Sofomore Bahirdar-1
Sofomore Bahirdar-1
Sofomore Bahirdar-1
BY
Tesfaye Tilahun
&
Ayalew Mulgeta
Bahir Dar
January 2006
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
Subject is a part of a sentence about which a statement is made. It is a noun or pronoun, with
any of its modifiers.
Predicate is the statement made about the subject .It is a verb or verb phrase, with any modifiers
or words used to complete its meaning.
Example
Our soccer team won the state championship.
Our soccer team / won the state championship.
Subject Predicate
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
Example:
- John fights.
- They run
In sentence 1, John the actor is, a simple subject, and fights, the action, is a simple predicate.
In sentence 2, the simple subject is they, the actor, and the simple predicate is run, the act.
Simple subject (actor) Simple predicate(act)
Flowers bloom.
Novels teach.
Men laugh.
Candles burn.
Honesty pays.
In the sentences given above, the subject (actor) has consisted of a single word: flowers, novels,
men, candles, honesty. Such subjects are called simple subjects. The predicate (act) has also
consisted of a single word: bloom, teach, laugh, burn, pays. Such predicates are called simple
predicates.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
2. Complete Predicate
In the same way, when the predicate consists of a single word or a verb phrase, it is called a simple predicate. When
it is expanded by the addition of other words, then the simple predicate plus its modifiers, plus any other words that
completes its meaning, are called complete predicate.
1. Compound Subject
A subject can be made up of two or more nouns or pronouns. In this case the sentence has a compound subject.
Example
- Gemechu and Chaltu saved $ 500 a year with grocery coupons.
- A right attitude and a winning personality /should be your best principles to get a job.
- The movement of the tropical fish and the bubbles from the filter/ fascinate the young cat.
2. Compound Predicate
A sentence can have two or more verbs for the same subject. In this case the sentence is said to
have a compound predicate.
Example
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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- We chopped the celery, diced the carrots, and sliced the onions.
- The snow fell throughout the night and blanketed the area.
- You should leave at six o’clock and arrive by midnight.
Example
- The players arrived.
- The players and the judges arrived.
- The players arrived and reported.
- The players and the judges arrived and reported.
- I have never played tennis.
- The big oak tree in front of our house is a permanent house for thousands of birds.
N.B. Don’t be confused by the length of a sentence. You should simply count the number
of clauses in the sentence.
- I have never played tennis, but I hope to start taking lessons next year.
- I steamed the carrots, then I baked the potatoes.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
3. Complex Sentence is a sentence, which consists of one main clause and one or more
subordinate clauses.
Example
- Although I have never played tennis, I planned to start taking lessons next year.
The subordinate clause modifies a word (a noun/ a verb/ the whole main clause) in the sentence,
and it can be either adjectival or adverbial.
Example
- He met a student who left school last year. (adjective clause)
- After I took a nap, I felt better. (adverb clause)
- If you come late, you will miss the bus.(adverb clause).
- The girl whom I told you about yesterday when we were at the café is a lawyer.
4. Compound -Complex Sentence is a sentence which consists of two independent clauses with
one or more subordinate clauses.
Example
- Although I have never played tennis, I planned to start taking lessons next year; I really
need the aerobic exercise that tennis provides.
- Although I have never played tennis, I really need the exercise, so I planned to start
taking lessons next year.
- I bought coca cola, and I drank it at once because I was very thirsty.
5.Complex-complex sentences
A complex-complex sentence has one or more independent clauses and one or more
dependent clauses, one of which depend on the other. In other words, one of the dependent
clauses depend on the other dependent clause.
Example:
I like students who work hard when they are told.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
You can see that this sentence has two dependent clauses:
who work hard, and
When they are told.
You can also see that the dependent clause “ when they are told” is dependent on the
preceding dependent clause, not on the independent( main) clause. Look also the
following examples.
Nelson Mandela, who had fought against apartheid for a long time because he wanted to
make his people free, has gained immense respect from the whole world.
Because my child likes toys which can talk, I have sent inquiries to the nearby factory
for such toys.
Come on time; otherwise, you will miss the Sophomore English class whose teacher is
very angry at late comers.
EXERCISE
Read the following sentences and identify whether each of them is simple, compound, complex,
compound-complex, or complex-complex.. Then write the answer on the space provided.
________1.Bekele dislikes sitting on the beach; he always gets a nasty sunburn.
________2.Although they are 250 miles apart, they keep in constant
contact on the internet.
________3.Those students who live in the area often find the local college
boring, but students from out of the area seem to like it.
________4.After a lengthy and noisy debate, they decided to take
separate vacations
_______5.Ronaldiniho dribbled past two defenders and made a good
shot, but the goalkeeper easily saved.
_______6.A gentle man of wealth and position has been found guilty of theft
_________7.The life which seems so fair is like a bubble blown in the air
________8.There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it bad
________9.Those who seek faultless friends remain friendless.
________10.Reading a novel after work is a pleasant way of spending leisure
_______ 11.If you really want me to help you wash your floors, please
give me a week’s notice for I am busy this month.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
________12.The people of Bahir Dar are throwing garbage anywhere in the city; consequently, the
air is polluted.
REFERENCES
Rorabacher, Louise E. (1963) A Concise Guide to Composition, Second Edition , New York.
Needleman , Morris H. (1968) Handbook for Practical Composition, McGraw-Hill Book Company, New York.
Schiffhorst , Gerald j. (1997) The Short Hand Book for Writers ,McGraw-hill book
Tyner ,Thomas E. (1987)College Writing Basics, Wads Worth Publishing Company,
California.
Clouse ,Barbara Fine (1996) Jump Start, A Work Book for Writers, McGraw-Hill Book Company, U.S.A.
Leggett , Mead , and Charvat (1978)Prentice-Hall Handbook for Writers( Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey ,
Seventh Edition.
Encarta encyclopedia (2005) Microsoft® Encarta® Premium Suite 2005. © 1993-2004 Microsoft Corporation.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
2. Sentence Combination
2.1.Coordination
2.2.Subordination
A paper containing sentences of one short pattern bores both the writer and the reader for two
reasons:
1. Repetition of a single, simple sentence pattern draws attention to itself, not to the ideas in
the paper.
2. Simple, short sentences cannot show the reader the many relationships that exist among
ideas of different importance.
If you read through a paper you've written and notice that you've written sentences in a single,
short pattern, ask yourself the following questions. Your answers can help you revise the
sentences to express your ideas more clearly and to add variety to your paper.
Do adjacent sentences contain the same subject and/or the same verb?
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
If so, you can combine two or more short, simple sentences in a single, concise sentence
by:
For example:
Joining the sentences by omitting repeated subjects and verbs and by using adjectives.
Joining the sentences by omitting repeated subjects and verbs and by using adverbs.
If so, you can use either subordination or coordination to join the sentences with a
coordinating conjunction preceded by a comma. The coordinating conjunctions(which we
are going to discuss in detail later) create different relationships between two ideas.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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In other words, in writing, you are required to keep the interest of your reader. One of the mechanisms to do this is
that you have to vary the length of your sentences. To vary the length of your sentences, you should combine two or
more short sentences in to one. Two or more ideas can be connected in a sentence by two means: coordination and
subordination.
2.1.Coordination is a method of joining two independent sentences by using coordinators. In
coordination, the status of the sentences is not reduced when they are combined. In other
words, when they are combined, they still remain independent clauses.
The linking devices (coordinators) we use in coordination are:
2.1.1 Coordinating Conjunctions
2.1.2 Correlative Conjunctions
2.1.3 Adverb Conjunctions
PATTERN DISCOVERY
Instructions: Examine these sentences, especially the italicized parts, then answer the
questions below. What patterns can you discover? Don't do anything to
the sentences, but do answer the questions below about these sentences.
Harriet earned an A in the class, for she studied carefully.
We went to the movies, and we ate popcorn.
He didconjunction
A coordinating not study foristhe exam,
a word nor
that didgrammatically
joins he pass. equivalent structures. You
Collecting
can join glassoffigurines
a pair or series is a delightful
nouns, verbs, hobby, clauses.
or independent but it can be expensive.
Each element of the pair
Fred
or series mustwanted
have the
to same grammatical
go skiing, structure.
or he wanted to goThis section will cover coordinating
snowboarding.
conjunctions that join
He knew the independent clauses
cost, yet he did .To indicate to the reader that two ideas are equally
it anyway.
important,
Hewe use one
knew it would not cost him, so he did it.
of the1.coordinating
What is theconjunctions to join
function of the two independent
italicized part? (Whatclauses.
is it doing in the sentence?)
Seven common coordinating conjunctions and their meanings are listed below. Each of
2. Where is the italicized portion located? Does the location differ form sentence
the coordinating conjunctions has a different meaning ,so the student should make sure
to sentence?
that he/she uses the appropriate one.
3. How is the italicized portion punctuated? Does this differ from sentence to
sentence?
11 4. What is the apparent meaning of each italicized word?
BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
Coordinating Conjunctions
The most commonly used coordinating conjunctions which are used in writing are the following.
For - a more formal word for because, this shows a result- cause relationship
between two independent clauses. It shows logical consequence; it has the same
meaning as because, the reason why
And - shows equality between the two ideas. It shows addition; it has the same meaning as
in addition, along with
Nor - shows equality of two negative ideas. It shows an addition of a negative point
( Note: you must reverse the normal subject- verb positions in the second clause when
using nor).
But - shows opposition or contrast between two ideas. It has the same meaning as however,
except, on the other hand
So - shows cause and effect relationship. It has the same meaning as therefore, as a result. X
happened, so Y happened.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
Note: When you use the above coordinating conjunctions to join complete sentences, use a comma before the
coordinators.
Example:
Azeb studied hard, so she scored a good grade.
You must be early, or you will miss the bus.
The driver couldn’t control the speed of the car, for he was totally drunk.
The patient didn’t his dinner, nor did he eat his lunch.
Haile is running very fast; he seems to win the race.
She studied hard, but she failed the examination.
Yesterday, I saw movie, and I visited my friends.
EXERCISE 1
INSTRUCTIONS: In the space provided, write an appropriate coordinating conjunction. Be
sure to punctuate properly.
Example: Employees should be pleasant to customers, so they should do
whatever is needed to help.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Exercise 2
Combine the following pairs of sentences by using coordinating conjunctions.
1A. The dog ate the food very fast
B. It was very hungry
2.A. The boy sang very well at the Ethiopian Idols.
B. The judges didn’t allow him to pass to the next stage.
3.A. She didn’t bring her exercise book.
B. She didn’t bring her pen.
4.A. The farmer worked all day and night.
B. He harvested a lot of crops.
Either/or
Either go to bed early this evening or stop complaining about being tired in class.
Both words make up the correlative conjunction. Alone EITHER is an indefinite pronoun
and OR is a coordinating conjunction.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Neither/nor
Neither the contestant nor his sponsor was willing to attend the lecture.
Both words make up the correlative conjunction. Alone NEITHER is an adjective and
NOR is a coordinating conjunction.
The newspaper reported that not only the hurricane but also the ensuing floods caused
millions of dollars worth of damage.
Whether/or
Does anyone know whether the president or the vice president was responsible for
providing the announcement to the press?
Remember that when either and neither are used without or and/or nor they act as adjectives or
pronouns.
In general, a conjunction is a word that is used to link, or put together, other words.
Conjunctions can link words, phrases, and clauses.
Correlative conjunctions are pairs of words that are used to link words together. The most
important thing to remember when using correlative conjunctions is that the words, phrases, or
clauses that are put together must be the same type. That means that nouns must be put together
with other nouns, verbs with other verbs, adjectives with other adjectives, and so on. This point
will be more fully explained following the list of frequently used correlative conjunctions.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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The followings are again more examples of how correlative conjunctions are used. See hoh they
are used properly and how they are used improperly:
A. Properly
He did not know whether to exit the freeway at Orange Avenue or to exit the freeway at
Cherry Avenue.
The correlative conjunction in this sentence is "whether ... or." This conjunction links
two phrases.
The ESL teachers are not only intelligent but also friendly.
The correlative conjunction in this sentence is "not only ... but also." This conjunction
links two phrases.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
B. Improperly:
This is not correct because friendly is an adjective and baker is a noun. A correlative
conjunction must link similar types of words.
The athlete did not know whether to run or walking in order to warm up.
This is not correct because, even though both are verbs, "to run" is the infinitive form and
"walking" is the present participle. A correlative conjunction must link similar types of
words.
We will see more examples of such faulty sentences when we discuss about parallelism
Correlative conjunctions consist of two parts, both of which must be included in the sentence.
Some common correlative conjunctions are both. . . and, either. . . or, neither. . . nor, not
only. . . but, and whether. . . or. Like coordinating conjunctions, these conjunctions may link
words, phrases, or clauses. The units being joined by a correlative conjunction must be parallel in
grammatical structure and importance.
Exercises
Exercise 1.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHMORE ENGLISH UNIT 2: SENTENCE COMBINATION
Choose the correct correlative conjunction to complete the following blank spaces.
1. When they found the man who had been lost for four days, he was ______________ tired
______________ hungry
A. not only .... but also
B. either ... or
C. neither ... nor
D. as ... as
2. He is neither my uncle ___ my cousin
A. and B. or C. but D. nor
Exercise
Fill in the blanks in the following sentences by using the appropriate correlative conjunction.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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10. If she has enough time, she will go to……Las Vegas…..the Grand Canyon.
11. She will spend less money if she goes to the Grand Canyon. The Grand Canyon is
not………expensive……….Las Vegas.
12. This is the last question. You are now finished with............this quiz …..this
lesson.
A conjunction is a word that links words, phrases, or clauses. There are three types of
conjunctions: coordinating conjunctions, correlative conjunctions, and subordinating
conjunctions. Coordinating conjunctions may join single words, or they may join groups of
words, but they must always join similar elements: e.g. subject + subject, verb phrase + verb
phrase, sentence + sentence. When a coordinating conjunction is used to join elements, the
element becomes a compound element. Correlative conjunctions also connect sentence elements
of the same kind: however, unlike coordinating conjunctions, correlative conjunctions are always
used in pairs. Subordinating conjunctions, the largest class of conjunctions, connect subordinate
clauses to a main clause. These conjunctions are adverbs used as conjunctions.
Exercise 3:
Combine the following pairs of sentences by using correlative conjunctions
1.A.To go to Gondar, You can use a bus.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Conjunctive adverbs, unlike coordinating and subordinating conjunctions, are the only ones that can be moved from
the beginning of a clause to another position in the clause without changing the clause’s meaning. In other words,
they occupy different positions within the main clause in which they stand.
Example
- The band struck up a familiar tune; indeed, they were playing our song.
- The band struck up a familiar tune; they were, indeed, playing our song.
Note:
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Most adverb conjunctions are preceded by a semi colon and followed by a comma. There are
some exceptions, however. Adverb conjunctions like still and also are, for example, not
preceded by a semicolon.
Example
● Sorry I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off. Also, I had trouble starting the car.
● He has treated you badly: still, he is your brother.
Some other adverb conjunctions like otherwise and then are preceded by a semi colon but not
followed by a comma.
Example
● John must be sick; otherwise he would be here.
● She made coffee; then she cooked breakfast.
To maintain the desired relationship between independent clauses, see the following chart
to know the meaning of coordinating and adverb conjunctions.
EXERCISES
Exercise 1
In the space provided, use the appropriate conjunctive adverbs. Be sure to punctuate it
properly.
however therefore consequently especially in addition
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Exercise 2
Combine the following pairs of sentences by using the appropriate conjunctive adverb.
1.A.He won the lottery.
B. His father gave him a lot of money.
_______________________________________________________________________
2.A. He worked hard.
B. He became rich.
______________________________________________________________________
3.A.Abebe’s parents are wealthy.
B. They are not happy.
____________________________________________________________________
4.A.We need Ato Bekele at the next monthly meeting.
B.We have changed the date of the meeting.
____________________________________________________________________
5. A.Bahir Dar is growing fast.
B.Debremarkos is growing slowly.
____________________________________________________________________
2.2 Subordination
Subordination is the joining of an independent clause and a dependent clause in the same sentence by using
subordinators. In subordination, the status of one of the sentences to be combined is reduced in to a subordinate
(dependent) one. As you might recall from the above discussion, in coordination the status of the sentences to be
combined is not reduced; they remain independent.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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PATTERN DISCOVERY
Instructions: Examine these sentences, especially the italicized parts, then answer the
questions below.
Even though polar bears look like land animals, they are extremely adept in the water.
Pups also love the snow because they like to slide down inclines.
They love to roll around in the snow if a good snowstorm hits.
If they can punch through the ice sheet, polar bears love swimming most.
Rachel was reading fiction while her brother was listening music.
1. What is the function of the italicized part? (What is it doing in the sentence?)
2. Where is the italicized portion located? Does the location differ from sentence to
sentence?
3. How is the italicized portion punctuated? Does this differ from sentence to sentence?
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Example
Because the train was late, I arrived late to work.
contrast/concession although, as though, even though, though, even if, where as, while,
condition even if, if, as if, as long as, provided that, unless,
provided
result that, so that, in order that
time after, until, as soon as, before, since, when, while, once,
whenever, after
place where, wherever
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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EXERCISE
INSTRUCTION: Join the following sentences using the most appropriate subordinating
conjunctions. Rewrite the sentences in the spaces provided, revising the
sentences as necessary.
if before
while because
although in order that
5. Lions spend most of their time sleeping and resting. Most people picture lions
constantly stalking prey.
____________________________________________________________________
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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____________________________________________________________________
6. The expert spoke to the farmers slowly and simply. Every farmer could
understand what he was saying.
