Matty Piazzi’s Post

How to stop making assumptions at work? Today, Fabrice asks: — "I often catch myself assuming what others think about me. How can I change that? — Welcome to Episode 207 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Fabrice: — Let’s try this practical tool: →    The THINK Method It’s often used in therapy to reduce conflict. But we can also use it when we catch ourselves making assumptions. Let’s see how to use it. 1.    First, take a moment to breathe and notice your thoughts. For example, you might think: →    “I feel like my boss thinks I’m not doing a good job” Now, let’s dive into the THINK method. We’ll reflect on 5 questions — one for each letter of THINK. 1.    T — Think Ask yourself: →    Is this assumption true? →    What facts do I have to support it? For example, you might say: "Last week, my boss didn’t give me positive feedback on my project. But I also remember she said she appreciated my effort on the last one." 2.    H — Have Empathy Ask yourself: →    How might the other person be feeling? →    What could they be going through? Sometimes, we just need to put ourselves in others’ shoes. Maybe your boss is under a lot of stress with deadlines. Maybe she didn’t have time to give everyone feedback. 3.    I — Interpretations Ask yourself: →    Am I considering other possible interpretations of their behavior or words? Maybe your boss isn’t upset with your work. Maybe she’s just busy and hasn’t had a chance to acknowledge it yet. You know what I mean? 4.    N — Notice Ask yourself: →    What do I notice about my feelings right now? →    Am I feeling anxious, insecure, or something else? You might feel anxious about your boss being unhappy with you. But it’s not always about you, right? :) 5.    K — Kindness Ask yourself: →    How can I respond kindly to myself and the other person? For example, you might remind yourself that everyone has off days. You could also check in with your boss about your progress. And maybe ask for feedback. Got it? That’s it. Try this exercise whenever you notice yourself making assumptions. As we know, the more we practice, the easier it gets :) — Alright! Thanks for your question, Fabrice. Question of the day: →    Do you ever catch yourself making assumptions? Let me know in the comments :) “Let’s build a world where everyone belongs through the power of wellbeing!” – Matty

How to stop making assumptions at work? Today, Fabrice asks: — "I often catch myself assuming what others think about me. How can I change that? — Welcome to Episode 207 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Fabrice: — Let’s try this practical tool: →    The THINK Method It’s often used in therapy to reduce conflict. But we can also use it when we catch ourselves making assumptions. Let’s see how to use it. 1.    First, take a moment to breathe and notice your thoughts. For example, you might think: →    “I feel like my boss thinks I’m not doing a good job” Now, let’s dive into the THINK method. We’ll reflect on 5 questions — one for each letter of THINK. 1.    T — Think Ask yourself: →    Is this assumption true? →    What facts do I have to support it? For example, you might say: "Last week, my boss didn’t give me positive feedback on my project. But I also remember she said she appreciated my effort on the last one." 2.    H — Have Empathy Ask yourself: →    How might the other person be feeling? →    What could they be going through? Sometimes, we just need to put ourselves in others’ shoes. Maybe your boss is under a lot of stress with deadlines. Maybe she didn’t have time to give everyone feedback. 3.    I — Interpretations Ask yourself: →    Am I considering other possible interpretations of their behavior or words? Maybe your boss isn’t upset with your work. Maybe she’s just busy and hasn’t had a chance to acknowledge it yet. You know what I mean? 4.    N — Notice Ask yourself: →    What do I notice about my feelings right now? →    Am I feeling anxious, insecure, or something else? You might feel anxious about your boss being unhappy with you. But it’s not always about you, right? :) 5.    K — Kindness Ask yourself: →    How can I respond kindly to myself and the other person? For example, you might remind yourself that everyone has off days. You could also check in with your boss about your progress. And maybe ask for feedback. Got it? That’s it. Try this exercise whenever you notice yourself making assumptions. As we know, the more we practice, the easier it gets :) — Alright! Thanks for your question, Fabrice. Question of the day: →    Do you ever catch yourself making assumptions? Let me know in the comments :) “Let’s build a world where everyone belongs through the power of wellbeing!” – Matty

