granting you a dreamlike life

Books:
1) Gnomes of Lychford, by Paul Cornell. I really enjoyed this newest addition to the Lychford series of novellas. I just really wanted it to be longer! I wanted more! But it was relatively light and fluffy, as all of this series is, and highly enjoyable.
2) Redshirts, by John Scalzi. Usually I enjoy Scalzi's work, and this was no different. I would have liked a bit more closure with the crew, and the tantalizing hint about Hanson makes me want to re-read the whole thing to see if I catch something I missed first time (I'm sure there are many things). On the whole, a nice relatively fluffy read that I do recommend.
3) The Lights Go Out In Lychford, by Paul Cornell. This has been a gap in my Lychford reading for FAR too long and contains some very important details for later books, so it was nice to finally get my grubby mitts on a copy and find out exactly how all that came about. While there was a lot of interesting development, on the whole it kinda felt weaker in some ways than the other stories; the villain was far less defined, and didn't really seem to have much of a motivation. But it did have some excellent character moments, as Mr Cornell is so good at writing.


Dramas/TV:
1) Blood River. If you can separate it from its predecessor shows, Blood of Youth and Dashing Youth, it's pretty good, but it relies so much on the prior world building, but changes the pre-established storylines somewhat, so it can be a bit confusing. 
2) Jun Jiuling. Y'know, it really wasn't bad, never mind it took me nineish months to finish it. It had the silly face-swapping trope, but it was used well and the storyline was pretty darn good. It did suffer from second male lead syndrome, in that the 2ML could have really been an excellent match for Jiuling if it weren't for those meddling kids parents. Alas, she had to have a childhood sweetheart instead. The ending felt a bit abrupt, but it wrapped everything up and was a HE with shockingly little tragedy to be seen.
3) Vengeance of the Mountain God. This was a short drama, eps were maybe 15 minutes each? Some a little longer, some a little shorter. It was, however, very short on Mountain Gods. It was a fun story, if you ignore the typical tragedies, and generally it held together? It moved fast, for sure, and the ending felt a bit lacking, in that, again, where the hecky is the mountain god? And the vengeance? Some vengeance was taken, but the end really just whooshed off in a different direction from where I though it was being set up to go, and I wonder if it was a censorship issue or??? Huang Junjie pretty though, and sometimes that's all you need in a popcorn drama.
4) The Immortal's Ascension. I rather enjoyed this one, but no one warned me it was a season one, and who knows if we'll ever get a season two? The MC spent a lot of time being very internally focused, so lots of voice over, which was not a bad thing. He also got A Lot of cute little pals/minions/helpers that I ended up being very fond of, lol. Here's hoping second season actually happens, and sooner rather than later!
5) Agatha Christie's The Seven Dials. A fun little mini-series with relatively unknown Christie characters. I figured out some of it, but not all of it, as is usual per Christie withholding certain clues. Only three episodes, so we binged it in one night, and it was worth it. (I think binging is the best way to watch it, really.)
6) The Day of Becoming You. Body swap, enemies to lovers! And technically, a frame story even though you don't know it until the Very End. Both of the leads did a great job being each other, and the romance didn't feel rushed. And even though it was a het romance, the very nature of the body swap makes it rather queer. Rather fun, in general. The side characters were all pretty great too.



