our flower girl's weekend..

Warning...lots of really poor quality photos...I left my good camera at home :(...but it was a great weekend. Brian, Jada and I headed to Waco for Kristen and Carlos' wedding! Brian was the officiant and Jada was one of the flower girls! And lots of our sweet friends were a part of the wedding. They are such a precious couple and we were truly honored to celebrate them! And Jada had a blast having some alone time with Mommy and Daddy too...we really enjoyed her. She LOVED the hotel...Jada would look for our room number and was in charge of the key every time. It was so sweet. So here goes a plethora of bad quality photos of a ton of sweet memories!

Jada and Sophie at rehearsal

All the girls playing ring around the rosies of course

Jada's picture that she loved...she took it while the rehearsal was going on :)

Jada and Kellie

Jada loving some Kellie/Bernie attention and love...The Big Day...My handsome hubby and the Handsome groom, Carlos!

All three flower girls and Jada's fake smile :)
Jada holding Kristen's flowers (she thought it was a big deal!)
Jada and Daddy
So sweet...Kristen seriously was BEAUTIFUL oh my goodness!!! I took her bridals and they are on my website if you want to see some more of this beautiful bride
Jada and Bern!!
The reception was so great...they had face painting and glow sticks for the kids!
While we were in Waco we visited the Cole's at the farm! David took us on a little farm tour which was so great. Here is Jada talking to baby Asha...Our walk on the farm

Turkeys...that will not be there in a month...
Jada loves animals and totally loved the Goats...
And this goat really loved Brian. He kept walking by and rubbing up against his leg...hilarious!
BunniesAnd possibly Jada's favorite part...picking Spaghetti squash...

she needed a little help
oh so proud!so last night for dinner after 45 minutes in the oven...

YUMMY!

Kiva Bear is ONE!

This is how our day started out...who couldn't be happy about the day with this face??? Now let me go back and tell you about the ways we were able to celebrate...and a few other fun things at the end...

We had a birthday party for Kiva on Sunday...it was super sweet and fun...Grammy, Grumpy, Aunt Dawn, and Madyson...Uncle Jason and Aunt Shannon and MiMi and PaPa were all there for the fun

MiMi made teddy bear cookies for our Kiva BearKiva and Uncle Jason

MiMi made a special cake for Kiva!
Aunt Ashley was there...which makes Kiva super happy!
And what's a one year old party without a picture of a belly hangin out with only one shoe on?
Kiva LOVES it when Brian tosses her in the air...squeels for sure!
I totally expected Kiva to dive into the cake...but the icing was a bit to sticky or intriguing!
One of Kiva's favorite gifts...a book about belly buttons...she LOVED it
a proud daddy...
after Kiva's party we had her dedication at church...these are the wonderful family and friends that joined us along with our church body as we prayed and blessed her. (Aunt Aubrey was there too...but she wasn't there yet for the pic!) It was a sweet time for sure. Aunt Ashley played Kiva's song that she wrote while I was pregnant with her and Thad spoke a blessing over her while the church body prayed that she would love Jesus with all of her life.Fast forward to Wednesday now...this was Kiva's last car ride facing the back!

Kiva's last ride was to family night for our small group...we met at the Fogle's house. Interesting and fun fact...my friend Anne and Kiva have the same birthday!!! And another friend of mine had her daughter, Izzy, exactly one week before Kiva...so of course we had to celebrate all of the girls' birthdays!

and of course Jada and Sophie enjoying a cupcake!...or maybe just the icing?
And this was first thing this morning!!!...We all took Daddy to work so we could all enjoy Kiva's first car ride facing the front...it was super fun!
Play by play...Daddy putting Kiva in the car for the first time facing the front...what's that...a dvd??

Oh my goodness this is the most exciting thing in the world!Kiva proceeded to kick and squeel the entire ride...literally...she could hardly contain herself! I wish I would have taken a picture of her when she saw MiMi and when MiMi gave her a new doll...another elated moment!

We were able to meet my dad for lunch...it was a good time to reconnect...and this picture is Kiva reaching for a nugget...seriously...she ate 8! The girl loves meat!

And the only appropriate way to end the day was celebrating my friend Anne at a murder mystery party...she and her husband looking hot in their 80's look! Love you, Anne :)

So now back up even further...last Saturday Aubrey, Ashley, my mom and I drove to Houston to celebrate AUNT SHANNON'S BIRTHDAY!!! It was a super fun birthday party...we were taught how to paint a picture starting from scratch...we were quite impressive indeed...but prepare yourselves for the picture that we painted :)

So here's my mom, Aunt Shan and Me before the painting fun began...

Mi Madre and Me

Aww...Ash and Aub!!!...Is this our first picture with the three of us?And our artwork!!!...on our drive down to Houston we were all talking in the car about which one of us will have the worst paintings...and hands down Ashley took that prize :) Check out the legs on her lady! I am laughing just typing this...looking at her painting never disappoints for a good laugh! I mean...isn't it a normal thing to paint bottoms?! Funny.

