CLASS MATERIAL

WEEK 12
CEL2103 WRITING ACADEMIC TEXTS
SEMESTER 1, 2021-2022

Editing and Revising the Essay

Common language errors in an essay
- Punctuation
- Subject-verb Agreement
- Tenses
- Vocabulary
- Spelling
After you have written your essay, the final stage is to revise and edit the essay. In this
stage, you look for any errors that can be found in the essay. Some errors not only could
make reading difficult, but it could also affect the meaning that you want to convey.

Common Language Errors: Punctuation

Punctuation can make a significant difference in the meaning of your sentences. By following
the basic rules of punctuation, you are able to communicate your ideas appropriately through
your writing.

Activity 1
Below are the commonly used punctuation in academic writing. Write the rules and provide
examples for each punctuation.

No. Punctuations Rules

1 Period While capital letters mark the beginning of a sentence, a period
marks the end of a sentence. A period is used to indicate the
end of a statement, command and indirect question. A period
signals the end of a thought.

e.g. Tea seems to be a better choice for a healthier heart

because of the presence of antioxidants.

2 Comma To indicate a separation of ideas or elements within the

structure of a sentence.
 To separate a list of similar words or phrases
e.g. Better job opportunities, access to public
transportation and large social network are the
advantages of living in the city.
 To separate clauses (two independent clauses)
e.g. Formality is a common practice among Japanese,
and it is associated with politeness.
 To mark non-defining clauses that usually add extra,
non-essential information about the noun or noun
phrase.
 e.g. Tokyo, Japan’s capital city, is the world’s largest
Metropolitan area, with a population of 32.5 million
people.

3 Quotation marks Quotation marks show the beginning and end of a person’s
exact words or a little of a work.
e.g. The Enlish word nuance comes from a Middle French word
meaning “shades of color”.

4 Colon  To introduce lists

e.g. There are three types of muscle in the body: smooth
and skeletal.
 To indicate a subtitle
e.g. Japan and the United States: Different but Alike.
 To explain or justify the preceding statement.
e.g. The research is conclusive: climate change is a
reality.
 Do not use a colon after a verb that introduces a list.
e.g. x The things that concern a teenager are:
appearance, love and freedom.
/ The things that concern a teenager are the following:
appearance, love and freedom.

5 Semi-colon  To separate two related independent clauses

e.g. In Singapore, the president fulfils the functions of
both political leader and head of state; however, these
two functions are separate in Malaysia.

6 Apostrophe  To show possession

e.g. Russia’s population has been shrinking because the
birth rate is fairly low although it has increased in recent
years.
  To indicate a contraction – However, contractions are
not used in academic writing.
e.g. There’s comparatively little immigration to Russia
while in the United States, immigration adds 2.3 millions
people per year.

Activity 2
Punctuate the following text and change the capitalisation when necessary.

Question 1
conversely in the past only rich people would have access to formal education therefore
most people did not have a lot of opportunities to study

Answer:
Conversely, in the past, only rich people would have access to formal education; therefore,
most people did not have a lot of opportunities to study.

Question 2
the majority of the people who watch football in the United States and Saudi Arabia tend to
be interested in playing the game however it is not allowed for women in saudi arabia to play
football for religious reasons meanwhile in the UK England has one of the best womens
teams in the world (Ezine Articles 2007)

Answer:
The majority of the people who watch football in the United States and Saudi Arabia tend to
be interested in playing the game. However, it is not allowed for women in Saudi Arabia to
play football for religious reasons. Meanwhile in the UK, England has one of the best women
teams in the world (Ezine Articles, 2007).
Question 3
when comparing between living in a city and living in a rural area one should consider some
salient points cost of living space and accessibility an article entitled Country Living versus
Urban Living suggests that as both options have advantages and drawbacks it is vital for a
person to recognise his or her priorities before investing on the property location

Answer:
When comparing between living in a city and living in a rural area one should consider some
salient points; cost of living, space and accessibility. An article entitled “Country Living
versus Urban Living” suggests that as both options have advantages and drawbacks, it is
vital for a person to recognise his or her priorities before investing on the property location.

