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57 Killer Conversation Starters

So You Can Start A

Conversation With Anyone,

Anytime

How can you have memorable conversation with everyone you meet? Here
are 57 amazing conversation starters so you can start a great conversation
with anyone.

Table of Contents

1. Conversation Starters for Kids

2. Funny Conversation Starters

3. Calendar Speci c Conversation Starters

4. Birthday Party Conversation Starters

5. Tinder, Bumble and Other Dating Conversation Starters

How can you have dazzling conversations with everyone you meet? I have a few
tips and tricks to using easy conversation starters that lead to amazing and
memorable conversations.

×
A good conversation starter topic can make a normal conversation great. I have
broken down this post into different types of conversational situations you might
find yourself in. These conversation starters can help spark interesting, deep
and memorable conversation with anyone.

Conversation Starters for Any

Situation

Let’s start with some killer conversation openers. These are great for simply
opening a conversation with someone new or someone you haven’t seen in a while.
And they’re far more interesting than the standard “Where are you from?” and
“what do you do?” those are so boring. Try these instead.

1. Tell me about you. This is a great one because it invites the other

person to tell you something that they want to share. If they want to tell

you about their job, they can. If they want to tell you about their kids,

they can. And it’s a great way to know what’s at the top of someone’s

mind.

2. Working on anything exciting lately? This is my alternative to “what

do you do?” Asking if someone is working on anything exciting helps

the other person talk about something good in their life, as opposed to

just giving you a boring update.

3. What’s your story? This is an interesting conversation starter because

it invites someone to tell you a story about them, and you never know

what exciting thing they might tell you.

4. What personal passion project are you working on right now? This is
×
one of my favorites. You never know what secret side hustle someone
 has. I love asking this one to people I already know in one context, like

work, but would love to know more about them personally.

5. How do you know the host? This one can be modi ed to any kind of

event. If you are at a party, hopefully you both have the host in common.

If you are at a networking or work event, you can modify it to “How

long have you been a part of this organization?”

6. What was the highlight of your day today? This is a nice alternative to

asking “how are you?” and it gets more interesting answers.

7. What was the highlight of your week? This is a great one to ask

instead of the standard question “How are you?” or “How’s it going?” It

helps people share a positive story instead of just giving an autopilot

answer of “Fine” or “Good.”

8. Have you been to an event like this before? This one can be modi ed

for most types of events, from birthday parties (did you come last

year?) to networking events (do you come every month?).

9. What was the high-point and low-point of your day so far? This one is

great if you have a talker. If you are speaking with an extrovert, asking

questions for them to ruminate and expand on will tickle their fancy.

Extroverts love this question.

10. Has this been a busy time for you? I don’t always like to ask people

about being busy, but I use this conversation starter if someone seems

distracted or not engaged. Sometimes acknowledging their busy-ness

can hook them in.

11. How’s that drink / appetizer / artwork / game? One of my favorite

context cues is asking about whatever someone is holding or doing. Ask

them about their wine. Ask them if they like the artwork they are

looking at. Ask them if the food is good. These are very easy openers.

12. Having fun? A really easy cold approach opener is to look for someone

who is by themself, but looks like they are having an okay time. It’s easy

to sit next to someone at a table, or stand next to someone at the bar

and simply ask, “Having a good time?” or “Enjoying yourself?” It’s a

nicer opener than just “How are you?”

Keep the Conversation Going

Okay, those are my twelve killer openers. How about getting more personal? My
next set of conversation starters are to help you continue the conversation.

13. What are you doing this weekend? Ever had that awkward lull in a

conversation? This conversation starter is always welcome. And, if it is a

Monday or Tuesday, you can modify it to ask “Did you do anything fun

this past weekend?” Sometimes, I also try “What’s your favorite thing
×
to do on the weekends?”
14. What are your favorite restaurants around here? I almost always ask

for personal recommendations. They make great conversation starters.

Why? I always get great tips! And if someone doesn’t have an answer

because they are new to a city, you can talk about where they came

from. Win-win!

15. Keeping up with __sport / tv show / news__ recently? If you are up to

date on news or sports, you could also ask your partner if they keep up

as well. If so, great, you have a lot in common. If not, you can tell them

about it!