And the whole group...we love you Shannon and were honored to celebrate you...So at almost 1:00 am...I am done blogging and will start the day fresh tomorrow as we celebrate Kristen and Carlos as they get hitched! Can't wait!

On the eve of Kiv...

This time last year, I had no idea how my eyes would fill with tears listening to Kiva's sweet humms as she falls asleep, or how I would giggle over and over every single day as Kiva's laugh shakes her whole body (especially her pop belly!), or how she affectionately answers to Kiva Bear with a shoulder shrug and a grin, or how much sweeter the spirit in our house is with her playful personality, or even how the beautiful sight of Kiva jumping at the sound of the door opening when Daddy comes home...Not to mention how precious the sight of Jada helping Kiva by bringing her baby to her, or feeding Kiva, or reaching something that is out of reach so that Kiva is happy. I had no idea how my life would be better, our marriage better, our home better, our hearts better, our family better...Kiva just makes everything better. I had hoped for many things when I hoped for Kiva...but there are just some things I would not have known to hope for...Kiva has far exceeded all of my expectations of another daughter. This time last year was the eve of Kiv~ and all the beauty that she brings... I cannot wait to celebrate her tomorrow!~

A very broad update!...

There are lots and lots of things that have been going on in our world over here! So...I am planning to give you a broad overview of the fun we've been having. A couple of fun facts:

• Kiva turns ONE this Thursday!!! We celebrated with a party in the park this past weekend and we were able to dedicate her to the Lord with our church...I can't believe how time has absolutely flown by...I will post those pics on her big day...
• The girls and I took some pics in the pumpkin patch by our friend Kristen...it was a fun time
• We have new neighbors! I have been meaning to blog about this for a while...our neighbors are JARED AND RISA!!! We are just so excited! They just moved in about a month ago and we are thrilled to get into the groove with them with intentional community life...we are already close with them so now we just get to live in this new way!!
• As you know, Kiva loves her baby...and here she is putting her baby to bed...my grandad made this crib...so fun!
• Jada has never really been into babies like Kiva...she has always loved animals more! For example...while Kiva was playing with her baby Jada decided the piggy bank was her baby for the day!
• Jada is seriously a good artist for just turning four...she has been drawing really great hearts...here is one :)
• I got Kiva this onesie for my sister-in-law, Shannon's, birthday...too fun. I also think it is for Aunt Dawn too :) I just love her joy in this photo!
• I had the chance to speak at a couple of different ladies things lately. This past Thursday I had the chance to speak at an event called "Roots." It was a really sweet time with ladies from high school age to grandma age. It was a truly beautiful representation of generations among women. I got to talk about mentoring and discipleship...but I didn't talk about that. Really what I talked about was Mothers and Daughters. It is a subject that is so dear to my heart for so many reasons. I could share all sorts of fun stuff about it, but I will share an experience that I had before I spoke...I had been preparing and feeling the weight of carrying the women that I would be speaking to around with me...you know that feeling of really wanting to share God's heart with them. So, I had a chance to go out to Mia's grave while I was alone preparing for the night. It was a sweet reminder of releasing "daughters" (aka: girls) to Jesus. My mom brought some balloons over earlier in the week and I was able to release them as a representation of releasing the women to the Lord. I loved watching the balloons float away as I cried in hope of what God wanted to do that evening. The day before I took some pics of Jada with the balloons...I am glad I did. Here are some fun ones!
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• I will post more on Kiva's birthday...Lord willing :)
  

Kiva's Baby

Yesterday Kiva, Jada and I were out running errands. While we were in the toy section Kiva pointed to a baby on the shelf. I thought it would be harmless to let her hold it in the basket since she "holds" things in the basket for me all the time. Well...she definitely owned that baby the moment her hands were on it! So...of course, I buy it.
I have NEVER seen anything like this...Kiva LOVES her baby. Seriously. She holds her and hugs her and pats her back and puts her on a blankie. She even tries to share her food with her as seen in these pics. It is so sweet. The baby goes with Kiva as she crawls and eats and sleeps. If she is not near Kiva for a moment and I ask her "Where's your baby?" She will make a squeeling noise, look for her, and crawl to get her as fast as she can. This is one of those toys that is just Kiva's...Jada doesn't get to share it. Jada is fine with that...but Kiva will make sure and let Jada know if by chance Jada picks her baby up. SO funny! I love this new baby thing. Brian and I both think this might be the sweetest thing yet!

thinking on...

I have been thinking a lot about all sorts of things. It has been good and challenging and tiring and good some more :) I think the Lord is asking me to Simplify. I am glad about that. But, this so happens to be a season where I feel really busy. More than normal. I have been asked to speak at different things lately. One of those is next Thursday night (say a little prayer for me :)) and I am speaking about community among women. I have been feeling awkward and a little insecure in regards to some of these "ministry" things. I like being at home with the girls and our community of friends. But, I am thankful for these opportunities with other women for sure. Anyway...I was reading a book in preparation and stumbled on this quote. I thought I would share it with you. It was encouraging to me and thought it might be to you too...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine like children do. We were born to make manifest the GLORY OF GOD that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." from a Lisa Bevere book.