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
8. Melina reaches home quickly. She will tell her father about the
accident.,l____________________________________________________________________
PATTERN DISCOVERY
INSTRUCTIONS: Examine these sentences, especially the italicized parts, then answer
the questions below.
The boat that was owned by Mr. Mitchell sank in the harbor.
The Crescent Moon, which was Mr. Mitchell's boat, was brand new.
Mr. Mitchell, who was a stockbroker, liked the status a boat afforded.
His guests, whom Mr. Mitchell chose with little care, partied on the boat to all
hours.
One guest, whose criminal record was unknown to Mr. Mitchell, stole the boat,
then sank it when the police got too close.
1. What is the function of the italicized part? (What is it doing in the sentence?
Why is it there?)
2. Where is the italicized portion located? Does the location differ from sentence
to sentence?
3. How is the italicized portion punctuated? Does this differ from sentence to
sentence?
4. What are the words that begin each italicized portion?
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Like the other subordinating conjunctions relative pronouns are used to join subordinate clauses
with independent sentences. They also introduce relative clauses.
Example
-The boat that was owned by Mr. Mitchell sank in the harbor.
(The italicized part is a subordinate clause.)
What makes the subordinate clause in relative clauses different from the other type of
subordinate clauses is, the subordinate clause in a relative clause is an adjective clause .
In relative clauses, the adjective clauses which are dependent clauses that modify a noun or a
pronoun in the main clause, usually begin with relative pronoun: who, whom , whose, which, or
that.
Note:
In relative clauses:
- The adjective clauses answer the question which one? Or what kind of?
- Adjective clauses are always placed after the noun or the pronoun they modify.
- The relative pronoun that introduces an adjective clause can function as a
subject, as an object, or as a possessive marker.
Relative Pronoun Use
who, which Subjective case
Note: The relative pronoun “that” can be used in place of who, which or whom, but not in place
of whose.
Restrictive and non restrictive adjective clauses
Adjective clauses may be restrictive (also called essential) or non restrictive (non essential).
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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- A restrictive adjective clause is necessary to make the meaning of the sentence complete. For
example, in the sentence The movie that I saw yesterday won a Grammy Award , the information
in the adjective clause that I saw yesterday is essential to the meaning of the sentence. Without
it, it is difficult to the reader to identify which special movie the writer is discussing about.
- A non restrictive adjective clause merely adds information to a sentence the full meaning of
which is already clear.
Example
New York, which is America’s populous city, is one of the world's leading commercial, financial, and
cultural centers.
Note: You can see in this example that the noun ‘ New York’ is defined by itself. So, the relative clause does not
define it. In other words, it is non-defining or non-restrictive. A non restrictive adjective clause is separated from the
main clause by commas.
EXERCISE
INSTRUCTION: Join the following sentences using the most appropriate relative pronouns.
Rewrite the sentences in the space provided, revising
the sentences as necessary.
1. The woman has been arrested. Her child was accused of theft.
____________________________________________________________
2. The police were looking for the thief. The thief has been caught.
_____________________________________________________________
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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REFERENCES
Ploeger , Katherine (2000) Simplified Paragraph Skills. NTC / Contemporary Publishing Group. U S A
Wiener, Harvey S. (1984) Creating Composition, Fourth Edition , McGraw-Hill Book Company.
Leggett, Mead, and Charvat (1978) Prentice-Hall Handbook for Writers (Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey, Seventh
Edition.
Schiffhorst , Gerald j. (1997) The Short Hand Book for Writers ,McGraw-hill book
Tyner, Thomas E. (1987) College Writing Basics, Wads Worth Publishing Company,
California.
Clouse, Barbara Fine (1996) Jump Start, A Work Book for Writers, McGraw-Hill Book Company, U.S.A.
Unit Three: Characteristics of Effective Sentences
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Example
AMBIGUOUS Arthur went with John to the airport, where he took a plane to Phoenix.
[Who took the plane to Phoenix, Arthur or John?]
CLEAR After going to the airport with John, Arthur took the plane to Phoenix.
After Arthur went to the airport with him, John took the plane to Phoenix.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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1. What is the function of the italicized part? (What is it doing in the sentence?
Why is it there?)
2. Where is the italicized portion located? Does the location change?
3. How is the italicized portion punctuated? Does this change?
4. Look at the subject of the independent clause. Compare that to the implied
subject of the italicized portion. How are they related?
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
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Verbal phrase
Verbal phrase are phrases that start with a verbal. Verbals come in three forms: Participles, Gerunds, and Infinitives.
We will focus, however, on the verbal phrase (participles) that is needed for this topic.
Participles function as noun modifiers. They have three forms: present, past, and perfect.
- The present participle ends in –ing (dancing, waiting).
- The past participle usually ends in –ed (danced, waited).
- The perfect participle is formed by the past participle preceded by having (having danced, having waited).
A participial phrase contains a participle and any complements and modifiers it may have. The
entire phrase functions as an adjective, modifying a noun or pronoun:
- Coming in for a landing, the plane skidded off the way.
- Built in the 1700s, the church was a historic place.
- Having finished the cake, James started on the cookies.
When we come to a dangling modifier, it occurs when the implied subject of a verbal phrase is
not the same as the subject of the independent clause. Who or what is doing the action in the
verbal phrase must be named as the subject in the independent clause. When these two subjects
are not the same, you have created a dangling modifier. It is obvious that a modifier must have
something to modify, but a dangling modifier has nothing to modify because the word it
logically should modify is not present in its sentence. A modifier that opens a sentence must be
followed immediately by the word it is meant to describe. Otherwise, the modifier is said to be
dangling, and the sentence takes on an unintended meaning. For example:
Driving through the mountains, three bears were seen.
Driving through the mountains is a participial phrase that can modify anything capable of
driving. The sentence says that the bears are driving, but common sense tells us bears can’t drive.
Although the writer surely meant that the bears were seen by some person who was driving, the
sentence contains no words directly identifying such a person.
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EXERCISE
INSTRUCTION: The following sentences have problems. Revise them as necessary. You
may have to change a word or two to make the sentence meaningful. Rewrite the
sentence on the line provided.
1. Blowing at 100 miles per hour, the roof was ripped off.
__________________________________________________________
2. Shaving in front of the steamy mirror, the razor nicked Edward's chin.
__________________________________________________________
5. Munching leaves from a tall tree, the children were fascinated by the giraffe.
_________________________________________________________________
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_____________________________________________________________
4. Misplaced modifiers
Modern English relies heavily upon word order to show relationships among words for word order is crucial to
meaning in English. Just as word order is the principal way to keep subject–verb–object relations clear, so it is the
principal way to keep many modifiers attached to the words they modify. Phrases and clauses that modify nouns
require special care, since they normally attach to the nearest noun preceding them.
Misplaced modifiers are words that, because of awkward placement, do not describe what the writer intended them
to describe. Misplaced modifiers often confuse the meaning of a sentence. To avoid them, place words as close as
possible to what they describe.
Example:
Error: Frozen shrimp lay in the steel pans that were melting rapidly.
(The italicized clause is a misplaced modifier.)
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Revised: Frozen shrimp that were melting rapidly lay in the steel pans.
EXERCISE
INSTRUCTION: Underline the misplaced word or words in the following sentences. Rewrite the
sentences and place the misplaced modifiers next to the words they describe.
1. Mr. Yassir Arafat was born in Jerusalem who was the first president of Palestine.
________________________________________________________________
6. Alula was a former Ethiopian fighter the most famous man at the Dogali.
________________________________________________________________
7. The bank robber pointed his gun at the teller in the ski mask.
_______________________________________________________________
5. Errors in Punctuation
• Fragment
• Run-on
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PATTERN DISCOVERY
Instructions: Examine these sentences, especially the italicized parts, then answer the questions
below.
Even though the pizza was hot. He ate it quickly.
This was the painting. That was portrayed by Leonardo da Vinci.
Alula was a former Ethiopian fighter. The most famous man at the Dogali.
Traveling through six cities in one week. They lost their luggage.
As a result of this event. He had learned this lesson.
The dog ran fast it jumped over the barrel.
Caffeine is a stimulant it gives some people the courage.
Hanna got the highest grade she is my best friend.
He is the person the person gave me the letter.
1. What is the problem with each italicized part in the first five sentences?
What is the problem in the remaining four sentences? There are two errors.
a. …………………………………………………………………………
b. …………………………………………………………………………
2. How should each be corrected?
a. The error in the first five sentences can be corrected:
…………………………………………………………………………
…………………………………………………………………………
…………………………………………………………………………
b. The error in the remaining four sentences can be corrected:
…………………………………………………………………………
…………………………………………………………………………
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A. Fragments
A fragment is a piece of a sentence punctuated as if a complete, independent clause. Fragments
can create misunderstanding and distract your readers. A fragment is usually either a phrase or a
dependent clause. For Example,
The first five sentences in the Pattern Discovery box on pp. 24 are fragments, i. e,
- sentence one shows an adverb clause as a fragment.
- sentence two shows an adjective clause as a fragment
- sentence three shows a noun phrase appositive as a fragment
- sentence four shows a verbal phrase as a fragment
- sentence five shows an adverb clause as a fragment
Most of the time, the problems occur when the writer added a thought which is not complete. But
the most common fragments are caused when the writer punctuates as a sentence one of four
different constructions that cannot stand alone. These constructions are: adverb clause, adjective
clause, verbal phrase, and adverb phrase.
Most of the time, fragments are continuations of a sentence before. Sometimes, however, it
seems they attached well with the next sentence, so the student need to read the sentences and
decide which sentence the fragment belongs to.
To correct fragments, for example in the Pattern Discovery box above (pp. 24) (in all cases
except two and three) simply change the incorrect punctuation to a comma, and the capital letters
in the middle of the sentence also need to change to lower case letters.
See how the fragments are corrected.
Even though the pizza was hot. He ate it quickly.
Even though the pizza was hot, he ate it quickly.
Traveling through six cities in one week. They lost their luggage.
Traveling through six cities in one week, they lost their luggage.
As a result of this event. He had learned this lesson.
As a result of this event, he had learned this lesson.
This was the painting. That was portrayed by Leonardo da Vinci.
This was the painting that was portrayed by Leonardo da Vinci.
(Here, the comma is not necessary)
Alula was a former Ethiopian fighter. The most famous man at the Dogali.
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B. Run-ons
The term run-on sentence labels an error with several different names, the most common being
fused sentence and comma splice.
Fused sentence refers to the error of two independent clauses put together without any
separating punctuation or linking device between them.
Example
(The last four sentences in the Pattern Discovery box on pp. 24 are fused sentences)
The witness was unwilling to testify, he was afraid of the accused man.
I avoided deserts I was trying to loose weight.
Comma Splice refers to the error of two independent clauses punctuated as one sentence.
Placing a comma in between two main clauses without a coordinating conjunction (and, but, for,
or, nor, so, yet) results in the comma fault or comma splice.
Example
The witness was unwilling to testify, he was afraid of the accused man.
I avoided deserts, I was trying to loose weight.
Fused sentence and comma splice can be corrected in one of the following ways:
- Connect the main clauses with a coordinating conjunction and a comma.
- Replace the comma with a semicolon.
- Make a separate sentence of each main clause.
- Change one of the main clauses to a separate clause.
Example 1
Revised 1 The witness was unwilling to testify, for he was afraid of the accused man.
Revised 2 The witness was unwilling to testify; he was afraid of the accused man.
Revised 3 The witness was unwilling to testify. He was afraid of the accused man.
Revised 4 Because the witness was afraid of the accused man, he was unwilling to testify.
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Example 2
Revised 1 I avoided deserts, for I was trying to loose weight.
Revised 2 I avoided deserts; I was trying to loose weight.
Revised 3 I avoided deserts. I was trying to loose weight.
Revised 4 Because I was trying to loose weight, I avoided deserts
6. FAULTY PARALLELISM
The other error which affects the clarity of our sentences is faulty parallelism. But before we directly proceed to faulty
parallelism lets see what a parallelism is.
Parallelism is a basic principle of effective writing. Sentences that have coordinated clause phrases or words are
considered as having parallel structures (parallelism) when matching ideas are expressed in similar ways. Parallelism is
useful for constructing effective sentences, for combining successive sentences to achieve economy and clarity, and for
maintaining coherence through out an entire paragraph. When you coordinate two or more elements in a sentence, the
writer is expected to state them parallel, that is, to state them in the same grammatical form. Noun should be matched
with noun, verb with verb, phrase with phrase, and clause with clause. On the other hand, lack of parallelism can throw a
reader off and produce ineffective sentences.
FAULTY: This product is sturdy, light and costs very little.
PARALLEL: This product is sturdy, light and inexpensive.
FAULTY: Ms. Kramer told us to check the value of the property and that our insurance
should be increased
PARALLEL: Ms Kramer told us that we should check the value of the property and
that we should increase our insurance.
OR Ms. Kramer told us to check the value of the property and to increase our insurance.
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FAULTY: The man gave not only money, but also advised me.
(Not only is followed by a noun; but also is followed by a verb)
PARALLEL: The man gave me not only money, but also advice.
(The terms on both sides of the coordinating conjunctions match.)The man not only
gave me money but also advised me.
FAULTY: Our president not only visiting the casualties but also arranges immediate aid. PARALLEL:
Our president not only visits the casualties but also arranges immediate aid.
EXERCISE
INSTRUCTION: Revise the following sentences, rewording as necessary to express coordinate ideas in
parallel grammatical form.
1. My job includes checking the inventory, initialing the orders, and to call the
suppliers.
________________________________________________________________
2. Lola likes to ride her moped, to do needlepoint, and playing games on her personal
Computer.
_______________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
3. Chocolate makes me gain weight, lose my appetite, and breaking out in hives.
________________________________________________________________
4. Adam convinced most of the audience because he argued logically, calmly, and was
reasonable.
________________________________________________________________
5. Curling over grown vines, porch furniture that was rotted, and sagging steps were my first impressions
of the neglected house.
________________________________________________________________
6. The jewel thief saw the diamonds on display and for the next morning planning the
robbery.
________________________________________________________________
7. He is either visiting the buildings or work in his office.
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________________________________________________________________
8. I like baking and to eat them.
________________________________________________________________
9. England, the USSR, and Americans were allies in WWII.
________________________________________________________________
10. The doctor advises plenty of green vegetables, relaxing sensibly, and to sleep eight
hours daily.
________________________________________________________________
11. The insurance policy neither covers fire nor theft.
________________________________________________________________
12. Ellen has neither the dedication nor does she have the management experience for
that job
________________________________________________________________
13. Either Halima will fly to Addis or drive there.
________________________________________________________________
Vague Diction
diction – choice of words
vague - something which is not clear or ambiguous
One of the errors which affect the clarity of a sentence is vague diction. Vagueness is one of the
major weaknesses in diction. Words are vague when, in context, they do not convey to a reader
one specific meaning. We may have a word with several meanings. And any word that has more
than one meaning is bound to cause trouble. Consider this sentence:
Example:
I could tell by the funny look on her face that she was mad.
If you take the word mad
very angry: affected by great displeasure or anger
She’ll go mad when she finds out.
mentally ill: affected with a psychiatric disorder
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The other major weakness in diction is jargon. Jargon is a language that is used by a particular
group, profession, or culture, especially when the words and phrases are not understood or used
by other people. The chief characteristic of jargon is: highly abstract diction, often technical,
with a fondness for “learned” rather than popular words.
A word in one profession may give a different meaning in the other profession.
Medical jargon Common Use
patient patient
stool stool
examination room examination room
patient (common) (ordinary use) - capable of waiting, able to tolerate difficult circumstances
patient ( medicine) (jargon)- somebody who is being given medical treatment
stool(common) (ordinary use) - a simple seat with three or four legs and no back or arm rests
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examination room(common) (ordinary use) – a place where students are evaluated with paper
and pencil.
examination room (medicine) (jargon)- a place where a patient is investigated for a disease
Note:
During diction - Know your audience.
- Don’t use jargons in ordinary writing.
- Use common words which give one clear interpretation for all peoples.
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While I was visiting the National Art Gallery with a tour group last month, I decided to
stay longer when the group left after an hour, and so I told a friend that I would rejoin
the group at the Treasury Building in about half an hour. I moved from room to room
much more quickly than I wanted to, but after four hours I still had not seen all there
was to see. I never did rejoin the tour group that day.
This revision distributes the entire original into three sentences and makes the passage easier to
read. In addition the revision saves twenty-three words, a reduction of 20 per cent.
The following revision cuts the original drastically by leaving out material not considered
significant.
While visiting the National Art Gallery with a tour group last month, I stayed for four
hours after the group left. Even then I did not see all I wanted to
This version reduces the original eleven clauses to four and condenses the 106-word sentence to
thirty-one words in two sentences.
3.2 ECONOMY
The other requirement to achieve an effective sentence is economy. Economy is a relation
between the number of words used and the amount of meaning they convey. A sentence is not
economical because it is short or wordy because it is long. The focus is not the number of words
but the amount of information they convey. Consider the following two statements.
WORDY: I should like to make it entirely clear to one and all that neither I
nor any of my associates or fellow-workers had anything at all to
do in any way, shape, or form with this illicit and legally unjustifiable
act that has been committed.
IMPROVED: I want to make it clear to everyone that neither I nor any of my associates
had anything to do with this illegal act.
The first version takes forty-six words to say what is more clearly said at the second version in
twenty-four. The extra words do not add any significant information; they merely make reading
more difficult and annoy the reader by useless repetition of the same idea in different words.
