All of Life Is a Garden

I believe I am not a product of my environment, but rather that I have created my identity through my reactions to it. In an age that rewards “political correctness” over personal integrity, this is not always a popular choice. Growing up poor, abandoned by my father, and living in a culture that viewed divorce as scandalous, I was considered socially inferior. Society had given me the perfect excuse to fail, a perfect alibi for misdeeds because of my “background”. Even well intentioned people who demanded less of me than I was capable of served to reinforce that as a victim, I was somehow not to be held accountable for my actions, to bear no responsibility for my choices. My attempts to overcome that social stigma seemed a betrayal of my mother in some respects. It seemed I was judging her as well. At times, I chose to rail against the unfairness of a society that would judge a young woman and her children for the actions of an irresponsible and woefully flawed man, who was himself little more than a mere child at the time he disappeared from our lives. Other times, I would read biographies of statesmen and heroes. I wanted to see how they overcame adversity and stigmas. What I learned that at some point they made a choice to do just that. The men who taught themselves to read by candlelight to better their chances triumphed over their circumstances. If they had made such a choice to effectively change their destiny, I could to!

I took notice of the sunflowers my grandfather grew in his garden. When the sun hid itself from them, they turned their own face to catch the rays of life giving light. Likewise, the little flower bush whose flowers were tightly closed in the mid-day sun, opened fully every night in the cool of the evening. I began to see that each flower in the garden has its own destiny and purpose. The trick was to learn how and where I could thrive. Both the mid-day sun and the cool of the evening were circumstances beyond the control of those plants. However, reacting appropriately to their environments was within their capacity. The same creator who made these simple plants gave them the means to survive had also made me. He would not have thrust me into any situation without the capacity to survive and thrive. I had a choice, and I chose life!

I believe every human being is born with a spark of the divine–given life by a loving creator and created for His pleasure and glory. Each and every decision I make either helps ignite or extinguish that spark a little at a time. I bear a sacred responsibility regarding others in my lives, because I can help or hinder their life choices. I love listening to the stories of others, and everyone has one, and getting lost in the story in their eyes. Listening to the dreams, fears, ambitions, hopes of others, and helping them move a little farther along a higher path is my calling. I absolutely believe I am a spiritual being, that I have an eternal soul, and that I am simply clothed with a body for this season of life. I cannot earn or buy salvation, but I can, and shall, choose to live in ways that show appreciation for the gift given so freely at Calvary.

Much of my grownup life has been spent catching petals dropping from the flower of my youth. Whatever will I do with them, make a sweet, sweet potpourri, a bright collage, a wreath to place upon the tides that ebb and rise upon the seas of my life? It is better to plant a garden, using memories as seed, with flowers of love and faith and hope and possibilities!