Coolness!!!

Well, I actually got a little accomplished today. Mostly just laundry, but, it is a start!!! I even put some away!!!! There is underwear in my drawer and towels in the closet. It seems kind of pointless because you have to turn around and do it again in a week, but, it looks better, I guess. Personally, a big pile of clothes on the laundry room table suits me just fine!!!!

Norm and I went to Wally World today and got some milk and junk so we don't have to go anywhere this weekend. The stores are wild on Memorial Day, if they are even open, so, we are set. I also got some flowers for my yard. Boy howdy, those things are expensive, but, they are pretty. Maybe I'll plant on Monday.

We had been home for a while and our neighbor came over to tell us that he hooked up our sprinkler line. It was the same place that it had been broken before, so I figured "here we go again", but, IT WORKED!!!!!!! They played around with the regulator for the water pressure and it took care of the problem!!! We have to go get some parts on Tuesday, for a regulator that is a little larger, so we can get better coverage with the sprinklers, but at least it is working and I can save my lawn. What a relief!!!! That lawn is such a lot of work and the sprinkler system was really hard to put in, so, I just didn't want to see that lawn go brown. Maybe now it won't.

I really can't think of all that I've done today!!!! I know that I have been busy all day, but I guess it was just my imagination, cause I can't remember what I did, other than some laundry and dishes. Guess it is better than nothing. It feels good to get something accomplished. If I can just keep going now.

Norm was off his oxygen more today than yesterday. He even walked out to the side yard with our two neighbors to look at the valve and stuff out there, for the water. He got a little tired, so I brought him a chair, but I think it was good for him to be with the "guys". They came back in the yard and worked a little bit and I could tell Norm was in trouble....just all of a sudden got really tired. But, he made it over to the deck and sat down a minute and was just fine. I think it is going to take him a while, but he really is going to get rid of the oxygen. He will be so happy.

We are going to try to go to church tomorrow. It felt so good to go last week. We saw people that we hadn't seen in months.

I hope that is it just a little warmer for the holiday. For the last couple of days, there has been a breeze that keeps it just cool enough that you don't want to spend a lot of time outside if you are not in the sun. Tomorrow we are just going to "veg" after church, but Monday, I am hoping that it will be warm enough to plant those flowers.

For now, I am going to go to bed. Maybe I will start a good book.

"Be glad of life, because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

Well, What Do Ya Know????

Well, I don't know if I hit the wall or the wall hit me yesterday, but Norm and I are both still here and the dog is hiding, so, I guess things aren't quite so bad!!!! A good "vent" does the soul good!!!

Therapy went well today. We had thought it was going to be our last week with physical and occupational but the physical therapist said that we may as well finish out the month with the schedule that we have, and then they will cut Norm loose. The cardiologist wants Norm's heart to rest for a week before we go to cardiac rehab, where they will really start pushing him. The heart surgeon said that was a good idea, but "let's not make it too long!!!". Dr. Mitchell has always been really concerned about the deterioration in the muscles from laying in bed so long. I must say that the inactivity has sure taken it's toll, but like I've said before, it is coming back. Slowly maybe, but it is coming back. Norm was just saying tonight that he could tell a difference in his hands and arms.

He has shed the oxygen a lot again today. We have discovered that he holds his breath a lot when he is stressed or tired. That makes a huge difference, so there again "breath deep through your nose and out your mouth slowly". I'm gonna make a recording!!!! Norm doesn't think it is going to be long before he won't be on it much at all during the day. It sure is annoying to hear that noise all of the time and for him to have that thing stuck up his nose and drag that hose around.

I often think of how things were when he first came home and how they are now. We were both so nervous about everything, and were really stressed out. We were on our own...kinda like bringing your first baby home. You are responsible for the meds, baths, clothing, food, and so on. But, Norm is getting so much stronger that he can do a ton of it himself. It is a little hard to watch him struggle, but I have to let him do what he can. I had to be in the same room with him every second, when he came home. I had to help him move from one room to the other, and help him up the stairs to the potie. Getting him dressed was a major undertaking, but now, he can dress himself. The shoes are rather "iffy" but, someday!!! I can even go to Wal Mart for a bit now, and leave him home. But, I am thinking about looking around for some kind of cheap cell phone, and a plan that we can afford, so he can have a cell phone with him all of the time, instead of trying to answer the regular phone. They have so many different options now, that I am sure I can find something to fit what we need. I think they have one now, that you don't pay, if you don't use it. I'll just have to look.

