The Wall

I was going through an old thumb drive the other night looking for a project and delete off the old crap that was on it when I came across something I had written.  It was originally written on May 2nd, 2008.  I never did get beyond the Wall that I face at the time.  Post surgery as you will already know I am way beyond that wall now.  Still I found it interesting to reread something from then.

So as you can see from the graph above I’ve been battling a plateau for roughly the past two months at this point.  For me the plateau has been 360 or as I’ve come to refer to them as ‘The Magic Number or The Wall’.  At first I thought I was just having a lazy week after having a good work.  Then I started looking at more closely as it continued for several weeks and knew I had to off hit a plateau and that if I was serous about this that I would have to take steps to break through. 

            First off I want to address the terminology being used because I really don’t like it.  A plateau is some where that mountain climbs stop and take a rest, may take a few pictures and enjoy themselves, for them it is a goal.  For people trying to lose weight a plateau is a point of frustration it is something that stops us and gets in our way.  It certainly isn’t something that we strive for or reach for.  So I say lets call it what it really is a wall.  Its something that we have to push through or climb over, it is in the end something to get past.  Now that we’ve got that out of the way and are speaking the same language lets get on with the blog.

            It’s my opinion that in order to beat something it is best to learn as much as you can on the subject.  That way you have the best possible tools to achieve your goals.  So off to the internet I went, I learned that ‘walls’ apparently come from two different possible sources.  One of the possibilities even claims that other is a biological impossibility.  I’m by no means a medical expert so I won’t even try and guess who is right in this and just present them to you as two separate concepts. 

            The first theory I came across on why have these walls when working to lose weight goes something like this.  The body needs a certain amount of calorie energy to get through the day. After all it has to do the basic things that we all feel are so important to continued life like Heart pumping, Lungs expanding and contracting, the kidney’s filtering and so one.  As we cut down our weight the amount of caloric energy we expend to stay alive goes down as well.  . 

            The next theory is the so called “Starvation mode” and it goes something like this.  Our body detects the reduction in calories and interprets that message as meaning that food is scarce.  So it goes in to what could best be described as a sort of power saver mode and saves any extra energy it can.  It makes sense in a lot of ways to me and would be a good survival method if food really was scarce.  Sadly in this case the body is miss-interpreting the message. 

            Some people say that the second one is biologically impossible, like I said earlier am not going to try and figure out who’s right and who’s wrong.  In the end the reason this happens is less important then what to do about it when it does happen.  That’s the real reason am sure many of you are reading this blog entry so lets get right in to that. 

            During my search every link I clicked offered me a new method to push through the wall or in some cases several of them..

Change things up if you have been focusing mostly on cutting back the calories then switch to focusing on burning the calories through exercise or vice versa.  If your already doing both try changing the amount you’re working out and increasing the intensity and or the resistance.

If you are not already doing so start a food an exercise log,  Keep track of everything you eating the calories too when possible.  Also including in that what you do for exercising.  It gives you a good picture of what your doing and not doing so you can really examine the changes you’re making to your life styles.

Change some of your eating habits can help so try reducing the carbohydrate and fat in take and eat more protein calories.  Just be sure to keep the daily protein calorie intake under 25% of your calories.  You can also try having days that are less restrictive in your diet plan.  That will sometimes help to keep the pounds coming off this is sometimes called Zig Zagging the calorie intake.  Along the same lines you can also adjust the sizes of the meals you eat through out the day and have several smaller meals / snacks through out the day.

I want to close with one site I came across that encouraged you to hang in their and keep it up.  Even though your not losing weight at the rate you might like, it is likely that your still losing although gradually.  This suggestion struck me personally as the height of stupidity and that it would only lead to further frustration.  So don’t just hang in there do something about it make changes and try in things.  Push through that wall and remember there will be another one at some point you broke through this one and you will break through the next one as well.

Your friend in weight loss who won’t give up and hopes you don’t either. 

Doctor's Follow Up

So today was my follow up with the doctor who did my by-pass.  I find it amusing that all of the doctors I have met and dealt with through the whole process have been skinny.  The same is true of everyone that works at the Victoria clinic as well. No way to know if this was an intentional decision or if it was just random but it certainly does stand out.  Even the hot resident doctor with the sexy accent who did the initial question was skinny.  Anyways it was just an observation that I wanted to share. 

