Still awake.

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Not for long.  Had hoped to get things arranged so that I could be to church, maybe twice.  Health has just not been cooperating.  Weather sort of sent things into a spin as well.  Not dying, I don't think, just not able to control sleep.  Or get out.  I needed to get to confession.  And, even if late, I will, before long.  It is how we are supposed to do... preferably monthly, at least quarterly, though certainly yearly.  I... don't do it that often.  I don't do anything as often as I am supposed to... visiting doctors, of various sorts, taking medicine, eating.  Not... a choice.

If you are getting out to church, say a small little prayer for me.  Not... literally... for me... more, in my stead.  Just thank God for His patients, and sacrifice, for forgiveness, and many good things... including people who will speak for me, in my stead.  He knows why I am not there.  This isn't a mystery to Him.  He knows things you can't know.  I don't fear His anger, about this.  I just like to show Him I can still visit, if vicariously.  I think He likes that I still try, in my odd little ways.

Well?

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Still working at things.  Hoping to make sure the first load is dry.  The fold that.  Checking on what is air drying while at it.  I did get a basket of things to take upstairs for now.  Some are blankets, which are still fresh, where folded a while back.  Would like to get them in those airtight bags.  Hmm, though really, some of those things should just be folded with the others.  Or... before.  Those won't be done for a bit.

I did get the bigger dirty dishes washed.  Some larger copper bowls, for egg work.  I'll... need to buy lemons, and use lemon and salt to shine them.  Neglected, for as expensive as they are.  Really keeping at things.  As well, changed two of the fermenting jars, soaked and washed those once.  Doing them one more time.  Then into the dishwasher they go.

Not much?

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I just wasn't able to get to things.  I may put the dishes away, I did run one load.

I did reheat chicken.  As well, had corn and peas.

Getting there.

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The laundry, first load still, has just been set to a final spin.  Thirty minutes?  Will find out.  So, obviously, the second load is going nowhere until then.

The dishes were finished.  So, I pulled them and put them all away.  And started loading for a next load.  Don't have enough quite yet.  Still, two loads through, and up.  Not bad.

Well, there is that.

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I woke up around midnight, a bit before?  Took a shower.  Set up dishes.  Reset laundry, and now will go change that around.  Brush my teeth a final time then on back to bed.

I made a run to the post.  Was something in?  It was.  So, I got that, and the rest of my mail.  Then, being out, went to town for a bit of food.  Wasn't sure.  There were two places open, I got food.

Alpha?

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Sigma.  Contest?

Laughed, I did.

Good?

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A bit achy?  Hunger, just a nibble of that.  Tired, still, on the edges.  Though I must admit, getting to things is very difficult.  Just... doing... anything seems to be very difficult.

Still, I started a load of synthetics first thing.  And will do another load after that.  Though a shower between them?  Why two?  Well, colors.  Yes, even lighter synthetics will take color from darker, especially new, synthetics.  I saw a good price on synthetic base layers, and wanted to compare those with the merino wool ones I bought earlier.  An $80 price difference.  Though, my guess, is that each will have a better time for use, and way.  I have medium and heave merino wool ones, the synthetics were only offered in one weight.  I tried them on, one set.  It fit, so I want to wash them before really running them through their paces.  And... I had several other synthetics to wash already.

I'm not sure I believe.

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But the... notification arrived?  I'm too tired to think.

Or argue.

Awake a bit before nine.

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Down between one and two.  I just couldn't get to bed, no matter how tired I felt.  Trying to just stay seated upright drew all the focus I could muster until... I finally... broke the spell?

Sleep was good once it started.  I slept more warmly than yesterday night, but it is already 38 outside?  So it is simply warmer.  I didn't have the door to the downstairs open.  But I did leave the furnace up at 72.  A conscious, if not better, idea?  Oh, but I am no longer turning the furnace higher.  I am starting to keep it at just 72.  Spring is here.  At some point, I may turn it down even to 68.  Though, if I do that, I won't boost it during the day... as long as it is in the mid 30's out there, I should be fine.

Dreams, thoughts.

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I still remember this.  Never watched the movie.  Didn't need to?  Or... did I?

Does it matter?

Down before 16:00.

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Not awake until three?  That's a crazy lot of sleep.  Perhaps the very little work I did yesterday was more than I had thought?  Maybe.  All I know is sleep was good.  Waking took... just a bit of effort.  I had the alarms set for two and four.  Couldn't make it up at the two, dreaded the four.  Three... worked out.

