New York hasn’t been the same since Spider-Man crawled into town, but it seems like the citizens of our fair city are divided on whether that’s a good thing or not. We asked you how Spider-Man has affected your life and our (intern’s) phone rang off the hook the entire week! What did New Yorkers have to say?

Bridget K., Clinton

Spider-Man inspires me. I start thinking of those webs and how they’re connections from building to building, person to person, a web of healing energy… and it just cools my aura. As someone born without a chi (my burden), Spider-Man acts as both spirit animal and muse.  All I need to do is think of red and blue and my poetry just flows. Anybody who’d like to hear my arachnid-inspired work can catch me at the Union Square Poetry Hall on Tuesdays at 9:30 PM.

Have a web addiction? Can’t get enough of Spidey?

By Joy Mercado

Another Oscorp board meeting, another conspicuous absence for famed CEO, Norman Osborn. And rumors abound about his physical state.

The bigwigs at New York’s largest technological development firm met last night to discuss how to deal with the fallout from the latest inquiries by the Federal government and a potential revolt among stockholders. Inside sources claim that Osborn’s long absence and ensuing power vacuum provoked something of a civil war among the tie and jacket crowd. 

In this exclusive image obtained by The Daily Bugle, it appears that Norman Osborn is quite literally on his deathbed (because we at the Bugle like to speculate on the sensational…and what media outlet doesn’t?)

What’s most interesting in this Oscorp power play is Spider-Man. Osborn has been known to have an obsession with the webslinger ever since his debut. And given Oscorp’s previous position as the market leader of cross-species genetics before the Lizard’s attack on the city, that makes sense. He calls himself “Spider-Man” after all…

So what could Oscorp be developing to track Spider-Man? And will those developments stop with Osborn’s potential death, or continue in his memory? Only the person who takes the Oscorp throne will be able to make that decision. 

An Editorial from Daily Bugle publisher J. Jonah Jameson

Before Spider-Man appeared, had a Lizard creature run amok on our city streets?

Before Spider-Man appeared, did our city know the presence of a gangster wearing a mask and calling himself “The Big Man”?

Before Spider-Man appeared, was there Herman Schultz, a bank robber using homemade weapons to create vibrational waves that could shatter three-foot thick steel bank vault doors?

Before Spider-Man appeared, criminals didn’t feel the need to keep pace by joining forces and growing mobs at a record pace, like Aleksei Sytsevich’s gang.

Before Spider-Man appeared, did we hear all of the rumors of Oscorp developing terrifying creations fit to stop creatures the likes of the wallcrawler?

The mystery and mystique that Spider-Man cultivates has led the criminal element to respond in kind, indulging in secret identities, colorful costumes and worst of all: catch phrases.

Where does this end? It is my prediction that in the coming weeks we will face an onslaught of villainous activity. Residents should remain calm and be prepared for the worst — power outages, mass destruction, possible chemical warfare…

Is Spider-Man responsible for the very creation of the enhanced criminals that have emerged across the city or is his existence the only hope to stop their increasingly destructive spree? Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The answer is: the Spider.

By Ken Ellis

A grant from Oscorp Industries Life Sciences Division will provide the resources needed to maintain necessary staffing in the nursing departments of several New York City hospitals. With budgets strapped, administrators were worried they’d lack the ability to provide adequate care to patients.

The Oscorp grant will not only allow the nursing departments to maintain their current staff, it will also supply hospitals with extensive robotic medical equipment upgrades, some of which are still in the experimental phase. Of course, if experience has taught us anything, it’s that experimental robotics projects never ever go horribly, horribly wrong.

In an official statement, Oscorp spokesman, Donald Menken added, “Nurses are the front line in our city’s healthcare and Oscorp couldn’t be more appreciative of the work they do. That’s why we want to give them the best tools possible.”

When asked about the improved equipment for nurses in city hospitals, nurse May Parker said, “It’s great to see more opportunities for younger nurses and it’s also an amazing gift to the people of New York City. I’m excited to learn how to use these new machines, even if they do look a little scary.”

It remains to be seen just how impactful these new experimental robotics will be when it comes to saving lives. One can’t help but wonder, will Spider-Man even get a little jealous?