How to stop making assumptions at work? Today, Fabrice asks: — "I often catch myself assuming what others think about me. How can I change that? — Welcome to Episode 207 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Fabrice: — Let’s try this practical tool: →    The THINK Method It’s often used in therapy to reduce conflict. But we can also use it when we catch ourselves making assumptions. Let’s see how to use it. 1.    First, take a moment to breathe and notice your thoughts. For example, you might think: →    “I feel like my boss thinks I’m not doing a good job” Now, let’s dive into the THINK method. We’ll reflect on 5 questions — one for each letter of THINK. 1.    T — Think Ask yourself: →    Is this assumption true? →    What facts do I have to support it? For example, you might say: "Last week, my boss didn’t give me positive feedback on my project. But I also remember she said she appreciated my effort on the last one." 2.    H — Have Empathy Ask yourself: →    How might the other person be feeling? →    What could they be going through? Sometimes, we just need to put ourselves in others’ shoes. Maybe your boss is under a lot of stress with deadlines. Maybe she didn’t have time to give everyone feedback. 3.    I — Interpretations Ask yourself: →    Am I considering other possible interpretations of their behavior or words? Maybe your boss isn’t upset with your work. Maybe she’s just busy and hasn’t had a chance to acknowledge it yet. You know what I mean? 4.    N — Notice Ask yourself: →    What do I notice about my feelings right now? →    Am I feeling anxious, insecure, or something else? You might feel anxious about your boss being unhappy with you. But it’s not always about you, right? :) 5.    K — Kindness Ask yourself: →    How can I respond kindly to myself and the other person? For example, you might remind yourself that everyone has off days. You could also check in with your boss about your progress. And maybe ask for feedback. Got it? That’s it. Try this exercise whenever you notice yourself making assumptions. As we know, the more we practice, the easier it gets :) — Alright! Thanks for your question, Fabrice. Question of the day: →    Do you ever catch yourself making assumptions? Let me know in the comments :) “Let’s build a world where everyone belongs through the power of wellbeing!” – Matty

How to stop making assumptions at work? Today, Fabrice asks: — "I often catch myself assuming what others think about me. How can I change that? — Welcome to Episode 207 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Fabrice: — Let’s try this practical tool: →    The THINK Method It’s often used in therapy to reduce conflict. But we can also use it when we catch ourselves making assumptions. Let’s see how to use it. 1.    First, take a moment to breathe and notice your thoughts. For example, you might think: →    “I feel like my boss thinks I’m not doing a good job” Now, let’s dive into the THINK method. We’ll reflect on 5 questions — one for each letter of THINK. 1.    T — Think Ask yourself: →    Is this assumption true? →    What facts do I have to support it? For example, you might say: "Last week, my boss didn’t give me positive feedback on my project. But I also remember she said she appreciated my effort on the last one." 2.    H — Have Empathy Ask yourself: →    How might the other person be feeling? →    What could they be going through? Sometimes, we just need to put ourselves in others’ shoes. Maybe your boss is under a lot of stress with deadlines. Maybe she didn’t have time to give everyone feedback. 3.    I — Interpretations Ask yourself: →    Am I considering other possible interpretations of their behavior or words? Maybe your boss isn’t upset with your work. Maybe she’s just busy and hasn’t had a chance to acknowledge it yet. You know what I mean? 4.    N — Notice Ask yourself: →    What do I notice about my feelings right now? →    Am I feeling anxious, insecure, or something else? You might feel anxious about your boss being unhappy with you. But it’s not always about you, right? :) 5.    K — Kindness Ask yourself: →    How can I respond kindly to myself and the other person? For example, you might remind yourself that everyone has off days. You could also check in with your boss about your progress. And maybe ask for feedback. Got it? That’s it. Try this exercise whenever you notice yourself making assumptions. As we know, the more we practice, the easier it gets :) — Alright! Thanks for your question, Fabrice. Question of the day: →    Do you ever catch yourself making assumptions? Let me know in the comments :) “Let’s build a world where everyone belongs through the power of wellbeing!” – Matty