So the appointment was pretty good.  The doctor gave me a clean bill of health and I've got the ok to go back to work.  He asked how everything was going if I was exercising and so on.  My only short fall has been that I've been forgetting to take my last vitamins of the night.  So they made a point of reminding me about that and how important it is.  At the end of the appointment I was told I would be put on the regular follow up schedule.  So now I have a follow up in 6 months and then again at the end of the year.  After that if all is still go then I will be going to yearly follow up appointments.

I think the real important and enjoyable part of the appointment was sitting in the waiting room.  In total there were 5 of us that were actively talking. 3 of us had our surgeries within a day of each other and had met in the hospital.  1 woman who was scheduled to have her surgery in 10 days and the last person had the surgery a year ago last March.  All of us readily shared our experiences with each other and everyone was happy and open about sharing.  We had all taken slightly different paths; for example some of us have been open about our surgery others have and are keeping it secret.

One of the funny things about the discussion was that the woman who had had her surgery over a year ago also had a cast on. Based on that and her physical appearance all the rest of didn't think she had a bypass until she came out and said so.  I can't imagine being at a point that when someone looks at me they wouldn't know I was once fat.

5 week update

August has been a hell of a month.  My body has pretty much got used to the effects of the surgery.   I've only found a couple of things so far I can't eat.  The big one so far is French Toast, it is a bit of a blow as I've always been a rather large fan of French Toast.  If that is the worst of it I'm sure I will live.  I've had a lot of ups and downs along the way.  Some days are still better then others and I'm sure that will continue.

At this point the biggest thing I need to focus on is taking my time while eating and making sure I get in plenty of activity.  We have picked up a Y membership, but haven't been able to make it down yet.  Our first scheduled gym time is tomorrow morning.  tamile has plans to go do aquafit with one of the ladies from our TOPS group.  I'm planning to hit the track and run week 1 session 1 of Couch to 5K Zombies Run.  Surprisingly enough I'm super excited about being able to start the Sessions.  It feels weird to say but it is true.

The loss of weight isn't the only changes that have been happening around the household.  We have redecorated what is now the guest room.  It still feels a little weird to call it that.  tamile and I have also worked through a lot of different things and have reaffirmed our power exchange.  It has been really good and things are working well for us.  I've also been encouraged to start writing again. 

By Pass Update: Day 8

So it has been a 8 days since I had the surgery.  All things considered I'm doing pretty good and feeling pretty good.  Each of the incisions, but 1, have started to develop some wonderfully colourful bruises.  The one that hasn't bruise up is healing amazingly well.  The second worst bruise of the lot wasn't part of the operation but from the bloody Heperin shot I received the next day.

Next lets look at food.  Things have changed a little bit since I last posted.  Don't worry, Jell-O is still my best friend.  Now with that out of the way I have gotten to try a few new things as well.  I absolutely loved the Mango Hurricane Booster Juice,  with it I had a protein booster. That was a big help with my daily protein. It was so nice and smooth going down too.  The one rule I did break was I used a straw.  They say that you are not supposed to use straws because it introduces to much air into the stomach.  I didn't really have any problem with it.

The next day tamile made bison burgers for herself and pureed about 2 or 3 oz of one of them along with a bit of beef broth. I can't begin to describe just how good this tasted.  It was pretty much the first amount of meet I had eaten in some time.  I was tempted to add some ketchup or maybe even some relish but I decided against it.  I wasn't sure how the ketchup my cause it to clump up in my stomach.  As for the relish I don't really have a reason why I didn't bother with that I just didn't.

More news as it happens.

Day 4 By Pass Update

Well it has been four days since the by pass.  All in all I'm doing pretty good.  I've still only had a single bowel movement and I would very much like to start having them with some amount of regularity.

Me at the start line

Saturday was pretty exciting,  Months before I knew I would be having the surgery we had signed up for the Winnipeg 5k Color Me Rad run.  I was honestly pretty torn about how I was going to deal with this.  At first I had considered just going to cheer them on and sitting at the finish line waiting for them.  Then I considered walking as much of it as I could and just doubling back to the finish line.  I went back and forth on this a lot since the surgery and before hand.  Saturday morning I was getting dressed and pulled out the shirt I had worn to the other color me rad runs I had done.  It was pretty much decided at that point I was going to walk as much of it as I could.  I nearly dropped out around the 4 kilometer mark.  But I decided I had gone that far another kilometer wouldn't hurt.  I'm really glad that I made it to the finish line and did the whole route.  It felt like a really big accomplishment.  Granted there is still apart of me that is fairly certain that while it was an accomplishment it was also a stupid decision.    In the end I guess I don't really care all that much I accomplished what I set out to do.  Next year I will be running it one way or the other.