I have to say that, after all my moaning and complaining yesterday....when Norm and I were in the kitchen today, we heard this funny noise. Our neighbors watch out for us pretty well, so, I just thought one of them was at the door. I went to the door and there was our neighbor across the street, climbing up on our roof to fix our shingles. We had not said a word to anyone, but it was not hard to see!!! Anyway, we were just going to have the roof re-done, but he just showed up and fixed it. How nice was that???? So, I guess I got humbled one more time!!!

Tomorrow Norm is planning to go out with this same great neighbor and friend, to get parts to try to fix our sprinkler system, one more time!!!! I have often thought about putting a FOR SALE sign on our lawn so our neighbors will talk to us again. The poor man who fixed the sprinklers four other times, won't even poke his head out the door!!!! I don't blame him. He worked so hard trying to get them going. Maybe someone with different ideas, will figure it out. I am a little worried tho, cause the man who worked on it before, is really smart and invents things all of the time!!! If he can't fix it, I'm worried. What wonderful friends we have. There is so much to be done that I don't want my neighbors and friends to run away when they see me coming!!!!! I think that the hardest part of this whole thing, is to watch our neighbors do our work. Our yard, our water cooler, our laundry, and the "whole nine yards". Very difficult to watch.

My bother called me tonight, and boy, if I thought I had it hard, I was mistaken. He is sick and has been for several weeks, is newly married to a great gal, and has to take care of my crabby, ornery 95 year old father. We love my dad to pieces and my brother would do anything for him, but my father is mad at the world right now, and not fun to be around. My brothers wife is very patient with my father and very understanding when it comes to the amount of time my brother has to spend with him. It is good that he has her to support him, because he has a huge load to carry. My father has quite a sizeable piece of property, with some rental housing and business rentals on it, and my brother is also taking care of all of that. So, I will take my situation anytime. I hate being so far away and not able to help. Anyway, it was great to hear what was left of my brothers voice, and to hear that he is happy and semi-well.

As far as everything else goes, I have decided to eat the elephant one bite at a time instead of trying to shove the whole thing in my mouth at once...or however that saying goes!!!

One must be fond of people and trust them if one is not to make a mess of life.
~E.M. Forster

What the Heck????

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.
~Jack Handey

I can't figure out what kind of day this has been...good, so-so, sorta bad, kinda yukky or downright poopy!!!! It seems like today has hit all of that!!!! Let me list a couple of reasons: a very sweet friend of mine died yesterday and I found out about it today...I found out that Norms doctor did not order some really critical meds that he has to take and he cannot get off of them without a doctors help.., we decided to go down to my daughters house to visit her and her family (that was the good part) and were driving out of the driveway and saw that the wind that we have had the last couple of days, has really done a number on our roof so that may have to be replaced....I went by the doctors office to see what happened with the meds and they said they ordered them but we just didn't get them...I went to the bank after the doctors office, to get some money because we were going to take my daughter, her husband and Katie out to lunch and the ATM messed up so I had to go inside to make sure it didn't make two withdrawals and I only got one!!!....We got on the freeway and Norm told me the wrong on-ramp to use, so I had to turn around and get back to the right one!!!...Got down to Spanish Fork and I made the wrong turn, so we were lost again.....we finally made it there and went to get our lunch and the lady that waited on us didn't give Christy her onion rings: she got fries instead....we went home and sat for a few minutes then went to Wal Mart to pickout flowers for Norms parents graves..Norm decided that he wanted to bring the oxygen tank in with him, so we got him a "putt-putt" chair, got him all set up with his oxygen and went about our way....only to discover that he really did not feel good and was having trouble getting enough air....when we got out to the car to go home, we discovered that no one had turned the tank on!!!!! All of that time, and it was never turned on!!!!....we ate dinner and were getting ready to start bedtime stuff. Norm tested his blood, and found that it was way to high, and I have no clue what to do!!!! I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS ANYMORE!!!!!! Meds, doctors appointments, therapies, diabetes clinics, pills here, cream there, showers, ted hose, ...blah, blah, blah!!!!! YOU CAN HAVE IT!!!!!!!

At least the "big sprinkler in the sky" was working today and my lawn, onions, and rasberries won't die for a few more days!!!! Oh yea, and my dishwasher door is broken!!!!!!!

