2 BOYS

"CALL FOR HELP"

(GIL enters and goes up to RALPH. GIL is grabbing his chest and looks very sick... like a heart
attack.  RALPH sees GIL and jumps up)

RALPH
Are you okay?

GIL
Fine, fine.  I need some insurance... now.

RALPH
You don't look so good. I better call…

GIL
No!  No... I'm fine. I need some of your life insurance... now.

RALPH
Um... well... if you're sure you don't need any help.

GIL
No... please... insurance... now.

RALPH
Oh... okay.  I remember you were looking at several policies last time you came by...

GIL
The one for heart attacks...

RALPH
With the mega care add on?

GIL
Right... mega... add…

(GIL is fading and slipping out of his chair)

RALPH
I really should call someone.

(GIL pulls himself back up)

RALPH
Well, there are several options…

GIL
Give me the best…

RALPH
That will require some underwriting... we'll have to fill out this paperwork…

GIL
Never mind... what's the quickest option?

RALPH
Level 1 and 2 are simple... no underwriting.

GIL
Give me those.

RALPH
You just need one.

GIL
Give me the better one... now... please…

RALPH
Well, I have a lot of your information on file... just sign here and we'll get this processed for you.

(GIL struggles to sign and finally manages with some help from RALPH)

GIL
We good?

RALPH
I'll just need a payment... you can do a credit card or here is a form for payroll deduction…

GIL
Credit card…

(GIL struggles to get wallet and gets card with Ralph's help)

RALPH
I'll run this now for you.
 GIL
Now... yes, please…

RALPH
And there we go.  Looks like you're good to go.

GIL
So I'm covered…

RALPH
Yes.

GIL
For say... a heart attack.

RALPH
Yes.

GIL
Good.

(GIL falls on the floor)

GIL (CONT.)
You can call for help now.

(GIL passes out and RALPH gets on his phone)

END OF SCENE

GIRL AND BOY

Mike: Oh hi.

Becky: Yeah, so let me show you around this dump. (sighs) I don’t know why they keep asking

me to do this but here we go, another tour. Yay. Follow me. (they begin walking through the

building) Oh yeah. Make sure you don’t sit in front of Linda. Sit behind Linda because she likes

to fire launch.
Mike: What do you mean?

Beck: Yeah, she’s a pick and roll type.

Mike: Pick and roll?

Becky: Yeah, she ah, (whispers) she digs deep, you know, pick, lick, stick and flick. You

follow? (she gestures to her nose)

Mike: (dawns on Mike) Oh! She, she–

Becky: You got it honey. So sit behind her to avoid taking shots to the head on launch days.

Mike: That’s terrible.

Becky: You gotta see it to believe it honey.

(they walk)

Alright, so, don’t use this men’s bathroom, even though it’s closer. We have Greg doing all kinds

of stuff in there. You meet Greg?

Mike: Greg? No.

Becky: Management must really like you then.

Mike: I don’t follow.

Becky: Greggie is offie. All the men just simply decided to just let him have his own bathroom.

All the guys use the one downstairs.

Becky: Speaking of which, let’s take the stairs. I’m not into elevators. Got caught in an elevator

once for four hours with a dead guy.

Mike: Dead guy?

Becky: Friggin’ heart attack.

Mike: While being stuck in an elevator?

2 GIRLS

Mother: When you gonna stop all that nonsense and get yourself on a path to success?

Kelly: What are you talking about?

(gesturing to her daughter’s notebooks)

Mother: This.  All this stuff.  Where is it going?

Kelly: I don’t know.

Mother: You’re old enough to get a job and start helping us.  You’re father’s been out of work

now for two months and not once have you offered to help out.  Even a part time job, something

to be part of this family, instead of locking yourself up in this room dabbling or doodling or

whatever it is that you do.

Kelly: Writing, Ma.

hitting the boulevard and finding some sort of work.  Get a job. You’ve lived stress free for

sixteen years.  I’ve had it.

Kelly: I’ll see about getting something at the sandwich shop.  Frida has a job there, maybe she

can get me something a couple days a week.

Mother: Good.  That’s reality, child.  Living in your room—

Kelly: I said I’ll get a job, alright? Don’t have a go at me.

Mother: I will have a go at you anytime I desire.

Kelly: I don’t want to hear it.  I’m in the middle of something and I already said I’ll go out

tomorrow to find a job.  What more do you want from my life?

Mother: I want you to think!  I want you to look ahead.  Stop being so self-absorbed and wasting

your time.  I don’t see no hunger, no ambition in you.  I don’t see you going out and doing

anything with your life.

Kelly: I am!  What do you think I’m doing by writing?

Mother: Do you even know how to make any money from it?

Kelly: No.

Mother: So why bother?

Kelly: Cause it’s what I like doing.  Why can’t I do stuff I like doing?
Mother: I liked dancing when I was your age.  Didn’t mean I was going to be a ballerina!

Kelly: Leave me alone.

Mother: I’ve read your stuff, by the way.

Kelly: You what?

Mother: Your so-called writing.  I’ve read it.  I didn’t like it.  You’re much better off going to

school and working your way up to something.  Too much of this writing—

Kelly: How can you do that to me, when I’ve already told you to stay out of my stuff!

Mother: Don’t you dare take that tone with me.

Kelly: Don’t read my stuff!  It isn’t for you.

GENDER NEUTRAL
INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY

Charlie stands in the living room admiring a tall grandfather clock, or at least trying to admire
it. Dakota enters sorting through the mail.

DAKOTA Hey, Charlie.

CHARLIE Hey.

Dakota walks by Charlie and doesn’t see the clock at first, then suddenly stops and turns to look.

DAKOTA Is that a grandfather clock?

CHARLIE Actually, it’s a grandfather Cuckoo clock. It has a real Cuckoo bird that pops out
and chirps on the hour.
DAKOTA Charlie, you were at the flea market again, weren’t you?

CHARLIE No. (off Dakota’s stare) Okay, yes. I was at the flea market. But I got this for a
steal.

DAKOTA Charlie, you’ve got to stop going to the flea market.

CHARLIE Why? The house is fully furnished, and for a fraction of what it would have cost if
we had bought everything new.

DAKOTA I have no problem with all the little things we need, like kitchen utensils, hanging
plants, or a few coffee mugs, but... I never wanted all this junk in here.

CHARLIE Junk? Everything at the flea market is of quality merchandise, where you can find
anything and everything under the sun.

DAKOTA Oh dear god, you just quoted their ad slogan.

CHARLIE No I didn’t...

DAKOTA I think you have a problem. (beat) Charlie, you are a flea market junkie. And if
you don’t stop going there, you’re going to lose a roommate, and maybe even a
friend.

CHARLIE I’m sorry, Dakota. I was just trying to save us money, that’s all.

DAKOTA I know, but I’d rather everything in the house matched and... actually worked.

Suddenly, the cuckoo clock bird pops out and makes a horrendous sound, startling both of them.

DAKOTA Okay... that has to go.

CHARLIE Oh come on, I’m sure I can fix it. Please let me keep the cuckoo clock. THEN...
the cuckoo clock bird appears again and the sound seems to be worse.
(CHARLIE off Dakota’s stare) Okay. I’ll have it out tomorrow.