Shine On You Crazy Diamond

It was a typical day in the Bogar house, the other day.

The girls were running around the house playing with a couple of our little neighbor friends.  In the midst of doing laundry I got a call from Sienna for help.  Actually it was more of a cry.  She desperately wanted a dress out of Addie's closet.  I got it down for her, and her sobs turned into giggles of delight as I helped her put it on.

The next couple minutes I just sat and watched her sweet little two year old face beam with pride.  She was glowing.  There was no question that Sienna was feeling beautiful, proud, and alive.

The dress was 3 sizes too big for her,  her hair had that "I've spent my afternoon somersaulting around the couch" look about it, she had soap residue wiped across her face (because ya know...she had just stripped down naked and escaped into the bathtub for a "dry" shower wiping soap and shampoo all over her body, and we hadn't washed it off yet.) and to top off the look she was wearing Addie's snow boots.

By most standards the girl looked a hot mess. She didn't care what anyone else in that room thought, she felt alive.  She didn't care that she didn't know any great dance moves, or that there was no music on, she started to dance anyway.  And she danced all over the room giggling and smiling the whole time.  Nothing mattered from the outside because on the inside she was at peace with herself.

The truth is she was SO beautiful, crazy hair and all because her heart is so pure, and joy was exuding from her.  All I could think was "man I love my babies so much".

And to my babies, I hope you always remember how perfect you are, just the way God made you.  

Shine on you crazy diamonds!

Home is Wherever I'm With You

I made this for Brandon two Valentines Day's ago.
Its super amateur and a little cheesy but there is just something about a video montage that just gets to me.  In a good way.  

I really should update this so Sienna came make some more appearances.  But oh well.  I'm too lazy.

Here it is.

The good the bad the ugly...home is still wherever I'm with these people.  

Happy Valentines Day!

Love Bombs

I am such a sucker for holidays.  

Now I'm not the type to decorate and go all out for each one, however I love doing a little something fun to make it a special day.  

We started a tradition last year that I very well intend to do as long as my girls live with us.  I take that back, maybe I'll be "that" crazy mom and keep doing it when they're in college.  I'm not gonna lie, I'm pretty excited about embarrassing them when they're older.  This might be a great place to start.  hehe  

Here's what we did.  So simple but fun.  We snuck into Addie and Sienna's rooms while they were sleeping tonight and filled them up with pink and red balloons.  Inside each balloon is a note from us saying something we love about them.  So when they wake up for Valentines day tomorrow they get to pop the balloons and read their little love notes. 

Addie LOVED this last year.  

   I can't wait to hear their reactions when they wake up and see the balloons.  

 Hopefully they feel the love tomorrow. 

My Birthday: 32 Ways We Paid It Forward

My birthday is just around the corner and I don't have anything special planned, so let's reminisce about my birthday last year.  Because it was awesome.  

I wanted to share, not to brag, but to hopefully inspire someone to have a day as fulfilling as this birthday was for me.  

I can't lie.  I've been pretty blessed in my life so I decided I wanted to spend the day paying it forward with an act of kindness for each year of my life.  It turned out to be an amazing day.  I don't know how many times I cried, but I know it was at least 3 or 4.  It was SO cool to see how even the smallest things were SO appreciated.  

So here is what we did.  

We left quarters in all the gum ball machines at the grocery store.

We collected coats, hats, and scarves from some generous neighbors 

and donated a huge bin of them to the homeless shelter. 

I made fun Christmas tree waffles for my girls.

We baked muffins for the local firefighters and gave them a card thanking 

them for all they do for our community.  They were probably the sweetest and showed the most gratitude out of anyone all day.  They said thank you so many times and wouldn't let Addie

leave without all kinds of fun little trinkets.

I got up early with Addie and Sienna and let Brandon sleep in.  

Personally I think this counts as like 5 acts of kindness because I definitely like to sleep in.

  Especially when its my birthday.  

I left Operation Beautiful notes on bathroom mirrors. 

I took a break to have lunch with my mom and sister (and the Little Angel, of course). 

