Grieving

I'm not sure what to say right now. I feel a loss that I can't explain. I only know two people that have gone through this. It's different than losing a child to death. I have bawled for the past 3 days and the tears just keep on coming. There's nothing anyone can do but pray for us. Today I have come to the realization that I need to let go of my Lily. If I am hoping for her return and it doesn't happen then I'll be more devistated. If I let go and she does return then it would be wonderful. If I never see her again, but she's living a good life w/her B-Mom then I guess that's the best thing for her. We are going to continue to finish up the baby's room and prepare for the next arrival, whether or not that be Lily. This is probably the hardest thing I've ever had to go through. I bonded w/her so much in the five days she was here. She will always have our love and be in our hearts forever!
It's hard to be happy and pretend that she was never here. I will always have Dom though. I just am Soooooooooooo ready for another baby, more than I thought. I am going to wash everything of Lily's and just start new!
There has to be a happy ending here! I believe in Fairytales and miracles. Dom was a miracle!
Please keep praying for me to heal. I want the tears to stop!
It think that painting the baby's room will help me heal.
Thank you all for your love and support and if you get any inspiration please let me know. It would help.

Sad News!

My heart is broken! I finally got a call from the Social Worker yesterday morning and what she said to me turned our world upside down. Long story short; the judge ordered Lily to go back to her BM. There was a credible witness that spoke on her behalf and said that she's changed. This should have been an open and shut case and the SW is totally on our side. They were blown away by the judge's decision. The SW came and took Lily last night.
There are strict conditions that have to be met for the BM to keep her. So, I am hoping and praying that we will get her back soon!
Please pray for us and for Lily's safety.

It's a GIRL!

Yes believe it or not we are new parents again! We just got the call yesterday. She was born yesterday (the first day of Summer) and we are suppossed to be bringing her home today! I've never had a baby so new! Dom was 2 wks old when we got him. Due to privacy issues and being a Foster Parent, I can only disclose so much info. This case looks pretty good at the moment. Both BP (Birth parents) are not fit to care for her. Her name is Lily! There's a story behind this name. For a long time now I have loved this name! Just two days ago I was gardening w/my mom and told her that some day I want a daughter named Lily and that that probably wouldn't happen because by the time we adopt, our baby already knows their name. So, when the lady from the Home Finders dept called and said her name is Lily, I just about died. That's a sign to me that we will get to keep her.
She was 6 lbs, 11 oz and the nurse says she's a petite little angel. I will try to post some pics (if I'm allowed) If not, then let me know and I will email you a pic of her.
Who guessed JUNE? Only two people did! Thanks for keeping the faith!

Disney Princess

Thank you Wendy for this! I am so into Disney Princess'. I think this one fits me well. Take the quiz if you like Disney Princess'.


http://www.greatestjournal.com/quiz.bml?Q=16354"> size=+1>You Are Aurora! (A.K.A. Sleeping Beauty.)

Thoughtful and loving. Authority figures probably have been sheltering you all of your life. Thankfully you' content center>
<>Which'>http://www.greatestjournal.com/quiz.bml?Q=16354">Which Disney Princess Are You?

Feeling The Blues

I haven't been upstairs to ck my blog or email for two days now. I am trying to be more productive with my days. It's hard though. This staying at home is harder than I thought. I love it, don't get me wrong. It's just lately I've been a little depressed. About what? I have no idea. It's hard to get out of bed and easy to stay in my PJ's all day when I don't leave the house at all. This weather is a big part of the problem, I think. I am looking forward to this weekend where much warmer weather will be here. I have been so cold in my house! I am cold in JUNE! Our heat has been kicking on in the morning's and evenings. I feel like it's winter or fall, not SUMMER.

I've been trying to read some uplifting books. I just finished the last book (A Dance to Remember) by Anita Stansfield. And coincidentally, this book deals with Depression of all kinds.

I've been really moody too and yelling at Dominic a lot. I try not to, but he's just getting so much more defiant lately! It's really difficult for me.
Not to get too personal here, but my Dad yelled at us kids a lot when growing up and I sense that the same thing is happening to me. I can't stop it, I just get soooooooo mad!!!
I am quick to appoligize to Dom and feel really guilty for having just yelled at him. Is anyone else like this? I see other gals in our ward and they seem to never yell at their kids like I yell at Dom. They are all so patient, it seems.
I do give Dom A LOT of love to outweigh the bad times.

I am proud of myself and Dom; yesterday we threw away his binkies together. He took his nap w/out it and went to bed w/out it. He's slowly forgetting about it. Today he did not take a nap.
I am trying to get Dom involved w/potty training more. I put him on the toilet maybe once a day. He's not READY READY yet, but getting there. I'm not going to push him.

Overall I am happy. I am excited to add to our family however long that may take. I am very grateful to be home owners, even though we can barely pay our Mtg at the moment. I always have hope that it will change.

So, I guess I could use some words of encouragement from my friends. Is it just me feeling the blues, or is it going around due to the weather?

Thanks for listening!

Broccoli Beef Supper and Wall Building

I wanted to post the recipe for our dinner tonight. It was really good; I was surprised! I only post the meals that I really enjoy since I am a picky eater. I think for this recipe, next time I will put ckn instead of beef. Oh! if anyone knows or can figure out what cottage fries are, let me know!