16. Can you recommend any unique cocktails / appetizers / desserts

here? Another great way to get recommendations is asking what to

order or grab from the bu et. If they haven’t eaten yet, you can go grab

some food together.

17. All the food looks so good… I’m not sure what to get! What are you

thinking? Or what have you tried? A variation of asking for a

recommendation is asking simply for advice on what to order. Even at

networking events, you can walk up to the bar to get recommendations.

18. What a beautiful / cool / ugly / bizarre venue. Have you been here

before? One thing you will always have wherever you are, is context.

Whether you are in a house, a restaurant, or a ballroom, there is always

something unique to comment on and ask about.

19. Did you see that viral ____ YouTube video? It was all over my social

media today. If there is a great video you just watched, bring it up. If

they have seen it you can laugh together. If they haven’t, you can show

them!

20. I’m making a co ee / going to grab a drink, does anyone else want

one? This one is fantastic because you can use this to address an entire

group–maybe your new team on your rst day at a new job, or a group

of people you are sitting with for a presentation at a conference. This

can be a good way to test the water and open up further conversation

with the people who join you on your co ee run.

When in doubt, if you feel a little awkward asking personal questions right out of
the gate, use your environment and surroundings to create conversation.
Comment on the food and drinks. Ask about the venue or location. You also can
ask general interest questions, such as their favorite sports team or YouTube
video.

×
 get to know someone!

25. Who is your role model? If you are talking about an inspiring person, a

boss, an author, or even a celebrity, you might be able to ask the person

about their role model. This is a great way to talk about who inspires

you too!

Remember: Be bold. Ask the deep stuff. If you are not real, the majority of
conversations can hover on the surface-level topics. It’s refreshing to talk about
more meaningful areas of our lives. It’s true, some of those conversation starters
may be a bit forward, but if the conversation is progressing well, I encourage you
to try them. You never know what you will find out!

Conversation Starters for Work

Appropriate Topics

The most successful professionals know how to both be productive at work and be
likeable. How can you do this? You have to use the right conversation starters to
open genuine, authentic conversations in the office. I love all of the conversation
starters I have already mentioned for trying with your office colleagues, but here
are a few more.

26. Is there a charitable cause you support? Sometimes at work all you

talk about is… well… work. This question is great to learn what someone

is passionate about outside of work. Make sure you have your favorite

charity picked out before you ask so you have a great answer too!

27. I’m a bit nervous about the _____. Have you ever done it before?

Sharing personal information to others can increase how likeable you

are perceived to be, and can help form new social bonds. You can use

this trick to start a conversation at work with a colleague, and get some
×
good advice on whatever challenge you’re currently facing–whether it’s

a new piece of software or a di cult client.

28. What has been the best thing about working here? This is especially

helpful if you are starting a new job. You can also use this one if

someone new has joined the team and you want to share your favorite

thing with them.

Have you learned any insider tips about working here? You never know
what you are going to hear with this conversation starter! It’s a good one! I love to
ask for insider tips and insider knowledge.

Conversation Starters for a First

Date

So you’ve ordered your drink and found a nice table. You know how to flirt, but
do you know what to talk about on a first date? The best conversation starters
for dating are ones that can give both of you an insight into the other’s personality
and life.

30. What job did you want to do when you were a kid? Maybe they wanted

to be an astronaut, or a vet. You can ask follow up questions too. Are

they still interested in space studies? What changed when they grew up.

Do they love the job they are in now? This type of conversation starter

can open up topics such as future goals and professional development

too.

31. If you had to pick one–skydiving, bungee jumping, or scuba diving–

which would you do? This rst date question is great to gure out if ×
your date is an adventurer. It might turn out that they have done one or

more of these things already. Or, they might be terri ed of the idea of
 any of them. And if you are adventurous, good news: adventurous

people are usually considered more attractive. Either way, you’re

bound to get a great answer and an insight into the way they approach

risk.

32. What’s the most important thing I should know about you? On a rst

date, you are trying to really get to know each other. Basically, you are

trying to suss out if someone would be a great t for you (and you for

them). This question is a great way to get to the heart of the matter.