Activity 3
The text below contains punctuation errors. Identify and correct the errors.

One similarity between Brazil and the United States is the diversity of the population. Brazil
was colonised by Europeans, and its culture has been greatly influenced by this fact.
However, Brazilians’ identity was influenced by many other cultures as well. According to
Wenger (2018), other than the indigenous people, Brazil is a melting pot of many ethnic
groups that immigrated there. Similarly, the United States also has a diversity of ethnic
groups from the Native American population and early colonists from northern Europe to
slave groups from Africa. Later immigrants from the Mediterranean, Asia and South America
added to the diversity of its citizens. The mixture of cultures and customs has worked to form
ethnically rich cultures in both countries.

Adapted from Muchmore-Vokoun, A., Solomon, E. & Folse, K. (2019). Great writing 4: Great Essays
(5th ed.). Cengage Learning.

Common Language Errors: Tenses

Activity 4

Fill in the blanks with the correct tenses (simple present / simple past / present perfect) of
the verbs in the parenthesis.

1. Over the years, technology evidently has changed (change) our society.

2. In the past, technology was (be) not really familiarised, thus the old generation had (has)
to ensure that their task is done without any programmed device that they could use.

3. International students constitute (constitute) 30% of the university’s enrolment at present.

4. An undergraduate student from a local university recently has created (create) this user-
friendly website.

5. Transition signals are very helpful because they indicate (indicate) the relationship
between sentences.

6. In the last two years, the students have demanded (demand) better healthcare service
from the university.

Activity 5
The text below contains tenses errors. Identify the errors and write the word with the correct
tense.

Question 1

Medicine (1) has (have) a history spanning many thousands of years and specialised
establishments for treating the sick have also existed for eons. Despite the fact that function
of hospitals (2) have (have) not changed much during the last century, technological and
scientific progress (3) has made (make) possible treatment approaches that could not have
been implemented a hundred years ago, and this (4) has made (make) a large contribution
to health care. The main differences between hospitals today and a century ago (5) are (be)
improved surgical techniques, safer use of anaesthesia and safer childbirth procedures.

Question 2

Modern teenagers are more educated than teenagers a hundred years ago. One of the
effects of an easily accessed education is that the youth (1) have become (become) more
dynamic and socially active these days. They now (2) tend (tend) to question and test the
norms and traditions of their society. By doing so, the youth (3) have become (become) a
source of societal change in many countries since a few decades ago. Due to the fact that
teenagers, a hundred years ago, (4) lacked (lack) the access to quality education, they (5)
lived (live) a sedentary life. In other words, they (6) were (be) more conservative and (7)
adhered (adhere) to the social norms laid down by their society.

Common Language Errors: Subject-verb Agreement

Activity 6
The text below contains subject-verb agreement errors. Identify the errors and write the
correct forms of subject-verb agreement.
 Japan and the United States: Different but Alike

One significant similarity between Japan and the United States is that both Japanese and
Americans has (have) always emphasised the importance of work, and both are paying
penalties for their commitment to it: increasing stress and weakening family bonds. People in
the United States, especially those in business, regularly puts (put) in twelve or more hours a
day at their jobs, just as many Japanese executives does (do). Also, while the normal
Japanese workweek are (is) six days, many people in the United States who wants (want) to
get ahead voluntarily work on Saturday or Sunday in addition to their five-day workweek.

In spite of the similarity, Japan and the United States apparently opposite cultures leads
(lead) to their differences. One stark difference between Japan and the United States involve
issues of group interaction. Whereas people in the United States pride themselves on
individualism, the Japanese value (value) collectivism. People in the United States admires
(admire) and rewards (reward) a person who rises above the crowd; in contrast, a Japanese
proverb says, “the nail that sticks up gets hammered down”. In this sense, members of a
group holds (hold) collective responsibility for the performance and actions of an individual in
Japan (IES, 2021).

