COMING INTO THE OFFICE WHEN YOU USUALLY WORK REMOTELY MEANS: – everyone treats you like a celebrity (and you act like one too) – you meticulously plan your outfits (instead of wearing trackies every day) – people are surprised by how tall / short you are in real life (and vice versa) – you strut in with your wheelie suitcase (like you’re entering the villa) – you treat yourself to a Pret for lunch (instead of eating the same meal prep at home every day) – someone waves enthusiastically saying “I haven’t seen you in ages!” (you have no idea who they are) – you speak to more people in a day than you did in the last month (your social battery is dying) – people ask you where you’re based (you live 20 mins away from the office and always have done)
- you popped to the loo and on your return you've locked yourself out of the office because you left your ID card on the desk - you accidentally used the frothy barista oat milk thinking it was communal only to see someones name written on it - you secretly watch YouTube to figure out how to get cold/hot water out of the complicated water contraption thing - you sit down for lunch in the communal area and everyone goes quiet, instantly changes subject or moves away slowly once they realise you work in HR
- You need to take the rest of the week off to recover from the absolute mental and physical exhaustion. (After saying to anyone who will listen "I don't know how I used to do it")
I suspect mandatory office attendance is incoming for people who work at Monzo.
- you also get zero work done because of all the noise and interruptions and it ends up just being a big social catch up... go home and do the work you're meant to do during the day!
It also means: - An hour or two of your day gone just to travel - Spending more money to get to work than staying home, and you're not wasting a tenner on a glorified cheese sandwich from a shop - Have to put up with certain conversations and certain people you've got absolutely no interest in - Coffee quality is much worse - Getting less work done as you're constantly interrupted - Locking yourself out because you forgot your keycard - You've got no dedicated desk But hey... clothes right?
Also… you are surprised at the number of catfishes your company has employed, no one looks anything like their Teams photo 🤣
I agree with all the above EXCEPT I’ll always treat myself to an Itsu/Wasabi sushi box. Pret sucks, IMHO. Shoot me. 🍣
Also, calories don't count on office days 🤣
Project Manager / Psychology, DEIB & dog enthusiast
3mo- a downgrade on the quality of your caffeine / milk / drinks receptacle of choice - noticing every sniff, cough and keyboard tap - getting next to no work done - returning home harbouring the office lurgi