Taming the Alien

Taming the Alien

Ken Bruen

For Izzy Bain and Noel Bruen

Contents

To Fall falling have fallen in love

Untitled

Untitled

Untitled

Black as he’s painted

Exporting aliens

Ticket to ride

Barney is a dinosaur from our imagination

On break the 12th lament

Lies are the oil of social machinery (Proust)

They have to get you in the end Otherwise there’d be no end to the pointlessness (Derek Raymond)

In my last darkness there might not be the same need of understanding anything so far away as the world any more. (Robin Cook)

Castro

Americana

London

To roost

Which bridge to cross and which bridge to burn. (Vince Gill)

Felicitations

A mugging we will go

Full frontal

Trying to recapture the great moments of the past.

Cast(e)

The American way

‘We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.’ (Opening lines of ‘Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas’)

‘I have long known that it is part of God’s plan for me to spend a little time with each of the most stupid people on earth.’ (Bill Bryson)

‘The best the white world offered was not enough ecstasy for me. Not enough life, joy, kicks, darkness, music; not enough night.’ (Jack Kerouac)

Close call

‘Yada Yada’ or some such (Melanie)

Each angel is terrible (Rilke)

Brown is the new Black (London fashion guide)

Children’s program

‘One of the most disturbing facts that came out in the Eichman trial was that a psychiatrist examined him and pronounced him perfectly sane. We equate sanity with a sense of justice, with humanness, with the capacity to love and understand people. We rely on the sane people of the world. And now it begins to dawn on us that it is precisely the sane ones who are the most dangerous.’ —Thomas Merton

My kind of town (Ol’ Blue Eyes)

Applicant

Something in the way she moves

Montezuma’s Revenge

I have a need (Demian in ‘Exorcist III’)

Fist

I had a dream (ABBA)

Taming the Alien

Run for home (Lindisfarne)

Shooting

Acts ending – if not concluding

Brief debriefing

J is for Judgement (Sue Grafton)

‘Which party would you like to be invited to?’ ‘The one’, I said, ‘least likely to involve gunfire.’ (‘Midnight In The Garden of Good and Evil’ – John Berendt)

About the Author

To Fall

falling

have fallen in love

FALLS KNEW THE GUY would hit on her. With such a short mini, it was nigh mandatory. She sat, tasted her drink, waited.

Yeah ... here he was.

‘Mind if I join you?’

‘Not yet.’

He gave a quizzical look. ‘Not yet you don’t mind, or not yet to joining you?’

Falls shrugged and tried to look at home in the bar. Not easy to carry off when you’re:

a) English

b) Female

c) Black.

He sat.

She asked, ‘Do you swim?’

‘What?’

‘It’s just that you have a swimmer’s shape.’

‘Yeah? Well, no ... no I don’t, not since Jaws, anyway.’

She gave a laugh. ‘There’s no sharks in England.’

He gave a tolerant smile. Nice teeth. Asked, ‘How long since you shopped on the Walworth Road?’

She laughed again, thought, Good Lord, if I’m not careful I’ll be having me a time.

He then proceeded to lay a line of chat on her. Not great or new, but in there.

She held up a finger, said, ‘Stop.’

‘What?’

‘Look, you’re an attractive man. But you already know that. We’d date, get excited, probably have hot sex.’ He nodded, if uncertainly, and she continued. ‘I know you’d have a good time – shit, you’d have a wonderful time – and I’d probably like it too. But then the lies, the fights the bitterness ... Why bother?’

He thought, then said, ‘I like the first part best.’

‘Anyway, you’re too old.’ And it crushed him. One fell swoop and he was out of the ballpark. No stamina and they hadn’t even started. It didn’t feel good.

‘Oh hell,’ she thought. ‘Revenge is supposed to be sweet.’

Her father, in a rare moment of sobriety, had said: ‘If you’re planning revenge, dig two graves.’

He sure as Shooters Hill was in one, and she was contemplating the second. All because Eddie Dillon had smashed her heart, her trust into smithereens. The married bastard.

•        •        •

Roy Fenton tasted the tea, went, ‘Euck ... argh ... and called to the waitress.

‘Yo, Sheila, how can you fuck-up a tea bag?’

Sheila didn’t answer. The Alien was known in the Walworth Road cafe and most of south-east London. What was known was his reputation, and that said people got hurt round him.