At the finish line (Left to right Randilin, tamile, and friend)

Showing off my incisions

naviara and her father joined us as well.

We finished off the day with a stop at Ikea.  tamile and I needed new bed side dressers for our room.  I was so waiting for someone to ask to help me find something I wanted to say I was looking for the shower displays to get cleaned up.  Sadly no one asked me anything but tamile and our friend did enjoy a snack afterwards.

I of course had water!

Once home a nap was had followed by a shower, in which a lot of the bandages came off.  Then the evening was spent babysitting the the grandkids who for the most part did a good job of not poking my stomach.

Gastric By Pass - Blow by Blow

So this post is basically going to be something of a blow by blow of everything I remember from my Gastric By Pass procedure.  Obviously I won't remember all of the details I plan to share what I can.  It will be some what graphic in parts because I don't intend to hold back.

The day started just before 7 in the morning when we headed to my daughters place.  The plan was for her to drop us off at the hospital and avoid paying for parking all day.  Hospital check in was super easy, they collected some basic information and sent us on our way.  The next room was admitting,  Here they basically get you set up for the surgery.  I was taking in to the back by a little old lady who I think was a hospital volunteer.  She gather up all my personal effects and other belongings.  Everything was tagged and bagged so it would be easy to move around with it me. While here they also set up the IV, of course now I am a mover so as soon as you try and put a needle in me I tend to try and pull away.  So this took a couple of tries.  My gods did that thing hurt,  although not as bad as the Heperin (We'll get to that later).

One problem I did have through out the whole admitting process is that I was supposed to remove all jewelry.  Well I have one ear ring that I've had in my ear for over 20 years at this point.  When my wife and I first got married we were basically broke.  So one of the things that we did to celebrate are marriage is we got our ears pierced.  The problem this caused was that I haven't taken it off in over 20 years.  The two pieces of the ear ring we figured have oxidized together.  The nurses tried to use forsips to remove them twisting and turning them.  But nothing would get it off.  There was talk of cutting it off, but in the end they left it in and just taped it down.  my favorite part about the ear ring was Dr Andrews comment about it.  When he arrived in informed he had had an extensive conversation about it with the nurses.  An other one of the people I met with refereed to it as the infamous ear ring.

All in all admitting was basically prep time.  One by one the doctors and nurse I was going to be working with.  No that isn't the right way to put it I wasn't doing anything with them they were working on me.  First was the admitting nurse who went through a battery of questions.  Later came two nurses who went through the same battery of questions.  how was your boost diet?  when was the last time you ate and drank anything?  The whole process was very repetitive at that point.  After the nurses had finished one of them pulled out a razor and shaved my stomach.  I was honestly surprised by how much hair I really had on my stomach.  He also shave the top portion of my groin.  A vibrating razor at the base of your shaft didn't feel as good as one might expect.

After they were done, a student anesthetist came by, he basically went through the same questions with a focus on any past operations I had experienced.  The one thing that really excited him was that dentures.  It meant that I was a whole lot easier to work with for them.  According to regular Anesthetist said I was their dream patient.  A little while later after that a man name Mark arrive to escort me to the OR.  I'm not certain but that seemed to be his only job.  A friend who had undergone the surgery told me the walk to the OR reminded her of the Green Mile.  I couldn't help but think about that as I walked to the OR.

The OR room reminded me a lot of something out of the show ER,  It seemed pretty high tech.  I was introduced to everyone in the room while I was sat on the chair in the centre.  I honestly don't remember any of the names, other than Dr Andrews.  The biggest thing I remember about my time in the OR was that one of the nurses kept insisting I had to higher on the chair.  The problem was that I'm 6'4" and for whatever the reason they didn't want my feet hanging over the edge of the bench.  I remember wiggling up the bench and my butt feeling like it was half way up the incline.  I was sure I was going to slide back down it once the procedure started but I didn't I guess.

