CHAPTER 3: PERSONALITY AND CONFLICT STYLES

Personality encompasses a person’s relatively stable feelings, thoughts, and

behavioral patterns. Each of us has a unique personality that differentiates us from
other people, and understanding someone’s personality gives us clues about how that
person is likely to act and feel in a variety of situations. To manage conflict
effectively, it is helpful to understand the personalities of different employees. Having
this knowledge is also useful for placing people into jobs and organizations.

Big Five Personality Traits

When researchers analyzed the traits describing personality characteristics, they
realized that many different words were actually pointing to a single dimension of
personality. When these words were grouped, five dimensions seemed to emerge, and
these explain much of the variation in our personalities.

The Big Five dimensions are openness, conscientiousness, extroversion,

agreeableness, and neuroticism—if you put the initials together, you get the acronym
OCEAN. Everyone has some degree of each of these traits; it is the unique
configuration of how high a person rates on some traits and how low on others that
produces the individual quality we call personality.

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 Openness is the degree to which a person is curious, original, intellectual,
creative, and open to new ideas.
 Conscientiousness refers to the degree to which a person is organized,
systematic, punctual, achievement-oriented, and dependable.
 Extroversion is the degree to which a person is outgoing, talkative, sociable, and
enjoys socializing.
 Agreeableness is the degree to which a person is affable, tolerant, sensitive,
trusting, kind, and warm.
 Neuroticism refers to the degree to which a person is anxious, irritable,
temperamental, and moody.

Cognitive and Personal-Social Dispositions

1. Cognitive Dispositions
Cognitive dispositions refer to general patterns of mental processes that impact how
people respond and react to the world around them. These dispositions (or one’s
natural mental or emotional outlook) take on several different forms. For our
purposes, we’ll briefly examine the four identified by John Daly (2011): locus of
control, cognitive complexity, authoritarianism/dogmatism, and emotional
intelligence.
Locus of Control
As we have previous learned, individuals differ with respect to how much control they
perceive they have over their behaviour and life circumstances. People with an
internal locus of control believe that they can control their behavior and life
circumstances. For example, people with an internal locus of control would believe
that their careers and choice of job are ultimately a product of their behaviors and
decisions. The opposite is an external locus of control, or the belief that an
individual’s behavior and circumstances exist because of forces outside the
individual’s control. An individual with an external locus of control might believe that
their career is a matter of luck or divine intervention. This individual would also be
more likely to blame outside forces if their work life isn’t going as desired.

Cognitive Complexity
Cognitive complexity has been defined in terms of the number of different constructs
an individual has to describe others (differentiation), the degree to which those
constructs cohere (integration), and the level of abstraction of the constructs
(abstractiveness)”. Overall, cognitive complexity is a critical cognitive disposition
because it directly impacts interpersonal relationships. According to Brant Burleson
and Scott Caplan (1998) cognitive complexity impacts several interpersonal
constructs:
1. Form more detailed and organized impressions of others;
2. Better able to remember impressions of others;
3. Better able to resolve inconsistencies in information about others;
4. Learn complex social information quickly; and
5. Use multiple dimensions of judgment in making social evaluations.

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Authoritarianism/Dogmatism
According to Jason Wrench, James C. McCroskey, and Virginia Richmond (2008),
two personality characteristics that commonly impact interpersonal communication
are authoritarianism and dogmatism. Authoritarianism is a form of social
organization where individuals favor absolute obedience to authority (or authorities)
as opposed to individual freedom. The highly authoritarian individual believes that
individuals should just knowingly submit to their power. Individuals who believe in
authoritarianism but are not in power believe that others should submit themselves to
those who have power. Dogmatism, although closely related, is not the same thing as
authoritarianism. Dogmatism is defined as the inclination to believe one’s point-of-
view as undeniably true based on faulty premises and without consideration of
evidence and the opinions of others. Individuals who are highly dogmatic believe
there is generally only one point-of-view on a specific topic, and it’s their point-of-
view.
Right-Wing Authoritarianism
Right-wing authoritarians (RWAs) tend to have three specific characteristics:
1. RWAs believe in submitting themselves to individuals they perceive as
established and legitimate authorities.
2. RWAs believe in strict adherence to social and cultural norms.
3. RWAs tend to become aggressive towards those who do not submit to
established, legitimate authorities and those who violate social and cultural
norms.
Please understand that the use of the term “right-wing” does not imply the same
political connotation that is often associated with it in the North America.
Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence is essential for successful relationships and conflict
management. Emotional intelligence (EQ) is important for interpersonal
communication because individuals who are higher in EQ tend to be more sociable
and less socially anxious. As a result of both sociability and lowered anxiety, high EQ
individuals tend to be more socially skilled and have higher quality interpersonal
relationships.
Affective Orientation
Affective orientation (AO) is the degree to which people are aware of their emotions,
perceive them as important, and actively consider their affective responses in making
judgments and interacting with others. Under the auspices of AO, the general
assumption is that highly affective-oriented people are (1) cognitively aware of their
own and others’ emotions, and (2) can implement emotional information in
communication with others.

