Is this working? Good grief either I'm super tired or... no, there is no or. I'm super tired. I forgot how to upload pictures. I tried to upload pictures of Mommy Girl, including one of my all-time faves of the two of us rocking the new watches. I sort of see it as the cousin to the photo of Pops and I flashing gang signs along the Inca Trail. SO, as I was saying, I didn't post a blog for Mom's birthday. I wasn't planning on it, but it would have been a nice thing to do. Time is not on my side these days. So this is not a birthday post, but more like a "Mom mom's the greatest and if you disagree I will fight you" post.
The thing is, if you read this blog you know Mommy Girl, you know she's an angel and probably the funniest woman in the world. So... what else is there to say? She cooks like a champ, and she is Johnny-On-The-Spot with any kind of treat you could want, from cookies to milkshakes. She loves a good party, which is how our house became the party house for all the seminary kids. She is pretty thrifty, but on a good day she is the greatest shopping buddy, except for that she will tell you that everything looks SO GOOD on you!! She could beat me up, so it's comforting to know that she's such a kind soul. She is a champion nana, just ask the grandkids who cry and reach for her when I try and pick them up. She's recently taking up the ancient art of reading a book, which is exciting to say the least! She's always been smart, of course, because you don't raise four hellions like us by being a dummy. I can distinctly remember back in elementary school and middle school saying "Ohhh, hang on, Mom, I have a test today in school" and then she would bust out a mnemonic device for each and every vocab word I had to study. Right on, Mom! She single-handedly got me an A in every Honors Reading class I took. And every other K-12 class. THANKS, MOM! I LOVE YOU!

Pt. 2

Wow, I REALLY kept all 5 of you out of the loop with that last post. How inconsiderate. Are you doing OK? Have I destroyed the latter half of your week? Man, I'm sorry. Good news, though- Sunday's always better, and sho nuff here's the best part of my story! With all 45 minutes of sleep I gave my presentation on Nick Drake and it went well up until I started speaking Spanish. Nope, I am not kidding. Have you ever seen a movie where a robot goes haywire? It seems like it happens in every movie involving robots. Maybe the robot gets wet or something, but all of a sudden he's spouting off math equations and picking up signals from Al-Jezeera. Well congratulations to me, I did that. I caught myself and corrected it, but could only laugh and shake my head as I walked back to my chair when I finished. After class Dr. Kerry, ever the kind soul, pulled me aside and asked what was going on and why I was so happy. I think that by happy he meant drunk. You know, like, "Beth, what's new? Why so plastered??" I told him things were just going really well at the moment, work is great, I'm loving life. He, in turn, told me to go see my bishop. Just kidding, he told me that a student from California who's also going to Cambridge will be staying with me in two weeks. HOLLA! Her name is Zina and she's a grad student at UC-something and she's off the hook (his words, not mine. Nope that's a lie, definitely my words). I laughed through this entire conversation, mainly out of sheer exhaustion. It WAS a good day, though!

Then tonight- my last night with my missionaries. I'm pretty sure every time I have to say goodbye to another district I declare to all who will listen that I'm quitting. It is rough. I also unequivocally state each time a district leaves that THAT district was my BEST district, but this time I think I might be right. If not my very best, definitely in the top 5. I do have a top 5, for the record. It might be 6 now, I don't know. It's not an exact science. So they left tonight and it was not awesome but I love them. All 8 are going to Buenos Aires South and they are going to tear it up. They wrote me an early birthday card and they were so excited because they knew I would love it, and sure enough it was the exact card that I have bought MULTIPLE times for friends and family. They know me so well. I took a picture with my phone, which has become my camera since I don't have a working camera, so as soon as I figure out how to transfer pictures I'll do that. They are the greatest.

One more thing... according to my dictionary.com emails, portentous means pompous, but then what does pretentious mean? I refuse to believe that portentous and pretentious mean the same thing. My money's on a clerical error.

craaack

I am currently writing from Ali's bed on my cell phone. What a fascinating, modern world we live in.
I slept for a total of 45 minutes last night. Now it's midnight and I guess my big question is WHY AM I STILL AWAKE?
Today in my Cambridge class from 745 to 930 we talked about how to not get robbed abroad. Some chick in Mozambique study abroad got robbed 5 times in one summer. I think she went out late at night alone a lot. Plus it seems to me like homegirl prob forgot she was in Mozambique, too. This whole phone typing is off the hook and all but I haven't even gotten to the awesome part of my story. CLIFFHANGERRRRR...

