Hardbodies 2

I normally consider myself a bit of a tough guy when it comes to enduring bad movies. Somewhat in the way alcoholics build up a tolerance to hard liquor, I have a thick skin against terrible cinema provided there are at least a few redeeming moments. Inspired by nostalgia for late night cable TV, the only way to see nudity and real debauchery as a kid in the '80s, I decided to watch this wreck on an ultra cheap DVD. But it hit me a Mike Tyson (circa 1987) uppercut. I couldn't watch all of it. It's THAT bad. And I can enjoy basically any CANNON GROUP production (horrid cheeseball '80s action producers) ever made! A much better movie that accomplishes somewhat of what they were trying to do here is Summer Lovers featuring a very young Daryl Hannah. Or the original and much better Harbodies.

The entire premise of these '80s airhead summer teen sex movies is naked flesh, but at least some of them had a certain level of comedy or sexiness. But nothing here is funny, or particularly sexy. Brenda Bakke is absolutely stunning, but no one gets to do anything worthwhile because the movie is a failure from start to finish. I guess simply admiring her beauty is worth something (and most starlets did not have fake body parts back then, which is very refreshing). But overall, life is too short to watch movies like this. Or review them. Hey wait.....I just wasted.....uhh THE END.