Movies:
1) "Thursday Murder Club." The mystery was not super intriguing, but the cast was superb. Fun and relatively fluffy watch.
2) "Good Night and Good Luck," which I'm putting here as a movie even though it was a filmed stage production. Quite a good production, and very much relevant to today, even if I didn't quite buy George Clooney as Edward R Murrow.
3) "The Rip," a crime thriller that was kinda predictable but not terrible. Good to see Ben Affleck and Matt Damon still being buddies after all these years. 
4) "Blade of Fury," not to be confused with the similarly titled Will Ferrell comedy. This was, instead, a rather bloody Chinese movie about a bounty hunter who somehow gets suckered into helping someone? It was a bit confusing, but the fight scenes were Very Well Choreographed. The storyline itself was a bit lacking, but the bad guys all got what they deserved, and there was also some fun comedic stuff. Not bad for if you have 90 minutes to kill, but not great.
5) "Enola Holmes 2". I came home from work one afternoon to find my parents watching the second movie which didn't make sense to me because I was pretty sure dad hadn't seen the first one, but hey, I guess watching things out of order is the order for the year! The EH films are so fun and fluffy, they're great popcorn movies. And then after we finished the second one and I asked why they skipped ahead, dad went back and watched the first one, so... *shrugs* Both parents were like, wow that makes the second one make way more sense.
6) Pangolin: Kulu's Journey. Documentary on a re-wilding program for pangolins in South Africa. I think pangolins are adorable, but didn't really know a whole lot about them other than they always look super anxious, so this was very educational, and thankfully not sad. Obviously they did mention the trafficking issues, and that these pangolins are being re-wilded because they've been rescued, so there is seriousness to it, but mostly it was a lot of footage of running after an adorable little buddy trying to escape the human caretaker.

However does the week go speeding by so quickly? Just... NYOOM.

I have now worked 8 days in a row, and will hit 11 before I get a day off. I wasn't supposed to work on Saturday, and in fact had Many Things Planned, which got kiboshed when I got asked to come into work. Le Sigh. At least I got a few things done that have really needed doing, like cleaning the bathroom and changing my bed sheets. It wasn't even really necessary that I went in on Saturday, since I was scheduled for Sunday, but... argh. 

Speaking of kiboshing things, last week I taught my therapist the word schlep. Apparently he has very limited Yiddish exposure, haha. 

Shakes went well; we stopped right before the bear pursuit scene, because we want Allesy to get to enjoy it too since she's having a rough time of things right now. Everyone should get to experience "exeunt, pursued by a bear" at least once in their lives.

Happy stabby happened, and I checked in re: the referrals that are outstanding. They remain outstanding - the doctor's office said that they're taking at least a month right now, which is super sucky. You'd think that since one is for, y'know, a cardiologist, they might rush that one? But noooo. It would be nice to get in to see the hand specialist soon too, since I've run out of physio appointments until I get someone else to OK more visits. Then again, there hasn't seemed to be a whole lot more progress there, which is another reason I want to get in to the hand specialist soon. Would like less pain, thx.

Did not actually accomplish my goals this week, as I discovered that the P&L for Maureen is hella fucked, and I just... didn't with mom's stuff, heh. I did, however, read something not tax related! Huzzah! John Scalzi's Redshirts, which was a fun little book. 

I finished yet another mini tax class thing, this one on military returns, so now I only have class to do before I level up again. Boss wants me to get to level 4 before next season, which apparently is gonna be doable considering I'm so close to 3 and will have... most of a year to finish 4. Once I hit 3, I can get small business certified. Level 4 brings advanced small business certification and Tax Pro Reviews, which is where the $$$ are, supposedly. Boss is also still making noises about training me to replace her when she retires, which... I don't know if I want to do that. 

We finished watching The Day of Becoming You, which was a fun little het romcom with bodyswappping, which I suppose makes it inherently queer in a way. The actors did a pretty darn good job of playing each other, which when one was Zhang Xincheng, I expected. Not sure what our next show is going to be. Maybe we'll just do a few movies or something until after I get back from Escapade.

Speaking of! Escapade is this weekend! I Am Excite! I still haven't got my stuff together for the art show, but I got a few things mostly finished up today, and will hopefully have some non-raining time tomorrow before work to get some pieces out of the shed to list for the show. I'm not sure what to bring this year; I feel so out of the loop re: fandom and creativity and everything. 

And tomorrow is LNY! I don't have anything to give anyone, but then again, I am not the boss so I don't have to! I'm hoping that I can make it to see Z1L's new movie after Escapade, but it would mean leaving pretty dang quickly, which is never ideal. I like seeing mah frends! But Z1L!

Goals for the Week: actually get everything prepped for the weekend (record hymns, art show, pack). survive the Big Bosses' visit tomorrow. try to get one of the two P&Ls actually finished, aiii.

Good Things: hummus. massive chocolate chocolate chunk cookies. rain at times I'm not driving.