WORDINESS
The other failure in the achievement of effective sentence is wordiness. Wordiness is using a large number of
unnecessary words. A wordy writer uses more words than are necessary to convey his meaning. The weight of
unnecessary words also tends to obscure meaning.
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* The task of every English teacher is to help develop in their students the ability to
understand and communicate in their native language.
- The task of every English teacher is to help students to communicate in their native
language.
* The truth of the matter is, to call a spade a spade, that he is afraid of her.
- The truth is that he is afraid of her.
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WORDY: The idea of communication has led the vanguard of the “New English”.
The emphasis now placed on the teaching of linguistics ties into the
importance implied in teaching children to communicate effectively.
IMPROVED: The modern trend is to emphasize the teaching of linguistics as an aid to
effective communication .
A. Preferring one exact word to two or more approximate words because many groups of words are simply
roundabout ways of expressing what a single exact word expresses more directly.
Wordy Direct
This day and age today
Of an indefinite nature indefinite
At this point in time now
By means of by
Call up on the telephone telephone
Destroy by fire bum
Was made recipient was given
Wordy: She described her deeds and doings as a foreign correspondent.
Revised: She described her adventure as a foreign correspondent.
B. Avoiding Redundancy:
Expressions such as visible to the eyes and audible to the ears are said to be
redundant; they say the same thing twice.
Redundant Direct
Advance forward Advance
Continue on Continue
Refer back Refer
Combine together Combine
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3.3 EMPHASIS
The other requirement to achieve an effective sentence is emphasis . Emphasis is a reflection of
purpose. There are usually several ways of expressing any idea, and if one way gives greater
emphasis than others to what a writer wants to stress, that is the best way.
Here we shall discuss three ways of obtaining purposeful emphasis.
1. Emphatic word order
2. Emphatic repetitions
3. Emphatic voice
1. Emphatic Word Order
The way word order is used to obtain emphasis in a sentence depends on two
considerations:
• What words does the writer wish to emphasize?
• What positions with in a sentence provide the most emphasis?
In an English sentence, both the beginning and the end are emphatic positions. The most
important material is put in these positions, and less important material is placed in the middle.
Notice the difference between the following statements
On July 31, 1973, a plane crash which killed eighty-eight
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people and which was the first fatal crash for Delta Airlines
in 95 million passenger miles occurred at Boston's Logan
International Airport.
The first version puts the date and place in the most emphatic positions in the
sentence, the beginning and the end, and the number killed and Delta’s impressive safety record
in the least emphatic position .
The second version puts the most significant information, that is, the number killed and
Delta's impressive safety record in the beginning and in the end (where it will get the greater
emphasis), and fills in the middle with the place and date.
2. Emphatic Repetition
Key words and ideas can be repeated for emphasis for the fact that intentional
repetition can produce a desired emphasis. Careless and awkward repetition of words makes
sentences weak and flabby, but careful, deliberate repetition of key words, when not overdone,
can be an effective way of gaining emphasis, as in the following sentence.
.
A moderately honest man with a moderately faithful wife,
moderate drinkers both, in a moderately healthy home: that
is the true middle class unit.
3. Emphatic Voice
Verbs in the active voice create more emphasis than verbs in the passive voice. The
active voice puts the subject (the actor) first, following it with the active verb, and then the object
(the receiver of the action).
Eg. The cat killed the rat.
The passive voice turns things around, putting the receiver in front, then the verb, and finally the
actor.
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But there are situations in which the passive voice is more emphatic than the active. The
beginning of a sentence is, as we have seen, a position of stress, and putting an unimportant word
or phrase there tends to emphasize it - sometimes unwisely.
For example:
-The mail man delivers mail twice a day
-A person cannot smoke in this section of the plane.
-People should expect some delay in these circumstances.
- Someone stole her car from the parking lot.
In these sentences the stress should not fall on the grammatical subjects, which are of almost no
interest to the thoughts conveyed. Passive constructions, ignoring these subjects entirely, give
more accurate emphasis.
Mail is delivered twice a day.
Smoking is prohibited in this section of the plane.
In these circumstances some delay is to be expected
Her car was stolen from the parking lot.
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References
Ploeger , Katherine (2000) Simplified Paragraph Skills. NTC / Contemporary Publishing Group. U S A
Wiener, Harvey S. (1984) Creating Composition, Fourth Edition , McGraw-Hill Book Company.
Leggett, Mead, and Charvat (1978) Prentice-Hall Handbook for Writers( Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey , Ninth
Edition.
Schiffhorst , Gerald j. (1997) The Short Hand Book for Writers ,McGraw-hill book
Tyner ,Thomas E. (1987)College Writing Basics, Wads Worth Publishing Company, California.
Longan, John (1997) Forth Edition. College Writing Skills with Readings.
Mc Crimmon (1976) writing with a purpose. Sixth Edition. Florida State University.
Needleman , Morris H. (1968) Handbook for Practical Composition, McGraw-Hill Book Company, New York.
Rorabacher, Louise E. (1963) A Concise Guide to Composition, Second Edition , New York.
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BDU, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
SOPHOMORE ENGLISH UNIT 4: PARAGRAPH DEVELOPMENT
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A paragraph is a group of sentences related to one main idea, which is expressed in the
topic sentence, usually the first sentence of the paragraph. The topic sentence is a summary
sentence, informing the reader of a paragraph’s topic, of main idea. All other sentences in the
paragraph most help, show, prove, or explain that topic sentence.
Katherine Ploeger (2000)
A paragraph is usually defined as a group of sentences that deal with the sane subject or
topic. One of there sentences of some kind about the topic. This statement is called the
topic sentence. The other sentences in the paragraph give additional information about the
idea stated in the topic sentence .These other sentences are called supporting sentences. Once
a writer can recognize both types of sentences, it will be easier for him/her to use them to
build paragraphs.
Edwin Ezor, and Lewis (1984)
A paragraph is a group of sentences that form a distinct unit developing one major idea. It
usually begins with an indentation, and its length varies according to the complexity of the
main idea to be developed. A typical paragraph quite often has about one hundred words and
seven to ten sentences in which every point in the paragraph having a useful role to play in
fulfilling the purpose of the paragraph.
Solomon G/ Giorgis (1991)
We can understand from these definitions that the difference between them is simply that of
wording.What are central in the definitions are:
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Example:
Suppose you want to write a paragraph about Police Work. The introductory part (topic sentence)
of your paragraph might look like:
Notice that this sentence is rather general as it stands. When we say general, the sentence by
itself does not tell enough about: What are these services? Why are they important? Who
performs them? When and where are they performed? And so on. But you should know that
though this sentence doesn't answer such questions, it introduces an over all idea that you want
to discuss later in the paragraph.
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4.2.2 Body
The body section of a paragraph is the part of the paragraph which provides details that refer
back to the introductory sentence. The job of providing the specific information that answers
questions about the introductory (topic) sentence is carried out by the other sentences in the
paragraph. These other sentences are usually called "supporting sentences". The information
they give is commonly called "details" or "supporting details".
Supporting sentences can supply information about the topic in a number of ways. They may
answer the question what kind of? by defining or explaining something in the topic sentence, or
by offering examples or a description of it. They may answer the question why? by giving
reasons that will help the reader to understand or agree with the idea suggested by the topic
sentence. In answering some other questions, they may describe the causes or origins of the
topic sentence, draw a conclusion from it, predict new events or ideas, or compare certain ideas
with other ideas. They may also accomplish several of these purposes at the same time.
Let's refer to our example about police work to review more thoroughly how supporting
sentences can add information. Notice how the writer has added some details after the opening
(topic) sentence:
Police officers perform many important services. They may be involved in solving
crimes. They may find themselves helping lost children. Often police officers are
also called upon to calm frightened people or to assist someone who has been
wronged. They may give aid to motorists whose cars have broken down or who have
been in accidents.
The details the writer has added explain How? or In what ways? police officers can perform
important services. A writer needs to be sure that most of the details that are included in the
material refer directly back to the topic sentence. Other details may be indirectly related; that is,
they may describe one of the directly related details.
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If we go back to our sample paragraph on police work, for example, "helping children" is a
directly related detail because it answers the question How? about police work The word "lost"
describes children, however, rather than police work, and is therefore an indirectly related
detail. The details in this paragraph all refer back to the topic either directly or indirectly. So it is
clear, as you read the entire paragraph, exactly what the topic is.
4.2.3 Conclusion
The concluding sentence draws the paragraph to a close, and reflects the ideas, expressed in
the topic sentence. In formal paragraphs you will sometimes see a sentence at the end of the
paragraph which summarizes the information that has been presented. .
Here is a sample paragraph in which the concluding sentence summarizes the information
presented by the supporting sentences.
There are three reasons why Canada is one of the best countries in the world. First, Canada
has an excellent health care system. All Canadians have access to medical services at a
reasonable price. Second, Canada has a high standard of education. Students are taught by
well–trained teachers and are encouraged to continue studying at university. Finally,
Canada’s cites are clean and efficiently managed. Canadian cities have many parks and lots
of space for people to live. As a result, Canada is a desirable
place to live.
Note:
1. The concluding (clincher) sentence restates the main idea, rather than merely repeating it,
in terms of the nature of the development of the paragraph.
2. Not all academic paragraphs contain concluding sentences, especially if the paragraph is
very short. However, if your paragraph is very long, it is a good idea to use a concluding
sentence.
3. A concluding sentence may not be the last sentence of a paragraph, as the writer may
want to end within a sentence that leads to the point of the next paragraph.
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Topic Sentence
Each paragraph has a clear topic sentence. The topic sentence alerts readers to the essence of
the paragraph by stating the central idea and by expressing the writer’s attitude toward it.
A topic sentence is a sentence that expresses the main idea of a paragraph. It tells the reader
what to expect about the information that will follow. Without the use of a topic sentence,
developing a paragraph can be difficult.
Here are some examples of a topic sentence in different positions of a paragraph (in bold
print):
1. There were a variety of reasons why people said they went to football games. Some of the fans said they
went to games because they felt it would help their team to win the series. Others considered going to foot
ball games more exciting than watching them on TV. A few felt that purchasing tickets to football games
would ensure the financial success of the game and, thus, its continuance. And a very small number
explained that going to football games was strictly a social occasion.
2. Homework is one of those necessary evils of being a student. The one sure way that
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a teacher knows how to measure your progress in his/her course is to assign homework
that tests your knowledge of the information that is taught. Some instructors, however,
seem to use homework as a way of reassuring themselves that they have “taught” the
information to the students. Many students, aware of these ideas about homework, tend
to treat homework as a chore, putting little or no thought into the work that is turned in.
However, like any designated task, homework is a reflection not only on you as a
student, but also on you as an individual. When an employer has to decide whether or
not to hire you, he or she has to consider your ability to complete the demands of the
working world. For many employers, the way that you handle your “homework” in
college often indicates the way that you will handle your homework on the job. For
example, often your grade in a class is determined by the quality of the homework that
you do. That homework grade can be a significant part of your final grade for the course.
In fact, many students can attest to an experience where the homework grade made the
difference in their final course grade. Once you leave college and attempt to find a job,
those homework grades translate into final GPAs for your major. Those final GPAs
show up on resumes and job applications and employers look to see if you have done
your “homework” in school as a key factor in determining if you will do your
“homework” on the job.
4. In Arab countries, where women do not have equal rights, men commonly cut in front of
women at ticket window. In Britain and the United States, where “first come, first
served” is almost an obsession, many businesses have customers take numbers to ensure
that “first come’ is really “first served.” By contrast, in southern Europe, where people
don’t like businesses regulating their behavior, lines are disorderly, with lots of pushing
and shoving for the best position; the strongest or most aggressive win. Anthropologists
who study line-forming behavior have concluded that the way people wait in line
reflects cultural values about fairness.
5. The wonder of omelets is that so many things can be put into them. Take cheese, for
example. All sorts of cheese, like Swiss or provolone, feta or mozzarella, slide
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deliciously into the omelet's fold, enhancing the texture of the eggs. And vegetables,
from the predictable onions and green peppers to the less common spinach and kohlrabi,
add vital flavor. Still more lavish, for those who are not vegetarians, is the addition of a
meat, possibly pepperoni or bacon or ham. But the omelet's most exotic components
might be the fruits that give it tang: raisins and avocados. Maybe someday an
enterprising chef will figure out how to mix liquor and candy with eggs to produce
vodka – and – fudge omelets.
NOTE
Topic sentences are not the only way to organize a paragraph, and not all paragraphs need a topic sentence. For
example, paragraphs that describe, narrate, or detail the steps in an experiment do not usually need topic sentences.
Topic sentences are useful, however, in paragraphs that analyze and argue. Topic sentences are particularly useful
for writers who have difficulty developing focused, unified paragraphs (i.e., writers who tend to sprawl). Topic
sentences help these writers develop a main idea or claim for their paragraphs, and, perhaps most importantly, they
help these writers stay focused and keep paragraphs manageable.
Summary
1) Topic sentence expresses the main idea of a paragraph
2) A topic sentence usually states a definite opinion or attitude.
3) A topic sentence provides the reader with a clear understanding of what a paragraph is about.
4) A topic sentence gives direction to a paragraph that both the writer and reader can follow.
5) A topic sentence often begins a paragraph or is found near the beginning of a paragraph.
6) Other sentences within a paragraph relate to the topic sentence
7) The final " wrap - up " sentence in a paragraph often reinforces the topic sentence
Exercise
Underline the topic sentence in each paragraph: the sentence that expresses the paragraph's main idea. [Remember:
The topic sentence may not always be the first sentence in the paragraph.]
1. The weather in March was unpredictable. One day there was heavy ground fog, and the next day was clear.
It rained for a few days and cleared up and then it rained again. One day the temperature ranged from 45
degrees to 75 degrees, and the next day the temperature stayed around 55 degrees all day long. It was
difficult to plan activities or know what to wear with such un- predictable weather.
2. Your sweaters are quite colorful. I like the bright red one you wear to football games. I also like the purple
turtleneck sweater you wear every Friday. My favorite is the red, white, and blue striped one you wear on
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holidays. But the wildest one has to be the fluorescent orange pullover with the pink and black polka dots. I
couldn't believe that you wore it to church last Sunday.
3. Freddie is very shy. At parties he sits in a corner by himself all night. When he is in a crowd, you would
never notice him. When you talk to him, he looks at the ground and stammers out one-word replies. He
never speaks in class, and I've never seen him talk to a girl .He is a nice person but few people ever get to
know him.
4. The sky is a clear blue. Sparrows chirp in the early mornings. The fruit trees in the backyard are beginning
to bloom. The hills are turning green, and purple and yellow wildflowers are appearing in the fields. The
snow on top of Camel Mountain has all melted. It must finally be spring.
5. The sidewalks in our neighborhood are filthy. The melting snow has left a muddy film on the concrete.
Garbage is piled up because of the collectors' strike. Packs of dogs have left their waste everywhere. Old
newspapers carpet the sidewalks, and neighborhood drunks have left their bottles piled against the
buildings. You can't walk anywhere without stepping on something.
A paragraph is a group of sentences that develops one main point or idea. One important feature of an effective
paragraph is unity: all sentences within the paragraph are related to the main point.
Here is an example of a unified paragraph. The first sentence expresses the main point of the
paragraph and the rest of the sentences relate to the main point.
1. Your sister is an attractive woman. Her large, dark eyes are beautiful. Her complexion is flawless, and she
has a lovely big smile. Her long, black hair is full and shiny. She is tall and slender, and her every
movement is graceful. She also dresses stylishly, and her assortment of passant skirts and loose- fitting
blouses look great on her.
The main point of the paragraph (how attractive the woman is) is supported by a number of specific details:
beautiful eyes, flawless skin, a lovely smile, beautiful hair graceful movements, and stylish dress. Notice that
there is even more specific detail to describe some of these features; large, dark eyes, full, shiny black hair, and
passant skirts and loose- fitting blouses.
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2. We had a terrible storm last night. The winds blew up to fifty miles an hour and it rained very hard. Eucalyptus
trees by the river blew over, and one tree hit a power line and blacked out the area for five hours. Downtown
the main street was flooded; the cars were left stranded in the bumper- deep water. Before morning the river
flooded its banks and people living nearby were forced to flee their homes with whatever belongings they could
gather. It was the worst storm in the country since 1958.
The main point of the paragraph is that the storm was terrible. The rest of the sentence relate to the main
point by showing how bad the storm was. It knocked down trees, flooded Main Street, caused a blackout, and
forced people from their homes. The paragraph is unified because all the sentences relate to the main point of
the paragraph.
2. The housing industry in Omaha is not doing well. House sales are down 65 percent from two years ago.
The average length a house is on the market before being sold is two years. The average house price has
actually dropped $5,000 this year. There has also been no new housing construction within the city limits
in the last six months. Two building contractors have gone out of business, and the carpenter's union has
sixty-five unemployed members. Lumber sales have dropped over 35 percent, and the local mill has sold
three logging trucks and laid off twenty- five workers. It has been the worst period for the housing industry
in over thirty years.
The main point of the paragraph (the housing industry is doing badly) is supported by a number of specific
facts: sales are down, house prices are down, construction has stopped, carpenters are unemployed, and lumber
sales are down. The last sentence concludes the paragraph by reinforcing just how bad the housing situation is.
But the following paragraph has sentences that are not related to the main idea.
4. When I was growing up, one of the places I enjoyed most was the cherry tree in the back yard. Behind the yard
were an alley and then more houses. Every summer when the cherries began to ripen, I used to spend hours
high in the tree, picking and eating the sweet, sun-warmed cherries. My mother always worried about my
falling out of the tree, but I never did. But I had some competition for the cherries- flocks of birds that enjoyed
them as much as I did and would perch all over the tree, devouring the fruit whenever I wasn’t there. I used to
wonder why the grown-ups never ate any of the cherries; but actually when the birds and I had finished, there
weren’t many left.