Jim Lovell

Today Tom Hanks couldn't make it to the University Forum, so Captain Jim Lovell came instead, which is almost as cool.
Just kidding. I have been pumped all semester to go to the forum and good news- it was great! He is a very inspiring man. His central message was that there are three main kinds of people: people who make things happen, people who watch things happen, and people who sit back and ask, "What just happened??" He explained that he shouldn't be alive except that mission control (He strategically avoided ever referring to Houston, because I'm pretty sure the entire audience would have yelled, "...we have a problem!" Or maybe I would have been the only one.) was full of men who made things happen.
During the whole speech I felt like I was having Apollo 13 reenacted in front of me, only we got Real Jim instead of Fake Jim. It actually felt like Real Jim was just summarizing the movie for us, complete with floating around for a program that was never broadcast, sticking his thumb over the moon, and asking, "Gentlemen, what are your intentions?" I couldn't help but get the feeling that, since the mind plays tricks on you in your old age, Real Jim just pops in the Fake Jim DVD every once in a while to refresh his memory.
While I was sitting in the nosebleeds, trying to get comfortable and listening to Real Jim recreate Apollo 13, I couldn't help but feeling like Ron Howard gets the shaft. He probably sees Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg all buddy-buddy 24/7 and thinks, "What gives? Hanks and I do waaay more awesome stuff together, but no one ever hears about US together! It's always 'Steven this' and 'Steven that.' I mean, how long ago was Saving Private Ryan, anyway??" So, yeah, my heart really goes out to Ron. Plus I thought The Terminal was kind of dumb.

Meh...

I really don't have much to report, but I was so pumped to see the whole fam is posting these days that I didn't want to be the one to drop the ball and have the whole system come crashing down, because then I would just have guilt.

There is an intense twelve-pager due Wednesday. Normally a twelve-pager isn't too much of a problem. Shoot, when we got back from Hawaii back in oh-eight I did two ten-pagers two nights in a row! (Honestly, though, who schedules a paper due right after Thanksgiving break?) Anyways, this paper, though, is intense and I am sort of nervous. I spent eight hours in the library doing research for said paper. Yes, I am still working on the research portion of it, WHAT OF IT??? I know what I'm doing. My question is what did Spain do about the Holocaust? The main problem I see with my paper is that the question can be answered in one word: Meh. Yeah they let some Jewish refugees in to the country. Yeah they stopped some refugees from entering the country. They did the same with French and Eastern European refugees. Yeah Franco was pretty anti-Semitic, but he was also opportunistic (what head of state isn't?) so as soon as the outlook worsened for the Nazis Franco was all, "Oh heeeey, Roosevelt, what up, Broseph?" Typical. Actually the government documents I have are pretty dang funny. They mostly go like this:

Hitler letter: Franco, Sir, I am really looking forward to your full support. Man, between you, me, and the Duce we's gonna RULE this hizzy! GO PACT OF STEEL!!!

Franco letter: I know, right? Your Pact of Steel makes those wimpy Allies look like a bunch of Nancies. Fuhrer, you are the coolest.

Hitler letter: Generalissimo, thank you. Let me know how things are coming with your end of the bargain. A few supplies here, some troops there, and boy-howdy we are in business! Axis Powers on three! One- two- three- AXIS POWERS!

Franco letter: Yep. I'm tooootally with you. Seriously, your take-over plans are brilliant. Let me just... write this... down... "Hitler wants..." um, "total war," was it? Awesome.

Hitler letter: I don't believe you actually wrote anything down. The British are going down and the Nazis are off the hook. WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?

Franco letter: Freak, Hitler, it's not like we didn't just finish fighting a civil war over here. Calm the infierno down.

Meanwhile, Franco to Ambassador Hayes: Pshhh, can you believe that Hitler guy? He he he... what a dork. But, like, Spain and America, we're cool, right?

