Loosing of Half of our Income: The Journey Back Begins

With all of the financial issues people are having these days I decided to share our story.

For almost 16 years my husband dedicated himself to building a career in a big box store.  He gave, and gave, and gave and never got anything back from them.  They put us through more hardships than you can shake a stick at including not giving him time off when his dad died, forced relocations without compensation, always having to work the overnight remodels, a forced commute when we couldn't sell the house, bankruptcy, foreclosure, and they turned him down for a promotion because of their own stupid rules even though.  He really deserved it, was requested, he would have done well at it too and they were ready to give it to him before they realized his store hadn't made profit sharing 11 months before that. You didn't dare say anything to them because of a fear of losing your job, they fired people for really stupid reasons.  (And then they wonder why they can't find employees willing to do into management with them?)  Talk about stress!

His job paid well and he doesn't like to start over all the time.  He liked the job for the most part until the latest boss arrived and made his life a living hell.  After several years of the same treatment and no changes occurring even when he told their untrained personnel manager (who didn't report this to corporate), he couldn't take it anymore and he quit without having another job in place.  It was such a hostile work environment I really couldn't blame him, though it would have been nice to have a plan in place before it happened.

Since it was ruled that he quit (even though we tried for hostile work environment) there was no unemployment either. Because his job paid well I didn't need to have a job prior to this happening.  (Except for when they made our tenant move from the home he was renting from us, or the time they made us pay hundreds more in commuting when he was "promoted" with no pay raise, or the time they didn't make profit sharing so we had no way to pay off the credit cards we had been relying on to pay for his commuting expenses.)  That made it really hard to struggle through several months of having no income at all.  Thankfully, we had finally gotten enough of a handle on our budget because of our past trials that we had been able to save some money which got us through the jobless period.  I applied for food stamps and badge care right away even though they had treated me extremely rudely the last time I had been in the office.  Our mortgage company set us up on a forebearance plan that allowed us to pay $25 each for both our first and our second mortgages so our main expenses were paying for gas (to see his mom who was failing in health as well as driving for interviews and such) and my car payment.

Now, we need to adjust to living on less than half of what he made last year.  This is where the real struggle begins.  With a couple of months of work at his new employer in place we are really hitting the budget juggle hard.  We have a brand new car that I bought a little over a year ago, a house payment, 2 kids, 2 cats, and we live in the country about 12 miles from town.

So far his new employers have agreed to pay for his gas, we have applied for a loan modification, and are getting the food stamps and medical assistance that we were getting over the summer though we get much less in food this month and now have to pay a monthly payment for our insurance.  We have many more changes to try to do too in order to come up with a balanced budget as well.  Hopefully we will be able to refinance the car to bring that payment down, I am praying that our mortgage company works with us so we can keep our home with a much more affordable payment, we found a less expensive phone plan, and I will be looking around for cheaper insurance.  I also applied for energy assistance though I have yet to hear back about that.

We have already cut WAY back on energy usage, we rarely ever eat out, we don't exchange gifts with adults so we only have the 2 kids to buy for, we don't attend away sporting events unless we can hitch a ride with someone else who is going, we never go anywhere except to buy groceries or the occassional splurge allowed because we sold something, we never buy anything unless it is either used, practically free (those mail in rebates can come in handy sometimes!), or off the 90% off clearance rack (Man, I have had to wear some very ugly clothes because of that one!).

I will fill you in on some other changes we do as time progresses.  Right now I guess we are still on the forebearance program at the bank until they tell me what my loan modification payment is going to be.  I have been through this process before.  You have to pay EXACTLY what they tell you to (not a penny more or a penny less) by the due date or they will kick you right off the program.  It can be extremely stressful for sure!

Wish us luck and prayers for us would be greatly appreciated!

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message. I'd love to hear your thoughts! Cindy

I Give UP!!!!

Have you ever felt like you could just collapse on the floor in a huge blubbering pile? Like nothing in the world will ever go your way again? As if you need to take out a white flag and wave it for everyone to see and call a truce? The endless barrage of hardships and difficulties are just too much to bear!

I don't know what has been going on the last 5 years so that nothing will ever go our way, but I am at my wits' end. It just seems like it's one thing after another. As soon as we start to see the clouds breaking up, more clouds roll right in to take their place. It's just one never ending storm after another. I feel empty and hopeless. I am truly at a loss and no one will help us. I feel like I am in a bottomless pit of quicksand from which there is no escape. I have a feeling that the depression is trying to move back in and take back over my life, but I don't want it to.

