Welcome back to my Life Lessons 101 series at the Smorgasbord. Today the subject I’m discussing is about the stress we sometimes put upon ourselves and finding a work-around how to deal with it.
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It’s true, we often create our own stress and anxiety, besides what life throws upon us. Life, as many of us knew it pre-technology, appears to be speeding up with what seems, many more things to tend to, and many technological interruptions that can delay our efforts when we must rely on them, especially for writers. As writers, we all have enough on our plates from life, but writers have more to contend with when it comes to living in a digitalized world. Sometimes it’s the digital upsets that hinder a writer’s efforts.
As writers, many of us know the anxieties which can grow when we have a writing deadline rolling around our brains, especially on those days where we can’t find our muse, or simply, don’t feel like working. Writing is ruled by the mind and no matter how much we wish to complete a project, the well inside may have gone blank or run dry. And as writers, we must re-organize, re-adapt, and return to, with a work- around eventually, so what do we do in the meantime?
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Pre-technology, writers wrote and submitted to publishers for publication. Since the Indie revolution came along, publishing our own work became a convenience. But along with it came a mountain of work for publication, because the Indie writer wears too many hats. For most of us writers, the writing is our pleasure – everything else that comes with it can be overwhelming such as: Editing, formatting, book covers, marketing, and of course, the time-suck of all writers – social media. Of course, if we want our work and books noticed, we must make them noticeable in the digital world. In the pre-digital era, writers wrote and publishers, agents, editors, cover artists, marketers, took care of the rest. For many writers, these extra hats we wear take up a lot of our waking hours. Even if we are well-organized and everything is planned out, we all know that often, things don’t run smoothly because of technical glitches that sidetrack us and must be dealt with in order for us to carry on our real work, writing. And let us not forget life. Life is full of surprises – both the good and bad, and often give us something to throw us off schedule. Have I mentioned enough things yet to cause anxiety?
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So, what have I begun doing?
I’ve adapted the ‘one day at a time’ approach since the past few years now. I’m a seasoned worrywart about everything, and life had given me plenty to worry about in the last six years or so. From the time my husband’s health issues came to surface, that’s where much of my attention was focused. Up to that point, I had put out a book a year, and two books in two of those years. Life was calm and my efforts were focused on everything writing/publishing. I had my set work schedule, and everything ran smoothly according to my projected timelines. But once life became more complicated, busy, and worrisome, I found my attention span for writing was slipping away. And during my husband’s long illness and his final passing, the urge to write felt like a distant desire. During that time, all my self-discipline to keep my working schedule going, had me in a tailspin about how much I’d have to catch up on after abandoning ship. Until one day, it sunk in how very short life really is. I allowed myself to reckon with the fact that I’d been through a horrible ordeal, so I stopped beating myself up about not producing books. And I also realized it was time to start doing more than just staying home all the time to keep caught up on everything in my life to-do list. I felt overwhelmed and wanted to just be more a part of the living and stop stressing.
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High anxiety on a lengthy to-do list that seems to grow with time, instead of lessening, had to be reined in. Things not done today are added to tomorrow’s list, rinse and repeat. Always worrying about tomorrow’s to-do list – usually more pronounced while trying to sleep at night. The pattern had to change.
One day at a time became my mantra. Because I’m a high-functioning multi-tasker who used to be so well-organized, able to follow three conversations at once, until I began feeling so overwhelmed and became so easily distracted and behind in so much, I had to change my fretting in my struggle to keep up and focus into a less structured style and take in more living, but still, remaining accountable to my work projects.
I used the ‘one day at a time’ plan, instead of the everything on my plate constantly plans. It subconsciously eases the weight of being overwhelmed. . . please read conclusion at Sally’s blog.
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