No sentence is completely irrelevant to the general topic of this paragraph (the cherry tree),
but the sentences Behind the yard was an alley and then more houses and My mother always
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worried about my falling out of the tree, but I never did do not develop the specific idea in
the first sentence: enjoyment of the cherry tree.
Exercise 1
Circle the letter of one sentence in each group that is not clearly related to the topic for that group of sentences.
1. Topic: I am sick of eating 'Ambasha'
a. I've been eating 'Ambasha' twice a day all semesters.
b. It is starting to taste like dog food
c. I love Injera very much.
d. I'm getting fat from eating 'Ambasha'.
e. I get a stomachache just thinking about eating another 'Ambasha'
2. Topic: There are many ways to study for a test.
a. You can review a few hours the night before the test.
b. You can study an hour a night the week of the test
c. You can study with friends and help each other
d. You can get up early the morning of the test and study
e. You can improve your grades by attending class regularly
3. Topic: Bahir Dar is a pleasant place to live
a. There are three movie theaters in town.
b. The people are friendly.
c. There is very little crime.
d. There is a bad smell coming from the town dump.
e. There are many places to shop for clothes.
4. Topic: The baby isn't hungry this morning.
a. She keeps spitting out her food.
b. She keeps playing with her food.
c. She turns her head when I try to feed her
d. Her stomach looks stuffed.
e. She loves rice pudding for lunch.
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Exercise 2
Each of the following paragraphs contains one sentence that is not clearly related to the topic for that
paragraph. Cross out the unrelated sentence so that the paragraph becomes unified.
1. We had a short spring this year. The weather was cold through March and into April due to storms moving down
from Canada. There was still snow on the mountains in late April hugely. It is usually gone by the end of March. We
had only two nice weeks in May with the temperatures in the low 70s. The winter was unusually mild, however ...
But by Mid- May temperatures were in the 90s, and it was hot from then on.
2. The dormitory rooms were unusually large. They were sixteen - foot - high ceilings added to the feeling of
spaciousness, as did the light - colored walls and the mirrored closet doors. There was space in the rooms for two
double beds, dressers, a console television, and a sofa and chair. The cupboard space was small and cramped. They
looked twice the size of your average dormitory rooms.
3. My brother is driving me crazy. First he borrows my razor and doesn't put it back. Then he'll sneak into the
kitchen and eat the pancakes I've cooked for myself. He helps me with my homework, which I appreciate. Then he
borrows
my car and returns it with the gas tank empty. Finally, he borrows money from me and never pays it back. I’ll be
glad when he moves out of the house.
Exercise 3
Each of the following paragraph topics is followed by two sentences that relate to the topic. Add two more
sentences of your own that are also related to the topic, and hence, would make a unified paragraph
Example
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1. Topic: Mildred's front yard is full of flowers.
a. There are rose bushes below the kitchen window.
b. Blooming sweet pea vines cover a trellis to the north of the living room window
c. Petunias cower the bed in front of the low
d. Pansies glow in pots on the front parch
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4.3.2 Coherence
Literally, the word to cohere means to hold together. A paragraph is said to have coherence when its sentences are
woven together or flow into each other. If a paragraph is coherent, the reader moves easily from one sentence to the
next without feeling that there are gaps in the thought, puzzling jumps, or points not made. If a paragraph lacks
coherence the reader will feel that he is reading a collection of separate statements rather than an integrated
discussion. Therefore, the notion behind coherence is related to having natural flow of ideas in the paragraph.
You can achieve coherence in your paragraph by using several cohesive devices. The followings are some of these
devices.
4.3.2.1 Pronouns: Since each pronoun must refer to an antecedent, a pronoun and its antecedent form a link. You
can often make a paragraph coherent merely by using pronouns properly. On the other hand, incorrectly used
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pronouns can weaken coherence. In the following examples, notice how pronouns in the second sentence of each
pair provide coherence by referring to the important subjects in the first.
Example:
Self-help books continue to proliferate. They appeal to anxieties of our middle-
aged society.
Patients must fast for twelve hours before the test. They should also avoid red meats for seventy-two hours
before coming in.
- Use direct repetition with care. Overdoing it will give an awkward, immature ring to your writing.
Example:
Daily receipts are taken to the central office. Daily receipts are then tallied….
You can get much the same transition al affect by using synonyms or slightly altered forms of the repeated
expressions.
Example:
Bill Clinton has been somewhat distant since leaving the White House. The former president has settled in to a
life of privacy.
4. 3. 2. 3 Transitional markers: Transitional terms make a paragraph coherent by relating ideas. They are referred
to as the ‘ glue’ to hold ideas together. Like pronouns, many of these terms come to mind automatically, but you
should carefully choose among them. The commonest markers are the simple connectives and, or but, for, which
serve as a bridges over which the reader may easily pass from one sentence or clause to the next. Others -
sometimes called transitional connectives - indicate the direction, which the new sentence is about to take and to
prepare the reader for what is to follow. Here is a partial list of common transitional terms:
1. Time: next, then, after, before, during, while, following, shortly, thereafter, later on, the next day,
secondly, finally
2. Place: over, above, inside, to the left, just behind, beyond
3. Contrast: however, but, on the other hand, nevertheless, nonetheless, notwithstanding, on the
contrary, conversely, yet.
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4. Cause - effect: so, therefore, thus, accordingly, consequently, as a result, hence, because of this.
5. Addition: and, furthermore, moreover, likewise, similarly, in a like manner, too, also
6. Emphasis: indeed, in fact, especially, most important
7. Summary: in other words, in short, to sum up , in conclusion, to conclude, all in all, in a nut shell,
generally, in general, finally, at last, etc.
8. Example: for instance, for example, that is, in particular
Effect money for acts of charity. Thus indulgences were born. The opportunities for
abusing this practice of giving money in place of penance, however, were
Effect
Repetition numerous. Indulgences were frequently criticized, and Luther’s famous attack on
them was one among many. Yet the principle is sound and difficult to attack
Contrast
without undermining the entire theology of penance.
Repetition
Pronoun Contrast
2. Comparison
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at the same time In the same way
in like manner Like X, Y [verb]….
in the same way X and Y are similar in that (they)…..
like wise X is similar to Y in that (they)…..
similarly One way in which X is similar to Y is (that)…..
Another way in which X is similar to Y is (that)…..
3. Concession
but I know that of course
granted that to be sure now
4. Contrast
otherwise in contrast where as /while but
conversely instead not withstanding yet
however inversely on the contrary though
in another sense never the less on the one hand to be
sure
in contrast with this nonetheless on the other hand still
yet at the same time despite it turning now to another matter. even so
5. Emphasis
above all I repeat likewise
add to this in any event moreover
and also indeed that is
besides in fact too
even more in other words
6. Enumeration
finally further second then again
first next then
7. Illustration
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all things considered incidentally thus thus it follows
as you will see in connection with that is take the case of
for example in this way therefore as an example of this
for instance just as to illustrate in particular
8. Parenthesis
by the way incidentally to digress
coming back to parenthetically to resume
9. Progression
as (in consequence) hence on that account
for that reason in the first place therefore
further in the next place
further more more over
10. Retrospection
as has already been suggested hitherto up to this point
if what I have said is correct so far
11. Similarity
by the same token in similar manner similarly
in like manner likewise
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at length forth with meanwhile previously
at the same time from now on immediately since then
subsequently there after there upon where upon
14. Summary
as has been said indeed in short in retrospect
for these reasons in fine in sum to sum up
SEQUENCING
Suppose you have many notes about your ideas for a writing assignment. How do you put all
these ideas together in a logical way that will make sense to the reader? The sentences should
follow each other in the most sensible order for developing the main idea of the paragraph. This
process of putting things in their proper order is called Paragraph sequencing.
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In telling about an event the clearest way to present the moment is to give the details in chronological order. You
should use this sequence for related details or examples when you want to state them in the time order in which they
occur. In other words, you will list the earliest details first in your paragraph and the latest or most recent details
toward the end of your paragraph. This is a very common sequence for a series of events. The details in a paragraph
of this kind tend to answer such questions as what happens first. And then what happens last? Paragraphs that relate
either a series of incidents or steps in a process often follow such chronological order; in this way is mostly used in
narrative paragraphs or essays. The following paragraph, for example, is narrative. (The details are arranged in
chronological order)
First: The most terrifying day in my life came in July of 1946. I was washing lunchtime dishes in our
farmhouse in middle Georgia when my husband unexpectedly appeared at the door." Appeared"
is the best word that I can
Second: think to use, because he was not walking but crawling, dragging his left leg. I got out of him as
quickly as possible that he had bitten by a copperhead of some three feet, a snake large enough
for its venom to be fatal. We lived thirty miles from the nearest hospital, I did not have a
driver’s license (and
Third: , in fact, had never driven a car), but my husband was dying before my eyes. I pushed/ pulled him
into the back seat of our Chevrolet and pointed the car toward Atlanta.
Example 2
Sunday was a long day. I had to get up at 5:00 am to attend an Easter sunrise service .Then I had
duties at the church the rest of the morning. In the afternoon, I visited the Manor Rest Home and
talked to shut–ins who seldom has visitors. Then I went to my aunt’s for dinner and played cards
with Uncle Herman until about 9:00 pm. Then I drove up in to the hills with my family for a special
Easter midnight chapel service in the pines. We stayed in a mountain cabin with ten other people that
night and did not get to sleep until after 2:00 a m. I was exhausted after twenty-one hours of activity.
Bridging thoughts through transitions, idea connectors, which move the reader from place to place.
Connecting words – connecting through time.
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Later on Third Tomorrow Further
Afterward Suddenly Then Previously
Years ago Now In the past When
Earlier Sometime later Thereafter at last
Before Once Former meanwhile
Next Often Latter
First Yesterday In the first place
Second Today In the next place
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B. Spatial Order
If you want your readers to be able to picture a scene or object you are describing, you could use a spatial sequencing of
details. This sequence describes a scene or object by going from one part of it to another in an organized. For instance if
you intended your details to describe a building of some kind you might want to sequence the details so that you went
from the bottom to the top of the building by answering such questions as what is on the first floor ? the second floor ?
the third floor? and soon, until you had covered all the floors .or you might wish to go in the opposite direction
,beginning at the top and proceeding down , floor by floor, to the lowest floor. Or you might describe the same building
by going from side to side; answering questions like what is on one side of the building? the section in the middle ? the
other side of the building ? And, of course ,you could move in any direction in side the building; left to right , north to
south, up to down, side to side, near to far, or whatever.
Example 1:
As you enter the library, you are greeted by paintings on each side of the door. The painting on
the right is of the town’s high school, and on the left is a watercolor of the town’s city hall.
There are several other works of art in the main body of the building. As you face the archway
on the left, you discover pieces of pottery enclosed in a glass case. A ceiling mural appears over
the archway, and on the right a wall hanging has been hung. The entire library is filled with
works of art.
Example 2:
The kitchen was living room, dining room, and cooking room. There were two long narrow windows in one wall. An
iron coal range was recessed in another wall. Above the stove the recess was made of coral-colored bricks and creamy
white plaster. It had a stone mantelpiece and a slate hearthstone on which Martha could draw pictures with chalk. Next
to the stove was a water boiler which got hot when the fire was going. Often on a cold day, Martha came in chilled and
put her arms around the boiler and pressed her frosty cheek gratefully against its warm silveriness. Next to the boiler
was a pair of soapstone washtubs with a wooden cover. The partition could be removed and the two thrown into one for
a bath tub. It didn’t make a very good bath tub. Sometimes when Martha sat in it, the cover banged down on her head.
The bottom was rubble and she came out of what should have been a refreshing bath, all sore from sitting on what wet
roughness. Then there were four faucets to contend with. No matter how the child tried to remember that they were
inflexibly there and wouldn’t give way, she would jump up suddenly out of the soapy water and get her back whacked
good on a faucet. Martha had a perpetual angry welt on her back.
Expressions which help to answer the details question “where?” such as:
Over On top (of)
Under On bottom (of)
In front of Along side (of)
Behind Outside (of)
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Near Inside (of)
Far from
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C. General Sequencing:
1. Specific-to-General
2. General-to-Specific
1.Specific-to-General
Specific terms give more information than general ones. For example, surgeon implies doctor,
but doctor does not identify a person as a surgeon. If you find yourself writing people when you
mean college students or taxi drivers, you are not asking yourself this important question: am I
identifying what I am referring to as specifically as I should? The following list shows how little
effort it takes to become more specific.
Example 1
General Specific More Specific
vehicle car Toyota Cressida
religion Christianity Roman Catholicism
building hotel Sheraton Hotel
Example 2
General: The vegetables were prepared.
Specific: We chopped the tomato, diced the carrots, and sliced the onions.
Specific: We steamed the carrots and baked the Idaho potatoes.
In Arab countries, where women do not have equal rights, men commonly cut in front of
women at ticket window. In Britain and the United States, where “first come, first served” is
almost an obsession, many businesses have customers take numbers to ensure that “first come’
is really “first served.” By contrast, in southern Europe, where people don’t like businesses
regulating their behavior, lines are disorderly, with lots of pushing and shoving for the best
position; the strongest or most aggressive win. Anthropologists who study line-forming
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behavior have concluded that the way people wait in line reflects cultural values about
fairness.
Example 4
They should be good listeners. They should also be good talkers, since they have to sum up and
restate what both sides say. They have to promise to keep private what is said at a mediation
session. They also need to be able to encourage others to open up and say what is on their
minds. These are the qualities of good mediators.
2. General-to-Specific
When writing about a topic that involves many layers of details, you can start the
paragraph with a general statement, followed by supporting details and examples that
become more and more specific.
Example 1 When a paragraph begins with a general statement and followed by specific details, it is logical to say
the paragraph is organized from general-to-specific.
Dreams are common events during sleep. Dreams occur during rapid eye movement sleep. During these
rapid eye movement sessions, the body is paralyzed to prevent harm coming to the sleeping person from
unconscious muscle movements that occur in response to the images in the dream. Rapid eye movement
sessions sleep takes place about every 90 minutes.
Example 2
In the future, a young woman trained to be an engineer will not only improve her own life but may also
make our country a better place for everyone. She may, for instance, devise a new kind of automobile
engine that does not require gasoline at all. That would make our country less dependent on other nations
for oil imports. Her invention would also serve the cause of world peace, because our country truly free
from pressure by other countries would be stronger politically, economically, and militarily and would be
better able to resist threats to world peach. She also involves in any activities of the society as many women
engineers of today step through factories’ corridors in greater numbers than ever before.
D. Sequence in Importance
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You generally sequence the points by their importance; you should use this sequence when you want to give
several details or examples and wish to start your paragraph with the most important or more interesting ones. You
may do this in order to attract the attention of your readers at the very start, especially readers who may be
impressed for time or who may be uninterested in your subject.
To start with the least important and to lead to the most important , for example, a comparison of two cars might
start with the engine and its importance , then work outward to the passenger compartment, its dimension and
comfort, ending with the sporty exterior and sunroof. You must decide which sequencing method is best for your
purpose and audience.
Example:
When I returned to my old neighborhood, I was sad to see how many things had changed.
-Mr. Lewis, my old history teacher, had died in a car accident.
-Mike’s Pizzeria, a local hangout, was destroyed in a fire.
-The park bench where I spent hours reading was gone.
From the incidents, because it seems to be the most important would best be first in the paragraph, it would be best
discussed first in the paragraph.
Example:
Our department needs lots of fixing-up. Though it may be difficult to fix-up all of them at the
same time, we have got to fix the leaky roof first before the September rains come. Next, we
need to patch the big holes in the bed room walls and then strip the peeling paint off the walls.
Then we can repaint the apartment. After the walls are painted, we can work on replacing the
linoleum squares in the kitchen that are loose or cracked. Later, the living room carpet needs
shampooing, and we should replace that old swaybacked sofa. Then we won’t be embarrassed to
have company over once in a while.
Of course, only the writer himself could determine which was most or least significant.
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The writer can follow the opposite approach, for example, the least important ones come first in the paragraph, the
important next and the most important details come last. This arrangement allows you to build up your reader’s
interest gradually (to create suspense if it is in fiction writing), with your final details providing a climax.
4.3.3 Completeness
Completeness is relative. How much explanation an idea requires depends on how much the reader needs. This is a
decision the writer must make out of knowledge of the subject and of the audience. It is an error to give either too
much explanation or not enough. Usually the latter is the more serious. Giving a reader unnecessary explanation
may be boring but giving too little may block communication. Consider the following example.
Pregnant women sometimes attempt to mold the character of an unborn child by studying poetry,
art, or mathematics. What we know of prenatal development makes such attempts seem utterly
impossible. How could such extremely complex influences pass from mother to child?
This statement is incomplete. If the writer stops here, all he has given his readers is an unsupported judgment that
these attempts will have no influence on the child. But that is not enough. Readers still need to know why the
attempts will not work. The rest of the paragraph explains why not.
There is no connection between their nervous systems. Even the blood vessels of mother and child
do not join directly. They lie side by side and the chemicals are interchanged through the walls by
a process that we call osmosis. An emotional shock to the mother will affect her child, because it
changes the activity of her glands and so the chemistry of her blood. Any chemical change in the
mother's blood will affect the child. But we can not see how a liking for mathematics or poetic
genius can be dissolved in the blood and produce a similar liking or genius in the child.
(William H. Roberts, Psychology)
The following example illustrates the same fault and the way to correct it.