His cousin had been part of the ‘E Gang’. A group of vigilantes who’d hanged drug dealers from Brixton lamp-posts until they’d been slaughtered in a crack house on Coldharbour Lane. Smoke that!

No one called Fenton ‘The Alien’ to his face. At least not twice. He read his poem, chewed the tea:

UNTITLED

And he had his books,

second-hand

and nearly twenty, neatly stacked

A tape recorder, German made, some prison posters

Same old ties, some photos too

And the camera, convincing lies.

For the booze

a Snoopy mug,

two shoes too tight

And English jeans

A silly grin with still,

the cheapest jacket

off the rack during some sales.

A belt

its buckle made of tin ... and clean

with undies, unmatched songs

and a hangover

God bless the mark

the usual London cover.

A watch

Timex, on plastic strap.

He stopped. Remembering ... When Stell had come to the ’Ville, him six months into the three years, and said: ‘Ron, I got pregnant.’

And he didn’t know what to say. ‘I dunno what to say.’

And she’d begun to weep, him asking, ‘What ... what’s the matter, darlin’?’

And her head lifting, the eyes awash in grief.

‘Ron ... I had an abortion.’

And he was up. Remembered that. Head-butting the first screw, taking down a second without even trying and then: the clubs, the batons. Raining down on him, like the purest Galway weather. Harsh and unyielding.

Did three months on the block, lost all remission and got an extra year. Not hard time, hate time. Fuelled and driven by a rage that never abated. The head screw, a guy named Potter. Not the worst; in many ways a decent sort. Still some humanity lingering. He gave a hesitant smile, almost put his hand out. No chance.

But tried anyway.

‘Give it up Ron, she’s not worth it.’

Fenton spat on his tunic.

The other screws moving forward but Potter, waving them back, said, ‘Have this one on me, Ron.’

•        •        •

He’d searched every pub in north London. Should have known better than to step outside the south-east in the first place. Jeez ... North! Highbury and shite talk.

Word was, she was in San Francisco. OK. He could do that ... but he would need a wedge, a real buffer. He was working on it ...

During lock-down he’d begun to write the poem. One toilet roll, with a midget William Hill biro. Gouging it down.

One of the nick fortune tellers saying: ‘I can see yer future, Ron.’

‘Yeah? See a double scotch anytime soon?’

The tier sissy who’d blown him then saw the poem, said, ‘You should send that to a magazine.’

Gave him a fist up the side of the head, said, ‘Don’t touch my stuff.’

But got to thinking ...

One lazy Saturday, Millwall were two down, he’d idled through a magazine and these words hit him like a pool cue:

POETRY

FREE APPRAISAL

CASH PRIZES

PUBLICATION

So he sent it off.

‘Fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke.’ The psycho Dex used to say it all the time. Dex, they found him in a bin liner on a heap in Walworth. An old copy of The Big Issue down his Y-fronts. Liked to read, did old Dex. And talk. But talked too much. A black chick took his throat from ear to mouthy ear.

She was dead ’n’ all.

Since Derek Raymond died, so did all the characters.

He sent the poem.

They replied:

Dear Ronald,

If we may be permitted the liberty of addressing you thus ...

Fenton thought, ‘Uh-huh, watch your wallet,’ but read on:

Our panel of specially selected judges have chosen your poem to go forward to the Grand Final. The winner receives a thousand guineas.

All entries will be published in a lavish volume that all good book stores must have. As you’ll appreciate, the cost of printing is high for a book of such quality. For a stipend of fifty pounds, we can reserve your own engraved copy. Please hurry as demand is limited.

Of course, your donation in no way affects the outcome of the Grand Final which, as we stated, is for ONE THOUSAND GUINEAS!

We eagerly await your prompt reply.

Yours,

P Smith, Co-ordinator

The World of Poetry Inc.

He wrote back:

Dear P. Smith,

Take my end outta the thousand large.

Yours,

R.Fenton

Convict.

IF YOU TURNED right on the Clapham Road, you could walk along Lorn to the Brixton side.

Few do.

Brant had his new place here. The irony didn’t escape him.

Lorn ... forlorn.

Oh yeah.

Since he’d been knifed in the back, he’d been assigned to desk duty, said: ‘Fuck that for a game of soldiers.’

His day off, he’d go to the cemetery, put flowers on PC Tone’s grave. Never missed a week. Each time