petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
Where I've been: You may know me from [archiveofourown.org profile] petra or [tumblr.com profile] petralemaitre, with some fanworks up at [squidgeworld.org profile] petra. I hang out on Discord, and if you're interested in connecting there, drop me a comment. I'm currently namesquatting at petralemaitre @ bluesky. I was petralemaitre @ Twitter before Musk bought it and petronelle @ LiveJournal, both defunct. My pronouns are they/them/theirs.

What I post: This Dreamwidth primarily chronicles my fannish existence. If you are visiting because I signed up for an exchange, you may be interested in my narrative kink list or my feelings about various potentially erotic kinks in fiction.

My current project: This post has details on how to get me to write for you by donating 25 USD worth of money to: 1) a food bank or food to a food pantry in your area (in-kind food donations also count), 2) Doctors Without Borders/Médecins Sans Frontières, 3) an organization recommended by Stand With Minnesota, 4) the American Civil Liberties Union, or (relevant as of 2/28/26) Equality Kansas for emergency help for trans people whose drivers' licenses have been suspended for being trans.

I like interaction: If you comment on a post or story of any age, I will be glad to engage with you even if I don't know you. If I read your story, I will leave you feedback.

My fanworks: All my stories that are fit to post are tagged here and crossposted to [archiveofourown.org profile] petra. As of 4/27/25, you'll need an account at Archive of Our Own to read my works. Leave me a comment with an email address and I will send you an invitation, no questions asked.

I've written many things in many fandoms, and I think these stories are representative of my best work. If you are interested in downloading all of my stories, here is a .zip file that was last updated January 3rd, 2025. I would love to hear from you if you download it. That's not archive-locked, but it's also not up-to-date with the latest works.

Blanket Permission: if you want to do anything to my stories or posts that you would do in a fannish context to any other kind of source text, please do: podfics, sequels, remixes, critiques, DVD commentaries, translations, and the like are all fair game. I'd love it if you let me know. Caveat: don't feed my work to an AI and ask it to write more. Human ingenuity is great; computers' most likely next words are empty.

How to find stories I like: my recommendations, my AO3 bookmarks, my works, and the resources I use when I am looking for something to read, all in one long-winded post.
petra: Text on a blue background: "The only way to go on is to go on." (DWJ - The only way to go on)
I have started a repository for PDFs for Poem in My Pocket Day that I will share starting on March 15th. If you have any PDFs of poems formatted to be printed and you would like to share them -- especially if it's your poetry -- then hit me up at petralemaitre at gmail dot com.
petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
Anxiolytic bugs me. Every time I look at it, I have to remember that it means "relieves anxiety" instead of "causes anxiety."

I suppose you could say it makes my temper [in]flammable.

This post brought to you by learning that someone I know has recently been prescribed Cymbalta without any of the "Quitting this might suck beyond the telling of it" warnings.
petra: CGI Obi-Wan Kenobi with his face smudged with dirt, wearing beige, visible from the chest up. A Clone Trooper is visible over one shoulder. (Obi-Wan - Clones ftw)
I am a completely psychologically normal individual and the part where I had, until I posted one of them yesterday, two active WIPs started in the last couple of weeks in which my blorbo loses his virginity to, in fact, the same person, under extremely fraught circumstances, is simply because I love joy.

Definitely nothing to do with VirginWan Weekend posts having filtered onto my Tumblr dash for weeks and inspired me to greater heights of appalling Obi-Wan/Anakin.

The one I finished is: i want to raise a city behind his teeth (for when the AO3 comes back to us). It’s identity porn, Petra stylée, set the day Anakin is knighted.

The one I am still working on is your classic Obi-Wan in a Time Loop trope, except he’s repeating RotS and he only gets one day to do it in.

It starts like this, and I am looking for an alpha-reader/cheerleader/audience. )
petra: CGI Obi-Wan Kenobi with his face smudged with dirt, wearing beige, visible from the chest up. A Clone Trooper is visible over one shoulder. (Obi-Wan - Clones ftw)
i want to raise a city behind his teeth (9422 words) by Petra
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker
Additional Tags: Virgin Obi-Wan Kenobi, Loss of Virginity, First Time, Coming In Pants, Oral Sex, Intercrural Sex, Anal Sex, Rimming, Infidelity, Identity Porn
Summary:

Obi-Wan celebrates becoming a Jedi Master and Anakin's knighting by thoroughly ridding himself of his virginity with Anakin's assistance; Obi-Wan mourns the loss of his padawan and consoles himself with several partnered orgasms. Anakin contributes to both sets of emotions.

petra: A blonde woman with both hands over her face (Britta - Twohanded facepalm)
I hate this timeline )
petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
I'm working on identity porn for tomorrow because the Virginwan Weekend over on tumblr has it as a prompt, and y'all could've knocked me over with a feather when I saw it listed. A fest for deflowering my blorbo, and it has my word? OMG!

