Not ANOTHER Moment of Silence! We'll Miss You, Billy Mays

It took talent for this guy to pedal wares with such enthusiasm.

Would Someone Please Get Me to This Place in Taiwan

Thank goodness for CuteOverload.com

Something to Make All of us Happy

If I could capture the atomic energy in this performance, I could light everything up, but not in a bad way.

( Jerry Lee Lewis ) Great Balls of Fire
Uploaded by osoartico. - Music videos, artist interviews, concerts and more.

Another Moment of Silence

For Michael Jackson, as I remember him:

A Moment of Silence

Two entertainment greats passed away recently:


Ed McMahon:



Farrah Fawcett:






Which makes me:




Safe journey, Ed and Farrah.

Boys Keep Swinging and Swinging and Swinging

This is another video by The Dandy Warhols. A few posts ago I featured their video "Bohemian Like You." This video, "We Used to be Friends," references "Bohemian." Looks like two people are no longer in like and they keep seeing each other in the same room? I do not know the answer to this. The only reason I post this video, other than the fact that I like the song, is because of Courtney Taylor's hair. Courtney is the lead singer and does the whole thing beautifully. But, somehow, in the great universe of universes he has managed to pull off the tough hair thing, while looking absolutely cutieous.

Dandy Warhols - We Used To Be Friends
Uploaded by Pink_Bmx. - Music videos, artist interviews, concerts and more.

In order to balance my love for Courtney's appearance, I have to post something about Anton Newcombe, the lead singer of The Brian Jonestown Massacre, who is amazing and beautiful and funny, and he has awesome hair too. This scene is from the documentary DiG! All hail Anton, for reality.

View the Anton

Finally, here's the trailer for DiG! which features The Dandy Warhols and The Brian Jonestown Massacre in their knock-down-drag-out rock fest, some of which might have to be taken with a grain of salt or pepper. Regardless, see this documentary!!

N-A-U-S-E-A

I'm still experiencing nausea that I think is due to Cymbalta withdrawal. This is an actual photo of me trying to eat stuff. Whoever did these drawings really knows what they're talking about. I wish I could take credit for them. Anyways . . .

I desperately want the following:

Eggs Benedict
tempeh burger
peach cobbler
vanilla milkshake
Pecan Mudslide Treat (Sundae) from Dairy Queen
ice cream sandwich
frozen chocolate banana
caramel apple

Someone, for the love of Little Richard, get rid of this nausea for me.

I desperately want to be able to:

turn around fast (but not too fast and not over and over and over)
watch and play video games
watch TV shows and movies that are fast-paced
read a lot

Neda

I found this quote by someone replying to an article about Neda Agha-Soltan, the young woman killed during a protest in Iran. Apparently, she was watching the protest. Neda's death breaks my heart. I haven't been able to bring myself to watch the video of her dying. Here's the quote that I found:

"These images transcend any affiliation. Whether you see a patriot fighting for a cause or the disgrace of a child's life stolen as a father screams in horror, it does not matter. My tears run for her blood spilled needlessly into the gutter. My heart goes out to the father who watched his child die. These people are fighting for the very core beliefs Americans claim to embrace. You want to see freedom? Look into the eyes of that young lady as she dies. That's what it's about. These people are not just a symbol to their countrymen, [sic] they are symbols to us all. The next time you use the word 'freedom', [sic] remember Neda. I will. Tonight I will tell my children about Neda and her sacrifice. Please do her the honor of telling yours."

Read More: "http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2009/06/21/2009-06-21_neda_young_girl_killed_in_iran.html

Three Other Things That Tracy Wants: Get Me Globes and One Other Thing!

In my continuing quest to get things I want, here are two globes. Tah-Dum.

The Replogle 12" Globe (Franklin Globe?). And I think it's pretty accurate, showing that the U.S. is not the center of the world.

Oh, and Tracy would like to find a machine that identifies unintentional misuse of grammar and spelling. And she would like to be able to properly format her blog, or PLOG, posts even when the blog won't let her. Most of all, though, her own errors drive her up the wall. If you have the special machine to help her with grammar and spelling would you "give her it." I guess the machine is a live-in editor.


She will accept this shirt:



or Dave Gahan from Depeche Mode:








But she will not accept this. That is why she has spaced it as far down the post as possible.

Some of Tracy's Favorite Kid's Books

I love the following books and I'm trying to collect them again. I think the only one I don't have is Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs and The Muffin Muncher. I'll get it soon, though. I love how you can get these books so cheaply.

I could look at this book forever. It's kind of like Where's Waldo without Waldo.

This was one of my first introductions to poetry. It's a beautiful illustration of how to combine charming illustrations with fun poetry.

A boy takes his dinosaur to school. 'Nuff said.

I know that there's a movie coming out that's based on the book. I have a feeling I'll just stick with the book.

How can you not love a book where everything is turned upside down and willy-nilly.

Hungry dragon. Exhausted bakers. Beautiful. I think the book has been reissued. Fingers crossed.

In Keeping with the Special Father's Day Wish, I Present The Dandy Warhols in "Bohemian Like You" (Warning: MAY OFFEND).

Sometimes, I wonder if members of The Dandy Warhols ARE cool or if they TRY to be cool. There is a fantastic documentary called DiG!, which is about the love/hate relationship between members of The Dandy Warhols and The Brian Jonestown Massacre. It paints both bands as a bunch of jerks or saddies. Who knows. Regardless, this song and video ARE cool. It does contain nudity but, as adult-types, I think we can handle it, with all the kissy-faceness and hula hooping. The coolest person is the hula hoop guy. I want a hula hoop. I try MY best to bring YOU the best, even if it contains nekkedness.

The Hula Hoop guy is waving at me.

dandy warhols bohemian like you
Uploaded by scootexx. - Watch more comedy videos and sitcoms.

Happy Father's Day! . . . . ?

Keyboard Cat and His Minions

If you have trouble viewing the video I've posted, just go to
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwAx-rzEKv8

Depression, Etc. (#27): "Heavy" Thoughts Cymbalta Withdrawal

Welcome to the Firing Squad

To the executioners I am a deafening horror.
I have lost the chance to cut out the corpse
that lodges in my veins, so they give me “the works”:
seven .30 caliber rifles pointed at my face and the whole thing flies ice and coal.

Am I now, I guess I am “all buttoned up,” ticketed and shitless
on the caravan ride home.
Regardless of teeth chattering, I’ve had no disgorge or silence,
only some negation. I keep dreaming of it
because my brain remembers what happened between living
and departure, agony and, then, extinction.

Shot at close range, my body is still sentient and vile,
nothing more than gone, tongue-lashed,
wicked and feral, holding up soft jaws.

The Rocking of the Chest Hair Goes to . . .

Today's Winner: Mr. Tom jONes-s-s-s-s

Young People and Their Treadmills

When I was going through the deepest part of my depression, it was difficult for me to laugh about most anything. This made me laugh.

Jackass - The Treadmill - kewego
Three jackass having fun with a treadmill... I'd be happy to try the skateboarding part !

Keywords: bmx hurt bam margera ryan dunn brandon dicamillo funny cascade skateboard jackass humour treadmill

Video from bigmama

Tracy's Top Ten Imaginary Trampoline Tricks

The following is a picture of Dustin Hoffman with his pants down:


Sometimes, I like to contrast my poems about Pontius Pilate and Caligula with my list of stuff you can do on the trampoline. This is because I begin to think of tiny, tiny kittens. I haven't tried any of these tricks myself, so I CANNOT be held accountable for injuries. A bicycle helmet is advised.

Angry child: Lie flat. Kick as much as possible. Scream if you like.

Dustin Hoffman: Keep your body stiff. Roll side to side.

Amsler Grid: Scream while you lie on your side. Also known as “The Primal Scream.”

Mr. Macaroni: Jump side to side on your knees.

Father Confessor: While on your knees, stiffen your body. Fall on your face. Repeat.

Ronald McDonald: Stand on your feet and then jump in the shape of an “M.”

Model Train: Jump in a circle around the perimeter of the trampoline (don’t go to the very edge).

Model Train Wreck: Cover your eyes and then jump around aimlessly (especially good if you put objects on the trampoline).

The Requiem: Get at least two people on the trampoline (up to seven people). Try to knock each other off.

The Don Henley: Get everyone off the trampoline. Close your eyes and spin around as fast as possible.

Pontius Pilate Committed Suicide

Blood, like heartbreak, is not easy to wash off
when televised in three parts.
Witches will bring you gifts of
potato chips, cookies, and tin boxes
while you ask for redemption.
You will receive this, though,
only if you tell them it is honorable.

Voluptuousness is not the saddest way to die,
but loneliness could be the worst,
and the discipline it requires
is not what you expected.
Do not go out today.
A vampire has predicted your future.

You will die like a god with a knife
in your throat.

Eulogy of a Sometimes Fallen Angel

Somehow, in 2008, actor Brad Renfro's death from a drug overdose was pretty much overlooked. He starred in "Bully," one of my favorite movies, had this vulnerability that was amazing and touched my heart. At the beginning of his career he was quoted as saying "I'll always be Brad Renfro."


Do not return for baby spoons
or soda cans.
Know that you will need all of your clothes,
or none of them,
for where you are going.

You tricked me with open cupboard doors
and some scattered papers that had my name scribbled on them.
Your sad body was pulled from the garbage and into a morgue.
You had that coffin-like smile on your face.

If you pretend that you are sorry, I will know.
If you try to come back, I will find you.
Let me ask you a question.
Who were you in your former life?
Blighted and sweet, I am sure that you abandoned
that secret long ago.

Another Thing I Want

In one of my previous posts I mentioned some things I wanted but have not yet received. I would like an 18th century costume like this this one. Could someone buy me one?

Six of my Favorite Dreams

I went to a town where there was a church called The Church of the Very Funny Joke and another called The Church of the Staunch Feminist.

I was in a foreign country and ordered a salad. The waitress didn't know what a salad was. I explained to her that it had lettuce and other vegetables. The waitress said, "oh, that's called a 'Michael Caine.'"

I was invited to go to Church of Satan meetings, but I got out of it by saying that I couldn't meet on Wednesdays.

I was in a foreign country and felt lost, but I was taken in by a very nice talking bear who lived in a tree. He gave me a bed for the night, good conversation, and some money. You would be surprised at how many bears have houses inside of trees.

I was on a plane and saw Keith Richards speaking to a member of the flight staff. I stopped by and Keith or the staff member asked me what I was doing. I said, "I'm just waiting on (for?)
a friend." BOOM. Most of you probably recognize this lyric but, in case you don't, "I'm just waiting on a friend" is from the Rolling Stones song "Waiting on a Friend." I love that song.

I lived in a future world in which Earth was no longer inhabited. The land/island where I lived was floating in space. To get my mail I had to drift over to my mailbox. I dropped a letter and was heartbroken and nervous, but the letter bounced back up to me.

Depression, Etc. (#26): Medication Art

This is an image I created using some of the pills I take now or have taken over the past year to help with the following: mood stabilization/depression/anxiety/insomnia/IBS. I love seeing things for myself. I love documents of things, people, and places, following life for a year. So, this is one of my documents.

This Video Doesn't Need Any Explanation, But I Guess it Wouldn't Hurt.

You can get to a selection of "Play Him Off,Keyboard Cat" videos by going to http://playhimoffkeyboardcat.com/

Uh, OK, Jump Around Right Now!

You too will be mesmerized by the ultimate and wonderful hardcore cheesiness of House of Pain. House of Pain was an Irish-American hip-hop group. The part where the band member interrupts the parade might be hardcore, but I just don't know. Discuss:

Jump Around (Pete Rock Remix) @ Yahoo! Video

Other Treats That Tracy Likes

Milkshakes

KRISPY KREME GLAZED DOUGHNUTS :)

Jim Jones and Me

I think this post got lost somewhere along the way. So here goes again.



During military exercises no jackals have been harmed.
Amen.
"So," he says, "we should just do it in the road."

But if I perish like Icarus or Cleetus,
bury me facing the sun.
I have seen the execution squad and it has no end,
just the blood of enemies and death erections.

The battlements are drowned in vinegar,
the last meal of a righteous son.
The weakest are at the frontlines and
I have you by the balls.
So, I guess

I will shoot you right between the eyes.

Depression, Etc. (#25): Depression and Other Emotional Equivalents

1 second = 1 minute

1 minute = 1 hour
1 hour = 1 day
1 day = 1 week
1 week = 1 month
1 month = 1 year

Depression, Etc. (#24): What I Know

About a week ago I had a pretty tough bout with my depression. I think a large part of my depression relapse and GI problems have to do with my withdrawal from Cymbalta. It's like hell trying to come off of it completely. With the help of my psychiatrist, therapist, friends, and family, I'm determined to do this. I'm on Lamictal and a very small doseage of the generic Prozac. I've been taking Dicyclomine to help with the GI stuff. At night I take Lunesta or Ambien CR to help me sleep. I think my road to getting off of the sleep meds is a ways off, but it might happen too.

My psychiatrist has suggested silent meditation for me, since it will help me face my emotions. Silent meditation is one of the most difficult types for me. I've tried it before at a meditation center in Boulder, CO and thought I would jump out of my skin. The silence can be unbearable. Still, this meditation breaks through a wall of pain. Silence is, often, unwanted in the United States. Americans like the quick fix and I can be just as much of a sucker for that.

What I really wanted to talk about is that last week I was crying at the most random times. Matt and I went for a walk to exercise and also to get some green tea for me. My sadness kept taking over and I cried at least twice on our walk. Trying to formulate words that I wanted to say was kind of like lifting a 10,000 pound rock over my head.

During that week I took a shower and began crying. By now I was sitting down and it took all of my strength to pull myself up and out of the shower without crying or falling down. I kept hearing this voice from deep inside of me repeating you're going to get through this, you're going to get through this. I've gotten through times of horrible depression before, but where did this voice come from? I sense that it comes from a wise part of my soul. Depression can make me feel ugly, unloved, tortured by pain and shame. This voice in my head was almost to much to bear because it was so beautiful and clear. And beautiful and clear are not words I would use to describe the thoughts in my head. Usually, it says hey, ugly stupidhead. Because of head games it's hard for me to want to get better, since I tell myself that I will have to be "happy," put on my mask again. I know this isn't reality. Just as my wise voice comes from my soul, my negative thoughts are in my head.

GET ME SOME DESSERT!!!

I cannot eat any of these right now. Instead, I thought I would post pictures of desserts. Here goes . . .

Ummm . . . not so much.

CARAMEL SUNDAE

Dessert

Dessert

Peach Cobbler

Miniature scene from "Katamari Damacy" (video game). I'll take it.

Mmmmmmmmm. "Tetris" cake.

Miniature "Star Wars" cake. I want this one!!
Just kill me now.

Even Warren Buffett likes dessert.
This is a top secret photo of him refusing to let me have some of his dessert.

No, No, NO. I said NO. Dear God, NO!

How to do what on your desk? Is this guy wearing a one piece? It must be getting hot in that one piece because he's trying to pull it off.

Things That I Want

Here are list of 10 things I'd like to have. I've wanted some of these things since I was little. If I become a millionare I can get all of this stuff . . . Maybe. If not, I'll get my minions to fetch them for me.

Alas, these are only a few of the things I want.

1. electron microscope
2. tent for the living room
3. fog machine
4. huge disco ball that hangs from the ceiling
5. two kittens or cats with tiny, functional wings
6. dessert bar
7. planetarium projector for a small room
8. jumpy castle
9. miniature dinosaurs whose stomachs I can poke

AND

10. my own gateway to hell or I will accept a highway to hell

Oh, Poor Doggy

I wasn't going to post another thing today and I know videos can be a little much after a while, but this video won my heart. I have the same expression in the morning.

Things That Make Me Happy: Vintage Prince

Prince - Controversy
Uploaded by Master_System. - Music videos, artist interviews, concerts and more.

I think Prince is rocking the buttless pants in this one and the video and song are just hot, hot, hot.

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

I want to send out a thanks to anyone and everyone who looks at or reads my blog. I wish I could personally shake your hands. This blog has been a place of growth and solace for me through some difficult times, and all the comments I get and all the followers I have really mean a lot to me. Even if you swing by my blog every once and a while, thank you so much.

I Just Love This Photo

I don't know where this photo was taken or who the little girls are, but I just think this is so beautiful.

Intermission: Random Photos

Me 'n Sad Duck

Tracy, hard-core skater

Tracy, vintage '80s. You know you want the curly perm I have.

Tracy at a hair show with orange hair. I think this was the first time my hair was colored and I haven't stopped changing my hair color since then. The girl in the middle was wonderful. So sweet. And the hairdresser on the left was perfectly hilarious. I wish my hairdresser had been in this photo. She did an amazing job. The photo was taken around my first year in college.