Payment Clause Is Coming To Town

On the twenty-second day of Advent the WoffBoot brought to me ... a fat man with a white beard.

And he's ho-ho-homicidal!

Pass, the Ogres on the Left Hand Side: Ogre Kingdoms vs Warriors of Chaos

A Scheduling Oversight!

It's All-Skype Fight Night!

After a number of failed attempts over the last fortnight, and a memory failure on my part, Kraken and I (Kas) broke out the dice and battleboard for another EndTimes-esque battle. In a break from tradition, I will be writing in normal font, and will leave Kraken to be bold.

I certainly am Bold. It's the real-life equivalent of Stubborn. Which I also am.

This time we would be playing non-Legion lists (Ogres vs Warriors) but would be trying the (now standard) composition rules from Archaon book. 

This is a format I had experienced before. Many years ago Leofa and I had played a game of this format; affectionately referred to as "Billie"... Why you may ask? "Because we want to!" (click only for nostalgia)

Belly Good Show: Ogre Kingdoms vs Legions of Chaos

We've posted a lot of battle reports recently, but this has something new: both protagonists in the same room. Not to mention the same country.

A mid-week sojourn to Kasfunatu Towers, and so we rounded up a few of his multitudinous armies to put together a 2400pt End Times battle.

Forces

Ogre Kingdoms

What my army lacked in imagination, it also lacked in originality: a big mass of Ironguts, stuffed with characters. The magical equipment was mostly aimed at keeping them alive, relying on their own stats and great weapons to do the damage. I also took the Rampager's Standard, because I figured getting off the charge might be important to these guys.

On top of that: a couple of units of Leadbelchers (who always seem very handy), a small unit of Mournfang, (because I have Monstrous Cav envy), a lovely Ironblaster; and a couple of Sabretusks, continuing my ongoing quest to understand how to chaff and redirect properly.

One very big basket, and a whole lot of eggs.

• Tyrant: Great Weapon, Heavy Armour. Trickster's Helm. Talisman of Protection.
• Slaughtermaster: Lv4 Heavens, Dispel Scroll. Talisman of Preservation
• Iceshard Blizzard, Harmonic Convergence, Curse of the Midnight Wind, Chain Lightning
• Battle Standard Bearer: Heavy Armour, Ironfist. Rampager's Standard
• Butcher: Lv 1 Great Maw, Ironfist. Hellheart.
• Trollguts
• 12 x Ironguts: Great Weapons. Heavy Armour. Full Command. Lookout Gnoblar. Dragonhide Banner.
• 4 x Leadbelchers: Light Armour. Leadbelcher gun. Musician.
• 4 x Leadbelchers: Light Armour. Leadbelcher gun. Musician.
• 3 x Mournfang Cavalry: Heavy Armour. Ironfist. Champion, Musician.
• 1 x Sabretusk
• 1 x Sabretusk
• 1 x Ironblaster

It's a little more of a power list than I'm used to taking, but I knew Kas would be playing the new Legions of Chaos rules, and is not adverse to a bit of power build himself. Also, the last time I beat Kasfunatu was April 2012 (four losses, two draws in the interim), so I had my eyes on the prize.

Wrecking Ball: Warriors of Chaos vs Ogre Kingdoms

Turn Up The Hype!
It's All Skype Fight Night!

Good evening and welcome, Fantasy Fans! I, General Kraken, shall be writing in the plainclothes of normal text.

Why hello again; I, Kasfunatu, shall be writing in unsubtle bold.

Very little fancy for tonight's match, a straightforward rough-and-tumble throwdown pitching a horde of ogres against a Tzeentchian warband. But just to give it that distinctive Woffboot flavour, we'll be using Blind Deployment and Secret Objectives!

I really liked the blind deployment and made me reminisce over setting up behind screens of cardboard boxes. Can we do this again?

Yes!

Forces

WARRIORS:

Your usual, General Kraken? A pint of Chaos Warriors and a packet of chariots? Why thanks, don't mind if I do.

