definition is extended to ● Anxious-ambivalent Style - when the
include “the way in which two or more people or primary caregiver is not consistent in
things are connected.” terms of presence and meeting a child’s
emotional needs.
Types of Relationships
Attraction - when attraction between two
1. Business Transactional Relationship people is discussed, it is often understood as
2. Professional Relationship based on physical appearance. While this might
3. Family Relationship be true to a certain extent, there is more to
4. Family Relationship attraction than what we already know.
5. Friendly Relationship
6. Romantic Relationship a. Lust - driven by the sex hormones,
testerone, and estrogen. These hormones
Personal Relationship vs. Social Relationship affect both sexes.

Personal Relationship - a type of relationship b. Attraction - described as the

which is more intimate. Privacy and Intimacy love-struck phase, which involves
are two characteristics that define personal neurotransmitters in the brain such as
relationships. dopamine, norepinephrine, and
serotonin. This stage is when a person
Elements of Personal Relationship loses sleep and appetite over someone,
and swoons while daydreaming of this
Attachment - the Rozenberg Quarterly articles special person.
quotes research finding by Bowlby in 1982 that
our succeeding relationships in the future are all c. Attachment - when the couple in love
shaped to a large extent by our attachment to our decides to continue with the
parents (Larsen et. al., 2008). relationship, they enter the attachment
stage where long-lasting commitments
● Secure Attachment - when the primary are exchanged and may lead to raising a
caregiver is most of the time present and family. Special hormones are also
available when all the emotional needs secreted during this stage. Oxytocin,
of an infant are met, providing a sense which is released during childbirth to
of security to the infant. help in breastfeeding, is believed to
promote intimacy; and vasopressin,
which promotes long-term relationships.
 Personal Development

Theories related to Attraction and Liking Physical Attractiveness - several research

studies were conducted to confirm that physical
Aside from physiology, people are attracted to attractiveness is a major factor in liking
one another because of other reasons. The someone, and usually, first impression counts a
Rozenberg Quarterly article mentions several lot, too. Physical attractiveness connotes positive
theories and research results related to attraction health and reproductive fitness, which are both
and liking. essential to human survival.

Transference Effect - there are times we meet Personality Characteristics and Traits
people who we immediately like or dislike.
Usually, these people remind us of someone who People get attracted to two characteristics that
has affected our sense of self and our behavior. lead to liking the other person. These are:
empathetic people, who exclude warmth and
Propinquity Effect - a research conducted by sympathy, and who are also optimistic and
Festinger, Schachter, and Back in 1950 (as cited maintain positive views; socially competent
in Larsen et. al., 2008) points to proximity as people, who are good communicators and enjoy
another factor why we like a person. We often good conversation.
develop a sense of familiarity with people who
live close to us, work with us, or go to school These are many ways to express one’s attraction
with us, which leads us to liking them more. to another person. This may be conveyed
through words of appreciation and liking, or in
Similarity - we often like people who we have acts such as winking, smiling, engaging in small
similarities with, such as social class talk, giving gifts, doing errands, writing or
background, religious beliefs, age, and sending messages, or simply admitting to the
education. We are often attracted to like-minded other person that you are attracted to him or her.
people and those who have similar beliefs and
values as ours because the similarity is a Love and Intimacy
validation of our innermost values and belief
system, and who we are as a person. It is important to have an understanding of the
various concepts of love, and how these can
- According to a study conducted by influence the development of a person.
Aron, Kalick, and Hamilton in 1988 (as
cited in Larsen et al., 2008), similarity is Love - a feeling of deep affection, passion, or
a strong factor in friendship and in the strong liking for a person or thing.
selection of a mate because it gives a
common platform for understanding, The American Heritage Dictionary (n.d.) defines
which in turn promotes intimacy that is love as:
essential for trust, empathy, and
long-lasting relationships. ● A strong feeling of affection and
concern toward another person, as that
Reciprocity - we like people who like us back. arising from kinship or close friendship.
The more we are liked by someone we equally
like, the more we behave in ways that promote
mutual feelings of liking.
 Personal Development