I am usually a pretty optimistic person. I know it is always darkest before the dawn, really I do. I have made many batches of lemonade out of my pile of lemons, and some earrings, lemon bars, lemon sherbet, lemon bread, lemon meringue pie, lemon drops, lemon chicken, lemon poppy seed muffins, and lovely scented soaps too. But I am running out of things to make with these lemons and I would really like to get something else instead. Did you know that we have had 10 qualifying hardships within the last 5 years? I am sure I could find even more than that too if I tried. Sad. Pathetic. Unnatural.

Why does no one see my pain? Why will no one reach out a helping hand? Why does everyone think my business is none of their business? Even when I ask for help, no one will help. They won't see my need, it's like they put blinders on, plug their ears and sing a merry tune until I have talked so much I can't talk anymore. They change what I tell them to ease their guilt and so that they are able to do their worst to me. I am sick of it.

Bad service, rising expenses, job transfers, job losses, botched rentals, home sale staging, deaths, depression, short sale, foreclosure, credit clampdowns, home repairs, credit counseling, stress, illness, refinancing, medical debt, loan modifications, I could go on and on. All the while I always try to do the right thing and take care of my debts at the expense of our family and our life. It's sickening really. Why won't it stop? Why do these things keep happening to me? I need to put an end to this vicious cycle.

Everyone has a plan, and everyone tells me what to do when they can't help me. When I tell them I've tried that already, they simply tell me that I must have done it wrong or that I need to do X as well. They tell me someone else will help and pretend to act incredulous and disgusted when I tell them that didn't work either.

Can't anyone just listen, support a person, and help them out? Why does everyone feel the need to require documentation of everything even though I have never told any lies about my situation? Why can't we prepare for something bad that is going to happen when we know in advance it will happen simply because it has yet to happen?

Yeah, I know I have a lot of questions. Why can't anyone answer any of them? Doesn't anyone else have these kinds of questions too? Hasn't this kind of thing been happening all over the world? Why is no one willing to help a person simply to be helpful, not just because a law says they have to?

Apparently no business, no government program, and no job performance bonus is going to get us out of this mess. Only God can and only God will. How do I give this all up for him to deal with when all I do is worry about tomorrow? How do I give it all up into God's hands? I want to give up.

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message, I'd love to hear your thoughts! Cindy

The New American Middle Class

It used to be that people in the middle class owned their own home, had money to buy all of the necessities that their families needed, had decent saving accounts, 401K's, didn't need to live paycheck to paycheck, and were able to take a family vacation every year even if it was just going to a nearby campground just to get away. It seems that picture has done a whole lot of changing over the last few years and I am not really liking the direction that our country is heading. Families do not leave their homes, pack lunches for every family member every day, wear the same clothes year after year even after they are tattered and stained, there is no room for any emergencies as saving have been eaten up by increased expenses, homes are on the brink of foreclosure, there is a lot of deficit spending just to keep the same lifestyle we have always led.

Now more than ever we are all finding ourselves struggling. Some of us have never had to put up with some of the situations we are finding ourselves in, and it can be a scary place to be. We are needing to be creative and make some major cutbacks in our lifestyle in order to keep the same standard of living that we have always had. Some are clueless as to how they can do this and are petrified of having to change their lives.

What lead to this state of affairs? No pay raises for years at a time, increasing costs of living, forced job transfers, not being able to sell our homes, decreased credit availability, declining home values, foreclosures, increased taxes and medical expenses, businesses who have no regard for positions people are finding themselves in, banks who are unwilling to help struggling homeowners, job losses, increased disease caused by new stresses that we are not used to dealing with, shrinking 401Ks as well as other savings avenues, and reduced work hours available are just some of the problems that have contributed to this new reality.

It seems like this problem is insurmountable. It looks like a giant mountain that we are both unwilling and unable to climb and conquer. What is there to do but to throw our hands into the air and give up? Now, more than ever, we need to pull together and make some sacrifices. We need to help those that are in need of help even though we may not think they need it. We need to band together and take care of each other. We need to have less focus on our short term profits and more focus on the gains that can be made in the long term.

Being just one person, what can we do to make the world a better place? I will give you some ideas of things that we have done as well as things that could be done if people weren't so hung up on following the highest profit line they can get. Some of these ideas are things that we can do to help ourselves, while others are ideas that we can use to help those around us which may indirectly benefit us as well.