It's been a week of not much, or so it feels. A lot of going to work and being told to go home early because there's nothing to do and there's no sense in wasting the budget to have me sitting around doing nothing but studying. (We're not usually paid for CE, so I'm really getting as much in as I can while it's quiet and I'm getting paid, lol.) My appointment who rescheduled flaked again - I even called him and was like, hey, what's the what, and he said "oh I thought it was at four" so I said, cool see you at 4. And did he show up at 4? No, no he did not.

Health stuff has gone nowhere, other than me booking my blood test - there weren't any morning appointments until next week though, which kinda sucks. No word on referrals for anything yet though.

Good-ish news - the Methodists aren't closing just yet, so I will probably have one more month of playing piano there, which is good for my bank account. Especially since my hours at the tax office are lacking and I have no appointments scheduled. I can't even do my OWN taxes (or mom's for that matter) because I don't have W-2s or 1099s. 

Started looking into info on power of attorney since the parentals are both getting older and actually admitting to forgetting things now. It seems both simple and complicated at the same time. I should probably talk to the bro-ski about it too. It's not something I want to have on my own plate all by my lonesome.

Shakes this week, and then Hamlet at the end of the week, and no official work until Wednesday. Might do some work for the other gig I picked up, might do some work for mom, might try to get some stuff together for the Escapade art show. Do have plans to get rocks identified tomorrow afternoon, which means I will then be able to get rid of them hopefully. 

Still watching The Immortal Ascension, which continues to be amusing. Finally finished Vengeance of the Mountain Deity, the ending of which was very WTF after a relatively reasonable storyline. Where was my mountain deity? Ah well, it was fluffy and fun.

Goals for the Week: Survive. Write up talking points for new tax laws. Let myself enjoy the Hamlet experience.

Good Things: warm laundry. Ginger snaps (I caved and bought some). New Z1L photos.

Whelp, it has been a week and a half of the new year and hoo boy has it been a doozy so far.

I don't really want to get into the politics of everything, but it surely has been weighing on my mind quite heavily.

I suppose I should mention at least briefly for posterity, because ugh. ( cut for politics )

ANYWAY on to the life updates and stuff. 

- I started doing the Hybrid Calisthenics workouts via the app, and oof. I am so out of shape, it's ridiculous. I looked at it and was like, hey, this'll be easy. HA. I did three days and had to take a break because I was so sore. And then the next day was a physio day, and I've decided that's going to be a non-HC-workout day anyway. Annoyingly, because my physio days move around, I can't just set my rest day on the app and be done with it.

- I started ANOTHER part-time job, this time doing bookkeeping/accounting for a business someone I know just started. It's such a mess already, omg. It took me FIVE HOURS to fix the mess she made of her accounting software and get everything to balance and reconcile correctly. She also has zero clue what she's doing, because she sent me a message with a list of vendors that she said we needed to 1099, and I'm like... no? we don't? These are vendors, not contractors? She's just so clueless, and doesn't seem to have done ANY research into how to start a business/corporation, which is so frustrating to me. Like, who starts a huge, costly project like this without doing ANY kind of research to find out what you need?

- The good news is, with that new job, I can afford to go see Suzy Eddie Izzard's one-person Hamlet production, so we're making plans for that in a couple of weeks. Very fortunately, my work schedule is such that on Friday I get off at 1pm, and then don't go back to work until 3pm the next day, so being down in LA for an 8pm show will be doable and getting back late won't be harmful to my sleep either, haha.

- cohort and tax job continue; the other day I was horrified when only one person (me, humblebrag) answered a fairly basic question correctly. Seriously. Which of these four options counts as a capital asset, and NO ONE ELSE GOT IT RIGHT?!? How did these people qualify to be tax preparers? I also made the mistake earlier of telling the teacher that I had been an ATL and CSP prior, and now she expects me to know things. Whoops.

- discovered that the 1099s that the IRS sent us were very weirdly NOT carbon copies like they usually are, despite being formatted like carbon copies. Was I clever and did I discover this BEFORE I did all the typing? No, of course not. In any case, we have some time, so we're trying to get an account with the IRS to file them online rather than doing the typey-typey, because I always fuck up so many times. Our other option is to send in the forms we have, and use the PDF form to send to the contractors, but that requires so much more effort. Ugh. I am, however, doing better at tracking my work hours for mom, and I will Not Let Myself Fail to Invoice this year.

