Renfield: Alright! Forget cell phones, forget iPhones, forget PowerBooks, forget iPads.
Stacy: Yay...
Renfield: Now, I can do everything I want with my iPad mini.
Stacy: That looks just like your phone...
Renfield: But it doesn't make calls. I got my tweets, I got my emails, I got my friends, I got my alerts, I got my Angry Birds...
Goody: So as the day progresses you can read thousands of unsolicited messages, advertisements, and the mindless brain vomit of acquaintances...
Stacy: Someone sounds hormonal, maybe you're pregnant too!
Goody: Ugh, its so annoying, you have to keep learning to use new crap that doesn't actually do anything better than the old crap, which is incompatible with the new crap, all so that you can have blogs and watch fake teenagers and real housewives, and its all happening too fast and I'm tired! I'm just sick and tired of it all!
Stacy: It's OK, we don't have to get the iPad mini.