When I found myself with less cash flow than we have traditionally had, I found ways to stretch our budget. I switched out all of our regular light bulbs for CFLs, turn on less lights at night, turn down the thermostat when no one is home, and run all of our televisions and other electronics on power strips so they do not use electricity when they are not turned on. Instead of buying clothes at the retail stores I used to frequent I found myself buying them at garage sale or thrift shops, same with other household necessities such as plates, books, and pot. Recreating clothing that we already own is a great way to save money. Why not make that shirt with the stains on it into an art project that your children can proudly wear to school? Those pants that are too short can easily be turned into a jean skirt or jean shorts. Making our own foods from our homegrown garden has also been a Godsend to our budget woes. Sugar free blackberry jam in the stores was $5 per jar. Picking the blackberries from the woods and making our own saves us a lot of cash. That $5 easily buys enough pectin to make at least a dozen jars of jam if not more. Who ever thought before this all began that I would learn how to make my own green cleaners, sausage, dog food, canned veggies, frozen soups, broths, and dried herbs?

Businesses can help people too. If you can't afford to give them a discount, at least work with them so they can fit your goods and/or services into their budget. If they say they can't afford the bill and try to arrange things to make everything more affordable for them, believe them. Charge an affordable interest rate and don't change all kinds of extra fees just to add to their misery and to your bottom line. Then the business will not loose customers and the customers can still afford services on an affordable payment plan. I think it is despicable when a business tells a person to sell their home at a large loss or spend all of their life savings just to get paid sooner. What will they do the next time? There IS going to be a next time, you DO know that, right? Why can't we spend more time helping others who are also struggling to get their feet under them so they can then pay that kindness forward? If they can afford the payment then you will not have to worry about these customers declaring bankruptcy costing you even more money either.

Banks can lower a current customer's interest rate. If they are already your customer and they are paying their bills in a timely manner why not try to help them make their payment more affordable if they request your assistance? This will free up some of their cash so they can spend it to help stimulate the economy. This will indirectly help a bank as they have invested their customer's money into various stock markets. Increased spending will increase the value of those holdings earning the bank more income thereby helping the bank as well as it's customers.

Insurance companies don't need to keep adding a 10% increase to their customer's charges every year either. If people feel less taken advantage of they will be less likely to take advantage of others.

I also feel that fraud and lawsuits are destroying our country. People seem to be looking for a quick profit around every corner. Taking people to court costs everyone money, as does charging for services not actually provided. Even those of us who aren't even involved in the situation. That is how prices got as over inflated as they have. Businesses don't eat the cost of these lawsuits and payouts themselves, they divide the cost and spread it out as increases to all of the other customers weather it's insurance or some other business. Why do you think our cost of insurance has risen so dramatically over the last 15 years? Certainly not because the equipment is that much better. Think about it. How much does it cost to go to the vet vs going to the doctor? Both went to the same amount of school, but there isn't insurance in most veterinary practices. What about the dentist? I still pay close to the same amount now as I did 13 years ago when we got our dental insurance. Why? Because people are not abusing the dental insurance plans in the same way as they are abusing the other insurance companies. My health insurance cost on the other hand has increased more than 250% over the same amount of time. Are we REALLY that much less healthy?

Start seeing the sanity and refusing to take the easy road, instead take the road less traveled. Help yourself, help others, stop being greedy, and together we will make it through the rough times.

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message, I'd love to hear your thoughts! Cindy

Helping Each Other

In recent days I have been making further attempts to lower my monthly payments so we can get back on track after all of the recent upheaval. I have learned a great many lessons in these attempts and it puzzles me what some places are thinking. Here is my story...

When I was told that I met the qualifications to get a loan modification from our current bank I was extremely happy, because that 6.875% interest rate is killing us. I was told by a great many places that we would not qualify to refinance because of the foreclosure we had in 2008, my bank said a loan modification would be the only way they could lower my interest rate. Fine, I understand with a score of 640 I can see not wanting to take a risk (although I have both a first and second with them both of which have always been paid on time. Well, except that once when I skipped a payment on purpose because their responses when I asked for help was to say I wasn't struggling since I was making on time payments. Besides why wouldn't I pay on time, we do need to keep a roof over our heads.)