 They insisted on treating me to lunch

so I left our server an extra tip.

We cleaned up tons of garbage in parking lots.  

With the help of Miss Adison, we passed out lollipops to

 siblings and visitors at the childrens hospital.  

We held doors open for people.  

We donated food to the Utah Food Bank.

We delivered a little "get well" package to a sick friend. 

Left a treat and a thank you note in our mailbox for the postal worker.  

We made and delivered gift bags for all the kids with cancer at the Primary Children's Hospital.  

We wouldn't have been able to do this one without generous donations from friends.  We gave the kids coloring books, stuffed animals, nail polish, toy cars, lip gloss, bubbles, silly puddy, etc. etc.  

We weren't allowed to go into the kids rooms but the nurses were really excited to pass them out.  

This one was one of the more spontaneous of the day but also my favorite.  EVERYONE should try this sometime.  Its SO much fun.  Seriously.

We noticed a cashier at the grocery store who seemed like she could use a little pick me up. So we grabbed a few different gift cards and went to her check stand.  I told her that I was shopping for someone I didn't know very well and asked her which gift card she would want if it was for her.  She said Macy's and went on and on about why she would choose it. After  I bought it I said "oh wait, this is for you.  Merry Christmas."  She was stunned and speechless, even though it wasn't a huge amount.    She just stared at us as her eyes started to well up.  It felt so good to make her happy.

We took donuts to our favorite story tellers at the library.  

While we were at the library my cousin Abby and I left encouraging notes in the self help books.

We got a gift certificate at Walmart for Walmart and handed it to the woman behind us in line. 

We were oh so sneaky and hid dollar bills in the dollar toy section, with notes that said "For you.  Merry Christmas."

We bought toys to donate to Toys For Tots.

We tried to pay for the car behind us in line at Del Taco but after stalling for a while no one showed up behind us.  So instead we gave the cute little lady who worked there a note and little tip.  

I bought my cousin lunch.  

This one was the most meaningful to me.  My 3rd grade teacher was one of the most caring, kind, good hearted people I've ever known.  My mom was out of state in the hospital for a few months while I was in her class and she filled a little bit of that "mother" role for me.  She was always interested in how I was doing, and she'd stay and talk to me during recess when I'm sure most teachers are dying for a break.  I've thought about her over the years so I sent her a letter telling her how much I appreciated her.  

We passed out HotHands to the Salvation Army bell ringers and donate some money while we were there.  Bless their hearts, its freakin' cold out there in the winter!

We smiled at everyone we passed, and tried to be extra friendly all day.  

We donated to this cute boy who has Leukemia.  

We returned carts for shoppers at the grocery store.  Let me remind you it was FREAKIN' FREEZING so that is one that I would totally love if someone did it for me.

We went to the Laundromat and left quarters on each of the washing machines.  Those slick moves of Brandon's were a nice little bonus. 

It was a freakin' awesome birthday!  Everyone should do this at least once.  It's a lot of work but, as cheesy as it may sound, you're the one who really benefits from it all at the end of the day.  TRUTH!

Love Is More Important Than Being Right

          

                                                                      

I usually like to write about things that make me laugh, or things that I love but I've had something on my mind that I felt needed to be said.

A couple of days ago 14 year old David Q. Phan committed suicide, not too many miles from where I live.  It was all over the news, and you can read the article here:

http://www.ksl.com/?sid=23176970&nid=148&s_cid=article-related-3

This news was heartbreaking to hear and has been weighing on my mind ever since I heard it.

Students at his junior high said that David was a kid that was always happy, and always nice to everyone.  His friends also told news outlets that he was often bullied for being gay.

Absolutely heartbreaking.

Here is a 14 year old boy whose life became so unbearably painful that he just couldn't go on.  Whether the bullying was a direct cause or not we may never know.  Whether he was gay or not, we may never know.  But the fact is, that this happens everywhere, everyday.

It's easy for us adults to wonder how kids can be so cruel to one another.  We ask ourselves what we can do to get our our kids to treat each other with more respect.  We point the finger from a supposed position of innocence crying "this bullying must stop!"

