FAILURE

I really hate this funk I've been in with myself these last few weeks. No matter what I'm doing in my life, whether it being work, the kids, Douglas, the gospel, exercising, ect, I feel like a BIG, FAT failure in them and get way down on myself!! I know it's stupid and very pathetic to be feeling this way and I try to focus on positive things and be happy, but I always end up upset and become a stupid, emotional wreck!! It is SO frustrating! I really need to sit down, look at all the things I'm doing, and try to re-organize everything in my life. It is so chaotic right now and I feel like I can't get a hold of myself! I am so mad too because I look at my life and think, why the hell am I feeling this way? I have a great life, beautiful kiddos, and a wonderful husband, plus I can't complain with everything I'm doing and have in my life! So, why the hell Amanda? Why am I seeping back in this stupid depression that I have strived for SO long to get rid of?? I see the people in my life that dwell in it and it disgusts me, so why am I allowing myself to feel these things? I'm sure this too shall pass, but I'm just annoyed and needed to vent a little bit. Hoping for a better look on things tomorrow. I have so much to look forward in this week and am praying for some postitve energy to get me back to my happy self again.

FRIENDSHIP

Here's a little poem to share today. These last few weeks have been very stressful and hard for me, but with the amazing support I have had from my sweet friends, it makes life a little less chaotic, and gives me the strength I need to keep going! So blessed for the friendships in my life!