If I had a lower house payment, I could pay my husband's commuting expenses monthly instead of each time he gets a bonus from his work. I HATE having to rely on credit cards as they have this habit of checking your credit report and dropping your credit line even if you always pay them on time. I'm not sure how we would survive if my last credit card did the same thing that all of the others have, what bills would I have to skip paying in order to buy him gas? He has been driving this 110 mile per day commute for 2 years now and frankly I am tired of not having the money in each pay check to cover the expense. No one is buying houses in our price range right now if it is not on a lake, so after a year on the market we took it back off.

I follow every rule during each modification period, I keep meticulous records, I pay the bill with plenty of time to spare so it gets there before it is due, and I do everything that their employees ask me to usually involving sending a more recent fax of pay info or an updated hardship letter. I am not sure what it is they decide between the time the modification starts and when it's over but they keep coming up with excuses as to why I don't qualify in the end. I report my expenses, my bank statements back up my financial worksheets and everything. The first excuse was that I don't pay more than 31% of my income on housing and that I can afford to keep my house, the second excuse was that I can just get cheaper health insurance so I don't need a modification (huh?), the third time I can't afford my house and I need to run a short sale on it, this last attempt I finally got them to approve the modification but they will keep the interest rate the same as it was to begin with and lower my payment just a few dollars. Not sure how putting me through 9 months of hell gets me into a better place than I was to start out with, but whatever. I guess I could say at least I passed this time, but it doesn't help free up the money I need for daily living expenses. Apparently though when it's over they have promised to fix my credit back to showing the on time payments that I have been making. I guess we'll see if that's yet another lie that their employees place in front of me while they try to steal our house out from under us.

I think the refusals come down to corporate greed. They don't want to loose any of their precious money that they get each month from my higher interest rates, so they only want to go with a government sponsored program that will pay them to do the right thing. It's just crazy! Since when is it the government's job to pay a business to make their borrowers into better borrowers? Wouldn't they rather a borrower has the foresight to see a problem arising and try to head it off before the bank has to deal with it directly in the way of a foreclosure? Why can't they take the proof provided and not make up monthly income that we do not receive? Why can't they just help a person who needs help? Don't they see that freeing up some of the money I pay to them in interest rate charges could be freed up to help spur the market into economic recovery?

I have run into that very same problem in the health care industry. Our deductibles make us pay thousands of dollars out of pocket every year before they cover any expenses. We have accounts with 2 different clinics that we are paying monthly payments to from previous years of medical bills, they each have an arrangement with the same bill collection agency to get 10% interest to stretch the payments over 3 years. We currently pay $78 to one of the clinics, and $40 to the other. Each is trying to say adding our new balance to the old one will "only" raise our monthly payment $6-12. That's all fine and good, but my husband has not had an hourly pay raise since either the late 90's or early 00's, I told them we can't afford to pay more on a monthly basis. They asked me to send in bank statements, monthly paystubs, and all kinds of other stuff which all back up what I am saying. Instead of looking at what we bring home each month, one of them looked at the amount he gets per year with the once yearly bonus. We use the bonus to pay down our debt, we no longer have that to pay extra bills with. They say we make plenty of money so we don't need their aid in getting our bill paid, I need to arrange with them to pay the bill in full. Apparently they can only help people who fall into guidelines set forth to them by the government. Ah, another place looking to get paid to do the right thing. Don't they think I know our finances better than they do? I am hopeful that I don't run into this same situation with the other clinic since my son has a surgery scheduled there for December.

My husband has also recently been informed that our work sponsored health insurance cost is going to increase another $40 per month to cost us $661.12 total for the 4 of us. That's more than 10% of our gross yearly income and I think that is outrageous. There is NO way we are going to be able to afford that. Since other attempts at less expensive health care has turned out no one willing or able to help us simply because of my weight, I decided see if I qualify for the Wisconsin sponsored health care insurance. Apparently I not only qualify for that, but also for reduced price meals for the kids, food share, and help with our utility bills during the winter months. I only pray that we get an answer fast enough so we can drop the insurance before the open enrollment period is up.