Even though what I meant back when I arguably made the word up (c. August, 2005 | Fanlore) and what the AO3 tag means do not tend to coincide.

My version is "A and B know each other extremely well. They have complicated identities -- maybe secret, but not secret from each other. They kink on acting out a subset of their identities for each other."

I am writing My Kind of Identity Porn on the occasion of Anakin's knighting.

It goes like this. )

*

Tagging this put Patricia O'Callaghan's cover of Leonard Cohen's "I'm Your Man" in my head, so here, have Charmax's awesome femslash vid to it.
petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
REPORT: Mark Carney calls Canadian Men’s Hockey locker room to offer consolation RRSP advice from The Beaverton (US : The Onion :: Canada : The Beaverton) has left me wanting a conversation between the venerable-but-still-kicking former POTUS Jed Bartlet and Mark Carney, at any point in the last umpty years.

I can't write it by myself because a) I haven't watched TWW in over a decade and I was also stoned at the time, b) I have only a layperson's grasp of economics, and c) I watched and enjoyed Mark Carney's speech at Davos but that's all I know about him.

[profile] wernnaa suggested starting with a Planet Money episode to give them something to talk about, but I haven't been a regular listener in years.

Would anyone like to a) adopt, b) coauthor, or c) beta this bunny if I attempt to write it?

(Jed, in my reading, is not heterosexual because Leo McGarry is Leo McGarry, but I am not at all sure he'd hit on Carney or v.v.)
petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
A friend was talking about dissociation in show tunes, so I got my Anthony Warlow on this morning -- Jekyll & Hyde - Confrontation, in which he sings a duet with himself as Jekyll vs. Hyde, and City of Angels - You're Nothing Without Me in which a hack writer sings a duet of loathing with his noir protagonist.

Next up, The Nausea Before The Game / Love Me For What I Am from In Trousers, the former of which does a bang-up job with "Oh, I am supposed to be having sex with the person. Um. Sure. I can. Do that! It sounds like. An. Idea. A GOOD idea, I mean. As opposed to... not my thing."

And if you need to know whether Imelda Staunton can sing, the answer is Fuck Yeah. National Theatre's Follies, "Losing My Mind," a song of obsessive love with a moment of complete executive dysfunction.

*

I am not up-to-date on the great project of making musical theatre about anything. Do you have a favorite show tune about dissociation?
petra: A blonde woman with both hands over her face (Britta - Twohanded facepalm)
Epstein files )
petra: Don McKellar with a scarf, looking superior in black and white. (Darren - Dubious look)
Pity and Terror (463 words) by RiaSaun
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Slings and Arrows, Medea - Fandom
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Characters: Geoffrey Tennant, Darren Nichols
Additional Tags: Humor, Drama
Summary:

Darren sells Geoffrey on a production. This is inspired by Petra's "Grace and a Cod-piece."

*

This was inspired by one of the first fanworks I ever put on the AO3, back in my Slings & Arrows heyday. It has an excellent use of Darren Nichols' off-kilter genius.
petra: Text: I'm a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous green rage monster. (Tony Stark - Green rage monster)
This post is about Erotica 4 Barbarians, a challenge to write smut in words of one syllable.

I neglected to include all the Marvel characters I could write, in part because I did not think it through, so -- Wade, I already mentioned, but also Steve, Nat, Bruce, Thor, Clint. (I just heard [personal profile] minoanmiss cheer and punch the air.)

Anybody who wants a flashback to 2012 Avengers fandom, The Avengers Kink List Team Bonding Sessions: the files is a collaborative project that happened in my comments back in the day, in which we played with all kinds of Avengers pairings.

If anyone wants more in that vein, I will see what I can do to scrape off the rest of the MCU and chill in that headspace. In words of one syllable.