Spider-Man has trashed bad guys and saved little old ladies, but what would YOU do with his powers? That’s the question we asked last week, and our readers responded. Seems like some of you are wall-crawlers in the making, while others would rather spin a web of deceit!

Jack H., Brooklyn

To be honest, if I had Spider-Man’s powers I probably would use them as a great way to get some personal experience; (which I need for my college applications). I would swing around town and try to have a meaningful moment or something, I don’t know, that’s what colleges want, right? That’s what my Dad says. If I really had Spidey’s powers I would do a year abroad, probably in a place with a dope jungle. Sigh…one day maybe.

Think you know everything there is to know about New York’s most controversial arachnid?

By Ken Ellis

The masked vigilante Spider-Man has once again apprehended notorious bank-robber, Herman Schultz, nabbing the prison escapee yesterday afternoon during an attempted robbery at a diamond exchange in Midtown Manhattan.

Schultz managed to hold off the police for some time using his technologically advanced vibratory gauntlets that either emit dangerous pulse waves or have the unique singular power to throw cop cars hundreds of feet in the air (we’re guessing it’s the former).

After a brief skirmish that left several police vehicles heavily damaged, Spider-Man removed one of Schultz’s gauntlets and gave Schultz a taste of his own medicine, which in this case was a pulse wave right to the face.

Schultz had recently escaped from Ryker’s Island penitentiary where he was being held on bank robbery charges.  Detective Jean DeWolff of the Major Crimes Unit admitted the police thought Schultz had fled the city.

“The really sad thing about him is that he must be a brilliant engineer to create a weapon like this,” said DeWolff. “He could sell that technology and make billions, instead he chooses to rob a bank for what? A couple of grand? This guy is a stone cold dummy.”

By Melissa Hutchins

Ask and ye shall receive! Our fearless editor, J. Jonah Jameson, who recently called out Spider-Man for keeping mum and refusing to talk to the press, received quite a personal greeting this April Fool’s Day when he awoke to find his giant SUV covered in webbing! While it’s not confirmed that this is the work of Spider-Man or one of his many Spider-Fans, what is confirmed is that this… is hilarious!

By Melissa Hutchins

Spidey-Fans don their jerseys today, excited for this year’s opening day and the start of the baseball season. Of course, even in NYC there’s some debate over which team Spidey supports. Me? I like to think of him as a Mets fan. Always rooting for the underdog. Who are you root, root, rooting for this season?

An Editorial from Daily Bugle publisher J. Jonah Jameson

Is social media a powerful tool to connect people around the world or is it home to a cyber-den of cyber-losers who spend their time spreading cyber-lies about a certain “hero” named Spider-Man…

So is Spider-Man a hero because some bearded Brooklyn hipster posted a cyber-video of him webbing up a mugger outside a coffee shop? Is he a hero because a misguided high school student starts a fan club on cyber-Twitter? Is he a hero because a “cyber-blogger” like Melissa Hutchins encourages fans to plaster stencils of the masked vigilante on crosswalk signs across Manhattan?

These days it seems like everyone is talking about Spider-Man, except for one person of course: Spider-Man himself, who refuses to talk to the press. The wall-crawling weirdo would probably say actions speak louder than words, but the longer Spider-Man doesn’t talk, the longer he ignores legitimate questions about how his actions have frustrated on-going police investigations. How he has used excessive force in foiling minor crimes. How his web swinging has distracted city drivers and led to a documented twenty-four accidents (and counting).

Has Spider-Man stopped a mugger, a carjacker, or a bank robber here and there? Yeah, okay, I’ll admit he has. But can Spider-Man answer this: do those actions offset all the problems he’s created? Even if he could, I doubt he will.

We asked our readers how they thought Spider-Man got his powers. You answered by email, text, blog, and even a brick through the window (please refrain from that in the future). Here’s what you had to say:

Kevin B., St. George

“It’s gotta be something weird, right? Like he ate a bucket of spiders or injected himself with the blood of like a bucket of spiders. Wait, maybe like he went swimming in the East River? LOL! But for real, you seen the stuff that Oscorp dumps into the East River? The other day, my uncle Mikey caught a fish with four eyes and two tails! Oscorp’s got mad scientists flushing botched experiments into the river. Seriously, man. No joke.”

Think YOU know how Spider-Man got his powers? Supernatural? Scientific? Special fx?