How is it that government can see a need and offer assistance to someone that businesses deem unworthy of helping? Is my doing the right thing and paying my bills on time the thing that makes me unworthy of their assistance? If so, that is totally messed up. It is my opinion that people should always try and do the right thing if it is in their power to do so. I have cut back in every other area of my life, we rarely go anywhere, I only buy clothes off of clearance racks at Goodwill or garage sales, I can and make my own foods, I have one little lamp on at night with a cfl light bulb, turn the heat down at night and when the rest of the family isn't home, my kids can't even afford to eat school lunches so I pack everyone's meals daily before sending them off, I make my own soaps and cleaning supplies,... Housing expenses and health care are the only places I can seek shelter in until our other debts are paid off. I am praying to God that he helps these business people to see reason and they help people who request their aid, not only for myself but for anyone else who is standing in my shoes in similar circumstances. We can't all rely solely on the government to get through this crisis, if we all can do something small in the life of another person we can change the world and make it a better place for everyone to live in.

Why shouldn't we stop and help someone less fortunate than ourselves? Why not buy the homeless person a cup of coffee? Why not donate our kids' used toys to the someone who will use and appreciate them? After all, we don't want to end up like Scrooge do we?

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message, I'd love to hear your thoughts! Cindy

Moving Again?

Well, it's official. We've put our house on the market. I know that now is not the best time to sell and if my husband didn't have such a long commute we probably wouldn't even consider selling right now. I am hoping that all of the hard work we've done here isn't lost on someone trying to snatch up a good deal. We have decided to put it on and wait and see what happens, we just have to have faith that everything will work out for the best. I really don't know what else to do!

It wouldn't be a big deal having a long commute if he worked an 8 hour day or something. There are some days that he works open to close, that's 14 hours. Add two hour commute to that and I get to see him for about 5 minutes before bed. That's not the kind of life I want to lead forever. Something needs to change!

We are going to go out today and see what kinds of places are on the market down in Antigo. I am not worried about finding something we like since we always change whatever we find anyway, I guess you could say it's a hobby of ours. I am more worried about selling the house we live in right now. I will not end up like we did last time!

I guess I'm telling you because I could use a few prayers that our situation will work itself out. Also looking for home sale tips and house hunting ideas. What do you do?

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message, I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

Please Read My Other Blog

I don't usually plug my other blog, but I really think I need to today. In it I write about spiritual matters that may make some of my readers a bit uncomfortable.

This weekend we found out some information that concerns us all greatly. I wrote a story about it on my other blog. If you're prone to praying and don't get turned off by spirituality I request that you pop over and read it and pray for my eldest niece and nephew.

The blog is called I Cannot Live on Bread Alone. (Just check my profile if you can't find it in my sidebar blogs.)

I appreciate any additional prayers they can get. Their court date is supposed to be this Thursday. I forgot to mention this on my other blog, but my sister is acting as her own lawyer and can't afford to physically go to MN to attend court so will do it over the phone. She needs a whole lot of help! Thanks.

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message, I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

Stamp Out Hunger

I just remembered that tomorrow is Stamp Out Hunger Day. You may have forgotten too, so here's your reminder! It's a rather new phenomenon that our wonderful US postal carriers participate in one day per year. You may want to check to see if your local post office participates.

If you don't know what it is, I'd be happy to tell you about it.

We can leave a bag of non-perishable food items by our mailbox before our usual delivery occurs tomorrow morning. I like plastic to use bags for this purpose because it helps to protect the contents inside from the elements.

When the mail is delivered, your postal carrier will pick up the bag(s) of food and the post office will bring the bags of food to your local food shelf.

It's a great way to help keep the food shelves supplied because many people seem to forget about sending food or money to the food shelves when there isn't a big local food drive of some sort going on. I have heard that the utilization of food shelves is far higher now than it has been in past years. I am sure that this economic downturn is a major cause of this need.

I will donate some of our pantry staples tomorrow since we will soon have an abundance of fruits and vegetables to feed my kids from our wonderful new veggie garden. I don't plan on feeding my family much prepackaged food soon anyway if I can talk Cheesehead into following this whole Maker's Diet that I've been reading about. God will provide us with what we need just as he does the chipmunks, rabbits, birds, bears, deer, and squirrels.

It's amazing how many people forget that simple things like soap, ketchup, noodles, bbq sauce, and baked beans don't need to come from cans, boxes, or jars. I used to be one of those people. I'm glad I'm not anymore. Here's hoping that I find enough time to take care of my family, myself, AND my plants throughout this season as well as trying to make healthier versions of commercial products for my family. I'm going to have my hands full, aren't I?

