The Contessa
- Video
- 1989
- 1h 23m
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Featured review
"The Contessa" is one of several movies Fred Lincoln shot in France back-to-back as international co-productions (back when money flowed freely before the advent of the internet killed the golden goose). With virtually the same cast, "Clinique" was a broad comedy, while "The Contessa" accurately plays like a real (if old-fashioned) drawing room rom-com, only with concise XXX scenes as part of the show.
Bionca struck me as odd casting in the title role of a rather crude American girl pretending to be a wealthy royal in order to land a rich husband, but her performance kind of grows on you. Her best friend Victoria Paris talks her into going to a villa run by Christina Bell and Jamie Gillis, as sort of a high-class matchmaker service where she can meet wealthy singles, and the romantic liaisons and conflicts unfold smoothly and quite predictably via Raven Touchstrone's screenplay.
Eventually Bionca becomes simultaneously engaged to both pompous American Jon Dough and Euro Roberto Malone, latter adding some French and Italian dialogue to the soundtrack. But her heart's set on American phony-rich guy Mike Horner, who is already engaged to sexy Porsche Lynn, via the same matchmakers. Also in the cast is a hot star of the era, Stephanie Rage as Gillis' assistant.
The acting by this ensemble cast is excellent, worthy of a mainstream version of Raven's script, though of course the XXX interruptions break the mood, not unlike those lengthy blocks of commercials one has to sit through on many cable TV networks. Gillis is quite effective as a slightly effeminate stylist, while the mysterious star Christina Bell of these Lincoln-in-Europe movies is beautiful and talented yet not given to hardcore scenes -I suspect she's a successful mainstream actress who I simply was unable to place, even though she looks familiar. She does give off a glamorous look of the '60s star Barbara Parkins.
Bionca struck me as odd casting in the title role of a rather crude American girl pretending to be a wealthy royal in order to land a rich husband, but her performance kind of grows on you. Her best friend Victoria Paris talks her into going to a villa run by Christina Bell and Jamie Gillis, as sort of a high-class matchmaker service where she can meet wealthy singles, and the romantic liaisons and conflicts unfold smoothly and quite predictably via Raven Touchstrone's screenplay.
Eventually Bionca becomes simultaneously engaged to both pompous American Jon Dough and Euro Roberto Malone, latter adding some French and Italian dialogue to the soundtrack. But her heart's set on American phony-rich guy Mike Horner, who is already engaged to sexy Porsche Lynn, via the same matchmakers. Also in the cast is a hot star of the era, Stephanie Rage as Gillis' assistant.
The acting by this ensemble cast is excellent, worthy of a mainstream version of Raven's script, though of course the XXX interruptions break the mood, not unlike those lengthy blocks of commercials one has to sit through on many cable TV networks. Gillis is quite effective as a slightly effeminate stylist, while the mysterious star Christina Bell of these Lincoln-in-Europe movies is beautiful and talented yet not given to hardcore scenes -I suspect she's a successful mainstream actress who I simply was unable to place, even though she looks familiar. She does give off a glamorous look of the '60s star Barbara Parkins.
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- The bare-ass contessa
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- Runtime1 hour 23 minutes
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