As well, I set up dishes this morning.  Not perfectly.  I did order some of those larger busboy pans.  The dish pans I have are far too small for my large pans, and even my medium pots.  good only for dishes and flatware.  I don't use dishes, so much, at this point.  If that may be changing.  If I can get ahead of things, figure out the dish washer... or more begin using it quickly.  The difficulty is that I am just one.  And only eat once or twice a day, sometime skipping meals for a week as well.  So... getting enough dishes to put in... takes time.  Ugh.  Too many, to few, always something.

Right.

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That was a lot of cat litter.  But, finally, got the litter boxes emptied, and that out to the bin, then the bin out to the roadside.  About killed me.  I... have gotten weak.  Still, all good.  As well, I reset the best litter boxes.  I am considering keeping all three in play now?  Or just two?  If I keep up on them, they aren't too bad.  Though, perhaps three would just be too much to juggle?  I'm... thinking.

I enjoyed the last of the soup, and coffee.  Water until just a bit ago, then I went in for tea.  I played the game a bit.  But... ran out of steam for even that.  So went to reading, looking, listening.

Midnight waking time, again.

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So be it.  Sleep was good.  Waking was easy enough.  Not a bad world, or time.  Well, no pain anyway.  A bit sleepy, weary, even exhausted.  I can't play games all that long.  I just... burn out after a half hour or so.  Mostly just drifting around the internet, looking for something.

I was glad to see Trump moved the swearing in ceremony to a safer venue.  If... he actually did that.  Difficult to know.  Wiser than I thought, if so.  He really is a showman.  Perhaps having a public ear piercing taught him something, and maybe allowed him to understand that his security wasn't... his.  Oh, they would have cried over the spilled milk, if he had died.  But... either were chosen for their incompetence, or were in on the gig.  Still, indoors.  Good.  And, probably well out of the zone intended.  How many democrats were going to be in attendance?  Jews?  Can I see your hand, friend?  Just... curious.

Had hoped to be awake earlier.

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It just didn't work out.  I was expected to do something, and I failed.  I doubted I could go, but I might have been able to send something.  It just didn't happen.  Alarm clocks be damned.  I didn't even hear them.  Not sure why.  Though that isn't completely unusual.

Just a bit of work.  Very little, tiny bits.  But several.  Resetting water, and containers... one for now anyway, for they r.o. system.  Really, the goal is to have two or three half gallon jugs of the stuff, plus keep the carafe full.  So that making tea, having soup water, or such, is... possible, in multiples even at the same time.  I will say, tea and coffee taste much better with water run through that system.

Mockery, commiseration, a nod, or else?

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The sense of things.  I... don't know if this is a reaction to my last post, or... something else.  I... don't see you, but I see what you suggest.

By which name do you suggest you know me?

Hmm?

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After seeing else, I... saw this.

You... don't hurt me, or matter.  Right?  Even a broken clock clocks it true twice a day.  I... don't mind.  Not... sure which one you are?  Doesn't matter.

Why the feminine.

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I have been being plagued by the feminine.  Oh, not a terrible thing, really.  I've certainly been plagued by more terrible things.  Still, I had to ask myself why.  I have been considering the problem for a while now.

No, witches have no power here.  Save any allowances I might grant.  Granted as sisters, mothers, daughters, not as dark practitioners.  I can shut down darkness easily, and do.  I think even they know it.  Not a grace, the price of... being... a certain sort.

One stone hurt the most.

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Some things hurt more than others.  I thought I wanted the least of the pain, maybe not for the full cost?  Death seemed easier than... being called?

Not thrown, spoken.  The dream confounds.

Nearing noon.

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Totally baked, smashed, crashing.  Still, will push as far as I can.

Reminds me of when I used to drink.  To be honest, because of this?  I honestly don't think alcohol was the problem.  Some days, no matter, I feel awful.  Though... I drank to find relief, and sometimes that followed through from the time of drinking to several days or weeks later.  Sometimes not so much.

To understand.

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A dream.  Oh, I... know.  At once, I thought He did as He did to spare life.

It wasn't true.  He was sparing souls.  Many.  The life was just an extra.  Maybe even the point of salvation.  But it... wasn't the goal, just the means?