Mark of Tzeentch, a Chaos Lord: Mark of Tzeentch, Hellfire Sword, Scaled Skin, Soul Feeder, Talisman of Endurance, Disc of Tzeentch
Burnward the Crisp, a sorceror: Level 1 Lore of Fire (Fireball), Dispel Scroll
Withnails Iniseyes, an exalted battle standard bearer: Talisman of Preservation

18 Chaos Warriors - Shields, Gleaming Pennant
15 Chaos Marauders - Flails
A Chaos Chariot

A Gorebeast Chariot with Mark of Tzeentch
A Warshrine, similarly marked

A Chaos Spawn, same mark again

Oh my boys, my boys, we're at the end of an age!

I hear that a disc-riding combat monster is a decent goer for WoCs, so I reckoned I'd give that a go. I didn't know who I'd be fighting when I chose the list, and although I was mostly horrified to hear it would be Ogres, that Hellfire Sword was a great pick to bring against the multi-wound monster men.

Mind you, the lord would have to do a lot of heavy lifting with it to earn his points back, and I'd be running very light on magic. And most of my guys weren't really tooled for bear (lucky I'd be fighting Ogres, then), so I wasn't looking forward to combat as much as I might usually do. All the same,  I reckoned with a bit of luck, I'd got some tough stuff to hit the ogres with.


OGRES:

Graznak, Butcher Lvl 2 (beasts): General, gold sigil sword, dispel scroll  - 175
Fuj, Bruiser - BSB, Dragonhide banner, heavy armour, brace of pistols  - 194
Lummo, Butcher Lvl 2 (maw): hellheart, ironfist - 188

15 Ogres - Full command and lookout gnoblar with ironfists - 515
5 Belchers - Musician - 225
1 Ironblaster - 170
1 Rhinox - Champion, heavy armour, ironfist, brace of pistols - 131

Talk about yer monstrous regiment. I didn't think I could proxy this fully, but I managed with the tactical use of terminators. For which I'd doubtless pay later. 

The list was one of a pool of unused 1600pt lists that we rolled randomly against and was built not knowing who it was going to face. I really like playing this way for random friendlies.

If you want beasts, you need a second butcher, and we are ogres, so we need a bsb... so the character choices were made quite quickly. The gut butcher cast some spells, but only when I had spare dice and their effect had no bearing on the game; probably could have been lvl1.

I had never tried the dragonhide banner before so wanted to try that; and it made sense to be in a horde; it may suit guts better, but I then had to sacrifice the blaster if I wanted a horde, so went with bulls... I wanted my moving cannon.... I did not move it all game!

I do like the single rhinox champion and against this list it proved a pivotal (lucky) choice in one combat.

The hellheart is a given (but was not actually used).

With hindsight/foresight and knowing my enemy list, I would have dropped a few things and squeezed in a second rhinox. Although would not favour that as a general option.

Four Whorsemen

I suppose, grudgingly, that Slaanesh ought to have some kind of representation in my army. I've got marks for the other three. It goes against the grain, though. Tzeentch 'til I die, yo.

I said I had the parts, so here they are. As ever, you can play 'spot the Giant parts' throughout. You could consider my whole army a long and drawn-out Giant conversion, actually.

A unit of four, giving me a set of actual chaos ogres rather than relying on the goodwill of my opponent to let me field a minotaur, a troll and two ogres in Empire gear as such. The other chariot horsehead got a sprue pole covered in marauder flail heads and a big shield made from a Mierce base with a warshrine icon stuck on. That's as near to a banner as this lot are going to get.

Savage Orc Tournament, Day #2: Fools Rasher In

vs Ogres 

This was more promising, Skullfink thought. Ogres weren't like those other sneaky armies: they got stuck in for proper bashing, orc-style. He was so pleased to see the brutish mobs lumbering towards them, he dropped the Foot of Gork on the Ironguts as a welcome.

The surviving Ironguts took fright at this, but just to show there were no hard feelings, the other ogres responded with a couple of cannonballs that peppered the boarboyz and felled a few Big 'Uns. Marvellous fun!

After the formalities were over, it was time to get to the real business of the day. Da Bone 'Eadz were set to dance with the Bruiser-led Bulls, and Skullfink would hate to arrive underdressed. With a swift prayer to Gork, he acquired a pair of monstrous fists that fitted over his mitts like outsize gloves.