I woke up about 4 to 5 hours later in recovery.

The incisions

The procedure was done through 6 incision.  I was honestly fairly surprised by how many incisions they had to do.  I thought that there would be a lot less.

Apparently one of the doctors had come to me and told me that everything had gone fine and that the operation had been a success.  I don't remember his visit but he did come by later in recovery and tell me the same thing.  The other thing that they say you might or might not remember is the removal of the pipe they put down your throat.  I didn't remember it at all.

A few family members came and visited, I passed a gas a couple of times.  Honestly I figured ya me, The last gas I passed was liquidy so I thought figured it was time for the washroom.  Sadly for me it was blood.  Apparently sometimes it comes out that way.  They took some blood from me to follow up on it and do some testing.  it has been two days now since the procedure I still haven't taken a shit yet.  So far that has been the only complication I've faced.  Hopefully I will go to the washroom soon.
The rest of the day

Anyways that is pretty much everything that happened.

Update:

Two things that I forgot: the nurse would not let tamile stay with me in the recovery room over night.  This was something that they were not really clear about during the lead up.  They basically said it was up to the nurse.

Second was the Heperin, I mentioned it earlier but didn't go into any real detail.  I was woke up in the middle of the night by one of the nurses.  She informed me it was time to for my Heperin shot.  It is a blood thinner meant to help reduce the risk of blood clots.  Coming to me in the middle of the night saying it is time for a needle really isn't the best way to get me to take it.  So I turned it down in the middle of the night.  Later the next day when I was a wake and was asked about it I took it.  If you are going to take this shot ask for it in the stomach.  It still hurts like an SoB but apparently it is better to do that then getting it in the arm.

Post Doctors Appointment By-Pass Update

So I've had my doctors appointment and I also now have a date for surgery, July 23rd. Right smack in the middle of the summer.  All in all I don't overly mind the date.  It does certainly throw a wrench in to a few of our summer plans.  But almost anything we do over the summer throws a wrench in to one summer plan or another.

One thing that was really interesting about the appointment is that the doctor never really asked which surgery I wanted.  Which had been a topic of discussion between myself and tamile for several months.  He just looked over my file, and started talking about the gastric by-pass

So here is the basic run down of things at this point as I understand them.

• July 2nd: I stopping eating real food.  For the next 3 weeks I will be drinking 5 bottles of Boost Diabetic in order to shrink my liver so that the surgery can be performed safely.
• I've been told that during this time I will likely be fairly Hangry ( A cross between hunger and angry)
• July 23rd I have to be at the hospital for 6:30am.  For those of you who didn't know such a time existed it is in the AM.  Apparently normally you are in the hospital overnight
• Afterwards it is all about learning to eat again.  The first week I will be limited to liquid foods, which I will basically spend the whole day sipping at.  
• Then once I can stomach that it is time for foods that have gone through a bullet blender
• Then soft foods that haven't been blended and so.  

I've been told I could be off work anywhere from 1 to 2 months. I'm excited by this opportunity and honestly a little scared by it. I've been fat as long as I can remember and this strikes me as the best way to make a life style change that will last.  Right now the plan is to take a post a picture from Canada day, another 1 the day before surgery and regular photo updates after that.

Post By-Pass Follow Up

Sorry to keep my readers in suspense, assuming anyone is really reading this I honestly don't know.  If you are take a moment to comment on a post and let me know how you're doing.  While I don't mind the idea of doing this as a solo exercise in self discouvery it is still nice to know I'm not discouvering on my own.  Anyways back to the point of this post an update about my second follow up appointment.

It went awesome!  Shortly after I arrived I was ushered into a meeting with the dietitian.  Who tried to go over my records on My Fitness Pal.  I guess the site was down for some maintenance or something because she was having a hell of a time accessing anything on her computer.  Thankfully I had kept fairly good paper records as well.  So she was able to go through it and make a few suggestions where I needed to make further change or continue to make changes in my eating habits. Over all she was happy with what she had seen.  I asked fairly early on in the meeting what the process was at this point if I would find anything out today or if I would have to wait to receive a letter or something.  Sadly the dietitian was really noncommittal about the whole thing.

