complicat

How shall we resolve last episode's exciting cliffhanger? Oh. A magic door. How convenient.

Rare for a Christmas episode to actually be relevant though, they are usually pretty much standalone.

And a reset too. It's May 23rd again.

I wonder if RTD decided that everyone must have a baby this episode or the actor was actually pregnant so they wrote it in? I hope it's the latter but the former wouldn't surprise me.

Anita has spent her days off from the Time Hotel looking for the Doctor and finding Eleven playing chess (did I miss that ep?), Three being tortured by Daleks and Fifteen dancing with Rogue, which seems to have pinged her gaydar.

These Seekers look like they're visiting an over-enthusiastic optician.

Anita seems to be all-knowing, which is probably just as well given how much exposition there is in this ep.

Did the Doctor just magic a change of clothes?

Belinda gets her memory back in the Time Hotel, and despite not showing any particular maternal instinct so far and valuing her independence she is apparently delighted at finding she has a baby she has no memory of creating rather than finding it at best weird and at worst creepy and a massive violation of her bodily autonomy. No matter though, all women love babies right?

Both the Doctor and Belinda are more concerned about Poppy than anythng else, which seems out of character for both of them.

UNIT gets it's memory back too.

"I'm wearing a suit."
"I'm wearing tweed!"
"I'm wearing nylon!"
Heheh.

Are we calling Rose II Rosie now? That would be less confusing but this Doctor does tend to give everyone a nickname.

Rosie didn't exist in Wish World because Conrad's tiny mind couldn't imagine her.

Hand wavy explanation for the Bone Beasts. They just thought they looked cool didn't they, and had too much Disney money to spend.

Everyone at UNIT wonders why the Doctor is suddenly obsessed with this kid.

Mel got a perm on her way into the office.

So much exposition.

The Rani wants to use Omega's DNA to recreate the Time Lords, because the Time Lords are infertile due to the Time War (I think). Otherwise what about Susan? Not that there's much chance of that Susan flashback being followed up any time soon.

I was wondering if Poppy was going to end up being the Timeless Child in some kind of ouroboros thing (since we've had a few Red Dwarf references recently), but no. We rehashed that nonsense for nothing.

Belinda only cares about Poppy now, sod reality.

Susan Triad builds a zero room for the Doctor so keep Poppy safe if reality reasserts itself. And if it doesn't she will stay in there forever with Belinda.

"I can't help you in the fight, my battle is in there saving my daughter." FFS. Belinda has had her entire personality erased and replaced with Mother.

"I was meant to meet you Belinda all for this, so that Poppy can live." So now Belinda's entire reason for existence was to produce a baby for the Doctor?

There's a faction of DW fans who complain loudly and constantly about finding everything Moffat does sexist but this seems far far worse from RTD.

Meanwhile Ruby has some actual plot to do - teleport to stop Conrad.

"Can I punch him?" Yes please!

UNIT HQ seems to have turned into a ship and has a wheel to steer it.

"I know you haven't arrived with a weapon - only a speech, some dazzling words, maybe a pun and then some lachrymose little tug-the-heartstrings mimosa-scented platitudes about the power of love."
The Rani has nailed the Doctor's MO there tbf.

What big claws you have Omega.

I'm not sure that cat flap is going to be big enough.

And then Omega just eats the Rani. How very disappointing. And if we were going to get rid of one of the Rani's couldn't it be Mrs Flood? She's had a good run and we've pretty much seen all that we need to of her. Would have been more fun to keep Archie instead. Ah well.

Mrs Flood sees that their grand plan has fallen apart, picks up the time ring and scarpers.

"So much for the two Ranis. It's a good night from me."
Did RTD bring back the Rani and invent biogeneration just so that he could do a Two Ronnies joke that barely anyone under 50 or outside the UK will get?

Let's wrap up the plot now then shall we? The Doctor uses the Vindicator as a weapon to blast Omega back into his hole, Ruby takes the Wish Baby and wishes Conrad to be happy and then to end the Wish, The Doctor finds her in the TARDIS (which was Conrad's prison) and the Doctor wishes for no more wishes.

Poppy lives. Everyone cheers, because now the whole of UNIT is obsessed with Poppy too.