2. Personal-Social Dispositions
Social-personal dispositions refer to general patterns of mental processes that impact
how people socially relate to others or view themselves.

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Loneliness
The first social-personal disposition is loneliness or an individual’s emotional distress
that results from a feeling of solitude or isolation from social relationships. Loneliness
can generally be discussed as existing in one of two forms: emotional and
social. Emotional loneliness results when an individual feels that they do not have an
emotional connection with others. We generally get these emotional connections
through our associations with loved ones and close friends. If an individual is
estranged from their family or doesn’t have close friendships, then he or she may feel
loneliness as a result of a lack of these emotional relationships. Social loneliness, on
the other hand, results from a lack of a satisfying social network. Imagine you’re
someone who has historically been very social. Still, you move to a new city and find
building new social relationships very difficult because the people in the new location
are very cliquey. The inability to develop a new social network can lead someone to
feelings of loneliness because they may feel a sense of social boredom or
marginalization.
Depression
Depression is a psychological disorder characterized by varying degrees of
disappointment, guilt, hopelessness, loneliness, sadness, and self-doubt, all of which
negatively impact a person’s general mental and physical well-being. Depressed
people tend to be less satisfied with life and less satisfied with their interpersonal
interactions as well. Research has shown that depression negatively impacts all forms
of interpersonal relationships: dating, friends, families, work, etc. An individual’s
ability to manage their emotions and engage in conflict may be impacted if they are
currently experiencing an episode of depression. As we have previously discussed,
when an individual experiences stressors at work that they do not feel equipped to
deal with, this can pose a risk to mental health.
Self-Esteem
Self-esteem consists of your sense of self-worth and the level of satisfaction you have
with yourself; it is how you feel about yourself. A good self-image raises your self-
esteem; a poor self-image often results in poor self-esteem, lack of confidence, and
insecurity. Not surprisingly, individuals with low self-esteem tend to have more
problematic interpersonal relationships and may have difficulty asserting their needs
and boundaries.
Narcissism
Ovid’s story of Narcissus and Echo has been passed down through the ages. The story
starts with a Mountain Nymph named Echo who falls in love with a human named
Narcissus. When Echo reveals herself to Narcissus, he rejects her. In true Roman
fashion, this slight could not be left unpunished. Echo eventually leads Narcissus to a
pool of water where he quickly falls in love with his reflection. He ultimately dies,
staring at himself, because he realizes that his love will never be met. In modern
times, narcissism is defined a personality trait characterized by overly high self-
esteem, self-admiration, and self-centeredness. Highly narcissistic individuals are
completely self-focused and tend to ignore the communicative needs and emotions of

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others. In social situations, highly narcissistic individuals strive to be the center of
attention
Machiavellianism
In 1513, Nicolo Machiavelli wrote a text called The Prince. Although Machiavelli
dedicated the book to Lorenzo di Piero de’ Medici, who was a member of the ruling
Florentine Medici family, the book was originally scribed for Lorenzo’s uncle. In The
Prince, Nicolo Machiavelli unabashedly describes how he believes leaders should
keep power. First, he notes that traditional leadership virtues like decency, honor, and
trust should be discarded for a more calculating approach to leadership. Most
specifically, Machiavelli believed that humans were easily manipulated, so ultimately,
leaders can either be the ones influencing their followers or wait for someone else to
wield that influence in a different direction.
Empathy
As we have previously learned, empathy is the ability to recognize and mutually
experience another person’s attitudes, emotions, experiences, and thoughts. Highly
empathic individuals have the unique ability to connect with others interpersonally,
because they can truly see how the other person is viewing life. Individuals who are
unempathetic generally have a hard time taking or seeing another person’s
perspective, so their interpersonal interactions tend to be more rigid and less
emotionally driven. Generally speaking, people who have high levels of empathy tend
to have more successful and rewarding interactions with others when compared to
unempathetic individuals. Furthermore, people who are interacting with a highly
empathetic person tend to find those interactions more satisfying than when
interacting with someone who is unempathetic. The ability to take perspective and
show genuine concern and connection to others is a highly valuable skill in
interpersonal interactions, especially during the conflict process.
Self-Monitoring
The last of the personal-social dispositions is referred to as self-monitoring. In 1974
Mark Snyder developed his basic theory of self-monitoring, which proposes that
individuals differ in the degree to which they can control their behaviors following the
appropriate social rules and norms involved in interpersonal interaction. In this
theory, Snyder proposes that there are some individuals adept at selecting appropriate
behavior in light of the context of a situation, which he deems high self-monitors.
High self-monitors want others to view them in a precise manner (impression
management), so they enact communicative behaviors that ensure suitable or
favorable public appearances. On the other hand, some people are merely
unconcerned with how others view them and will act consistently across differing
communicative contexts despite the changes in cultural rules and norms. Snyder
called these people low self-monitors.