After I was done with her it was back out to the waiting room to see the nurse.  Thankfully the nurse was basically waiting for me to be done with the dietitian and so more or less I went from one office right in to the other one.  Unlike the dietitian the nurse was super forth coming about everything.  She took one look at my papers and read through the notes on my file and said I would be going forward.  The rest of my time with her was spent talking about how things would happen now.

The main difference I have seen so far is how fast everything is happening.  I had that meeting with the nurse on the 13th of May I have the first meeting with the doctors on the 29th of May.  So everything is starting to move super fast.  Of course it also seems like it was a blur because I've been insanely busy, and very excited.

Anyways their is your update for now, as always more later.

Second follow up

So this morning I received a call from the receptionist connected office that is handling prep leading up to my hope for bypass surgery.   Originally they had scheduled my second follow up appointment for tomorrow afternoon for 1 o'clock.  The first words out of her mouth was that they had to reschedule.  Honestly in that second I think my heart dropped.  Thankfully she offered me 2 options another appointment in 4 weeks time, or a slot tomorrow at 1015 am.  So without even talking to my boss, I just took the morning appointment and figured I would either work it out with or take the day off.

Anyways the day is sorted out and now my appointment is scheduled for tomorrow morning.  My understanding of it is that at tomorrow's appointment is the final one.  I will either be accepted to the program or not. I've done what I've been asked, there hasn't been a lot of weight lost since I started but I've made a lot of changes.  Anyways fingers are crossed, I just hope I actually find out tomorrow rather then having to wait several weeks to hear back.

If I'm not accepted I've been told that there is always the possibility of being given another chance.  Apparently the odds of that are very slim.

I'll let you know how it goes when I do.

Weight Loss

A lots being going on as of late, and as much as I want to be blogging about it more I am still having a hard time making this into a regular ongoing habit.  It is something that I'm going to have to keep working on & and it is only going to get harder from here.  As the summer continues my life is only going to get busier from here.

The last couple of weeks I have been really focused on getting my activity level up, tracking my food to stay under calories, and up my fruit intake.  Since I've started doing this I've been able to bring my weight down by 7lbs.  It feels really good to have been able to pull this off, and it has left me feeling great about myself.  Weight loss is a strange paradox,  It is hard to get started and then once you start having some success at it, the benefits start to really show through and make a huge difference in your life that you want to do more and more to encourage it.

Anyways on the subject of it feeling good, I should head out and go for a walk.

WSL Update

One of the first things I've learned in my WSL journey is that they have their own lingo.  WSL stand for weight loss surgery and there are a ton of different options for it.  Even the different types of surgeries have there own nicknames. Anyways lets get on with the update.

So October 22nd was when the journey began with the orientation meeting.  As over that day I weighed in at 413.4 lbs.  A 118 days have passed since the orientation and I currently weigh in at 402.2 lbs a drop of 11.2 lbs. All in all I don't think the weight drop is that big of a success, but I'm proud of it none the less.  If I had the time I would post and share a graph or something showing the weight roller coast I've been on for the past year.  This drop is at least consistent downward motion and that is what I want to see.

Since the orientation and the interview I've attended all for Craving Change courses and had my second interview with them. I don't really know what to make of the second interview over all.  I really only meet with 2 of the 4 people I met with the first time.  The dietitian was away sick that day, I have a phone interview set with her for Wednesday afternoon. The exercise person, They have a technical name for the field but I don't remember if off the top of my head, isn't part of the second interview.  Apparently that is going to be the norm going forward.  So far the biggest issue they had was that I wasn't achieve the goal for exercise.  They are looking for 150-200 minutes a week.  I've been really pushing to get more out of the stationary bike.  Gods I can't wait for it to be summer so I can get outside.  Winter SUCKS!

Anyways it is getting late and I need to get some sleep.  Work comes early in the morning.

The Interview

Well the surgery interview happened today.  I think it went fairly well I think and honestly I think it was way scarier in my head then it was in real life.  The reality of the interview was that it really was four separate interviews and at the end of each of them they give you a few goals they want you to work on.  I'll quickly run through each of them.

Medical History:  Really this one was pretty straight forward.  We basically ran through my family medical history and my own history.  The sad truth of this is my medical history is really boring.  I'm a 39 year old man who still has all four of his grandparents alive and well. My own medically history is pretty boring as well.  I've had three surgeries in my whole life; both big toenails removed, Tonsils removed, and I had all of my teeth removed to be replaced with dentures.