The Big 'Uns crashed into the Bulls and started thumping away. Skullfink's massive fists wielded a pair of delicate fencer's blades (long-since looted from an elf corpse) to cut a bloody swathe through their enemies. To his left, a unit of boarboyz also tried to charge down the cannon-wielding ogres, only to disappear in a cloud of grey smoke, leaving only the smell of gunpowder and barbecued pork.

What remained of the ogres quickly gave up the fight and were run down, but Skullfink did not have to look far for more dancing partners. The rhinox-driven cannon smashed into their front, just as the recently-rallied Ironguts thumped into their side.

In a frenzy of attacks, the savage orcs beat down and chased off both units, before calling down Gork's wrath to crush the remaining Leadbelchers.

Skullfink lifted his ramhorn helmet and wiped the sweat from his brow. Now that was a battle!

Battle of the Unexpected Gun Lines

EMPIRE (Stylus) vs OGRE KINGDOMS  (Kasfunatu)
3000pts
27/01/13

Ogres at the top, Empire at the bottom. That blue biro on the right is not to scale.

The armies lined up in two huge flat lines almost filling the width of the canyon. Watchtowers guarded either end of the ravine, and the remains of gated paths could still be seen; in the centre a small oasis and a few trees had blossomed.

Despite the empire being more prepared and the ogres still yelling and bawling and hitting each other into position, they very quickly turned to action and started to charge across the battle field catching the empire by surprise.

Woffboot VI - Dogs of Empire v Ogre Kingdoms‏

"They're gonna kill us," said Sergeant Ricardo. "They're gonna cook us. And they're gonna frackin' eat us!"

Commissar Pendleton ignored his Schiltron officer and looked around at the battered remnants of the Enterprise of Campogrotta. It had been a hard campaign: thrashing the greenskins and those lizardmen had brought them within touching distance of their goal. But facing the ratmen swarm had cost precious time, and they had barely escaped with their lives against the vampire's nightmare host. It was time to cut their losses and go home.

WoffBoot VI - Ogre Kingdoms vs Lizardmen

M'grash, at camp, picked the last of a morsel of food from his teeth with a rat femur. They were a little stringy, and not much meat on each one, but thankfully the general of the Skaven had thought to bring so many that the ogres had fed well.
A worried K'mang entered the butcher's tent and explained that the supplies were running low. The ogres had feasted well, and were getting restless. There must be more of the meat out on the field of battle, so M'grash picked up his crown and spiked glove and stormed out of the tent.
"Right boys, we is 'eading back to the field o' battle; thoz runty rats tasted alright, but there werent much on 'em..."
K'mang picked up her beard and strapped it to her face, preparing herself for battle. She prepared a potion just in case she bumped into any more of those pesky vampires; and readied herself.
M'grash led his boys back to the earlier battlefield but there other interlopers who had perhaps found the same find.
Hideous blue skinned reptilian creatures skittered and picked at the corpses.
"OI! Thems my pickings lizard boy"
That was enough of a battle cry that was needed for the hungry ogres, and the bulls moved forward. The mammoth followed up ponderously, tusks swinging as its heavy feet shook the ground underfoot. The belchers, still conscious to prove themselves after their defeat with the spiders earlier were careful to lag back, loading their cannons.
As soon as the lizards considered moving the belchers lit their fuses and aimed roughly in the general direction of the bigger lizards and closed their eyes and hoped... KABOOM!
When they opened them again, two of the cavalry were falling down the hill cripped with axeblades and other weaponry embedded in them.
K'mang, passed one of M'grash one of her brews, who necked down the tasty brew and the hardy gruel tasted good.
The cavalry charged down the hill towards M'grash; and crashed into the ogre.

WoffBoot VI - Ogres vs Skaven

Warlord Quoff of Clan Slavish surveyed the valley before him; some kind of human shrine building off to his left, a wooded area to the right, and a path in the centre up to the hilly area ahead of him.  It seemed horribly familiar.  That was it!  He'd faced the Orcs here all too recently when travelling in opposite direction.  He was lost. 