Types of Deviant Workplace Behaviour

Deviant workplace behaviour is defined as voluntary behavior of organizational
members that violates significant organizational norms and practices or threatens the
well-being of the organization and its members.Research on problem people in the

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workplace tends to demonstrate that we have problem people at all levels of the
organization. We have problematic bosses, peers, and subordinates. In an attempt to
understand the types of problem people individuals face in the workplace, in 2002
Janie Harden Fritz created a typology of the different types of problem people we
encounter in the workplace, which was later updated in 2009 (Harden Fritz, 2009).
Figure 9.3 shows the typology. In this typology, Harden Fritz discusses how different
positions in the workplace can lead to varying types of problem people. Let’s examine
each of these types.

Problem Bosses
Through Harden Fritz’s research into bosses, she found that there are six common
types of problematic bosses: different, okay good old boy/girl, toxic, self-centered
taskmaster, and intrusive harasser.
 The Different Boss
First, The Different Boss is someone a subordinate sees as distractingly different
from them as a person. Different subordinates are going to view what is “distractingly
different” in a wide range of different ways. Some people who view their bosses as
“distractingly different” may also be succumbing to their prejudices about people
from various social groups.
 Good Old Boy or Good Old Girl Boss
Second, is the Good Old Boy or Good Old Girl Boss. This type of boss is someone
who probably hasn’t progressed along with the modern world of corporate thinking.
This person may be gregarious and outgoing, but this person tends to see the “old
ways of doing things” as best – even when they’re problematic. These individuals
tend to see sexual harassment as something that isn’t a big deal in the workplace.
Their subordinates are also more likely to view some of their behaviors as unethical.
 Okay Boss
The third type of boss is the Okay Boss. This person is exactly like the name says,
okay and average in just about every way possible. These individuals are, in many
ways, coasting towards retirement. They try not to rock the boat within the
organization, so they will never stand up to their bosses, nor will they advocate for
their subordinates. For someone who likes work and wants to succeed in life, working
for one of these people can be very frustrating because they like the average and can
create an environment where the average is the norm, and people who exceed the
average are the outcasts.
 The Toxic Boss
Fourth, we have the Toxic Boss. These bosses are just all-around problematic in the
workplace. These people are often seen as unethical, obnoxious, and unprofessional
by their subordinates. These are the types of bosses that can create reasonably hostile
work environments and pit employees against each other for their amusement.
However, when it comes to harassing behavior, they are less likely to engage in
harassment directly. Still, they can often create environments where both sexual
harassment and bullying become the norm.
 Self-Centered Taskmaster

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The fifth type of problematic boss is the Self-Centered Taskmaster. The self-
centered taskmaster is ultimately “focused on getting the job done to advance his/her
own goals, without concern for others” (Harden Fritz, 2009, p. 31). This type of boss
is purely focused on getting work done. This individual may be excessive in the
amount of work they give subordinates. Ultimately, this individual wants to show
their superiors how good of a boss they are to move up the organizational hierarchy.
On the flip side, these people are highly competent, but their tendency to lord power
over others in an obnoxious way makes working for this type of boss very stressful.
 The Intrusive Harasser Boss
Sixth, we have the Intrusive Harasser Boss. This individual tends to be highly
interfering and often wants to get caught up in their subordinates’ personal and
professional lives. They are likely to be overly attentive in the workplace, which can
interfere with an individual’s ability to complete their task assignments. Furthermore,
this boss is likely to be one who engages in activities like sexual harassment,
backstabbing, and busybody behavior.