I honestly don't know what hit me today but it was something big, and ugly!!!!!

On the good side, Norm has been spending a lot of time off the oxygen. At least when he is in the house and not moving around too much. (and, when we forget to turn it on!!!!) Even the forgetting to turn it on part was sorta good cause he realized that he can do without it and that he will recover if he just works through it. For a long time now, we have realized that he never really has learned to breath right. So, we are always telling him "breath deep, in through your nose and out your mouth." Over and over and over!!!! You would be amazed at how much that helps him recover from struggleing for enough air. He realizes now too, after the "forgetting part" that he is dependent on it to a certain point and that he needs to learn to do without it when he can. It is kind of a security blanket, but I can understand after so many weeks of really bad lung and breathing issues, that he would like to have that security. But, he has his work ahead of him to learn to let it go and get out of his comfort zone a bit. Like I need to do with food. Is there Eaters Anonymos anywhere????


Life's not always fair. Sometimes you can get a splinter even sliding down a rainbow. ~Cherralea Morgen

"Slug Day"

I have been so bad today!!!! All of Norms appointments got cancelled and it was raining and cold out, soooooooooo, we just stayed in and did nothing. For me it was a good thing, and I never even got dressed!!! But, for Norm, it wasn't such a wise thing cause part of his problem is that he needs to keep busy. He had nothing to do today, so he got a little bit "sideways" a couple of times. So, I need to rethink things when I need a "slug day". It sure was nice, on my part anyway. Haven't had one of those in a long time. So, now I have had one and it is back to work with therapies, garden, house, sewing, flowers, weeding, mowing, and more.

Norm is getting stronger everyday, so, now I need to think of things for him to do. He helped with the bills today, but quickly got frustrated. It seems whenever there is pressure of any kind, he can't quite handle it. That is getting better too tho. He is showing more interest in going out and doing stuff outside, or running errands. A couple of times we have gone to a store that has had those little "putt-putt" chairs, and that works out good. He can do more and more all of the time. Another thing that is helping is that he is recognizing that he needs something to do. He knows that he just can't sit and think about things too much, so, that is a step in the right direction. Funny tho, he won't let me teach him how to knit, or crochet, or make hats, or tat, or sew, or scrapbook, or make cards or tole paint, or any of the good stuff!!!!! It will all be good when the weather gets warmer and we can spend some time outside.

We are going shopping for tomato plants tomorrow, and I think I am going to buy some flowers to plant. I have three big beds, and they look so pretty with bright colors and lots of different types of flowers. In the past, my daughter and I have just gone through the nursery or wherever we have decided to buy plants and just picked out what we thought was a pretty color or blossom. It has worked out really well and I have gotten many compliments on them. There is no plan, just throw stuff in the ground and feed it with Miracle Grow!!!

Today Norm has spent quite a bit of time off the oxygen, and that is a good thing. He even walked out to the mailbox by himself, with no walker and no "go juice" (oxygen). So, slowly, he is getting rid of that tube he has to have trail behind him everywhere he goes. We have this machine in the house that is called an oxygen concentrator. Norm is hooked to that, by a 50 foot tube and is able to move anywhere in the house, out on the front porch or on the deck. I imagine he will have it at night for a while, but he sure is getting sick of it during the day. It will be nice not to have to load those tanks in the car too. We have tanks for when we go out away from the house.

Sometimes people can become dependent on oxygen and I am thinking that maybe there is a bit of that going on, but then again, he has had some severe lung issues over the past thirteen weeks so, it would stand to reason that he would need it. He just has to start learning to do without and push himself. Although, I can understand his reluctance to do that too, because he came so close to dying at least four times. It would not be hard to imagine being scared. He will work through it. He has come so far, and he is beginning to see his progress.

Every day, I am seeing more of the benefits from this whole ordeal too. (If there is any!!!) Yes, he has the opportunity to have much better health, more energy and get off some dangerous meds he is required to take for thinning his blood. But, in addition to that, I see our relationship changing. Not necessarily worse, or better, just different, and that's kind of nice. We talk a lot more and we seem to be able to express ourselves to each other, more freely. Of course, I would never want something like this to happen to him just so I could "talk", but these are just some of the perks I guess, that one can get, from being through life altering things. And, this definetly was that!!!!

