ASK SSAMBA

Talking about Office Romance Volume 1 Issue 2

“Office Romance” down, by allowing feelings of a

sexual nature to become active The other two thirds are shared
Any Implications? towards another employee, is
having a romantic relationship at
amongst all the other environments
such as at home, markets, church,
work. concerts or cinema. The one third of
their time spent at work keeps
Every two out of fifteen employees employees in contact with people
About the Author in each organisation is dating a they see almost everyday.
colleague.
Steven Ssamba - Is a The observed behaviours and val-
HR Practitioner and HR Workplace romantic relationships ues and material possessions of
writer. Currently he works are of two natures. One; between fellow employees are a recipe for a
with Medecins Sans Fron- employees of similar ranking and prelude to relationships (some
tieres. He holds a BA two, between managers and their friendly some sexual).
(Econ), and Post Graduate Qualifications in subordinates (most often immediate
Training and Development and in Human subordinates). There are numerous possible expla-
Resources Management nations for the reason the workplace
A salesman dating a sales woman or becomes a breeding ground for ro-

o ne of the topics that is rarely

given attention in today’s
workplace is intimate affairs
a janitor dating a tea girl in the same
organisation are said to be engaging
in a peer to peer relationship. On
the other hand and at the topmost
mantic relations.

According to the theory of gender

and power, by Lipman-Blumen, the
between workmates or simply put, level of the organisational hierar- power differential that exists
office romance . According to chy , it could be two managers of between employees can be a source
research published in the work- different departments seeing each of need for the redistribution of that
place journal, hundreds of individu- other. power.
als enter into a romance with a
fellow employee each year. It The second category of office Some employees unconsciously tap
doesn’t matter whether it is in down romance is dating between a subor- into this power (to take a share of it)
town Kampala or in a remote district dinate and a superior. According to by allowing themselves to be taken
administration office in the rural. No organisation psychologists this is the up by the need for affection from the
doubt a big number of relationships most common form of office power holder. This theory explains
are now started at the office. romance and the most absurdly dan- romantic relationships between
gerous because of its implications managers and subordinates.
The reason it has not been given on a number of considerably impor-
much attention is most probably tant issues or activities at the work- This form of dating is common in the
because it is frequently between place such as employee perform- workplace between managers and
Managers and their subordinates as ance evaluation, promotions, their assistants, secretaries, drivers,
opposed to between employees of discipline and implementation tea girls, messengers or even
similar rank. of organisational policies, proce- janitors.
dures and other policy prescrip-
A definition of OR tions. Because there are a few documented
Many of you reading this article benefits of office romance, especially
would readily acknowledge having There is one commonly agreed if it is a family business, this paper
engaged in a romantic affair at work explanation for the occurrence of will only discuss the consequences of
with a colleague or at least toyed romanticism at the workplace. management allowing or condoning
with the idea of being involved in The average employee spends workplace romance, especially
one. more than a third of their lifetime at between managers and their
work. immediate or distant subordinates.
Perhaps when I say “readily agree”
I am exaggerating your honesty,
something you would rather do at a
“a big number of relationships
confession before a padre. are now started in the office…
To define office romance is simple. most of them sexual”
An employee who lets their will

15 January 2008 Page 1

The consequences In a situation where the two are A cheating employee who comes to
Romance between a superior and a romantically involved, the disci- work with marital problems from
subordinate has the greatest poten- pline and grievance handling pro- home is less likely to be
tial of distractive consequences for tocols would face a serious chal- completely involved in their work,
the employer, especially if the lenge as the supervisor would be thus affecting their productivity or
superior is in direct supervision of reluctant to impose the prescribed efficiency.
the subordinate. penalty according to the HR policy.
This is how workplace productivity
A manager who is involved in a re- Managers should be on a look out could be threatened; as the lovers
lationship with his or her junior is when disciplinary procedures are get distracted from their day today
as deadly as a bank loan that the not carried out according to set tasks, committing valuable working
organisation may be struggling to policy. hours to fulfilling their romance, their
pay back in the face of increasing work is the victim - it never gets
interest rates. All other factors judged constant, a done, at least not to the required
disciplinary session handled with standards.
It has been reported that during the mercy, leniency or without regard
routine employee appraisal, to prescribed standards might be It is not unheard of for a manager to
organisation protocols on the proc- an indicator that there might be a arrange to be away at an official trip
ess fall victim to managers who, romantic relationship between the with his or her lover who may
intending to impress their lovers, happen to be his assistant.
flaw the process by awarding high
passes for the failing juniors.
the prescribed discipline and grievance
A manager who wilfully misrepre- handling protocols of the organisation
sents the performance standards of
an individual in this case is a liabil- would face a serious challenge as the
ity to the organisation more so if supervisor would be reluctant to
the purpose of the appraisal is to
determine pay raises or impose the prescribed penalty
promotions.
to their lovers
It can be argued that an employee
who is involved with another, will supervisor and the subordinate
offer lesser focus on the job thus facing the punitive action. In today’s talk it is called arranging
compromising their performance. for QT an acronym for “quality time”
The infractions on disciplinary
Subordinates engaged in an ongo- protocols due to such a situation Obviously the employer gets a raw
ing relationship with a boss will may also affect how employees deal when it comes to wage payment
infringe on the implied duties and regard other policies. There may in the context of value for money.
responsibilities they owe the be a gradual show of lack of
employer, such as punctuality, respect for policies in the organisa- In such situations, the employers’
honesty, diligence etc as they may tion by its employees. On the other loss comes in the form of sloppiness,
feel a sense of security at the work- hand should employees see or loafing, wilful neglect of duty or
place despite their poor perform- notice discrimination in the appli- absenteeism on the part of the subor-
ing standards. cation of disciplinary procedures, it dinate as they can always count on
could create tensions, and conse- the intervention of their lover when
In their ground breaking research quently conflict at the workplace. their actions pick disciplinary
Bisking and others found that the attention.
handling of employee discipline at
supervisor level is affected by the Further complications emerge if Further, subordinates in love with the
sex of the subordinate facing disci- the relationships in both categories boss may adopt unbecoming office
pline for the infraction. The sex of (peers to peer or superior to subor- behaviour such as, being rude to
the employee at fault determines dinate) are of an extramarital their peers, refusing to accept any
the nature and gravity of the pen- nature. Not only do such cause other task that may increase their
alty that would be given. Accord- marital disaffection and break-ups work load, misappropriation of
ingly female subordinates are more in the families of the involved resources — the list is endless.
likely to receive leniency and spouses but they do harm the pro-
mercy from male supervisors and ductivity and efficiency of the firm
sometimes vice versa. in a piece-meal manner.

15 January 2008 Page 2

What HR should do about OR Such a policy should also condemn workplace, they could complain of
Regardless of the positive or nega- behaviour between lovers that sexual harassment.
tive outcomes of romantic relations could affect the carrying out of their
at the workplace, it is important to duties and also lead to sexual har- As HR managers we tend to ignore
note that unless the organisation is assment - even between lovers. the destructive potential of issues
being run by no none-sense auto- such as office romance.
crats, there is little managers can do Affairs of an extra marital nature
to stop it. But here is where the HR should be inexcusable at the work- Is it because we are culprits in this
comes in. How? Spearhead the crea- place. game?
tion of appropriate workplace
policy on office romance
Successful employees create successful
As is always advised, HR managers organizations, it is in the best interest of
should never attempt to create poli-
cies without consulting their employ- an employer to create policies that
ees . Although this procedure is disallow extramarital affairs.
rather time-consuming, it guarantees
that the policy has the full support of
all employees affected. The corre- It is true that there are no legal If we are, there is no doubt we shall
sponding measures can then be grounds for stopping such relation- continue turning a blind eye to this
implemented without any difficulties. ships, but any employer whose con- vice. If we are not culprits, then
. viction is that a successful employee taking action begins with us.
In today’s liberal business world is that one who is both happy at
driven by the productivity of em- home and at work will not want to In a world of increasing competition
powered employees, such a policy pay the price of ignoring and con- for financial resources, new product
should be sensitive to the needs of doning extra marital affairs on his development, higher customer
the employee; because workplace floor. expectations , industrial competition
dating between unmarried couples and demand for talented, committed
is not illegal. Su cce ssfu l emplo ye es cr e ate and motivated employees, HR man-
successful organizations, therefore it agers should act on vices that slowly
The policy should also be sensitive is in the best interest of an employer but surely eat away at their one
to the needs of unmarried employ- to create policies that disallow most valuable resource...the
ees as many fruitful marriages start extramarital affairs. employees of the business.
at the workplace. Recently I
attended a wedding between two There is also no doubt that the time
employees of a Mulago based spent by these employees thinking
healthcare NGO. One was posted to and fantasizing about each other
a different branch in the same This article was researched
could affect their efficiency in the
district. performance of their duties. and written by Steven Ssamba.

Policies should not be seen to Sexual Harassment As a reader and practitioner

infringe on employee rights, but Male employees are more likely to you are encouraged to share
they should nonetheless balance start “hitting” on a female employee
the needs of the “lovers” and the this article to your networks
by making unwelcome sexual
values or objectives of the business advances and other annoying ver- particularly HR Managers
entity. bal or physical insinuations of a sex- and Business Owners. This
ual nature. article may not be referenced
Give the employees their freedom and it should not be modified.
to date but also give the firm Supervisor–subordinate romances
impression that dating should take may create the possibility of sexual
place outside business premises harassment. Especially when the if you have any HR issue that
and working hours, (like in the case romance is over between the two you need advice on, Send me
of business trips). lovers. an email at:
[email protected]
Consult your employees on what A lucky employee can get off when
policies to institute, or consider a his behaviour is welcome to the
policy that condemns any form of intended recipient, however in the
public display of affection while on event that the female employee
company property and company takes these seriously as an infringe-
time. ment on their right to a harmonious

15 January 2008 Page 3