happiness

Overcoming the Poison of Society’s “Success”
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Overcoming the Poison of Society’s “Success”

In the pursuit of a dream, we will stumble across many “poisons” that attempt to deter us, weaken us, and make us doubt our dream’s capability and legitimacy. Like a physical poison, it’ll work through your system and slowly kill any hope of passion and confidence.

One of those poisons that has haunted me quite a lot is the perceived notion of “success” that is intentionally-unintentionally pushed on us from society. Well, it is half the time, and then the other half is our own self-imposed notion. There’s different factors that we may deem “successful,” and it can slightly differ amongst us, but overall it involves the same concept. And, ultimately, it results in us believing that because our lives don’t match this picture, then we’re not successful.

First of all, this is all this “success” is: a picture. An idea. An ideal imagined by generations of a collective culture that has changed and merged and intersected so much we’ve lost track. So this picture of “success” has changed an insurmountable amount of times. It’s irrelevant. It’s pointless. There’s no need to pay it any attention.

Here are a few things to dwell on:

  • What makes you happy?

Now, if having a certain income or marrying well or climbing the ladder to CEO or becoming famous is what makes you happy, then by all means pursue it! If none of that matters to you, then there’s nothing wrong or different about that. If you’re happy, or at least content, I’d say you’re doing pretty good.

  • Every path is different.

Even when two people are pursuing the same thing, they won’t do it exactly the same way. And both are valid and equally successful.

  • What’s better: satisfied others or satisfied you?

What’s so great about living a life that others demand and being miserable and bitter all the time? I’m sure you’d rather be pleased with yourself. Now, this doesn’t mean you don’t listen to wise and well-meaning advice from those you trust and who know you well, and this doesn’t mean you don’t practice humility and sacrifice (after all, Character comes before dreams). But also don’t forget to listen to your own gut. Even in the midst of presumed certainty, your gut will never lie.

  • Society knows nothing of you.

You know you. Your family and friends know you. What do they say about you? What does your heart say about you?

  • Divert your thoughts when they dwell too long on this “success.”

Thinking too much about this will only make you lose hope and energy. Have a plan to divert your thoughts to something more productive, and something more positive. Choose a subject on which you will habitually think about when your mind starts to wander into darkness (Philippians 4:8-9, “think on these things…”)

It’s Time to Change the Atmosphere
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It’s Time to Change the Atmosphere

There’s a small, very small, percentage of people who are truly content staying in the same place. That’s generally those who are 50 and older. I don’t mean staying in the same job or living in the same house. I mean staying in the same place, whatever that may be. Mostly physical. If it also means something emotional or psychological, changing the physical can often be the catalyst to a healthy emotional or psychological change. There comes a time when changing the atmosphere is a stronger need than a want.

When should you change the atmosphere?

“Well, when you’re unhappy, of course!”

Not necessarily. When I’ve been unhappy in places or situations, I consider the holy struggle that I believe is mine to share with Christ, and that’s to be put in circumstances that are either meant to help me grow or help someone else. If we left everything that ever made us unhappy, we’d be going on an endless, futile journey. And everyone is made happy by different things. Happiness is important, but it should never be the main thing we consider when we want a change of atmosphere.

A change of atmosphere is in order when you see an end to growth. If you wake up and realize that you are the same person that you were last week, a lightbulb should go off. A healthy place is a place where you are growing, lots, and if you’re not, then it’s time to move on. Also, if you discover that no one has been positively changed by you being there in recent history, then that also should trigger a lightbulb. It may be difficult to separate the absence of purpose from the absence of happiness, but that’s because the two usually go hand in hand. If you are feeling unhappy, take a deep look and try to figure out why. If it’s just because you want to escape some problems or you can’t stand a certain person or you want to try something new,  maybe it’s not the best to go just yet. But, if you really believe deep down that you are not growing and no one else is growing, then consider making a change of scenery.

The pursuit of change and growth is always a good thing. What creates problems is if the reason for change is not necessarily a good thing. Remember, character comes before dreams. 

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A Poem A Day #459

A Day to Myself

I once spent a day to myself,
And it was a day I’ll remember.
I was ill, and happy.
My head swarmed with heat,
But there was nothing necessarily 
Wrong with me.
I forgot, for a few hours,
What the sun felt like,
What the wind did to your hair
When it was loose and free.
I was trapped;
Nowhere to go, and no one to see.
I would sit, sit, sit,
And stare at the clock on my phone
Until it was time to take another
Pain pill. 
I was ill, and happy. 
And by five I was unhappy.
That was enough escape.
I needed people.