Norm and I have had kind of a hard time learning to live on our own again, with no kids. We miss them terribly but know that they must have their own lives. It's almost like we are dating, and getting to know each other all over again. When there are kids in your life, you tend to get lost in them, and not each other. Then, when the kids are gone and on their own, it's back to the drawing board and you have to learn to live with each other again. It's not really a bad thing, just not so easy sometimes. Norm and I have discovered that we are a team. We have to learn to be. Our children are teams with their spouses and we are the same, just have been doing it longer. Learning, it's all about learning.

You have learned something. That always feels at first as if you had lost something. ~H.G. Wells

Hot Tuna!!!!

We are doin' gooooooooooooooooooood!!!! Norm went in for his cardioversion today. We had to be there by 9:30 and we were out of there eating breakfast by 11:30. I-Hop, no less. The doctor told Norm that he could have nothing to eat or drink after midnight last night, so, by 11:30 he was a bit hungry. So we did the I-Hop thing. That was our first time venturing out to eat anywhere that didn't have a drive-thru. Norm hasn't been able to walk very far, plus, you have to drag oxygen with you. We are getting pretty good at it tho!!!!

Anyway, I did not stay in the room while they did it. Dr. Walkers P.A. came out and got me, in it seemed like about 10 minutes!!! I walked into the room and Norm was laying there like he had just had a nap. Well, he had, but it was very short. He said "I thought they were going to shock my heart". I told him that they already had and he was amazed. He said "I didn't even know I was asleep". I looked up at the monitor and there was that beautiul regular heartbeat. It was wonderful to see. We pray now, that he stays in a regular heart beat, instead of going back into a-fib. This is the last cardioversion they will do on him, so, if this doesn' t work and the maze procedure doesn't kick in, I guess he will stay on cumadin the rest of his life.

It was funny when we walked into the Cardiac ICU ...Dr. Mitchell (the heart surgeon) was there. He saw us and gave us a big wave, but when he came into the room, after talking on the phone, he had this worried look on his face, and said "What are you in here for????". I told him that it was a cardioversion, and he was much relieved. "Oh, yea, it is Tuesday!! Dr. Walker and I talked about that!!!" He looked Norm over and was pleased with his progress, said that he was skinny and then left, saying that he had a short surgery and would be back after. I went down to the OR to see Jake and Dr. Mitchell was just finishing up an operation and asked how Norm was. I told him that we still had a regular heartbeat and he said "Yeeeeeesssssssssssss!!!" He is so cool. What a neat man he is and an extremely talented surgeon.

So, we are home now, tired, but well and hoping and praying that when we go to the doctors appointment tomorrow...that he is still in a regular heartbeat. I think everyone will cry if he is not. We need a break here folks!!!!! Let's get 'er done!!!!!

I got a call from some of my "ICU Family". It was great to hear Anna's voice and for her to say that Rick and Tara were well and happy. Didn't hear much from Robert....just mumbleing in the background!!! But, I like him anyway!!!! Sure do miss those guys, but, they are where they need to be and where they want to be....."HOME". Just wish we lived closer.

It was like "old home week" when we walked back into CICU too!!!! Everyone waved and smiled and then asked "what are you doing here???" We had been in CICU three times, so, they know us well. They are all great there and it was good to see them...partly because we knew we weren't going to be there long!!! It was good for them to see Norm walking, dressed in real clothes and smiling. And he left the same way!!!! They loved it.


My daughter called tonight saying that one of her husbands friends gave them a really good deal on some sod for their back yard. Now I am totally ripped!!!! My lawn is dying and really yukky because the sprinklers keep breaking.....and my daughter gets sod!!!!! What is wrong with this picture!!!! I am happy for them, but jealous!!!! My lawn looked so pretty last year and we had so many pretty flowers.....I really don't like her!!!!! She's got flowers already too. Brat!!!!

So, now I am going to go eat some worms!!!!!

If you don't get everything you want, think of the things you don't get that you don't want. ~Oscar Wilde

Well, we got the word!!!!

I guess it's a go for the cardioversion. His bloodwork looks good and everything checks out, so, tomorrow morning at 8:30, we have to be to admitting in the hospital. Then, at 9:30, they will do it. I must say that I was hoping that something wouldn't check out and they couldn't do it!!!! I have total confidence in his cardiologist. He is awesome, and he explained everything to us. It really is not too big a deal, but so much has happened to Norm that I hate to take a chance on anything more going wrong. He really will be in the best of hands and if anything does happen to go wrong, he will be in the right place. It still makes me nervous. But, it has to be done, so, I just need to buck up!!!!