How to stop making assumptions at work? Today, Fabrice asks: — "I often catch myself assuming what others think about me. How can I change that? — Welcome to Episode 207 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Fabrice: — Let’s try this practical tool: →    The THINK Method It’s often used in therapy to reduce conflict. But we can also use it when we catch ourselves making assumptions. Let’s see how to use it. 1.    First, take a moment to breathe and notice your thoughts. For example, you might think: →    “I feel like my boss thinks I’m not doing a good job” Now, let’s dive into the THINK method. We’ll reflect on 5 questions — one for each letter of THINK. 1.    T — Think Ask yourself: →    Is this assumption true? →    What facts do I have to support it? For example, you might say: "Last week, my boss didn’t give me positive feedback on my project. But I also remember she said she appreciated my effort on the last one." 2.    H — Have Empathy Ask yourself: →    How might the other person be feeling? →    What could they be going through? Sometimes, we just need to put ourselves in others’ shoes. Maybe your boss is under a lot of stress with deadlines. Maybe she didn’t have time to give everyone feedback. 3.    I — Interpretations Ask yourself: →    Am I considering other possible interpretations of their behavior or words? Maybe your boss isn’t upset with your work. Maybe she’s just busy and hasn’t had a chance to acknowledge it yet. You know what I mean? 4.    N — Notice Ask yourself: →    What do I notice about my feelings right now? →    Am I feeling anxious, insecure, or something else? You might feel anxious about your boss being unhappy with you. But it’s not always about you, right? :) 5.    K — Kindness Ask yourself: →    How can I respond kindly to myself and the other person? For example, you might remind yourself that everyone has off days. You could also check in with your boss about your progress. And maybe ask for feedback. Got it? That’s it. Try this exercise whenever you notice yourself making assumptions. As we know, the more we practice, the easier it gets :) — Alright! Thanks for your question, Fabrice. Question of the day: →    Do you ever catch yourself making assumptions? Let me know in the comments :) “Let’s build a world where everyone belongs through the power of wellbeing!” – Matty

How to stop making assumptions at work? Today, Fabrice asks: — "I often catch myself assuming what others think about me. How can I change that? — Welcome to Episode 207 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Fabrice: — Let’s try this practical tool: →    The THINK Method It’s often used in therapy to reduce conflict. But we can also use it when we catch ourselves making assumptions. Let’s see how to use it. 1.    First, take a moment to breathe and notice your thoughts. For example, you might think: →    “I feel like my boss thinks I’m not doing a good job” Now, let’s dive into the THINK method. We’ll reflect on 5 questions — one for each letter of THINK. 1.    T — Think Ask yourself: →    Is this assumption true? →    What facts do I have to support it? For example, you might say: "Last week, my boss didn’t give me positive feedback on my project. But I also remember she said she appreciated my effort on the last one." 2.    H — Have Empathy Ask yourself: →    How might the other person be feeling? →    What could they be going through? Sometimes, we just need to put ourselves in others’ shoes. Maybe your boss is under a lot of stress with deadlines. Maybe she didn’t have time to give everyone feedback. 3.    I — Interpretations Ask yourself: →    Am I considering other possible interpretations of their behavior or words? Maybe your boss isn’t upset with your work. Maybe she’s just busy and hasn’t had a chance to acknowledge it yet. You know what I mean? 4.    N — Notice Ask yourself: →    What do I notice about my feelings right now? →    Am I feeling anxious, insecure, or something else? You might feel anxious about your boss being unhappy with you. But it’s not always about you, right? :) 5.    K — Kindness Ask yourself: →    How can I respond kindly to myself and the other person? For example, you might remind yourself that everyone has off days. You could also check in with your boss about your progress. And maybe ask for feedback. Got it? That’s it. Try this exercise whenever you notice yourself making assumptions. As we know, the more we practice, the easier it gets :) — Alright! Thanks for your question, Fabrice. Question of the day: →    Do you ever catch yourself making assumptions? Let me know in the comments :) “Let’s build a world where everyone belongs through the power of wellbeing!” – Matty