Television programs can be classified into three main categories: Entertainers, cultural
Enhancers, and Eye Openers. The Entertainers are created simply for Entertainment-nothing
more. They make us laugh or cry, for a moment. Sitcoms are prime examples as we laugh at or
with the characters as they struggle through life, and might even identify with the characters.
For momentary pleasures, watch the Entertainers. Cultural Enhancers involve some kind of
“culture “or highbrow activity, such as opera, theater, dance, or song. Also included here are
the movies made from the classics or literary fiction, such as Moby Dick or any of
Shakespeare’s plays. These programs are often concerned with universal themes or issues: love,
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evil, power. They can be found on “arts” cable stations such as A&E and Bravo, as well as the
public Broadcasting system. For a taste of culture, watch Cultural Enhancers.
As you observe in the above paragraph, the writer's intention was to classify the kinds of television programs
grouping in to three. But he has mentioned only two of them. Since he didn't say anything about the third one, the
paragraph is incomplete. To provide a fuller explanation, the following sentence gives the remaining information.
A third category, Eye Opener programs, includes topics about science and nature, history, true crime, and other
information. They are often found on cable channels: the Discovery Channel, the Learning Channel, and the
History Channel. The Public Broadcasting System, on the network side, also provides these programs. A viewer
might learn about tornadoes, or the legend of Robin Hood, or the African crested crane. Often this information,
such as programs about strong storm systems, is interesting because it is relevant to viewers’ lives. Television has
much to offer viewers, and it is our choice what we watch.
NOTE:
A good paragraph is fully developed. Here are the main qualities of a well-developed paragraph.
It provides enough supporting points for the main idea expressed in the topic sentence to be
clearly understood.
It provides enough specific details and examples to be interesting and informative.
It does not leave the readers with unanswered questions that could be cleared up with a little more
detail or an additional example or two.
It concludes with a sentence that clearly" wraps up" the paragraph and relates to the topic sentence
in some manner.
4.3.4 Variety
Effective writers have the ability to use a variety of sentence structures to express their thoughts. Less experienced
writers tend to use a few basic structures over and over, which weakens their expressive powers and leads to a
monotonous writing style. The confidence and skill to use a variety of sentence structures helps you convey your
ideas to readers. Consider the following paragraph and detect what the problem of the paragraph is:
I enjoy Christmas very much. I like shopping. I like decorating the tree. I like giving presents. I
enjoy eating on Christmas Day. I enjoy eating turkey. I like a lot of dressing. I like pumpkin pie.
I also like being with the family. I like seeing my grandmother. I like seeing my nieces.
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The sentences in the paragraph are all of similar length (5, 3, 5, 4, 6, 4, 6, 4, 7, 5 and 5 words respectively).
Moreover, they are all simple sentences of the same basic structure (subject + predicate). This lack of variety
becomes monotonous.
The horror movie at the drive-in was terrible. The acting was bad. The plot was bad. Every
scene was filled with blood. There was blood on the bodies. There was blood on the walls.
There was blood in the bathtub. The ending of the movie was the worst part. It was stupid. It
was unbelievable. A six-year-old girl poisoned her mother, father, brother and dog with rat
poison. She did it for fun. She did it to shock her friends. It was the worst movie I have seen in a
long time. I went home. I didn't go to another movie for a month.
In general, a short or a long series of sentences identical or very similar in length and structure is monotonous. But a
series of well- written, varied sentences provides the reader with more than mere absence of monotony. It reflects
the writer's careful choice of length and structure to supply emphasis that creates meaning.
Consider the following paragraph. Notice the variety in length and structure of the seven sentences that make up the
paragraph.
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Notice how pleasing this paragraph is to the ear. By using a variety of sentence structures, the
writer changes the tempo of the writing, avoiding monotony. Notice, too, how the changes in
tempo lead to sentences of different length, ranging form three (they practice renunciation) to
twenty-six words (They believe in nonviolence and they worship the memory of a human
being who perhaps has come closer to enacting Christianity than anyone in modern
history). Thus, the two strategies - varying sentence length and varying sentence structure
-work together.
Consider the following paragraph. Notice the variety in length and structure of the eight sentences that make up the
paragraph.
The trouble with the families many of us were born into is not that they consist of meddlesome ogres
but they are too far away. In emergencies we rush across continents and if need be oceans to their
sides, as they do to ours. Maybe we even make a habit of seeing them, once or twice a year, for the
sheer pleasure of it. But blood ties seldom dictate our addresses. Our blood kin are often too remote
to ease us from our Tuesdays to our Wednesdays. For this we must rely on our families of friends. If
our relatives are not, do not wish to be, or for whatever reasons cannot be our friends, then by some
complex alchemy we must try to transform our friends into our relatives. If blood and roots don’t do
the job, then we must look to water and branches.
Jane Howard, Families
The length of these eight sentences ranges from the seven- word But blood ties seldom dictate our addresses to the
long thirty- three word sentence beginning If our relatives are not. Structure varies from the simple subject - verb -
object pattern of the crisp fourth, fifth, and sixth sentences of the much greater complexity of the opening twenty-six
word sentence and the two closing sentences of thirty - three and sixteen words respectively.
NOTE:
Short, simple sentences and longer, more complex sentences can work together to achieve variety that enhances
meaning
If you are effectively using coordination , subordination, parallelism, and other sentence structures, your writing will
already contain a good deal of variety. you will have discovered, for instance, that short sentences are good for
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introducing a topic or summing up a point and that longer sentences lend themselves to elaboration , detailed
explanation, or qualification of a main idea.
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Supporting sentences
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Be powerful as this is the last thought that you are leaving with the
reader.
Be concise
though vary the length and structure of sentences
Ask a knowledgeable friend to review and comment on your paragraph and to repeat back
what you are trying to say. You may be surprised. Their comments should reflect your ideas
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Example
a. topic : Rural areas of Ethiopia
b. topic sentence : Rural areas in Ethiopia have three problems.
c. what are these three problems?
The answer to this question is used for writing the details.
Point 1- poverty
Point 2- lack of education
Point 3- poor medical care
Activity
In the above example, a topic sentence with possible details is given. Write a complete paragraph
by writing complete sentences of the details. You may start with the topic sentence followed by
details like this:
Rural areas in Ethiopia have three problems. One of these is poverty. It………..
………………………………………………………………………………………...
………………………………………………………………………………………...
………………………………………………………………………………………...
………………………………………………………………………………………...
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4.4.1 DEFINITION
One way to make a term or idea clearer is to answer the question What does the term or idea
mean. To answer this question, you can give a sentence defining the term or idea, followed by
examples. Or you can try to answer the question by relating the term or concept to some term or
idea the reader already knows about or understands.
Suppose, for instance, that the topic of a paper you are writing is empathy and that the statement you plan to make
about it is the basis for all good public relations. A reader who does not know the meaning of the term empathy will
find the paper difficult to understand. To help your reader to follow and to accept the ideas about empathy expressed
in your paper, you will need to supply a paragraph of definition.
Read the paragraph below and notice that the term “empathy” appears in the first sentence and
that a definition immediately follows the term in the same sentence. The writer has chosen to
follow the definition with a list of several examples of how empathy helps in police work, using
a simple topical- listing sequence details. The writer’s purpose in this paragraph is to help the
reader understand more fully the meaning of the term “empathy”.
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Example 1
Empathy is the ability to completely understand another person’s point of view. It is a great asset in
police work. By practicing empathy , police officers can avoid being closed- minded. It will help
them to see all sides of a traffic accident or a criminal incident. Empathy eliminates bias and ,
instead , introduces tolerance, understanding and sympathetic human relations.
Example 2
The paragraph below defines a term, explains it a bit, and then gives examples of it. After reading the paragraph,
see if you can answer the following questions that follow.
Emblems are gestures or body motions that mean the same as words or phrases. Just as
we learn the meanings of words, we learn the meanings of emblems in our society. One
common emblem in many places is the thumbs-up signal, which often expresses
success or hope. Other emblems are shrugging of the shoulders, which can mean "I
don't know," and nodding the head to communicate "yes."
4.4.2 EXEMPLIFICATION
An example paragraph is one that uses specific examples to illustrate a point made in the writing. An example can
be a fact, a historical example, a statistic, an event or a behavior.
1. Fact
A fact is an idea understood as true or real by the community and not to be disputed. It is a fact that the
earth circles the sun, that chocolate has caffeine, that people get heart playing some sports.
2. Historical Example
This example involves retelling a historical event or relating a piece of historical information .these
examples can trace a progression of events for a causes and effect paragraph or show how the present is a
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reflection of the past. You could use different people from history to illustrate about leaders or criminals or
people who helped others without much reward.
3. Statistic
A statistic is a number that results from analyzing information: it is often an average or mean. Statistics are
complicated and can be misused, but statistical analysis is a valuable tool to prove a point, especially with
academic writing.
4. Event
An example can be one specific event you might mention the date and time of the event,
or if part of common knowledge, mention the name of the event and gives some details.
5. Behavior
Specific behavior of an individual person or animal can also be used as an example to prove a point. If you
want to say that dogs can sometimes be annoying, refer to specific behaviors: they chew every thing in
sight , dig up gardens, get hair or fur allover furniture, make a mess at their eating place, bark at the wrong
times( usually at 3:00 am) .each behavior is one example that adds detail to the writing .
Computer software programs come in a variety of types, each offering different functions to
users. The programs most often used are word processors. These programs can produce letters,
reports, articles, announcements as well as other documents. Another kind of computer program
is the database, which allows the users to sort all kinds of information in a variety of ways. You
might put on a database a library catalog, all the business products in inventory, or all the
names and addresses of students attending a school. Another kind of program is the
communications program, which allows the user to connect to the Internet and to send
electronic mail to others. If you can access the Internet, you can search thousands of databases,
files, and Web sites for information. You can access university libraries, company Web sites,
government information agencies. The computer offers many kinds of programs for users, each
with a distinct function or benefit to the users.
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In this sample paragraph three main examples of computer software programs are given: word
processors, data bases, and communications programs. With in each main example are more
specific examples that further explain and illustrate the writer’s ideas.
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In a paragraph a wrier may be discussing two or more topics. These could be two objects, events,
places, persons, or ideas, or some aspects of these. Usually the writer will want to discuss their
similarities only, or their differences only, with in a single paragraph. The paragraph is called a
comparison paragraph when it describes similarities and it is called a contrast paragraph when it
describes differences.
Some writing topics will ask you to consider the relationship between two things, for example, your hometown (that
is, the town where you were born or grew up) and your university town. Such topics may allow you to organize
your paragraph either around the similarities between these two subtopics (for example, between your hometown
and your university town) or around the differences between them. If you write about the similarities, the paragraph
will be a comparison paragraph. On the other hand, if you want to write about the differences, your paragraph will
be a contrast paragraph.
This lesson will show you some ways in which you can structure sentences to write a comparison
or contrast paragraph. We will first look at comparison paragraph and then briefly look at
contrast paragraph.
The passage above is from a comparison paragraph. That is, a paragraph which discusses the
similarities between two subtopics. How the ideas in this paragraph are organized. As usual, the
topic sentence is at the beginning of the paragraph. After that, the paragraph continues by
discussing one point of similarity between the towns of Gridlock and Subnormal, namely, their
small population. Specific details are given to support the statement that “both are small rural
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communities.” Following this, the paragraph briefly discusses a second point of similarity
between the two towns, that is, their geographic surroundings. Here, the paragraph also gives
supporting details to illustrate their similarity, namely, they are “both located in rural areas.”
As you can see, therefore, this comparison paragraph is structured (organized) according to the
points of similarity between the two towns. This particular paragraph discus only two points of
similarity, but of course we can imagine a paragraph that gives three, four, or even more points
of similarity. This paragraph, for example, might continue in this way.
….Thirdly, both of these towns are similar in that both contain college campuses.
Gridlock, for example, is home to Neutron College, which is famous for its Agricultural
Economics program as well as for its annual Corn-Watching Festival. Likewise, the
town of Subnormal boasts the beautiful campus of Quark College, which is well known
for its Agricultural Engineering department and also for its yearly Hog-Calling Contest.
We can place the points of similarity and their supporting details in a table in order to see more clearly
how this short paragraph is organized:
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DETAILS (a) This college is famous for its Agricultural Economics Program.
It is also famous for its annual Corn–Watching Festival.
Subnormal contains Quark College
This campus is famous for its Agricultural Engineering department
DETAILS (b) It is also famous for its yearly Hog-Calling Contest
Point-To-Point. The above table shows a diagram of the organizational style called point-to-
point, and shows an example of a comparison paragraph using the point-to-point organizational
structure. Here, each section of the paragraph covers one major point that proves the topic
sentence. The two major items being compared (Gridlock & Subnormal) are addressed in their
own section, within each point’s part of the paragraph.
Topic sentence
Generalization: Point A
Details about Item 1
Details about Item 2
Generalization: Point B
Details about Item 1
Details about Item 2
Generalization: Point C
Details about Item 1
Details about Item 2
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Topic sentence
Generalization: Item 1
Details about Point A
Details about Point B
Details about Point C
Generalization: Item 2
Details about Point A
Details about Point B
Details about Point C
Example: Based on the above diagram of whole-to-whole organizational style, look how the
following paragraph is organized.
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As you see, after the topic sentence, this paragraph first discusses the relevant details about Gridlock and then
presents the details about Subnormal, as with the paragraph above, we can illustrate this paragraph’s structure in the
following way:
SUBTOPIC # 1 GRIDLOCK
SUBTOPIC#2 SUBNORMAL
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Comparison conjunctions
In the above paragraph you will see various conjunctions that contribute to paragraph coherence.
We can look at the above paragraph again to see what conjunctions are:
My hometown and my college town have several things in common. First, both are small
rural communities. For example, my hometown, Gridlock, has a population of only about
10,000 people. Similarly, my college town, Subnormal, consists of about 11, 000 local
residents. This population swells to 15,000 people when the college students are attending
classes. A second way in which these two towns are similar is that they are both
located in rural areas. Gridlock is surrounded by many acres of farmland, which is
devoted mainly to growing corn and soybeans. In the same way, Subnormal lies in the
center of farmland, which is used to raise hogs and cattle. Thirdly, these towns are similar
in that both contain college campuses. Gridlock, for example, is home to Neutron College,
which is famous for its Agricultural Economical program as well as for its annual Corn -
Watching Festival. Likewise, the town of Subnormal boasts the beautiful campus of Quark
College, which is well known for its Agricultural Engineering department and also for its
yearly Hog -Calling contest.
This paragraph, of course is organized according to similarities. Notice how the order of the similarities is the same
through out the paragraph. That is, at each similar point, the paragraph first discusses Gridlock and then it discusses
subnormal keeping the same order through out the paragraph prevents the reader from getting confused. Also notice
how the conjunctions (similarly, X is similar in that….) are placed near each similar point. Now examine the
following paragraph, which is organized by subtopic:
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My home town and my college town are similar in several ways. First, my home town
Gridlock is a small town. It has a population of only about 10, 000 people. Located in
rural area, Gridlock is surrounded by many acres of farmland which are devoted mainly to
growing corn and soybeans. Gridlock also contains a college campus, Neutron College,
which is famous for its Agricultural economics program as well as for its for its annual
Corn -Watching Festival. Yearly Hog -Calling contest. Subnormal, it too is small, having a
population of about 11, 000 local residents, which swells to 15,000 people when students
from the near by college are attending classes. LikeGridlock, Subnormal lies in the center
of farmland which is used to raise hogs and cattle. Finally Subnormal is similar to
Gridlock in that it also boasts a beautiful college campus, called Quark College. This
college is well known for its Agricultural Engineering department and also for its yearly
Hog -Calling contest.
These are not the only ways to give coherence to a comparison paragraph. There are other
conjunctions, too. Here is a list of comparison conjunctions you can use:
Short conjunctions
like alike resembles similarities as…..
just like likewise also same …. , too.
just as equally similarly similar both
Longer Expressions
In the same way
X is similar Y in that (they)…..
X and Y are similar in that (they)…..
Like X, Y [verb]….
In like manner
One way in which X is similar to Y is (that)…..
Another way in which X is similar to Y is (that)…..
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As mentioned above, a contrast paragraph discusses the differences between (at least) two things. You can organize
contrast paragraphs in much the same way that you can organize comparison paragraphs, that is, you can organize
them either according to points of similarity or according to sub topic. Here is an example of such a paragraph
organized by subtopic. Notice the contrastive expressions in bold letters.
Even though Arizona and Rhode Island are both states of the U.S., they are strikingly
different in many ways. For example, the physical size of each state is different. Arizona
is large, having area of 114,000 square miles, where as Rhode Island is only about a tenth
the size, having an area of only 1, 214 square miles. Another difference is in the size of
the population of each state. Arizona has about four million people living in it, but
Rhode Island has less than one million. The two states also differs in the lands of natural
environments that each has. For example, Arizona is a very dry state, consisting of large
desert areas that do not receive much rainfall every year. However, Rhode Island is
located in a temperate zone and receives an average of 44 inches of rain per year. In
addition, while Arizona is a landlocked state and thus has no seashore, Rhode Island lies
on the Atlantic Ocean and does have a significant coastline.
TOPIC (a) Arizona, and (b) Rhode Island are strikingly different in many ways
SENTFNCE
DETAILS (b) Rhode Island is smaller, having an area of only 1,214 square miles .
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POINT #3 The two states are different in the lands of natural environments
Comparison/Contrast Paragraph
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The writer may wish to develop a combined comparison/contrast pattern with in the same paragraph, i.e., the writer
may wish to discuss both the similarities and the differences between two objects, persons, places, events ,aspects,
etc., within one paragraph. With this type of paragraph, however, there is no rule or regularity about which should
come first. The first step what the writer should do is identifying the two subjects he/she is comparing or contrasting.
