IELTS Cause Solution Essay Band 9 Model Answer
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IELTS Cause Solution Essay Band 9 Model Answer
December 25, 2014 by Liz 146 Comments
The model answer below is for an IELTS cause and solution essay in writing task 2 on the topic of crime
and punishment.
Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this
happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?
A large number of criminals who serve their first prison sentence, leave prison only to reoffend. This is
mainly because of the lack of rehabilitation and difficulty finding regular employment once released.
There are a number of solutions which should be implemented to deal with criminals who reoffend.
Firstly, the reason for most first-time offenders committing crimes again, once they have been released
from prison, is due to the lack of rehabilitation whilst in prison. In other words, offenders are not given a
chance to retrain and learn new skills for their future or develop a deeper understanding of correct moral
behaviour and instead mix with other criminals, which only strengthens their criminal intentions.
Secondly, repeat offending is also owing to the difficulty in finding employment after being released. As
a result, many of them struggle financially which leads them back to crime, regardless of the
consequences.
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IELTS Cause Solution Essay Band 9 Model Answer
There are two effective solutions to the problem of repeat offenders. One way to tackle this is to ensure
that all criminals entering prison are given the chance to retrain with useful skills which will hopefully
ensure them a job after they have served their sentence. By doing this, it will help them reintegrate back
into society and give them some means of supporting themselves financially. Another method of dealing
with criminals who reoffend is to have more supervision and checks in place when they are back in
society. This solution would hopefully prevent them from taking any chances and deter them from
reoffending because they are being so closely watched.
In conclusion, having training in prison and also close observation when first time offenders are released
are effective in dealing with the issue. If governments implemented these solutions, crime figures would
soon drop.
Comments
This essay address the task completely. Both causes and solutions are given and developed
with relevant ideas. Linking is used not only effectively but also flexibly. Paragraphing is also
used effectively to help the reader. There is a range of sentence structures and also tenses
used. Vocabulary is also flexible with a good range of less common words. Essay Length: 290
words
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