Adapted from Oshima, A. & Hogue, A. (2006). Writing academic English (4th ed.). Pearson Education

Common Language Errors: Vocabulary

Activity 7
Below are the characteristics of vocabulary used in academic writing. Describe and provide
examples for each characteristic.

No. Characteristic Description

1 Formal  Use formal words
e.g. x Regrettably these days lots of people don’t
have jobs.
/ These days, a lot of people are unemployed.
 Avoid contractions
e.g. don’t, there’s, there’re, can’t
 Avoid phrasal verbs
 2 Objective  Unbiased
e.g. How women’s brains work are far more
amazing than men’s.
 Avoid idiomatic expressions
e.g. In a nutshell…

3 Impersonal  Avoid intense and emotional language

e.g. x Parents who smoke are obviously abusers of
their own children.
/ Secondhand smoke has some harmful effects on
children.
 Avoid personal pronouns
e.g. x Based on the findings, I believe the model is
valid.
/ The findings suggest that the model is valid.

Activity 8
The texts below contain inappropriate words/phrases for academic texts. Identify and
replace them with appropriate words/phrases.

Text 1
It is widely agreed that men and women think and act in different ways. In general women
turn out (appear) to have better memories, better social skills and are more competent at
multitasking. Men, in contrast, seem to focus better on single issues and have amazing
(superior) motor and spatial skills, although clearly many people are exceptions to these
patterns. These differences have been told (explained/stated) as behaviour adopted
thousands of years ago, when the men went hunting while the women stayed at home and
cared for their children. But another approach is to see the behaviour as a result of the way
our (human) brains act the part.

Adapted from Bailey, S. (2018). Academic writing: A handbook for international students (5th ed.).
Routledge.

Answer:
 Inappropriate words/phrases Corrections
Turn out Appear
Amazing Superior
Told Explained/stated
Our Human

Text 2
Recent research by Ragini Verma’s team at the University of Pennsylvania has used brain
scans to compare 428 men and 521 women. They tracked the pathways of water molecules
around the brain area and found fascinating (significant) differences. The top half of our (the
human) brain is called the cerebrum, and it’s divided into a left and a right half. The left
hemisphere is thought to be the home of logic and the right is the centre of intuition. Dr.
Verma found out (found) that with women most of the pathways of the water molecules went
between the two halves, while with men they stayed inside the hemispheres. She believes
that these results explain the gender differences in ability, such as women’s wonderful social
competence compared to men’s more intense focus on single issues.
Adapted from Bailey, S. (2018). Academic writing: A handbook for international students (5th ed.).
Routledge.

Answer:
Inappropriate words/phrases Corrections
Fascinating Significant
Our The human
It’s It is
Found out Found
Wonderful (remove wonderful)

Certain common words can cause confusion because they have similar but distinct spellings
and meanings.

Activity 9
The texts below contain vocabulary errors. Identify and replace them with the correct words.

Text 1
Conventional crops have higher levels of the toxic metal cadmium, and are four-times more
likely to content (contain) detectable pesticide residues. They (There) are general
recommendations to minimise the intake of pesticides and cadmium to avoid potential
negative affects (effects) on health.
Adapted from Baranski, Rempelos, Iversen & Leifert (2017). Effects of organic food consumption on
human health; the jury is still out. Food Nutrition Research, 61(1).