Sometimes the writer may wish to begin with discussing similarities, and other timers he/ she may want to begin
with discussing differences. Whatever the writer wanted to discuss first, he/she begin by telling his/her reader that he
will be discussing similarities as well as differences.
4.4.4 CLASSIFICATION
Classification is the process of putting a large number of items or behaviors into smaller,
well-defined groups. Each group’s members or items share similar traits or characteristics that
are unique; no other group has the same traits. The writer should put similar looking or acting
items or behaviors into the same group and describe one group’s unique traits, behaviors,
attitudes, or other characteristics.
Many classification systems are already in place; for example, movies are classified by genre:
Western, Romance, Science Fiction, and Thriller; subjects in school are classified by discipline:
Science, Mathematics, English, and Home Economics. Since this categories, already exist, they
do not present much challenge to the reader. In English classes, it is more
fun and creative to come up with your own topic and classification system. For example, if a
hotel prepares various foods, you might group them by type of food: vegetables, fruits, meat,
cookies, cheese and so forth. you might group drinks in to beverages, alcohol, soft drink. Or you
might put the original groups such as those prepared in home, and in factories. Or each can be
classified, for example, soft drinks, can be further classified as: Coca Cola, Sprite, Pepsi, Fanta,
Mirinda, Seven-Up, Mineral Water and so on.
Example 1
Homework assignments can be categorized according to the various emotional traits they
produce. For example, “The I- Will-Do-It-Later-Tonight” assignment is a relatively easy
assignment which takes no more than five or ten minutes and causes the student little
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Television programs can be classified into three main categories: Entertainers, cultural
Enhancers, and Eye Openers. The Entertainers are created simply for Entertainment-nothing
more. They make us laugh or cry, for a moment. Sitcoms are prime examples as we laugh at or
with the characters as they struggle through life, and might even identify with the characters.
For momentary pleasures, watch the Entertainers. Cultural Enhancers involve some kind of
“culture “or highbrow activity, such as opera, theater, dance, or song. Also included here are
the movies made from the classics or literary fiction, such as Moby Dick or any of Shakespeare’s
plays. These programs are often concerned with universal themes or issues: love, evil, power.
They can be found on “arts” cable stations such as A&E and Bravo, as well as the public
Broadcasting system. For a taste of culture, watch Cultural Enhancers. A third category, Eye
Opener programs, includes topics about science and nature, history, true crime, and other
information. They are often found on cable channels: the Discovery Channel, the Learning
Channel, and the History Channel. The Public Broadcasting System, on the network side, also
provides these programs. A viewer might learn about tornadoes, or the legend of Robin Hood, or
the African crested crane. Often this information, such as programs about strong storm systems,
is interesting because it is relevant to viewers’ lives. Television has much to offer viewers, and it
is our choice what we watch.
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Note:
Like the other paragraphs, first you will develop a topic sentence which is convenient for
classification. After finding a topic to classify, establish the central, unique characteristic of each
category .This is a criterion used for selection, the one main idea that helps you put every thing
into its proper category. For example if you were to classify a box of mixed tools you picked up
at a garage sale, how might you sort them? You could sort by
Type: hammers, saws, screw drivers, nails, screws, wedges, miters, drill bits and so on; thus
“type” could be the central unique characteristic.
Size: bigger pieces of equipment (hammer, saw, miter), smaller tools (screw drivers,
wedges), and tiny pieces used to build other things (nails, screws); thus “size” could be
the central unique characteristic.
You could also sort them by type of metal or weight or age (if you collect antique tools). If,
while you are sorting, you find that something can fit into two categories, then you haven’t
refined your categories well enough, or you have listed traits in one category that actually do not
belong there. You will need to reexamine your traits list.
1. The classifier approaches a body of unorganized material with the intention of
organizing it for some purpose. Different purposes will result in different
classifications. For example, people can be classified according sex, age, income, IQ,
marital status, blood types, and so on. The classifier’s purpose determines how he is
going to classify the material.
2. The purpose determines the principle of selection to be used in deciding which items are to be
placed in which class. The principle of selection must be maintained for all main classes,
though a different principle may be used in going from main classes to subclasses. For
example, after people have been classified by sex, the sex groups may be subdivided into age
groups. Age then becomes the principle of selection in the subgroups.
3. Items are grouped within a class as they are seen to be alike in some characteristic which is
essential to the principle of selection. Thus all words showing change toward narrower
meaning go in one group; all showing change toward wider meaning go in another. The
essential characteristic is what distinguishes one group from another, and is called class
characteristic.
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These days, the spread of deserts across the world is increasing in alarming rate. There are many
reasons for this occurrence. First, the clearing of vegetation cover to get new land for farming
resulted in rapid loss of forests. This depletion of forests degraded wild life and soil. Second, the rapid
growth of population made peoples to push cultivation into areas that were entirely unsuitable for
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agriculture. These activities of man on highly sensitive and delicately balanced ecosystem led to a
progressive decline in the vegetation cover. Third, the pastoral nomads are the other protagonists in
the tragedy for the fact that far more animals are building up than the system can maintain, i.e., the
number of animals is increasing beyond the potential of land. Finally, the progressive destruction of
the third world’s stock of trees for the existing demand for firewood and timber as building material is
accelerating soil erosion and reducing its capacity to feed and employ people. If forests continue to be
depleted in such ways, it is inevitable that the problem aggravates and our globe will be affected by
desertification much more higher than the present.
The diagram, below, show the model cause paragraph is organized. In this diagram you should see that the topic –
desertification is expanding so large - is given in the opening sentence. Notice, too, that the supporting sentences
give the causes for why desertification is expanding.
Effect Causes
(topic sentence) (supporting sentences)
These days, the spread of deserts across the world
is increasing in alarming rate. There is clearing of vegetation cover to get new land for
[There are several reasons for this] farming
These days, the spread of deserts across The rapid growth of population made peoples
the world is increasing in alarming rate. to push cultivation into areas that were
entirely unsuitable for agriculture.
These days, the spread of deserts across The number of animals is increasing beyond
the world is increasing in alarming rate. the potential of land.
These days, the spread of deserts across There is destruction of trees for source of energy and
constructions.
the world is increasing in alarming rate.
Exercise
Write a cause paragraph by using one of the following topics
Causes of abortion
Causes of student failure
Causes of poverty
Causes of richness
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Causes of famousness
Effect Paragraph
Here is an example of a writing topic asking for effects of a particular event.
You will get the details in the following paragraph. Notice that the first sentence identifies the
topic - a storm caused a great damage - and that all the supporting sentences describe the effects
of this phenomenon described in the first sentence. In other words, if the topic sentence
introduces a cause, the supporting sentences all describe effects for the described event in the
topic. The paragraph below illustrates the effect pattern.
The last night storm caused a great damage. The winds blew up to ninety four miles
an hour and it rained very hard. Eucalyptus trees by the river blew over, and the trees
hit the power lines and blacked out the areas for five hours. Before morning, as the
river overflowed its banks, homes were flooded, roofs caved in, and thousands of
families living nearby were forced to flee their homes with whatever belongings they
could gather. Downtown, the main street was flooded; the cars were left stranded in
the bumper-deep water, and even some automobiles floated over the streets.
The diagram below shows how the model effect paragraph is organized. In this diagram you
should see that the topic – a storm caused a great damage - is given in the opening sentence.
Notice, too, that the supporting sentences give the effects of the terrible storm.
Cause Effects
(topic sentence) (supporting sentences)
The last night storm caused a great damage. [There are It knocked down trees.
several effects of this]
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(The last night storm caused a great damage.) It ruined homes and caved in the roofs.
(The last night storm caused a great damage.) It forced people evacuate their homes.
(The last night storm caused a great damage.) It blocked Main Streets.
Cause/Effect Pattern
The writer may wish to develop a combined cause/effect pattern with in the same paragraph. With this type of
paragraph, there is no rule or regularity about which should come first (after the topic sentence). Sometimes the
writer may wish to indicate cause before effect, and other timers he/ she may want to begin with the result or effect.
Sometimes, in this pattern, one cause is followed by several results. And sometimes several causes are followed by a
single result.
Explanations of cause and effects very often use transitions such as the following:
thus reasons leads to
because result brings about
leading to effects therefore
since causes as a result
Here are some other common conjunctions that can be used to express cause and effect:
for this reason since because of +noun phrase
as a result because due to + noun phrase
therefore consequently so
Exercise
If the following topic sentences are developed, they can form cause/ effect paragraphs
Develop one of them into a paragraph indicating both the causes and effects of the topic.
The place where children grow may determine their future.
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How you behave in a society will determine your acceptance in that society.
The way a teacher treats his/her students can have a great effect on students’ life.
REFERENCES
Leggett , Mead , and Charvat (1978)Prentice-Hall Handbook for Writers ( Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey , Ninth
Edition.
Mc Crimmon (1976) writing with a purpose. Sixth Edition. Florida State University.
Needleman , Morris H. (1968) Handbook for Practical Composition, McGraw-Hill Book Company, New York.
Ploeger , Katherine (2000) Simplified Paragraph Skills. NTC / Contemporary Publishing Group. U S A
Ezor, Edwin,and Lewis (1984) From Paragraph to Essay. McGraw-Hill Book Company,
USA.
Hult, Christine and Huckin (1999) The New Century Hand Book, A Viacom Company.
Schiffhorst , Gerald j. (1997) The Short Hand Book for Writers ,McGraw-hill book
Tyner ,Thomas E. (1987)College Writing Basics, Wads Worth Publishing Company,
California.
Wiener, Harvey S. (1984) Creating Composition, Fourth Edition , McGraw-Hill Book Company.
Longan, John (1997) Forth Edition. College Writing Skills with Readings
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SOPHOMORE ENGLISH UNIT 5: DISCOURSE
5. Types of Discourse
The scope of discourse ranges from a paragraph to an extended essay. Traditionally, discourse has been divided in to
the following patterns of development:
•Description,
•Argumentation,
•Narration,
•Exposition
5.1 Description – is a verbal picture of a person, place, or thing. It is the kind of writing which
attempts to appeal to the reader's sense, recreating for him the author's original impression of
the subject being described. It is very much concerned with sensory impressions (sight,
sound, smell, taste, touch). Description can be objective or impressionistic. Description rarely
appears alone in modern writing. It is most often used with narration.
We have special sensory words which are very much concerned with description. Some words
refer to sensory experiences: to what we see, hear, touch, taste and smell. Because these words
call up sensory images, they are particularly effective in description. In the following list, some
words could fit into more than one sensory category.
Touch : chill , clammy , cold , corrugated, grainy, gritty, harsh, jarring, knobby, moist, nubby,
numb, plushy, rough satiny, slimy, slithering, smooth, sting, tingle, tickly, velvety.
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Taste: bland, biting, bitter, nutty, peppery, salty, sour, spicy, sweet, tainted, vinegary, yeasty,
brackish, briny, metallic, minty
Smell: acrid, fetid, greasy, moldy, musky, musty, pungent, putrid, rancid, rank, reek, stench,
sulphurous, woodsy.
Sound: bellow, blare, buzz, chatter, chime, clang, clatter, clink, crackle, crash, creak, gurgle,
purr,ruttle,rustle,screech,snap,splash,squeak,swish,tinkle,whine,whisper,hiss, hum,
murmur, pop.
Sight: blaze bleary, bloody, burnished, chalky, dappled, ebony, flame, flash, flicker, florid,
foggy, gaudy, glare, glitter, glossy, glow, golden, grimy, haze, inky, leaden, lurid, muddy,
roiled, sallow, shadow, smudged, spark, streak, tawny, turbid.
Well-chosen sensory words help a reader to experience what a writer is recording. Notice the use
of such words in this description of what two boys smelled, saw, and heard in a dawn visit to the
circus grounds.
Example 1
And to all these familiar sounds of birds, car ,people, pet animals, … chirps, engine-noise, chatter, barks,… to all
the sharp and thrilling odors of the trains-the smell of cinders, acrid smoke, of musty, rusty freight cars, the clean
pine-board of crated produce, and the smells of fresh stored food-oranges, coffee, tangerines and bacon, ham and
flour and beef-there would be added now, with an unforgettable magic and familiarity, all the strange sounds and
smells of the coming circus….He was looking at the great iron-gray horses, four and six to a team, which would be
plodding along the road of thick white dust to a rattling of chains and traces and the harsh cries of their
drivers….Then, on the circus grounds , the tents were going up already with the magic speed of dreams. All over the
place( which was near the tracks and the only space of flat land in the town that was big enough to hold a circus)…
Example 2
A descriptive paragraph about the delights to be found at Bale National Park in Oromiyya
Region by a former student who wishes to remain anonymous.
Bale’s summer sunshine makes me delightful. I indulge myself under the shade of the
strawberry trees during the summer in Bale National Park in order to bask in its sunshine.
Especially when the wind waves the leaves and the sunlight slides through; it feels like velvet
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patting my body or like a furry cat rubbing me. I like to sit on the bench, which is on the
southern shore of the Wabi River. One day, an old Abyssinian dog sat beside me. Although there
were many adults jogging, children giggling, and squirrels chasing around, the old Abyssinian
was as solid as a rock; he closed his eyes and ears and made his daydream without a pause.
Sometimes, when the sunlight stung his nose, he shifted his body one inch to avoid it, and when
the flies buzzed around his head, he twitched his muscle or his ear to dispel the greedy flies who
shared his sunlight. After absorbing enough energy, he trudged away contentedly. I love to sip
this free tranquilizer during the summer in Bale National Park.
I. Descriptions of People
In order to write an interesting description of somebody we must use suitable nouns and adjectives. When we
describe persons, we are concerned with their physical appearance and with their personality. Certain noun and
adjectives help us to describe the persons accurately. Here are some examples:
Age: baby, toddler, youngster, youth, boy, girl, teenager, man, woman, lady, young man,
young woman, old man, old woman, elder
Parts of the Face: forehead eyes, eyebrows, nose, nostrils, ears, cheeks.
mouth, lips, jaw chin
Parts of the Body: head, neck, shoulders arms lands, legs, feet
Hair: hairstyle, plaits, braids, beard, moustache
Clothes: cloth,fabric;shirt,teeshirt,tie,coat,jacket,trousers,jeans,socks,pullover,sweater;sut
overcoat,raincoat,dress,blouse,skirt,shawl,scarf;shoes,sandals,boots,hat,glasses,
spectacles
Jewellery: Necklace bracelet, ring, earrings, anklet
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Age: young, middle-aged, old, elderly; in his/her early thirties / mid forties / late fifties
etc,
Face: long, round, oval, attractive, beautiful, un-shaven
Hair: long, medium-length, short; straight, curly, wavy; dark, black, blonde, gray, fair,
white, plaited, bald
Body Build: tall, short, fat, plump, over -weight, thin, slim, slender, skinny, under-weight,
broad-shouldered, muscular
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The following example shows how the writer describes his mother. Notice the sensory words
used in the description.
1. This picture of my mother, which was taken fifty years ago, has fascinated me from the
moment I began to study it closely. The young woman in the picture has a face that
resembles my own in many ways. Her face is a bit more oval than mine, but the softly
waving brown hair around it is identical. The small, straight nose is the same model I
was born with. My mother's mouth is closed, yet there is just the slightest hint of a
smile on her full lips. I know that if she had smiled, she would have shown the same
wide grin and down curving "smile lines" that appear in my own snapshots. The most
haunting features in the photo, however, are my mother's eyes. They are exact
duplicates of my own large, dark brown ones. Her brows are plucked into thin lines,
which are like two pencil strokes added to highlight those fine luminous eyes. I've also
carefully studied the clothing and jewelry in the photograph. My mother is wearing a
blouse and skirt that, although the photo was taken many years ago, could easily be
worn today. The blouse is made of heavy eggshell-colored satin and reflects the light in
its folds and hollows. It has a turned-down cowl collar and smocking on the shoulders
and below the collar. The smocking (tiny rows of gathered material) looks hand-done.
The skirt, which covers my mother's calves, is straight and made of light wool or
flannel. My mother is wearing silver drop earrings. They are about two inches long
and roughly shield-shaped. On her left wrist is a matching bracelet. My mother can’t
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find this bracelet now, despite the fact that we spent ours searching through the attic
for it. On the third finger of her left hand is a ring with a large, square-cut stone.
The following example also shows how the writer describes two persons being compared and
contrasted. Notice, too, the sensory words used in the description.
3.I am amazed myself at how little trouble it is living with and liking two such different roommates. Their physical
appearances differ greatly. With small brown eyes and straight black hair to her shoulders, Martha is tall, lean and
statuesque. Mary, on the other hand, is tiny. Under five feet tall, she keeps her blonde hair short and fluffy. Looking out
over a small nose, her large gray eyes are “funny looking,” according to her. “They are all right if you like cats,” she
says grinning .These two girls also have different kinds of interests. Martha likes reading or relaxing quietly in front of
the television set. She likes talking to; she will speak to me for hours about a feature in People Magazine or about a
Marx brother’s film she watched on Channel-4 until dawn. Her voice quivers with excitement. “Just listen to this,” she
will say, her eyes glowing, her warm fingers pressed to my palm to hold my attention. But for Mary the out door life
holds more interest than books or screens. At six each morning, in a bright orange sweat suit, she is jogging merrily
down University Drive, crunching through leaves for her usual four miles. She swims. She plays tennis. She is a terror at
paddleball, smashing shots I have to groan to return. However the most interesting difference between them is their
approach to school work. Martha grows tense before an exam. At her desk a small fluorescent lamp throws a pale light
on her face as she sits for hours glaring nervously at a page in her biology book. She underlines words noisily and
scrawls notes to herself in the margin with a yellow felt pen. Her lips say over and over some key words she wants to
memorize. Because only “A” grades satisfy her, she works tirelessly. Mary, on the contrary, takes everything easy, and
exams are not exception. Sprawled on the red and white couch, she surrounds herself with cola, corn chips, chocolate
bars, apples, and salted nuts…. She jabbers endlessly and jumps up every few minutes to stare out the window, to do a
few sit-ups or to splash herself with spicy cologne. Without much effort or an anxiety, she crams enough data in to her
head to earn grades that keep her happy.