\o/
petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
I was backreading one of my tumblr tags looking for a joke, and I refound https://www.spidersge.org/ which is, I promise, not a rickroll.

This DW post has the Spiders Georg reference I was looking for. Since that posting, my friend's partner has gone into remission! Yay!
petra: Text: "There's nothing magic about words," he said. "They just do things if you say them right." (DWJ - Nothing magic about words)
Suicide and book banning )
petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
The main post is here.

What I said:

Let's write smut in short words for the spring Fools' Day! This will be a lot of fun. For me. And for you, too?

A list of folks I could write from my works is next. If you see a pair, group of three, or big group that you want me to write, drop me a line!

Cut for length (that's what he said) )
petra: Text: "Gotta be one around here somewheres. Try the liberal call, boy." (Bloom County - Liberal Call)
Take action today because the public comment period on two gender-affirming care bans at the federal level closes 2/17. Anonymous comments are allowed. More details at the link.

ETA: If we share a fandom, I will write for you if you make a public comment on this subject. If you make two, I will write for you twice!

See this post for details.
petra: CGI Anakin Skywalker, head and shoulders, looking rather amused. (Anakin - Trash fire Jesus)
If Revenge of the Sith happened on Tumblr (871 words) by Petra
Chapters: 7/7
Fandom: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker, Sheev Palpatine & Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker
Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Sheev Palpatine | Darth Sidious, Padmé Amidala, Obi-Wan Kenobi
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Tumblr, Drama, Crack
Summary:

Anakin gets swept up in the discourse.

petra: Paul Gross smooching a skull (Geoffrey - Smooching Yorick)
CanCon, for the uninitiated in the ways of Canadian media, is Canadian Content, a percentage of which is mandated in Canada in much the same way Animaniacs used to have edutainment chunks, and for much the same reason -- the betterment of the public.

Noncon CanCon is when you're trying to avoid all mentions of That Show and it still crosses your social media feeds.

Dubcon CanCon is when it's Hudson Williams doing a photoshoot.

I am not going to throw a CanCon Consent Fest because I feel obligated to read everything people submit for fests I run and a) I don't wanna have to read fic for the gay hockey show and b) Noncon generally moves me in the direction of the back button. But if someone else throws a fest, I will write dubcon for at least two of my Canadian fandoms.
petra: Leia Organa and Han Solo bickering in an icy hallway (Leia & Han - Hoth)
Virtually ethical (500 words) by Petra
Chapters: 2/2
Fandom: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi
Additional Tags: Tragedy, Quintuple Drabble, Hurt No Comfort
Summary:

Obi-Wan is usually pretty good about listening to what Anakin is saying, but not always.


*

Blastin' and laughin' so long (750 words) by Petra
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars Original Trilogy
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Leia Organa/Han Solo, Lando Calrissian/Han Solo, Leia Organa/Luke Skywalker/Han Solo, Chewbacca & Han Solo
Characters: Han Solo, Chewbacca (Star Wars), Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa, Lando Calrissian
Additional Tags: Crack Treated Seriously, Han Solo Shoots First, Humor, In-Universe Meme
Summary:

How "Han Shot First" came to be a meme in the Galaxy Far, Far Away.

petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
I was despairing of the 73% of American Republicans who are on team GO ICE in a poll NPR just published asking whether ICE has gone too far -- and the 7% of Democrats and 29% percent of Independents who are with them.

[personal profile] hannah talked me down by pointing out that, as discussed in the linked conversation, 27% of Illinois voted for Alan Keyes over Barack Obama, which was patently bananas.

I remember a certain male role model in my life talking up Alan Keyes. This does not increase my faith in his understanding of politics, or indeed his inhabiting of the same planet I do.
petra: CGI Obi-Wan Kenobi with his face smudged with dirt, wearing beige, visible from the chest up. A Clone Trooper is visible over one shoulder. (Obi-Wan - Clones ftw)
Even you can be copacetic (400 words) by Petra
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker
Additional Tags: Drabble Sequence, That's Not How Any Of This Works, Romance out of order, Try again later, A+ Jedi Pedagogy, Obi-Wan Kenobi's A+ Parenting
Summary:

In which Anakin and Obi-Wan go from having wild sex to talking about important things, but not immediately. Inspired by a Tumblr post about a non-traditional progression of intimacies.

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petra: Barbara Gordon smiling knowingly (Default)
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