Answer:
Inappropriate words Corrections
Content Contain
They There
Affects Effects

Text 2
The Arctic fox is comparable in size to the domestic cat. It inhibits the so-called ‘kingdom of
the polar bear’; the area midway between Norway and the North Pole. This canine predator
adopts (adapt) to extreme whether (weather) conditions. During the winter months, it’s (its)
white coat is an ideal camouflage in these rough northern climates.
Adapted from https://englishforeveryone.org/PDFs/Advanced%20Paragraph%20Correction%204.pdf

Answer:
Inappropriate words Corrections
Adopt Adapt
Whether Weather
It’s Its

Text 3
In many African countries, mobile phone ownership is aiding new businesses to get started.
Farmers can easily find current market prizes (prices) for their crops, and traders can use
mobile money services to make payments. It seems clear that as more people use these
phones, national GDP raises (rises). There is nearly one billion mobile phone users in Africa.
However, this number is deceptive as in reality only half of Africa’s 1.2 billion population
have excess (access) to a mobile phone because many of them have two or more mobile
phones.
Adapted from Bailey, S. (2018). Academic writing: A handbook for international students (5th ed.).
Routledge.
Answer:
Inappropriate words Corrections
Prizes Prices
Raises Rises
Excess Access

Common Language Errors: Spelling

Activity 10
The texts below contain common spelling errors in English. Identify the errors and write the
correct words.

Text 1
High school and college employ different teaching styles. In high school, teachers deliver
lessons by using textbooks and notes on a chalkboard. Students ask questions during
lectures and take notes of the lessons. Most of the time, the lecture follows the textbook. In
contrast, when it comes to teaching styles generally practised in a college, while books
supplement learning, lectures are full of interactive materials, illustrations, personal
experience and the professors’ own expertise in the subject. Rather than giving all the
information, college professors aspect (expect) students to find it on their own through
research assignments and homework.

Adapted from Your Dictionary (n.d.). Compare and contrast essay example: High school vs. college.
https://assets.ltkcontent.com/files/compare-contrast-essay-college.pdf

Answer:
Spelling errors Correction
Differet Different
Lesons Lessons
Generaly Generally
Suppllement Supplement
Expertice (use c when noun) Expertise (use s when verb)
Collage College
Aspect Expect
Asignments Assigments
Text 2
When it comes to comunication (communication) between people, the older generation used
to face many problems in contacting their deer (dear) ones; whereas, people of present
generation are used to conecting (connecting) with each other almost immediatly
(immediately). For exampel (example), teenagers in the new generation are used to spend
most of their time chatting with their friends on their mobile phones or chatting online. On the
other hand, people from older generation are acustomed (accustomed) to writing latters
(letters) to contact friends that are far away. They also would prefer face-to-face
comunication (communication) over virtual meetings when dealing with other people.

Adapted from GradeFixer (2019). The difference between generation. https://gradesfixer.com/free-

essay-examples/the-difference-between-generations/

Answer:
Spelling errors Correction
Comunication Communication
Deer Dear
Conesting Connecting
Immediatly Immediately
Exampel Example
Acustomed Accustomed
Latters Letters
Comunication Communication

Text 3
The most commonly cited advantege (advantage) of distance learning is the flexibility and
accesibility (accessibility) it offers.  Rather than being required to travel to a specific location
every week, students can participate from anywhere with an Internet connection, and this
allows for a wider geographical spread of students.  However, distance learning presents its
own accessibility (accessibility) challenges; not all students have a stabel (stable) internet
connection and a computer or other devise (device) with which to participate in online
classes, and less technologically litterate (literate) students and teachers may strugle
(struggle) with the technical expects (aspects) of class participation. Furthermore, discomfort
and distractions can hinder an individual student’s abillity (ability) to engage with the class
from home, creating divergent learning experiences for different students.  Distance learning,
then, seems to improve accesibility (accessibility) in some ways while representing a step
backwards in others.

Adapted from Bailey, S. (2018). Academic writing: A handbook for international students (5th ed.).
Routledge.

Answer:
Spelling errors Correction
Advantege Advantage
Accesibility Accessibility
Accesibility Accessibility
Stabel Stable
Devise Device
Litterate Literate
Strugle Struggle
Expects Aspects
Abillity Ability
Accesibility Accessibility