Activities
- Discuss how these descriptive words make your writing more effective.
To be an effective writer, you must be able to effectively describe the objects you are writing
about. Good descriptive passages are ones that cause us to see what the writer sees.
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As shown earlier, descriptive paragraphs are often used to describe what a person looks and acts
like. Read this example descriptive paragraph. (Notice how the descriptive words are used.)Here
is an example of a descriptive paragraph:
I am forty years old, rather tall and I have blue eyes and short black hair. I wear casual clothes
as I teach students in a relaxed atmosphere. I enjoy my job because I get to meet and help so
many different people from all over the world. During my spare time, I like playing tennis which
I play at least three times a week. I also love listening to classical music and I must admit that I
spend a lot of money on buying new CDs! I live in a pretty seaside town on the Italian coast. I
enjoy eating great Italian food and laughing with the likable people who live here.
Written Exercise I
Practice
Ask your friends the same questions as in exercise I and write paragraphs about them.
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Example 1:
My bedroom is very cosy. It is a small room with thick carpeting and light blue walls. Below the
north window is my double bed covered with an imitation of leopard skin bedspread. To the left
of the bed against the wall is a nightstand with a reading lamp, an alarm clock, and a portable
radio. At the foot of the bed is a wooden stand holding my black-and-white TV. Behind the
wooden stand and in front of the closet are three comfortable armchairs. On the east and west
walls posters of famous historical and geographical sites are plastered. The holy cross bearing
the crucifixion of Christ is hung to the wall along side the portrait of Virgin Mary embracing
infant Christ...
Example 2
The front of my apartment building is quite attractive. Three tall, full poplar trees grow beside
the sidewalk and shade the small yard. The east half of the yard is enclosed by a white wrought-
iron fence and inside the fenced area is a round, sunken cement wading pool, a redwood picnic
table with attached benches, and a built-in used brick barbecue pit. The west half of the yard is a
manicured bluegrass lawn bordered with blue and yellow pansies. Below the front windows of
the building is a beautiful rose garden blooming with red, white, yellow flowers. A cobblestone
walkway separates the rose garden from the yard area. The front of the two story-building has a
fresh coat of light tan paint with dark brown doors and matching window trim. The sloping red-
tile roof overhangs the building a couple of feet and adds to the Spanish style. The entire area is
clean, colorful, and nicely laid out.
Example 3
My salon is my favorite room in the house. As I stand at the door looking in , the first thing I see
on the far side of the room is a yellow wall, its soft color framing a computer print out picture of
my boyfriend Solomon and me. In front of the door, the comfortable arm chairs are placed and,
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to the left, my night table, holding a beige telephone, a small lamp, and a radio alarm clock.
Behind the night table fresh air from my window gently rustles the yellow and green curtails
back and fourth. A toy red snack lying on top of the curtail rod smiles down at me. When I pull
the door behind me, it squeaks. I feel a burst of air sailing through, caring with it the scent of
lemon soup from the bathroom down the hall. As I return to examine the wall where the door is,
I see my twelve- drawer bureau. The polished mahogany glistens, showing me my reflection. To
protect the wood from scratches, a white dresser scarf sits on top in a neat square. On top of it
are a black and white television set, a wooden jewelry box, three bottles of perfume, a baby
picture of me in a silver frame. Hanging on the wall beside my dresser is a colander with large
black numbers. For October there is a picture of a brown and white kitten playing gently with a
ball of wool. When I hear a hissing sound, I realize that the steam is coming up; in the corner
below the calendar my lavender –painted radiator clamors for attention. Above it the adjacent
wall are three book shelves. The top shelf holds some dusty hard cover novels and my history
books on the civil war ; the middle shelf holds the paper back novels , plays and biographies I
have collected over the years : and the bottom shelf supports stacks of disco record albums ,
copies of Ebony, People, and TV guide, loose papers, and all my samples of lipstick and nail
polish .after I select a book from one of the five shelves, pull of my socks and shoes, and run my
toes through the soft shag carpet, I lie down on the sofa to enjoy my peaceful salon .
- Write a paragraph describing a beautiful location you have been to at some time, entitled
"My Favorite Place" (don’t forget using descriptive words, adjectives, mood, feeling,)
The following words can help you to write a good description paragraph:
Helper Words:
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Location
in
Example: Most of Ethiopia’s manufacturing companies are located in Addis Ababa and
Akaki.
above
Example: Addis Ababa is eight thousand feet above sea-level
outside
Example: Many new manufacturing are being built outside the city.
beside
Example: Akaki is located beside Addis Ababa
near
Example: Most of the trade centers of the companies are located near Mercato
Properties
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size
Example: Giraffes are big in size.
colour
Example: Giraffes have a tan coat with brown blotches.
shape
Example: Giraffes have a special shape, having a very long neck and legs and short horns.
purpose
Example: The purpose of the giraffe’s long legs is to run fast ; a walking giraffe takes
Measurement
Height
Example: The height of an adult male giraffe is usually about 5.3 m tall.
length
Example: The length of the heart of an adult giraffe is over 60 cm.
width
Example: The width of a giraffe's head is very narrow.
mass / weight
Example: Giraffes weigh up to 1,350 kg.
speed
Example: Giraffes run at a speed of 55 km per hour.
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Analogy
is like
Example: A giraffe is like camels in shape.
resembles
Example: A giraffe resembles camels in shape.
Notice how the above sentences about giraffe are organized to form a descriptive discourse.
Giraffes are the tallest of all land animals. A walking giraffe takes steps that are 4.5 meters long.
The long legs of giraffes make them good runners, too. They can easily run at a speed of 55 km
an hour. Giraffes live in Africa. But they are only found in certain parts of the continent. You
will almost never see them in deserts or thick forests. Giraffes are plant-eaters, or herbivores.
Their favorite food is the leaves of trees. For this reason, they like to live where there are a lot of
trees. But they almost like to be sure that they can run away when a lion comes. So they stay out
of thick forests. Everything about a giraffe is big. Adult male giraffes are usually about 5.3
meters tall and they can weigh as much as 1,350 kilograms. The heart of an adult giraffe can be
over 60 centimeters long. It can pump 75 liters of blood every minute. Giraffes have four
stomachs and they eat about 35 kilograms of food a day. When a giraffe drinks, it can drink up to
40 liters of water at one time. The neck of a giraffe can be 2 meters long. But a giraffe has the
same number of neck bones as you do—only seven!
Assignment 3
Choose a picture from a magazine/ book/newspaper/ poster etc. Then write a paragraph
describing what is in the picture. ( the picture might be of a person ,an animal, or a place.)
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writes argumentation, his main purpose is to convince his reader about some issue, to
persuade his reader to take some action. The writer presumes that he and his readers hold
different position on a subject. The writer attempts to convince readers through logical
reasoning. This argumentation is a process of reasoning in which a series of facts and
judgments are arranged to establish a conclusion.
Look at the following model argumentative paragraphs, and notice how they are organized.
Example 1:
Main premise: The government should introduce tighter gun controls
Jack Spring thinks that everyone should have the right to own a gun but I don't agree
with him. People like him think that the government is infringing our democratic rights
when it restricts gun ownership. They think that most people who own guns are
responsible citizens who keep the guns for sport and recreation. They also think that
the police are unable to stop violent crime and we need guns to protect ourselves. But I
think he's wrong. I agree with Josephine Bluff who thinks that guns increase the
amount of violent crime in the community. I also think that human life is worth more
than sporting shooters right to go shooting on the weekend. And I also think that many
of the guns that are kept around the house end being used in violent domestic disputes
or teenage suicides.
Example 2:
University Fees
Main premise: Students should have to pay fees for university courses
Joan Sprat (1989:13) argues that the government should provide free university
education because such education benefits the whole community. She asserts that the
skills that students learn at university are important for the future social and economic
development of our nation. Therefore, so this argument goes, the government should
invest money in education as it does with other vital resources. According to this
argument, when students are forced to pay for their education themselves fewer of
them will enrol in higher education courses. However, as John Dawkins (1988:1)
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explains the government is able to invest the money it gets back into the higher
education system so that overall quality is improved. Furthermore, there is money to
fund more places for students so that in the future we will not have the shortage of
places we had in the past. Moreover, it is unreasonable to expect taxpayers to pay for
students' education when those students get well-paid professional jobs after they
graduate.
Example 3:
Computer games have been popular for decades now and many households have
them. However, it can be seen that playing these games causes social, educational,
and personal problems of several kinds both to youngsters and society. Firstly,
youngsters who spend a great deal of time in front of a computer screen are not
studying, playing sport, socializing or learning about life. The skills which they need
in order to interact with others and succeed in the real world are not being nurtured.
Moreover, studies have shown that this generation of young males is actually
growing less than previous generations due to lack of exercise. Following from this,
they are more likely to be overweight and less healthy, so more prone to diseases
such as diabetes. In addition, the games themselves are often quite violent and
dangerously sexist. For example, there are games which show graphic fighting
scenes where the most brutal is most applauded. Women are shown as either sexy,
but weak, or as improbable amazons. Violence against women is often part of these
games which encourage misogynistic behavior. The language tends to be violent and
sexist which further adds to the problems of the lack of interaction and social skills. It
is easy to imagine the effects of such games on young minds. If we wish children to
grow up to become well adjusted members of society, these games should be more
tightly controlled.
The art of argumentation is not an easy skill to acquire. Many people might think that if one simply has an opinion,
one can argue it effectively, and these folks are always surprised when others don't agree with them because their
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logic seems so correct. Additionally, writers of argumentation often forget that their primary purpose in an argument
is to "win" it--to sway the reader to accept their point of view. It is easy to name call, easy to ignore the point of
view or research of others, and extremely easy to accept one's own opinion as gospel, even if the writer has not
checked his or her premise in a couple of years, or, as is the case for many young writers, never questioned the
beliefs inherited from others.
Want to know what you think about something? Then write an argumentative paragraph. To be fair, however, you'll
find that one of the first things you must do is having prior knowledge on the issue. When you pick a topic, you
should avoid writing about issues that cannot be won, no matter how strongly you might feel about them. The five
hottest topics of our time seem to be gun control, abortion, capital punishment, freedom of speech, and probably the
most recent, euthanasia, or the right to die. If possible, avoid writing about these topics because they are either
impossible to "win," or because your audience is probably sick of reading about them and knows all the pros and
cons by heart (this could put you at a serious disadvantage) if the audience has much knowledge about it. The topics
may be fine reading material, however, because most people are somewhat aware of the problems and can then
concentrate on understanding the method of argument itself. But care should be taken that if you read one side, you
also read the other. Far too many individuals only read the side that they already believe in. These issues cannot be
won for good reason: each touches on matters of faith and beliefs that for many people are unshakable and deeply
private.
1. So, what do you write about? Pick a well-defined, controversial issue. (Spend some time with
the latest copies of several news magazines, watch TV, or listen to National Public Radio to
generate ideas.) Readers should understand what the issue is and what is at stake. The issue must
be arguable, as noted above. After stating your thesis, you will need to discuss the issue in depth
so that your reader will understand the problem fully.
2. A clear position should be taken by the writer. In your thesis sentence, state what your position is. You do not
need to say: "I believe that we should financially support the space station." Using the first person weakens your
argument. Say "Funding for the space station is imperative to maintain America's competitive edge in the global
economy." The thesis can be modified elsewhere in the essay if you need to qualify your position, but avoid hedging
in your thesis.
3. Your argument should be convincing. An argumentative essay does not merely assert an opinion; it presents an
argument, and that argument must be backed up by data that persuades readers that the opinion is valid. This data
consists of facts, statistics, the testimony of others through personal interviews and questionnaires or through articles
and books, and examples. The writer of an argumentative essay should seek to use educated sources that are
nonbiased, and to use them fairly. It is therefore best to avoid using hate groups as a source, although you can use
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them briefly as an example of the seriousness of the problem. Talk shows fall into the same category as they are
frequently opinionated or untrue.
4. Your premises should be reasonable. Assume that your reader will disagree with you or be skeptical. It is
important, therefore, that your premises be reasonable, professional, and trustworthy. By anticipating objections and
making concessions, you inspire confidence and show your good will.
5. Once your paper has been written, check every quotation in it for accuracy. Your reader may require that every
quotation should be directly copied and included with what you turn in. All quoted matter should be clearly marked
on the copy.
In other words, you can follow the following guidelines to write your argumentative essays.
Search for a topic which interests you (perhaps in your major field). Try to come up with
something fairly controversial, but avoid subjects that have been overdone (abortion,
capital punishment).
After doing the appropriate pre-writing and organizing activities, write a draft which
supports a thesis or conclusion of your own. Be sure it is an arguable one so that you
can clearly choose one side. At this point some research may be necessary (library,
interviews of experts, polls, surveys, experiments, etc.) to find data to support your
conclusion more strongly than you can from your own background knowledge.
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Revise and edit, and be sure to apply the critical process to your argument to be
certain you have not committed any errors in reasoning or included any fallacies for
which you would criticize some other writer (see the handout
EVALUATION SHEET
After you have written your argumentative discourse, you should check whether you have written it effectively or
not. To check you’re the effectiveness of discourse, you can use the following checklist.
If you're lucky, your friends trust you. Your readers, however, probably do not know you well enough to
trust you (or distrust you) as a person. They will have to focus on the credibility of your ideas, not on the
fact that you are a kind-hearted soul who always tracks down the owner of the extra quarter you found in
the soda machine.
Logic is the tool writers use to establish their credibility with readers. When a writer bases an idea or
proposal on weak logic, we say that the writer has committed a logical fallacy. (Most of us, by the way,
build fallacies into our writing--unwittingly, of course--as we struggle to get that first draft on paper.
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Writing is always a process of trial and error.) Rhetorically speaking, logical fallacies are the equivalent of
thin ice. When this ice cracks, your argument is likely to fall through.
A suggestion, then (no . . . actually, this is a requirement of the course): Watch for the following fallacies in
your own writing. And once you find them, do your best to get rid of them.
1. HASTY GENERALIZATIONS are based on atypical, irrelevant, or inaccurate evidence.
Example: Of course our students are physically fit; just look at the success of our
sports teams this year.
2. FAULTY CAUSE AND EFFECT (POST HOC) is the result of assuming that because B follows A, A
must be the cause of B.
Example: Tourism in this city started to decline right after Mayor Scott was
elected. To save our tourist industry, let's replace her now!
3. REDUCTIVE REASONING reduces a complex effect to a single cause.
Example: People who want to be healthy should eat turnips. My Aunt Alice loved
turnips, and she lived to be ninety-four.
4. FALSE ANALOGIES occur when writers overlook the fact that two things being compared are more
different than they are similar.
Example: Why am I required to take certain courses before I can graduate from
this school? No one requires me to buy certain groceries before I can leave the
supermarket.
5. BEGGING (AVOIDING) THE QUESTION occurs when a writer assumes as true the very point he or
she is arguing.
6. CIRCULAR REASONING occurs when the argument merely restates the conclusion it was meant to
support.
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7. EQUIVOCATION involves using a term in a completely different way than one's opponent uses it.
8. AD HOMINEM ARGUMENTS attack the opponent rather than his or her argument. (Ad hominem
literally means "against the person.")
Example: Senator Jones' bill on gun control should not be taken seriously; after
all, this is the same man who has had at least five extramarital affairs.
9. FALSE EITHER/OR ARGUMENTS assume that only two alternatives exist in a given situation.
Example: The case is clear: either we support the death penalty or we allow crime
to run rampant.
10. BAND WAGON APPEALS suggest that readers should accept something because it is popular; that
is, everyone else has "hopped on the bandwagon."
Example: A recent poll showed that seventy percent of the American public
believes emissions requirements on automobiles have gone too far; therefore,
these laws are unreasonable and should be repealed.
11.. NON SEQUITURS occur when writers fail to show clear connections between their premise (starting
point) and conclusion. (Non sequitur literally means "it does not follow.")
Example: Maria loved college, so I'm sure she will make an excellent teacher.
POINTS TO REMEMBER ABOUT THESE LOGICAL FALLACIES:
* Most of the conclusions included in the examples above could be argued. The problem is that the
reasoning provided in these examples is insufficient or not credible.
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* The best way to "smoke out" unsound reasoning in your own writing is to ask yourself what your
argument takes for granted. Remove those assumptions, then rebuild your argument using stronger
support--if such support exists.
Narration - is a discourse in which a writer tells the story of something that happened. It is concerned with
describing a series of events, happenings or incidents which may be either real or imaginary that lead to a
conclusion. It is the kind of writing most people habitually turn to recreation, it is found in short stories and
novels as well as in news stories and essays. Rarely does narrative writing occur in pure form; most often it
includes description and exposition for additional interest. It usually involves some kind of conflict, its
resolution and conclusion.
Once you get the basic story down, then you can begin turning it into a paragraph. If you feel that you lack life
experience, then you may choose to write about someone else or write about an observation you've made about a
recent event. You could write about your children, your parents, or your favorite sport or hobby. The important
aspect to remember is that you should have a story. In a successful narrative paragraph, the author usually makes
a point.
