How to Be a Badass Lawyer: The Unexpected and Simple Guide to Less Stress and Greater Personal Development Through Mindfulness and Compassion

TESTIMONIALS

Claire’s devotion to mindfulness and compassion is something the legal industry has needed for decades. Better still, she presents her material in a practical and accessible manner that enables any lawyer to apply these principles to their lives.

— Jeremy W. Richter, attorney and author of Level Up Your Law Practice

It’s normal for attorneys to be skeptical, but vetted studies show the benefits of meditation. At a certain point, the success of a law practice means thinking about what is best for you as a lawyer long-term. Mindfulness meditation is one way that lawyers can focus on what’s most important to them.

— Kristin Tyler, Partner, Garman Turner Gordon LLP, Las Vegas, Nevada, and Co-Founder of LAWCLERK Legal

We all go through challenging times, and having the capacity to navigate them with compassion is at the heart of resilience. I’m thrilled that Claire has written this book for the legal profession. I can’t imagine a better guide.

— Laura Banks, Certified Compassion Cultivation Training© Instructor

Claire is a thought leader in the legal profession, and she’s sharing her knowledge of mindfulness and compassion at a time when lawyers and law firms need it.

— John Trimble, Partner, Lewis Wagner, LLP Indianapolis

Anyone who knows mindfulness knows it can be hard. Claire breaks it down in a practical way and shares how compassion can make a huge difference for lawyers whether they meditate regularly or not.

— Talar Herculian Coursey, General Counsel of Vista Lincoln Ford of Southern California, active yogi, and author of Ralphy’s Rules for Living the Good Life and co-author of #Networked and Women in Law

Claire is a great person to speak to lawyers about mindfulness, compassion, and wellness because she lives the life of a lawyer and knows how to speak their language.

— Tom MacIntosh, experienced law firm IT Administrator and Mindful Leadership Coach, certified at Reiki Level III as a meditation teacher and in emotional intelligence

I’ve had the pleasure and privilege to get to know Claire, first online through LinkedIn, then through her content and videos online, and finally through various presentations she’s given. Her presence, her perspective, and her advice bring peace. Her whole being brings peace. If you want to learn to be centered, to be in the moment, to find your Zen, follow Claire, listen to what she has to say, and read this book.

— Frank Ramos, Partner, Clarke Silvergate, Miami, Florida

Claire’s knowledge and practical understanding of what litigators face puts her in the ideal position to help lawyers navigate their practice with compassion for others and compassion for themselves, which is why I asked Claire to speak to our firm about compassion practices. Contrary to the popular image, it is compassion and not the absence of compassion that makes a truly badass lawyer. Claire shows us the way to becoming better lawyers, and people, through compassion practices and meditation. I am grateful that she is sharing her experience and wisdom about these transformational practices.

— Eddie Medina, Partner, Foley & Mansfield, Miami, Florida

Claire is a natural storyteller. She doesn’t just teach compassion and mindfulness, rather she helps you feel it and experience it for yourself so that you can put it to use in your life.

— Christon Halkiotis, CEO & Managing Attorney at the Law Office of Christon S. Halkiotis, PLLC, Greensboro, North Carolina

Meditation changed my life. The benefits took some time to emerge but with patience and practice I found myself becoming less reactive to the challenges of life. I consider the time and money I invested to learn meditation as well worth it because they were investments in myself.

— Tahmina Watson, Immigration Attorney and author of Legal Heroes and The Startup Visa.

How To Be A Badass Lawyer

The Unexpected & Simple Guide To Less Stress and Greater Personal Development Through Mindfulness and Compassion

By

Claire E. Parsons

Copyright © 2022 Claire E. Parsons

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. This book contains material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without express written permission from the author/publisher.

ISBN: 979-8-9870886-0-9 (hardback)

ISBN: 979-8-9870886-1-6 (paperback)

ISBN: 979-8-9870886-2-3 (ebook)

DEDICATION

This book is for all the lawyers who want to find a better way to practice law, who want to find a little peace for themselves even as they face the hard parts of life, and who want to learn to trust themselves more and for the countless lives they can change for the better if they do.

FOREWORD

If life or law practice has sent you unforeseen challenges, you are in good company, and we welcome you into the fold. Read on for inspiration, information, and practical skills about how mindfulness and compassion can help you transform those challenges into a journey that just might change your life and the world for the better.

Neither Claire Parsons nor I could have guessed what paths we would take after law school. We thought we’d be lawyers who just happened to have families. As it turns out, life and law practice forced us both to be more than that. It forced us to reach deeper into our strengths than we ever knew we would have to so that we could show the world the badass lawyers we are and help others own their strengths as well.

Despite being law school classmates, the force that ended up bringing us together was a surprising one: motherhood. In particular, Claire and I both shared the challenge of struggling with motherhood as lawyers. I struggled to navigate my way through law school and then practice in big law with two small children. Claire struggled with her mental health after having her first daughter. My struggle caused me to found MothersEsquire to advocate for lawyer moms. Claire’s caused her to develop a passion—and truly to find her inspiring voice—in order to advocate for lawyers’ minds and their inherent well-being.

Claire’s mission in this book is simple: to help lawyers, firms, and companies see that the work of care, including self-care, is powerful and essential to happiness as a lawyer and the long-term success of the profession. Knowing how to cultivate mindfulness and compassion is critical because any practicing lawyer knows that all the life hacks and self-help books in the world can’t change the fact that law practice is stressful. Coaches, therapists, and doctors might tell you to manage or reduce stress, but how do you do that in a profession that deals in conflict and risk assessment and requires continually helping clients navigate through adversity?

The truth is there is no magic way to make law practice less stressful, though needed systemic and cultural changes can help. While we continue to advocate for those larger systemic changes in the profession, it is important to know what lawyers practicing law right now can do to care for themselves while that change unfolds (which hopefully will allow them to be a part of the changes). Attorneys can learn to respond to stress in a new way. This includes learning to recognize the signs of stress, limiting how much their minds create unnecessary stress, and honoring and caring for their emotions. This is what mindfulness and compassion can help you do.

What’s more, Claire teaches these tools without asking any lawyer or firm to fix or change themselves. To make any necessary change, individuals and organizations may have to change practices and policies, and they may have to learn new ways of doing things. It stands to reason that one cannot expect different results from maintaining the same course of conduct. The truth remains, though, that nobody wants to be told that their way of being is deficient or that they are not already enough. That message, unfortunately, is far too prevalent today for lawyers who are already doing so much.

Claire knows this fix yourself messaging because she has lived through it. She has experienced life as an associate with a baby who wouldn’t sleep through the night while Claire tried to prepare for an impending trial. She experienced life as a law firm partner trying to support both her family and staff through challenging times while maintaining her productivity. She has experienced the demands of client needs, family obligations, and community work.

The practical guidance found in this book is built on Claire’s lived experiences, as well as years of training and mindfulness practice. Compassion and mindfulness have helped Claire manage the demands of her career and life and to thrive while doing so. Through my friendship with Claire over the years, I have witnessed Claire use her passion for this practice to guide others, and like the readers of her words will experience, I have personally benefited from Claire’s firm and gentle guidance on using compassion and mindfulness in my life.

What you will discover by reading more is that Claire teaches mindfulness and compassion in a way that lawyers can read, understand, and use. One of the things that stood out to me early on with Claire is that she loves to joke and tell stories. Though she’s analytical and deeply thoughtful by nature, she puts her sense of humor and storytelling to work in all her writing.

It’s not uncommon for her to blend ancient philosophy, a reference to Parks and Recreation or Star Wars, and a story from her life to elucidate truths about the human condition. This makes her works not only meaningful but also engaging and enjoyable to read. Since Claire is writing to help other lawyers build happy and healthy lives in the law, it makes sense that she would write