33. When you were a kid, what did you think your life would look like

now? The ideal conversation starter for a rst date is a Trojan Horse –

something light and whimsical–and,actually, it’s a good excuse for you

to share your aspirations with your date and open up potential

conversations about your childhoods, education, or hobbies.

34. Which of your family members are you most like? Are they

particularly close to their mom, their dad, their great aunt? This

question gives you an idea of their family setting, and also gives them

an easy opportunity to describe themselves simply. They might say they

are most like their godfather because they love books, or like their

brother because they have a crude sense of humor. Their relationships

with key people in their lives is likely to give you some insight into how

their relationship might look like with you.

There are so many great conversation starters that can be used on a date. We even
have a dedicated post on first date questions if you need even more ammo!

Conversation Starters for Kids

“Sure, I don’t mind babysitting for the night.” The words kind of slip out before ×
you can think it through, and you’re left with a kid you don’t know. Is Batman still
cool? Are Dinosaurs? Is it even still cool to say cool?
Don’t worry, we’ve got you. With these great conversation starters with kids, you’ll
never run out of discussion topics. If it feels awkward, remember that research
suggests back and forth conversations with children helps boost their brain
development.

35. Do you think there are aliens on other planets? This one is fun and

there is no wrong answer; either way, the conversation will be great. If

they say no, ask them why; if they say yes, ask them to think about what

life on another planet might look like. Kids’ answers are usually

surprisingly profound and creative.

36. If you were an animal, what animal would you be? Why? This is an

easy way for a child to tell you about their personality. They might relate

to a puppy because they’re playful and run around a lot, or a sh

because they love swimming. Also consider, what would you be? They’ll

probably ask you back, so make sure you have a good answer.

37. When you’re a grown up, what type of house will you live in? This is a

more exciting take than the “what do you want to be when you grow

up?” question. Loads of adults will ask that–b o r i n g. Instead, ask

about what their house will look like. Do they want a swimming pool, a

garden full of jungle plants, a slide from their bedroom into the living

room? Encourage them to get creative. It might give you some fun

home decor tips too.

38. Who would win in a ght, a robot or a dinosaur? You can take cues

from things around you–do they have some toys in the room, or a

superhero on their shirt? Use this to form a question, the sillier the

better. You’ll make them laugh, and they’ll rate you as the coolest grown

up.

↑ Table of Contents ↑

×
Funny Conversation Starters

Funny conversation starters can be used in (almost) all of the situations above and
they serve only one purpose: to make people laugh.

Laughter is important for bringing people together, so you’re sure to be the life
of the party with one of these funny conversation starters.

39. What was your worst fashion disaster? Everyone has a few out ts

from their past that seemed like a good idea at the time. This

conversation starter will help you get to know what the people in your

life were like before you met them. It will probably come with a few

great stories about their days as an early 2000s emo or 1960s mod.

What makes this funny conversation starter especially useful is it can

cross the age divide, bringing older members of the party into center

stage with fashion faux pas from the past.

40. What’s the most embarrassing thing you did at school / when you

were a kid? This conversation starter works best in groups, when

people will have time to think of their own story while laughing at the

others sharing theirs. Reminiscing about the past can make people

feel calmer (so it may be worth cracking open this conversation starter

on a tough day at the o ce).

41. If you had a reality TV show about your life, what would your theme

song be? It’s a good way of talking about music without asking people

what bands they like (which can be a bit stilted and boring), and it

short-circuits any indier-than-thou posturing in the name of fun. Bring

it to life in the style of a ‘90s sitcom by probing people on the cheesy

clips that might accompany their montage bonus points if you get your

friends to suggest your theme tune).

42. What’s your plan if there was a zombie apocalypse? Honestly, you’ll

be surprised by the amount of detail people can go into it while

describing their remote getaway or elaborate escape routes. This funny

conversation starter can turn raucous as you pick holes in each other’s

doomsday survival plans.

It might sound counterintuitive, but despite learning some great conversation

starters, keep it relaxed and natural. Keep these ideas somewhere in the back of
your head for lulls in conversation and awkward silences;don’t try to crowbar
them into a conversation that is naturally flowing in a difficult direction. Just be
yourself, have a genuine interest in people and their lives, and try to learn about
them.
×
↑ Table of Contents ↑
Calendar Speci c Conversation

Starters

You can also use time to help you think of great conversation starters. These are
really helpful to have in your back pocket. Whenever there is an upcoming holiday
or special event, I use these as a basis for fun and light-hearted conversations.
Here is a calendar-inspired conversation starter list for you. Remember you can be
creative with these as well. If there is ANY holiday or event coming up, be sure to
ask about it!

