Haiku - 1

Don’t talk, let me blossom
in this dreamy moment of life, for,
tomorrow I cease to exist.

This is my first attempt at Haiku and I think I have done pretty well.

Haiku is a poetic form and a type of traditional poetry from the Japanese culture... an unrhymed poem composed of three lines of five, seven, and five syllables respectively. It typically presents an intense emotion or vivid image of nature in simple words. Haikus are usually not complicated. They often describe everyday themes and usually attempt to give people a new view of common situations.

There are a few simple rules for writing in this form of poetry.

1. Three lines of verse consisting of five, seven, and five syllables.
2. Each haiku must contain a seasonal word, may not strictly be a typical one. For example Cherry blossoms commonly denote spring, mosquitoes are used for summer, and snow means winter.

I hope to write some more verses in this form of expression.

Current song- Tum Hamein YuN Bhula Na Paaoge – Md. Rafi
Technorati Tags: Haiku Language

Symptoms of a foreign returned

One of my distant friends is coming back from abroad. This is what is expected of him by his family and friends for some initial months. Needless to say, I also do some of these but more as a habit since childhood and not because I come back from a foreign land.

- Will drink and carry mineral water and always speak of health consciousness.

- Will sneeze and say 'Excuse me'. (I always do that since my childhood)

- Will say "Yogurt" instead of "Curds".
say "Cab" instead of "Taxi".
say "Candy" instead of "Chocolate".
say "Cookie" instead of "Biscuit".
say "got to go" instead of "Have to go".
And many more..

- Will not forget to crib about air pollution and any other type of pollution.

- Will look for a dustbin everywhere to throw candy wrappers etc. & if not found will keep in pocket till he gets one. (This is typical me, so cleanliness freak I am )

- Unknowingly will try to figure all the prices in Forex and utter “Ah ! so cheap.”
- Will try to see the % of fat on the cover of a milk packet.
- Will crib about Indian Standard Time and Indian Road Conditions.

- Will look for a zebra crossing. (Me again. Zebra crossings are so rare in Mumbai)

- Will avoid eating more chilli (hot) stuff.
- Will try to drink "Diet Coke", instead of Normal Coke.
- Will try to complain about any thing in India as if experiencing it for the first time.
- Will pronounce "schedule" as "skejule", "module" as "mojule" , "today" as "to die" and some more depending on where he is coming from.

- Will say “Thank you” even to vegetable vendor. (Typical me. Sometimes I wonder how pointlessly well mannered I am) ;) lollll

Have you or anyone known to you faced such foreign returned symptoms ?

Current song- Kahin Door Jab Din Dhal Jaaye – Mukesh

Mulgi Shikli Pragati Zhali – III

Before I narrate this final part, my humble request to all dear readers to actively comment and discuss on this 3 part series. I would like to know about my understanding & interpretation of the local vocab in particular and also about the post in general. The second part will help me in improving the quality of posts. What you liked or disliked about these posts. Feel free to voice your opinions as many times as you wish. I value your opinion. Please spend some time, do it at leisure, and DO it. Thanks.

First, let us have a free ride of Part – I and Part – II. FREEEEEEE?? Me comingggggg..

Ah! That was quite a ride ;)) Isn’t it?

So this boring dull story comes to an end with this equally boring post and even more boring Lady Jasoos. So sad na? Ok, before we get emotional, let me continue and finish it fast. So, me, the Lady Jasoos had full doubts about this ‘Udi’ man’s intentions.

Nevertheless, my one eyebrow went up and my CPU?? Huh, never mind. It was spinning at 1000000 RPM (excuse me non-IT people).. hmm hmm

Udi, Udi, Udi..

Did that mean he knew flying?? But this hefty guy was nowhere near any superman category. But who knows? NO, NO, NO.. I am NOT opening my mouth this time. Come what may.

Anyways, I was happy to have one more addition to my vocabulary.

Two good looking ;) guys were chatting with me (Ahem! For a change Lady Jasoos was happy) and suddenly one of them looking in one direction said, “Oh, my PL (Project Leader (for non-IT people)) is coming this way. Aaj to meri Vaat hai”.

Vaat ??? What?? Vaat = What??..

Some people’s pronunciation is sooo bad, let alone the grammar part. Don’t know from which remote place they do their studies. And who tells them to join this industry when they can’t even make a proper sentence? Now, what sense does his sentence make “Today is my what?”. Stoooopid guys.

My big grin had turned into an even bigger grrrrrr and while I was still trying to make sense out of that Vaat thing, and then.. .. then as in series of bomb blasts, the other guy dropped another one. “Chal beta kalti mar le”.

Kalti??? Oh no, not again!!! Was about to scream “Mommyyyyyyyyyy”. My gray cells had started turning black and my face red. The chilled Lady Jasoos was turning into a grilled one.

By now, I had started cursing myself for deciding to shift to Mumbai. I could manage in some languages but these stupid silly things were driving me crazy. Oh la la..

During lunch hour one day all of us wanted to have ice-cream. I looked at the menu. Ahaa !! There it is something new, “Sitaphal” ice-cream. Always ready to try out new things, I ordered the same wondering how it would be. First bite – Ummm delicious but didn’t have the taste what I was expecting. Second bite- I tried hard again to have the flavour of “Sitaphal” but no, it tasted altogether different to me.

Not wanting to make a fool of myself, summoned the waiter asking him what had he brought for me. “Sitaphal icecream, Madam” prompt came the reply. Girl sitting next to me tasted one bite of it and confirmed. I was not ready to believe that my taste buddies had divorced me in the prime of my youth. I’ve had green-peas ki barfi, cauliflower kheer, gajar halwa in the past and they had not given any strain to my taste-buddies, then why this stupid Sitaphal ice-cream? NOW, I said to myself, is the time to break the promise. Tried asking in a different way “How big a Sitaphal have you seen?”, “How do you normally eat a Sitaphal?” etc etc. I could see question marks on their faces but I had to find it out for the sake of my sanity.
According to them, Sitaphal was a fruit, but for me it was a vegetable. Uh uh, these guys were making mistake, didn’t know the difference between a fruit & a veggie- calling pumpkin a fruit !! PUMPKIN ??? They all jumped & shouted in unison “It’s Custard Apple”. It was my turn now to fall off the chair. :((

Many rhyming words like jhakaas, Bindaas are making me Khallaas (ohhhhh that one rhymed;)).. while loads of other words like raapchik, bhangar, yeda are still meaningless to me. I dare not to open my mouth lest..

I know one of ‘Parvarna’ & ‘waaparna’ means unaffordable but which one is that, I am at a loss. Similarly difference between ‘koodi’ & ‘udi’.. aaj tak samajh nahi aaya. If one is jump then what’s the other? And in what context do we use them?

It took me some months to understand that Aai shapath = Maa kasam (I still think so, someone please correct me if I am wrong) and Haaila, which I thought is an acronym of Haye Allah is NOT always used only by our Muslim brothers.

Anyways, I am an optimist, a keen observer, and a fast learner with ‘Never Say Die’ attitude. Looking at my alacrity, I am sure very soon I’ll master them all. :))

P.S. My Marathi is even better. ;) pan tikde ek problem aahe..

I request my fellow Marathi speaking friends to correct me if I go wrong somewhere. Mee tumchi aabhaari rehnaar.

Glossary of words used in this series: Some of them I picked up in office, others from day-to-day life.

Ghaai = Jaldi as in Jaldi hai kya? => Ghaai hai kya?
Gardi = Bheed (Hindi) = crowded
Ghadi = fold
Pakaana = bore karna
Udi = either jump or hop
Koodi = either jump or hop depending on Udi
Vaat = Shaamat (Hindi) as in aaj meri shaamat hai => aaj meri vaat hai
Kalti marna = something like (patli gali se nikalna) in Hindi
Sitaphal = custard apple = pumpkin (north India)
In Mumbai pumpkin is bhopla and that confuses me with zhopla (sleeping). Oh Oh too many rhymings. ;) I wonder what “bhopla zhopla” means? Pumpkin sleeping? ;) oh oh atta mee zhopli :P

Nakki = pakka (Hindi) = sure (English)
Kalingar = Tarbooz (hindi) = water melon.. this was a tough one for me. For months people were quoting kalingar in jokes and I was dumbfounded.
‘Parvarna’ & ‘waaparna’ = one of them is unaffordable, for other I am at a loss.
Haaila = Haye Allah (my guess)
Aai shapath = I swear = Maa kasam (My great logic.. since aai = mother, shapath=kasam/ swearword)
Mama = Thulla (north indian Hindi) = traffic policeman (English)

Current song- Lagi Tumse Man ki Lagan - Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan

Mulgi Shikli Pragati Zhali – II

Whether you have read it or not, please read Part – I before reading this post for better continuity (or just for the heck of it ;)). I promise, I won’t proceed further till you finish. Waiting here for you.

Ok, done? Thanks. :))

So, the story goes like this. Once upon a time, there was a pretty little birdie named Cuckoo who shifted her nest to Mumbai..

Suddenly there was a tight slap on my face. “Oh come on, tell us the part II. Not interested in your boring story”.

Ouch!! Who did it? Huh? :((

Ok, so my self-made dictionary was swelling in size day by day. Some of these instances made me sit and think if I really was that bright? And as always, I was forced to have big bright grin on my face. I was learning new things. Yippeee…

But at other times I felt let down. Let down, because I FELT, by now some people had become aware of my knowledge of local vocab and at times they purposefully changed the conversation into their Hindi when they saw me coming their way. Just to have fun at my expense, I presume?? Grrrr..

This made me more quiet and observant all the time. I was almost tight-lipped. Though I wanted to shake the hand(s) of friendship offered by them, most of the time I ended up suspecting them for forming some conspiracies against me (purely my assumption). And so, a “Lady Jasoos” was born.

Once I even tried to tiptoe (with ears all up, eyes as sharp as an eagle) to their territory just to find out if they speak normally like that or only when they see me. But no luck :((

When I was new to my office, all my male colleagues were competing hard (of course, with all their good intentions), to impress me by helping in every little thing, even when I didn’t want any. How and what all they did over the period of time will NOT come in this post. Sorry.

Ok, let us come to the point.

On a particular day during break, some of them gathered around me, pulling each other’s leg in an attempt to have my full attention. One guy told me pointing to another “Ye bahut pakaata hai”.

“Oh, good. What all do you cook?” was my spontaneous question (with a big smile) to that other guy. There was a pin drop silence for 1.00000438 seconds and then to my utter surprise, everybody burst into non-stop laughter (literally ROFLing), so much so that some had tears in their eyes, and others, hot coffee on their clothes and all over the carpet. Now what??? Was there any hidden joke? I was utterly confused.

Enough is enough !! I am NOT (in CAPS, Bold, Underlined & bigger font size) going to open my mouth till I am dead sure of the meaning, I pledged to myself. These stooopid guys, what do they think of themselves?? Huh? Why do they do this to me?

I was terribly disturbed, always in deep thoughts, juggling with new wordology.

On another day, I overheard someone talking about potholes and suddenly changing to Hindi “Main udi maarke aaya”. Urghhh!! Another challenge?? Do these guys do it purposely, to check the depth my knowledge? Why do they have to speak near me? Did I see him slyly looking at me from the corner of his eye and smiling? The Lady Jasoos had full doubts about his intentions.

To be continued….

Current song- Dream Girl, kisi Shayar ki Ghazal.. Dream Girl – Kishore

Mulgi Shikli Pragati Zhali – I

When I shifted to Mumbai, little did I know I would be showered by such pleasant surprises on a day-to-day basis.

Right from its rains to local trains,

Missing zebra crossings to manners of road crossing,

Never ending road repairs to state of affairs

Life so vibrant, people so resilient

Ganpati Visarjan to Navratri Dandiyas,

The Hindi jargon to to to (Oh, forget it)... Oh, everything was so very different.

Wow ! It was going to be fun filled Mumbai for someone as remotely connected to it as me. I was enthralled by its powerfully diverse eloquence. Today I will talk about only one of those - the language… the Mumbaiya bhasha that has fascinated me immensely.

There are many instances, which made me look bamboozled. Here, I have jotted down some of them.

Well, to start with, even before coming to Mumbai, I was aware that some of the kitchen stuff / vegetables are called differently in Mumbai like Potato/onion are batata/kanda, salt is meeth. Egg would become baida and pyaaz ke pakode would be nicely replaced by kanda bajjiya’s …so far so good, I could deal with them easily on daily basis.

But hold on.... there was a lot more in store for me.

Once our maid forgot to bring her umbrella. “Subah subah ghaai mein bhool gayi”. Ghaai??? Or was it ghia? But then ghia also didn’t make any sense here. Ghia happens to be a vegetable in north India. How could she forget her umbrella in a vegetable? Maybe a slip of tongue. I gave some work to my ever-alert brains. Oh I see, all she wanted to say that she left it in a vegetable shop while buying ghia. I pat myself for having such a presence of mind.

One morning my colleague came panting to the office. “Train mein kitna Gardi tha aaj”. Gardi???

Darn!! Here comes another alien word for me. But I don’t give up so easily. Being an introvert, instead of asking him what is he talking about, I coaxed my smart brains to start working again.

Hmmm hmm hmm “Garmi” & “Sardi” are two weather conditions I know and maybe this “Gardi” was somewhere between them. I rolled my eyes with utmost joy. Yessss, I had guessed it right. So, they call it “Gardi”. How sweet of Mumbai people to think of such a lovely intermediate name.

Gardi = (Garmi + Sardi) + a touch of Humidi(ty).

My seventh sense reconfirmed my logic. Oh, if only I had applied my logical brains while programming, I would have got double promotions all the time (My eyes are now set for PM’s post).

Ok ok, come to the point now. So, that’s why this poor guy is panting so heavily. I smiled back to him “Yeah, aajkal bahot gardi hai, especially in this monsoon season”. He gave me a strange look, without uttering a word.

Nevertheless, I was amazingly surprised at my intelligence level and grasping power. I congratulated myself at the rate I was picking up the local vocab. My confidence level had reached a new height.

Recently, when employing the new maid, I did my two-bit to ask her a few questions. Confidently I asked “Kya-kya karogi?” Among other things, she made gesture of folding clothes and said “Kapde ka Ghadi lagake rakhegi”.

Ghadi??? Oh ok, she’d fold the clothes on time. Eh? What’s the big deal? She has to do it anyways on time or else why on earth are we paying her so much? Being a Sunday I was home and my mother thanked me for my presence at that moment; she couldn’t have handled this kind of interpretation alone. Brainy me. :))

To be continued…

Current song- Chookar Mere Man ko, Kiya Tune Kya Ishara – Kishore