Colors Of The Garden: Humor

Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Winter Comic Relief

Rupert the Red-tailed Bluejay

You know Duncan and Dudley

and Percy and Vincent,

Corbin and Clarence

and Donald and Crispin

But do you recall

the most famous bluejay of all?

Rupert the red-tailed bluejay
had a very shiny tail

and when the others saw it
it would make them feel quite pale.

All of the other bluejays

Rupert always chased away

he wouldn't ever let them

share the food on his seed tray!

Then one snowy winter's eve

Sheba came to say,

"Rupert, with your tail so bright

you will be my meal tonight!"

Then how his friends grew merry

as they shrieked and sang with glee,

"Rupert the red-tailed bluejay

you'll go down in history!"

Alernate warm fuzzy ending:

Then all his friends came shrieking

frightening Sheba right away

Rupert the red-tailed bluejay

lived to see another day.

Postscript:

From that day on Rupert became a much nicer bird

and happily shared the seed tray with his friends.

And Sheba is really just a sweet pussycat who never tries to catch birds (uhuh!)

Footnote:
This little bit of tomfoolery was inspired
(with apologies to Rudolph)
when I took the top photo in December and it came out, by chance, with a red Christmas light superimposed on the bluejay's tail. Most definitely a cue for a silly song, wouldn't you say? :)
The other photos had to have the red tail added.

Happy February everyone!

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Winter Creeps In

Subtitled: Conversation with a Recorded Voice

Yesterday, trying to place an order for Christmas, I had a “conversation” with a prerecorded voice. You know those voices you hear at the other end of the line telling you this call is very important to them, and it may be recorded for “whatever purposes”, blah, blah, blah?

It went like this, after the initial intro:

If you’d like to place an order, say, “order”.

If you’d like to speak to Customer Care, say, “Customer Care”.

I said, “Order”.

The Voice said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that, would you mind repeating it?”

Now this is funny!

My hearing is less than perfect (perhaps a slight understatement), and I’ve made that same request so many times to people at the other end of the line. Here, now, was an automated voice saying it to me!

I repeated, “Order”.

I should note that my voice is very low at the moment because I’m still recovering from a humdinger of a cold, but I said the word loud and clear both times.

The Voice said, “I’m sorry, but I still didn’t catch that”.

OK. What next?

Before I could react The Voice continued, “Please stay on the line and Customer Care will be with you as soon as possible”.

Frustration!

The Voice: “We are experiencing longer waits than usual. Your call will be answered as soon as the next assistant in Customer Care is available. Your call is very important to us, etc., etc. ……..”

At this point I hung up and placed the order using my computer. No hard-of-hearing, non-human voices to contend with. Short and sweet.

As you can see by the above photos, winter is creeping in.

The gardens are wearing a light covering of snow.
Jasmine and Hannah spend a lot of time sleeping on the back of the couch.
Molly sits among the plants and watches the birds, when she's not sleeping.
A red squirrel routes around in the snow under the birdfeeders. We see so few squirrels that we always consider it a treat when one shows up. Be careful out there, Squirrel!
Chickadees and other birds delight us with their boundless energy.
We feel like to snoozing away the days like Hannah and the rest of the crew, but there's much to be done in preparation for the Christmas celebration.

Hibernation will have to wait.