43. January: What’s your New Year’s Resolution?

44. February: Do you usually celebrate Valentine’s Day? Do you think it is a

real or fake holiday?

45. March: “I went to the coolest Irish bar last St. Patrick’s Day. Doing

anything fun this year for it?”

46. April: How long did you believe in the Easter Bunny?

47. July: What’s the best reworks display you’ve seen on the 4th of July?

48. October: What’s the best Halloween costume you ever had? Or Do you

like haunted houses or scary rides?

49. November: What’s your favorite Thanksgiving Dinner food?

50. December: How does your family celebrate the holidays?

↑ Table of Contents ↑

Birthday Party Conversation

Starters

If you have a birthday or are celebrating someone else’s birthday, I always ask
these to get the conversation going:

51. To the birthday person: “What was the highlight of your last year?” Or,

“What do you want to achieve for next year?”

52. To fellow celebrators: “How do you usually celebrate your birthday?”

Or, “What was the best birthday you ever had?”

53. To everyone else: “What was the best (or worst) birthday gift you ever

received?” This is a great one to do around a dinner table. The answers

are always hilarious.

×
↑ Table of Contents ↑
Tinder, Bumble and Other Dating

Conversation Starters

Tinder can be a challenge to having deep conversations — but it can be done! The
best conversation starters on Tinder or other dating apps isn’t always a cheesy
pick-up line. Instead, you want an opener that works twofold. You want to
communicate that you have taken the time to read their profile and learned
something about them, and also to tell the other person something about yourself.
It’s a win-win, and the conversation will flow naturally from there once you have
found some common ground.

Choose one of these great conversation starters to open a conversation on Tinder,

and modify it to show your own personality. You just have to fill in the blank:

54. You have a ___? Me too! Tell me more. Anything you have that is

similar to the person you are interested in is a great conversation

starter on Tinder. We like people like us. This is known as the

similarity-attraction e ect. Fill in the blank with your similarity, and

then ask for more details.

55. Hey – you’re a _______? That sounds really interesting. What’s your

favorite thing about your job? People love talking about themselves.

Keep this in mind when you’re starting conversations online too. People

are more likely to respond to you if you ask a question. It goes without

saying, but modify this conversation starter depending on their pro le.

56. Sorry if this is a bit forward, but I’m going to try out that new _____

that opens downtown next week–would you like to come? Straight to

the point, this conversation opener makes it clear that you’re interested

in a genuine relationship and would like to meet in real life. Make sure

to keep your language casual and friendly, and you’ll ace it.

57. Hey, how is your week / weekend going? This one is nice and simple,

but can open a conversation to a lot of di erent directions–perhaps

they’ve had a weekend stuck in the o ce working, or they’ve had an

amazing week of sales. It’s important to give them some information to

reply to, too.

Any and all of these conversation starters will work for you, if you are courageous
enough to drop the boring ones and get to the good ones. Most people are so
relieved to have you start and continue the conversation anyway! Remember, you
also want to have YOUR answers to these questions ready to go. If someone
doesn’t know their answer, you can jump in with yours to make them feel more ×
comfortable. Good luck! Can’t wait for you to have your next convo.
 A B O U T VA N E S S A VA N E D W A R D S

Vanessa Van Edwards is a national best selling author & founder at

Science of People. Her groundbreaking book, Captivate: The Science of
Succeeding with People has been translated into more than 16 languages.
As a recovering awkward person, Vanessa helps millions find their inner
charisma. She regularly leads innovative corporate workshops and helps
thousands of individual professionals in her online program People School.
Vanessa works with entrepreneurs, growing businesses, and trillion dollar
companies; and has been featured on CNN, BBC, CBS, Fast Company, Inc.,
Entrepreneur Magazine, USA Today, the Today Show and many more.

43 replies on “57 Killer Conversation Starters So

You Can Start A Conversation With Anyone,

Anytime”

FRONTNCENTER

I always ask weird questions to break the ice with people.

