I’m late posting this week. I’ve had quite a busy schedule this past week between dental appointment minor surgery and girl get-togethers, and of course, book-writing. So, I chose to grab a prompt off WordPress.
As writers, we all have our own time allotments for writing. And times differ for each of us. But I know my writing habits have certainly changed over the thirteen years I’ve been writing books.
I used to have a regimented standard schedule for writing when in midst of writing a book. I was disciplined. I ate breakfast, made a second cup of coffee and got to writing work every weekday morning for a few hours a day, sometimes maybe all day. But those times have changed drastically for me.
What’s changed since then? Ever since I lost my husband four years ago, I’ve struggled with discipline and concentration efforts. I’ve become easily distracted from my work. For the first year after losing my husband, I struggled to even get out a blog post, let alone book-writing. Heck, I was balancing on the edge of grief, and with a book already drafted, didn’t pay it any mind. It wasn’t until the second year of my grief I could begin edits and the publishing phase of my last book Fifteen First Times. Writing memoir is writing about real events that have happened, and sometimes those memories are painful to sit with for hours.
But all that time, I was writing because writing protected my sanity. But everything I wrote was about my husband, and consequently, I accumulated enough material for a book I very much want to write, but cannot yet stomach reading through those words. So, that is a book I will contend with in the future, when perhaps each word doesn’t strike my heart as badly as it still does now to reread what came out of me then.
When I finally made steps to get off my grief couch, about a year later, I forced myself to get out and join a women’s gym. It was the best thing that happened to me since losing my husband. I made new friends, who conveniently live close to me, got my health back in check, and my social life had picked up exponentially. Gym 3-4 days a week, taking 6-8 classes a week became what I looked forward to. Along with that came some lazy and social time, after classes, girl time with lunches and/or coffees, birthday celebrations, and social gatherings, became just what I needed to fill the void in my life. I’m a tactile person who craves live social interaction to thrive, and I got it. And it surely makes me feel better than sitting at a computer in my lonely world all day long every day.
I witnessed how quickly life can be snatched from us, and decided to join the land of the living. So yes, my book-writing slowed down, but I was okay with that because I was doing what my soul needed doing. I also began living by my mantra – One day at a time. With all my new anxieties, I learned to stop overwhelming myself with self-imposed deadlines and to just go with flow of me.
I decided to dedicate a few writing days a week for myself and took the pressure off of beating myself up for not being a disciplined daily writer. This change has been effective for me. It’s what works for me now, putting less pressure on myself. I mean seriously, thank goodness I don’t have to rely on my book sales to live, so the only pressure I have is the pressure I put on myself. Instead, I chose to put in some living and ‘me’ time in my life schedule as the priority, and I have no regrets.
I’m also happy to announce that my first draft of my newest book is almost at the finish line and hopefully will be ready for the edits by mid June, titled – About the Real Stages of Grief. The book is geared toward those who have loved and lost and all the stages of grief we all will experience at some time in our lives, which makes it a book that anyone can read. I truly hope it will help others.
What about you people? Have you noticed your writing habits changing over the years, or because of events in life that opened your perspective?
Daily WordPress writing prompt:
Daily writing prompt
When do you feel most productive?
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