- health stuff! Got my PCP changed on my insurance to my actual PCP for the first time in literal years. I guess that's one nice thing about them switching IPAs; they all have to take new patients again, so I can sneak in officially. I also have an appt with my pcp for next week, so we can get the hand specialist worked out, and discuss all the other Things. I need to make sure I write up my list of things to bring up before then. Physio levelled up, they're giving me more resistant items to squeeze and pull and so forth, so that's nice? Progress is being made! Also had my yearly eye doc appointment, so I'm trying out different contacts since the ones introduced last year kinda sucked. We're also going back to same rx in both eyes because my right eye is right in between the two powers. This new brand of contacts seems better so far - the old ones seemed really flimsy, and would blink out super easily, or fold in my eye and jam up under the eyelid, which was no fun.

- I *almost* got to work as a handler at ALA this weekend, and then couldn't because of the dang schedule. I was trying So HARD to make it work, but then they found someone who could work all four days, and I could only do three. But they said they would put me on their list, so hopefully if they have shows with more advance notice (the discussion happened on Tuesday, the con started Thursday) I'll be able to do some more gigs. (I am also sad because a lot of my friends are work in New Orleans this weekend at a con, but I was not picked for it.) (more therapy fodder, yaaaay)

- Dad and I are watching Blood River as the evening show, but it hasn't really been holding my attention very well and I'm not sure why. Possibly because the story is sort of a prequel, but also sort not, because the writer realized he didn't like what he'd done with the characters originally and decided he wanted to re-work them? So things don't quite fit into what has already been laid out story wise. I joined a group watch tonight of the first six episodes of My Lady General, which is gonna be fun, and hopefully I'll be able to see the rest of the eps. Sunday was the B5 group watch, which is great fun because we're up to Babylon Squared and that set of episodes, which is just SO GOOD. 

Next week is going to be busy busy busy. I have my first tax appointment on the schedule; hopefully he shows up and has his paperwork so I can actually do the thing and get those first time jitters over with. Shakes comes back this week too; I asked everyone to please double check their schedules and let me know if they foresee any missed dates so I can go ahead and get casting done now while it's calm and not while I'm stressed with tax work. We'll see if that actually works, ha. I also have So Much Work to do for mom, that I really need to get done this week. Maybe I'll take one of my non-tax work days and go sit at the shop and do work there.

Goals for the upcoming week: Survive the tax appointment. Finish work for mom. Get in the habit of doing regular HC workouts.
Good things: fuzzy blankets (always). surprisingly good headshots for work. my elephant slippers.

I would like to say I'm starting the year with enthusiasm and hope, but that's probably a lie, so instead, I will say that last year ended with a BANG for me, because...

I GOT TO PLAY A MOTHEREFFIN' BÖSENDORFER PIANO WITH EXTENDED KEYBOARD! Y'all. Y'all. I realise this is a thing that will mean little to most people, including my parents, but y'all. Bösies are like. The Granddaddy of All Pianos. You've heard of Steinway? Yamaha? MORONS! I mean. Sorry, got a little Princess Bride-y there. Steinway is what most people think of in terms of "oooh fancy piano," right? Well, Bösies are a step beyond that. Obviously, everyone has their preferences for playing, but dude. I have played the Steinways at school. And now I have played a Bösie and there is no comparing. This is a $120,000 instrument, easily. AND I GOT TO PLAY IT. I've asked if I can come over and play it more for fun, and the church was like, sure, as long as someone is in the office to let you in, go for it! I am dead y'all, D E D dead. I think my reaction to the piano tickled the people at the service, but I'm also pretty sure they don't really understand the amazingness of the moment. 

Anyway. Yeah, that was the end to my year, so that was pretty solid, compared to everything else that happened in 2025, ha.