“So how is the weather on Earth?”

“Been to any good planets lately?” ×

J U N E 1 6 , 2 0 2 0 AT 1 : 0 4 PM - R E P LY

RUTH EMUOBONUVIE

I really nd most of the traditional ways of asking questions very

boring. For me, this is timely. As a matter of fact, I just tried out one

your alternative to ‘how was your day’. I love it.

Thank you so very much Vanessa. You rock!

M AY 1 9 , 2 0 2 0 AT 1 : 5 9 PM - R E P LY

SANDEEP SINGH

Thankyou For Sharing this kind of information with us… I want to

tell one thing that one is, Its all about our mindset, If we are

thinking about yourself good then we get good things, Same like

that if we are thinking bad thinking then we are getting bed

thing’s… Overall depend upon our mindset.!!

A PR I L 2 4 , 2 0 2 0 AT 9 : 3 4 A M - R E P LY

D O R OT H Y

These are great suggestions! I am pretty quiet and shy and just met

someone and nd myself thinking of OMG, what are we going to

talk about, so some of these would be great. We are going on a date

and I will surely use some of these! Fingers crossed!!

J U N E 8 , 2 0 1 7 AT 1 0 : 1 0 A M - R E P LY

×
PACO

Great book! The tools I need to better understand and read people

and to become more engaging with them and leave a more positive

memorable experience.

A PR I L 2 6 , 2 0 1 7 AT 9 : 2 5 A M - R E P LY

SARAH

This is a fun one I think during the Oscar season. Yes I live in So

Cali.

Have you seen the Oscar nominated lms for this year?

Which Oscar nominated movie is your favorite? What do you like

about that movie? Which movie or actor etc do you think will win

this season?

F E B RUA RY 9 , 2 0 1 7 AT 1 : 1 9 PM - R E P LY

T E S O L L A DY

I am an ESL Instructor at a local college and I’m always looking for

ways to “pull” conversation out of my students. I’m looking forward

to using some of your ideas as well as encouraging my students to

use them as they learn English. Thank you for you insightfulness!!

JA N UA RY 2 4 , 2 0 1 7 AT 1 1 : 2 1 A M - R E P LY

×
RIKY
wow a very good article, add my insight, I always dreamed of

speaking with english language, because I want to have an

acquaintance of strangers, I would learn over and over until it can

be

J U LY 2 5 , 2 0 1 6 AT 9 : 5 7 A M - R E P LY

DA N

Nice post. I also like to “start on a high” as Vanessa mentions

someplace else. I believe that gradually more and more people will

abandon those “How are you? Fine.” social scripts and move

themselves into much more interesting and engaging style of

conversation.

J U N E 3 , 2 0 1 6 AT 7 : 4 2 A M - R E P LY

MELISSA

These are great! I absolutely hate small talk, but these seem more

interesting.

M AY 1 5 , 2 0 1 6 AT 2 : 0 3 PM - R E P LY

GINA

i think these tips would only work with chicks and really talkative

guys

A PR I L 1 , 2 0 1 6 AT 8 : 5 2 PM - R E P LY

×
P R I YA L K U M A R

These tips are really helpful, thanks a lot. 🙂

M A RC H 1 0 , 2 0 1 6 AT 6 : 0 6 A M - R E P LY

DA N I E L L E M C R A E

Hooray! Thank you for reading, Priyal 🙂

Danielle | Science of People Team

M A RC H 1 5 , 2 0 1 6 AT 1 2 : 3 0 PM - R E P LY

L AU R E N F R E E M A N

These get my mind going on which ones I’d like to be asked and

what my answers would be! I’m a little nervous to try the going deep

ones, but that comes with time! The next time I’m at an event where

I’ll be meeting many new people, I’ll have a mental list going on

which ones to try out and which ones do well 🙂

F E B RUA RY 2 3 , 2 0 1 6 AT 7 : 2 7 PM - R E P LY

L I A M H AY E S

I love these conversation tips! I feel that on many occasions, small

talk can be di cult. I oten can end up using the regular “where are

you from?” / “what do you do?” questions. I think it’s a super good

idea to have tested conversational jewels in your back pocket to keep

you from boring your audience.