Dietary: I think of all the different discussion this was the one I was kind of dreading the most.  I've been using MyFitnessPal for at least a year now. So I have a pretty good history of my eating habits and I know they are shit.I have McDonalds for breakfast an average of 4 times a week.  Of course it also isn't uncommon for me to grab it or some other convenience food for lunch as well.  Bottom line is that I need to make some serious changes.  I guess I shouldn't be to concerned about my current standing, if I was doing everything right I wouldn't be going through this process

Fitness: Here we talked about what is challenging me and preventing me from being more.  For the most part I am physically able to be active.  It is a matter of getting up and making the time to do the activity.  I'm confident that the time table will keep me on track and since it will really show me where I am along the way.

Psychologist: This was without a doubt the toughest of the interviews.  I was asked a lot of why questions which I've never been fond of.  The concerns my wife has about the procedure came out most in this interview, She made it pretty clear that she would support me and be for there and their is no doubt in my mind that she would.  I'm not so sure the doctor we were talking bought it.  In the end I guess it isn't about them believing her it has more to do with my believe in her.

This was also the section where we talked most about the after effects of the interviews.  Things like a life long change in my eating habits, the need of supplements for the rest of my life, and the loose skin.

At one point in the discussion the psychologist is talking about addictions and rattling off some examples.  Tamile pipes and tosses Porn in to the mix. Then the psychologist turns and looks at me with this hugely serious face and asks "Do you have a porn addiction?" it was completely out of left field and I don't have anything close to a porn addition.  So the whole question left me speechless for a moment until I recovered with the clever comeback of "Is that on your questionnaire?" From there we go into a discussion about transferred addictions.

So the chat with with the psychologist ends with her asking me if I wanted to start Challenge Craving, a program they offer that is mandatory if you want to go ahead with the surgery, today?  I was really thrown by the question at first, but said I would Tamile brought up a concern of rushing in to everything.  The psychologist explained that they liked people to talk it as early as possible because there is a lot of information that will help make the changes.  In the end I said I would start today, but after I got home I called and asked to be removed from the class.  I've no idea if it was the right decision in the long run but it is the one I needed to make right now.

Everything has just felt so rushed in the whole process.  I felt I needed to slow things down a little bit.  Take some time to learn to make the changes that I need to make in my life so that I can be successful at this.  If I just kept rushing through everything I might just rush right past the point.

Appointment Moved Up

So I had fully intended to write tonight about RPG Night with Cliff.  Which is  a weekly RPG night that I host at my local game store.  Thanks to a phone call I received today that plan has gone out the window, instead we have more about weight loss and my journey and that direction.  I’ll talk about gaming another time don’t worry.


So like I was saying this afternoon I received a call from the hospital.  At first I assumed it was them calling me back because I had left a message with them on Monday.  That couldn't have been further from the truth.  Basically they wanted to know if I could come in for the appointment earlier.  I was  apparently enthusiastic and they had an opening.  The oblivious from was how soon?  I was expecting to be told a week or maybe two at most earlier.  To my surprise I'm going in tomorrow.

Right now, I'm super nervous about the whole thing.  Alex, my wife is coming with me.  She is concerned and has some questions she wants to have addressed.  I don't know if that is a good thing or not from their point of view, but she will be there.  Hopefully being there will help to put her at easy about the whole process,  I know she is feeling a little nervous about it.

For what has me worried is I don't know what to expect really.  I absolutely hate walking in to a situation where I don't know what to expect or what is expected of me.  So much of it is in the air in my mind.  I've been told by people who've gone through it before me to just relax.  I've set out my goals for them in my initial application and at the meeting they will set out their goals for me.

Anyways stop back tomorrow and I'll try and post something about how it went.  I'm off to try and get some sleep.

Trying to start again

Well it has been almost 2 years since I last wrote anything here. I was logging on to Blogger with the intent of setting up a new blog.  I have a lot going on in my life and figured that would be a good way to help sort some of it out in my head.  When I saw my old blog sitting there on the screen I decided that this would be the place to do it rather then starting a new one.

I could spend a month writing posts trying to update people on the various events of my life.  Instead I will just leave it out and post things that our current and that matter to me.  Hopefully they are things of interest to readers as well, but if not I don't really care all that much.