I'm thinking I might just sum up my research and present it in a one-woman play. I'll get a little mini-stache for when I play Hitler and a bigger 'stache for Franco. Plus, my Spanish accent is pretty accurate. To impersonate Hitler I'll just say "Doctah Jones" and "schnell!" a lot. Perfect. Done. A+.

The kind of cover song I like

My last post was about my obsession with all things Vampire Weekend. We listen to them non-stop now in the apartments (I am of course referring to Lanai's dungeon dwellers, the bottom floor denizens, an elite club of which I have been a card-carrying member for a year and a half now) and on the ipods BUT when we are in Ali's car there are two songs we listen to more than any other single thing save only the din of our own yelling. The first song is "The Rising" from the Joseph: A Nashville Tribute CD. When I first heard about that CD I mentally puked everywhere and verbally swore I would never listen to it, but then a burnt copy made itself my way in the mission and next thing I know I have the whole thing memorized. It's weird. But if you ever hear the song "The Rising," you will first be struck by how catchy it is, and then you will instantly have the desire to scream it at the top of your lungs. Again, weird. The second song we listen to is "Everywhere" by Fleetwood Mac. I have no idea where this one came from, but as a Rizley I have never said no to a little FM. So just to recap: "The Rising" and "Everywhere."
Now here's the unreal part. A day or two ago (I am so sleep deprived lately I cannot remember 15 minutes in the past) we were Wikipedia stalking Vampire Weekend and we found out that aside from their two CDs they have done a few cover songs and guess what one of them IS! I'll give you a hint, it's the one that ISN'T about the dispensation of the fullness of times. Give up? EVERYWHERE!!! What are the odds? I mean, what are the FREAKING odds? It's online and it's off the hook. It sounds like their own version of this already-cool song.

On an unrelated note I went to Tucano's for a coworker's birthday. It's weird to think that this particular group of work friends, including my friend that was hired with me, well, we are now the old-timers of the MTC. Old old old. Lunch was so much fun with the old-timers. I ate a ton, of course, and now my stomach is making these noises that if I had to describe I would say sound like Skritchie Head snoring. I love Tucano's.

Vampires

Nope, not Twilight vampires, sorry. We are talking less sparkles, more bad-A-ness. What's this, you ask? Tonight Ali, Shannon, and I went to the VAMPIRE WEEKEND CONCERT.
First of all, it is 2:30 and I am wide awake. We got home around 12:30 and played soccer and volleyball in their front room for about an hour and 1/2, completely destroying the place, but there was a lot of energy to expel. The only reason I finally came home to next door was because Branch President Reports are due for work in 5 1/2 hours. I am still so PUMPED, though! I wanted to jot down a brief rundown of the highlights, if for no other reason than, like Heidi said (and BTW I am so glad to see she's blogging again) this blog is like a journal. Yes, I have an actual paper journal, but last time I wrote in it I promised I'd write more the next day and then I didn't and now a few weeks have passed and things between us are just a little awkward...

So we got to the concert but then just sat in the car because when I walked out it was too cold outside. A few days of 40-50 degree weather have really spoiled us. When we got inside it was PACKED so we just chilled on the periphery until Ali got the bright idea to try the other side. I held down the fort whilst they scouted out a better spot. They called me to tell me to find them, so I had the happy fortune of pushing through a sea of hipsters, high schoolers, and high school hipsters to get from one side of the stage to the other. TOTALLY worth it, though. We were right up front. The opening act was actually really enjoyable even though I had only heard one of their songs. Then the Vamps came on stage and all hell broke loose, but in a good way. Screaming, jumping, dancing, pushing, singing, and that was just from the three of us. They put on a great show. At one point Ali got pushed/pulled into a mosh pit, only to reappear a few songs later covered in sweat. We were all covered in sweat, our own and otherwise. The band is not hard core, they are really nice guys, so a few times the singer kindly reminded everyone to watch out for one another. We did up until the encore, when we decided it was our last chance to get the bass player to see us.
Ohhhh the bass player.
Ahem, sorry, I got distracted. Where was I? Oh yes, we wanted to yell at the bass player so we pushed our way up to the front and center. I was the caboose and at one point after Ali and Shannon had successfully wrestled their way up, followed only to have two girls that looked about 18 block me out and wag their finger at me. Literally, they wagged their finger at me. Oh. No. That dog just ain't gon' hunt. So no worries, their Great Wall was just as easily breached as that other one. From front and center we were able to rock out with the greatest of ease, and we also got to scream in the bassist's general direction. It smelled like the worst kind of diseased rotting something. But WORTH IT. I am still so full of energy!
One more funny thing- we saw my home teacher up on the balcony and screamed at him until he saw us. He texted, "When can Carl and I come home teach you?" to which I replied, "Well now's not really good for me, maybe later? Like Sunday?" He responded, "Sounds good. These guys are really good live" to which I agreed, "Yes, life-changing." What did home/visiting teachers do before the days of cell phones and text messaging? I shudder to think of it.

Food Journal

For Food and History we have to write a two-week food journal. It's a pretty self-explanatory assignment. It's not due until about two and a HALF weeks but just to be on the safe side yesterday I figured I'd start. Depending on how you look at it yesterday was either a good time to start or just about the worst day I could have picked. Here's how it looked:

Breakfast: Fiber One bar and bottle of water (so far, so good, no??)
Lunch: apricot chicken and rice (Morgan made it. I don't eat that well without outside help), girl scout cookies, salt and vinegar chips, water with Crystal Light, and something else which I cannot recall but I figured mehhh that's enough.
Snack (I've decided to identify snack as it's own meal, because in my world it is): cereal, water with Crystal Light, and icecream
Dinner: a whole lot of pie (I originally put "a butt-load of pie" but that seemed inappropriate for an Honors class)
Then more salt and vinegar chips around 2 am

Oh and by the way, Happy Pi Day! There was a big ol' pie party upstairs. We were all crammed into the apartment like sardines in a can and at some part I got pie in my hair, but it was a lot of fun. When we finished, however, some of us needed to feel a bit less like Ben Stiller at the end of Dodgeball so we went on a walk. We stopped by some friends' house, they gave us boxes of chocolates, and we returned home pretty stoked about our recent acquisitions but sad about the counter-productivity of it all.

Today I started off with a healthy breakfast. I need to get my butt in gear! Hopefully by the time my food journal ends it will look more like a normal list and less like my fast-track to love handles.

Big news

I'm getting a new phone today. Peace out, LG P.O.S. I always hated you. No, seriously. It has been that bad for me. You never made me happy or did what I wanted to do. It's been all about you and your needs (like needing to be constantly charged, despite the fact that you give me no charger, or the need to turn off whenever the heck you feel like it, or even the need to send my texts into the cell phone abyss) but guess what, I have needs, too, and right now I need a cell phone that is not hot pink, cracked, and broken. It's not me, it's you. It is all you.

Untitled

I AM BUSY!

I don't like to complain (wait... no I guess I sort of do) but I feel super busy lately! What is THAT all about?

Today as I was walking to the Wilk to get picked up after class for Taco Tuesday, I saw a friend of mine from freshman year. He was facing me talking to some girl named Haylie (perhaps Haley, perhaps Hayley, maybe even Hailee I mean this IS Utah) and my fast-acting deductive reasoning skills told me that A) I was going to walk right past him, B) I was too close to him to act all nonchalant-like (FYI nonchalant is not a new word, it goes back to Mrs. Salley's Honors Reading class at Sonoran Sky Elementary so yeah... my vocab is already pretty sweet), C) he saw me look right at him and look away, and then of course D) every time I looked at him as I tried to mosey on past, he was staring right at me. There was no escape! I considered faking a phone call or remembering I forgot something (anything!!!) in class, or pulling a hammy and running away, but nope, I finally just decided to bite the bullet and go talk to him. Oh yeah, and I met Hayeliee. Now, let's not read too much into this (MOM, I'M LOOKING AT YOU. Sort of.) this was in no way me being bashful around a cute boy. This could just as easily been a girl from freshman year. Or a kid from one of my classes. Or a professor from one of my classes. Or one of my roommates. Shoot IT COULD HAVE BEEN ONE OF YOU! My point is, why oh why oh why do I get so awkward and hate it when I run into people?
Don't believe me?
Here's another example- I'm full of them.
Also today, I'm walking into the JFSB and I see a kid from my PoliSci 170 class from last winter. I don't remember his name, just that he talked A LOT. He says, "Hey, Liz! How are you?" First of all, people call me Liz all. the. time. They think, "Beth = Elizabeth = Liz = I'll call her by the abbreviated version of her fake name I just gave her!" Not so. Oh but yeah I also sat by a girl named Liz in that class so maybe that also might have had something do it with it. I'll let it fly. I do, in this case, let it fly but not out of the goodness of my heart. I say, "Yep! Good!" and run down the stairs, just barely seeing out of my peripheral vision this same kid turn around suddenly as if to say, "Wait, you're not Liz!" or perhaps, "Love that shirt!" or even, "Just won the lottery, wanna go halvesies?" I guess we'll never know. The point is I was out of the picture and out of his life. Forever. Goodbye, Kid Who Doesn't Remember My Name. Thanks for making me run down those stairs to avoid you.

I came across this picture and it made me laugh. I have no idea why I took it, but here is what my desk looks like at the beginning of the semester:



It doesn't quite look like that now. I tried counting the books stacked up now but since I'm really comfortable and didn't want to move I stopped at 28. Trusty Lamp is still there, further proof that Mom knows what she's talking about.

Actual conversation, as far as I can remember it:
Mom: Beth! I just found this lamp (editorial comment: in this case it was lamp, but that can easily be substituted with any other household item or article of clothing) and it's still in good shape! You want it?
Me: Mmmm... nope.
Mom: Aw, come on! It still works, just dust it off and plug it in!
Me: Nope.
Mom: It's great! I think it used to be in Steve's room! Or Andy's! (editorial comment: Probably both, via one of the grandparents.)
Me: Fine, let's have it.

Now here we are, some time later and I use Trusty Lamp everyday.

Deer Valley

Having Mom and Pops here over the weekend was heaven, just heaven. Yesterday was by far the highlight with our day in Deer Valley. I had forgotten how much I loved to ski, how much room for improvement there still is, and how hilarious Mom gets when she's truly in her element (i.e. physical activities). She is still ten times the skier I am. My falls yesterday were all of the "uh oh... can't balance in the powder... timbeeeerrrr!" and over I'd go like a big old tree. Mom, on the other hand, ate it twice and both times were at high speeds.

Picture this: We are on one of the last runs and for some of us it's time to wind down. Sometimes even when we don't want to wind down our quad muscles dictate these things for us. Not for Mommy Girl. As I turn a corner to catch up to Mom and Cass, I see Mom sliding down the mountain. On her back. Head First. Sans poles. She continues sliding. Then slides some more. I try to yell, "STOP!" but sometimes you just laugh so hard you can't speak, you know? Then it hits me, if someone slides that far, perhaps there is something wrong with that person which stops that person from, well, stopping. I try to ski over to her but sometimes you laugh so hard you can't ski, you know? I make it down, and when I catch up with her her face is dripping wet, almost like she has dunked it in water (or a mound of powder) and she is grinning like the Cheshire Cat. That is the last time I listen to her complain about being old and frail. Please, Woman.

Big Word

Remember how I am trying to improve my vocabulary? Well HERE is a word that I love:

Eructation

Isn't that beautiful? It means burp. Happy Thursday, Everyone!

P.S. Tonight I had my first "Congratulations, you're going to Cambridge. Here's what you need to know..." class. Have you seen Legally Blonde? You know the scene where she meets with her Harvard Law group and they all introduce themselves and explain a little bit about how brilliant they all are? That was how I felt. There I was, Reese Witherspoon, surrounded by these mad scientist geniuses, explaining how orange is SO not the new pink. The good news is, I am at the very least older than all of them, which means that if that primary song I love is right, and I do believe it is, I am wiser than them. Take THAT!
Basically the program will be ten times harder than I thought, but that much more incredible as well. I am going to drop one of my classes (the literature class, because, yeah it would be cool but let's be serious, I can read any time) and do a SUPERVISION!!! A supervision means I pick a topic and get assigned to a professor who can help me with it (oh, you know, just some Cambridge big wig...), and I write a paper a week and meet with him to go over it, all leading up to the big final paper at the end of the 8 weeks. Dr. Kerry, our guide through this whole thing, says it will kick our trash but in a good way. I had zero desire for this kind of abuse until he actually used the word "thrash," as in "your professor with give you a thrashing," and I thought, "Whoa... awesome." So now I'm pumped for the supervision! More time in the library, less time to travel, but if I write a paper on, say, SPAIN, I could potentially travel to Spain for my research. Is this real life? Do I actually get to do this stuff? If this is a mean trick I am NOT pleased, but if it is veracious (thank you, word of the day!) then I cannot believe what I get to do!

P.P.S.- How about the fact that my "P.S." is significantly longer than my initial post? It must be tired, because I am rambling. You know how that goes. GOOD NIGHT, FAMILY! I love you all dearly and miss you VERY MUCH!

Feliz Felices

Remember the scene from the last Harry Potter movie where he takes the Feliz Felices potion? That was how I felt today. If you forgot, or for WHATEVER reason (frankly I don't care what your excuse is, it's lame) didn't see it, here's the clip:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmNXq-XK2w0

Anyways, today was just like that. Here's the rundown (P.S. Funny story about the word "rundown"- I suppose my roommate Kaley and I were not that tight until one night she texted me, "Do you have the movie The Rundown?" to which I responded, "Your mom has The Rundown." I am not a strong proponent of Your Mom jokes but I'm glad I did in that moment because I guess it was then that Kaley decided I was OK and we've been friends ever since.)
Anyway, MY DAY.

I slept through my alarm, which is not a good sign, especially since it was set for 8:30 so you'd think I could handle that. But then I magically woke up at 10, which is late, but I haven't been getting a whole lot of sleep lately so I was just glad that I woke up at all. I didn't have my philosophy group meeting until 11, so 10 was perfect!
As I took my side alley short cut I noticed that someone had cleaned up the bags of garbage and rotten produce I normally have to side step.
In our philosophy discussion group we were talking about Utilitarianism and I was trying to think of a practical application. I talked about the mission and obedience, but then I realized HOT FUZZ is all about Utilitarianism. Bingo. Problem solved.
I am reading this book about the Holocaust called The Years of Extermination. It is not the cheeriest book but man alive it is well written. I am hooked. I spent a good 4 hours reading it today.
Lunch with friends- I ate a hot dog in the Tanner Building in honor of my reading and it tasted like kosher heaven.
I checked with my work schedule and, as much as it pains me to think that one day I will have to leave this magical place that is the MTC, I found out that my last district will leave 9 June so that gives me ONE MORE entire district to teach before I have to bid adieu to World's Greatest Job.
Last night while studying at 1 AM with Ali and Shannon I played my second favorite classical song, Holst's Jupiter. Tonight Ali sent me a copy of MoTab singing "The Iron Rod" to the tune of this song. Believe me when I tell you it is the most beautiful thing I have ever heard in my entire life and I have not stopped listening to it since. No, Dad, I didn't buy it, but it's not for sale or else I WOULD.
I got a text from a teacher in my district who just broke up with her fiancee and as bad as I felt for her I couldn't help but thinking, "Crap. What do I do when I see her? Hug her and have every missionary in the zone asking what's up? Surely not." Then for the first time in the history of my life I ran into her on campus! So I got to hug her and talk to her without making a scene. Then I invited her to get Red Mango yogurt with my friends and I after work. It solves everything.
Work today was UN.BE.LIEVE.A.BLE. I won't go into detail but we had zone conference and then a really incredible time in class afterward.
Red Mango. Done.
I came back and talked to my friends about going on a mission. They are at various levels of pumped-ness. I am pumped for them. I really really want them to go! Really! Wait, that reminds me of this:



Thanks, Stevie!
So basically today was off the hook. I don't want to go to sleep. I feel like I must have taken some of that Harry Potter potion and as soon as I go to sleep it will wear off and I will go back to being a normal student/employee/person. Today I am just feeling very grateful. As some rapper once said, "Today it was a good day."

Bee Tee Dub here's the song, I just found it on Youtube!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RbLO7_ZXolA