×

F E B RUA RY 1 4 , 2 0 1 6 AT 1 2 : 4 3 PM - R E P LY
BELLA PERENNIS

Great summary! My all time favorite is: Which super power would

you like to have? But “What’s you passion?” is pretty cool too.

Simply but explosive.

F E B RUA RY 1 2 , 2 0 1 6 AT 3 : 3 7 A M - R E P LY

DA N I E L L E M C R A E

I love asking the super power convo starter too!

Danielle | SOP Team

F E B RUA RY 1 6 , 2 0 1 6 AT 1 0 : 3 6 A M - R E P LY

E L J AC KO

Thats True

JA N UA RY 2 8 , 2 0 1 6 AT 1 : 4 0 PM - R E P LY

ELMAR ĆO

Tell me about you

JA N UA RY 2 8 , 2 0 1 6 AT 1 : 4 0 PM - R E P LY
×
CALEB RIKER

I’ve got to say, if anyone starts a conversation with me by saying,

“Tell me about you,” or asking, “What’s your story?” then that

conversation is going nowhere. Those questions are incredibly

anxiety-inducing, and I start looking for an exit when I hear them.

JA N UA RY 2 7 , 2 0 1 6 AT 8 : 1 1 PM - R E P LY

DA N I E L L E M C R A E

Thanks for your comment, Caleb. We recommend that you nd a

conversation starter that you feel comfortable with you you come

across as your most authentic and genuine self. You could try

“How’s your day going?” or “Up to anything fun this weekend?”

and then progress to the deeper questions if you felt comfortable!

Danielle | Science of People Team

F E B RUA RY 8 , 2 0 1 6 AT 1 0 : 4 9 A M - R E P LY

M E DA

Looking forward to try this!

JA N UA RY 4 , 2 0 1 6 AT 8 : 5 0 A M - R E P LY

R O B BY S M I T H

Such a great post on knowing what to say when the conversation

×
either gets dull or you don’t know exactly how to start a

conversation. Thank you Vanessa for sharing these great tips!

NOV E M B E R 2 4 , 2 0 1 5 AT 6 : 1 0 PM - R E P LY

BRANDON LEE

Another favorite of mine akin to the polar bear one is fat peguins.

Just walk up to the person and say “Fat penguins”. When they look

at you weird or ask you “What?” You look at them and say “Fat

penguins. They’re a great way to break the ice.”

S E P T E M B E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 5 AT 1 0 : 0 4 PM - R E P LY

DA N I E L L E M C R A E

Love this!

Danielle | Science of People Team

S E P T E M B E R 2 0 , 2 0 1 5 AT 6 : 3 8 PM - R E P LY

KAREN ANDERSON

Unless, of course, the person you’re saying it to is FAT.

O C T O B E R 1 7 , 2 0 1 5 AT 2 : 0 8 PM - R E P LY

TC A

In that case, I always open with “How much do you weigh?”

×

JA N UA RY 2 7 , 2 0 1 6 AT 8 : 1 4 A M -
H A R RY M CG I L L

“Hello, voices in my head told me to come and talk with you”. (Done

with a rye smile of course) Being Scottish helps here too. haha.

S E P T E M B E R 1 7 , 2 0 1 5 AT 9 : 2 5 A M - R E P LY

SERGIO

Risky business indeed, what if in your audience there’s a

psychiatrist….

O C T O B E R 1 3 , 2 0 1 5 AT 2 : 1 4 PM - R E P LY

M A R S H A F R O M Y E SY E S M A R S H A .CO M

LOVE this! So many people suggest conversation openers that are

really wacky, and while I think they *can make for great

conversations, personally, I never feel brave enough to lead with

those! I love how you’ve suggested so many that would feel

comfortable to anyone.

Also, I’m a huge fan of questions that elicit a positive response

(because they make the answerer feel good – and, as Maya Angelou

says, people will never forget how you made them FEEL!), so I love

that you have so many in here.

Sharing now, thanks!

AU G UST 1 3 , 2 0 1 5 AT 6 : 0 4 A M - R E P LY
×
 DA N I E L L E M C R A E

Thank you for reading, Marsha! I absolutely agree–these

conversation starters seem doable and fun!

Danielle | Science of People Team

AU G UST 1 4 , 2 0 1 5 AT 1 2 : 3 3 PM - R E P LY

STEPHEN F URNARI

I tested 3 of these Killer Conversation Starters at a conference

networking mixer for attorneys recently. I repeatedly used: (1) What

personal passion project are you working on right now?; (2) What’s

your story?; and (3) Working on anything exciting lately?

What’s brilliant about these conversation starters is that they get

the other person talking about something they are passionate

about, which might not be about work, but leaves the door open for

a conversation about work if they’re not comfortable sharing

personal information. The result was 48 high quality contacts and a

few new friends.

J U LY 1 8 , 2 0 1 5 AT 5 : 0 5 A M - R E P LY

DA N I E L L E M C R A E

Hi Stephen, wow! Thank you for sharing your experience with us.

I am thrilled to hear that these conversation starters worked so

well for you!

Danielle | Science of People Team

×
J U LY 2 1 , 2 0 1 5 AT 3 : 0 7 PM - R E P LY
 STEPHEN F URNARI

I am happily married (to someone else). But smart and successful

are attractive qualities and Vanessa has got them both! Her

signi cant other is no doubt a lucky person.

JA N UA RY 2 9 , 2 0 1 6 AT 2 : 0 3 PM - R E P LY

BWAY N E

I have tried the ‘Whats your passion?’ line on women with

disappointing results.

It seems that stay at home moms passions have been restricted to

kids only. Vanessa, you are lovely with a great smile.

M AY 1 2 , 2 0 1 5 AT 1 : 1 1 A M - R E P LY

KEVIN

desperate?

J U LY 1 6 , 2 0 1 5 AT 6 : 1 0 PM - R E P LY

TAS H A

I love this one ” HI! … let me ask you a question, how much does a

polar bear weigh? ….(they say I dont know)… oh that’s OK, neither

do I, but it’s enough to break the ice!” Even if they have heard it

before they join in and it gets things going. (can you tell I work in ×
sales :P)
DE C E M B E R 1 0 , 2 0 1 4 AT 4 : 0 9 PM - R E P LY

KEVIN

Did you know a polar bear actually weighs about 990 lbs.

(Beaufort Sea population, Male, Mature)

J U LY 1 6 , 2 0 1 5 AT 6 : 1 2 PM - R E P LY

ALEX

Awesome thanks!

S E P T E M B E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 4 AT 1 2 : 3 0 A M - R E P LY

JIM SNELL

Yo

J U LY 3 1 , 2 0 1 4 AT 3 : 4 5 PM - R E P LY

ALEX

best ever

S E P T E M B E R 1 9 , 2 0 1 4 AT 1 : 0 4 A M - R E P LY

×
 M O N K E YG

I think your funny readers may still be single 😛

S E P T E M B E R 2 2 , 2 0 1 4 AT 1 2 : 5 2 PM - R E P LY

KEVIN

i am

J U LY 1 6 , 2 0 1 5 AT 6 : 1 3 PM -

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 Replay

Take Your Conversation to a

Deeper Level

Now let’s get to the deep conversation starters.

Let’s say you have been speaking to someone for a while, or it is a friend you have
seen many times before and you need MORE to talk about. These are my deep
conversation starters. In my book Captivate, I break down every interaction into
3 phases. The first 5 minutes — this is during your first impression when you are
getting to know someone. The first 5 hours — this is when you start meeting for
coffee, working together, or going on dates. And last, the first 5 days –that’s when
you truly find friends, partners, and long time colleagues. These questions will
help transition you from the first 5 hours to the first 5 days.

21. If you had to pick any character in a book, movie, or TV show who is

most similar to you, who would you choose? Why? This is great if

someone has just talked about an actor or book or movie. It tells you a

lot about a person to hear which character they feel most like.

22. When you were growing up, what was your dream job? Is any part of

that still true? I love asking this one anytime someone has just

mentioned something about their childhood or growing up. It also

helps you talk about whether their current job is similar to their

original dream.

23. What’s your biggest fear? Whew, this one is deep, but soooo good! It

always sparks great conversation. ×

24. What’s your biggest regret? Talking about regret can really help you

get to know someone and their past. Only ask this if you really want to