Broccoli Beef Supper

Ingredients:

4 cups frozen cottage fries ( I used one bag of steak fries instead)

1 lb ground beef

1 pckg (10 oz) frozen chopped broccoli, thawed

1 can (2.8 oz) frenchfried onions, divided

1 med tomato, chopped

1 can (10 3/4 oz ) condensed cream of celery soup, undiluted

1 cup (4oz) shredded cheddar cheese, divided

1/2 cup milk

1/4 tsp garlic powder

1/4 tsp pepper

Directions:

Line bottom and sides a greased 13x9 baking dish with cottage fries. Bake, uncovered, at 400 degrees for 10 min.

Meanwhile, in a skillet, cook beef; drain. Layer beef, broccoli, half of the onions and the tomato over fries.

In a bowl, combine soup, 1/2 cheese, milk, garlic powder and pepper; pour over top. Cover and bake @ 400 degrees for 20 min. Uncover; sprinkle with remaining cheese and onions. Bake 2 min longer or until cheese is melted.

Yield: 8 servings

Here are some recent photos of the wall going up upstairs. Vince hung the sheet rock today.

Looking up the stairs, this is what you see now.

That's the doorway to the baby's room.

This from inside the baby's room. I can't get a lot because it's small.

Sick Child

Well, yesterday started off as any other day until Dom woke up from his nap. He was burning up! I took his temp and it was 103.4. He was very shaky and pretty out of it. @ 3:45 I checked his temp again and it climbed to 103.8. I gave him Tylenol and Motrin and made an appt. @ the Pedatrician's office. The medicine kicked in pretty quick and was acting completely normal by the time I took him to the Dr. They didn't run any tests and guessed it was probably a virus, which I thought in the first place, but I don't take chances with Dom. The Dr. said that high of a fever was concerning and to watch him close. She said he should have a fever for the next 3-4 days and possibly followed by a rash or cold-like symptoms. So last night was filled with me giving Dom his doseges of medicine and I am so tired to say the least. It seems that his fever broke about 4am or so. I gave him his last dose of Motrin @ 5am and he was fine. He woke up late and feels normal. So I will just have to keep a close watch that the fever doesn't come back.
I will keep him home from church on Sunday just to be safe.

Flashback Friday

Dom was still in the hospital 2 yrs ago and here was a

sleeping pic of him.

This time of yr last yr was when Dom was

learning to use the walker, not walking yet.

The Roses are Blooming!

I just wanted to post a few pics of our Yellow Rose Bush that is blooming all over. These are the wild roses. Our pink Rose bush hasn't bloomed yet, but will any day. It was slightly raining yesterday and I went out and took pics in the rain.

A little piece of Heaven!

Jandre and I ran to the store yesterday and it had rained while we were inside. We came out and there was a beautiful Rainbow. I was so glad to have my camera on hand and was able to take this picture.
When I see rainbows it just makes me happy to see something so beautiful and colorful! It's like a little piece of heaven sent to us!

Asian Chicken and Noodles!

Tonight I made this recipe and it was so yummy! I used Yoshida "Sweet and Savory" sauce as my stir-fry sauce. This is really easy to make and doesn't take too much time. I would double the recipe next time to ensure leftovers and if you're feeding more than 2 1/2 people. Enjoy!

Ingredients:
1 package chicken flavor instant ramen noodles
1 bag (16 oz) BIRDS EYE frozen Farm Fresh Mixtures Broccoli, Carrots and Water Chestnuts (I just used an Asian mixture.
1 T veg oil
1 lb boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut into thin strips
1/4 cup stir-fry sauce (I used Yoshida's Sweet and Savory sauce)

Directions:
Reserve seasoning packet from noodles.

Bring 2 cups water to boil in a large saucepan. Add noodles and vegs. Cook 3 min, stirring occasionally; drain.

Meanwhile, heat oil in large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add chicken; cook and stir until browned, about 8 miles.

Stir in noodles, vegs, stir-fry sauce and reserved seasoning packet; heat through.

Makes 4 servings.

Riverfront Park

We had a pretty good weekend. On Saturday Vince, Dom and I went to Riverfront Park to see the water. The water level hasn't been this high in about 15 yrs! It was a beautiful day on Sat. There were a ton of people at the park and on the lower bridge below the IMAX. The Water was so high that it was spraying people on the bridge. Wendy, these pics are for you! Meet Riverfront Park in the Spring!

After the park we went home and I took some hamburger out to start dinner. We heard a big crack sound and then the lights went out. The thunder clouds were only on the southeast side of the house and the other side we had blue skies. It turns out that a transformer was struck by lightening on the corner of Cincinnati and Jackson. The power was out for 6 hrs just on the east side of Cincinnati and the west side of Hamilton. Crazy huh? Thanks to the Sherwoods' we were able to have some dinner and a fun night at their house. Thank you!

See our beautiful Park from a distance!

This was on the lower bridge. Look how powerful

the water is!

I couldn't resist a family shot with the water behind us.

Amazing!!

This is the spot where people were getting drenched!

Daddy and Dom on the Blue bridge. We were on

the bridge you can see below. You can also see where

it's spraying the people.

Incredible Power!

This shot turned out not too bad, I think.

Vince shot this pics of Dom and I with the Carrosel

in the background.

See the Ducks?

Another attempt at a family shot gone bad.

I love this pic with the storm clouds coming. It was

quite a thunderstorm too.

I was impressed with the pic as I used my optical zoom.

Me and my lover!!!

Dom was so afraid of the trash goat! It was kind of funny!

Daddy trying to cheer Dom up and get

him to like the goat.