I am now a legal, professional tax preparer in the state of California! So if any US-ians want their taxes done, I am allowed unless you are filing in Oregon or New York. And possibly other states, but those two are the bitchiest about outsiders who haven't taken their tests etc filing their state taxes.

I didn't really set goals last year, other than my media intake goals, which I knocked out of the park. I think that's a good sign, that I was getting back into reading and had the attention span to actually watch things. 

• goal was 8 books, no more than 2 re-reads: finished 14 and a play, although some of the books were more like novellas and some were spread over a few years of reading, but still! I didn't put a length of book limit, so they all count, yep.
• didn't have a movie goal, but watched at least 8, and possibly others that I forgot to put on my list, cuz, yeah, swiss cheese brain still rules here. The best of the year for me was definitely K-Pop Demon Hunters, although I was pleasantly surprised by Fantastic Four, and Dongji Rescue of course was a highlight simply because of Wu Lei and Zhu Yilong and Ni Ni and Chen Minghao all in the same movie.
• goal of 12 new shows completed: finished 19, if you count S1 of Midnight Diner as a complete show. I am, because it's listed separately both on MDL and on Netflix. Again, there may have been more, but again, swiss cheese brain.

I'm still pondering what goals will be for this year, but am planning on meeting with a friend on Saturday to go over the Year Compass, so maybe that will help clarify some things for me.

Other things of import that have happened since, uhm, the end of October:

Autism self-diagnosis support group. I joined this four-week group for December; it was meant to be a place for people suspecting they were autistic to come together, go through some assessments, and get some clarity as to whether they felt it was a legit diagnosis for them or if maybe having had some discussion and assessments to be like, no, I think it's something else. It was not a clinical diagnostic group, so I still do not have an official Dx, but the practitioner running the group IS allowed to diagnose and basically told all of us, "So I can't TELL you you have autism because of the scope of the group, BUT I can say that everyone came into this group suspecting something, and I CAN tell you that your suspicions are correct, and that everyone would also benefit from looking into an ADHD diagnosis." So, uh. I guess that can go on my goal list for this year, get the ADHD assessment done up and see whether or not I want to look into medication for that. (Probably no meds, but maybe? I dunno. That's why I need the assessment etc!) ADHD is not something I had considered for myself before, but apparently when you smush both autism and ADHD together, you get a weird co-mingling of symptoms that are neither one or the other but a secret third thing? And when I started looking at how the three options (autism only, ADHD only, AuDHD) stack up, it was very much a "well fuck, that is me" kind of thing. If I do have ADHD, I definitely want to get that officially DX'd, simply because it is the safer one to have on the books these days, and I want to have SOMETHING to point to if I need accommodations or anything at some time in the future.

Passed the tax class, passed the level up test, so now my business cards are already out of date, lol. Started doing some of the self-led classes for the next level up. Do I even know if I'm gonna want to keep doing taxes after this season? No, but learning new shit is always fun.

Physio continues; had a follow-up with the rheumatologist for some reason unknown to either her or me, so that was a wasted $90 copay. She had me try a different anti-inflammatory, but it was definitely not as good, so I switched back to what I was on before. Waiting on the referral to the hand specialist, and will probably follow up with the office tomorrow since insurance and everything switched with the new year. The carpal tunnel doesn't seem to be doing any better (if anything, worse), but the tendonitis definitely doesn't feel as bad. Wondering if time of year/weather has any impact, because it was late Jan/early Feb last year that I finally was like, fuck this I can't do buttons I need help, and we're getting there again and my hand are hurting worse again.

I've still not made it to Six Flags; we thought about going yesterday, but then it was rainy and I had the service last night, so it didn't happen. 

We've been on mini-hiatus for Shakes, because we had someone who was going to be busy on Christmas Adam, so we smooshed Pericles into back to back weeks. Next up is Cymbeline, which is another kinda weird one, but a bit more normal than Pericles. I'm trying to get as much casting done over the break as possible, for all plays upcoming, since once tax season starts I have no idea how things are going to go with free time and brain space. (this is why I asked everyone to check their calendars and put the dates on the list so they would know and not schedule something else, heh.) It's hard to believe we're almost done with another entire round of the plays, and also starting year six. Wild. Also, kinda nice that we started in 2020, because it makes it easy to keep track, haha.

I feel like I only ever talk about the same very few things, which should maybe be a goal for this year: find something new and different to do? I saw that the Discworld's animal (?) of the year for the Roundworld is a Curious Squid, and I also saw a post about going on JOURNEYS OF DISCOVERY, so maybe that shall be my theme this year. Me and the Curious Squid, going on Journeys of Discovery. More to come, after the Year Compass gets filled it, perhaps.

With my tax class! We're chugging right along, and while I like to complain about not having enough time to absorb all the info, I think I'm actually doing okay. I made it through this chapter's case study perfectly well and without any errors other than one typographical one. (but it didn't change any of the numbers to the point that I had a mistake in the final rundown) So that's exciting. I do not understand why the fuck we need 17 dozen different ways to depreciate property but whatever. No one consulted me. I would have just said, pick a method and stick with it.

I had my second meeting with my new therapist this past week, and I already like him better than the last guy. (He's the first therapist I've ever had who has specifically asked me if I feel safe working with him.) It helps that we get to meet in person. It also helps that the new office is way more proactive re: insurance than the old one, and went ahead and contacted medi-cal FOR me and so I no longer have any out of pocket costs to get my brain therapized. That is... huge. I wish my other docs and therapists of various types would also work with medi-cal so I could do that, because wow, not paying that every week is so stress-relieving.

Physio continues apace. Currently, I am working on keeping my shoulders up a little, which apparently really isn't that much even though it feels like my shoulders are up by my ears. But yay, my shoulder blades, particularly the left one, are hanging lower that they're supposed to be. I asked if the new postures that my therapist is having me work on will ever just become natural. Supposedly they shall. Eventually. If I keep practicing. Sigh. I still haven't heard from my PCP re: next steps, so I need to make an actual effort to send a note or call and be like, Hey, 'sup? What do?

A friend has offered to take me to Six Flags on Sunday, and to buy me a yearly pass so she has someone else to go to the park with. I hate being poor and feeling like I can't reciprocate, but gosh I love having friends who are willing to pay for things just so they have some company. We'll see if Sunday actually pans out - with tax class and time change and having to discuss Escapade stuff with someone on Sunday, I'm just not sure the hour-long schlep each way will be worth it, especially since I wouldn't want to stay too late since I'd have class the next morning. Damn you, schedules!

Speaking of chatting with someone re: Escapade stuff - do any of you have any experience with amps/receivers? We need a new one, as the one we've had for years is finally going kaput, but it's been absolute yonks since I paid any attention to audio equipment, and even when I did, it wasn't all that much attention. We don't need much; we only have a subwoofer and two regular speakers, but even those may be replaced if we have the dosh and the information for what to replace them with. 

Also also re: Escapade - if you don't already attend, and you enjoy slash fiction and/or media and/or making shit queer, you should consider attending. It's great fun, full of wonderful people, and is just a lovely long weekend. It's a bit earlier this year, mid-February, which makes me a bit anxious about whether I can get off work or not, since I also need to take off for Gally (promised I'd help a friend with her booth before I got the tax gig confirmed). But fuck it, I say, we ball.

I need to try to get back into a regular schedule again. Having physio at weekly changing times does not help with that, alas. But it would be nice to have a routine again.

Not even Shakes has been falling into normal routine lately. We finished Antony and Cleopatra last night, which is such a... DRAMATIQUE play. Everyone is just so DRAMA all the time. Especially the titular characters, heh. Antony takes like, what, a scene and a half to DIE after he stabs himself? We decided he must have stabbed himself in the foot for him to be able to continue yammering on and on and on as he did. 

Next play will be Coriolanus which is... dense. I remember the first time I saw it performed, I got absolutely nothing from it and was like, whyyyyy would anyone want to read this? That was in... 2003? It was when I was NNY, so probably 03, yea. And then the Hiddleston production came out, so I was like, okay, fine, I'll re-read the play before watching it, because if Hiddles sees something worth performing in the play, there's probably something there. And yeah, yeah, there is. And it's not just the blatant homoeroticism. I'll be interested to see what, if anything, anyone else has to say about it, since most of the current crew didn't read it the last time we did it. (I think it was one of our Saturday reads, because the prior cast list has Euc, and v, and Manka on it. (Man I miss having them read with us.)