Problem Coworkers
Through Harden Fritz’s research into coworkers, she found that there are eight
common types of problematic coworkers: adolescent, bully, mild annoyance,
independent self-promoter, pushy playboy/playgirl, independent other, soap opera
star, and the abrasive, incompetent harasser.
 Adolescent
The first common problematic coworker you can have is the Adolescent. The
adolescent is the Peter Pan of the business world, they don’t want to grow up. These
people tend to want to be the center of attention and will be the first to let everyone
know when they’ve accomplished something. You almost feel like you need to give
them a reward just for doing their job. However, if someone dares to question them,
they tend to become very defensive, probably because they don’t want others to know
how insecure they feel.
 Bully
Second, we have the Bully. As we have previously discussed, bully is still common in
many Canadian workplaces. This individual has a knack of being overly demanding
on their peers, but then dares to take credit for their peers’ work when the time comes.
This is your prototypical schoolyard bully all grown up and in an office job. In 2005,
Charlotte Rayner and Loraleigh Keashly (2005) examined the available definitions for
“workplace bullying” and derived at five specific characteristics:
1. the experience of negative behavior;
2. behaviors experienced persistently;
3. targets experiencing damage;
4. targets labeling themselves as bullied; and
5. targets with less power and difficulty defending themselves.
 Mild Annoyance
The third type of problematic coworker is the Mild Annoyance. When it comes down
to it, this person isn’t going to ruin your day, but they are mildly annoying and tend to

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be so on a routine basis. Maybe it’s a coworker who wants to come in every morning
and talk to you about what they watched on television the night before while you’re
trying to catch up on email. Or maybe it’s the coworker who plays music a little too
loudly in the workplace. There are all kinds of things that can annoy us as human
beings, so the mildly annoying coworker is one that generally is tolerated.
 Independent Self-Promoter
Fourth, we have the Independent Self-Promoter. The independent self-promoter is
someone who likes to toot their own horn at work. This individual tends to be slight to
extremely narcissistic and thinks the world revolves around them. These individuals
are not the type to take credit for other people’s work, but they also aren’t the type to
do work that needs to be done unless they see its utility in making them look good.
 Pushy Playboy/Playgirl
The fifth problematic coworker is the Pushy Playboy/Playgirl. The pushy
playboy/playgirl is an individual marked by their tendency to push other coworkers
into doing things for them. Often these tasks have nothing to do with work at all. For
example, the pushy playboy/playgirl would be the type of person to demand that a
younger or more submissive coworker run down the street for a Starbucks run.
Furthermore, these are the types of people who tend to be overly demanding of
coworkers and then misrepresent their performance to those higher up in the corporate
hierarchy.
 Independent Other
The sixth common problematic coworker is the Independent Other. In many ways,
the independent other is similar to the different bosses discussed earlier. These people
tend to be perceived as uniquely different from their coworkers. There are a lot of
characteristics that can make someone viewed as uniquely other. Any specific
demographic that goes against the workplace norm could be cause for perceiving
someone as different: age, sex, gender, sexual orientation, religion, ethnicity, race,
etc.… Some people may view them as having a low work ethic, but this perception
may stem out of that perceived “otherness.”
 Soap Opera Star
The seventh common problematic coworker identified by Harden Fritz (2009) is the
Soap Opera Star. The soap opera star lives for drama in the workplace. New rumors
of office romances? This person tends to be a busybody and will be all up in
everyone’s business both at work and in their personal lives. Because of their
tendency towards drama (both finding it and often creating it), they are generally seen
as highly distracting by their peers. At the same time, they tend to spend so much time
digging for office gossip that they are typically perceived as having a poor work ethic
by others.
 Abrasive, Incompetent Harasser
The final type of problematic coworker is the Abrasive, Incompetent Harasser,
which is an individual who tends to be highly uncivil in the workplace with a
particular emphasis on sexually harassing behavior. This coworker is very similar to
the intrusive harasser boss discussed earlier. This individual is generally viewed as

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incompetent and unprofessional in the workplace. This person tends to score high on
all of the problematic work behaviors commonly seen by coworkers.