So lets get back to the reason I was on blogger in the first place and why I was looking to start a new blog: My health!  I've always been a large man, and by large I mean obese.  In fact from a medical point of view I am morbidly obese.  My BMI is in around the 50 mark. I have tried various things over the years to lose weight with different levels of success, all of which ended in long term failure and the return of any weight lost with a little or a lot extra.  :(

Now about a 1 and a half ago I spoke with my doctor about the possibility of Gastric By Pass (I know that isn't the medical term) Roughly 5 months after the referral I received a nice email say I was to fat for the guidelines under which they were doing the procedure.  So that I figure as they say was that.  Now we fast forward about 3 months ago, another letter arrives with a time and date for me to come down for an orientation session.  That was October 22nd, I left the meeting excited and hopeful about the future that the operation could lead too.

I was lucky enough to be able to talk with a couple of people who had been through the processes. They offered a wealth of useful and exciting tips.  One of those tips was to get my application in as quickly as I can. The faster I get in my application the faster I would be moving forward in the process.  So I followed the advise my application was dropped off on Friday October 31st.  This afternoon in the mail was a letter from their offices I move on to the next step which is the interview that will take place on December 5th.

Anyways the processes is underway and I will post more about it and other things going on in the next couple of days.

WARNING EMO Weight Post

I don't normally get to personal in my blog generally I limit it to things of interest to me. Instead of talking about feelings my real life. I have to get this off my chest so I can work through it and figure out just what I am going to do about it. In a lot of ways I am hoping it will help to just get it out as well. So this post may not be for everyone and if your not interested just skip past it.

Friday was awful. I had over slept and grabbed some clothing that I had only recently pulled out of storage. They had fit just fine when I put them away last year. Now of course I was running late so I didn't really stop to think to hard about what I was wearing or how it fit. after 30 minutes on the bus I knew they were tight a lot tighter than I had orginially thought. They pulled in odd places, which included the fly that would slowly work itself down as I sat at my desk. I felt so fucking FAT! it drove me nuts all day and I wanted to burn the damn shorts when I got home. To make matters worse as part of the Canada Day Celebrations they had these tubs of Jelly Beans all around the office. As I walked past I knew I shouldn't have them but every time I would always end up with a handful. As if my body didn't listen to my brain.

I'm a big guy and I have been for a long time. But I rare feel really fat. I'll feel heavy, I'll feel out of shape, but never fat. It was a really unpleasent experience but one that I am hoping will stay with me and be some amount of incentive towards working on weightloss again. lately it has felt as if it has been going in spits and spurts and I need to figure out some way to make it through and lose weight. I'm not happy at the weight I am and I have to do something about it.

So expect to see more on weightloss as the blog goes on.

Weigh in

My Weight Chart:

Weigh in

Wow it's been hard to get seriously back in to the swing of things since Keycon is over. It doesn't help that Summer is here and I'm a huge fan of slurpees. On the plus side we have pulled out the bikes and gotten them turned up. So no weather permitting and distance we are riding place.

So at least I have been able to hold my weight steady at 361.2




My Weight Chart:

Weigh In

So am running a couple of days behind in general life but am working to catch up. I was able to weigh in yesterday and much to my surprise I didn't gain nearly as much as I thought I did. I gained 0.3 *Does happy Dance* You see I was a way at a local scence fiction convention all weekend and figured my food intake was much worse then it really was.




My Weight Chart:

Weigh In

Its been a weird couple weeks for me pretty much any spare time I have had has been devoted to working on some costumes. Which as a sad aside we are not going to get them all finished in time. I was fairly certain that the end result would be a weight gain despite my best efforts in the gym. Much to my surprise that wasn't the case I ended up down a pound.






My Weight Chart:

Weigh in

Well I didn't 'break on through to the other side!' what did was more like peaking through to the other side and looking at what is there. Am not going to complain one way or the other, I am now at the lowest weight I've been at since I've started and I have at least peaked through to the side and now I plan to stay there.

Here's what I've been doing first off I've really increased my work outs. I'm follow a tread mill work out that my wife's trainer gave her and its working well for me. Also starting to use the big gym balance ball and doing crunches on it. My eating habits remain marginal at best as I often turn to comfort food when the opportunity presents itself. on the plus side am doing what I can to keep it from presenting as often as possible.

Weight Down 1.4 to 359.8lbs





My Weight Chart: