Reducing job hunting stress for Software Engineers and Managers

Job hunts are stressful, and my goal for job hunts is getting the job I want while minimizing my stress. The stress comes from: lack of confidence, being rushed, not having options, disappointing others, and the pressure from current job responsibilities. By expecting and mitigating each of these stressors I reduce stress during my job hunt.

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Job hunting Principles

1. Get the best job you can - You’ll have it for the next 4 years, this is an extremely high leverage activity
2. Hurry don't rush - Looking for work is expensive in stress and time. Don’t drag it out. You’ll have worse performance at work, and you’ll be stressed. That said, don't rush, it’s a slow process, which I discuss in stressors.
3. Being over prepared is worth it - You can’t know what they will ask. The consequence to being over prepared is you’re ready for the next one. The consequence to being under prepared is you fail 1 and 2.

Stressors and Mitigations

Lack of confidence

Guess what, you are human, and doing something hard you don't do often. You are going to feel insecure. Here are some things that will help:

• Study for technical interviews - A few resources I enjoyed are Elements of Programming Interviews, system design questions, modern developer tools and hacking the SDE interview. Expect to spend 4-8 hours a week for 4 to 8 weeks. The longer it’s been since you’ve interviewed last, the longer this will take.
• Buy a full size whiteboard. Practice answering questions on it. I’m not kidding.
• Prepare for behavioral questions - Think through your previous projects for situations that demonstrate leadership, confidence, team building and be prepared to discuss them.
• Do mock interviews - Ask your friends and colleagues to interview you. You should fail the first few mock interviews it’s normal.
• Expect failures -Interviews are optimized to reduce false positives, not false negatives, so expect to fail some. It’s normal.

Being rushed

Job hunting process is slow, with lots of unexpected and uncontrollable wait times. It takes time to schedule informationals, then interviews, then getting news on the offer then negotiating with multiple companies. At each of these steps managers and recruiters are busy, on vacation, etc. From your first informational to your final offer I’d expect 3 months.

• Know your “must be done by” date - don’t get stressed over your own fake deadlines.
• Your “must be done by” date is farther in the future then you think.
• Getting a job takes much longer than you think (expect 3 months)
• Space your early interviews wider apart so you have time to learn from your mistakes.
• Speed things up by studying and going through informationals at the same time.

Lack of options for next jobs

• Figure out what you want to accomplish - I thought through  Business model You Canvas and dreamed up my  dream job.
• Look around for who is hiring
• Start and maintain a list of candidate jobs
• Have a worst case scenario job
• Start with less-prestigious companies and leave the best ones till last, this builds your skills and confidence, while not wasting the best companies.

Disappointing others

• Be honest with yourself about what you can control and share.
• Think about what you can do to reduce the impact to your customers, partners, subordinates, and bosses.
• You might think telling others early is the ethical thing to do, but the ambiguity will cause them unnecessary stress.
• You might feel bad leaving your team, but change is good for you and your team. Read Everybody leaves if you're doubtful.

Pressure from current job

• Recall your highest priority is the next job, but you have existing commitments.
• Negotiate with your current boss to remove extra responsibilities. Now is not the time to stretch yourself in your day job.

Learnings from my last job hunts

I'm often asked what I've learned during my job hunts, here's what I've got :)

During your career - Do a great job ‘.’

• Previous co-workers provide important recommendations
• Gather artifacts during your career you can share.
• Meet folks, develop contacts, even if it’s expensive and you may not go there.

During the job hunting process - Avoid making up stories in your head.

• Do not compare options you do not have.
• I passed interviews I was sure I failed
• I didn’t get offers on companies that said I had them
• I had offers rescinded, and then re-instated.

During interview scheduling - You own your schedule

• Feel free to say let’s interview first, and then based on timelines lock team (helps get good offers)
• Interview at less prestigious companies, you might find it’s the most interesting job.
• Interview at high paying companies even if you aren't interested at first, you may change your mind, and if you don't, it'll help during negotiations.
• Some recruiters use pressure tactics, be respectful, but do what’s right for you. (I’m not a fan of this recruiting strategy, but it works)

During the interview - You own getting them the data they need

• Do not get cocky. They are interviewing you, not vice versa
• Draw pictures, makes it easier to understand
• Aim for consistency, get good at telling your stories and focusing on the message
• You don’t need to answer the exact question, answer it, but also add more context and thoughts on the topic.
• Share artifacts you collected through your career.
• Give interviewers a set of choices to dig into (E.g I can talk about X or Y, which would you like)
• Give several examples from the same project to an interviewer to avoid too much time giving context.

After your interview - You just spent a whole day in the spotlight.

• Your self-evaluation is often wrong.
• Even after success you need time to unwind.
• Do post interview retros to remove “step into jail” answers

After you have all your offers:

• Congrats - your hard work paid off! You made it.
• Now your stress is FOMO (Fear of missing out)!
• Think deeply about your dream job. You won’t be able to check all the boxes, but know your criteria to make great decisions.
• For apples to apples compensation comparisons, look at Total compensation
• Use the decisive to help you decide.