since the beginning of everything

  And it's only Monday night. I meant to post a bit more often, but work takes so much out of me physically and emotionally... Retail, y'all. I love it but I hate it. I love helping people and I get to do a lot of it at my store. The managers keep asking me to do the store tour and floor training for the newbies, because as one of my coworker's put it "Fay's the best person on the floor". That sort of knocked me off my feet, honestly. I think of myself as "pretty good" but the best? Damn. I must be doing something right. I know I'm fast and efficient and I know where pretty much everything goes (or where it was the last time I checked). I'm not so great at getting people to sign up for the brand credit cards (zero, in the nine months I've worked there...) but I excel at almost everything else so I guess everyone's pretty happy with me?

  I just wish my body would stop hindering me so much. If it's not my hips being misaligned or the arthritis in my knees, it's migraines. The pain is only barely manageable, and often gets exacerbated because I just... can't give myself a break. It's stupid, but I'll push myself to the breaking point thinking "I can't stop now, there's still so much to do!" It's an exercise in compassion for myself to just take breaks when I need them, even if it's just getting off the floor and drinking water. Preferably while sitting but... I hate getting questioned about being in pain. I can't lie to people about my pain. I can laugh it off but I don't think it comes across right. Too autistic to fake it more than I already am.
  But hey, I got showered with compliments from coworkers and managers today. I've had Yuu at my side all day. I have plenty of material of my current special interest (Dishonored) to engage with and it's keeping me in a stable-ish form for the time being.