We went to occupational therapy and physical therapy today and they said that they didn't think it was necessary for him to come back after the end of this week. There is really nothing more they can do, and what needs to be done, we can do at home. I guess Cardiac Rehab is next, but the cardiologist wants to give Norms body a chance to rest for a week or so, before we do that. We can just walk and do some low-key upper body stuff till then. So, that was good news. He walked quite a ways today, so, they just decided that a couple of more days and he will be ready. So, onwards and upwards.

Now, if only my sprinklers and water cooler would go "onwards and upwards". My wonderful neighbors have been working so hard on them, but things just keep going wrong. They are so awesome and have worked so hard. I don't have the heart to tell my good neighbor who has been working on the sprinklers, that they blew up again this morning. He was so happy last night when he thought they were fixed. He is not going to be happy. I think I won't tell him. If he asks I will tell him, but I won't bring it up. It is so hard to let people do stuff like this and just sit and watch. I think that man has fixed that stupid thing five times. Or, at least thought he did.

The guys working on the water cooler have been here for three days, working on it. It has leaked all over my carpet twice now, and they seem to be finding leak after leak. The latest one is in the attic. Oh goodie!!!!! I don't know whether to cry or laugh.

If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment.

~Henry David Thoreau

Monday, catch up day!!!!

It's time to update!!! Saturday and Sunday were big days.

Saturday: Norms brother was married in the temple today and it was wonderful. They have been working so hard for this and came all the way down her from Layton, so Norm could go....and he did!!!! He didn't quite make it through it without a wheelchair, but at least he was there. It meant a lot to his brother for him to be there.

His brother has been diagnosed with cancer, so we don't know what the future brings. He has been undergoing treatments since December of 07 and there have been some improvements so we are holding our breath. This marriage has been wonderful for he and his wife, and we would love to see it continue for many years. We all love her to pieces. She is so good for him. It has been a great ending to a long and hard story for both of them. What a blessing it was to take part.

Norm was pretty tired when we got home, but he seems to be recovering pretty fast from something like that, which is a good sign. When he gets tired, he has a little bit more of a hard time breathing, but seems to recover from that as well, pretty fast.

After the temple, we had a BBQ at Norms sisters house and it was great to see all four siblings together. That is one of my favorite things to watch because it hasn't always been that way. There just seemed to be a need for a party, so, we had one!!!! After that, Norm was really tired, but it was a good tired.

Sunday: We went to church!!!! It was just part of it...Sacrament, but it felt so good to be a part of our ward again and see all of our friends. It was great to sing the hymns. Norm had his surgery on Feb. 26 and it has been 13 weeks since we have been able to be there. The had Sacrament in the hospital chapel and we were able to go a couple of times. Also, you would have the opportunity to have it in your hospital room, but there is nothing like your own ward.!!!! The Bishop asked Norm to stand up and let everyone know that he was there and doing well.

The rest of the day, we just kind of "vegged" out. It was nice to have some time to just do nothing. I felt guilty because there is so much to do here in the house, but, I needed the time. So did Norm.

The weather has been rather hot lately and our lawn has suffered, so, our neighbor came over and worked on our sprinklers. He wanted them ready to water today, so he did that on his "day of rest". He is a great neighbor. All of our neighbors have been the best. They have cleaned our yard, planted part of our garden, aireated our lawn, fertilized our lawn, done my dishes, folded my laundry, taken care of my dog for nine weeks, vacuumed my floor, watered my plants, fixed our swamp cooler, fixed our dryer, watered my garden, and on, and on and on. I have said before, that I don't know how to repay them.

Well, we are off to physical therapy, occupational therapy, and then an appointment with the cardiologist to discuss a cardioversion tomorrow. We are both a little uncomfortable with it, but it needs to be done, to get Norm back into a regular heartbeat. We have to go to the Cardiac Intensive Care Unit to do it and we have been there a lot, when Norm was very sick. so it is a little creepy. They are awesome there tho, so, if anything should happen, they are right on top of it. The have saved Norm more than once.

I will update tonight as to what the doctor said today.

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. Ralph Waldo Emerson