How to stop overthinking? Today, Aaliyah asks: — “How do I quit obsessing over past screw-ups?” — Welcome to Episode 70 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Aaliyah: — Let’s try this exercise. I did something similar back when I was an athlete after “bad races.” 1.    First off, write down the specific mistake or failure you’ve been thinking about a lot. For example: →    I missed an important deadline at work. 2.    Now, reflect on how this mistake makes you feel. Write down the emotions it brings up for you. For example: →    I feel “guilt” →    I feel “shame” →    I feel “regret” →    I feel “anger” →    I feel “sadness” Just be aware of your emotions associated with that mistake. 3.    Now ask yourself: →    How has dwelling on this mistake affected my thoughts, feelings, behavior, and/or relationships? For example: →    It made me feel less confident and worried about my job. This way, you’ll be more aware of the impact of that mistake. At the same time, you’ll be more motivated to improve your “relationship” with it. 4.    Alright! Now it’s time to challenge your negative thoughts. Ask yourself these 2 questions: →    What negative thoughts or beliefs do I have about myself related to this mistake? →    What is a more balanced and compassionate perspective to this thought? For example: →    "I'm not good enough at my job" (Negative thought) →    “Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. This doesn't mean I'm not capable. It's an opportunity to learn and improve" (Compassionate perspective) 5.    Now my favorite part — stick with me! We can learn a lot from our mistakes, right? “Um, right Matty!” Great! So, let’s extract a lesson from that mistake. “Um, how…?” Simple! Ask yourself: →    What valuable lessons can I extract from what happened? For example, your lesson could be: →    I’ve learned the importance of double-checking details before submitting work” 6.    Okay! Final step! Let’s transform that lesson into a mantra. “Um, a mantra?” Yes, a mantra. Your mantra has to be: →    Up to 8 words long →    Phrased positively →    Stated as a directive For example, the mantra extracted from your lessons could be: →    “Double check details before submitting work!” As you see: →    It's up to 8 words →    It’s a positive statement →    It’s stated as a directive And guess what? Over the next 30 days, you're gonna repeat it every day. So you can internalize that special lesson into your life. That’s it. At the end of the day, it’s all about perspective, right? Those past screw-ups are really special — if you look at them with the right lens. — Alright! Thanks for your question, Aaliyah. Question of the day: →    What’s your favorite mantra? “Let’s build a more inclusive world by spreading wellbeing globally!” – Matty 

How to stop overthinking? Today, Aaliyah asks: — “How do I quit obsessing over past screw-ups?” — Welcome to Episode 70 of AskMatty! Here’s my answer, Aaliyah: — Let’s try this exercise. I did something similar back when I was an athlete after “bad races.” 1.    First off, write down the specific mistake or failure you’ve been thinking about a lot. For example: →    I missed an important deadline at work. 2.    Now, reflect on how this mistake makes you feel. Write down the emotions it brings up for you. For example: →    I feel “guilt” →    I feel “shame” →    I feel “regret” →    I feel “anger” →    I feel “sadness” Just be aware of your emotions associated with that mistake. 3.    Now ask yourself: →    How has dwelling on this mistake affected my thoughts, feelings, behavior, and/or relationships? For example: →    It made me feel less confident and worried about my job. This way, you’ll be more aware of the impact of that mistake. At the same time, you’ll be more motivated to improve your “relationship” with it. 4.    Alright! Now it’s time to challenge your negative thoughts. Ask yourself these 2 questions: →    What negative thoughts or beliefs do I have about myself related to this mistake? →    What is a more balanced and compassionate perspective to this thought? For example: →    "I'm not good enough at my job" (Negative thought) →    “Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. This doesn't mean I'm not capable. It's an opportunity to learn and improve" (Compassionate perspective) 5.    Now my favorite part — stick with me! We can learn a lot from our mistakes, right? “Um, right Matty!” Great! So, let’s extract a lesson from that mistake. “Um, how…?” Simple! Ask yourself: →    What valuable lessons can I extract from what happened? For example, your lesson could be: →    I’ve learned the importance of double-checking details before submitting work” 6.    Okay! Final step! Let’s transform that lesson into a mantra. “Um, a mantra?” Yes, a mantra. Your mantra has to be: →    Up to 8 words long →    Phrased positively →    Stated as a directive For example, the mantra extracted from your lessons could be: →    “Double check details before submitting work!” As you see: →    It's up to 8 words →    It’s a positive statement →    It’s stated as a directive And guess what? Over the next 30 days, you're gonna repeat it every day. So you can internalize that special lesson into your life. That’s it. At the end of the day, it’s all about perspective, right? Those past screw-ups are really special — if you look at them with the right lens. — Alright! Thanks for your question, Aaliyah. Question of the day: →    What’s your favorite mantra? “Let’s build a more inclusive world by spreading wellbeing globally!” – Matty