By Catherine Joy

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Project Inspiration

I have come to discover that I love to inspire and motivate others. I absolutely love it. It makes me feel warm and joyful and peaceful and all those good feelings. And I’ve recently come to realize something quite obvious: perhaps this is my purpose. 

I often wonder why it is God gave me the gift of writing. I’ve always known that our ultimate duty in life is to share his love with others and show him love, and our different gifts are ways that we do that. I’ve deemed the world of writing and literature as my mission field, and the written word is the best way I communicate (so much better than verbal). I know now that God ordained writing as the way that I share his love and show him love. 

I also always wondered why doing things like making homemade gifts and giving motivational advice to others made me feel so high on happiness. I believe that certain activities make us feel that way because they were the activities God ordained for us to share his love through. Now it all makes sense. I feel so happy doing these things because they were what I was meant to do.

Just a few days ago I established for myself a personal life project, called Project Inspiration. It’s ultimate purpose and goal? To go about inspiring and encouraging others, especially in the areas of pursuing their dreams and finding purpose. And I already have ideas of how I can do that, such as “Tokens of Inspiration,” crafty inspiring notes that are either regular or spontaneous, mass motivational text messages to my friends and family, inspirational messages on social media, etc. It doesn’t take a lot, and it doesn’t have to be flashy. 

I intend to take this project with me in my life journey, adding to it new ideas that can span a larger reach, like giving little gifts with notes to the homeless on the street, leaving gifts and notes for neighbors, sending flowers for the heck of it to a friend who needs a boost….there’s many ways I can show God’s love and inspire others. 

Why do I feel like doing this? Well, basically, I really want to. And I feel in my heart that I should, because it’s my purpose. I can’t wait to get started ^_^

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A Poem A Day #434

How can I show you
That what makes you happy is
What you need to do?

By Catherine Joy 

I’m such a big advocate for pursuing the dreams one has on their heart, and it often frustrates me when someone makes excuses to keep themselves stuck. I’ve made it a self proclaimed duty to inspire people in this general area.

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A Poem A Day #318

What does a Photo capture?

In four little corners
There is held a number of tales;
Stories, adventure,
Past and present fails.
What does a photo capture?
Frozen moments in time,
Cold or warm memories
That are once again mine.
What is it meant for?
To reveal earth’s beauty,
Or perhaps to reveal
The truth of one’s duty?
A reminder is held
At four little ends
Of who once were enemies
And who now are friends.
Thoughts and ideas,
A secret message told.
Yes, there are many mysteries
That a photo can hold.
What sort of feeling
Does this photo contain?
Does it capture my happiness,
Or does it capture my pain?
In a photograph,
love and art can thrive.
In a photograph,
History comes alive.
So, what does a photo capture?
In just four little edges,
There is captured a life,
And life’s small pledges.

By Catherine Joy

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10 Things that make me happy

These are 10 things that don’t just make me happy, but put me in a happy high. They have special places in my heart.

1. Receiving flowers. Despite what others say, that flowers are overrated, I will never be bored of them. There’s no need to try to be creative. A bouquet is my kind of gift.

2. Drinking tea. I like to say tea is magical. The feeling it gives you is one of a kind.

3. Dancing at a wedding. That’s one of the special times I’ll become a different person and come out of my shell.

4. Cold weather. And if it snows, it’s not just a miracle in Austin, Texas, it’s like a dream come true for me.

5. Reading fiction and writing analytical essays about it. Yes, I love it. I don’t just love reading fiction, I love writing about it!

6. Writing poetry. Need I expand?

7. Pretzels. They are my chill snack. I eat them all day long.

8. Making crafts. It’s a special moment, when it’s just me and my desk and craft materials and music playing in the background. It’s like the world pauses, melts away, is forgotten while I sit and create. What’s even better: I forget my troubles for a time, and am completely immersed in the moment.

9. Reading. When it’s a really good book, like The Book Thief, I am very satisfied and pleased, and when it’s a sucky book I am very upset because I feel like I wasted precious time and energy.

10. Spending time with God. Now, this isn’t just said because it’s expected by either me or you, it truly is something that makes me happy. Actually, it’s what makes me the most happy. And when I come into those moments that I enter the utmost peace that I can ever feel, the affect is amazing.

What do you think of these ten things? What makes you happy?