So...let God's work in us shine today to make Him famous in the world we are in...sound good?

Is that....? How long have you had that? What does it say?

It's been a long time comin'...this blog, I mean. I was debating at the beginning if I should write a blog about it, but now I think the time has come...so here goes!

This past weekend we remembered our sweet Mia. 2 years ago is when she went to be with Jesus and we have missed her every day since. It was a good time that our family spent at her grave. We released 4 pink balloons (for each one of us), Brian read his letter from her funeral and our sweet friends brought flowers, painted a beautiful fountain canvas, made a handkerchief, and did some super precious scripture stuff to honor her and remember her. My mom and Mike brought a sweet wind chime as well. It was a good time of that strange tension of loving every minute that I have with my family here and wishing Jesus would come back right then because death still effects us. So...in light of this weekend, I thought it was an appropriate time to share about this news... I have a tattoo on each wrist! One of them is white and the other is light blue and black. Here are their stories:

I got the white one first.

...you can hardly see it, but it reads "hope." It is written on my wrist in the place where I could see it when I hold babies. Brian and I went and got this on my wrist about a month after we lost Mia. I wanted it to look like a scar of hope. It does. And I am so grateful that during that time of great loss, I was able to hope because of Christ...He really defeated death once and for all and gave me a reason to HOPE. And throughout my pregnancy with Kiva I enjoyed this tattoo a lot and I just plain like it :) And something else that is super special to me... My mom and my sister in law got a white tattoo shortly after. I love that we have that in common! It means even more that way.

Now for the darker tattoo:

It says "talitha" with a little blue bird.

The word Talitha is taken from Mark 5:41 "Taking the child by the hand, He said to her, "Talitha kum!" (which translated means, "Little girl, I say to you, get up!"). Immediately the girl got up..." Other translations say Daughter in the place of little girl. You get the word's definition right? The origin is believed to be Aramaic. Jesus said it.

And the blue bird...to me it is a symbol of life and freedom. Many places a blue bird symbolizes satisfaction, joy and fullness of life.

Now that you have the facts, here is the story behind the Talitha and Bluebird tat :) It is a rather deep and emotional story...just a warning. Shortly after we lost Mia I was sitting at the cemetery weeping over having lost my daughter. I was listening to the Jason Upton song that says "Come up here, come up now...my beloved, my beloved." I was listening to it in a fresh way as though Jesus said those words to precious Mia in my womb...I knew He loved her dearly and had called for her to come be with Him. It was one of those super emotional weepy moments. It was good. Anyway, I said to the Lord outloud "Why did you have to take my daughter? There are lots of daughters, why mine?"... and it was as if the Lord answered me right back "this is what you are created for...to bring daughters to me." Immediately, I knew that the meaning behind this was to spiritually bring him women, young women, and old women and little girls...HIS daughters...daughters that He wants to live with Him forever...to lead them, to guide them, to show them who Jesus is. I knew this was real and I began weeping more and through my tears I said "OK...I will." It was a terrible/beautiful moment mixed with grief, vision and purpose.

So...do you get the word TALITHA in that? Little girl or daughter. It is part of me now. Evidently this is true with Jada and Kiva and any other daughters we may have. But also I have had this in the forefront of my mind every time I am asked to speak anywhere...to college students, moms, women, small group, each girl/woman that walks into my home...etc. I want to be an arrow to Jesus. ALSO...it has given me much rest AS HIS DAUGHTER...safely resting in His love for me and His really good sovereign plan for all of my days.

The bluebird...when I was pregnant with Mia (her full name Mia Carolyn...meant "who is like the Lord...the FREE one." I would often say "I think she is going to teach me to be free." That is why the bluebird is there...and this weekend I realized once again that Mia has taught me to be free in so many ways already. Praise Jesus.

And another sweet thing is that the actual tattoo is in Lucretia's handwriting (an older woman/friend who has shown me what it looks like to be a daughter of the Lord in beautiful ways.) And Ashley B. found the pic of the bluebird for me (a beautiful example of a younger woman who has faithfully looked to Jesus as a trusting daughter.)

So...now if you see me you don't have to wonder what that is, what it says or think "oh my goodness is that a tattoo under her watch???" Yes, it is...and now you know why it means a lot to me :) Feel free to talk about it or ask about it anytime!

Onto some other news...the mouse came back...SICK. It was just so frustrating to me. So, last night after our small group meeting Brian, Will and Eli set up 10...count-em TEN mouse traps to catch this pest.

Some serious amo huh?

This is the team of mean, strong, mice fighting fellas...don't they look tough...if I were a mouse, I would be afraid!

I mean...if you've ever wondered what super-hero muscles look like...now you know!
Moral of the story...there was a snap that was heard in our home around 1 am...see ya mousie! YAY for Brian, Eli and Will!