Without warning, Wayl, his weasley lieutenant, cried aloud and pointed across the valley.  Before he knew it the Ogres had closed to within charging distance of his slave packs and the jezzails on the right were obliterated by cannon fire.  On the left flank, the jezzail team made a beeline for the chapel, in the centre the slaves side-stepped to reveal more of the warpstone weapons (which unloaded into the tusked mammoth) and the main bulk of the party moved cautiously down the hill towards the Ogres. 

The enraged mammoth, not happy about being shot at, charged and broke the slaves on the left flank, causing the nearby jezzail teams to panic and flee the field.  Thankfully, the cannon and winds of magic favoured the skaven at this moment and, save slaughtering a couple of slaves, did nothing. 

The Ogres backed up.  The slaves edged forwards.  The Ogres backed up.  This couldn't continue for long as the Ogres were being pressed back up the hill.

Meanwhile on the left flank, jezzail fire came from the building.  At the same time, the mammoth squealed in pain and the jezzail team ran from the building, clothes ablaze.  It was not going well.

The Ogres, realising they were cornered, now chose to charge with all they had.  It was over in short order, a counter charge by the slaves on the right flank doing too little too late to turn the tide of fortune in favour of the Skaven.

After hiding amongst the numerous bodies of fallen slaves, Quoff, with Wayl following closely behind, skulked off into the woods and licked his wounds.  Today had proved most costly.  He had never much liked being above ground.

WoffBoot VI - Orcs and Goblins vs Ogre Kingdoms

Dawn rose over the valley to the earthquaking thumping of a great mammoth romping down the hillside. To his right a collection of cannon wielding ogres, and on his other side exiled Butcher M’grash.

M’grash had failed to follow in the traditional line of gut magic and was sent on a fool’s errand to search for this item he had never heard of or cared about. Grabbing a handful of loyal ogres that he could scare into submission, and charming one of the camp’s farmyard animals (the mammoth) he had left the camp and headed south to the Border Princes.

M’grash summoned his retinue to stop, spying on the hill the other side of the valley the unmistakably height of a giant’s shoulders lolling along; the giant appeared to be bellowing along to an orcish song.

Signalling his men to prepare themselves, the ogres charged down the hill. M’grash sent his cook and cannon wielding friends down the hill on the flank, however unbeknownst to him that there were spiders hiding in the woods.

The valley they entered must have once seen some incursion as the winds of magic avoided the place like swirling eddies in the chaos and left the ogres unamused.

Orcs turned to face the interlopers and also turned their attention ready for a scrap and jump down the hill. Goblin archers pulled their bows, but in their eagerness to shoot a target got themselves confused and failed to do anything. The giant followed down the hill, and a large contingent of goblins appeared form the trees.

 

M’grash summoned what little magic remained in the area to infuse his body with the power of the beasts and commandered his men to march forward. They were keen, but even ogres are wary of giants, and they did not move with the gusto that M’grash expected.

A problem of Brobdingrabian Proportions

So here was my problem, right - I know damn well that many of the opponents my O&G mob will be up against over the next few days have a nice selection of monstrous infantry available to them. Not just the Ogres - although they're clearly the worst offenders - but horrors like the infamous Black Coach of the Vampire Counts, Skaven Rat Ogres or the jolly inclusion of Kroxigor amongst the otherwise worthless Lizardmen skinks.

Drawing on the 'ready to play' list Gen. Leofa kindly provided me, I couldn't really see anything that I could field to deal with them, other than a solid defensive line of goblins to cover my pre-emptive retreat, of course. So I panicked, pulled out all my teeth and hired this chap.



Allo. I'm ungry.

This is Brob. He'll be playing as an aggressive midfielder, flexibly moving between defense and offense as the moment requires. Had I been thinking in advance, I'd have taken more pictures of him as a work in progress - he's one of Gen. Kas's stable, and more usually runs with the Ogres, hence the tattoo of the Great Maw on his midriff.

Some works in progress

Now I have a [machine] gun, ho-ho-ho

Hit em up, move em out, roll em out... RAWHIDE

Scared yet? you should be... you should be