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message, I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

The Banking Industry is A Sham

I am so annoyed with this supposed bail out of the banking system. With all of the money that is being put into the industry by tax payers, it is meant to stop the down slide of our economy, isn't it? It is supposed to help "risky" loans who are current in their payments get lower interest rates, isn't it? It is aimed at loans backed by Fannie May and Freddie Mac, true? Well, I am all of those things. My bank said I may qualify. I was SO happy!

I applied for it. Not wanting Cheesehead's bonuses added into the mix since they can't really be counted on in this economy, I reported our true monthly income to them. We have been able to make the payments for the last almost three years, but I would like to be able to free up a little bit of our money to spend on feeding my family healthier foods as well as attacking our outstanding debts more aggressively.

What did the bank finally come back with after not applying my January payment to my account while it was under review? They said we only qualify for forbearance because our debt to income ratio is too high to be able to give me a lower rate outright. Duh. Why am I trying to get a lower house payment?

The outcome? I called the bank at least once a month while my loan was under review. The bankers advised me not to pay the February or March payments because they would be held in a separate account and also not be applied towards my loan because my loan was under review. Because my payments were not applied to my loan, I was also reported as not paying my loan in a timely manner thus causing two credit cards to cancel my accounts. This will decrease my credit score even more. I also got a letter from the bank saying they would access my late fees to my escrow account. What late fees? I was TOLD not to pay by several of their bankers who further advised me that I should take the money I would use to pay my mortgage to pay down my other debts.

On first glance forbearance seemed like a good option. It reduced my required payment by 1/2 for a six month period so I could pay down my other debts to be reconsidered for loan modification later. Great right? I thought so too until I got the agreement. The last payment was to pay back the other half of each of the skipped six month payments.

I called the bank with my concerns. They said not to worry about that because it could be refinanced into my modified loan at the end. But we weren't guaranteed a modification after we were done with the process and if we did not repay the amount at the end of the period the bank could proceed with foreclosure proceedings.

I don't know about you, but I've believed what bankers have said in the past and it never seems to work out quite as well as they assure me it will. Maybe I should try to have more faith, but I felt really unsettled that forbearance was my only option. I should be willing to let the bank take my house if they decide I don't qualify for loan modification? In an industry teaming with greed and looking out for their own bottom line I just couldn't bring myself to do as they advised.

If I believed that the banks would come through and do the right thing in the end I might attempt it. Somehow I think that doing what's right isn't something they really care about. Can God really block off their greed and force them to do the right thing? In my heart I want to trust that God can make them do the right thing but with Cheesehead not having the faith that I do and so many other financial disasters the bankers have advised us into. I'm sure you can understand my trepidation. I'd need Cheesehead to be behind my decision and I wasn't 100% ready to commit to that plan either.

Am I right to have complaint? Just what are we giving all of those taxes to?

I have been paying my payment every month, just because they think I owe too much money to others shouldn't disqualify me from a modification. It would free up money currently used to pay them so I could pay others. I'm sure that's part of the problem. I've been paying my bills so why should they cut me a break? They can make even more money off of me so why lend a hand to someone who's drowning?

Maybe I should have declared bankruptcy to wipe out those other debts. I'm being punished for taking the high road and trying not to contribute to the economic disaster that so many other people are using to get out of debt? I know many people who have just given up paying things because "everyone else is doing it" and they want to use their money for something else. That's just WRONG!!!!!

I can afford to pay my bills and I will do my best to pay them all off. I just wish I could find a reasonable person to deal with at my bank.

I am going to pray that my husband's bonus this summer is enough to pay off the car we plan on giving to MIL once it's paid off. I think that would also reduce our debt to income ratio enough to get us qualified for loan modification. Maybe I should be so specific? I'll try to put this in God's hands and he'll have to clear the way to make his plan work.

If you have something better or more insightful to pray about for our situation, please do!

Thank you for stopping by to chat with me. Please leave me a message, I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

Why Did We Move to Rhinelander?

I loved living near my family and long time friends. It never occurred to me to want to move from the area that I call my hometown. Sure, we moved three miles away from there, but that's nothing nowadays and I felt content for quite a while. We finally had our dream home, lush gardens, great schools for our kids, a wonderful and extremely supportive church home, lots of friends and family living near us, a nice job. What more could we want?

Sure, the usual things weighed on me, but everyone has problems. Finances, kids teasing my son, and I wasn't feeling well and was often too tired to do much of anything. The doctors said that happens as you age and didn't feel that there was really anything wrong with me. There wasn't really anything that I could do about any of those problems though. We were generally pretty happy, so why rock the boat?