RIghto, class in the morning, so best go honkshoo.

Happy Mid-Autumn / Reunion Festival! My mooncakes are waiting for me for once I finish this, so it's gonna be quick-ish - 

Guardian Wishlist reveals happened today, and I got two AMAZING presents! 

1) From tazzy_deputykitty this lovely Lost Tomb Reboot fic featuring all of my favourite boys getting to be (mostly) soft and reassuring themselves about each other's safety, archiveofourown.org/works/71779526

and 2) from gavilan a podfic! Of my work! Whaaaaaat how crazy cool is that? https://archiveofourown.org/works/71590231

I only managed to get one gift together this year, but I rather like it if I do say so myself. For ishipallthings , a fluffy slice of domesticity and caretaking, To Hold and To Have, because I will never turn down a punny title when one presents itself.

Righto, time for mooncakes. I have many things to update y'all on, but they will wait!

It's been a hot minute. I still don't have any goals set for the year beyond my media intake goals. I had fully intended to take the two weeks post tax-season and pre-May to ponder those and come up with a plan, and yet. In reality, I took those two weeks and mostly slept and read and recovered from tax season.

The biggest news is also the newest news: I bought a car to replace Sidney! I'm going to miss Sidney a lot, but he's so old and obsolete and mom has apparently been worried about him dying on me for some time. I ended up spending a good chunk more than I had hoped to, but I got the extended warranty and LIFETIME oil changes, so I figure that helps. Anyway, it's a Hyundai Tucson, 2018, with only 67k miles on it, which is pretty darn good. Prior rental car, so it's been extremely well-maintained. And it's BLUE. Colour was like. Least of my concerns, but I am very happy to have gotten something that wasn't silver/grey, heh. I'd also been hoping to be able to swing a hybrid, but honestly, there are so few cars on the lots right now, and nothing is cheap.

Been working on cover letters again, blah. Got two turned in last week for part time gigs, and am poking at one still that's a full time gig. All three are remote, which I'm kinda pleased by. I'm still trying to figure out what the heck I'm gonna do with my life, sigh. But with how depleted my bank accounts are now with the car buying... I gotta find something quick.

We've had a lot going on with the house lately; we had a water pipe leak back in April, and once that got fixed, our insurance was like, yeah so either re-pipe the house or get an auto water cut off. After talking to our plumber friend, we decided a re-pipe made the best sense since, y'know, the pipes are all ancient and if one went, the rest might go any time too. So it's been a lot of construction and bang bang and saw saw and dust and ugh here for the last few weeks. Final inspection should be either Monday or Tuesday, so now it's just paint and try to get everything back in order again. We're taking the opportunity to do a lot of cleaning and de-cluttering too, and re-organizing, so that's actually a good thing. It's just impossible to find anything in the house currently, because just about every room had SOMETHING going on in it. One of my wall hangings seems to have entirely disappeared. All three of us were wandering around this afternoon looking for one thing and none of us could find it.

Shakesnight is resuming this week, and honestly? I'm a little less than excited. Many weeks it feels like more work than fun, what with people backing out last minute for whatever reason, and then I'm left trying to figure out either a ringer or a re-casting situation. It's most frustrating when it's something that they could have told me about in advance but didn't. In any case, hopefully no one disappears last minute, because I've now cast this play three different ways with different numbers and arrangements of readers and I'm done. I am, however, looking forward to Shakespeare Inna Park, because that's always more fun. People! In person! In a park! Fresh air! Pets! Food! We haven't decided on a play yet, so we should probably discuss that soon.

I feel like nothing has really happened in my life in the last I don't know how long, but I'm sure things have happened. I just.... have little to no focus these days.

Borrowing this chengyu from guardian_learning because it is incredibly apt today: 内忧外患. One damn thing after another, everything's fucked (lit. woes inside and out).

I am sick. Good news: not covid. Bad news: still have a slight fever and very little voice.

Worst news: my great-uncle passed away today. So now in under 12 months, I have lost four aunts & uncles. I suppose the good (?) news is I'm running out of relatives to lose. This was mom's uncle - mom has always thought of him as being much like a second father, and he's really been more of a grandfather to me and my brother than our actual grandfather was.

I'm tired. I'm tired of things happening. I'm tired of having to find a way to survive all of the things.

I'm tired of having to be professional and kind and understanding to people twice my age who just bitch and moan and complain about their jobs, which they have agreed to do, which they have the ability to leave, which they are being paid well more than I am to do. I'm tired of being harangued for not reaching goals that are entirely out of my control. I'm tired of being told I need to do more when I'm already stretched too thin.

I'm tired of losing people but I know there's no stopping that.

Sigh.

Just a week into the year and I already feel super far behind. Typical. I set a bunch of lofty (for certain definitions thereof) goals last year, which I don't think really went well. Let's take a look.

Goals for 2024:

• Media Intake
  
  • read at least seven books, no more than two of which can be re-reads (final count: more than seven, but I didn't track all of them so the final count is uncertain)
  • finish at least six dramas on my watchlist (final count: 17!)
• Unfuck My Habitat
  
  • bedroom
    
    • redo the closet and dresser de-cluttering
    • comics TBR pile: read, sorted, put away (mostly read, some not read because I'm missing/waiting on key issues)
    • books TBR pile: read, put away (no longer a giant pile on the floor! but still unread!)
    • meet up with bookstore friends to give away books etc (books ended up going to goodwill, I think)
  • workshop
    
    • good lord I don't even know where to start with this one (did one decluttering round with Helen, still needs work)
• Health Shiz
  
  • walking regimen? do a schlep with Megan? monthly hikes? (started out strong, ultimately failed)
  • actual work outs again?
  • finally actually for reals talk to my dr re: top surgery and hysto (on depo shot, waiting to hear from Medi-Cal re: eligibility/change to insurance to decide whether to go ahead and do top surgery)
• Work Shiz
  
  • social media/marketing for BBI
    
    • weekly posts through January
    • 2x weekly posts Feb-Dec
    • 3x weekly stories through January
    • daily stories Feb-Dec
    • check out the differences between Square website and weebly website, make switch? rebuild? ugh.
  • jewelry/chainmail classes at Mystery Shop (these went well! need some tweaks, but want to continue again post tax season)
    
    • figure out projects
    • figure out schedule
    • figure out pricing, equipment, etc
    • actually do the damn things
  • keep applying for jobs
  • kick ass at the temp job
  • work as many Starlight gigs as possible
  • help Boss re-build/re-brand and start kicking ass again post baby and break-up (boss was not ready to do this)
• Creative Juices
  
  • please dear god let those creative juices start flowing again (yes I know that's not a goal shhhhhh)
  • use the swirly grey-black fabric for a vest (possibly a shirt as well, if enough fabric)
  • make one new jewelry piece per month
  • write that goshdarn GYADL fic I've been braining about for nearly a year now
• Human Interaction
  
  • return to weekly update posts (mostly did this)
  • continue hosting Shakesnights
    
    • live from LA, it's Shakespark Round 4!
  • crafty playdates? hike playdates? aim for monthly?
  • come out to the parents
• Language Acquisition
  
  • keep up weekly writing sessions
  • weekday Du Chinese (add to schedule at a set time?) (not as much as I should have, but mostly!)
  • make use of the apps you've paid for, dummy (not as much as I should have, but some)
    

Well. The least successful parts were the creative parts, which, considering how unexcited I've been about crafting of any sort lately, is unsurprising.

I've yet to think about future plans, but I'm giving myself until Lunar New Year to get all of that put together. Everything feels very AAAAHHHH right now, not least because I lost another family member yesterday. I suppose this is what happens when your dad is the youngest of 9 and is already 80 himself, but losing two so close together, and three in a relatively short time span? It's hard.

I'm attempting a bullet journal, but I'm not sure how well that's gonna go. We'll see. I guess there are a lot of things I'll be figuring out as I go, even more than usual.