Ruby's mum gets the Wish Baby, because what woman doesn't want more babies amirite?

I actually thought for a moment they were going to keep Poppy in the TARDIS and go adventuring with a baby in tow, which would have been fucking awful. Fortunately she disappears and the Doctor and Belinda don't even remember her.

This bit with the coat getting smaller and disappearing is actually quite effective. Are we to assume that Poppy shrank too though?

Ruby is the only one that remembers Poppy. Why? No one knows.

The Doctor chucks out the Star Certificate so that the robots will find it despite Earth not being destroyed and come and get Belinda. Wasn't it the exploding Earth that caused the time glitch that was integral to the plot in the Robot Revolution though? Hmm.

Anita is off back to the Time Hotel.
"They say hello, by the way."
"Who does?"
"The boss."
Hmm, how cryptic.

A few things have changed after the reality reset - the Norway/Sweden border has moved, teal is more blue, Ernest Borgnine is still alive and Conrad works in a bar. How does UNIT know these things? They weren't in the zero room and outside reality so how do they remember the previous reality?

I was worried they were going to use this as a way to change the mavity back to gravity but no, mavity forever!

Now Ruby can't let Poppy go, FFS. Her memory might be one of the glitches, but the glitches were real before the change so then Poppy must be real and must apparently now be immediately be brought back. By that logic UNIT should also now kill Ernest Borgnine, and make Conrad evil again.

If there's another dimension where Poppy is real (like the one where Rose is) then why not leave her there? Why insist on warping this entire reality around her?

Suddenly Poppy is the most important thing ever and Belinda is a baby obsessive again.

Only regeneration energy can shift time by the required 1 degree to change reality. Ah, I see where this is going. Also, are we not worried about any other potential side effects? No, only Poppy matters!

Surprise Jodie!

"I'm surprised it's not the other guy, he's always turning up." Heheheh.

"You're redecorated. I don't like it." Heheh.

"Did it really need to be bigger, in a room defined by it's bigness?"

This is probably my favourite bit of the episode.

The Doctor is about to endanger the whole of existence to try to save Poppy.

"Timey wimey." Oh no.

A bone for the Thasmin shippers.

The Doctor can regenerate at will now apparently.

He wakes up in Belinda's parents' back garden and Poppy is back but now 100% human, and apparently also now what Belinda was trying to get back to the whole time because her mum can't babysit today.

Lakshmi has a pain in all the diodes down her left hand side.

Belinda is staying with Poppy, because women with babies aren't allowed to go on adventures or have any fun.

Seems a bit risky to regenerate in the TARDIS doorway, what if the new Doctor falls out in their confusion? Also, sending all that regeration energy out into the universe might be a bad idea.

Unexpected Billie. Well that will annoy several of the right people.

Well, that was mostly disappointing, verging on maddening in places. The first time through I actually thought it was OK but with a few things I didn't like but on rewatch it's actually mostly things I don't like with a few things that were OK.

Once I knew where it was going I noticed much more how Belinda is completely sidelined in this ep. She has basically nothing to do except stand around holding a baby, while Ruby gets to do the action bits. And I absolutely hate how Belinda's entire personality is rewritten to make her suddenly care about nothing except a baby which she was brainwashed into believing was hers, everything else she has done is just thrown away and she's turned into nothing but a vessel for the Doctor to reproduce. Belinda deserved much better. And what was that thing about her lookalike descendent in the future? Came to nothing in the end.

And then nothing else matters either, it's all about the Doctor selfishly endangering the universe to get back a daughter that apparently is now the 'correct' reality despite not existing in the original one, but then isn't in the end his daughter anyway.

I had heard a rumour that Ncuti was leaving after this series but was hoping it wasn't true as it feels like we've barely met him - only two short series. Was not expecting Billie but suspect she's not going to be the actual Doctor, especially as she wasn't credited as The Doctor, only 'introducing'. While it's nice to see old faces again from time to time I think RTD has spent too much time delving into the past now. It just seems like he has run out of ideas and has nothing left except bringing back his old favourites again and again. Not sure what's really in DW for new fans any more - it's mainly nostalgia, expensive CGI instead of plot and character development and rehashing the glory days. Might be time for DW to take another break.