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Band Ler Met A Transcript

The document discusses Richard Bandler's use of the Meta Model technique in client sessions. It provides an excerpt from one of Bandler's sessions where he works with a client, Susan, who suffers from anticipatory loss. Throughout the session, Bandler keeps the conversation light and fun while using clarifying questions to gather information about Susan's fear. He discovers that her panic is triggered by internal dialogues where she imagines the person not showing up and pictures them in a wreck. Bandler's gentle use of the Meta Model provides a good example for practitioners to follow.

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263 views

Band Ler Met A Transcript

The document discusses Richard Bandler's use of the Meta Model technique in client sessions. It provides an excerpt from one of Bandler's sessions where he works with a client, Susan, who suffers from anticipatory loss. Throughout the session, Bandler keeps the conversation light and fun while using clarifying questions to gather information about Susan's fear. He discovers that her panic is triggered by internal dialogues where she imagines the person not showing up and pictures them in a wreck. Bandler's gentle use of the Meta Model provides a good example for practitioners to follow.

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Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
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Download as TXT, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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The Meta-Model is one of the elements of NLP that might take a while to master.

Matt Wingett looks at how Dr Bandler uses it in real client sessions.


Magic In Action, Dr Richard Bandler
Magic In Action, by Dr Richard Bandler
available here
From time to time I have heard students of NLP express their bafflement at how t
o apply the meta-model. I have also heard those on the receiving end caricature
it as a bullying series of questions that jump on vagueness in sentence constru
ctions to challenge beliefs and presuppositions, making the client feel very sma
ll.
This is understandable if you go into using the Meta Model with a confrontationa
l attitude. It's something to really be aware of, since used in that way the Met
a-Model can alienate and anger a client, which in most cases is not what the Pra
ctitioner wants to achieve at all. In their Licensed NLP Practitioner seminar,
Dr Richard Bandler and Kathleen La Valle are very clear about what the Meta Mode
l is for: it should be used as part of an information-gathering exercise, which
can also, be subtly used to start to make changes in others. The skill is maki
ng sure that you aren't "browbeating" your client with "challenges", but gatheri
ng information through clarification. Kathleen gives strong warnings against be
coming a "Meta Monster" - someone who is wrapped up in the language of "challeng
ing" Meta Model "violations".
Great examples of the fun ways the Meta Model can be applied can be found in Dr
Richard Bandler's classic book: "Magic In Action". This volume is a series of t
ranscripts of Dr Bandler working with clients. It is an extremely useful refere
nce book for studying the way that Dr Bandler uses the techniques he teaches sub
tly and very finely, and I recommend it for anyone wishing to find out how to us
e the ideas in NLP with finesse.
The following extract is from his session with Susan, a woman suffering from "An
ticipatory Loss". The session was was recorded - hence the mention of being "wi
red up" at the beginning of this extract.
Notice throughout this modelling session, how Richard keeps it light, injects hu
mour and turns the whole process into a gentle, fun conversation. It is classic
Bandler, and a delight to read:
Richard: Okay Susan. Now why don't you tell me what it is that you would like?
I don't know. We just got brought here and wired up, so you have to give me a
hint.
Susan: Okay. I have a problem with fear that is almost disabling to me at cert
ain times. When I sort of go into panic attacks. What I would like to do is di
stance myself so that when I'm in the situation that I wouldn't experience the f
ear to the degree that I have it. Where I could control myself and make better
decisions.
Richard: Is the fear appropriate? It's not like you're...
Susan: No, it's a fear of loss. It's a fear of losing friendships or close rela
tionships. Even when I anticipate a loss that isn't even real I get a panic att
ack.
Richard: The situation that you are worried about being in is the one of antici
pating and thinking about the loss?
Susan: Right. I guess, yes.
Richard: Do you lose a lot of friends?

Susan: No.
Richard: I was going to say, maybe I wouldn't hang around with you too much.
Susan: No, I really don't.
Richard: When you first said loss I grabbed for my wallet here.
Susan: No, it relates though to people and not possessions.
Richard: So it's mostly about animate things?
Susan: Yes.
Richard: Let me ask you a question. If I was going... let's say I had to fill
in for you. How would you know when to have the fear? How do you do this? Do
you do it now?
Susan: Yes. If someone... well I can in a way. For instance, if you told me t
hat you were going to be here to meet me for this session and we were close frie
nds so that it mattered to me, and then you were late...
Richard: It's been known to happen.
Susan: Then I might think that you weren't coming at all, and I would begin to
get a panic attack.
Richard: Oh. With certain people it would be something that goes on on a frequ
ent basis.
Susan: Right.
Richard: There are them that are always late. But how do you do it? How do yo
u know, how do you get the panic?
Susan: Do you mean what feelings do I get?
Richard: Let's say I had to fill in for you for a day. So one of the parts of
my job would be if somebody was late I'd have to have the panic for you. What d
o I do inside my head in order to panic?
Susan: You start telling yourself sentences like...
Richard: I've got to talk to myself.
Susan: So and so is late, look they're not here. That means that they may neve
r come.
Richard: Do I say this in a casual tone of voice?
Susan: No.
Richard: They're late... I think I'll panic now.
Susan: No, you start out slowly, because you start saying, they still have time
. I'll give them another half an hour and if they're not here by then...
Richard: I'll panic. That gives you half an hour to change the speed of the in
ternal dialogue.

Susan: But as the time goes on it begins to build.


Richard: What I want to talk about... do you make any pictures in there, too?
Susan: Yes. Pictures of whoever it is who isn't there. Maybe pictures of them.
..
Richard: Pictures of whoever it is...
Susan: The person who should be coming and hasn't come.
Richard: What kind of pictures?
Susan: Pictures of their face.
Richard: From the past, do you make new ones?
Susan: Ones of just what they look like, or maybe pictures of them in a wreck.
Richard: Pictures of them in a wreck?
Susan: Yes...

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