Problem Subordinates
In the two previous sections, we’ve looked at problematic bosses and coworkers, but
subordinates can also be a bit of a problem in the workplace. For this reason, Harden
Fritz (2009) identified five clear troublesome subordinates: the okay subordinate, the
abrasive harasser, the bully, the different other, and the incompetent renegade.
 Okay Subordinate
First, we have the Okay Subordinate. Just like the name sounds, this person is not
stellar, nor is this person awful; this person is just OK. This person does tend towards
being a mildly annoying busybody at work. Still, none of their behavior rises to the
status where a supervisor would need to step in and counsel the employee’s behavior
formally.
 Abrasive Harasser
Second, we have the Abrasive Harasser. The abrasive harasser is an individual who
tends to be someone who needs counseling regularly about what constitutes sexual
harassment. They may not even always realize what types of behavior are appropriate
in the workplace. For example, this subordinate could forward their supervisor a
sexual joke via email without thinking others could perceive the joke as inappropriate
in the workplace. On the more advanced end, you have people who are perpetual
sexual harassers who need to be severely counseled to protect the organization and
start the process of firing the person for harassing behavior.
 The Bully
The next common problem subordinate is the Bully. According to Harden Fritz, this
subordinate is one “who bosses others, usurps authority, is competitive and is at the
same time insecure” (Harden Fritz, 2009, p. 40). If this person’s behavior is not
curtailed by their supervisor, this type of behavior can quickly become infectious and
end up hurting cohesion throughout the entire office. Furthermore, supervisors need to
recognize this behavior and ensure that the targets of the bully have a safe and secure
place to work. Don’t be surprised if this person decides to bully upward, or attempt to
bully their supervisor because it can happen.
 The Different Other
The fourth common problem subordinate is the Different Other. Just like the two
previous versions of “difference” discussed for bosses and coworkers, the different
other is a subordinate who is perceived as distinctly different from their supervisor.
One thing we know from years of management research is that people who are
perceived as different from their supervisors are less likely to enjoy protective and
mentoring relationships with their supervisors. As such, when a supervisor views
someone as a “different other,” they may engage in subconscious discriminatory
behavior towards their subordinate.
 Incompetent Renegade
Finally, we have the Incompetent Renegade. This individual tends to be ethically
incompetent and views themself as above the law within the organization. This

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individual may view themself as better than the organization to begin with, which
causes a lot of problems around the office. However, instead of accomplishing their
work, this person is more likely to take credit for others’ work. If this subordinate is
allowed to keep behaving in this manner, they will be viewed by others as running the
place. For this reason, subordinates need to stop this behavior when they see it
occurring and immediately initiate counseling to stop the behavior and build a case
for termination if the behavior does not cease.

Dealing with Deviant Behaviour in the Workplace

Have you ever encountered any of these deviant behaviours in your workplace? Can
you recognize any times that you have engaged in these behaviours yourself?
While we can’t control other people and what they do and say, we can control our
own perspectives and actions. We can also be aware of our own triggers and why
another person poses a challenge to us. Sometimes it has nothing to do with them at
all! When we encounter deviant behaviour, we can also assert and reinforce our
boundaries using assertive language

ABCs of Conflict
Over the years, a number of different patterns for handling conflict have arisen in the
literature, but most of them agree with the first two proposed by Walton and
McKersie, but they generally add a third dimension of conflict: avoidance. In this
framework, there are three conflict management styles that form the acronym ABC.
They are:
 Avoiders,
 Battlers, and
 Collaborators.
Avoiders
Alan Sillars, Stephen, Coletti, Doug Parry, and Mark Rogers (1982) created a
taxonomy of different types of strategies that people can use when avoiding conflict.
Battlers
For our purposes, we have opted to describe those who engage in distributive conflict
as battlers because they often see going into a conflict as heading off to war, which is
most appropriately aligned with the distributive conflict management strategies.
Battlers believe that conflict should take on an approach where the battler must win
the conflict at all costs without regard to the damage they might cause along the way.
Furthermore, battlers tend to be very personalistic in their goals and are often highly
antagonistic towards those individuals with whom they are engaging in conflict
Collaborators
The last type of conflicting partners are collaborators. There are a range of
collaborating choices, from being completely collaborative in an attempt to find a
mutually agreed upon solution, to being compromising when you realize that both
sides will need to win and lose a little to come to a satisfactory solution. In both cases,
the goal is to use prosocial communicative behaviors in an attempt to reach a solution
everyone is happy with. Admittedly, this is often easier said than done. Furthermore,

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it’s entirely possible that one side says they want to collaborate, and the other side
refuses to collaborate at all. When this happens, collaborative conflict management
strategies may not be as effective, because it’s hard to collaborate with someone who
truly believes you need to lose the conflict.

Before we conclude this section, it is important to point out that conflict management
strategies are often reciprocated by others. If you start a conflict in a highly
competitive way, do not be surprised when your conflicting partner mirrors you and
starts using distributive conflict management strategies in return. The same is also
true for integrative conflict management strategies. When you start using integrative
conflict management strategies, you can often deescalate a problematic conflict by
using integrative conflict management strategies

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