● A strong feeling of affection and

concern for another person accompanied Responsibilities in a Relationship
by sexual attraction.
1. Be responsible for what you think and
● A feeling of devotion or adoration say to the other person.
toward God or a god, 2. Be responsible for what you promise to
do or not do. Integrity is a key factor in
● A feeling of kindness or concern by God relationships.
or a god towards humans. 3. Ensure the relationship is mutually
beneficial.
● Sexual desire or activity: the pleasures 4. Respect the other party or parties
of love; a night of love. involved.
5. Be ready to provide support when
Intimacy - being intimate with another person is needed.
about being open and vulnerable to that person
whom we deeply trust, who we feel connected Social Relationships - tend to be less intimate,
with, and who values us with unconditional with lesser self-disclosure involved, but may still
positive regards, which is viewing the other be exclusive, and demand certain levels of
person with complete trust and devoid of loyalty as in fraternities or religious
suspicion or negative thought. organizations, and to lesser extent, loosely
knitted social clubs like practitioners of certain
Commitment - an act of consistently fulfilling specialized professions.
and living by agreements made with another
person, entity or cause, and where the values of Social interactions affirm middle and late
integrity and respect serve as a guide to one’s adolescents' self-identity, increase their
behavior and thinking. Commitment in a love self-esteem, and develop their capacity to
relationship is expressed continuously in caring nurture relationships.
and loving actions for the beloved.
Goleman’s Social Intelligence Theory
Passion - the intense state of being that drives
and consumes a person to pursue an interest, a Daniel Goleman, author of the book of Social
vision, or a person. In terms of romantic love, Intelligence: The New Science of Human
passion connotes sexual attraction, as well as Relationships (2006), explained how our brains
intimacy. are wired to connect with other people, and how
part of the human brain located just above the
Intimacy - liking eyes, called the orbitofrontal cortex (OFC),
Commitment - empty love connected directly to the three major regions of
Passion - infatuation the brain: the cortex, the amygdala, and the brain
stem.
Intimacy + Passion = Romantic Love
Intimacy + Commitment = Companionate Orbitofrontal cortex - provides an immediate
Passion + Commitment = Fatuous Love connection between thoughts, emotions, and
Intimacy + Passion + Commitment = behaviors. It immediately calculates our feelings
Consummate Love and thoughts about a person and how that person
 Personal Development

feels and thinks about us, and what actions we Persuasion - used by one person or group to
take after this quick assessment. influence another to change their belief, actions,
or attitudes by appealing to reason or emotion.
Types of Social Influence
Identification - when a person is influenced by
Compliance - when a person seems to agree and someone he or she likes or looks up to, like a
follows what is requested or required of him or movie star, a social celebrity, or a superhero.
her to do or believe in but does not necessarily
have to really believe or agree to it. Reactance - when there is a willing rejection of
a social influence being exerted on an individual
Conformity - a type of social influence that or group. This is also known as anti or
involves a change in behavior, belief, or thinking non-conformity. It is a reverse reaction to some
to be like others. social influence that is being imposed by a
person or a group on another.
Obedience - another form of social influence
wherein a person follows what someone tells Leadership and Followership Theories
him or her to do, although it may not necessarily
reflect the person’s set of beliefs or values. A leader was often typecast as someone who is
Obedience usually stems from either respect or the head of a group of people by virtue of having
fear of the authority figure. great strength and wisdom, or may have
inherited a position of power even if strength
Internalization - when a person is able to own a and wisdom were not part of this person’s virtue.
certain belief or act and is willing to make it
known publicly and privately. Influence - plays a major role in leadership.
Leadership, as inferred from the writing of
Conversion - occurs when an individual Chester Barnard, is the ability of a person in
whole-heartedly changes his or her original positive of authority to influence others to
thinking and beliefs, actions, and attitudes to behave in such a manner that goals are achieved.
align with those of the other members of a
group. This also happens in a group when the Power - also annexed to leadership and that
original beliefs, attitudes, and behavior of the leadership and that a leader may obtain power
different members may have influenced each through various means and sources, such as
other to evolve a new set of beliefs, attitudes, position, giving rewards, expertise, respect, or
and behavior. Religious conversions are typical coercion.
of this type of social influence where
internalization happens to make the new set of 1. Trait Theory - defines leadership based
beliefs, attitudes, and actions become one’s own. on certain personality traits that are
generally suited for all leaders, such as
Minority Influence - happens when a bigger decisiveness, persistence, high level of
number of people are influenced by a much self-confidence, and assertiveness,
smaller number of people when the minority’s among others.
way of looking at and doing things is accepted.
 Personal Development

2. Behavioral Theory - presupposes that

leadership is a learned behavior, and that ● They walk their talk. They are
leaders are defined according to certain consistent in what they say and what
types of behavior they exhibit. they do, practicing what they are
preaching.
3. Participative Theory - the opposite of
an autocratic leader, the participative ● They adjust to situations and display
leader involves other people to make adaptability and flexibility, but are
common decisions. consistent with their values and real
selves even when they take on different
4. Situational Theory - assumes that there roles during different situations.
is no one style of leadership and that
leadership behavior is based on the ● They have a high level of comfort
factors present in a situation, and usually being themselves, even if they come
takes into consideration how followers from backgrounds that are different
behave. from the people or situations they deal
with.
5. Transactional Theory - states that
leadership involves a transaction or Family
negotiation of resources or position, and
usually employs reward and The simplest definition of what family is,
punishment. according to Merriam-Webster Online
Dictionary, “a group of individuals living under
6. Transformational Theory - involves a one roof and usually under one head,” which
vision, which a leader uses to rally may also be the definition of what a household
support from followers, and the role of is.
the leaders is in motivating others to
support the vision and make it happen. From a sociological point of view, Filipino
sociologist, Belen T. G. Medina, PhD, defined
Authentic Leadership family as “two or more people who share
resources, share responsibility for decisions,
In the book “Why should anyone be led by you?: share values and goals, and have commitment to
What It Takes to be an Authentic Leader” by each other over time” (as cited in Gregorio
Rob Goffee and Gareth Jones (2006), the authors Alfosin C. Andoyo’s The Filipino and Filipino
lined up three basic axioms of leadership, and Values.
these are:
Nuclear or Traditional family - comprised of a
1. Leadership is situational. father, mother, and their offspring/s
2. Leadership is non-hierarchical.
3. Leadership is relational. Single parent - who nurtures the child or
children while earning for the offspring/s. This
An authentic leader, according to Goffee and single parent may be supported by relatives or
Jones (2006), has following critical elements hired caregivers to take care of the growing
present: children.
 Personal Development

Extended family - a very common family Oftentimes, single parents try to become both
arrangement found in many parts of the world the mother and the father or may seek out a
and most particularly in Asia. It is the nuclear relative to stand in to compensate for the
family plus the parents of either the husband or absence of the other parent. Depending on how
the wife, or both their parents, depending on the the single parent manages the child, he or she
arrangements they make. may grow up either well-adjusted or
problematic.
Childless family - just the couples without any
child or children, who may be living all by Extended families have both positive and
themselves. They may or may not have negative influences on the child. On one hand,
household help assisting around the house. the presence of different generations within a
home provides the child a sense of stability in
As society progresses and diversity is more relationships as he or she witnessed firsthand
acknowledge by many, new variations of the how relationships can work and endure
basic family structures are surfacing, such as challenges, and to see a continuum in the family
interracial marriages, adoptive families, and line. The presence of grandparents provides the
lately, same-sex marriages. child a sense of anchoring or rooting to the
family’s history, thus, enabling the child to
Influence of Family Structure on the appreciate family heritage and traditions.
Adolescent
On the other hand, the presence of grandparents
The family is considered as the first place where may create some confusion to children,
growing children learn their basic social skills. particularly when the biological parents may
The interaction and quality of relationship adopt a parenting style that is opposite that of
between parent and child are said to determine the grandparents. This happens, for example,
the child’s future relationships as he or she when a parent would like to teach a child the
matures toward adulthood (Overbeek, Stattin, value of money or to delay gratification. Doting
Vermulst, Ha, & Engles, 2007, as cited in grandparents would often pamper and give in to
Papalia & Feldman, 2012). a grandchild’s whims as compensation for what
they perceive as their own shortcomings when
Family influences may vary based on the family they themselves were still parents.
structure present in the home. For the nuclear or
traditional family, the values, social skills, and Parental Authority and Parenting Styles
behavior are directly learned from the parents
(and/or primary caregivers). These are expressed Authoritative parenting - a key factor in the
in their unique parenting styles, the nature of psychosocial development of an adolescent, and
parental authority they practice, and the general it is believed to foster a healthy and positive
atmosphere at home. impact on the adolescent’s development.
Authoritative parents are those who insist on
For a single parent family, the absence of one their child learning important values, norms, and
parent (either the father or the mother) may rules, but also willing to sit down to listen and
create an impact on the growing child who negotiate with them should they resist (Papalia
would normally look up to authority as role & Feldman, 2012).
models.
 Personal Development

Albert Bandura’s (1977) Theory of Social Oftentimes, conflict follows a cycle of

Learning retaliation. Conflict is started by what is known
as a “triggering event”, which happens when
1. Learning takes place through an act of one party is perceived as a threat by the
observation (or modeling). other party.

2. Mental states are important to learning, Conflict Stages

which means that a child’s learning can
be self-reinforced or rewarded if there is Intrapersonal - with oneself, like when one is
satisfaction or pride in what was indecisive about things.
learned.
Interpersonal - among two or more individuals,
3. Not all learning can lead to changes in like having a misunderstanding between friends,
behavior. family members, or lovers.

Parents can serve as the models to their Intragroup - within the same interest group,
adolescents for them to emulate while at the like a student organization.
same time supporting their development toward
young adulthood. Intergroup - between two or more groups, like
fraternities.
Conflict
Responses to Conflict
Conflict - the dynamic when two or more
people, organizations, or nations perceive one Facing conflict involves several types of
another as a threat to their needs or interests. behavior. One is to directly confront the other
Conflict is perceived incompatibility of actions person and engage in a peaceful dialogue.
or goals between people or nations and happens However, when emotions are running high,
when there is an imbalance between concern for violent behavior usually occurs, such as the use
oneself and those of others. Individuals and of foul language, physical harm, verbal threats,
organizations without conflict are either in ostracizing the other party in public, spreading
denial, have genuine concern for others, or rumors to destroy the other person’s reputation,
simply apathetic. filing a lawsuit against the other party, and in
case of labor groups, picketing or going on
The Nature of Conflict strike.

Conflict inflicts so much pain and negative In the book, Meditation for Managers: Resolving
emotions on those involved. Reasoning is often Conflict and Rebuilding Relationships at Work
clouded, and miscommunication occurs by John Crawley and Katherine Graham (2002;
especially at the height of an emotional 2007), the authors identified four strategies that
argument when words are exchanged to inflict people can use when in conflict in the
harm on the other. workplace:
 Personal Development

Fight - force the other party to accept a stand ● Understands and accepts the uniqueness
that is against the party’s interest. and differences of other people.

Submit - yield to the demands of the other party ● Strengthen the resolve of the parties to
and agree to end the conflict. pursue common goals.

Flee - leave the situation where the conflict is ● Encourages dialogue and empowerment.
occuring or change the topic.
Conflict Management Styles
Freeze - do nothing and just wait for the other
party’s next move or allow the pressure to build According to Thomas and Kilmann (2008), there
up. are two dimensions to this conflict-handling
behavior:
Conflicts may arise due to the following (Myers,
2013): Assertiveness - the extent to which a person will
try to satisfy his or her own needs or interests.
● Miscommunication between parties.
Cooperativeness - the extent to which a person
● Misjudging another person’s or group’s will attempt to satisfy the other person’s needs
belief system born out of prejudice or or interests.
bias.
Based on these two dimensions, there are five
● Exhibiting behaviors that are destructive modes in dealing with conflict. These are:
to another person’s well-being or
reputation. 1. Competing - assertive and
uncooperative. An individual’s interests
Positive Effects of Conflict are above all else; power and authority
are often used to win against others.
Conflict could also serve as a driver or impetus
for growth in the relationship between two 2. Accommodating - unassertive and
people, groups, nations. cooperative. An individual is willing to
neglect his or her interests or needs for
Personal relationships can be resolved through the sake of the other person, yielding
genuine communication and healthy dialogue, one’s position and allowing the other to
trust, respect, and caring. Relationships often pursue his or her position at the other’s
grow deeper and more satisfying because it: expense.

● Allows for issues to surface. 3. Compromising - moderately assertive

and moderately cooperative. An
● Raises the awareness of both parties’ individual is neither here nor there; it
needs. refers to splitting whatever is at stake in
half to partly satisfy both parties just to
● Allows emotions to be expressed. get over the problem.
 Personal Development

4. Avoiding - unassertive and ● Realistic type - people who like

uncooperative. The individual prefers to mechanical, outdoor activities.
stay out of the situation either by
postponing a decision, taking a ● Investigative type - people who like to
wait-and-see position, or withdrawing watch and learn about the world around
completely until conditions are better. them, they are generally quiet; they
spend time thinking to solve difficult
5. Collaborating - assertive and problems.
cooperative. The individual seeks a
mutually satisfying solution by ● Artistic type - are creative, artistic,
understanding the needs and interests of imaginative.
the other person and expanding the
resources rather than competing over ● Social type - talkative, friendly, and
them; seeks a win-win solution. interested in helping or teaching others.

Negotiating through a Personal Conflict ● Enterprising type - people who like to

Situation influence, lead, and persuade other
people.
● Understand the nature of the conflict.
● Conventional type - like to work with
● Acknowledge your feelings and numbers.
emotions.
Holland believes that a good career must find
● Examine your relationship with this congruence in the interaction between a
person. personality type and a work environment type.

● Clarify your intentions. Super’s Developmental Theory

Career Development A popular and most influential theory in career

development was developed by Donald Super,
Career choice often poses a dilemma at this an American renowned career development
point in your life. You may have been thinking theorist, and professor at Columbia University.
of what kind of work you want to do in the Super’s Developmental Theory is based on the
future. But you just do not know where to start belief that self-concept changes over time and
and how to go about it. develops as a result of experience.

Theories in Career Development Self-Concept - how a person looks at himself.

He or she may either assess himself or herself
Personality type theory - John Holland, poorly, or he or she may be confident of his or
Professor Emeritus of Sociology at John her abilities.
Hopkins University, and an American
psychologist, developed a theory of careers of
the individual with the type of environment
where his or her work is.
 Personal Development

which are often referred to as “industry

positions” in contrast to academia.

Resume and Curriculum Vitae

Resume - a document that summarizes your

career history, skills, and education. The term
originates from the French word résumé, which
translates to “abstract” or “summary.”

CV or Curriculum Vitae (latin word for

“course of life” - a detailed and comprehensive
document which describes the course of your
academic and professional accomplishments.

The differences between a resume and a CV

● A resume should be a concise and

curated collection of your professional
experience, skills, and qualifications that
are strictly relevant to the job you’re
applying for.

● A CV presents an in-depth history of

your professional and academic
credentials and accomplishments.

● CVs are mostly used to apply for

academic roles or programs, grants,
fellowships, and research or teaching
positions.

● Resumes are used when applying for

jobs in the private or public sectors