Features
1. The story should have an introduction that clearly indicates what kind of narrative
essay it is (an event or recurring activity, a personal experience, or an observation), and it
should have a conclusion that makes a point.
2. The essay should include anecdotes. The author should describe the person, the scene,
or the event in some detail. It's okay to include dialogue as long as you know how to
punctuate it correctly and as long as you avoid using too much.
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3. The occasion or person described must be suggestive in that your description and
thoughts lead the reader to reflect on the human experience. For instance, I read an
excellent student essay that told the story of a young woman forced to shoot several
wolves that were attacking her cattle. She told her story and included the inner struggle
she faced as she made the choice of saving the cattle or saving the wolves. She shot the
wolves, but learned that whatever her choice had been, she would not have been
comfortable with it. One of life's lessons is that sometimes there is no right choice, and
that was the point of the essay.
4. The point of view in narrative essays is usually first person. The use of "I" invites your
readers into an intimate discussion.
5. The writing in your essay should be lively and show some style. Try to describe ideas
and events in new and different ways. Avoid using clichés. Again, get the basic story
down, get it organized, and in your final editing process, work on word choice.
There is very little mystery to writing the personal narrative paragraph. There is no proper topic for such an essay.
An essay can be about a variety of personal experiences. You, the writer, have the right to say what you want about
your personal experience. You can write about anything – My child hood, My old neighbors you spent the past with,
the harrowing experience of being stuck in an elevator, the best Christmas you ever had, the worst day of your life.
No topic or subject is off-limits; therefore there are endless opportunities to write an essay about your personal,
point-of-view of what happened. Often the reason behind wanting to write a personal paragraph is unclear. Once the
writing begins and the events are recorded and recounted it becomes clear that the writer is searching to find the
meaning, the universal truth, the lesson learned from the experience. When writing, rewriting and good editing
coalesce, a personal narrative essay becomes a beautiful thing. It shows how the past or a memory’s significance
affects the present or even the future.
We all have stories to tell. But facing a blank page is intimidating. Knowing where to begin becomes a real
dilemma. A good place to start is with the word I. Write I was, I saw, I did, I went, I cried, I screamed, I took for
granted. I is an empowering word. Once you write it on the page it empowers you to tell your story. That’s exactly
what you are going to do next. Tell the story. Get it all out. Don’t worry about how many times I appear in the text.
Don’t worry how scattered and unfocused thoughts are. Write however your mind tells you to write. This style is
often called freewheeling writing or stream of consciousness. Once the story is all down on paper you will go back
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and begin to shape the paragraph into a form that says exactly what you want it to say about your experience. If
you’re discouraged over what you’ve written, back away from it. Let it rest. Take a walk. Do something that
distracts your mind from writing the paragraph. Many writers find that even while doing something other than
writing, their writing mind continues to work out what needs to be said and continues to uncover the multi-layered
associations and voices of what they’re writing about.
Personal narrative paragraphs are essentially non-fiction stories, ones that are neatly arranged like a road map that
take the reader from point A to point B to point C. In life, and in our own personal experience, things aren’t so
straightforward as A-B-C. Characters, facts, places, conversations and reporting what happened, where you went,
what you saw and what you did isn’t always so neatly pulled together. That is your job, as the writer, to pull together
all the elements so they bring the reader to the universal truth, the lesson learned or insight gained in your
experience. How do you do this? Through re-writing and re-writing.
Each time you redo the story more will be revealed to you. You will get “in touch” with the universal truth. Every
rewrite of the story will lead you to the aha! Once you get the aha! the next rewrite will show dramatic
improvement. You will be able to arrange events into a chronological sequence that best suits the aha!. When you
know the aha! create events, think up examples to better illustrate the theme of your essay. Use the senses when
describing anything. Example, …It was a stellar day. The air had a salty tang to it as it blew off the ocean. Little
white caps broke not more than twenty feet out then rushed to meet the shore. Above me sea gulls screeched and
circled in a cloudless blue sky. The sun was in its Spring zenith…. The more descriptive language you use, the more
you will place the reader right there in the experience with you. Colorful or hard-driving language are the tools of
the paragraphist.
paragraph writing forces you to shape your experience until it can be fully understood by others. Use every tool
available in the writing craft. Construct dialogue, use metaphors but most importantly, use language with a wide
breadth of sensory detail. If you find yourself getting lost, stop writing. Start reading other essays. Every issue of
Reader’s Digest always has at least two. Read eight back issues of a magazine with personal narrative essays in their
content. By osmosis, you’ll get the feel of how essays are constructed. Go back and do the rework on yours. Include
dialogue, include examples that best support or illustrate the aha! of the experience you’re writing about. Beef up the
description of a character. Give them succinct, meaningful dialogue that pushes the reader closer and closer to the
aha! of your essay.
The next step is to get feedback on what you have written. If someone close to you or someone really intimate with
the experience you’ve written about says, “Hey, that’s not the way it happened,” don’t worry. Little white lies are
serving to drive the aha! of the experience into the mind of the reader. Your truth is embedded in your writing. To
enable the reader to visualize or grasp the concept, little white lies are a necessity. Listen to the responses of readers,
then go back a rewrite the portions that were unclear to the reader.
Next, have someone read the essay aloud to you or you read it aloud into a tape recorder.
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Listen to the flow of words. Listen to where the reader stumbles. Listen where pauses fall. Listen to where the reader
runs out of breath. These are all clues as to where more refining or tweaking need to be done. Go back and do it!
You are close to sitting back in the chair and saying, “Yes! This is exactly what I wanted to say about what I
experienced.” It is a beautiful feeling. Work to achieve it.
D. Begin rewriting. Shaping events in a way to best suit what you want to say.
G. Use language that is full of words that tap into the senses.
I. Re-write.
L. Grin from ear-to-ear when everything on the page reveals the aha! in the experience perfectly.
As one of the modes of writing, the narrative offers writers a chance to think and write about themselves, to explain
how their experiences lead to some important realization or conclusion about their lives or about the world in
general. Each of us has memories of times that have been meaningful, of times that have taught us lessons about
ourselves or others. Through the narrative essay, we have the chance to record those experiences as the supporting
evidence to substantiate our new understanding.
Two crucial first steps in planning a narrative essay are selecting an incident worthy of writing about and finding the
central, relevant, salient point in that incident. To do this, writers might ask themselves what about the incident
provided new insights or awareness primarily for themselves (but possibly for others too). Finally, writers
incorporate details which will make the incident real for readers.
Also, a narrative paragraph can be an effective, interesting way to integrate significant background information
into a variety of different essay types. Even if the essay as a whole primarily uses another method of development,
the narrative paragraph can be incorporated into an essay to support a topic sentence in a particular paragraph and to
establish a bit of ethical appeal at the same time. I am thinking here of how effectively former Presidents Ronald
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Reagan and Bill Clinton were at incorporating some small personal narratives into speeches, press conferences, or
interviews. Both might be talking about a larger subject, say the economy, and both would slip in a small aside about
a conversation they had had with a local merchant, who taught them how important it was to push the particular
economic program that the President was advocating in the larger speech. What's more, such narrative additions can
help you as the writer create ethical appeal with your audience: the readers often look at such personal narrative
favorably, seeing them as a touch of "realism" in an otherwise dry, esoteric, or abstract discussion.
However, whether you use narrative as the rhetorical mode of discourse as a whole or just of a single paragraph
within a discourse, there are some principles and conventions of the narrative that readers commonly expect.
Once you have chosen your subject, you should keep two principles in mind.
1. Find a generalization which the story supports. This is crucial, and perhaps the defining characteristic
between a narrative-as-story and a narrative-as-paragraph. The generalization will be the thesis of your
paragraph, will say something that the story itself then illuminates or shows to be true. This generalization
can be quite personal; it does not have to capture a truth about humanity as a whole or about the essence of
the human condition. It simply needs to capture a truth about your life and use the story, the narrative
experience, to illustrate its importance to you. In this way, it then has meaning to the readers as well.
Remember that ultimately you are writing an paragraph, not simply telling a story.
2. Remember to incorporate details of your story that not only illuminate your thesis, but also engage your
readers' imagination and make the story "real" for them as well. On the Specific and Concrete Detail page, I
have some advice about how you can do this.
1. Narratives are generally written in the first person singular, i.e., I. However, third person (he, she, or it) can
also be used. Which person you use most often is a function of whose perspective is being captured in the
narrative. If it's your story, use I; if it's a story about what happened to a friend, use she. That's logical and
simple.
Yet, writers can and do play with perspective for stylistic effect. For example, Jeffrey Zeldman writes his
web blog in the first person plural, using we to refer to himself. (This is a device often called the "royal we"
since a former British monarch had a propensity for referring to herself in the first person plural, as in "We
are not amused." This effect helps Zeldman create a distinctive narrative voice, at once a bit humorous and
friendly, at the same time.
However, be consistent. If you begin your narrative in the first person singular, say, use that throughout.
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2. Narratives rely on concrete, specific details to make their point. These details should create a unified,
dominant impression. Again, see specific details for more information.
3. Narratives, as stories, should include these story conventions: a plot (so tell your readers what is
happening), including setting and characters; a climax (a peak experience often leading to the thesis, the
important realization); and an ending (explaining how the incident resolved itself, also alluding to how the
narrative's thesis comes to it full realization).
4. Speaking of narrators, although the first or third person singular is the most common narrative voice in a
narrative essay, other possibilities exist as well. Consider using interpolated tale (a "twice told tale") to add
some flair. An interpolated tale, used by the likes of none other Charles Dickens and Joseph Conrad, are
stories within stories, where the character in one story goes on to tell a story that illuminates and adds
meaning to the larger story as well. It's a tricky effect to pull off, but a nice effect when used well.
5. Speaking of plot, remember that most stories follow a simple time line in laying out the
narrative. Chronological order is the rule. So feel free to break that rule, when
appropriate, if you can think of a way use a different time order to enhance your story.
For example, flashbacks are a wonderful device to merge the present and the past all at
once.
6. Speaking of characters, it is often true that the most memorable characters are those who have flaws. So
feel to use stories that reveal human weakness as well.
The first important thing to remember about a narrative paragraph is that it tells a story. The
author may write about
The second important thing about a narrative essay is that the story should have a point. In the
final paragraph, the author should come to an important conclusion about the experience that has
just been described.
Notes:
1. The sample paragraph begins with a general statement, "Learning something new
can be a scary experience." This statement introduces the subject of the essay, which is
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a particular learning experience that the author had. The use of "I" in the essay
indicates that what is being described is a personal experience.
2. The paragraph is essentially a story about something that happened. The author
gives sufficient details about the people, place, and events so that the reader gets a
clear idea of how the author feels about them. In the essay, the author "stood timidly"
and the teacher "smiled" and was "patient." These words indicate the author's fears
and the sense of security provided by the teacher who helped the author get over her
fear.
3. In the final sentence of the paragraph, the author reflects on the larger meaning or
importance of the experience described. The author concludes that learning to swim
has helped her to feel more confident about herself in other new situations. The idea
that self-confidence comes from conquering your fears is something that all people
can relate to. This is the point of the story.
4. The paragraph is well-organized. After the introduction, the author describes the
experience as it happened in time -- going to the pool the first day, having the first
lesson, and the result of the subsequent lessons. The author might have chosen,
however, to talk about the things she learned in order of their importance or difficulty.
5. The writing in a paragraph should be lively and interesting. Try to engage the
reader's interest by adding details or personal observations. Sharing personal thoughts
and details invites the reader into author's world and makes the story more personal
and more interesting.
NOTE:
Since a narrative relies on personal experiences, it often is in the form of a story. When the
writer uses this technique, he or she must be sure to include all the conventions of storytelling:
plot, character, setting, climax, and ending. It is usually filled with details that are carefully
selected to explain, support, or embellish the story. All of the details relate to the main point the
writer is attempting to make.
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Example 1
Senait is a very determined woman who gets what she wants. When she was forty-eight
years old, she went to college for the first time. She received a bachelor’s degree in
science in four years. At age fifty-two, she entered medical school, and she was the oldest
student in her class. She spent six years in medical school and finished in the top twenty-
five percent of her class. At fifty-eight, she began interning in the Black Lion Hospital
working ten-hour shifts in the emergency ward. When she completed her internship, she
stayed on in the emergency ward as a fully licensed physician. This was the most thrilling
achievement of her life. She worked at Menelik Hospital for three years and then opened
a higher clinic in her hometown of Awassa. She practiced medicine until she was
seventy- five years old. And she is a truly remarkable person.
Example 2
When I was about five years old, I remember doing a lot of exciting things. We had a
large mango trees growing behind our house, and my sister and I climbed them in the
summer. One time I fell out of one of the trees and landed on my head, but I was not
badly hurt. We also played baseball in the backyard with the neighbor kids, and I
remember we used my mother’s dishes for home plate and the bases. We rode our bikes
all over the north end of the town, and we raced through the alleys after a train,
splattering water and mud to each other. The high school was only a block away, so we
walked there in the summer, jumped the fence, and skated around the cement corridors
until a custodian chased us out. Finally, there was a big vacant lot beside our house
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where we played cowboys and country men almost every Saturday. It seems like I did
nothing but play when I was young.
Brief Summary of how to write a Narrative Discourse:
Purpose: The narrative paragraph tells about one main incident or happening. The author brings the incident to life
so the reader shares the experience. It should be written in logical order. It describes what a person does over a
period of time.
Have a topic sentence that arouses the reader's interest. You can describe a scene or
introduce characters.
Build your paragraph around one main incident. Here is where your action takes place.
Write the event in the order that it occurred. Do not skip around.
Your ending should satisfy your reader's expectations. Bring your paragraph to a close.
Signal Words and Phrases:
after while, a little later, at the same time, during the morning, later that night
Read the following narrative paragraphs, notice how words like 'later' are used to connect what happens.
1. Yesterday evening I got home from school around 4 o'clock. My mother had dinner prepared which we ate as
soon as Dad came home from work. After eating, I helped mother clear the table and do the dishes. After we got the
kitchen cleaned, I had to sit and do my homework. Mother always says, "No television until your homework is
done". I finally got my math finished, so I went into the family room and turned on the television. I was watching
American Idol, when the phone rang. It was my best friend, Amy. I talked to her for awhile then it was time for bed.
I put on my pajamas and turned on my favorite cd. I finally started to get sleepy around 9:30. The next thing I knew,
mother was calling me to get ready for school.
2. Yesterday evening I got home from work at 6 o'clock. My wife had prepared dinner which we
ate immediately. After I had cleaned up the kitchen, we watched TV for about an hour. Then we
got ready to go out with some friends. Our friends arrived at about 9 o'clock and we chatted for
a while. Later we decided to visit a jazz club and listen to some music. We really enjoyed
ourselves and stayed late. We finally left at one o'clock in the morning.
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3. My name is Haile Belay. I am 65 years old. I was born in south Gondar, and lived there until I
was 10 years old. Then I moved to Addis Ababa with my parents and three older brothers. In my
younger years, I had many different jobs. I worked hard and saved my money. By 1978 I had
saved enough money to start my own retail business. The business was successful, and I retired
in 1992. My hobbies are studying the stock market and playing “kirar”. I have seen and done a
lot in my long life. I am a lucky and happy man.
Written Exercise I
Try to write a number of similar paragraphs about what you did last weekend, on your last
holiday, etc.
Think about your high school life, and the things you used to do. Write a story about the days, months and years you
spent with your teachers, classmates, and friends.
As it is mentioned above expository paragraph frames provide a structure for retelling information presented in
expository text. They are based on the principle that information in exposition is structured in a way that is logical
and serves to make the information clear to the reader. In effect, the organizational structure-- the composition-- of
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the text provides the structure for its comprehension. If this is to be true, however, the student needs to be familiar
with the various structures that authors employ and to have practice in utilizing those same structures in
comprehension. The purpose of expository paragraph frames is to teach students the structures of text they can
expect to encounter in what they have to read.
There are five basic ways in which authors may choose to organize information in expository text:
4. Comparison/contrast-- in which the similarities and differences in two or more things are
presented;
Using a procedure such as paired reading, students are first asked to read and retell the selection they are studying.
Meanwhile, the teacher will have created a paragraph frame for the text that students can work together to complete.
The frame is made of a series of incomplete sentences (or sentence starters) that the students can complete by using
information from the text. The resulting paragraph should summarize (and simplify, where possible) the original
passage.
For example, consider the following introductory paragraph from Microsoft’s Encarta, a multimedia encyclopedia;
provides information about and explains how the body works: The Circulatory System
Blood from the entire body is transported to the right auricle through two
large veins: the superior vena cava and the inferior vena cava. When the
right auricle contracts, it forces the blood through an opening into the right
ventricle. Contraction of this ventricle drives the blood to the lungs. Blood is
prevented from returning into the auricle by the tricuspid valve, which
completely closes during contraction of the ventricle. In its passage through
the lungs, the blood is oxygenated, that is, saturated with oxygen; it is then
brought back to the heart by the four pulmonary veins, which enter the left
auricle. When this chamber contracts, blood is forced into the left ventricle
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and thence by ventricular contraction into the aorta. The bicuspid, or mitral,
valve prevents the blood from flowing back into the auricle, and the semi-
lunar valves at the beginning of the aorta stop it from flowing back into the
ventricle. Similar valves are present in the pulmonary artery.
REFERENCES
Tyler, Robin (2001) English for Ethiopia. Secondary English Course. Grade 11- Students’ Book 1. EMPDE.
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