The sad truth, that I've witnessed, is that it's the adults who are often the biggest bullies.

We judge each other in the name of religion.  We judge each other based on our own political beliefs.  

I believe that God put some people on this earth for the purpose of teaching others to love.

It's harder for some of us to love those who are different.  We search for religious reasons to back up our discomfort. We foolishly tell ourselves that if our religious/political beliefs can back up our reason to hate, that it isn't hate at all.

Talking down about someone is never okay.  Talking about someones inherent traits as if they are is "evil" or "wrong" is never okay.

Our kids hear the way we speak with disgust about others who may not fit into our mold of what we think is right or wrong.  They hear and repeat the things we say.

I'm sitting here typing, with tears streaming down my face, because this means so much to me.

I  almost lost someone very close to me, on two separate occasions for reasons similar to this.  I will never forget the feeling.  The feeling of knowing that someone that I love, and love dearly, almost left this earth because their God given differences, were too much of a burden to bear.

He deeply feared that the people in his life wouldn't accept him for who he is, because of religious beliefs.  He felt, because of hateful things other adults had said, that everyone would be better off without a gay man in their life.

It's not right, and it's not fair.

No one should feel that way.

Why can't we celebrate our differences?  Why can't we love with open arms instead?

In my heart I believe that love is always the answer.  From my experiences in life, I believe that my God will never be disappointed by his children showing love, and non-judgmental acceptance of one another.

Love is more important than being right.  It's as simple as that.

I know I can do better, and I will try every single day.

Please feel free to share this post with others, and share your experiences in the comments below.  

Walls Shmalls

I love this quote.  I love my family.  And I sometimes really love where I live. 

I need to run myself over to Costco and make one of those giant poster sized prints of this baby and pin it up on my wall.  

Or maybe tape it to my ceiling so I can remember this quote as I think my last thoughts of the day.  

I've spent way too much of my life feeling confined, trapped in my own body, and living someone elses beliefs.  Feeling like I need to be everything to everybody.  I don't know why its taken me so long to realize that that just isn't possible.  

I can only be myself.  And that is a beautiful thing.

Its time to start taking ownership of my life, break down those walls I've built for myself and feel FREE. 

Control is My Thing And I've Got Lots of It

You know what's great about being a parent? The fact that things always go as planned.  Its comforting to know that the more I give and love and the harder I work the more my little people will do exactly as I say.  Their minds are fairly easy to control.  They hardly have opinions at all.  Their motto is: Moms way is the right way.

Take for example yesterday.  This is precisely how I planned for Sienna's nap to go.

When I got Sienna dressed to go grocery shopping the other day this is exactly how I hoped she'd re-style herself for the day.

When I asked the girls if they wanted to listen to the Bieb's song "Boyfriend" my intention was to start a 2 year old on 6 year old sister girl fight over who's boyfriend Justin really is.

Don't be fooled.  Sienna was strictly advised to climb these pantry shelves.  Work those muscles baby.  Work it.  We feel that exercise routines are important to start at even a young age.

Ice cream for breakfast before mom even knows you're awake and out of bed?  Yes.  Hell yes.  Calcium, people.  Its loaded with the goodness of calcium.

Lets pause for just a moment so I may have the opportunity to pat myself on the back.  Control is my thing and I've got lots of it around here. 

Yeah, that might be a slight (total) stretch of the truth.

 Embracing flexibility has been the most important thing I've learned to do since I became a mom. When things happen that throw my day off (you know, like Sienna pooping her pants and wiping it all over her room to "clean" it up as I'm trying to head out the door). I sometimes want to punch somebody.  And then kick them.  And maybe punch them again. And also wipe poop all over their room.  (Have I gone too far?)  But the days when I can find the humor in the craziness, and laugh instead of cry (after cleaning up the poop, of course), those are the days I cherish.  Those are the days I will remember with fondness.  Those are the days where I hope my girls will know how much I unconditionally love them, messes, craziness and all.  

And it doesn't hurt to see sweetness like this every now and then either.

Couldn't love these precious cuties any more than I do.