Shortly before my father died this small voice inside of me grew louder and more insistent. I guess it had been there before but I never listened to it. I thought it was greed driving me to ask my husband to look for a promotion. We always lived beyond our means so getting a promotion wouldn't make things any easier anyway, right?

One day, I started listening to it. I prayed that God would show us the direction that we should take. I talked to my husband about it. We gave it a lot of prayerful consideration. Son would be moving to a new school this year, his good friends would be sent to the school across town and the kids that lived in our neighborhood and teased him so much that he never wanted to play outside would be going to his school. Peanut would be starting kindergarten. Dad was making plans to move to Ohio to live near my sister who was studying to be a nurse.

We called several different real tors over to look at our house. We didn't want to make the move if all of the elements didn't fit. They all commented that our house was immaculate, it wouldn't be a problem to sell, and we could get $230,000 for it. That was more than enough to pay off the mortgage we owed and pay a good down payment on a new home. It was the perfect time to move.

We both agreed. Cheeshead decided to start actively looking for a good place to move our family. As the openings showed up, I researched the areas, the schools, and costs of living for each of the openings. Cheesehead put in for the towns we were interested in. I prayed that God would give us a great new town to call home.

One day a job in Rhinelander showed up. I had heard of it since it's not far from where my husband's dad grew up. Some of FIL's family still lives within 45 minutes of our house. We really were never very close to any of them since they don't venture far from home. I barely even knew many of them, but it would be a great opportunity to get to know them better.

He got an interview at the store in Rhinelander. It isn't any further from his parent's house than we already lived, so they volunteered to watch the kids while we checked the area out.

The town was a relaxed pace, not much traffic, and the people we met were extremely friendly which was a plus coming from the bustling suburbs of the Twin Cities. There were a few stores and restaurants, but not so many that I'd be tempted to go shopping as an almost daily hobby and overindulge in eating out which had become bad habit for us. We drove by the YMCA and saw many nice little schools neatly tucked into neighborhoods. That was nice compared to the sprawling schools in the area we came from. Lovely historic homes lined the streets. It seemed like there was a church on just about every corner of town that we drove by. It really was a perfect fit for us, God had helped us to find the perfect town to raise our family in.

The night before the interview, we stopped in to see the store. We wandered the aisles checking things out. We checked the distance from the hotel to the store so he wouldn't be late the next day. As we wandered the aisles he saw the store manager and introduced himself. We chatted for a while with him before heading off.

There was one other person who interviewed for the job after my husband's interview. He felt pretty confident about it, but we had to wait for the results. The other candidate hadn't interviewed yet. We shouldn't count our chickens before they're hatched.

I just wrote this story on my "new" blog and decided to share it here with you too. So far, so good. We love it in our new home even more than we did our old home.

Thank you for stopping by. Please leave me a message. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

My Great Great Grandpa Wolf

I wanted to share the face of my great great grandpa Wolf with Linda. She and her friends have helped my 2 cousins and I to find more information on our family than I ever dares to dream of finding.



Isreal came over from Sweden with two of his brothers in 1883. The two of the brothers changed their names upon arrival in America. Apparently WOlf sounded a bit wild to them or something.

They worked at the Sing Sing prison together in New York until they could afford to travel to MN where they began farming. Isreal and John came to the Balaton, MN area and raised their family near each other. We have found their names together in each census record that we have found. We are still researching why the third brother moved to a different area of MN.

Since Linda sent me that great piece of information we may have discovered many other family members who may have later followed the three brothers to MN. This puzzle has been so much fun for us to put together! We have pictures of the families that attended a family reunion in 1952 but we only seem to be able to identify the people from our line so far. We are working together to discover some more of our more distant relatives so we can name the unknown faces and share them with their descendants. It's so neat to see pictures of people that you may not have even known exsist, isn't it?

This is the picture of Isreal Wolf and his wife Dorothea (Larson) and their children. (Isreal is the man with the mustache and his wife is to his right) I don't want to label anyone wrongly, but I think Amanda (Grandpa's mom) is the second from our right in the back row. Isreal died in 1930, long before I was born so I was never given the chance to get to know him. My grandpa told me some stories about the family when I was younger, but I didn't pay enough attention to recall all of the details. Luckily my grandpa was insightful enough to write articles about them that my cousins and I have also recently discovered. Thank God! My prayers were answered and Grandpa is answering some of those questions I never got the chance to ask him though he has been gone for over 5 years now.

I am thinking about taking an ancestry vacation with my family at the end of next summer to do some more research. Hopefully I'll be able to meet up with my cousins too. I'm looking for museums and cemetaries for now and I'm hoping to be able to read through some of the newspaper archives. We will find the places my ancestors used to live and hopefully find their final resting places too. Cheesehead thinks this sounds like the most enjoyable vacation I've planned so far. Who would have known?

Thank you for stopping by. Please leave me a message. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

How to Ruin Christmas

Many people have been turning their attention to Christmas posts lately. I thought of a few tips to share with you while browsing through other's posts.

1. You cat lovers out there may appreicate this one. Do you remember a few days ago how I posted about our home made Christmas tree? All of the ornaments were spread all over the tree.

Don't plan on all of your decorations staying where you placed them. Some well meaning soul may want to help with a little redecoration.

Apparently Speedy doesn't like the silk poinsettas to stay on the tree. I can't blame her confusion, most people don't put flowers on a tree. None of the other ornaments seem to belong on the tree either. Anything with a hook she has figured out how to remove if I didn't wrap the fake tree's branch around it. She even figured out how to get some of those off the tree. Notice the northward migration all ornaments have made to keep out of her reach?

Tree skirts aren't meant to lay on the ground either, they must be there to cover her up. You may not be able to see her, but she's sitting under the tree on the lower right hand side of your screen. If she needs a blanket I wonder why she has fur....

2. Don't expect perfection.

Believe it or not this little duck started out it's life intending to be a snowman er... person? Plans changed when the "carrot" wouldn't stay glued shut to conceal the pin holding it in place. A beak was born and our snowperson became a snow duck instead. The wings were actually scraps from a felt snowflake in the next tip!

3. Don't give home made gifts to people who don't appreciate them.

Of course I still need to add the strings to these ornaments to make them ready to hang on the tree, but that's okay. I will put one of these into each of those stockings I made in my last post. Again I come to the dillemma of which one goes to which child.

4. Don't expect everyone to spend Christmas day with you. I mean it's not about the day really, is it? We don't know the exact day that Jesus was born on, what we're celebrating is his gift of hope to the world, not the fact that it's December 25th.

One of my friends once accused the Christians of lying to get the pagans on deck with the celebration of Christmas. Whatever, I'm not going to pretend to know all of the facts. It's not about the day, it's about sharing love, charity, kindness, and appreciation. We can not be every place on one day, it's just too stressful. Know that your loved ones are thinking of you and show your consideration for their feelings when you make you Christmas plans.

Be flexible, communicate, and work together. Christmas isn't supposed to be about creating hard feeling for unrealistic expectations or spending lots of money. Christmas is what we make it to be. Be joyful and share the love this Christmas and every day.

Thank you for stopping by. Please leave me a message and a backlink. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

Trials and Tribulations

Many people bemoan the fact that we have many trials and tribulations that we all must suffer through in life. I have found myself complaining about them too, probably a little too often. I think we all do, but we fail to think of the lessons in life that we forget without these very same trials. Those trials remind us of the lessons we learned as youth and have forgotten with the passage of time.

These trials are brought into our lives for various reasons. We may not even know why we have been put into the position we are in, we simply move through life and hope for the best. We need to remember not to just go through the motions in life, I tend to do this too often too. With prayer, I know that I can find the answers to all of my questions if I just have enough patience.

Sometimes we need reminders of what is truly important. Maybe we have forgotten to keep our life focused on what God wants us to do, so we get sent gentle reminders. Maybe it never occured to us how it was that we were truly supposed to live out our lives, so we need to be set onto the proper path.

Whatever the reasons for our trials, we must do our best not to forget the ways in which we are blessed. It seems easier to forget our blessings when we are living in times of abundance than it is when we are living through difficult times. I will work hard to remember how much I am blessed through all of the seasons of my life.

I am going to start a blessing box to help me to remember all of the reasons I have to be thankful. At times when I feel down, I will be able to look into my blessings box and remember the many blessings I have in life.

I must remind myself often. Have faith that things will get better. Do the best job you can to live in the ways you are directed to and know that you can not fail if you follow God's guidance.

Thank you for stopping by. Please leave me a message and a backlink. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy